We move through life with little control of our emotion and surrounding but within these parameters we are placed under we are able to make small decisions that affect us and those around us. Our emotions and feelings are not something to be afraid of or to shy away from. We are ultimately the masters of ourselves and we have control over how act and feel. Our brains are very good at following the same synaptic routes which means we often get into a spiral of negativity as for a lot of people they have a negative mindset brought upon by the primal part of our brain creating the worst case scenario. It is very easy to listen to this part of our brain and fall further and further into a negative spiral where we start to see small acts of affection as temporary relief from the depression we feel. We close ourselves up and put up a guard in the hopes of no one seeing the vulnerable, weak and scared person we truly are. Once you come to accept that you are no different to any other person that is living on this planet can you move forward with your life. Your looks, colour, creed, culture, religion, height, weight make no difference. We all bleed red, we are all ultimately scared and vulnerable and weak.

Letting people in to see the real you is one of the hardest challenges we face. With the prominence of pornography and the media we all start to develop a complex that we are not good enough. We are not good enough to get this girl, go for this job, have a good lifestyle, not good enough in bed and in some drastic cases not good enough to even live. But every person out there is good enough to do whatever they want. You can be the best you if you really want it. If you keep a positive mindset and don’t get wound up in that negative spiral you can move forwards and upwards. Life is not easy, we are not handed everything we desire on a platter. We have to work for it. No one of success has got there with 100% success. No one. The more successful the person the more they have been rejected. Rejection is one of lifes bee stings that you simply have to accept. The more times you are rejected the easier it gets. The more you accept rejection as a positive move as opposed to a negative the easier your life will become. Rejection only means you are 1 step closer to success. Say i said to you that tonight you are going to be rejected by 9 women but the 10th woman is going to a HB10 and the women of your dreams. You would without a shadow of a doubt go and happily get rejected by those 9 women as you knew there was going to be a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Life is like this except we cannot see into the future. It is a mysterious fog that we cannot see into. Imagine you could see your whole life now, life would become boring as there would be no surprise. So we must keep a positive outlook on life and realise that it our lives to lead. We are who we are. This is our reality and we have the ability to shape it. Yes we are placed under the parameters of society, of our looks, of our upbringing but from this point onwards we decide who we want to be.

Emulation and copying are the quickest routes to becoming the person we want to be. Neil Strauss talks about ‘the naturals’ the guys who have it easy with girls, at the click of their fingers they can have any girl they want with seemingly no effort. Find the guy you want to be and copy everything he does. Learn his body language, his voice, his style, his approach, his kiss close, his daygame. everything. Once you lay the groundwork then you can use this and build upon it. It is how humans have evolved. We learn and then add.

There is no quick route to happiness. We all have a gap in our lives which we want to be filled. For some people success brings this, others it’s the affection of 100’s of women, others its religion. Happiness cannot be found overnight. It takes years of attitude change, positive experience, understanding and learning to become ‘happy’. There is no strict definition of happiness but I see it as the state in which you are whole, time is no issue, you are in flow, there is not one morsel of negative energy in your body. We all have a finite time on this finite planet. We are all going to die. The truth is, is that most of us will die and not be remembered 100 years from now. No one will have any recollection of us. You could look at this in a negative way as we are conditioned to do so. No one will remember you. You could of course use your new positive outlook on life and see it like this, all the stupid, embarrassing shit we do won’t be remembered. All those rejections, all those cold shoulders, all the bad shit we do will be forgotten. You have to live in the moment. Fuck thoughts and the part of our brain that tells us we are not good enough. You have to act and make it count. No regrets. No thoughts. Only success.

It’s a strange moment of peacefulness after rejection. You accept their decision, you move on and you know. There is no ‘if only’ or ‘i wonder’. I would rather be rejected by 1,000 women rather than have those thoughts. Those thoughts eat away into your soul and suck the life out of you. Life is ultimately a numbers game. The more you practice the luckier you get. The more women you approach the more women you will get. Start small. Aim for 1 minute interactions then go. Don’t worry that your going to to have to have a deep conversation with a girl you just met. Baby steps. You cannot learn a few approaches, a few cold reads and expect to be the next pua master. Like any exercise their has to be progression. You think that skinny kid who is now ripped was lifting 180 on the bar off the bat. no. He started small and worked his way up, pushing himself every session to improve. Each time you go out you have to go harder than you did last time. More girls, better looking girls, more variation, more daring approaches. Often guys get bogged down in the inner working of different schools of thought. Always remember why you started this, to have fun and improve yourself. Never lose sight of that. Never doubt yourself, you are the biggest barrier you have to overcome as you know every single weakness about yourself. Once you overcome yourself nothing will seem like a challenge. You can put on any act, be anyone you want to be and no one knows. Act confident, guess what? people think you're confident. Lie and deceive yourself until you are no longer lying. You will become better, stronger, happier if you keep moving forward and progressing. No more excuses, no more old routines, no more the old you. It won’t be easy but when you look back in 1 week, 1 month, 1 year you will laugh at the person you are today and smile as you know the incredible journey you are about to take.

Allure