This is something I came up with from ideas here on seddit and the help of some evolutionary biology books and articles I’ve found online. I’m open to criticism and comments, so feel free to give me your two cents.

When we buy a new phone, we usually get a manual that explains all of its function and how to get it to do certain things (e.g., how to change the ringtone). However, when we are born, we do not come with manuals, and we are more complicated than phones. Evolutionary biology is the closest thing we have for a manual for human beings. One of the tenets accepted in the evolutionary biologist, without argument, is that humans rank each other — this can happen subconsciously or consciously, but it really happens! When you are working in a group, usually someone takes charge, and everyone accepts him as the leader because he is the most “high value” person there. If he is not the most high value person there, the other people in the group will usually turn him down for the position, and the real “alpha” will take over.

Why do we have ranks? Apes (as well as cavemen) use these ranks to increase their chances of survival. In their community, apes usually pick the strongest apes and judicial apes which is also well rounded for the job as the alpha. With the ranking system, an ape that ranks number 3 won’t give shit to ape number two because he knows that apes number two will beat the shit out of if he tries. Apes can also form alliances and take down someone that is above them, but apes only do that when the ape that is above them has being shit which is actually hurting the survival of the community. Much like ranking is in apes, it is all in our DNA.

How does this tie to romance? It is a known fact by scientist and pretty much everyone that the higher quality male gets the first pick on the women. Scientist have recorded that people who are socially awkward lower their standards because they know that they can’t get someone that is “higher value”, so you can say they settle with the scraps.

What is the solution for this? Be higher value. One time I was on the train, and I knew I was never going to see a girl there again, so I figured I might as well test one of my theories. I told myself that I was going to act like I were Brad Pitt when I approach her, and just act exactly like him, as if I were in a movie playing him hitting on girls. It worked, and the girl was crazy about me at first, even though I thought she was WAY out of my league. We went on a few dates, and I managed to fool her, but you could tell that she picked up that I wasn’t as high value as her — she had a ton of accomplishment of merit and was a super well-rounded individual. My micro-expression betrayed me, and gave off that I wasn’t as high value as her, and eventually she nexted me. So you really can’t fake being high value for long because your expressions will betray. Of course, talking calmly, eye contact, kino, showing that you have high standards, showing you’re not easily impressed, and just holding an interesting conversation are all the foundation of having higher value, but it won’t get you far if you really aren’t high value.

Is your value as a person the same as your “dating” value. Allow me to retrogress a minute — I have a close friend that used to be a total loser! He was overweight, barely passed high school, and he was just the epitome of a walking insecurity. Now, he’s jacked, president of a company, and a PUA. Genetically speaking, he’s not attractive, but you’d be surprised at to how many women become attracted to him right after they have a conversation with him or find out he’s the president of the company. I’ve seen hot babes ogle him and say he’s super hot. Yet, on tinder he gets no matches — and believe me, he uses his best pictures! I also have this one girlfriend that isn’t super hot, but she has perfect game (she’s not a PUA, she’s just a jerk I guess). She’s about average looking, but when when you talk to her, she makes you feel like you are way below her, and she is trying to be really nice to you because she has to and feels bad for you, but deep down you don’t really know if she cares about you or not. Because of that, guys assume she’s higher value than she really is, and as a result it becomes a self-prophesy and she really does appear as higher value, but in reality she has nothing going for her (and like I said she’s average looking on a good day). I also have friends that are super attractive, yet I have managed to steal girls from them just because I come off as higher value by being the leader of the group (usually my friends ask me for advice, and do other stuff in from of girls that make me seem higher value). So no, looks are important to some extent, but value easily trumps looks. Also, I’ve been on /r/askwomen and most-to-all women admit that they would rather date a high value guy than a supermodel (they say they looks only go so far, but there is more to whether they’d date someone). Women go on dates with guys they don’t like, at all, and then they later start to like him — the women that usually go on those type of dates also say that the guy asked them out nonchalantly. I’m not encouraging this, but it’s something I thought I’d bring up.

My call to action is that if you want to get women, you have to actually become high value. Get a good job, read a lot of books, become passionate about a hobby (this is actually the key for confidence), and just become an awesome, interesting person. As you know, you can’t fake value.