I am a 30 year old guy living in Delhi (India). I have been dating/flings (15-20 girls) since 18 but recently came across game. The girls I dated, there wasn't much consistency to how I met them.

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In the last two years I have had a couple of bad interactions with 3 girls (almost back to back). The last one was pretty nasty for me and I ended up seeking therapy for a couple of months (there were other things which contributed as well). Therapy didn't give me the answers that the game/PuA/seduction community has and I am extremely thankful for that.

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Before I proceed further I want to share a couple of objective facts about me (and this is honestly not an attempt to brag but to openly share the state of my mind):

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  1. I graduated from a top tier engineering college (<1% acceptance rate)
  2. I am entrepreneur by profession, I sold off my company last year (but somehow it didn't lead to a lot of cash)
  3. I can program/code and also be the business guy (doing startups has taught me that)
  4. Currently I am earning somewhere around $70,000 USD and in my country that is a HUGE amount of money for somebody to be making in a single year.
  5. I am 6 feet and I also work out, in fact I have been practicing Brazilian Jiu Jiutsu for the last year
  6. I am outgoing and I keep traveling
  7. I read and extremely passionate about music.
  8. The people that I work with are usually with Ivy league or big internet companies (facebook, google, amazon engineers).
  9. Finally I am very open minded/non-judgmental. I have had open relationships and even an mfm (devil's threesome) once.

Yes the above things make me feel that I should get the best girls out there but I also understand that nobody owes me anything and I make sure that I don't droll out the above things in a social interaction, in this sort of mathematical/logical way.

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However the rejections + my interpretation of game has led me to a a conclusion of who you are objectively doesn't matter.

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So much so that when I meet girls on dating apps or IRL I give them a bull shit answer (like saying I am a night guard or some other blue collar kind of job) for when they ask what I do. It sort of builds tension and drama. However, when objective facts about me start coming up, I don't feel any raw attraction as such. I am not sure if I am not picking on it because I am in my own head which keeps going nothing you are matters or if I am not that much for this girl or if I am not communicating it well enough. And yes I understand that people are flaky but then shouldn't my value make them less flaky for me?

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There were a couple of other things that happened in the rough patch that I had, I was really trying hard to find an anchor point, some sort of support. So I reached out to a couple of exes, some of whom really loved and adored me. And I just felt that they didn't really want to be there except for one. Even that was very unsettling because girls who saw value in me at one point didn't see it anymore?