Advice on going out alone?

gbnz87 · 2018-11-04T07:31:41+00:00

Think about it, how often do you go to a bar and see a guy by himself and think “omg what a loner”

You don’t and that’s why it doesn’t really matter.

The only issue being by yourself is approaching women in groups can be quite difficult so you have to find the right time to strike. Once some groups of women notice you talking to others they are more accepting of you.

iamthespectator · 2018-11-04T08:49:00+00:00

Just fucking do it. Nobody gives a shit if you're alone. Going out alone can be much better than having a wing or group as well. Don't have to worry about the needs/actions of another person and you're free to do whatever the fuck you want. I've only went out solo like 6 times total but in those times I've made a couple friends, met a girl, and had a good time. And one of those friends is a 30 y.o. scrawny, short Asian dude who mostly goes out solo and has had better success than me because he gives less fucks and keeps accruing experience.

inspiredshane · 2018-11-04T10:22:29+00:00

I have SUCH a harder time meeting attractive women when I go out with friends. You can’t red pill everyone you hang out with, so it often feels like I have to do a ton of extra work babysitting their neuroses.

It can be nerve wracking when approaching a woman you’re super attracted to, but to have to do it while a friend watches you jealously and hovers just outside of the conversation is a whole extra ridiculous thing that I hate even exists.

So... the grass isn’t always greener, is my point.

Granite_Pill · 2018-11-05T03:20:09+00:00

When flying solo, approach anxiety is an existential crisis as much as it is a fear of failure. A big source of this approach anxiety stems from the fear that a woman will judge you as being a loser just because you're by yourself. The first obstacle you face is how to justify your existence in a social setting in a public space when you are all alone and don't know anyone. Fundamentally, if you cannot justify your own existence, if you cannot justify your own course of action, then you are not going to have any confidence in what you are doing. This lack of confidence will betray you and is very discernible to, not only women, but other men as well, and it reveals itself in a variety of different ways, both consciously and subconsciously. This is why the fake it til you make it meme, while cliche, is so true and important. Even if you lack social prowess and are scared to death, never reveal it. It is all an act and you are putting on a show.

Imagine if you were a door-to-door salesman in the days before the internet. You already know most people aren't even going to answer their doors, but if one person does answer the door, are you going to immediately feel the need to justify WHY you are going door to door? Are people going to question why you are going door to door by yourself? Are they going to wonder why you don't have any other salesmen with you?

"Can you believe what a loser this salesman is? He doesn't even have another salesman with him. He's just going door to door by himself like it's his job or something."

No, it didn't happen that way because door-to-door salesmen justified their existence by the simple act of just doing their jobs. You're perfectly justified being in a public space by yourself because public spaces are built for the express purpose of having people with a variety of different motives occupying them. Your existence is justified simply by your willingness to be there. You belong there so act like it.

unana1 · 2019-04-11T11:51:40+00:00

Most of us think that the ideal days to go out are Fridays, or Saturdays. However, this often means attracting a different demographic of clubbers, and young people who want to party. If you would rather like to go out and meet other people, I would recommend checking this article with tips on going out during the week!

Btw, atm a lot of millennials are shifting their lifestyle, as they believe 'going out sucks'. Interesting article, would not have expected something like this!

johnpayne10 · 2018-11-04T07:03:29+00:00

You are not rp yet. Rp yourself and your problem gets solved automatically.

Title	Advice on going out alone?
Author	cant__find__username
Upvotes	7
Comments	12
Date	November 4, 2018 6:17 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/9u1eac/advice_on_going_out_alone/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/advice-on-going-out-alone.53674 https://theredarchive.com/post/53674

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