Recently I was approached by a couple of young men at a burger joint close to the local church. I had spoken to some of them in times past, and had developed a reputation for shooting people straight. They began asking questions and picking my brain on relationship advice, from how to ask a girl out, to what to do on a date and even what to do once you are in a relationship. Me being the most Alpha of Bunnies put down my strawberry milkshake ,double cheeseburger and indulged them.

So I told them to ask girls out by inviting them to their lives, if you go hiking on Thursday invite her out to go with you; you are not doing anything different than usual, but extending an invitation to what you already do. If she declines then you still go hiking like usual. If the girl is not interested then shes not for you, if she is then great. This also means you have to have an interesting life I told them. Do the things you like and invite girls to your life; if you go shooting invite da girls you want to get with, and guys you want to be friends with to the party which is you. Concerning relationships I told them they must be the leader in the relationship, and this is done by setting the example not by pointing at scripture and saying" the Bible says you have to follow me." Know what you want in life and have her help you in pursuing your goals.

As I kept talking more young men gathered to listen and ask their own questions.

I just finished answering a few more questions when suddenly a wild white knight appeared. I recognized the guy as a youth elder at the local church, lets call him Kevin. Kevin overheard the conversation I was having with the young men and he said he had enough of what I was saying. He was listening in till it became too much and had to intervene before I lead them astray.

" Alpha Bunny! I feel very strongly about the topic of love and relationships, and I cannot in good conscience continue without saying something."

Well Kevin what is it I said you have a problem with?

Alpha Bunny, you spoke a lot about leadership and I think you miss the point. You are imposing your will upon other people. Did you ever stop to consider maybe what the girl wants? Why don't you ask her what she wants to do? We are not called to be leaders, we are called to be servant leaders.

Okay then, Why don't you tell me what you mean by servant leader?

Well then Alpha Bunny a man is supposed to be useful to his partner. A man is supposed to be willing to die for his partner; just like Christ did for the church. A man is supposed to lead not for the sake of oppression, but your servant leadership should be centered on doing the most good for your partner. Consider their wants and needs before your own. Be willing to work hard and communicate with your partner and seek their well being before your own. Submit to one another as in church. The way I understood what you were saying Alpha Bunny is that you come off as a tyrant. Even when you mentioned inviting your guy friends to go shooting, what if they dont want to go shooting? Did you consider that? Why not find something everyone wants to do instead? I dont know how far you are in your faith but you must remember that he who is greatest is he who serves the most.

Is that it Kevin?

Yeah that's about it for now. I could go on but I think you get the point.

Not sure I agree with everything you said and how you presented it Kevin, but you did not answer my question.

What do you mean?

Well, I asked what you meant by servant leader, so far you've told me much about serving but almost nothing about leadership.

Leadership? Sorry Alpha Bunny I dont see the difference.

Let me put it this way, who is the head of the household? who has the authority and guides a family or relationship? Also when you get married, you become Husband and Wife, not partners. A wife is supposed to honor her husband, and a husband to love his wife. But I get ahead of myself lets get back to a very simple application of leadership.

Who asks who out? Does a man ask a woman out, or a woman ask a man out?

Obviously the man asks the woman out Alpha Bunny, but he does not impose his will and force her to go out.

Not what I said but lets change tact for a bit. How do you ask girls out Kevin? What is your experience with talking to girls ,dating and relationships?

Oh, well I've never asked a girl out. Also I have never had a girlfriend.

...You are kidding right?

No, I am still waiting on the Lord.

You are 36 Kevin. You are telling me you have never asked a girl out? You have no experience to speak from yet somehow you have a problem with what I say?

Listen Alpha Bunny I might not have that much experience but I just know that what you are telling these young men is wrong, and I do not want to see them get lost in the world and in the lust of the flesh.. What you are teaching these men seems very worldly and not very spiritual. And I am sure the other elders here would agree.

Amen! cried a couple of elders.

Seeing their unbelief Alpha Bunny shook the dust of his clothes and waxed poetic.

Gentlemen you have ears to hear and eyes to see. Choose what you want to listen to. Shall you listen to Seignior Alpha Bunny who speaks from experience? Or shall you listen to Kevin and his band of white knights?

From there the camp was divided. Some young men went with Seignior Alpha Bunny where he taught them pragmatic ways. Others put their blinders back on and swore up and down to forsake the ways of the world and were convinced that God would send them a wife if they prayed hard enough, in God's timing of course.

Have any of you encountered such a thing before?

Why do Church leaders hate the idea of masculine leadership?

Why do they insist on putting men into an ideological plantation?