Recently an all male band had to kick one of their members out because of an accusation by a fan with which one of the members had sex with.

The girl defended the band member in her accusation to say the sex was consensual and they were both drunk. And she acknowledged that no condom was going to be used.

She allegedly asked him not to finish in her and he did, whether it was on purpose or not I have no idea.

The band member was swiftly fired from his job because the news made the rounds on Twitter.

I’m neither friend nor foe of the band member in question but I do enjoy their music. I think it was extreme of the band to let the bass player go and I’ve had a discussion with friends about this but it’s been brought to my attention that I was being ignorant because the band member violated her request.

My argument is that, as I understand the facts presented in Twitter by the fan; it was consensual, they were both cool with not using a condom, there was recognition of their insobriety and she didn’t tell him to stop having sex but that it was against the rules to completely unload in her. So I extend my argument to say that there should be a common sense acceptance that bodily fluids will be exchanged and that she would have come into contact with his semen due to precum whether he pulled out or not.

Finally I said that if there were rules than neither should have agreed to it. Of course he didn’t respect her request but if the absence of a condom was the price she was willing to pay to engage in sex with the guy, than it was her choice. There were no charges or anything and her post was largely useless other than getting the lad fired from his band who is doing fairly well.

I’m also trying not to victim blame as I don’t think their was an out and out victim. As in, both parties made a bad choice. In my opinion they just should not have engaged given the circumstances.

So I’m asking your opinion on this situation? Am I right? Could I improve my argument or am I just being a dick defending this guy I don’t know but feel bad for because he lost his gig over a bad decision that hurt, in my opinion, no one.

I don’t want to give away the band or get them any “bad press” as I think their good and don’t deserve to waste their time with shitty dramas - I’d rather they push on and succeed however they can.