On RPW and the manosphere, the explanation for why many women have trouble following the lead of their husbands has often been a power struggle, a desire for control.

I think there is another, more practical reason as well. That is this need to optimize everything. Naturally, one thinks one’s way is the most optimal, so when the husband’s way isn’t the same AND one needs to optimize EVERYTHING, then one doesn’t want to follow the husband’s way. Like just relax. Simply being content with life, and having few standards for what can be considered failure is a solution to many problems, including general struggles with teamwork.