What’s the difference between staring and maintaining eye contact?

MisterRight1 · 2018-06-13T20:06:50+00:00

The other replies in here are either wrong or don't answer your question. The true answer is that they are one in the same. What you should be asking, however, is how do you maintain eye contact without making the subject uncomfortable?

There are two key answers to that question.

When they move to break eye contact (for example during a conversation) so should you. Continuing to try to force eye contact will make them feel uncomfortable. When they return to making eye contact, so should you.

Thus you could saying trying to hold eye contact too long is "staring" (but it's much better to say that it makes the subject uncomfortable)

Distance (surprisingly) is a big factor. If you try to make eye contact from too far away it can make the subject uncomfortable. Really only try to hold eye contact when the subject is no more than 10ft from you.

But staring into someone's eyes is not really an issue if done correctly. So asking what is considered staring isn't really the question you need to be asking.

okuli · 2018-06-13T19:11:43+00:00

When girl find you attractive, eye contact and touching would be taken very positively. The same things would be creepy if she don't like you. So you need to read clues whether she likes you. The same applies to what you say: when she's aroused you can say "I want to fuck you" and it will be extremely sexy. But if she don't want you - it's a harassment.

recyclablebanthas · 2018-06-14T04:09:58+00:00

Staring and "maintaining eye contact" are not the same thing. This is not even a question.

In the dictionary, "staring" is defined as, Looking fixedly or vacantly at someone or something with one's eyes wide open.
Eye contact is when two people are aware of looking directly into one another's eyes.

Staring can be one-sided. It's defined by someone looking at someone or something "fixedly," persistently, or vacantly (without expression and/or empathy). Often, unblinkingly is implied with "staring" as well.

And here's the problem with staring; we're talking about looking at someone with an unchanging fixedness or persistence. But looking at a person is a non-verbal social interaction: like a non-verbal conversation without words. Conversations are not one person interacting AT the other person unchangingly; They're give and take, call and response.

Staring is the non-verbal equivalent of talking to someone, not listening to what they have to say, and possibly talking over them.

Whereas eye contact at least includes the possibility of a two-way exchange and acknowledges two people, and awareness, in the definition. You can show confidence with good eye contact, but staring crosses the line into being tone-deaf because if your eye contact doesn't change in some way due to feedback, it can easily be interpreted as if you are someone who is going for what they want, regardless of what others want.

Staring is easy to identify and avoid doing. There are tons of ways that one can calibrate their eye contact without sacrificing framing or confidence, etc.

Do the triangle: alternate your gaze from one eye, to other eye, to mouth, rinse and repeat.
Don't end eye contact by dropping your gaze.
Your eyelids and other facial expression elements can come into play to communicate non-verbally as you're looking at someone, without even needing to break eye contact; this is more human than "staring," which is defined as having a blank or unchanging expression with wide eyes.
Gestures are a nice way to spice up eye contact. So are smiles. A goofy wave or smile can break the tension without sacrificing anything.

hunterpua · 2018-06-14T09:29:18+00:00

You're allowed to blink when you simply maintain eye contact.

No need to over complicate this with esoteric mumbo jumbo.

HaircareJohn · 2018-06-14T17:56:31+00:00

staring is when you keep eye contact for too long without taking a break. Eye contact is when you take 1-2 second break (from looking at their eyes) after a few seconds of eye contact.

hunter32tz · 2018-06-13T18:35:32+00:00

Good eye contact: you convey emotion through facial expressions. She says something that you actually think is funny? Open your eyes up a little bit and grin. Says something crazy or stupid? Show your disbelief by opening your mouth like you’re in shock. Obviously don’t over-exaggerate or excessively use this, but you get my point.

Staring is literally just maintaining a blank “poker face”.

Title	What’s the difference between staring and maintaining eye contact?
Author	BimmerSquad
Upvotes	9
Comments	11
Date	June 13, 2018 6:17 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/8quoma/whats_the_difference_between_staring_and/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/whats-the-difference-between-staring-and.1448160 https://theredarchive.com/post/1448160

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