Creating space without rejection

Jenneapolis · 2021-05-15T17:30:46+00:00

So I will be honest, I’m a little concerned this is dangerous game playing. If you were saying you really need your space because it’s just too much for you, then I would be honest about it. However asking for space because you fear he may become disinterested in you sexually - I feel like creating distance for that reason isn’t healthy. You are trying to guess what might happen and I think the risk is real that he does feel rejected or becomes less interested because he feels pushed away. It is completely normal for passionate crazy sex to wane over time. I would have a conversation about ways that you could spice it up with him. If you both agree space is a way to do that, then that’s great, and there are a lot of other ways too, but I worry about risk if you start to just create space without telling him why.

Lando_620 · 2021-05-15T21:59:17+00:00

Creating space for this is a dangerous and misguided solution. The idea of space is to incite more chase and longing but you can do that in other ways that won't be nearly as jarring/damaging.

For example the next time he goes to initiate anything sexual, don't say no, but escape and playfully tease him. You will want to be subtle so as to not seem eager but overt enough he doesn't give up. Basically, you want to behave like prey to illicit his hunter instincts.

DelicateDevelopment · 2021-05-15T17:07:23+00:00

Have you already tried "playing" with him, as in creating distance by focussing on something where you pretend is more interesting than him. He might notice that he is not at the center of your attention and likely will test if you immediately focus on him as soon as he talks to you. So don't let him see how your attention actually shifts but let him come and "earn" your attention. If you combine this with a playful and teasing attitude, by e.g. innocently, playfully moving in ways where you know that he likes it, it could turn out to be fun.

I would never say something like "let's have some distance I am afraid you or me might get bored". I think this can be misunderstood on many levels, he might even wonder whether you trust his sincerity with you. Let him with respect to that make his own decision and don't invent something just because you think he needs more distance. However, if you feel that this is more closeness than you can handle, then maybe just withdraw physically in the apartment to a silent space and tell him that you are a bit tired and need some space for yourself.

Advanced_Bar_673 · 2021-05-20T03:03:00+00:00

Interesting feedback, thank you everyone!

I'm certainly not trying to play any mind games or manipulate. I just want to maintain spark and desire, which I think most people acknowledge will fade over time due to constant exposure to the other person.

I guess all passionate relationships eventually become comfortable, companionate love? I don't mean it like a man can't think for himself, but even the most amazing meal becomes boring if you eat it everyday so I just want to avoid the mundane from happening in my relationship. In my experience, men have told me they frequently don't even know why they become bored when dating or in a relationship... they just wake up and feel different. Now perhaps the woman slept with them too quickly, or any number of factors to cause this. But it's worth noting imo.

Just want to maintain desire and lust as much as possible in my relationship. Thanks everyone!

Title	Creating space without rejection
Author	Advanced_Bar_673
Upvotes	9
Comments	4
Date	May 15, 2021 3:31 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/nd1gf3/creating_space_without_rejection/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/creating-space-without-rejection.756815 https://theredarchive.com/post/756815

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