As someone with very mild ASD at 25, I consider myself pretty optimistic, self-accepting, and action-driven yet even for me, being non-NT is absolutely brutal long-term. And I'll tell you why.

EVEN IF I get that group of friends and "get the girl" initially, they will drift over time through literally how my brain is wired genetically (NT vs. non-NT). The only people I can genuinely connect with to avoid this are people with VERY mild ASD or a niche portion of people who are neurodivergent.

Some stats. 85% of people are neurotypical, meaning that only 15% can be considered non-NT. Out of those, only 1% have ASD. And of those, less than half can even remotely be considered "high-functioning". Those people would be my "tribe".

Regardless of those circumstances, I have a job and all that shit because you put on a mask but for anything deeper, an overwhelming majority of people feel the disconnect with me. I'm okay in my own skin but that doesn't make the literal brain wiring and difference socially change anything.

So think of the typical screening process of finding someone you'll connect with long-term, and now remove 95% percent of your options. So imagine you have 10 options from putting in the work to reach out and knowing what you want. 5% of 10 is half a person. You need 10 people who fit your realistic standards and are interested in you to then get the chance at half a person. Amazing! Lmfao.

In the rare off-chance that I do end up with someone NT who is accepting of it, I can tell you that it's a fucking brutal uphill battle. If you see forums for NT and non-NT married partners, most end in divorce or heartbreak. I won't say too much because it's a quick google search and speaks for itself.

As a quick side note, it's to the extent that NT partners were making posts saying that non-NT people with masks legally needed to share being non-NT because we were somehow a drain or nuisance to NT people. Think of those niche narcissist and sociopath hate-venting forums and channels. It's like that for non-NT except without any of the benefits that say a sociopath would have lol.