Seeking Validation

Buddhist_Nudist · 2016-02-13T16:05:39+00:00

In my opinion, RSD's Todd Valentine is the absolute best at day game. He's got a ton of videos on YouTube you can look at for reference material https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=aaI3Srkd9tY Here's one to start

I myself struggle with validation and self worth, but thing that I feel has helped a lot is to go into a set/bar/club/whatever with priority #1 being my own self amusement. Getting laid or a phone number is definitely important, but the priority is having fun and enjoying myself, regardless of how things go with women. My thinking is that, if you can come from a mindset of abundance and that you don't need this women to have fun, enjoy yourself, or just be happy, then you will stop seeking their approval/validation, becuaze you don't need it.

AfterSwished · 2016-02-13T16:04:56+00:00

a) Focus on inner validation

If you ask me, sounds like you have reason to validate and deem yourself socially worthy, if you've been working your ass off in the last months on work, fitness, health, style, grooming and every other aspect of your life. Most men do not have the luxury, energy and time to work on all that as much as you supposedly did. Heck, you have enough self-esteem to point this out:

I see guys getting lucky with women even though deep down I know that they don't take care of themselves.

So you've got a competitive spirit, but you're not more/lesser than these guys. They can learn from your achievements in the aforementioned aspects as much as you can learn from their success with women, right?

I relate to a lot of the hard work that you put in yourself, but the funny thing was: when I did lose weight and work on myself, the familiar part of my personality still reminded me that I was, at the heart, the same damn guy. Looking better alone got me more attention from women, but I still had work to do. Which brings me to your next question:

b) Become independent of social conditioning

Not sure this was phrased correctly or I'm misinterpreting you, but conditioning is mandatory. Even the socialites among us need the regular exposure or we'll get rusty. Becoming independent of social conditioning is like asking a pro athlete: "how do I become fit like you? ...You know, without having to condition myself like you do?" You'll have to work out your social comfort. Just like with all the things you've enhanced in your life, you'll have to go through the ups and downs of going out, having great nights, learning from bad ones, enjoying successful lays/dates/relationships and even enjoying nights you go home alone or with your buddies.

c) Day game pointers/experiences

Do a search on this sub and you'll find countless pointers.

Title	Seeking Validation
Author	sedthrowaway3
Upvotes	2
Comments	6
Date	February 13, 2016 1:25 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/45kahm/seeking_validation/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/seeking-validation.1402377 https://theredarchive.com/post/1402377

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