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DesignMyself Archive

View 34 posts and 449 comments by DesignMyself on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
167

DesignMyself/r/seduction12/02/12 02:52 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction23/04/11 01:04 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction17/04/11 03:12 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction31/12/11 07:14 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction24/12/11 09:04 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction09/03/12 06:13 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction05/06/11 03:54 AM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction30/12/12 06:45 AM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction27/06/11 03:02 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction09/12/12 05:20 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction19/01/12 02:27 AM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction15/05/11 03:18 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction07/10/11 01:09 AM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction20/01/12 03:35 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction05/05/11 03:05 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction27/02/11 03:27 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction29/03/11 09:55 AM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction17/06/11 12:39 AM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction17/01/11 04:32 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction21/03/11 05:48 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction03/11/11 11:45 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction26/03/11 06:54 AM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction18/03/12 07:45 AM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction18/05/11 12:55 AM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction13/03/11 02:23 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction02/04/11 09:47 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction13/06/11 05:12 AM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction30/07/10 01:55 AM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction22/05/11 03:39 AM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction11/05/11 04:51 AM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction02/01/12 06:44 AM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction16/04/12 02:47 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction08/01/11 07:10 PM
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DesignMyself/r/seduction12/07/10 03:00 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Don’t join the army to meet women. The reason why not should be obvious. Look at reasons why you like yourself that are unrelated to how women respond to you. Are you good to your family? Friends? Do you have hobbies you enjoy? Things you make? Things you did that were difficult or scary at first but you stuck with them? What do you like to do? These women dont you at all and you don’t know them at all. We all have felt down when we’ve felt rejected at some point. Don’t make it the end of your w…
/r/seduction07/03/18 06:30 AM
1

Is it that you don’t want to seem over eager or that you’re afraid of being embarrassed? Over-eager is trying to push her into scheduling the next time you’ll see her. Texting her that night or the next morning at the latest lets her know that there is some interest. It’s another time to show intent. And it opens a channel to talk a bit and flirt if you want.
/r/seduction07/03/18 06:22 AM
1

What’s great is that as you make more friends, you have this experience to draw from. So many people have gone through a rough time after a break up. You don’t want to bring it up all the time, but sharing the vulnerability can make you closer. They’ll probably share about when they felt down after a break up and you can show that you appreciate that they shared that with you.
/r/seduction07/03/18 06:16 AM
3

The reason why most people do most things has almost nothing to do with you. Why she ghosted and why she suddenly appeared again could also have almost nothing to do with you. Do you really want to spend time with her? Go ahead. If it’s too inconvenient, like you have something to do with your friends or it’s too out of your way, then maybe meet her another time. She sounds flaky and that might not change and you don’t need to accommodate that. Try setting something up if you want, but keep look…
/r/seduction07/03/18 06:10 AM
1

Text sooner. Definitely by the next day. Short and sweet. Maybe even sooner asking if they got home ok or sharing some in-joke. You don’t need to get into a big conversation. Just show you give a shit. Maybe if they don’t hear from you, they think that you think it was a one night stand and then have written you off by the time you try to contact them. Some might have even felt hurt and in their mind spent a week not liking you and having all kinds of bad feelings towards you and then you texted…
/r/seduction07/03/18 06:02 AM
1

“I have heard if a guy doesn't make the first move he's not interested“ Not at all true. Many guys don’t because they’re too nervous, don’t know how, or don’t notice that a girl is interested in them (probably because they don’t believe a girl could be interested in them and just don’t expect a girl to show interest). You’re young. It might not seem that way to you but you are. You’re not way behind or broken or anything. You’re just getting more comfortable with yourself and expressing what you…
/r/seduction07/03/18 05:52 AM
1

There is a textbook answer to this exact question in Japan and it worked for me. Answer, “Yes, but you like players, don’t you?”
/r/seduction07/03/18 05:34 AM
1

I struggled with this for a while. Still am probably.
/r/seduction20/04/13 04:33 AM
1

That Aziz Ansari interview is really interesting! It's a good summation of our generation's particular flavor of social communication.
/r/seduction08/03/13 03:11 AM
2

Just finished reading this. Glad to see ThrowawayPUA already posted it. A lot of evo-psych is bullshit, just untestable speculation. In addition, I think it doesn't help us pay attention to some of the real, immediate concerns women might have that have very little to do with reproductive success.
/r/seduction13/01/13 09:30 PM
11

Don't be a dick to people.
/r/seduction04/01/13 03:54 AM
9

I respect the dedication.
/r/seduction01/01/13 12:35 AM
12

Hahahaha this is killing me. You let it drop in an alley and then pulled your trousers back up and finished a first date? Wow.
/r/seduction01/01/13 12:29 AM
1

There are other women available with less drama.
/r/seduction28/12/12 04:42 AM
1

Update: Turns out she does not want my dick. I asked her out again. I got "Let's just be friends." Forgive me, seddit, for I have sinned: I said ok. If I can't deal with that, I'll drop her altogether. In the meantime, trying to meet other girls.
/r/seduction11/12/12 04:57 AM
1

Thanks! Get it in your head that a girl might actually just want your dick. Despite any success I've had so far, I still have trouble with this at times. Good reminder. Go on five more dates with five more girls. Abundance. Yes. I was totally getting in a mind-state of "Don't fuck this up." I'm going to be posting more again. I've done best when I hold myself accountable here. Such a great community.
/r/seduction09/12/12 07:08 PM
2

Also, I don't want women to think just because we had sex early on means I wouldn't date her.
/r/seduction04/12/12 06:30 AM
3

I agree that people should handle it how they want depending ont he situation, but I don't like the division. If I sleep with someone the same night I meet them, I still might want a relationship.
/r/seduction04/12/12 05:17 AM
1

If she makes up an excuse and she does not suggest an alternative plan, you have been shut out. She is not interested. Do not ask her out again. Doing so will only result in awkwardness and you feeling like a tool. I disagree. It is a good sign if she suggests another time to meet, but why worry if it's awkward? You should be asking other girls out anyway. Don't wait for the response of one.
/r/seduction25/11/12 03:16 PM
6

I like this. Pure outcome-independence.
/r/seduction20/11/12 03:33 AM
3

If you meet a girl who's a friend of a friend or sort of in your social circle, what are good ways to ask her to meet you one-on-one?
/r/seduction13/11/12 03:36 AM
0

newbs don't do open heart surgery. terrible simile.
/r/seduction05/11/12 12:31 PM
3

I would add some advice I've seen elsewhere on seddit. Don't see this girl more than once a week. Some guys give off the vibe to girls that they're not to be held down. I don't know why that is. For some guys, it can be tough to turn that off.
/r/seduction05/11/12 01:43 AM
1

Good-natured teasing. As was said elsewhere, don't make fun of the guy's hobby or passion, especially if he seems at all shy. A little teasing accompanied with a touch that gets him to tease back is great. And you get a bit of an inside joke between you two. Start dropping hints as to why you two could meet again, alone preferably.
/r/seduction05/11/12 01:30 AM
6

I'll admit. I came in here thinking I was going to downvote this, but you gave a lot of good advice, especially about having fun, genuine conversations. Plus, it reminded me of my times in hostess bars.
/r/seduction04/11/12 01:11 AM
5

Male here. And I don't. I know types I'm likely to fall for (physically and personality-wise), but there are big outliers as well. Maybe you do and that's great. Part of being human is feeling something, interpreting it as a certain emotional reaction, and then searching for reasons to justify that reaction. I wish this post pointed out that guys do the same damn thing. Oneitis is an example of this.
/r/seduction02/11/12 03:42 PM
2

Thanks. We need more "bridging the gap" like this.
/r/seduction01/11/12 04:04 PM
3

Two of your links are the same.
/r/seduction27/10/12 10:09 PM
3

It was perfectly easy to read and understand.
/r/seduction27/10/12 07:11 PM
20

I love the raisin story. With "we" you two shared a piece of reality in the larger world. Us against the world.
/r/seduction27/10/12 02:34 PM
2

Asians are hooking up somehow aren't they? My kino is still a bit weak, but it's not nonexistent like it used to be. One good tip: Don't look at where you're going to touch them while touching them. Start with light touches with the back of your hand on arms and legs.
/r/seduction23/10/12 04:46 AM
5

I would add that you be prepared with birth control. Don't be one of those guys who got a no-premarital-sex girl pregnant because neither of you were prepared when things got hot and heavy and then she doesn't see abortion as an option.
/r/seduction23/10/12 04:38 AM
11

I would say older women need less of an excuse to get some alone time with you. Older women seem to be more comfortable with their desire to have sex with you. Drawn from limited experience, that's what I've seen so far.
/r/seduction23/10/12 04:32 AM
1

"He's what you want. He's what you want. I'm what you need."- The Weeknd
/r/seduction22/10/12 05:01 PM
1

Thanks! This is good info.
/r/seduction22/10/12 04:55 PM
3

I spent years in Japan and am now back in NY. Any advice on the Japanese ex-pat subculture?
/r/seduction19/10/12 04:17 AM
7

TofuTofu is that value giver.
/r/seduction18/10/12 04:28 AM
2

Feet and legs. Touching hands and wrists across the table. Though there's less of an opportunity for kino, there's lots more opportunity for eye contact.
/r/seduction04/10/12 03:39 PM
1

Really? Any links?
/r/seduction02/10/12 12:53 AM
4

"The Game" is a helluva lot like "Fight Club". Unsatisfied men in search of being "real" men forming secret clubs together and shit getting out of hand. It's so fitting that there is a Tyler Durden in "The Game" too.
/r/seduction01/10/12 01:59 AM
1

I'm really glad you two didn't just let the conversation end with accusations of trolling. You really shared something here once you explained yourself.
/r/seduction11/09/12 03:46 AM
5

I still decide to practice my game on her Tell more about that and help your fellow sedditors.
/r/seduction29/08/12 05:05 AM
10

:) I thought I was going to read that you saw she was doing bad in life while you were doing well, but this is much, much better.
/r/seduction27/08/12 04:35 AM
2

I like that you're here because SRS was making noise about Seddit.
/r/seduction22/08/12 04:53 AM
5

Like I'm "losing" if I give in. This fits right in with a part in The Blueprint about an unexamined belief in society that women lose value by having sex. In your original post you (cleverly) noted that this PUA stuff for men is like swimming against the tide but you're on a jetski. In this way though, you'll have to swim against the tide. No apologies. Stay safe. Have fun.
/r/seduction22/08/12 04:50 AM
4

DAT BANTER! Goddam, girl. I think Delightful White is right again. You'll need to pull so you don't go too cocky/funny and for when the guys move too fast, you'll need push just so they aren't trying to fuck you in the nearest broom closet (unless that's what you want).
/r/seduction22/08/12 04:05 AM
2

I've been there and I didn't cross that line. I've hooked up with girls with boyfriends (and sometimes felt guilty about it). A few months ago, a married woman and I met, kissed, went on a date, kissed some more, and made tentative plans for time alone. I didn't do it though. Why? 1) I didn't want to get shot. 2) I just don't want that drama in my life. 3) I'm not going to save her. I'm not going to be her boyfriend when she has a husband. 4) She had a sad story about her husband and maybe that …
/r/seduction14/08/12 02:34 AM
14

Even if a man just wants sex, he's not an asshole. By having sex with you, he's not taking anything from you. Women enjoy sex too.
/r/seduction09/08/12 02:44 AM
1

No, the compliment isn't going to get anyone laid on its own, but aren't there plenty of people (some of them posting here) who are opening with compliments? Anyway, I'm not here to argue. I agree with your last points and I need more experience myself.
/r/seduction05/08/12 06:41 PM
3

I think you're assuming way too much. Telling her she's cute as an approach isn't as ridiculous as you make it sound. Isn't that direct day game? I think he should keep going out there. He can read stuff in the meantime, but no need to read some certain method first. Experience is king. If it did feel semi-confrontational (standing in front of her), then yeah that should be changed up.
/r/seduction05/08/12 06:19 PM
5

I think a lot of what you said is useful during a date, but this wasn't a date. Here, OP, approached a woman and she invited him to walk with her.
/r/seduction05/08/12 02:15 PM
3

The Stoics recommended “the premeditation of evils,” or deliberately visualizing the worst-case scenario. This tends to reduce anxiety about the future: when you soberly picture how badly things could go in reality, you usually conclude that you could cope. Besides, they noted, imagining that you might lose the relationships and possessions you currently enjoy increases your gratitude for having them now. Positive thinking, by contrast, always leans into the future, ignoring present pleasures. S…
/r/seduction05/08/12 04:18 AM
1

Shit. It really is and it's funny. I want to do lots of stuff like this.
/r/seduction29/07/12 02:22 AM
1

lingual_panda is all grown up. Wild stuff. Stay safe. Good on you for throwing away the outcome dependence and the entitlement criteria.
/r/seduction29/07/12 02:11 AM
7

I agree, but, dude, some of these women in relationships don't make it easy. They come on stronger than single women. They're not happy with their bf and they're looking at you like they want you. Maybe I've going too far down the rabbit hole, but they're not happy with their relationship and they're feeling if they sleep with you, then not only will that give them the impetus to finally end it, but it'll be "proof" that it was never mean to be. Backwards rationalizations that will make your hea…
/r/seduction29/07/12 02:01 AM
12

Open guys for her. Let her open girls for you.
/r/seduction27/07/12 04:25 PM
1

Your story is worth telling to him. Just remember you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink. He might think he's a hopeless case. He might think we're all a bunch of scumbag manipulators. He might think it's not worth doing if he has to try, as in, he might think he can only find someone special through fate. However, if you plant the idea in his head that things can change and that how things have been are not immutably inherent to who he is, then that can be a beginning.
/r/seduction27/07/12 02:59 PM
3

Send the dude a private message.
/r/seduction27/07/12 02:45 PM
2

No, that would totally happen here too. You didn't need to call it a date. That put pressure on it. Being a foreigner, you're going to be invited to things by people who you feel like you barely know. That can be strange but also awesome. a couple minutes later of solid game and I got a phone number. I eject and begin text game. If there's time, make sure you don't eject so soon after getting the number. Keep flirting, keep connecting, talk about meeting up again and what you two could do togeth…
/r/seduction26/07/12 07:20 PM
1

It sounds like you assume attraction even from girls you just see in passing. I hadn't thought to do that.
/r/seduction26/07/12 05:09 AM
17

Well, he wasn't being creepy and she saw that. If she had perceived him to be creepy, he would work on that in the future but he (and us) can't always be responsible for how others react to him.
/r/seduction26/07/12 04:13 AM
35

I like how you smoothly called some things out: "I'm hitting on this girl...", "So is this the part where I..." If it's not too self-deprecating, it shows awareness, comfort, and cleverness.
/r/seduction26/07/12 02:18 AM
7

I've been pursuing the career I want and am making progress. I've been trying to unite good inner game with the actions I take in my life by making sure I say yes to myself instead of rejecting myself. I go to events that interest me even if I have to go alone. I'm becoming more comfortable with it, but I wish I had a steady sociable circle of friends. I haven't gone on a date in a while and I want to move out soon. This is really just a matter of effort.
/r/seduction26/07/12 02:09 AM
2

Thanks. I read your 30 minutes a day e-book and I thought it was great, but I didn't stick to it. I relied more on girls who ended up in my social circle. I don't really want to approach every girl. I want to feel like I could approach any girl, rather than seeing one and being reminded of every time I chickened out. I'll try out the affirmation.
/r/seduction25/07/12 02:59 AM
12

I would say drop increasingly less subtle hints. While talking with a guy, smile and give lots of eye contact. Talk about places you'd like to go or things you'd like to do soon and hopefully he'll be say, "We should go do that. What's your number?" As you can see here on reddit and seddit, there are plenty of guys that won't get even that hint though or second-guess themselves too much, so you might have to be more direct. I got number-closed by a woman the other night. She was a friend of a fr…
/r/seduction25/07/12 02:56 AM
2

I've learned a lot here on seddit. I'm much better at asking girls out and having a good time one-on-one, but I really haven't made much progress in approaching strangers. It's something I'd really like to crack. I'm in NY too and the number of cute women is astounding. I feel like my confidence takes a hit every time I don't talk to one (which is all the time). What should I be doing?
/r/seduction25/07/12 02:35 AM
1

No, you don't have to do that. Lots of bars are very casual. I wouldn't go out of my way to do anything to spend time with this woman unless you think it would be fun anyway. You are enough.
/r/seduction23/07/12 12:50 PM
1

Way to go, dude! Text her. Be playful. Say, "Let's meet for drinks." Lead. Have fun. Don't forget about abundance mentality. Play to win, but this isn't your once chance ever. Looking for a place to get a drink or food? Ask me, GothamSeddit, or look on yelp.com
/r/seduction23/07/12 05:20 AM
3

Improv did a lot for me too.
/r/seduction21/07/12 11:41 PM
10

I wouldn't do anything to become more interesting, but do those things you kept saying you would do but haven't done yet. I think improv is a great one and your reason why is great- it's out of your comfort zone. Dance sounds cool too. That's definitely something I said I would do, but I haven't yet. I've noticed that if I've been thinking about doing something, but I haven't done it yet, then my mind starts unhelpfully rationalizing why I haven't done it yet-- "It's because that's not who you a…
/r/seduction21/07/12 03:19 PM
4

"Not now." - Not ever. Not true. She's still evaluating you, wants to see how you react, or doesn't want her friends seeing you two hook up.
/r/seduction18/07/12 02:54 AM
8

I like this. It also makes one lead (which is attractive) rather than waste time and be passive and reactive (which is unattractive). What are some examples of compliance testing you've used? Before dates, on dates, picking up at bars and such?
/r/seduction09/07/12 02:55 AM
1

I've even just handed my phone over without asking anything and it's worked. Though probably the other advice in this thread is better. Good principles here. Don't make it a big deal. It's not a moment of truth. Don't place the decision in her hands. Just put the phone in her hands.
/r/seduction06/07/12 03:27 AM
4

Yes, please share your first date tips.
/r/seduction05/07/12 04:27 AM
4

Agreed. It's not ideal, but it's not a real limit. OP can still meet women for dates. He can also go back to her place. He can also know of cheap but clean hotels.
/r/seduction18/05/12 02:07 PM
1

This is great. Thank you. Don't reject yourself.
/r/seduction17/05/12 03:00 AM
1

See this girl again.
/r/seduction10/05/12 04:59 PM
1

His cool persistence paid off a few times before that. He said he was hungry and wanted to go elsewhere to eat. She said she wasn't hungry. He said let's go someplace else anyway because he was bored. He suggested the new bar near his place. She said no, but then he asked again later and she said yes. It could have been a very different night if he was just like, "Oh. ok." at any of these points.
/r/seduction24/04/12 12:15 AM
1

Find and read the DiCarlo escalation ladder.
/r/seduction17/04/12 02:43 PM
1

I don't think the author is calling for panic. She's noting the current rise of BDSM in popular culture, the mistmatch with "political correctness", and taking a look at the explanations given. I think it's a good read for new guys on seddit and could be well supplemented by comments from the more experienced PUAs here.
/r/seduction16/04/12 03:16 PM
2

Damn good point. Thanks. I didn't miss anything then.
/r/seduction11/04/12 03:54 PM
6

Make your first priority to enjoy yourself. Make the outcome of fucking the girl an optional goal, not the primary goal. Be outcome independant. This really simplified something that is easy to forget and has been difficult to explain. Having fun = Outcome Independence. Thanks. Your points about teasing are spot on and not talked about enough. I still don't know about which girls should be friends and which should be more. Maybe I've missed some good opportunities in the past.
/r/seduction11/04/12 02:21 PM
1

I was this person for a little while in a different place. Be interested in what people are doing and want to do. Listen. Remember what they're doing. If you have info or know people that can help them, hook 'em up. I want to do this for a particular scene, so I'm eager to hear tips form other people and share what I soon learn.
/r/seduction10/04/12 02:30 AM
1

is that the microescalation pdf?
/r/seduction09/04/12 04:19 AM
1

These don't sound like guys looking for relationships at this point in their lives. I think the PUA advice would be "Build more rapport." Through that, you'll know if they're looking for a relationship, can lay the groundwork for meeting up to do things other than sleep together, and feel more connected to each other so that a relationship develops. I don't think sex early on exiles a woman to the sex zone. I think sex without a lack of rapport leads to that and some guys might just take your le…
/r/seduction09/04/12 04:10 AM
5

I know that feel, bro. It sucks. It messes with your head. You're super-aware of it because you're trying to protect yourself. It's confirmation bias like others have said. Best thing for me was having some good female friends in my life. Through those I see the loyalty of women and hear stories of men being disloyal.
/r/seduction08/04/12 06:52 PM
11

I figured out that the man just has to make the move because most women are not going to do it. she'll see you as a guy who is not confident in his own sexuality but also one that has no idea how to lead her sexually. And for many women, that is what they want (it is part of their ASD). Yup. A real nice guy communicates what he wants and does this for a woman.
/r/seduction07/04/12 03:05 PM
2

I'm glad to read your trip is going better. I think most of us sedditors are likely to try to rely on words too much. It doesn't help that we look for advice through a medium that relies on words. On the dancefloor, some girls aren't looking to talk much. Dance, change positions, spin 'em, push 'em away and pull them back in. Escalate. If you want to talk, move 'em to off the dancefloor for a bit. Moving them is good.
/r/seduction06/04/12 02:04 AM
4

Saint Bartender of the Holy Seduction!
/r/seduction06/04/12 01:32 AM
2

still ridiculous.
/r/seduction02/04/12 09:29 PM
1

My favorite: 3/28/12 – Wednesday -6 day/street approaches. Did the approaches by myself, in the rain, in 20 minutes. A huge improvement from the beginning of the month. -1 phone number, from a girl in the subway. 6 in 20 minutes in the rain! You're an animal!
/r/seduction02/04/12 09:24 PM
2

Detailed, funny, great read!
/r/seduction25/03/12 04:27 PM
2

No one's going to argue about how being in good health is important for one's sense of well-being. It's just that it started sounding very externally focused. Good health and knowing you're making healthy choices can be be contributors and reflections of good inner game, but they are not the same thing as good inner game, I think. I wouldn't want anyone to get the wrong idea and think if they aren't hitting the gym, then they are not in a position to get in the field or even to feel worthy of go…
/r/seduction22/03/12 12:19 AM
1

haha awesome. she sounds like fun.
/r/seduction21/03/12 11:37 PM
2

It is scary. It's also memorable. People will appreciate seeing you try to communicate and learn about their culture. Fellow tourists love to list off where else they travelled to. It can feel intimidating. Get to talking about feelings instead of just back and forth of places. Let them play the expert a bit though. If someone talks about something or someplace you don't know about, ask them about it. I find that any attempt to pretend I know more than I do turns into a dead conversation. Have a…
/r/seduction21/03/12 10:26 PM
2

Well, you have more excuse for kino. You also have a great excuse to open anyone to ask for advice, directions, or recommendations. You have a great life opportunity here, not just pickup opportunity.
/r/seduction21/03/12 10:00 PM
2

Way to go, homey! When you get a chance, you mind making writing up something about how you used those techniques in business. I've been thinking about how Abundance Mentality, Assume Attraction, and Always Escalate are good mindsets in business, but I don't know of enough concrete examples.
/r/seduction21/03/12 03:53 PM
2

Most of this doesn't sound like Inner Game at all. Most of this is about being dependent on feelings derived from exercise.
/r/seduction21/03/12 02:38 PM
8

They're not here. They're out in the wild internet. Go use what you know so far.
/r/seduction21/03/12 05:19 AM
10

Not a post. Juggler's a PUA who helped train Neil Strauss. He has an e-book around somewhere. After The Game, his e-book was one of the first things I read. It's mostly about conversation.
/r/seduction21/03/12 05:10 AM
89

This reminds me of what Juggler encouraged as his golden line: "So, not only are you sexy, you're also smart(or funny, or well-travelled, or ambitious, etc.)" Not "cute", not "cool", always "sexy".
/r/seduction21/03/12 12:28 AM
3

I think you mean, "The Book of Pook"
/r/seduction21/03/12 12:11 AM
9

I made sure to always have an answer. To lead the way, so to speak. The most awkward conversation you can have with a girl is when neither of you can decide on a place to go because neither one is willing to propose an idea that the other person doesn't like. In other words, when she asked "where do you want to go?" I made sure never to answer "I don't care, where do you want to go?" Women want you to take the lead. That's giving value. Do it for friends too. I'm a little rusty on it though. Don…
/r/seduction20/03/12 06:53 PM
6

And I honestly can't remember the last time I read about negging being encouraged here. A little teasing is good, but negging is so notorious. Plenty of women know about it. Some of the idea behind it is solid though. Show you're not there to seek her approval and show you're willing to lose her.
/r/seduction20/03/12 06:47 PM
3

Maybe they're just shit friends.
/r/seduction20/03/12 01:47 PM
1

I've got a friend like this too and I've tried talking to him about how things can change, but he's resigned himself to a life without women...so far.
/r/seduction19/03/12 02:43 PM
2

This is one of the most unique FRs I've read. I once thought about what it would be like to walk up to a girl and just them them to do most of the reacting, but I never tried it out.
/r/seduction19/03/12 02:38 PM
1

Talk about what you enjoy talking about, but here are some ideas: travelling, photography or any artistic hobby, places to eat. Depends on the girl of course, but you could try these out if they also interest you.
/r/seduction18/03/12 07:40 PM
1

OK. Thanks. I'm going to absorb this.
/r/seduction18/03/12 01:48 PM
3

Convey interest with the eye contact, but joke around and have fun or connect.
/r/seduction17/03/12 09:28 PM
2

So detailed! Good info in here for specific examples of kino. At the restaurant, seating across from each other isn't ideal for kino, but it is great for eye contact. Maybe build up sexual tension in the eye contact and conversation until you two touch again. Also, legs can touch under the table. IOIs are tricky. It's really cool to learn to recognize them, but take them as a sign you could have been moving faster already. Do that instead of waiting for IOIs to tell you when to go. How was the d…
/r/seduction17/03/12 05:02 PM
8

This is totally a success! We didn't keep them in laughter. Remember that is not your goal anyway. Have fun with them. The silence can be a gift. Look the girl in the eye.
/r/seduction17/03/12 01:58 PM
6

Solid. I think he's attacking a false "Inner Game", a type I haven't seen espoused on seddit, but there's some great stuff in here. How does one raise his self esteem? I’ll be writing a lot about this in the coming year, but here’s the short answer: commit to goals for no one else but yourself and accomplish them, take responsibility for everything that happens in your life, seek out activities and actions based on passion for the activity and not for approval or validation from others. As menti…
/r/seduction17/03/12 01:15 PM
5

TofuTofu has been here sharing great stuff since long before SimplePickup began or became popular.
/r/seduction17/03/12 02:31 AM
3

Thanks, dude.
/r/seduction15/03/12 05:16 PM
1

"How many boyfriends do you have?" I think I used that once or twice.
/r/seduction15/03/12 06:11 AM
1

I like a woman who can stare at her body and feel confident and comfortable. It's better than all the complaining/ fishing for compliments, but yeah, she needed the external validation as well.
/r/seduction15/03/12 02:51 AM
2

Great dialogue!
/r/seduction14/03/12 09:08 PM
1

Sooooooooo, what happened?
/r/seduction14/03/12 08:30 PM
18

Why she cheated? I don't really know. I think she really loved me, but she didn't act consistent with that love. I read an article yesterday in the NY Times that had a paragraph which made me think, "Huh. I think that was my ex." Let me find it.... Here: "“Research has documented that women who wear skimpy or sexually provocative clothing tend to be higher on the trait of narcissism,” says Dr. Buss, a psychologist at the University of Texas. “My research on married couples found that the trait o…
/r/seduction14/03/12 08:28 PM
3

Also, please don't eat me.
/r/seduction14/03/12 08:15 PM
3

I let her lead me into a friendship while I was still heartbroken and in love. I took my cues from her, but it hurt to see her so easily move on and friendship wasn't why I was seeing her. I just wanted to see her. She didn't have my best interests at heart. I didn't know what was best for me. She probably felt better about her cheating if she could maintain a friendship with me. Plus, I was always there to validate her when she felt weak or lonely. I would never make it a general rule to never …
/r/seduction14/03/12 08:15 PM
12

Bingo! I didn't know she cheated on me the first time, but looking back on it, she almost certainly did.
/r/seduction14/03/12 08:06 PM
2

DO IT
/r/seduction14/03/12 04:48 PM
121

After reading that update, I put a hat on. Then, I took it off. My hat's off to you, a stronger man than I. You did the right thing. I made the other choice and it did me no good.
/r/seduction14/03/12 04:36 PM
4

I've mostly avoided cold approaches, but I'd really like to get started on daygame.
/r/seduction14/03/12 06:09 AM
1

Great summary! Careful with SRS. There's a lot of self-righteous, outraged ignorance.
/r/seduction14/03/12 05:34 AM
1

Word. This quote is truth and I use it for everything.
/r/seduction14/03/12 03:00 AM
1

I'd like to know more about this if you have anything you can direct me to. I've been switching careers and trying to bring what I've learned elsewhere, but I also often feel like such a beginner which is both exciting and intimidating.
/r/seduction12/03/12 06:05 AM
8

I suspect that in my lifetime I have disappointed a number of women by actually just watching a movie.
/r/seduction12/03/12 03:17 AM
1

Sorry I don't have a link and I couldn't find one. Maybe someone's google-fu is better than mine.
/r/seduction11/03/12 09:28 PM
8

right. even when it's not the actual first step. there was a bbc documentary about this stuff in which they had hidden cameras all over a club. researchers reviewed the video and found that most of the time, women were opening men by using eye contact.
/r/seduction11/03/12 09:08 PM
1

A beer festival? Was this Muslim woman drinking beer?
/r/seduction06/03/12 02:04 AM
3

This is a helluva LMR line. If it is at all. It asks for way too much from you. It might not be true, but ti does show she is really, really uncomfortable with thinking of herself as a woman who has sex outside of a committed relationship.
/r/seduction06/03/12 01:49 AM
2

Yeah, he has to let her initiate the sex. Otherwise, she's going to blame him for the sex. I know that doesn't make sense, but that's how I see it going down.
/r/seduction06/03/12 01:45 AM
7

A girl once did this to me. The rules weren't as formal though. I already knew her. We were at a party. She liked how I danced and said I got 2 points for that. I knew what was up. She was putting herself in the position of approval.
/r/seduction05/03/12 03:16 PM
4

If you have a girl's number, I don't think you have much need to add her on facebook or worry about what she thinks of how you seem on facebook. You can stay mysterious. I have tons of "social proof" on facebook. It's not getting me laid. Maybe, maybe it makes girls feel more comfortable with me because they see other girls are, but not much else. If you're trying to drop into social circles, facebook helps though.
/r/seduction04/03/12 11:03 PM
1

Experience is the best way to learn.
/r/seduction29/02/12 01:25 AM
5

How to Kino videos
/r/seduction29/02/12 01:23 AM
1

So, lead people by example to comfort?
/r/seduction28/02/12 01:48 PM
1

How is social proofing used in a job interview?
/r/seduction28/02/12 05:06 AM
1

I'm a bit nervous, so my mind can't generate much wit or humour yet. That's fine. Just listen and say what's obvious. There have been other posts here about conversation-threading. Lower the bar for what you're willing to say. Don't just ask questions. Share things about yourself. If they mention something you don't know about, don't clam up. Ask them about it and learn something. Over time, you'll feel more comfortable and you'll notice how uncomfortable other people are instead of only noticin…
/r/seduction28/02/12 05:01 AM
13

Glad to help. I had forgotten about this. Someone else on seddit advised not saying anything serious for the beginning. When rereading an old FR I saw I used the advice successfully.
/r/seduction27/02/12 06:37 PM
71

Don't say anything serious for the first 5 or 10 minutes. Everything is a joke or an obvious lie or you give a straight answer and start exaggerating to silly extremes. What do you do? You're an astronaut. Who do you know here? No one. You wandered in because you could smell the food outside. That crappy song that's playing is your favorite song because it reminds you of chasing butterflies in your childhood. Don't hog the conversation. Don't get stuck in a entertainer role. From all this nonsen…
/r/seduction27/02/12 06:03 PM
3

Interesting push/pull you did twice. You told the birthday girl it's you and her and then said MAYBE you'll find her later. Then, with the HB9 you told her she giving you her number and that MAYBE you could hang out later. Let us know about the follow-up.
/r/seduction27/02/12 04:55 AM
1

Here are my thoughts on it. This is not "canon" of the seduction community. I don't think I've seen the word target up here much and I haven't used the HB scale. Yes, there is some objectification. No, it is not necessarily a sign of sexism. Yes, it does risk encouraging a sexist attitude. Why all the jargon and sometimes referring to women as targets or assigning numbers of attractiveness to them? Because we are sharing advice. We are trying to learn from each other's experiences. In order to d…
/r/seduction26/02/12 05:12 PM
2

I missed the part where you said you tried.
/r/seduction26/02/12 05:21 AM
1

I got the joke.
/r/seduction24/02/12 11:36 PM
4

Well, I and everyone else now knows for sure to ignore what you're trying to highlight because you're indicating misogyny where there clearly is none. It's a shame because there are conversations worth having regarding misogyny and the seduction community. I anticipate these conversations to be difficult, complex, and uncomfortable, so I hope the participants come to them with the patience and empathy that fosters productive conversation. You are not showing yourself to be that person. Good luck…
/r/seduction24/02/12 04:14 PM
6

And you got upvoted? Get your SRS brigade out of here. I asked a real question and you added nothing to the conversation. My question asking what is misogynist is misogynist?
/r/seduction24/02/12 04:01 PM
3

He said nothing about eyeliner or nail polish. You brought that up as some kind of assumption to mock him. What he advised sounds rather in line with the inner game that is often advised. He's saying don't get distracted by opportunities to supplicate because you're already good enough. The purpose of the SEDUCTION subreddit is not having sex quickly with a woman? Well, it's not the whole point, but it's not off-base to say it is a point and people can be pissed at seddit for that but that doesn…
/r/seduction24/02/12 03:58 PM
3

what's misogynist about his comment?
/r/seduction24/02/12 03:48 PM
4

I agree. Also, hasn't there been plenty of LMR advice up here lately? Is this bait from SRS? "OK" or "That's cool" and continue with what she's cool with. Seems like you got some girls fully undressed too quickly.
/r/seduction23/02/12 01:43 AM
1

I need confidence to talk to girls and can only achieve confidence by talking to girls. Not true. I'm sure you have plenty of reasons to feel confident about yourself.
/r/seduction22/02/12 10:30 PM
1

I don't know. I usually say something like, "Let's hang out sometime soon, here's my number ###-####" and she usually replies with hers. If you can insert something in that message about something you two already talked about or a tease or an inside joke, then that feels natural too.
/r/seduction22/02/12 03:16 AM
1

Man, you're going to feel awesome right after you try. You're going to be excited.
/r/seduction22/02/12 01:32 AM
1

It might not take nearly as long as you think. From field reports I've read and my own experience, progress can be very sudden but also uneven. Know that whatever effort you make and post, you'll have our help.
/r/seduction22/02/12 01:23 AM
3

Post even your efforts. It helped me.
/r/seduction22/02/12 12:49 AM
2

I am high-fiving my screen right now!
/r/seduction20/02/12 06:14 PM
11

Praise that doesn't seem to be earned is often repulsive. Very interesting how she felt she couldn't be herself because you were busy loving some other unreal version of herself. A lack of connection. Relates to Juggler Method which includes escalating on her highs: when she DHVs, when she shares something about herself and not when you feel you're impressing her.
/r/seduction17/02/12 01:58 PM
1

What's so special about you that it would never work for you? Just try it anyway.
/r/seduction15/02/12 03:32 AM
8

It's funny how it works. A dude pokes his head in here and asks how to get some girl interested in him. Seddit gives him some practical advice but mostly tells him to value himself more. Soon, he's asking himself deep questions.
/r/seduction15/02/12 03:27 AM
19

They do share quite a bit by word-of-mouth and magazines, but a lot of it is shitty advice, eats at their self-confidence, and is made to make them go shopping.
/r/seduction14/02/12 05:58 PM
9

Women are very aware of The Game. Some are very entertained by the seduction community. Some have strong feelings against it. Some are very supportive. A few are involved. Why hasn't a seduction/self-improvement community for women taken off? As this turns more and more into self-improvement, aren't women in danger of missing out on what could apply to them just as well?
/r/seduction14/02/12 05:34 PM
1

What principles did Game bring that have helped to make it successful? I'd say the sharing and appreciation of field reports above theory and conventional wisdom. What else? Inner Game is growing in emphasis. What beliefs are most important and how does one begin to believe them? Where is this going? Where would you like it to go? What are some pitfalls you can see on the way? For example, gurus, authors, and companies, need to believe there is always more to discover and then teach. As helpful …
/r/seduction14/02/12 05:21 PM
3

Let's look at V-Day another way. Is there an opportunity there? New Year's Eve brought in a lot of good field reports.
/r/seduction13/02/12 09:32 PM
261

I think you were grinding, leveled-up, and then took on a boss without using any potions. Congrats!
/r/seduction13/02/12 05:21 PM
1

I know people in very serious LTRs from OKC. I don't plan on relying on it, but it was really nice to meet someone I wouldn't have met otherwise.
/r/seduction13/02/12 04:24 PM
1

6-7? I don't use it. There's "sexy" and there's "sexy and she knows it". I found her sexy.
/r/seduction13/02/12 03:09 PM
1

Nice!
/r/seduction13/02/12 03:04 PM
1

Doesn't matter. Use those things to talk about you. Be able to talk about what she's passionate about by relating to the feelings and asking questions and seeing how it may relate to who she is.
/r/seduction13/02/12 03:01 PM
2

Here are some others: tapping people with the back of your hand on their upper arm when getting their attention/making a point/teasing and slightly pulling a girl in by the elbow/shoulder/small of her back when you want to hear her better or have something to whisper (especially good in loud places). "How to Kino (1/10)" is a good video on youtube.
/r/seduction13/02/12 03:19 AM
3

Maybe his comment most applies to once I was at her place. Then, it was clear closing could happen (attraction-level wise and logistically) but I just had to make sure not to get tripped by any common stumbling blocks like LMR. I could have been more passionate or followed the DiCarlo escalation ladder, but I didn't because maybe I was a little hesitant too. We just met a few hours ago and I was in her place in a neighborhood I don't know. Anyway, I did "finish first" though I wasn't trying hard…
/r/seduction13/02/12 03:03 AM
2

That makes a lot of sense.
/r/seduction13/02/12 02:54 AM
4

Have fun. Have fun with the people around you- girls and guys. Help them have fun. Smile. Don't take yourself too seriously.
/r/seduction13/02/12 02:47 AM
2

OK. got ya. Thanks.
/r/seduction13/02/12 02:36 AM
6

"Girls don't make moves (often), but they do make opportunities." was one of the first things I learned in the field. Relearning it and accepting it seems to help me not be so reaction-seeking. I don't want to look for IOIs so much as just recognize them as a sign I could be doing more already.
/r/seduction13/02/12 02:34 AM
1

Agreed. If you make a big deal of a lil' flaking early on, that seems dickish and she'll take that as a warning sign to stay away from you. She may have really become suddenly too busy. If you get into a scolding mode, she's not going to make up for it later. If she flakes again, maybe tease her about it. If it continues after that, forget her.
/r/seduction13/02/12 01:45 AM
10

My experience (and also what I've learned from asking sex-positive female friends) is that women do not often make unambiguous moves, but they will make the opportunity for you. It's good to recognize them, but not to wait for them.
/r/seduction13/02/12 01:32 AM
2

I was a bit hesitant to mention the poor performance, but fuck it. It happens. It's no big deal just like LMR. She didn't throw me out of her home or bed and it was interesting to suddenly be on the other side where she totally wanted sex and I didn't. Also, she's been messaging me since.
/r/seduction13/02/12 01:25 AM
3

Here is TofuTofu's advice for OKC Very simple and valuable. I would add that on OKC, text, and fb inviting a girl out early on works well even when it doesn't work well immediately. For example, one girl ignored that I said we should meet up and asked me a few more questions, then after a few more exchanges, she said we should meet. In the past, I've asked girls out to things and they've declined, but they'll often come through by suggesting another day or soon inviting me to something.
/r/seduction13/02/12 01:22 AM
2

It wasn't in my profile, but it did come up in our first online chat. I said I didn't like living where I was, but I showed that I was up to a lot of things I felt passionate about.
/r/seduction13/02/12 01:17 AM
5

What do you mean by make reservations?
/r/seduction13/02/12 01:15 AM
2

I can't bring girls back to my place because it's not really my place. I'm also saving money while I make moves. How would it be best to go about getting back to her place? I don't know. She knew I lived far away. I met her closer to her place than to my place, so it was easy for her to invite me back to her place as it got late. Maybe it would help to get her talking about her place and then she can easily segue to inviting you over.
/r/seduction13/02/12 01:13 AM
3

Good tip.
/r/seduction13/02/12 01:10 AM
2

I think I even used "I understand" because, well, I do. Seddit helped me understand where she's coming from.
/r/seduction13/02/12 01:10 AM
2

Glad the humor was appreciated.
/r/seduction13/02/12 01:06 AM
2

While kissing in bed, she sometimes lightly pushed at my chest as an expression of LMR, I guess. I made a sound effect and moved away in grand slow-motion style like I got a knock-out punch.
/r/seduction13/02/12 01:05 AM
2

Thanks, man. Yeah, in the suburbs, but gosh usually not bad at sex. This was a fluke. It was enlightening though. Afterwards, I was suddenly not interested in sex, but she was. So, the tables turned.
/r/seduction13/02/12 01:03 AM
17

Hahahaha I know it's an animated version of a lion in Disney film. I've been thinking about that for a while and wanted to share that half-jokingly. For the unexperienced, I think it's helpful.
/r/seduction12/02/12 05:31 PM
5

I used to be overly literal and it wasn't helping me at all. Now, I'm more sympathetic to a woman's dilemmas, but outwardly I'm just not acknowledging the nonsense.
/r/seduction12/02/12 04:49 PM
20

So simple. So smart. I hadn't thought of that. Thanks!
/r/seduction12/02/12 04:00 PM
8

I don't know what you're talking about. I only first heard of the 7 hour rule earlier this week and that was in a RSD video saying it was a limiting belief. That's been my experience as well.
/r/seduction12/02/12 03:49 PM
3

I came in here to remind you keep your inner game strong even in this LTR, but maybe you know that already.
/r/seduction12/02/12 02:52 PM
11

Oh man. That's the funniest thing I've ever read on seddit.
/r/seduction08/02/12 06:34 PM
1

It's not even that cunty, but it throws a lot of good men off. I remember being hit with a textbook example shit test and replying with a genuine answer and the girl kept bugging me. I then remembered the textbook reply and that settled it instantly. It's some kind of broken screening process. It's a test of congruency, but not actually a test of good character.
/r/seduction06/02/12 03:32 AM
1

It's thrown me a bit too when a girl has approached me. I think the best cure for that is really getting it settled into your reality that girls want you.
/r/seduction05/02/12 04:19 PM
0

Certainly not all the advice here works for all women all the time. Maybe you wouldn't even give those shit tests in the first place. However, being a woman just means you have a sample size of 1. Here we got guys running into the same shit tests again and again and finding that certain responses work better than others.
/r/seduction05/02/12 04:15 PM
1

I didn't know power poses would affect risk-taking. That's impressive.
/r/seduction26/01/12 03:26 AM
1

Keep cleaning supplies right near your toilet. Lady can unload without fear of leaving a mess behind from her messy behind.
/r/seduction26/01/12 02:34 AM
2

"...I'm what you need. need. need." Truth.
/r/seduction26/01/12 02:28 AM
2

Good idea. That involves them and pushes me to do it.
/r/seduction20/01/12 07:16 PM
2

Thank you. I really don't want to deal with these things separately. What you say sounds like a good integration.
/r/seduction20/01/12 04:57 PM
2

you HAVE to realize that you're surrounded by timid, scared, small people and if you just ACT, you'll be in front of most of them. Wow. Just pulling this one out there to be better seen.
/r/seduction19/01/12 05:00 AM
1

He answers some very basic stuff very well. His definition of flirting and explanation for anxiety in particular impressed me.
/r/seduction19/01/12 02:32 AM
1

I think that's a good way of putting it.
/r/seduction19/01/12 02:08 AM
4

And this is why "just be yourself" is both good and useless advice. We've heard it before and we took it to mean, "do what comes naturally". However, what came naturally was too distorted by bad habits and fear. Now, we're learning what it means to bring our true selves out. Maybe you feel the same way.
/r/seduction18/01/12 02:13 AM
10

I like your 2nd point quite a bit. It can make sense of things for guys who wonder why girls are ignoring them when they look good on paper to spend time with guys who aren't as impressive on paper. Also, it gives me hope. For your 3rd point, I think I'm in danger of that. My stories are very prepped, but in an attempt to be more talkative, I find myself telling the same stories and I don't know which ones I've told before. I have started to wonder why I want to tell some stories again. Some I H…
/r/seduction14/01/12 03:02 PM
1

I haven't field-tested this, but maybe 2 Truths and a Lie. It's a common ice-breaker. If you can keep the topic to something better for attraction than the dry facts that often come up with this game in job settings, then that would be good. Ask the girl to repeat the one you're skeptical about while making a big deal of looking deep into her eyes to see if she's telling the truth. Take your time, think aloud, make silly assumptions.
/r/seduction14/01/12 04:39 AM
1

Kegel Exercises are often suggested. You can probably find routines thru the google. Also, just stop if you need to.
/r/seduction14/01/12 03:52 AM
2

Hell yeah. I thought you put it really well too. the guys are just learning how to get their intentions across
/r/seduction14/01/12 03:45 AM
1

I can't believe this has been downvoted. At a glance, it looks like this thread got invaded by a downvote brigade.
/r/seduction14/01/12 03:32 AM
1

it's your job to bring them to that point (whether they like it or not), no matter what it takes. I have not seen that encouraged here.
/r/seduction14/01/12 03:27 AM
3

Tricking isn't honest, so your reply is irrelevant. Additionally, what?! How do you trick someone into sucking your dick? Tell them it's a lollipop?
/r/seduction14/01/12 03:24 AM
2

Sedditor Just adding my quick summary. "I wouldn't have seen it if I hadn't believed it with my own mind." Read that carefully. Your beliefs, especially about yourself, are affecting the opportunities you see.
/r/seduction12/01/12 02:32 AM
6

I don't like the stringing along part. That's cruel. You can fuck girls without giving a false impression. Don't use people.
/r/seduction09/01/12 03:25 PM
2

Nice.
/r/seduction09/01/12 04:42 AM
1

Oh. I never saw that movie. I thought you were just surprised. Did the movie have an answer?
/r/seduction09/01/12 01:22 AM
3

what?
/r/seduction08/01/12 10:12 PM
3

Seduction seems to be about destroying "leagues", so I wouldn't start buying into leagues.
/r/seduction08/01/12 09:20 PM
1

Can one love oneself as much as one can love another?
/r/seduction08/01/12 09:11 PM
2

Oh that's much better. Women love James Franco's looks, it wouldn't make any sense for him to be Style.
/r/seduction07/01/12 05:53 PM
1

Glad to see you went out again today! The mind is a liar. I got to catch up.
/r/seduction06/01/12 04:36 AM
3

Well, yes. Because these public spaces are semi-private. Izakayas may have semi-private booths and closed rooms. Karaoke tends not to be done not at a bar with strangers but in a room you rent out with just your friends. In that room, you can order drinks and food to be brought to you. At the net cafe you can get your own little private booth. Besides sex and dating, if you and your circle of friends don't have the space at anyone's home to hang out, then you hang out in places like these.
/r/seduction05/01/12 05:41 PM
3

Living space tends to be smaller in Japan than in the U.S. Small apartments. Houses are often built right next to each other even in non-urban areas. Also, many young adults live with their parents. And some young adults are provided dormitories at a low-cost by their jobs, but can't really have guests.
/r/seduction05/01/12 05:23 PM
3

The idea is that you're supposed to be up to your forehead in mental anguish and pain to the point where you have no choice but to sort through it and feel out your true feelings. Yes, you care about that person, but why? Why do you feel the way you do? It was this that made me dig deep. Not only, "Why do I feel this way?", but also, "Why does how she feel about me affect how I feel about me so much?" Then, that got me thinking about all these other times in my life where what other people think…
/r/seduction05/01/12 04:41 PM
2

True. It's because so many adults in Japan don't have much private space at home, so lots of things we would think of doing at home are done at izakayas (have a dinner or drinking party), internet cafes (surf the net, play games, read manga, watch a dvd on the couch with your gf), karaoke booths, love hotels, small bars that stay open really late, cafes, and family restaurants. It can get expensive. I miss Japan.
/r/seduction05/01/12 03:48 PM
4

She doesn't need to know your logistics were bad. Maybe you could have got her all hot for you, but then made a smooth exit and she'd be chasing after you for a 2nd date. Haha maybe that's an extreme version of your PPP!
/r/seduction05/01/12 05:23 AM
2

This advice is encouraging for me too. I only approached one girl and she was a salesgirl. However, throughout the day I was friendlier with folks I encountered and way more willing to ask questions in stores.
/r/seduction05/01/12 05:10 AM
1

I've got a babyface too. It doesn't seem to hurt. Sounds like the girl was pretty much negging you. She complimented you, but then tried to take it away. If you're getting the same comments and questions about your babyface, then test out different responses.
/r/seduction04/01/12 01:16 AM
2

It's the DiCarlo Escalation Ladder. That's the source of that Obi-wan Kenobi voice in your head saying, "Use that condom line." Well done! Have fun, don't friendzone yourself, kino, take the lead, and be ready for LMR- seems to be the way.
/r/seduction04/01/12 12:56 AM
1

I would guess that keeping a journal would help with this.
/r/seduction03/01/12 05:32 PM
47

When you see someone who has no game, then you know game exists.
/r/seduction03/01/12 03:46 AM
1

Yeah that's good for me. Shit. I think I'm nervous already :)
/r/seduction03/01/12 03:26 AM
198

I ask Women 2 if she brought a condom since I didn't bring one with me to the party - she hands it over. I go grab woman 1 and start making out and then on the dance floor I grab her hand and lead her into a bedroom and seal the deal. This guy asked for a condom from his former oneitis and used it to fuck another girl! This guy gets all the applause.
/r/seduction02/01/12 02:29 PM
1

I think I want to do this.
/r/seduction02/01/12 03:40 AM
3

Nice. Can you give some examples of the qualifying questions you posed?
/r/seduction01/01/12 05:22 PM
10

Sorry, man. Well, look at it this way. You probably got your worst night of the year out of the way early. In NYC, there were probably tons of cranky people who don't usually go out who thought they needed to have their guard way more than they needed. You might have been at a bar filled with people who live up their own ass.
/r/seduction01/01/12 04:54 PM
2

We've all been there.
/r/seduction31/12/11 09:45 PM
1

No matter the outcome. You can come here, write about it, and have our support.
/r/seduction31/12/11 09:32 PM
1

I know a girl like that. We didn't really date, but we fooled around a lot. Sex would have been nice, but all the other stuff we did was fun too. In fact, she was more enthusiastic about oral sex than less "pure" girls I had been with. I never tried to convert her to pre-marital sex. I think that would have run the risk of her becoming too attached to me. If you do convert anyone like that, make sure they practice sex safely because they might not be familiar with their birth control and STD pro…
/r/seduction31/12/11 07:29 PM
3

Another victim of an Ambien and Reddit cocktail?
/r/seduction30/12/11 07:32 PM
1

I don't know which PUA it was, but he talked about how once he understood where women were coming from- their screening process, the excuses that allow them to be free, and stuff, then he was able to show a woman he understood all that immediately. He could be an ally in helping her find the right guy (him), rather than be in an oppositional stance and feel frustrated by the hoops she tried to make guys jump through. That's something I was trying to keep in mind, even if just for myself. Plus, I…
/r/seduction30/12/11 04:19 AM
1

Because I thought a more sympathetic reframing might better help you and others to see it closer from (hypothetical) her perspective.
/r/seduction29/12/11 11:34 PM
1

Or they want something without being looked down on for it.
/r/seduction29/12/11 04:21 AM
2

I don't see how name-calling is helpful.
/r/seduction28/12/11 08:32 PM
1

I agree with that though I'd prefer to throw away the term "slut" altogether rather than confuse enjoying sex with crazy.
/r/seduction28/12/11 08:14 PM
5

So your definition of slut already completely overlaps with crazy? I hope this doesn't include all or most women who enjoy sex like many men do.
/r/seduction28/12/11 07:46 PM
8

Agreed. The thread is an interesting read of things that didn't work at all.
/r/seduction28/12/11 06:24 PM
2

I didn't equate agreeing with conforming. I pointed out that he said he agreed with one idea but also seemed to be saying that in public he would pretend to have another opinion.
/r/seduction28/12/11 06:22 PM
2

And many of us sedditors are in the business of skewing the average for men.
/r/seduction28/12/11 06:03 PM
5

So, you agree but you feel compelled to conform to overall society's opinion?
/r/seduction28/12/11 05:26 PM
1

I upvoted before I clicked because you're making a big step. 1) Build a distance between your thoughts and your beliefs. Build a distance between your thoughts and your actions. The mind can chatter all sorts of unhelpful things. Don't identify with those thoughts. If you have to mentally repeat, "I love myself" or "I'm awesome" while doing something, do it. It will become truer. And you'll become aware of all the little times your thoughts were criticizing you and you'll see that you don't need…
/r/seduction28/12/11 04:39 PM
39

Maybe some people have anecdotes that they think fit with this, but what is this saying? What's a slut according to this? A woman who has had a certain number of sexual partners? A woman who will sleep with you on the same night as meeting you? Do you really believe that 90% of women with many sexual partners or a willingness for a same-night-lay are insane? Slut= crazy? A woman who wants sex like you want sex= crazy?
/r/seduction28/12/11 04:17 PM
10

I thought it was interesting how fidgety and nervous the girls sounded while the guys seemed to be still and in control despite dressed as nerds.
/r/seduction28/12/11 05:03 AM
2

Good work on the date and the FR!
/r/seduction27/12/11 08:11 PM
4

"How am I not myself?" After telling a friend I was into this PUA stuff, she said, "Just be yourself." I think more experienced PUAs have pointed out that that is both great and horrible advice. If I take it to mean, "just keep doing what you're doing and expect different results", then it's not helpful. If I take it to mean, "find out how to more sincerely and effectively express myself", then it's great advice. What I learned is that I couldn't just "be myself" because I was getting in the way…
/r/seduction27/12/11 03:53 PM
3

Say, "But, you like players don't you?" I read that once. Used it too. It worked.
/r/seduction27/12/11 04:19 AM
2

What was the initial kino you used?
/r/seduction26/12/11 05:19 PM
1

Oh, once we went into her hotel room, we took off our jackets and shoes. Then, I dove right into the bed right when she did. There wasn't really any other place to hang, plus it was late and we had been drinking. She only mentioned the pictures after getting in bed. We didn't look at them. Probably a few guys want to tell me that I should have started kissing her earlier- once we got in the hotel room or even on the elevator. And I would agree with them. That slight lull between anticipation at …
/r/seduction26/12/11 07:06 AM
9

This is a good question. I was hanging out with a girl a lot. I think we pre-empted this problem. Have the guy approach dudes and then introduce you. You approach girls and introduce him. If you open like that, introduce each other as friends, mostly stay out of each other's way, but wing and create jealousy occasionally, then you are great resources for each other.
/r/seduction26/12/11 03:34 AM
1

sedditor hug
/r/seduction26/12/11 03:07 AM
5

In NYC. I'm black. They were Swedish tourists.
/r/seduction25/12/11 04:53 AM
1

Yes, there's certainly a difference. I didn't feel comfortable being more dominant though because she was conflicted, I hadn't been leading much, and she was getting strangely passive.
/r/seduction25/12/11 04:36 AM
8

I believe that now and I don't forget it. At the time, I thought I was the exception.
/r/seduction25/12/11 02:32 AM
6

I'm really conflicted about this, but my actions say otherwise. I don't like hooking up with a girl who has a boyfriend. So, I don't pursue one for anything more than casual sex and friendship. I feel I can't trust her, but girls with boyfriends seem to really like me. Maybe it's because I appear very nice and they somehow feel that it's not really cheating then or they convince themselves that when they decide to spend time alone with me, it's not obviously just for sex. I don't know. Hooking u…
/r/seduction25/12/11 01:47 AM
2

I don't know what the moral of the story is, but it impressed on me that sometimes people indicate or say the opposite of what they want and somehow expect people to read their minds. Was this a case of that? I don't know, but by a certain point, I couldn't really find out.
/r/seduction25/12/11 01:28 AM
8

I definitely was lacking on the leading and I considered going much harder, but she was being really passive and I didn't want to feel rapey. I felt like Louis CK in that story which ends with "I'm not going to rape you on the off-chance you're into that shit." Point taken though. More leading and from much earlier on.
/r/seduction24/12/11 09:42 PM
2

Thanks. I don't like getting with girls who have boyfriends, but it happens (too much!) and this one was talking up so much how she was going to have fun and he didn't need to know what happened. She clearly crossed the line with me, but she felt bad for it.
/r/seduction24/12/11 09:31 PM
3

Your sarcastic criticism doesn't even seem to be in response to the OP. You seem to be criticizing "seduction" in general or your idea of it and feeling pretty superior about it.
/r/seduction24/12/11 08:28 PM
2

too late!
/r/seduction22/12/11 03:35 PM
1

Thank you. I'm experimenting with meditation and affirmations right now.
/r/seduction19/12/11 02:17 AM
1

Sorry, I don't know. I got distracted by your physical description. He got in your head. That may have been what he was going for.
/r/seduction15/12/11 06:13 PM
2

Thanks. I'm in a transition right now and having a hard time with it. Most of my peers have settled down. I don't look down on that, but I sometimes feel insecure that I haven't done the same.
/r/seduction15/12/11 04:05 AM
3

it's my issue too. that's why it came to mind.
/r/seduction14/12/11 11:55 PM
12

I think what you said is true, but I would warn against letting this slip into believing that you have to be "complete" or "perfect" before approaching or escalating.
/r/seduction14/12/11 06:07 PM
7

Daaaamn, Tofu. So, all this leading requires a lot of knowledge about what's going at that time in town. You don't even live in NY. I don't know if this is a silly question to ask, but how do you know where to lead people?
/r/seduction11/12/11 11:34 PM
2

He does run his mouth but that bit between 17 and 18 minutes is truly something to consider.
/r/seduction09/12/11 03:17 AM
1

What did you do to work on your inner game?
/r/seduction22/11/11 11:43 PM
1

Way to go! Eyeliner and mascara definitely catches my attention a lot.
/r/seduction20/11/11 07:49 PM
1

I thought you were going to post a picture of Christina Hendricks and her husband.
/r/seduction20/11/11 03:13 PM
1

wow. very relevant video.
/r/seduction15/11/11 05:39 PM
1

In a weak way. I was seeing only one or two ways to continue the conversation and was sticking with stories I've said to people before. That happens, of course, but it felt dry.
/r/seduction07/11/11 09:10 PM
1

Not a good comparison. Do all or many of those musicians think they are at the same level as everyone else (including complete non-musicians)? No, they don't, but that is the phenomenon he is describing.
/r/seduction07/11/11 05:37 PM
5

Either he is later interchangeably using the terms or he's saying that he pushes introverts as well who have grown only comfortable with the logic of books and self-reflection. I actually like what you quoted above quite a bit. He points out that "extroverts" (and here he decides to identify as one, not from birth but by habit) have to deal with the same unexpectedness. I think that's important. I think sometimes we say, "I can't" when more accurately we should say, "I feel uncomfortable with th…
/r/seduction07/11/11 12:47 AM
1

Also: I’m not saying introversion is “wrong” – there are things that people who spend all their time with others can’t appreciate about self-reflection, focused studying and even just down time to be quiet.
/r/seduction07/11/11 12:14 AM
4

from the article: Introversion and shyness are different (a ‘shy’ person may actually desperately want to be social, whereas an introvert takes more pleasure out of non-social interactions than extroverts would), but because the end result of less socialising is more or less the same they have a lot in common. I don't see what you are talking about.
/r/seduction07/11/11 12:11 AM
7

He does recognize there is variation, but he says most people are limiting themselves. I agree with him. I think many people are comparing themselves to unrealistic standards and repeating to themselves and to others that they are incapable of something when they actually are not. Yes, there some people that are suffering from crippling social anxiety and some autistic people that are left clueless. However, there seem to be many, many people who are limiting themselves. You can resist the very …
/r/seduction07/11/11 12:01 AM
8

I think he was doing more than yelling at them.
/r/seduction06/11/11 10:47 PM
1

I know what you mean. Not as reliable for me just yet. Doesn't always come instinctively.
/r/seduction04/11/11 11:16 PM
2

Thanks, brolio. I think I often mistake talking for connecting.
/r/seduction04/11/11 10:54 PM
1

Oh. I'd like to add thank you to TofuTofu for advising that we should ask a girl out within the first few messages on okc. I don't know if having built up more of a connection via messages beforehand would have actually been effective or important.
/r/seduction03/11/11 11:48 PM
3

Many monkeys wouldn't just say, "That's how it's done." They would have made up some reason to justify their behavior and why it's important.
/r/seduction30/10/11 06:07 AM
4

I've been hearing that a scale shouldn't be about how much you value her. That can hurt you. It's about how she feels she is valued. A hotter girl who knows she's hot (because guys treat her as so valuable so often) can be tougher to crack and may require a stronger approach.
/r/seduction29/10/11 02:53 AM
3

I think the dude challenged the OP(bartender) to knowing what drink the girl came over to order to prove that he met her before.
/r/seduction26/10/11 07:58 PM
2

Make sure you enjoy yourself. Trying to guess at what she has in mind or how she will react isn't important. I think that would be ideal.
/r/seduction19/10/11 05:56 PM
2

I often find some excuse, like other people are here and they'll be judging me and I'll feel uncomfortable. I think, in the end, not taking on the attitude of outcome independence is wanting to have more control than any of us ever have. Control- freaks. We must accept that we don't know everything about what will happen. We have to accept that thinking too far ahead isn't doing us any good. I'm tired of it.
/r/seduction19/10/11 03:34 AM
1

This is how I feel. Being able to hear the AFC and not believe him sounds like the concept of disidentification which I've read about in zen buddhism books.
/r/seduction19/10/11 03:29 AM
3

In Japan as a foreigner, you can expect the questions and replies you get to become pretty predictable. Use that to your advantage. You'll be able to reply in a funny interesting way because you'll be able to guess what questions are asked.
/r/seduction19/10/11 03:22 AM
1

Laugh if off. From the moment of whiskey-dick panic and onwards, laugh it off. You said you made her cum. She'll probably want to see you again.
/r/seduction12/10/11 10:28 PM
3

And FR's haven't been upvoted nearly enough. An FR shouldn't have less upvotes than a dude asking a question that's been asked a million times.
/r/seduction12/10/11 10:02 PM
13

You know you're a new man now. Ultimate test: PASSED!
/r/seduction11/10/11 09:58 PM
1

Yes, it can be. Just because a woman says something don't take it as gospel. I've had female friends be quite helpful in pointing things out.
/r/seduction10/10/11 02:18 AM
1

Nice. Instead of being sensitive to the shit test, you read the situation in a way indicating the best possibility.
/r/seduction09/10/11 05:28 AM
8

Skip the first 20 minutes.
/r/seduction09/10/11 04:50 AM
6

Picking Up while using Pro-Wrestling Catchphrases! Sometimes we forget to have fun, but maybe there's no better way to be attractive and to be outcome-independent than to ensure we have fun.
/r/seduction08/10/11 03:28 PM
3

Funny! Really shows there's nothing to fear at all. So much more you can get away with than you thought.
/r/seduction08/10/11 03:15 PM
5

Thanks. I wish I had danced. She was dancing and I love to dance.
/r/seduction07/10/11 03:22 AM
18

You didn't get exactly what you were looking for, but congratulations are in order. You went for it and you're moving on.
/r/seduction07/10/11 03:19 AM
2

:) I've been stallling on making some approaches and on setting up plans with some other girls. Thanks.
/r/seduction27/09/11 12:16 AM
2

I agree. I think we have a tendency to look for the right words when words aren't the solution. Can you suggest other things instead?
/r/seduction22/09/11 01:56 PM
2

I have improved and seen success, but I spent a long time being an AFC and I sometimes feel my default mode is AFC. I sometimes think, "If I talk to this girl or ask her out, I'm not going to know what to do." Currently, I live with my parents in a neighborhood I don't want to hang out in and I'm unemployed. Sometimes I feel bad for that. I'm still getting used to feeling comfortable leading, kino, and speaking in an unstifled way. My practice hasn't been consistent lately and it's been almost n…
/r/seduction22/09/11 01:28 AM
1

Be touchy. Pat my arms, hands, thighs, face, CHEST! Hold my hand sometimes. I might just say, "Let's get out of here" and lead you by the hand.
/r/seduction20/09/11 04:20 PM
3

I'm guessing it's one of those "if you make it seem weird, then it will feel weird" things. It can be an unusual social situation for whoever we're speaking to, but we if we lead like it's completely normal and something we often do because that's our world, then they'll follow our lead.
/r/seduction20/09/11 03:21 AM
5

Thanks. I don't think I ever totally cold-approached outside of a bar or club. I want to though.
/r/seduction20/09/11 03:13 AM
1

Maybe when they laugh off your request to be more serious, they think it's just game. Or their reaction is like another shit-test.
/r/seduction20/09/11 02:42 AM
1

Stay out of r/foreveralone.
/r/seduction19/09/11 02:51 PM
17

You missed number 5. Don't call a woman a "slut". You said you used to be into casual sex. Why can't she? Way to go on the rest though!
/r/seduction13/09/11 01:57 PM
11

If you ever felt like escalating was "out of the blue", this likely applies to you. Ohhh I know that feeling. In conversation Getting her relationship status early on Guide conversation to relationships / sex / personal relationship histories Make comments implying you two will hookup, get into a relationship, heck get married, etc (all semi-joking) Disqualify yourself from relationships which indirectly implies still hooking up Stories about girls you've hooked up with, exciting ones These some…
/r/seduction12/09/11 01:39 AM
3

I'm back in New York after several years away. I don't really know, but I'm trying to find out too. I plan on going out at almost any opportunity I'm invited. I'm not willing to settle for boring small-talk. That doesn't mean I'm always going to jump to deep serious topics. It means I'm going to be wiling to show myself in any interaction. I'm thinking these things will help.
/r/seduction09/09/11 01:42 PM
2

All I can do is applaud you.
/r/seduction09/09/11 04:45 AM
1

I recently left a small city where downtown I could walk around and see a number of familiar faces who I had chatted or drank with. Now, I'm in NYC. The other day, I was walking with my friend and a young cute woman very strongly said, "Hi!" and I looked at my friend like maybe she was someone he knew. After passing us, she said, "BYE!" I was weirded out by it. I think she was just weird about it. It seemed combative, instead of welcoming, and since it was so unexpected, I didn't know what to do…
/r/seduction09/09/11 01:42 AM
5

Thanks for getting into the details.
/r/seduction07/09/11 09:11 PM
2

Thanks
/r/seduction31/08/11 11:02 PM
9

Yeah, I hear ya. I think it's awesome that you've gone fearless about bringing them home. I live real far from where I hang out and don't want to bring strangers to my folks' home. Got any advice on getting them to invite you back?
/r/seduction31/08/11 09:14 PM
52

I don't want to bring any girls back to my parents' place. I want to get the girls to invite me back to their places.
/r/seduction31/08/11 08:38 PM
1

Absolutely! If kino and eye contact have been right, then at most I've said, "Hey" or "Come here" before escalating to kissing a girl. I mean, we were talking but never had to talk about kissing. From what I can tell, girls are really, really resistant to feeling like they've promised a guy anything. So, talking about a kiss doesn't seem to do anyone any favors. Maaaaaybe, if you know the girl is interested but both of you have been short on kino, then talking about kissing could be a way to cut…
/r/seduction27/08/11 04:11 AM
3

you are not your mind.
/r/seduction24/08/11 03:09 PM
2

Opening strangers. Early kino. Escalating to clear interest.
/r/seduction23/08/11 09:01 PM
46

This seems worth a try. More of a test of how much interest she initially has, but a natural opener still.
/r/seduction23/08/11 01:45 PM
9

one of people's great needs is to feel listened to.
/r/seduction23/08/11 02:40 AM
3

Often, I'm great at breaking through small-talk, but there was this one girl I developed a crush on and I didn't do it. We had the dumbest most pointless conversations. Looking back, I feel more confident that she liked me too, but I didn't lead things past facts and liking/not liking enough. Good advice here.
/r/seduction22/08/11 06:33 AM
11

I think laughing it off or raystanz's "Thank you for saving me the trouble of getting to know you" are best, but these could also be fun: "What a bitch!"- said quickly and with a rising intonation like, "What a twist!" gasp. Say, "Why I never..." and march off with your nose in the air. "I'm sorry I couldn't hear you." Make her repeat it. Then, shrug your shoulders and say, "Sorry, all I can hear is <mock her voice>'i'm a horrible person' "
/r/seduction22/08/11 03:35 AM
1

I believe he's wrong. I pray to my absent God that he's wrong. I don't want the woman he's describing.
/r/seduction22/08/11 12:45 AM
1

Dealing with? It's not a problem. Just try not to have a little boy's haircut. Also, don't dress like a grumpy frumpy teenager. When I was 22, I looked 12. Maybe use that babyface to get away with things that show you're not "just a nice guy".
/r/seduction01/08/11 07:27 AM
2

I don't see what you got so offended by. If you're really about helping out fellow PUAs you could have played like you really were a bodyguard. Do the ear-mic check thing. Come at the dudes friendly, if they still seem dickish, be done with them.
/r/seduction25/07/11 03:51 AM
1

This dude's a smooth operator. He suggests a number of things counter to the usual advice: Something other than "word vomit". I guess only to be used when wanting deep rapport. Emotions, Motivations, Characteristics (E=MC2 to help me remember it) Embraces the friend zone and says it's easy to get out of.
/r/seduction23/07/11 01:09 AM
1

Great recommendation. He said things counter to a lot of what is usually said, but it makes a lot of sense. I'm looking forward to trying it out.
/r/seduction22/07/11 03:02 PM
1

No, I want the abbreviations and details. A title like, ""I got AA but then I negged and eventually # closed" is very helpful. It helps me know whether it's an FR I want to read. Those abbreviations are simply words more carefully defined for our purposes here. If my current sticking point is AA and #-closing, then I know that FR is relevant. A well-written FR is nice. I understand concerns about objectification, but I find the terms used here to help with a sort of objectivity. Instead of "I wa…
/r/seduction19/07/11 12:18 AM
1

that's a great picture!
/r/seduction16/07/11 01:50 AM
3

Don't apologize for existing. Don't apologize for taking up space. Don't apologize for being heard. Don't apologize for being seen. Don't apologize for someone taking offense to something you think is true and did not intend to be hurtful. Avoid apologizing with your words but also with your body language, vocal tone, eye contact, speed of speech, volume of voice, etc.
/r/seduction15/07/11 03:52 AM
2

Thanks for sharing these stories. I've had female (and male) friends refer to my heart-breaking ex as a slut as well. I don't like it. I think calling someone her a liar is much worse and more accurate. if I wanted to sleep with many guys, I'd have to be quiet about it- because as soon as a guy finds out you're "easy" he's less likely to sleep with you. Fuck that. So you end up playing innocent. Ironically, you get laid more often that way. Very interesting!
/r/seduction14/07/11 05:11 AM
3

Where are our female sedditors? I'd really like to hear their thoughts on this including examples of being called a slut or being feared called a slut by men and women. Also, have you ever called a girl a slut?
/r/seduction14/07/11 12:19 AM
4

We should be doing everything we can to get rid of slut-shaming. It's hurtful and awful and it ain't making our lives easier either.
/r/seduction14/07/11 12:14 AM
2

Soooo what's the difference between you and a creepy dude? Is it all confident subcommunication?
/r/seduction13/07/11 12:04 AM
1

Sounds like the confident personality is more light-hearted. Go out not with the intention of connecting in deep ways with people but with teasing and joking. Another thing, you may be engaging in too much self-deprecation when you are talking as the "non-confident" self. Don't apologize for anything or sell yourself short.
/r/seduction11/07/11 10:30 PM
8

I'm really liking where seddit is going in inner game!
/r/seduction11/07/11 08:52 AM
2

You follow the Vin DiCarlo escalation ramp? That'll take you from makeout to sex.
/r/seduction10/07/11 11:59 AM
3

Tell us more about body rocking, please.
/r/seduction09/07/11 12:33 PM
2

A great summary! I nominate this to go into the sidebar. I had been reading about game for a long time. I knew the techniques at least in a textbook sense. I eventually was getting out more. I was going on some dates, but the biggest change came once I started working on inner game and having many of the revelations here in this summary. Then, the outer techniques I had read about became useful. I still have a ways to go. I'm just beginning to see the fruit of sorting out my inner game in this w…
/r/seduction09/07/11 11:22 AM
1

Thanks! I'll be living near NYC.
/r/seduction09/07/11 10:08 AM
1

I've been living in Japan but I'm leaving soon. 1) How do I build a social circle from scratch? 2) How do I meet J-girls back in the US? 3) How do I adjust for game back in the US?
/r/seduction09/07/11 06:43 AM
10

Being aware of all that stuff seems to be fine and I've talked to girls about it and they think about that shit too. Be aware but then don't give a fuck. Send whatever. Experiment. See what works. See what doesn't. Be surprised how quickly you can push things. Abundance mentality. I often type up a text and then say, "I don't give a fuck" and then send it.
/r/seduction06/07/11 01:19 PM
1

As I said, earlier. I wanted to try this. I just started. Sent an fb message to a girl and got a positive reply already. The IDGAF-ness of leaving soon is great.
/r/seduction03/07/11 12:45 PM
21

I read somewhere, "Is he good to you? I wouldn't be."
/r/seduction01/07/11 05:28 AM
3

I think I know what you mean. You can change and be the last person who thinks of yourself in the old way. I meet people now and they say they're shy and that I seem really good at socializing and meeting new people. I am! And yet, I still haven't fully let go of seeing myself as that shy guy who felt lost and frozen in a big group of people.
/r/seduction01/07/11 05:23 AM
3

Thanks for making me feel not crazy. I was with a girl last week and "I love you" was echoing in my head. I wasn't worried about killing attraction. I just knew it was wrong. We don't know each other nearly well enough and have no visible future together, but there were those words in my head.
/r/seduction29/06/11 01:02 AM
2

It may have been a request for slowness that came out in a form of testing and toying. Which reminds me, I have a question about "requests for slowness", where "no" means "not now" which can mean as soon as 30 seconds from now. My theory is that it's a test to see if the guy can react without getting angry and respect boundaries (maybe just momentarily). Is it a safety thing?
/r/seduction28/06/11 11:07 AM
2

Well, she just got out of a relationship and she knows i'm moving out of the country soon, so a one-night stand is the only option. Yeah, I think she wanted to see if she could push me around. I pulled back enough to avoid that, but too much to make anything more happen that night.
/r/seduction28/06/11 11:00 AM
1

Man, don't give up so easily. She just invited me to her bday party.
/r/seduction28/06/11 03:47 AM
1

I challenge her to it with the reward being a kiss, depending on who wins. She agrees in shock and claims this is a first. I put my arms around her and she puts her arms around my neck and I begin. I ask her the first question and she gives me the correct answer, stares at me in the eyes and begins to make out with me. So the questions didn't matter?
/r/seduction28/06/11 03:46 AM
2

I was at a party at a campground. I was walking her to the cabins, but the cabins appeared to be occupied.
/r/seduction28/06/11 03:03 AM
3

Anyway, yeah, I think your analysis is correct. Just got an fb message from her now, apologizing for being really drunk.
/r/seduction27/06/11 05:34 PM
5

I was trying to take her somewhere for that and she knew it, but verbalizing it would have been the deathknell I think. There wasn't anywhere to go though.
/r/seduction27/06/11 05:30 PM
2

I'm not so concerned about this one girl. Abundance mentality. But, I'm not completely giving up either. Actually, I've been thinking that it wasn't so much that I didn't impress her enough as she didn't feel she impressed me enough. I was showing physical interest without her having felt like she earned it. I think maybe if I would have drawn more out of her and escalated based on that (like Juggler says) that would have had a better response.
/r/seduction27/06/11 03:50 PM
2

Some kind of RSD Blueprint overview I think there's quite a bit of wisdom in here. Value yourself and take on the necessary beliefs.
/r/seduction27/06/11 03:29 PM
3

A number of sedditors, including me, are in Japan. The mod and rather legendary TofuTofu filed plenty of field reports from Japan and often said that he didn't find much difference in different cultures.
/r/seduction27/06/11 03:07 PM
3

I'm finding that I used to be way too concerned about my words. Now I tease, say whatever comes to mind, and don't supplicate. Body language and kino seem to be a channel of communication that is much more effective that was invisible to me. Don't hold your drink in front of your body!
/r/seduction27/06/11 02:33 PM
1

I had just read it too and thought of posting it in seddit. It's interesting. I hope it encourages people not to feel ashamed or damaged for being shy or introverted, but I hope it doesn't let them settle for only expressing those traits. My biggest problem with all the talk about introversion lately is that then people say, "Oh I am an introvert. That's who I am. I'll never enjoy larger social situations or make friends easily." Rather than seeing how much variety of expression and experience i…
/r/seduction27/06/11 02:23 AM
2

Sweet. Thanks. I've found that disagreeing with people often makes for more interesting conversations. What you say about abundance mentality is showing itself to me more and more. When I'm advancing things with a handful of girls, I'm much more likely to speak freely and tease ad not worry about any one girl or interaction.
/r/seduction24/06/11 02:06 AM
1

Thanks for this. I don't have the Blueprint but the more I encounter their stuff, the more solid and insightful it seems. Any examples of values and how they drive behavior? Examples of exercises of finding values and methods to make them stronger?
/r/seduction23/06/11 02:27 AM
11

Women don't seem to be as binary about finding a man attractive. Some seem like they can be in a gray-area for a while giving IOIs but would never admit it verbally. Assuming attraction is not only the best bet. It also makes you act like a guy who expects to be considered attractive and that leads to being seen as attractive.
/r/seduction23/06/11 01:40 AM
2

Another babyface here. I don't think it hurts me except for when I unconsciously play it as my identity, when I let it limit how I express myself. Other than that, it's probably harder for me to appear creepy. There are lots of famous babyfaces women love.
/r/seduction20/06/11 07:20 AM
15

I read this years ago and it's worth reading again.
/r/seduction17/06/11 12:09 AM
2

Man, thanks for sharing. I think "introversion" is just an excuse that introverts use so they can feel more comfortable being forever alone. I used to be pretty introverted too, but I fuckin changed it because I didn't allow myself to fall into that mindset. I agree! Often on reddit, people talk about introversion like it's most certainly an inherent, immutable thing and seem really resistant to the possibility it may be a self-limiting belief. I most definitely had fit the definition of introve…
/r/seduction16/06/11 03:53 AM
1

Specifically, how did you change your mentality in a week? I'm very interested in inner game.
/r/seduction16/06/11 02:54 AM
2

Then, thanks. I don't want a girlfriend though, especially not one who just cheated on her boyfriend. I've done that before. The outcome was predictable to everyone but me.
/r/seduction13/06/11 05:48 AM
1

I think there's plenty of morals here, but I'm currently not a good example.
/r/seduction13/06/11 05:37 AM
1

I'm afraid you're sending me a well-deserved virus.
/r/seduction13/06/11 05:30 AM
7

Bitchez love Mulan. Correction: Everyone loves Mulan.
/r/seduction13/06/11 05:29 AM
2

I don't see the problem. Introduce yourself anyway if you want. Give yourself a nickname if you want.
/r/seduction13/06/11 05:21 AM
11

I think it would be funny to start singing, get excited, have fun and then quickly say, "Nah. I hate that shit." I'm not saying that I think it would attract them, just that it would be funny.
/r/seduction13/06/11 05:17 AM
1

I'm surprised. I don't know. Tease them?
/r/seduction13/06/11 05:14 AM
1

White people wanting to touch your hair can get annoying. However, the girls that touch your hair are likely showing interest and wanted an excuse to touch you. Touch them.
/r/seduction13/06/11 04:13 AM
1

Muchas gracias for the feedback! I hadn't considered that about Girl 2 at all.
/r/seduction07/06/11 09:46 AM
6

That part in the middle about "deserve you" seems to sadly be true.
/r/seduction05/06/11 08:28 AM
3

Physical Push Pull(PPP) does. TofuTofu uses and encourages it.
/r/seduction05/06/11 06:26 AM
2

Doing this then makes Juggler's later use of questions much stronger. His method involves dropping a big open-ended question (one that demands investment from the girl) and staring until she answers it. No qualifying it or "for example..."
/r/seduction03/06/11 01:03 AM
2

How do you usually escalate? And how do you ensure you escalate despite any anxiety?
/r/seduction01/06/11 03:10 AM
1

What are some specific innergame actions/excercises one can do to truly integrate helpful beliefs into one's mindset?
/r/seduction01/06/11 03:06 AM
7

Well, you came here for something.
/r/seduction31/05/11 07:42 AM
1

Some people suggest turning your thoughts to something else you're passionate about- a hobby, a creative outlet, etc. The book Intimate Connections is often recommended. I've found that even trying to repeat thru my day a positive phrase in my head has helped make me aware of how often in little ways I was letting negative thoughts arise unquestioned. The conflict between my conscious positive thoughts made my negative unconscious thoughts become more visible, so I was more ready to dismiss or c…
/r/seduction31/05/11 05:29 AM
1

Those are the thoughts that need to be countered.
/r/seduction31/05/11 03:11 AM
1

are you afraid you might think badly of yourself if the outcome isn't ideal? that's more of what i mean. separate yourself from the outcome by trusting that you will think well of yourself no matter the outcome.
/r/seduction31/05/11 01:29 AM
1

I'm learning too, but I say trust that you will be there for yourself. No matter the outcome, choose to love yourself (unconditionally) and praise yourself for your efforts. Be aware you have a choice over your thoughts. Start replacing negative thoughts about yourself with positive ones. When you find negative thoughts popping up, DO NOT BLAME YOURSELF OR THINK THAT BECAUSE THEY EXIST THEY ARE CORRECT, just choose positive thoughts again and praise yourself through the efforts you make.
/r/seduction31/05/11 12:25 AM
1

Thanks for the reminder. It's true but I often forget. There have been times when I was rejected and I laughed it off and thought little of it, but there have been so many times when, as you say, "projected rejection", has factored too much in my decision-making.
/r/seduction30/05/11 02:51 AM
3

Thanks for sharing the fail, man. I need more rejection and I've been thinking that I think I can face more rejection if I have an idea of how I would react. I want to laugh it off like you did.
/r/seduction30/05/11 01:47 AM
1

Patrick Bateman is a sociopath. Good Guy Greg is the alpha you're looking for.
/r/seduction30/05/11 12:17 AM
1

Yeah, I haven't heard from her.
/r/seduction26/05/11 12:53 AM
9

It seems you like him because you feel he has what you don't. Get those things for yourself. Don't worry about "leagues". Feel free to talk to him about him those goals and what's motivating him. Then, give opportunities. Eye contact, tease, touch.
/r/seduction24/05/11 02:55 AM
2

I have a hard time "assuming attraction" with girls I already know. This seems to be it. You have all these questions in which you're trying to guess what this girl is thinking. Take the lead. I'm guessing that's what a more experienced man than myself would say.
/r/seduction23/05/11 12:23 AM
1

Really good reminder. I've often not been persistent because I wasn't sure if she was interested in me. I should be more focused on if I'm interested in her. And with all this knowledge of seduction and the wily ways of women, realize that it's pretty much a given that if I ever don't Assume Attraction there will be times when I'm not sure if she's interested.
/r/seduction19/05/11 12:20 AM
1

I was that too, but I'm talking about more than that. I'm talking about I've heard of women making the first move and the men reject it.
/r/seduction17/05/11 03:47 AM
1

I think some have lost their sex drive. I've heard of a few Japanese men who aren't gay who have women in their bed and still won't go for it. It's baffling, but it's happening. The only other explanation I can think of is that their self-esteem is so low that they are afraid but are pretending to be disinterested.
/r/seduction17/05/11 01:25 AM
3

/r/sex seems to be a lot of people with problems looking for answers. I think seddit could benefit from sharing sex tips and maybe that could lead seeing more of the connection between seduction and sex. How do we better communicate early on that we are good sexual partners?
/r/seduction14/05/11 05:59 AM
1

Right!
/r/seduction13/05/11 07:54 AM
5

I'm leaving Japan soon too. I wonder if I can line them up and knock them down too.
/r/seduction11/05/11 07:45 AM
1

Sheeeeit. This ain't my first time on seddit. I know better than to buy drinks for a girl's time. I think she ended up buying two rounds after I bought the first. I had no place. I was out of town and I knew the hotel I was staying at wouldn't allow ne to bring a guest.
/r/seduction06/05/11 11:52 AM
1

Wisdom.
/r/seduction30/04/11 04:16 AM
2

Honestly, I don't remember. There was no awkward silence or chewing out. I didn't say it angrily. I said it firmly but with one of many elbow nudges during the night. I don't know if saying that helped things for sure. But, I do know that I didn't want her to just get away with disqualifying me by saying I'm "too sweet" while talking very freely about sexual things. Later in the night, just before we kissed while talking about impressions of each other, I brought up that she said I was "too swee…
/r/seduction24/04/11 06:07 AM
1

Well, she had asked me about my goals within the next few months before I leave this country. I mentioned how important my friends are to me and that I want to make sure they know that before we separate. Soon after that, I asked her who her closest friends. She was a bit hesitant, saying that I probably didn't know them. Then, I asked her what words her friends would use to describe her. I think this can be great for connecting because maybe she thinks her friends would be wrong with a few word…
/r/seduction24/04/11 06:01 AM
2

No, I didn't know them. They were a couple of young sleepy guys sitting nearby. Right after the first kiss, they perked up with a "whooooo!" and started chatting with the girl and she moved over and started talking with them. They said they were firefighters and they knew where she worked. She asked if they were brothers. I lightly teased them that they looked alike because they have the same haircut. I was friendly with them and soon the girl was back next to me, talking, and kissing. When she …
/r/seduction24/04/11 05:55 AM
2

1) A virgin well into my 20s, I discovered the seduction community soon after The Game was published. I read it and some other material out there, but didn't really try to apply much of it except Juggler's method. With some changes in my life, I soon had a girlfriend. After about a year and a half, she left me heartbroken and feeling betrayed. I've spent a lot of time since then trying to pick myself up and trying to see how I could allow someone else's actions to hurt me so much. Finding seddit…
/r/seduction20/04/11 02:39 PM
3

I think what you say will prove to be helpful. There's no use in me thinking I can read someone else's mind. I know mine though.
/r/seduction18/04/11 03:54 AM
2

Yes, it sure is.
/r/seduction18/04/11 03:51 AM
4

I'm looking at the advice in this thread. I'm working on kino, but I haven't gone past arm, shoulder, and leg taps in a while. It's not necessary though. I think I hooked with my last gf without any kino leading up to her being ready for the kiss.
/r/seduction17/04/11 03:41 PM
3

I'm not gay. I'm not nonsexual.
/r/seduction17/04/11 03:30 PM
3

I don't know if I'm very afraid of being rejected or seen as a creeper. Last fall, there were some girls I tried to kiss and I was rejected, but they weren't jerks about it and I laughed it off. I think I could still do that. I think I feel like it's coming out of nowhere. I can see they're attracted to me. Hell, even other people are telling me these girls seem into me. I think if there was more eye contact and kino I would feel more comfortable. That shouldn't matter to me so much, but I'm gue…
/r/seduction17/04/11 03:25 PM
1

I know I laugh a lil' too much. I think having a big free laugh at truly funny things is great. Laughing at her is good too. Small nervous laughs in reaction to almost everything doesn't seem to help.
/r/seduction15/04/11 06:33 AM
1

Thanks! I was making progress, then felt like I hit a wall. I keep making excuses around not leading. I needed this reminder. They're waiting for me.
/r/seduction15/04/11 05:17 AM
2

So what has helped in particular? Better inner game? Just seeing from others' FRs that alpha behavior works?
/r/seduction12/04/11 08:02 AM
2

Peacocking can also be wearing something that gets interested girls to open you. It doesn't have to be ridiculous, but it can stand out a bit. Maybe it's a brighter color or an interesting accessory.
/r/seduction11/04/11 07:22 AM
2

Sounds exactly like my problem. I think we need to look at the assumptions. It shows intent? That's actually a good thing isn't it. We're afraid it's awkward? 1) That only matters if we make it awkward. And even then it doesn't matter worth a shit. 2) That's too much concern about the outcome. I really want to get past this shit.
/r/seduction07/04/11 01:14 AM
1

It wasn't me. (Then, who was picture frame?) I see. I want to get past this daygame sticking point. I'd be proud of failure, at least then I'd know I was in the game.
/r/seduction06/04/11 05:58 AM
1

I really, really want to try this. Haven't gathered the courage yet to do much daygame though. It's killing me that I haven't. What would you do differently next time? Is this a case of lots of attraction but not enough comfort? In need of a smoother transition to suggesting the wine at your place? Would suggesting that the two of you just go to pick up a bottle of wine from your place rather than drinking at your place less objectionable?
/r/seduction06/04/11 05:45 AM
2

I think what I find most amazing is that it took her that long to ask you where you're from. That seems so atypical of interactions with strangers in Japan. Before you approached her, had you two made eye contact or did you just surprise her? Was there anything about her that made you think she would be more interested in a daygame snl? Your words are innocuous, so there's nothing verbal for her to object to or feel uncomfortable about. This meant you had to rely on body language The switch to t…
/r/seduction06/04/11 05:21 AM
3

I've been thinking along the same lines as I learn Japanese. There's plenty of opportunities and peers offering excuses you can subscribe to like, "i'm too old to learn" or "i don't have a good memory" or "i can learn to read but not listen." Also makes sense of a few of the top puas here being fluent in Japanese. They don't let limiting beliefs get in the way and because they are internally validated, they're not afraid to make the mistakes (private and public) to learn the language. From what …
/r/seduction06/04/11 05:05 AM
3

from the forum thread: "It is knowing how to be in control without being controlling... Of understanding that she loves to feel your guidance, your confidence in yourself, that you have the ability to look at her and she feels sexy, you touch her and she reacts, you speak to her and she leans closer." I'm not doing any girls any favors by being indecisive. I'm not doing ANYONE any favors by being indecisive...or by not showing confidence. When I show my confidence, I have more to give. To be loo…
/r/seduction05/04/11 04:53 PM
1

I meant if you initiated kino, what did you expect to happen in return, but that doesn't seem to apply here. Thank you for the detailed answer.
/r/seduction04/04/11 07:19 AM
1

most importantly, his kino-skills improved a lot. Please give more detail on this, including your reaction. Have you found yourself immediately reciprocating? With what sorts of kino? Have you found yourself initiating kino too? What were you expecting?
/r/seduction03/04/11 05:52 PM
1

Yes. Leading conversations needs work. This is something I can work on throughout the day with many people who aren't "targets".
/r/seduction29/03/11 03:49 PM
2

I'm not in the Tokyo area, but next time I'm out there I want to find you guys.
/r/seduction29/03/11 03:35 PM
2

I try to remember that I might as well be happy. I have a choice in the matter and I'm choosing to be happy.
/r/seduction26/03/11 06:18 AM
1

I like how you turned the very excuses that could have kept you from #-closing into the means of your success.
/r/seduction23/03/11 06:50 AM
1

That's a great link. Great way to present a lot of information and the part about protests and The Emperor Wears No Clothes made sense of something I've been missing. Thanks. I've had a lot of internal resistance to excuses and indirect language. Beyond it not working, this gave me a good reason to drop that resistance and have some excuses prepped for next time.
/r/seduction21/03/11 06:45 PM
6

She tries to insult him with sexual insults and he embraces it, adding to the sexual tension. She says "stick your thumb up your ass", he shows his thumb. She says, "blow yourself", he looks at his crotch.
/r/seduction06/03/11 08:05 AM
1

Thanks. I've ignored her LJBF message and I haven't contacted her. I'm tempted to use RedErin's response though.
/r/seduction23/01/11 07:10 AM
3

I disagree. It's a way to show one's awesome actions and attitudes. Posting too much has the opposite effect. Besides, it's a way for me to interact with my friends and why should I let the opinion of someone who is merely an fb friend affect that?
/r/seduction11/01/11 04:26 AM
6

No, more FRs from Japan, please! This is great. My Japanese isn't as good as yours, but you actually played dumb. Had you done pickup in Japanese before you were fluent?
/r/seduction10/01/11 04:04 PM
4

Why did you take that girl home at that time? Were you just drunk enough to go for it?
/r/seduction10/01/11 05:27 AM
1

Thanks.
/r/seduction08/01/11 08:04 PM
1

i felt like i knew what to do, but i wasn't doing it because it would have felt unfamiliar and risky.
/r/seduction08/01/11 07:51 PM
1

I guess any good answer does come down to that.
/r/seduction08/01/11 07:36 PM
3

Yes. I read some pick-up stuff before that relationship though. That relationship came to me without much trying. I used some pua conversational principles, but that's it. Not even kino. Now, post-heartbreak, I'm finding it much harder than I thought it would be to find other girls. I'm getting better though. Seddit is a great help.
/r/seduction08/01/11 05:40 AM
1

No, not offtopic. This is great for a beginner. Avoiding oneitis and being unafraid of rejection seems to be a benefit of working on several women at once. It makes me bolder (willing to face rejection) and I'm not hung up on any one woman's reactions. And things are coming together. The single girl started texting me late last night. I teased her and she said she's "a bad girl". I'm going to take note of the mindset you've outlined here. Thanks again!
/r/seduction16/07/10 12:18 AM
1

Thank you for the encouragement.
/r/seduction15/07/10 12:05 AM
1

So, here's the update in case you're interested. Expecting nothing from the night seemed to be correct. The married one never left us alone, not even for a bathroom break though they were here for 4 and a half hours. They lingered. Both of them continually finding things in my place to talk about even 30 minutes after they were surprised it was midnight already. I used a little kino. Something that is often a sticking point for me, so I'm glad of that. Could not get any significant eye contact, …
/r/seduction14/07/10 04:13 PM
1

Actually, thanks a lot.
/r/seduction13/07/10 12:36 AM
1

That's what I figure too. Wondering what I can do to get some private time with the single one on the same night? Are there ways I can escalate even while the married one is there? Can I use that as a barrier to build up tension against, as Juggler suggests?
/r/seduction12/07/10 10:25 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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