So, here's a selection of female and/or feminist voices speaking out against the bigotry that has been going on in this movement for several years. This is meant as an aid/resource for discussions.

EDIT (inspired from comments) to clarify what I mean by "aid for discussions":

I want to make it clear that these do not "defend men" by any means. What they are is feminists tone policing other feminists. When you are in a discussion with a feminist, and he/she/* goes off the rails, you can use these in a comeback to show them or even just the audience (if any) that they indeed have gone off the rails. Providing material like the one listed below can also help you to appear well versed in feminist issues which adds weight and balances critizism you may bring to the table. I've had good experiences with using several of these to achive the before mentioned outcomes. Hence I share this list.

Pointing out the cognitive dissonance

Mike Prysner Full Speech 2008 Winter Soldier in Maryland

Find and point out the parallels between his experience of performing racism as a soldier participating in torture practises in Iraq with Rebecca Reid's account about Should feminists stop shaming men on the internet

Note that in both cases an exhaustion of rage and an unmaskable feeling of compassion for a suffering fellow human being, accompanied by guilt for being the source of said suffering, are the key steps to break down the cognitive dissonance.

Another piece going into the same vein as Reid's: Lissa Rankin M.D. - Women, Please Stop Shaming Men

If you're dealing with intersectional feminists

They will have a hard time dismissing the voices of Indian women and other groups their theory suggests to be marginalised.

Arundhati Roy - Come September Speech

Points out group-think, tribalism (in the form of nationalism), black/white thinking (calling people anti-xyz) and further. She is an intersectional feminist and a brilliant one, which will make it hard for them to argue against it.

Dehli Poetry Slam: All Men Are Not Monsters

The title says it all. When someone posts something going into the direction of "YesAllMen", just reply with this little piece.

If you have more for this section, I'd appreciate if you share it in a comment, so I can add it here.

The leadership is appalled by those actions

Judith Butler is arguably the mother of modern feminist theory. Here is an account of her strongly disapproving of feminists forcibly pushing her work on the reading list of a Professor at Lund University, Sweden.

UN Women's good will ambassador Emma Watson:

Fighting for women's rights has to often become synonymous with man hating

Emma Watson at the HeForShe Campaign 2014 - Official UN Video

Dorris Lessing (Nobel Prize in literature) speaking out against manhating feminism

Elisabeth Nüsslein-Vollhardt (Nobel Prize in Medicine) pointing to women's performance defecits as a reason for their underachievement in STEM (in German, "emma" is apparently the german equivalent to Ms Magazine. Use google translate (not linking, since I use https://www.deepl.com/translator)

Further voices of women speaking out against the shaming culture

Deborah Soh's (Canadian Sexologist) pieces on gender/sex and related politics

The voices of women speaking out AGAINST MeToo

Tons more here, of course.

Pointing out the crisis of liberalism

The crisis in feminism is part of a deeper crisis in liberal theory and the liberal movement. Christopher Hitchens published a book in 2003 under the title the death of the liberal class in which he adresses the topic extensively.

Christopher Hitchens - The left has become conservative & reactionary

Jonathan Haidt - 'What on Earth is Happening to Us'

I hope that gives you some inspiration to enter those discussions prepared.

Remember Aristotle: luck is what happens when chance meets preparedness, so prepare yourself to turn chances into luck!

And remember Niemöller's warning:

First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out— Because I was not a Socialist.

Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out— Because I was not a Trade Unionist.

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out— Because I was not a Jew.

Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.

Speaking out on behalf of others is not merely altruistic.

Best of luck and much success to you. May the best arguments win.