My wife (30F) and I (31M) lucked out and had a boy and a girl. My wife had a hard pregnancy with my son, causing her to not want any more kids. I agreed, and also agreed that it would be easier for me to undergo surgery than her. Given that she was adopted, if I had the vasectomy and we later wanted a child, we could do for another what her adopted parents did for her.

We made a doctor's appointment 2 months after my son was born for a consultation, and the doctor told us to wait. Of course we'd feel done after just having another. Give it time, make sure it's the right choice.

Fast forward two years, we had a lengthy discussion on the logistics of having another child. Financially, we'd have to upgrade our vehicle and house. Government kickback falls off significantly after the 2nd child. Maritally, two kids has been stressful to our marriage. As expected, there's little sex, and minimal opportunity to connect as a couple. And as we found out, 2 kids does not equal twice the work. It's like the difficulty scales multiplicatively.

I rebooked the consultation, followed by the procedure. The first 3rd was pretty uncomfortable. Between the pinching, poking and freezing, it hurt. Once the freezing took effect though, I still couldn't really relax. I was on edge for the next shooting pain. Didn't happen, luckily.

Anyway, as I lay in bed, my balls faintly aching from the surgery, my mind can't help but wonder if the right choice was made. Should I have bothered if the sex has been minimal? What if the marriage doesn't work out, I can't exactly give anyone kids. I try to reassure myself by thinking about the financial and emotional burden, and yet I can't shake this feeling of unease.

I just wanted to know if there's any other men here than can relate. I find talking to strangers easier than loved ones.