Hi

I have problems getting laid. On one side I can lead good conversation and even make different girls laugh.

I even went with a girl to a bar. It was really strange. On one side she was very caring and I could clearly see that she was trying to be nice/was a bit nervous and wanted to present herself in s good way. On the other side the date wasn’t really flirty or romantic. Like she once touched my spine (she wanted to highlight sth) and we were regularly touching with our knees but not more. It’s funny that I somehow wasn’t feeling horny at all and she wasn’t really flirtatious (She told me that beforehand she was at the pharmacy and had taken the “pill” and thats why she was late for our “link”). She also was the one that proposed to meet at a bar. (I only decided the day and time - she was really flexible and it felt more like making an appointment at a doctor than a “hangout”).

Some weeks ago I also went to a club with a girl and her friends (I wasn’t romantically interested in her, just wanted to get some female friends and go party a bit). There I have also talked with one of her friends and they were pretty much and we were having a good time - She even said that I probably have a lot of girls).

The third girl is a special case. On one did we were talking etc. but another colleague of mine said that she’s asexual (I myself didn’t have this feeling but who knows). But this girl also proposed (the one that’s allegedly asexual) to meet at a bar, but used the word bro when talking to me.

Kn Essence I have two questions: - One of my best friends (male) got his gf by going out with female friends and hooking up with one of their colleagues. (He recommended this as one of the best way to get girls)

Question: Should I continue to build up a female friends circle to “boost” myself and building up a network (The city and country I live in is really socially closed most people won’t hangout with you until they know you well enough).

Question 2: How should I behave? On one side I realised that when I behave like myself and don’t really care bout the outcome girls laugh more often and feel more comfortable. On the other side I’ve realised that when I’m like this I sometimes don’t even want to flirt or doing escalation (I’m mostly fed up with this shit. Especially reading all this 300 page escalation manuals in this subreddit feels so unnatural and wrong).

Don’t get me wrong - I like to flirt, but in last time it’s rarely cones naturally to me (When I want to flirt I get that “hunting instinct ” and start touching,teasing etc all by myself).

I’m basically just confused. On one side I see tremendous progress in comparison to last years (mostly by letting go and not giving a shit, having no expectations etc.) On the other side I read all that posts by people who swear on tactics and approaches they use. But on the other side again I start to doubt them… Like we’re on reddit, everyone can talk shit on the internet.

Thank you very much for reading this.

Cheers