A girl rejected me twice because she thinks I’m a player. She didn’t say it directly, but I overheard from a mutual friend. I’ve been hot-and-cold, flirty with other girls in front of her, socially adept, and emotionally strong (non-reactive, enough self-respect to walk away, at least on the surface).

Basically, I played the game right (Trust me, I used to be horrible at this, and I’ve spent years learning and sharpening my game. I’ve never played this game better throughout my entire life), and I still lost her. According to the mutual friend, she firmly believes I’m a player, felt super insecure wirh me, and really wanted to get me out of her mind for good. Apparently, she felt extremely guilty when rejecting me, but she had to do it for her own sake.

The problem is, I’m not a player at all. I hate casual stuff and want a serious relationship. But casual is the key to the game, so I had to do it, then I got labeled as a player and there’s nothing I can do about this girl whom I truly genuinely like.

If I cave and change my behavior/style, she’d know I did it to get her, and she’d double-down on the player label. If I walk away and continue my lifestyle, she’d think she’s right and double-down on the player label. There’s literally nothing I can do.

People would say move on to other girls. Thing is, this girl is 1000% my type in every way and she’s truly a nice girl, which is super rare nowadays.