This game is not linear

HomelessMilkman · 2025-09-05T10:20:49+00:00

I can’t seem to feel secure about myself and I’m not sure what it is.

It's an evolutionary sense of 'status', which is the entirety of 'game'.

You're more comfortable and familiar with some situations than others; you've proved to your mind that you're 'safe', you can express yourself freely without consequences. You show you're unstifled, you be expressive and fun, you get attraction and results.

In another environment, around different people, you don't know what the 'threats' are, so you're more conservative until you prove to yourself that it's okay to be expressive; i.e. you have 'status' in the situation. Though that 'status' is relative to what you believe you can get away with, how much you filter yourself to conform, etc.

The only concrete way to transcend that is to move out of 'ego based consciousness', the need to 'survive'; you have to be outside your head. You have to throw yourself into situations without looking around to see if it's 'safe', you have to trust that you are safe despite how you feel, that you don't need to judge, analyse, rank, compare, to see where you fit in and what you're 'allowed' to do.

It's non-linear because your sense of confidence is conditional. Everyone does this. They have to look a certain way, be in a certain situation, the girl has to be alone, no or poor competition, showing obvious signals, have pre-approved things to talk about, your clothes have to be marketed 'for the cool people', you have to think your house is 'cool enough' to bring her to, you have to believe your job is fancy enough to share with enthusiasm, and so on. Unless you've spent years doing meditation and see that all of these conditions are arbitrary, you have to play by society to some extent; truly being able to 'think for yourself' is liberating but obviously takes work.

Though, as Owen Cook would say, "You don't want the golden jail, you want to be free from it". Most people want the golden jail, to have all the things you're told are cool and acceptable; be a slave to marketing (social conditioning) but be 'the best slave'; but the real goal is to think for yourself and be able to dictate what's cool, especially as the social consensus just plainly doesn't work. You can 'fit in' at a high level and get results, you can have all superficial things and have the personality of a fish, the top level is obviously not needing to; standing out, without feeling vulnerable or threatened, without looking for approval but getting it anyway.

Rhino3750ss · 2025-09-04T23:08:34+00:00

You might feel like you are going backwards because you are getting used to approaching, and the more you do it, the more your own instincts are trying to tell you that by "cold approaching" you are automatically perceived by the girl's emotions as not preselected before you can even show that you are or could be. This is where that ill utilized and overused word "creepy" comes from.

That is the catch 22 that men are overlooking. Sometimes for that reason the girl can be super interested in you at first and suddenly get cold feet, and they don't even know why.

I will never recommend to give up on approaching, but it should be just used as a tool to get used to bantering with women in general for when you have the opportunities to warm proposition a woman you already are familiar with via routines and activities.

The ups and downs will happen to everyone, key is to stay mentally centered either way and don't sweat the outcomes.

miyass_miyass · 2025-09-05T18:45:49+00:00

There’s a chance you actually are getting better but aren’t allowing yourself to celebrate small wins

Life-Income2986 · 2025-09-04T23:05:15+00:00

I can’t seem to feel secure about myself and I’m not sure what it is.

Walking around and interrupting people doing other things because they made you horny is very weird and off-putting behavior. You are forcing yourself to behave in an antisocial way, and that is making you uncomfortable because other people really, really don't like that behavior.

You can try and convince yourself that everyone does it if you like, but if you were to actually stop and just look at other people, you'd see NOBODY doing what you are doing. Because it's weird behavior recommended to the least socially capable men on earth by the second least socially capable men on earth.

Title	This game is not linear
Author	imsofuckingdum
Upvotes	6
Comments	9
Date	September 4, 2025 9:24 PM UTC (10 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1n8mo6s/this_game_is_not_linear/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/this-game-is-not-linear.1561302 https://theredarchive.com/post/1561302

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