This Sub works. A Success story and quick tips.

Like many of you, I got into this sub as an early 20s dude trying to get his shit together. I had just broken up with a long time girlfriend and was like "alright time to get some poon" and decided reddit was the best way to do so. I read up on all the inner game stuff and started to cold approach like crazy. It set me on a wild whirlwind of ups and downs:

Ups

Success cold approaching (dated girls 20 years older than me, met girls in library, lunch room, beach, a few really awesome relationships/flings)
I started taking the initiative to plan trips (went to mexico and japan)
pursued hobbies (salsa/bachata dancing, backpacking/hiking/camping, snorkeling, surfing, creative writing, revamped my guitar playing)
Went to therapy
I got rid of old habits (porn, social media, using dating apps as emotional crutch)
developed new good habits (journaling, meditating)

Downs

Developed really really bad anxiety (which I fixed)
Lots of failure dating
Got caught up superficial bullshit for a while
Put work/school on the backburner bc of FOMO

I'm proud to say that I am now a mid 20s dude who's shit is slightly more together. It's a lot easier to connect with attractive women now. Currently seeing a beautiful smart woman, and I have options if I so chose.

There's a lot of bullshit on this sub, but the core mantra of "live a dope life and the pussy will follow" works. It might take a long time. It took me years before I could consistently do well with women, and a few of those years were somewhat painful. To all of you who are starting or in the middle of your pickup journey, keep fucking trying.

Some tips

Read this summary of models. Follow it
Take breaks from dating/approaching if you think you need it. Especially if you're dealing with mental health stuff
Never hesitate with matters of the heart

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

[–]asuuuhdood[S] 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

Someday I will sit down and properly write down why I hate that book but the bottom line are: 1. Mark NEVER got girls from his "tactics". What he used was classic pick up artist tricks (he was a student of styles kinda game) not whatever is in models. So to me he's already a hypocrite as he's preaching something that he never field tested.

Which leads to my next point what mark teaches are either too vague or too obvious to be of anyones help if they try and reach a level past beginner. Like cool be vulnerable but What does vulnerability mean? what are the situations you can and cant do and what patterns I can do and not do it with? This isn't a problem to guys who have had some success but for people who don't know shit this is very important. He just says these terms and philosophy without actually deciding on a consistent method to figure it out.
His shit and the book is super basic. Like its watered down pick up to sell to a mass audience. Which worked as a bunch of people who don't know anything deeper think hes like tough shit.

[–]KingRemu 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]asuuuhdood[S] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link

See that's why I said its a book more for a beginner and the very very basics of what men should learn in order to attract woman. But past that it is worthless unless you are already a guy who can intuitively figure socializing out.

TLDR: I tried it, didn't work.

Anecdotally, Models was my second PUA book and the first one I seriously applied to my life. Like you, I got rid of my overt needy behavior and started to develop more confidence. I would be more assertive in conversation, more honest, more clear in my intentions. In that time, I never really worked on my outer game as I saw that as he does "cheap tricks and shit only weird low level creepy dudes would do to prey on insecure woman". My inner self was at a all time high but you know what? It never got me woman wanting to be with me, it never got me dates and it never got me laid. I would be consistently thrown off when say a woman would want one of my friends who IMO real were not as good as me instead of me. The guys would have worse jobs or be less educated or dress worse, or not work out or not be honest or a bunch of things that the book would advocate. They were not ugly or insecure woman either (I mean some were but most were not) but high value woman and they would go for them and not me. So something else was at play. In this time, A friend of mine who was good with woman would tell me what I needed to do stuff such as go up to woman say these corny lines hiding your interest or when in set touch her after saying this, etc. I didn't believe him as his methods were the exact same the ones that Mark would detest.

Though I still needed answers so I tried looking inside Models and Marks other books/blogs searching for answers and consistently his advice would always just boil down to a "intuitively you'll figure it out" sort of mentality. Which at my point was not enough I NEEEDED to have more concrete steps, more field test stuff that would help me solidify my approach/style.

But I still didn't believe in outer game and still took models as gospel and then it finally happened: a woman liked me, went on a date with me, and became my GF. FINALLY all that hard work paid off! The method does work. This was my thinking until she destroyed me. See another failing of Marks teachings and the book is it does not teach you on how to do relationship maintenance and deal with woman BS they will throw at you (Not necessary for malice just they want to make sure your the real deal). A lot of the things that he preached completely fell apart. I would be honest with her and that would just lead to more fights. I would be assertive and that would lead to her saying I was controlling. ON and on. This negative stimulus eventually trained myself to act in a certain way that slowly withered me down till I was a hush of the guy I was before the relationship. Luckily, I did get out on my terms but never got back to my former self fully.

I then started to analyze what went wrong and I came to the conclusion that I needed to do a LOT more tactics as I was simply out played at every turn. I then looked back at my friend who was successful with woman, who had had many beautiful women at the same time for a long time, and realized all his advice he was trying to give me, that sounded like stupid PUA/manipulative bullshit, was right. Had I just done these from the beginning I could've avoided a lot of my heartache and be more successful with woman. And so from then on I disavowed Mark and started to learn outer game and studied many different PUA "gurus". After this I started to have better relationships with woman, they started to chase me more, and I got on more dates/lays then I ever did with learning models.

So to me he is a good starting point and I thank him for helping through getting the building blocks in order to get good. However, past that I cannot recommend him like people do on this sub as this "follow him completely and you will be fine" my previous self is proof it does not work for guys who are not intuitively gifted with how social interactions work.

Edit: grammar and added a end.

[–]KingRemu -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I then started to analyze what went wrong and I came to the conclusion that I needed to do a LOT more tactics as I was simply out played at every turn.

The thing about tactics and technical game, routines and whatnot, is that it's really draining and not genuine. Sure it'll absolutely get you laid but when you run out of tricks, and trust me eventually you will, you're left with nothing. You can't hold a long term relationship together with game. You need to be genuine, respect yourself and know your boundaries.

Some women will test you to see if you're truly confident and congruent with your words and actions but as a truly confident man you can just laugh it off. You should not take that kind of shit and definitely shouldn't date women that give you a hard time over nothing. Gaming and using psychological tricks in a LTR is not a real relationship and will cause you problems. Know your worth and have respect for yourself and others will too.

[–]James_Cruse 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

These comments sound like you haven’t been in any successful long term relationships.

Mark Manson’s Models is the most over-rated book on seduction ever.

One of the most important ways to have a successful relationship is setting frames artfully.

Setting and maintaining frames is also one of the most important aspects of seductions and can be very important at work and at school, depending on the circumstances obviously.

Mark Manson never discusses this in any form. Are setting frames tricks? Women set frames ALL ALL THE TIME. Healthy, normal women set frames or try to all the time. Many times those frames do not benefit you, the man, or the relationship as a whole.

This is one of many criticisms of the book. If you want a better book on healthy seduction, ‘How to Make Girls Chase’ by Chase Amante is the best book to start with.

[–]KingRemu 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]anon18801 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Title	This Sub works. A Success story and quick tips.
Author	asuuuhdood
Upvotes	57
Comments	10
Date	November 29, 2020 9:45 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/k36u7e/this_sub_works_a_success_story_and_quick_tips/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/this-sub-works-a-success-story-and-quick-tips.1296373 https://theredarchive.com/post/1296373

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