The night started great, went to the club with my wing and best mate, and we hitted it off, many approaches fun mood (big party in town) near the end, we decided to go home, near the door I got eyeballed by my ex-fwb and the girl I have huge one-itis on. I told her two weeks ago about my feelings and she started crying, it has been an 6 month long cycle with her which emotionally fucked me up for real, she is manipulative, but she gave me sex, yet not enough positive things to keep her. I decided to stay in the club and my mate left, so I went a round and decided to talk with her, me being a drunk fuck confessed I miss her, she was unresponsive and started kissing with a dude in front of me, giving me this "FUCK YOU" look. From that moment I totally lost myself, and I still get chills thinking about this, this is not me, this is not who I am. I walked towards both and pushed the dude and her pretty hard, whispered in her ear: "if you fuck him, I will laugh in your face" she smiled and I left to prevent worse from happening. I was so mad, and agressive I totally lost control of myself. Outside I waited for both to come out, since I wanted to punch both!? They didn't come and I drunk texted her shit, about regretting that I approached her six months ago, and how she is a pain in the ass, and a slut... AKA I was fucking butthurt and beta as fuck over her. Later on she left with the dude, and I almost wanted to pull both of their bikes but decided to behave.. I parked my bike, decided to take a piss, and than a group of eight guys run toward me trying to steal / fuck with my bike.. and push me while pissing, I instantly punched the first guy in his face and told them to fuck off, or worst would happen. They left... I feel so bad now about losing ALL but ALL self control, I never punched a guy in all my club years, I am never agressive and never butthurt like this. I am broken now... I don't know what to do.. This girl has made me a wreck.. and pulled me down.. She has been manipulative the last six months, I know I sound like an asshole in this story, but she is crazy, she faked being raped, abused, she pulled me in and wasn't releasing me.. She knew what she was doing the last six months to fuck me up mentally, and she knew what she did yesterday... I can almost cry I failed and made her "happy" again, by seeing me struggle.