Over the course of the last month or so, I have been dealing with major oneitus with a girl. Being in highschool I tend to see her everyday and have good interactions, but whenever I try to make plans or something along the lines, something comes up. This has really frustrated me because, from what I had read and my own intuition I knew I needed to stop focusing on one girl and instead try to go on dates with lots of girls to both diversify and build rapport. The problem is, I am a decisive person and it is my nature to make a decision on what I want, pursue it, and get it, but I knew that this is not the way to attract girls. I was frustrated until I found the answer in the writings of the stoic philosopher Epictetus (who I have adored reading and recommend to anyone). In his writing, he talks about controlling what you can control and accepting fate's decision for the rest and appreciating what you have in the present and not taking it for granted that you will have it in the future. Well as I have put those principle into practice in my life I have realized that it has completely changed my approach to this girl. I realized that most of the times I was around her I would always try to make plans, but now I take Epictetus' advice and instead banter, joke, flirt, and enjoy her lovely personality completely in the moment and as if I'll never see her again, and she has responded with much more interest. Being in the moment is not the only thing Epictetus' helped me with but also the detachment to a specific result a la Zan Perrion but in a much more cerebral way that I am comfortable with. I hope this helps someone and I am sorry for the lengthy writing, thanks for always being an inspiration seddit.

TL/DR: Read stoic philosophy, cured oneitus