Same Old Story and how to Change it

Aww Shit, here we go again! What should we do in life? How do I get the girls? If I like my ex-girlfriend’s photos, will she get back with me? Blah blah blah. Here let me give you some numbers and statistics on why you are a simp. And let me mathematically prove that your girl is a whore. Aaaand no one cares. Contrary to popular belief, what changes culture and lives are not facts and statistics but truth and stories! We need to change the stories of our lives, and reconsider the narratives we’ve created about others. We also need to stop believing the confines people hoist on us. In this post I will go over the need for stories and narratives, why you prefer the stories you know, and what can help you rewrite your own.

Why we need stories 

Simply put humans are story tellers. Long before mass media and writing were a thing, history and culture was passed orally through stories, poems and ballads. And the reason for passing these tales over the ages is not just for entertainment, but it is to pass on identity and a way of looking at the world. Much has changed over the years, our need for story telling persist. Your identity is tied to the past, it’s part of the reason why in many cultures it was common that your name included who your father was. Johnson means son of John. Ahmed ibn Fadhlan means Ahmed, son of Fadhlan. Adam the first man was called the son of God. The reason for this inclusion is to tie the present with your heritage and the deeds of your forefathers whom without you would not exist.

The past both good and bad, played a role in shaping who you are today. Stories and culture are not just about shared experiences, food preference or idea references, but a way of living and making sense of the world; our individual lives are too short to figure out most problems in life. Culture and stories are shortcuts, mental models which we use to navigate life. Which is why whenever parts of a story get erased, forgotten or tampered with, people lose their way. Mess with the structures people use to make sense of their lives, and you destroy the foundation upon which identity rest. This explains why many youths in the west are lost. Culture has changed rapidly and the old ideas and ways of being are no more. You can’t just destroy culture and expect people to just figure it out. Culture is a machine that is built up over generations, it’s hard to build, easy to destroy. Replacing it with something functional? Well, that’s another story.

As for the individual we also need stories in our own lives. Though not necessarily true, we tell stories about our past experiences to try and make sense of our lives. We ascribe value and morality to past experiences for our own good or detriment. A good example of what happens to an individual who has his story destroyed is when a Beta Nice Guy gets divorce raped; he used to be a husband, father, provider now he is a single old man! How many times have you heard something like this “What, but I did everything right?” ,“I am a good Christian but women don’t find me attractive.” “But I went to college, so why cant I get a good job?” The problem with these types is they believed a false narrative or an outdated one that if they did X, they would get Y, it’s also a form of covert contract. Conversely the only way that men can turn their lives around is they must develop a new story about themselves, I will cover this later on.

Why you prefer the same story

Thinking is hard work. I am not being ironic or facetious. As stated previously your own life is too short to figure everything out. Previous generations left models and templates on what worked for them in life. This is actually an advantage if the model still works. The problem is when the old ways are no longer congruent with reality. Enter the boomers and their useless tropes. “Why I bought my house at 18 why can’t you do it? “or “ Getting a job is easy, just go to the local factory and ask for one.”  A lot of models are outdated especially when it comes to dating and relationships. For some reason many men still treat dating as if it was the 1950’s when that kind of life no longer exist. That 70 years have passed, yet people still cling to old models shows how difficult it is to replace outdated models both in society and ourselves.

Your own time and resources are limited. And your mind is not that receptive to new changes. The mind likes consistency. It is said that people do not rise to the occasion, they fall to their basic level of training.  Whenever the mind is confronted with problems, it is inefficient to try and figure things out on the fly, instead the mind looks to what worked in the past and tries to force fit new problems into old solutions. Perhaps the models worked in the past, but often enough models need to be updated. Throwing a tantrum was a great strategy when you were a toddler, not soo much when you are 19 and your parents tell you to get a job.

Have you ever started improving some area of your life like your diet? Maybe you lost a lot of weight, or stopped drinking so much, what was the reaction from friends and family? Why I bet they loved the new you, and you inspired them to get their own lives in order…right? Wrong! The most common experience I have seen is people questioning you for “not being yourself” or thinking you are better than them. Perhaps you are starting to implement redpill practices in your life and the girl that friend zoned you told you to stop because “the real you is nice.” This begs the question: Why all the hostility? It is because you are changing the script! People already have an image of you as either a pushover, a slob, drunk, etc, and they would rather not have to think too much about the new you! They prefer the old narrative, they prefer the old predictable you.

Get Zeroed Out or Repent!

A man walks into a general store and notices the owner's dog whimpering beside the counter. Concerned, he asks the owner why the dog is in pain. The owner replies, "That's Rover's usual spot. There's a nail sticking up that's causing him discomfort." The man asks, "Why doesn't he move?" The owner responds, "I guess it doesn't hurt enough for him to move."

People are most receptive to change when they've suffered trauma. The best teacher in life is pain. Foresight teaches softly, hindsight teaches painfully. You either learn from sheer pain and necessity or you repent. Repent means to change your mind, reconsider your path. Literally it means in sailing to turn around 180 degrees. But changing your mind is not so easy. Logic does not get you laid. In the same way you cannot reason a girl into bed, you cannot read enough factoids to get your life in order. What attracts women is the story you sell. If you are fun, confident and seem like you know where you are going in life, she imagines what her life would be like as part of your story. Your own mind is similar.  Why do you keep living the same old miserable story, refuse to move on? Better the devil you know. Just as it is hard to convince people around you that you’ve changed, it is more difficult to convince yourself. Why? Because you know yourself. Your soul, your essence and subconscious is convinced by results.

Start with small things, keep approaching women and your mind will accept that you are a man who is not afraid. Get your ass in shape and your mind will believe you can do great things. Start dressing better and be more social; your mind is paying attention. Keep wining and this becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Your mind wants a new story, but it needs some victories in order to believe. And lastly a story does not have to be factual in order for its message to be true. Begin writing that story by stacking small victories each day. What is that story? I don’t know, that’s for you to decide. Pursue your goals. If you stay complacent in the same place, I guess simping and settling in life, doesn’t hurt enough!  

Earnestly

The Most Alpha of Bunnies