Throwaway account.

So I was dating this girl for a few weeks, when this other girl which i had previously had a crush on for a long time wanted to hang out.

I thought she just wanted to smoke hookah, but the longer I was there I was getting vibes like she wanted to do stuff. She did. we did stuff.

I felt bad because I cheated on my girlfriend, but that relationship had been over for a week before that night anyways, and also this girl was almost an idol in my eyes. ( not dropping names, but she is a little famous)

The more I did that the more pressured I felt by her to do more stuff, we still hung out a lot after that and had casual sex, but about a week after I felt wrong about it, and voiced how I felt to her. She kept harassing me about it until I realized she wanted a relationship, but the more I had gotten to know her, the more I realized I did not want a relationship with this person any more than friendship. I also told her about my religious beliefs (which I try my best to stick to) and how I had violated them with her and I felt wrong about it.

We spent a long time hanging out as friends ignoring this white elephant in the room, and still occasionally having sex, but I still always felt pressured.

When we hung out she always wanted me to kiss her which I didn't want to do, And hold her hand which I didn't want to do, those are relationship kind of things, and I don't want that, and I don't want to lead her on, but she would physically hold me until I would kiss her or whatever and wouldn't let me leave. The few times i did leave she would always make me feel like shit about it, like saying I'm an asshole for not giving her what she wants or am only interested in my dick (along the lines of "typical men").

Often times her kissing me would lead into sex, not because I wanted it, but because she would physically arouse me with kissing and making out. I have always felt a little raped by her.

I'm really bad with words, so I apologize at how badly I'm wording this right now. But I really need your advice. What do I do in this kind of situation. I don't want to lose her as a friend, but I also don't want to feel raped.