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WhySoOverHeated Archive

View 2 posts and 132 comments by WhySoOverHeated on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
20

DISCUSSIONWhySoOverHeated/r/RedPillWomen26/01/18 01:38 PM
13

RELATIONSHIPSWhySoOverHeated/r/RedPillWomen06/10/19 09:23 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

It looks like it so far, I hope it continues! He has tried listening in the past couple of days.
/r/RedPillWomen08/10/19 03:13 PM
1

My heart is broken because I want to be his rock and the one he turns to when he is going through a hard time, but he dissociates and completely shuts me out instead of seeking me for safety. I can relate to this so much! My boyfriend is a veteran too.. I'm so sorry you had to go through this.
/r/RedPillWomen07/10/19 06:44 PM
1

Help him get professional help I did, he started. It seems like he has the wish to change, but doesn't know how.. I am unsure how to support him without being domineering (and without acting like a psychologist), especially now my patience is running out..
/r/RedPillWomen07/10/19 06:37 PM
1

For me, a man gets one chance to speak disrespectfully to me. I have a zero tolerance policy. I immediately remove myself physically. Say "it sounds like I should go". And leave immediately. Come back later. If he doesn't apologize, plan your exit strategy. If it happens again, plan your exit strategy. I think this is really important if the guy is a bad guy in general, and is generally disrespectful. Fortunately it seems like my boyfriend only get like this when I trigger his past somehow.. Not…
/r/RedPillWomen07/10/19 06:34 PM
1

I feel like it's only really possible to submit to a man who is strong and steady-like a rock. You can only submit to someone that you can trust not to hurt you and it doesn't sound like this is the case here Yes, I am not submitting at all at the moment, and it is terrible for both of us. he has made you his punching bag This is exactly how I feel. And I find it so frustrating because I really REALLY want to be the exact opposite! And of course I can't stand getting hurt again and again in the …
/r/RedPillWomen07/10/19 06:29 PM
2

Thank you SO much for this reply, I really appreciate every bit of it. Ill try to accept that I can't control weather he wants to change, and I can't control what he wants my part to be in this journey. I definitely believe he has trauma. His brain seems to shut down whenever I mention a problem between us. Of course it is not an excuse, but a reason, which makes it easier for me to understand everything. ​ He’ll need to want to change his behaviors on his own after finding out his real inner is…
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/19 03:20 PM
3

Our dissatisfaction brings them deep shame, but they’re unable to confront it and instead lash out or avoid instead. I believe so too! Try bringing up the communication issue in isolation from any other issue. Good idea, I'll try that, I think I bring up way too many themes at a time and overwhelm him. Ask him to tell you what his understanding of the problem is, and how he plans to contribute to fixing it. I haven't tried that, thanks so much for the advice! Maybe introduce him to John Gottman’…
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/19 03:08 PM
2

He does sound alot like the drunk captain - It seems like he numbs himself! I wish he didn't have to do that with me, I wish I could create a safe space for him, and he could do the same for me.
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/19 02:59 PM
1

I agree. This morning he told me he wants to start therapy again. I don't know what I should do no, how should I support him, how should I handle conflict..
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/19 02:55 PM
2

tell him that you love him and that he needs to realise that when you confront him on subjects or problems then it is you showing that love, showing that you are willing to work through the pain to be with him. But you cannot carry that burden alone, you need his help and his trust that it is a burden that can be carried and can lead to a place of joy and security. I'll definitely try to mention this more to him, thank you! Tell him that you're willing to work through this, if he is. If not then…
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/19 02:53 PM
1

This makes so much sense to me. Thanks. He decided this morning to continue with therapy, said he would call his psychologist monday. It seems like he really wants to work on things, I really don't know how to support him in the mean time. It might take a long time..
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/19 02:49 PM
3

All the advice in the world isn’t going to change him and moving in with him only reenforced his behavior. I am afraid so.. Thanks for your perspective.
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/19 02:47 PM
1

Thanks for your respond. I'm more afraid that he expects me to lead, in this area, with his passive approach that is unlike him. Usually he makes fine decisions, like contacting the psychologist with his problems or good carrier decisions. He is good at deciding what to do when we are out in nature, he keeps me warm and finds places that works for both of us, and so on. It just seems like his brain shuts off when we have problems in our relationship. I haven't read about drunk captain before, I'…
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/19 10:23 AM
3

Same here, from Denmark. I think there are very few RPW in Europe, but it makes me happy knowing there are at least some! 👏 I do have one friend with similar thoughts whom I met through the danish BDSM community which has been the only place where I've felt comfortable sharing my thought of being submissive in my relationship. I think RP thinking for women is very taboo in Denmark.
/r/RedPillWomen06/08/19 06:44 PM
2

That is good humour, haha!
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/18 02:45 PM
2

This is a great post, thank you so much for your words.
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/18 08:02 PM
1

That is brilliant. Saved your whole post in my quote collection haha. Thanks so much!
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/18 02:31 PM
6

This is amazing!! I was worried that the sidebar would be "forgotten" in the redesign, but wow, you guys are doing a great job and I am so excited!! 👏😍
/r/RedPillWomen16/07/18 09:44 PM
6

Hi, I imagine what you are going through is really tough ATM. So I'm just going to throw out all the ideas I can think of from my own personal experience (I have some psychological issues that means that my brain is a bit glitchy somehow and I can't remember people very well when I can't see them physically. This causes my brain to think people are dead after a couple of days of separation, and I start a grieving process.) I don't know the following will work for you, but I hope to inspire and y…
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/18 08:24 AM
1

Great Idea! I will tell my partner about it, maybe he likes it :) Thanks so much!
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/18 03:06 PM
2

What you explain you tried to avoid is exactly what happened between me and my partner yesterday. My partner and I ended up having a really bad argument for the first time because I brought up 'my wants' in a conversation where he was sharing his needs as well. It was incredibly bad timing as it made him feel attacked and unheard (it seems) and he firmly said "no" to my want. We completely misunderstood eachother. His respond to my "attack" made me feel so hurt, that I started shouting. Oh my th…
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/18 10:50 AM
1

I love how your formulated this, it was interesting and fun to read! And thanks for the advice, will surely do something on my own these next days, to have something nice to tell him about, that isn't school or work :)
/r/RedPillWomen21/03/18 05:46 AM
1

That is a great idea!
/r/RedPillWomen21/03/18 05:36 AM
1

That makes sense. Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 10:18 AM
2

Just for curiosity: are contributions related to posts only, or comments as well? :)
/r/RedPillWomen27/02/18 05:27 AM
1

Hi! No, sorry, the mods of the sub didn't approve, so I closed the project down.
/r/RedPillWomen18/02/18 12:52 PM
2

Yay, welcome to /u/pearlsandstilettos! :)
/r/RedPillWomen16/02/18 01:58 PM
2

Not sure why this is getting downvoted. I liked reading your perspective - polygamy is very unusual where I live (cheating is more usual and even less frawned upon than polygamy, sadly!), so I found it interesting to read why you married not one but two women. Thanks for sharing! I hope people will throw in a comment on this.
/r/RedPillWomen16/02/18 01:49 PM
5

Care to elaborate on that question?
/r/RedPillWomen11/02/18 02:44 PM
3

Thanks for sharing this. I find it SO hard to STFU, but your story reminds me why I have too. Not just in my relationship with my partner, but with others as well. The past couple of years I have been less and less outlashing and it has seemed to improve several relationships (mom, dad, sister). But I am really not near the goal yet. If I feel mistreated by others I start an emotional loop and loose all assertiveness and will eventually start yelling. That doesn't exactly make me a person people…
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/18 06:55 AM
2

I will let you know :)
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/18 11:43 AM
1

Oh! I just found out the post have been removed within the hour. I am not sure why. I hope the mods will get back to me soon.
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/18 10:04 AM
1

Yes :) The server is open now. Follow the 6 steps above in the post. Make sure you also read the part about personal security as well, to prevent doxing.
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/18 09:51 AM
1

It is possible to make a specifik 18+/NSFW channel on the server. I'll make it right away. It is not really possible to make sure, that those who participate in the discussion are actually above 18, since I can't see people's age anywhere, and they might have put in a fake birthday date anyway. But hopefully it will filter a little bit.
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/18 07:44 AM
1

Thanks for the comment! I will look into it, and see if I can figure out a solution.
/r/RedPillWomen29/01/18 10:32 PM
1

They are automatically assigned when you create your Discord user. If you log in and klick on your profile picture you will be able to see your tag next to your username. You can also see it in your user settings. I hope this makes sense. :)
/r/RedPillWomen27/01/18 07:38 AM
1

Would you like me to elaborate on something?
/r/RedPillWomen26/01/18 02:59 PM
3

Of course! It is just an option for those who want to use Discord for chatting with other RPW-redditors instead of IRC, a Facebook group, Pinterest... :)
/r/RedPillWomen26/01/18 02:22 PM
1

Made a new post about it here
/r/RedPillWomen26/01/18 01:52 PM
3

Haha this cracked me up!
/r/RedPillWomen18/01/18 04:33 PM
1

I just want to update and let people know that I'm looking into the possibilities ATM.
/r/RedPillWomen18/01/18 01:00 PM
1

Ooh I love this advice, thank you so much!
/r/RedPillWomen16/01/18 05:56 AM
3

I think this post is not much appreciated because it is primarily about what you need/want and what he gives you, not about how you are being first officer and how you do things for him. It seems very 'topping from the bottom'. It's beautiful you wear his collar, but the post in it self is not very red pill'y, and I am not sure what to take from it.. My personal opinion.
/r/RedPillWomen15/01/18 04:48 PM
1

I think this advice is really great! In combination with working with the reasons to your self esteem.
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/18 08:40 PM
2

Northern part of Europe. I agree with you. Personally I haven't really noticed many couples my age with any role in their relationship at all that was different from their partners' role. It seems dysfunctional, especially when one partner is yelling at the other to do something because they don't want to be doing it them selves all the time (just some of the time.), expecting the other person to know when they want to do the thing and when they want the other person to do the thing. Of course t…
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/18 04:17 PM
1

I would like to help set it up :)
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/18 03:23 PM
2

I did find it very liberating yes, because: 1) I understood my problem a lot better, and 2) RPW gave me some control over the situation. I honestly feel very hopeless, frustrated, bored and depressed when I don't have any personal thing to work on, especially with a problem so huge that it affects my relationships. That feeling of being able to do nothing.. juck. RPW has been my tool - and gave me the critique and honesty I needed in order to wake up. Which I think a lot of women here can probab…
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 05:55 PM
2

When do you experience the "P-A" part coming into play? I am ENTJ-T ("the commander") and am wondering what the "P-A" is like? :)
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 01:14 PM
2

Oh it does make sense, thank you, I like that perspective a lot better haha. Actually my ex boyfriend was really into TRP and showed me the subreddit. I read some of the rage-posts and got really angry with their view on women, because I thought AWALT meant that we women had no choice but to be shrews, and I criticised him for his belief in TRP (oh boy was that a bad idea in so many ways). A year after this, when I got desperate as the relationship was falling apart, I looked into TRP again and …
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 12:48 PM
2

The test says: "confidence, and project authority in a way that draws crowds together behind a common goal" I also think I am quite arrogant: I don't like other people telling me what to do, and I don't usually trust other people's abilities. Also: "They also have a particular skill in calling out others’ failures with a chilling degree of insensitivity". This has caused me some problems, because I have seen critique as a way of growth, and I don't take critique very personally myself (I think) …
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/18 07:05 AM
2

ENTJ-T. The "commander". No wonder I have to practice so much to STFU and be submissive in my relationship :)
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/18 03:30 PM
4

I haven't tried Discord before, but I agree, the IRC channel seems outdated, and would like to try Discord if others are in on it :)
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/18 09:56 AM
1

(Did I post this the wrong place?)
/r/RedPillWomen04/12/17 05:14 PM
0

Lovely job! I am missing the "External Resources Megalist" thread though. Or "The (un)Official RPW Reading List". Maybe it would also be relevant with a link to the most basic TRP theory that includes some of the evolutionary psychology which it is based on?
/r/RedPillWomen02/12/17 02:53 PM
1

I feel that I need to re-establish that between us I guess Is it that you don't respect your man? Or that you don't know how to show him respect? If it is the latter I recommend this post: The 7 habits of a highly effective shrew. Personally I also learned a lot about showing respect/being respectful from Laura Doyle's The Surrendered Wife and from Dale Carnegie's How To Win Friends and Influence People.
/r/RedPillWomen04/11/17 07:41 AM
1

Consider starting with 1 problem at a time. Wanting to fix "everything" at once will be too overwhelming. Maybe tell us more about what you find most important to start with? :-)
/r/RedPillWomen02/11/17 01:55 PM
3

There is a difference between being able to understand words you are reading and being able to recognize yourself and your own behavior in an actual situation and applying the wisdom from what you have read. The latter is way, way more difficult. Sometimes we therefore have to make our own mistakes to learn from them. OP is trying to learn.
/r/RedPillWomen30/10/17 04:48 PM
8

Hi everyone! Subscribed when my previous relationship was having problems. Found out that I haven't done any vetting, and that I was a complete shrew. Have been reading the books recommended here and on TRP, and it has changed my life. Even though I am single I am happier than ever, because I take care of myself first and my life has a goal: to become the best person, friend, woman, wife and mother that I can. Just met an amazing guy and trying to apply RPW-principles for the first time. Scared …
/r/RedPillWomen30/10/17 05:01 AM
5

With the same attitude you are showing now: starting with judgement instead of starting with genuine curiosity. What is logical to you might not (obviously isn't) necissarily logical for someone else. All people are enormously complex, and if we really want to understand each other we will have to try to imagine ourselves in their shoes. OP maybe couldn't see the outcome of her actions because maybe she wasn't aware of an alternative way of handling the situation and did not fully understand the…
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/17 08:01 PM
13

When you apologise I think it could be a good idea to explain to him in your own words why you believe he deserves the apology. Tell him what you have learned. And ask him what he thinks about what you said in your apology: do you understand him correctly, are you on the same page now or is there something more to the situation that you haven't grasped yet? His trust has been somewhat broken with you, so to rebuild it he has to know that you have evolved and learned. Just saying the words "I'm s…
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/17 05:39 AM
6

I am just going to write down everything that comes to my mind. I don't know you, but maybe you can use some of it. I just read this yesterday, by Mark Manson (he wrote Models and The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F***) Comments in this post and in this post helped me alot after my breakup. Also a couple of things I will recommend to build yourself up again: Focus on self care. Improve yourself (which you are obviously trying to), spend time on your hobbies, goals.. You will probably have some extr…
/r/RedPillWomen26/10/17 05:14 AM
2

I second that!
/r/RedPillWomen23/10/17 01:33 PM
2

If he asks you what you like about the robe you can just be honest and tell him that it reminds you that he wants to make you happy. And thank him for that. From my perspective you don't have to even like the robe or even use it. You don't have to fake anything. If he gets sad that you don't use the robe he probably has to work on his metric for success? Besides, if he believes he got you a robe he believes will make you happy I don't see a problem there - his intention is pure. No material gift…
/r/RedPillWomen20/10/17 01:30 PM
1

("Ouch" is from Laura Doyle's The Surrendered Wife, if interested)
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/17 01:37 PM
2

Thanks for posting! I enjoyed reding your perspective, and what an interesting discussion that was opened up!
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/17 01:16 PM
2

Nice job, and good luck with the future-planning :)!
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/17 06:48 AM
–

Nail polish! Wear a dress Sing Cleaning, cooking, baking or meal prepping gives me a feminine boost and also a feeling of victory, because I have been productive and taking care of myself and my home, though I was feeling down. Do something good for someone else - give a compliment, help someone.. Dance, do yoga.. Try to walk with a nice posture
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/17 10:32 AM
3

Point on! I hope OP reads your comment.
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/17 08:40 AM
1

I agree, an anterior pelvic tilt to some degree is perfectly normal, and not a bad thing unless it causes problems. It's even included in the four types of postural alignment in Muscles Testing and Function (by Kendall, McCreary, Provance, Rodgers, Romani, fifth edition page 64 to those geeks like me out there), though the ideal body type (when it comes to being ergonomic) doesn't have much of a visual tilt. Point is: don't worry about your posture being "bad" in terms of health if you have a pe…
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/17 08:17 AM
3

Red-Curious and ivegotsomequestions0 you blew my mind. Thanks for your comments, I now understand my previous relationship so much better, and why it ended. So I really agree with you two.
/r/RedPillWomen04/08/17 10:05 AM
3

Ohhh I'd love this too! :D got me all excited
/r/RedPillWomen26/07/17 02:40 PM
12

You are standing at the edge of an ocd infested cliff, spill over the ledge and watch your relationship devolve into endless nagging and resentment please find some perspective because you need it badly. Point on! Showering twice a day is more than what is needed in terms of basic hygiene, as far as I know. (I used to shower twice a day too, using soap both times, but it actually made my skin so dry that I had issues with it; eczema, skin splitting.. I know this is not related to your question O…
/r/RedPillWomen18/07/17 08:24 AM
2

(Just wanted to mention that your explanation/advice already helped me a lot! Now it seems so simple, but I just didn't get it until you wrote it out haha, so thanks you! :))
/r/RedPillWomen11/07/17 06:34 PM
2

If you want the freedom of not restricting yourself to a diet (counting calories, measuring everything, remembering what you are "allowed" to eat...), try "simply" eating a lot more vegetables. You will then naturally eat less of everything else. Vegetables are low on calories (macronutrients), and they contain a lot of water, fibres, and most importantly a lot of micronutrients (vitamins, minerals, antioxidants) so your body can keep functioning properly. It will probably feel empty in your sto…
/r/RedPillWomen11/07/17 05:50 PM
1

At my school (I study physiotherapy) we use ExorLive for exercise inspiration. It's a great site, you can even make your own programs. It is not free :-( Though it's possible to try it for free for a period of time, if you feel like it. And just a minor tip to those who want to work on 'flat abs', because most people I see don't know this: Make sure you actually use your abs and NOT your hip flexors.. You do not have to bend in your hip when you are training your abs (though tightening up for st…
/r/RedPillWomen11/07/17 05:10 PM
4

I second this as a physiotherapy student (and doing weight lifting myself, and love my perky butt :-)).
/r/RedPillWomen11/07/17 04:40 PM
2

You can't ever blame one person for things like that (since everything that happens is the result of everything that has ever happened before that moment) and therefore you can not just blame everyone but yourself. Try to find comfort in the fact that you as well have had a part to play in it, and therefore you have the power to prevent it from happening again. Besides; the only thing you actually CAN change is yourself. So forget about everyone else's mistakes, or it will just make you bitter a…
/r/RedPillWomen08/07/17 06:18 PM
1

Ooh, that "Power of Words" challenge sounds interesting! I would love to hear your opinion/experience with it, and how it worked out for you, after the month. :)
/r/RedPillWomen08/07/17 06:00 PM
2

Wauw yeah, he is amazing! I have been binge watching youtube videos of him for the past 8 days now :D
/r/RedPillWomen08/07/17 05:37 PM
1

Did this happen? :)
/r/RedPillWomen24/06/17 01:52 PM
2

Thank your for explaining so well, I get it now I think!
/r/RedPillWomen19/06/17 03:36 PM
3

I think this post might give you some helpfull advice as well, if you haven't already read it :)
/r/RedPillWomen18/06/17 10:28 AM
4

I love how he explains the healthy part of challenges in relationships. I loved this! Thanks for sharing. It gave me a good laugh as well at the end: "You don't want someone who thinks you're perfect in your current form partly because why would you want to go out with someone that deluted!?". Haha, amazing. But is this just from a female perspective? Or will we women also bore our man if we compliment him too much?? I never thought about this before, and I can't unite this idea with RPW theory.…
/r/RedPillWomen18/06/17 10:23 AM
2

I don't know, perhaps. He recommended it to me when I said I wanted to learn about what men liked in a LTR and how to satisfy a man. I hoped someone here would maybe recognise the name of the book and pitch in, if anyone here has read it. But if you don't like TRP and don't find their perspective interesting I wouldn't take the chance of buying the book. :) Sorry if I just confused by commenting!
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/17 02:09 PM
2

How about The Evolution of Desire? (https://www.amazon.com/Evolution-Desire-Strategies-Human-Mating/dp/046500802X) I haven't read it, but my ex boyfriend recommended it, and he found it on TRP
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/17 01:45 PM
1

It is not about whether the man is insecure. It about how you can be the best version of yourself as possible in order to be the best possible woman (in the eyes of RP) and this means acting respectfully towards your man by validating him (instead of possibly the opposite by offering him information he hasn't asked for, for example). If it makes sense.
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/17 05:07 PM
1

If I'm the one who came up with the best solution, that just makes me more valuable to his eyes. If you believe so, I wouldn't ask help in such a case. If that makes sense. I would just deal with it myself. Asking for help and then offering him information (if he hasn't asked for it) would be unrepectful?
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/17 04:58 PM
3

That information is life-saving. I like to keep my man informed, so he can make good decisions If you asked me 2 months ago I would have agreed with you completely. And then I found RPW and open Laura Doyle's The Surrendered Wife. (But without knowing I had already lost my amazing boyfriend at the time. #LearnedMyLesson) I just want to add that if it is in the matter of life and death I would most likely still sacrifice the intimacy of my relationship as well if I didn't have faith that my man c…
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/17 04:39 PM
4

Contributing to the relationship ("pulling your own weight") doesn't mean controlling the relationship I agree with you there. But receiving from you man when you asked for his help will make him feel masculine, make you feel more feminine and submissive, boost intimacy, and it will allow him to have a role to play in your life. I also see this as as contribution to the relationship. I think it is an important detail whether you plan to "help" your man help you by giving him information, or whet…
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/17 04:13 PM
4

In a team there will be a leader and the rest will follow. The question is; do you want to be the leader, or would you rather have your knight/man play this part? Are you really surrendering if you only surrender when it comes to things you find of little importance? I'd say no.
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/17 02:05 PM
3

inform the knight how the dragon can be killed efficiently If you have already decided the knight needs your help, you have already determined that you are more competent than him. This is not surrendering nor trust nor faith, this is fear or control. In this moment you prioritise the outcome of the situation above the trust between yourself and your knight/man, and there will be no room for intimacy. It is especially when you are vulnerable eg. Trapped with a dragon that faith is a challenge.
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/17 02:02 PM
2

I would also like to thank your past self, and your present self, for this reminder :D I think I have totally misunderstood everything when it comes to attraction until just this moment.
/r/RedPillWomen10/06/17 09:02 PM
1

Still working on last month's goals; but this month I will try to read less here on RPW and try to spend more energy on self care than on learning how to RPW in general, and therefore I won't participate much in this thread this month. So, added to last month's list: Try to only look at RPW twice a day tops
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/17 05:23 AM
1

Have you decided? :-) Is pinterest a no-go as well?
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/17 09:55 AM
3

I think that I am quite masculine in the ways I feel and think What makes you feel that you are masculine? I think this is essential when considering what you want to work on. Maybe this is why you feel fake when wearing a dress; as if your outside doesn't match the way you perceive your own personality? I can never FEEL like a beauty. And because I don't FEEL like a beauty I often neglect my appearance, because what's the point. What makes you not feel like a beauty when you say you can be a 6-…
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/17 06:23 PM
3

Physical touch is such a healthy thing to the body, I know it releases oxytocin which also happens during sex. So definitely give it a shot. It is very likely that it will feel a little weird to begin with, and It might even feel awkward. But keep in mind that it might be because you are being vulnerable and because you are moving your own personal boundaries and not necissarily the other person's boundaries. From my personal experience and from studying fysiotherapy it seems that most people re…
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/17 01:31 PM
14

I try to think about what it is about sex that I miss in that specific moment. Is it because I feel lonely? Then I call up a friend or do something social. Is it because I miss the feeling of someone touching me? I try to hug people more (I generally hug people I know all the time, for no reason besides that I had a sudden urge, and people seem to like it and think I am cute for it, so this is like a win-win for me). Is it because I miss the feeling of someone wanting to have sex with me? Then I…
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/17 04:34 AM
12

Wauw, you girls blew my mind. It didn't occur to me until now how big a difference there is from vetting and being married! I wish there were more sidebar info on this- I feel like your posts have just saved me from a future heartbreak.. Thanks girls, and thanks for sharing AbsoluteSaint! I feel you, and am sorry you had this experience..I can really relate to your experience, and I think the above comments are really valuable. I have just bought Laura Doyle's The Surrendered Single. Has anyone …
/r/RedPillWomen26/05/17 07:34 PM
1

Oh I see! I think I understand your point of view now :-) Thank you for elaborating. "The latter group wouldn't take the wheel if their current leader does things in the exact same way as they would do" No one will ever do things the exact same way, but if they did, I think my pre-RPW-brain would have been unable to cope with the "what if"s, and listening to my anxiety I would have taken leadership like so many times before, but really felt horrible doing so :( So I strongly agree on not pointin…
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/17 12:41 PM
2

I somewhat agree. But wanting to optimize everything including your husbands way, isn't that also a way of trying to control the outcome? And we are back to the desire for control. I don't think there necessarily is a "problem" with wanting to optimize everything and having a lot of standards as long as you limit this control behavior to yourself (unless it is making yourself unhappy of course), and trust your husbands way, even though you can point out a thousand flaws or imperfections that COU…
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/17 10:58 AM
1

Sorry to hear you had to experience that. Personally I hahe never had such an experience in my life at all! I am actually kind of surprised that it happens as often as it seems to do here on RPW and TRP. I honestly never care myself what other people think/believe in/do in their spare time, as long as they don't hurt other people in any way (against their will, if ya' know what I'm saying). I find it hard to understand why so many people seem to care about things they can not change or things th…
/r/RedPillWomen23/05/17 05:27 AM
2

Good idea :-) They don't have it in my area though. Not a single book by Lori Gottlieb (Maybe because of the country I am from). I appericiate it though.
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/17 03:48 PM
2

Thank you so much! It makes sense. I wrote the book down when I found your recommendation earlier, but haven't bought the book yet, but I definetly will. Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/17 01:37 PM
3

I see! Thank you for elaborating :-)
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/17 11:22 AM
2

This is great! Thank you for sharing, I really need to work on this. I can't figure out how important it is to be attracted to a man physically. May I ask; were and are you attracted to your man's looks, or is it something that didn't matter at all as he had the traits you mentioned above? Are looks something that we shouldn't prioritise as women, if we want "captain-material" in a guy? (I found it hard to put this down in words without making it sound offencive, but I hope the questions make se…
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/17 04:08 AM
1

I agree :-)! Thanks for wanting to organise it MsSadie.
/r/RedPillWomen20/05/17 05:15 AM
1

I second this. My friend is a member of a bdsm group on Facebook, which is secret, and it doesn't show up anywhere, unless you get invited by a member.
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/17 12:01 PM
1

Just below the white text box in where you write your post/comment there is a little blue link: "formatting help", and if you click it, a little useful helplist will unfold (without leaving the page/deleting your comment and so on).
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/17 04:18 AM
3

This is cute, I like it.
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/17 04:12 AM
3

Ohhh I would love this SO much! I'm in!! And yes, if we don't want to get doxxed, we probably shouldn't enter the group with: "HI! I am WhySoOverHeated on Reddit♡♡" :-D
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/17 04:09 AM
1

That would be so great!
/r/RedPillWomen16/05/17 04:18 AM
1

I like your Skype idea too, especially because RPW are spread all over the world and some might not be able to meet up. But it would be so amazing to have meetups too!
/r/RedPillWomen16/05/17 04:17 AM
1

Welcome! Thank you for sharing.
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/17 06:03 AM
2

Interesting prespective! I feel it's brain candy I will chew on for a while :-) I hoped you would write this :-) Thanks for sharing.
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/17 05:52 AM
1

Update: I completely lost my motivation for studying, and my number 4) has taken over everything else! Am starting to feel really unbalanced as my priorities have changed since discovering RPW about a month ago.. Time spend on studying suddenly feels like a waste of time, as I am not sure how or whether it will make me a better RPW? Any advice?? Those of you who also have studying on their monthly goal: What is your motivation?
/r/RedPillWomen13/05/17 07:29 AM
1

Maybe there is another way of feeling gratitude then, thank feeling like you have something you don't deserve, such as feeling lucky, or enjoying your freedom or appericiating your surroundings, and so on? I don't know.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/17 04:23 AM
2

Thanks for commenting! I see your point! I have the idea that happiness is a a kind of good feeling in your stomach, mind and body, and I see this "fulfilment and satisfaction" as an easy way to achieve this, but maybe this makes the achieved feeling of happiness more fragile and "superficial" as it is not a constant thing in the same way as you describe happiness.
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/17 07:45 PM
3

I really enjoyed reading your perspective, and it inspired me to make a comment as well as I think we have a little bit of a different view on thinks. So thanks for sharing. If you read my comment I would really like to hear your opinion about it! :)
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/17 07:19 PM
3

Honestly, I do believe this is a topic where many people will have a different view on things. Personally I disagree with gratitude = happiness since I have never put energy into trying to be grateful at all (It is on my list of goals to focus on though) because I have always mixed the feeling of gratitude with the feeling of shame, due to what loneliness-inc wrote about: When you are the recipient of something you don't deserve. And I find happiness elsewhere. To me, happines is when being in a…
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/17 07:06 PM
7

If he is turned on, be happy - he is just a healthy man ;-) Remember that even if your man is turned on by other women, this does not necissarily make you less attractive in his eyes! Men do not become blind just because they are in love, and the fact that another girl is beautiful/hot does not take any of your beauty/hotness away. We have a saying that it's OK to "go out and build appetite as long as you eat at home" or something like that. I don't know if this is RP. But you can't battle again…
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/17 07:04 PM
2

Way to go! 💪
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/17 08:54 AM
3

The Surrendered Wife, by Laura Doyle The Surrendered Single, by Laura Doyle First Kill All The Marriage Counselors, by Laura Doyle Fascinating Womanhood, by Helen Andelin Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, by John Gray Secrets of Fascinating Womanhood Why Men Love Bitches Oh, and i forgot the number 8 I also ordered: How to Win Friends and Influence people, by Dale Carnegie And I really want these in the future: The Propee Care and Feeding of Husbands, Dr. Laura Schlessinger Getting to 'I …
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/17 06:12 AM
1

I haven't read any RPW related about gratitude yet so please correct me if I'm wrong, but in my perspective sometimes you can want several things simultaneously and that doesn't make you ungrateful for one or the other. Maybe your situation wouldn't have been a dilemma if you were not grateful for your job. The decision wouldn't even have been a real decision if there weren't any pros and cons on both sides. I think the real core of the dilemma here is for you to figure out what will make you th…
/r/RedPillWomen04/05/17 07:03 PM
1

Great quotes! I have stopped watching series - I am so scared I'll get brainwashed by BP way of thinking, and loose myself, or get angry/sad.. How do you girls handle it when you stumble upon very BP stuff?
/r/RedPillWomen04/05/17 04:12 PM
1

Thank you for the recommendation! I'm happy to hear you had such a good experience with it. I added the book to my reading list now.
/r/RedPillWomen03/05/17 05:11 PM
3

I agree withLuckyLittleStar! Maybe some smaller part-goals could help you on the way as a more specific plan to reaching your goal to "get over him". E.g. maybe find something to replace the time you used to spend with him, some things that cheer you up, or have a part-goal such as not looking at pictures of him? (or what ever fits you and your situation the best. I don't know if these ideas are relevant to you, I just hoped to come up with some inspiration) :) Good luck
/r/RedPillWomen03/05/17 04:54 AM
3

So inspiring! I am going to copy your idea with a gratitude journal some day, I think. What a great idea to remember the good stuff. And I love your ideas with self-care and health & wellness. I would never have thought of those myself, though it is so important to do things that make yourself happy. Thank you for sharing, and good luck.
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/17 04:07 PM
3

I get you there, I have done exctly the same, but I have had to pause this goal unill in a couple og months... I found some great stuff on Pinterest, Etsy and Instagram. The search function on Pinterest and Instagram makes it hard to narrow down the search to only small apartments, but I still managed to find a lot of things for inspiration so maybe these could inspire you too. Oh, and some ideas I want to do myself: put up pictures with my favourite quotes have shelves on which I can use my fav…
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/17 09:31 AM
5

Thank you so much! If anyone has any advice/criticism or anything I am very open to hear. Thank you :-)
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/17 09:16 AM
12

I tried to prioritize my goals, so that when I have spare time after school I start working on goal number 1 and then when this one is satisfied that day I continue to number 2 and so on.. 1) Learn to fulfill my needs without a man/LTR/Sex: Keep working out Maintain your home-routine with cleaning/cooking.. Use time on other relationships Spend more time with friends and family. Try to see someone twice a week Put effort into listening to to your friends and family and try to remember personal s…
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/17 06:01 AM
4

That number 4.. I love that one, and it's so important to me right now as I just came out of a LTR with a great man I really love, but I couldn't let go of control and trust him. I am going to copy your nr. 4 in a couple of months :-D. Thanks for sharing :) I would love to hear how it turned out for you in a month!
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/17 04:55 AM
2

I would think so too! I have heard good about Habitica but haven't tried it myself. I am new to RPW and I'm curious to see which goals you girls have. So I will try to join in :-)
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/17 04:56 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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