| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 7 | Ex having baby todayNot so easy when you’re still trying to coparent. | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/04/23 06:27 PM |
| 1 | The BEST parts about being divorcedThe thing that resonates with me here is the concept of ALL OF THEM. All the time. My XW and in-laws: 6 siblings plus the parents, then the SOs, and then the kids. It wasn’t Disney trips because they were too good for that. But twice every week for dinner. With ALL OF THEM. And the beach houses in Maine and mountain lodges in Lake Placid. And the drama and fighting between all the siblings and cousins. I once left a vacation in the middle of an ice storm on NYE because I couldn’t take them anymo… | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/03/23 02:11 AM |
| 3 | Happy Sockiversary To MeMostly custody scheduling due to after school activities. Some bad communication between me and the ex, and her trying to start drama. I don’t let it get to me as much any more. | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/02/23 06:28 PM |
| 1 | What did you do with your old wedding band?I think it cost maybe $200. At that point, I just didn’t care! | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/01/23 07:41 PM |
| 5 | What did you do with your old wedding band?I left the band in my car’s coin tray during the separation, just forgot all about it. Found it just before the divorce was finalized, but still didn’t know what to do with it. After I got the email from the mediator saying it was over, I got really drunk and FaceTimed a college buddy. He talked me into walking across the street to the neighborhood fishing hole, where I ceremoniously tossed the ring to its watery grave. I think I saved the video of that glorious moment. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/01/23 07:39 PM |
| 2 | Ex PregnantI said “Thanks for letting me know.” Then she said “I hope I didn’t upset you.” She was clearly trying to get a reaction out of me and I wouldn’t give it to her. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/01/23 07:07 PM |
| 5 | Ex PregnantI thought a lot about this. No fucking way. It hasn’t come up yet, but there’s no way I will accept any “responsibility” for it, babysitting or otherwise. I honestly don’t think she would be stupid enough to think I will have anything to do with it, just like I won’t have anything to do with his 2 kids. Their trailer park, their monkeys. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/01/23 09:52 PM |
| 18 | Ex PregnantShe informed me via text. It took every ounce of my being to NOT reply with either positive or negative emotions. Riding high on the grey rock. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/01/23 02:26 PM |
| 4 | Peace after divorceThat’s not really what I meant or intended by this post. My current girlfriend is by no means perfect and nor do I think my relationship is perfect. I’m just glad that I found something healthy as opposed to the toxic relationship I had with my ex. That is all. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/12/22 04:44 PM |
| 1 | Peace after divorceWe are taking it slow. I was probably not ready for a relationship when we started dating, and was definitely still “in a cloud”. I think I have, thanks to a good therapist and the occasional advice from this group, really turned my outlook around. And gf has given me the space to find this with no expectations or demands. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/12/22 01:07 PM |
| 8 | LotteryGood to know. Not that I won anything! Currently no alimony in my divorce agreement and guessing/hoping that would stay the same as well. My plan would be to quit my job and buy a house closer to my 2 daughters, so I could request 50/50 and possibly reduce my child support. Plus create college trust funds for my daughters, so that would be taken care of. Just wanted to make sure I wouldn’t be stuck funding my ex! Who am I kidding? Divorcing her is the closest I’ll ever get to winning the lottery… | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/11/22 10:00 PM |
| 3 | I want to abandon my childrenThis is exactly why I keep replying here. To let others know that they are not alone. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/10/22 10:24 PM |
| 27 | I want to abandon my childrenGoing through similar. I was at the lowest point with my kids about 6 months ago. I will always have the belief that my ex has been “poisoning” them against me and was causing much of these issues, but she continues to play the faultless victim. I was at the point of abandoning the girls when they told me point blank that they didn’t want to see me anymore or want me in their lives at all. I gave them space (a couple months away) and then went right back to the consistency of our custody agreeme… | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/10/22 12:56 PM |
| 4 | 1 yearDon’t give up hope! I almost did, but continued sending them messages of encouragement. I didn’t think they would come around as fast as they did, but they actually admitted to treating me poorly because of information she was giving them. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/06/22 08:45 PM |
| 3 | Sock Day came and wentEXACTLY. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/02/22 03:53 PM |
| 3 | Sock Day came and wentAgreed, and thanks for the reminder. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/02/22 02:36 PM |
| 1 | Sock Day came and wentGood advice! We already had that discussion once to get it out of the way. Only interested in being the real me now, and surprisingly she’s genuinely interested in that person. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/02/22 01:09 PM |
| 2 | Guilt of SplurgingI try hard to keep the splurges to a minimum. And I try to focus on “things” that will actually have long term positive effects on ME. Without someone else’s absurd rationalizations about why this or that is a good or bad purchase, I get to use MY realistic approach to deciding what to spend on. As far as expensive hobbies go, I spend a lot of my free time collecting and listening to records. I don’t necessarily need to track down rare recordings, or super deluxe new reissues; I get just as much… | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/02/22 12:31 PM |
| 4 | “Triggered” by House HuntersWho f’in cares? Just pick one… | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/02/22 11:59 PM |
| 3 | Full moons, long weekends & holidays - a friendly reminder2 & 3 were my main problems for the past few weeks. Last week I subconsciously turned my attitude around, and this past weekend with the kids was like a completely different, healthy relationship. Don’t let yourself respond to emotional situations with your own unchecked emotions! | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/12/21 12:27 PM |
| 2 | Things I’ve Done On My OwnHang in there! It’s going to take some time, different for everyone depending on what’s really going on with your STBX. But you will become stronger and it will get better. | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/11/21 11:32 AM |
| 2 | Things I’ve Done On My OwnDude! I just left the door to the deck open for a minute and thought “oh well, no cats to get out and no bugs to bug the ex”. I’m more of a friend of Jim (Beam), but cheers! | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/11/21 03:10 AM |
| 3 | Things I’ve Done On My Own100%! | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/11/21 02:50 PM |
| 9 | Things I’ve Done On My OwnYes, man! | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/11/21 06:04 AM |
| 1 | Health InsuranceI hope that’s the case. I haven’t heard anything from the mediator yet but will try to clarify all that when she sends the consent form to prepare the divorce decree. | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/11/21 06:01 PM |
| 1 | Health InsurancePerfect. This is exactly what I was looking for. | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/10/21 03:02 AM |
| 2 | What are the most important things to consider during ‘parenting time’ mediation?Wish I had seen this a few months ago. Never considered a couple of these points, and although I don’t have any regrets at the moment, I can see the potential for future problems. 10 could have been a problem with us initially because she refused to back me up if the kids complained about going to my apartment, but now they look forward to overnights with me. | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/10/21 01:17 AM |
| 10 | Divorce from BPDHang on man. They (pwBPD) do some serious damage. You’re worth so much more than they made you out to be. Stick with the therapy. And new hobbies. | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/08/21 12:36 AM |
| 4 | Just Need to VentIt will get better. Different story for me, but here are the similarities: she has been in denial since I told her I wanted a divorce. Been through the mattress in the basement thing for a month. Had a couple sessions with a mediator (finalizing the separation agreement shortly) and I’ve been in an apartment for 2 months now. She is also from a wealthy family, and I am not. They are now starting to make it difficult as she and they have moved to the anger stage. But we just got a solid offer on … | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/08/21 02:39 AM |
| 3 | Do the arguments with the ex wife ever stop? After four years the argument today was about me getting them the Covid vaccine. It just never stops, any chance she can attack she does.Yeah thanks for the reminder. Sometimes I stay strong with the grey rock method, but tonight I got defensive and argued back. Now my blood pressure is back up and I can’t let my anger go. | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/08/21 12:18 AM |
| 2 | Bad vibes in old house, but regret leaving itSame feelings. We bought this house 6 years ago, and less than a year after that I realized it was a money pit. And nothing I ever did was good enough and nothing any contractor ever did was good enough. When I dropped the bomb, she initially said she wanted to keep the house. I said “That’s fine, good luck.” 2 days later she said “I think we should sell it.” (I will always wonder who made her see the light.) So here we are in a seller’s market, selling it “as is” and about to sell at $80-100k m… | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/06/21 02:55 AM |
| 3 | Divorce freed me (update)This was awesome to read! Thanks! | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/06/21 02:39 AM |
| 1 | Bad vibes in old house, but regret leaving itYou’re living the dream, my friend. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/06/21 11:12 PM |
| 3 | Spycams vs. Voice RecorderHow tech savvy is she? “If” I was to need something like this, I would pick something like this (looks like a USB charger in an outlet). USB charger This doesn’t do sound…never mind. Audio only - Keychain | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/06/21 01:58 AM |
| 1 | Lose kids?They “hate” her when she has unrealistic expectations of them. They “hate” her when she screams at them for the smallest little infractions. It’s typical “kids” stuff but it’s part of the same reasons I’m leaving her - no sense being stuck in constant circular arguments. She can’t be reasoned with and she always has to be right, and she takes everything way too personally. We’ve all lost the ability to communicate with each other. And it’s unhealthy. It took me 2 weeks to finally start being vul… | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/06/21 01:46 PM |
| 1 | Lose kids?I’m just starting the process, and not quite in the same situation as you, but I have 2 girls - 10 & 11. Was terrified of how to tell them, how they would react and feel about all this. Well, kids are aware of way more than you think. Their response was “Good. We knew this was coming.” They’ve gone back and forth with hating me and not wanting to have anything to do with me, and hating my STBXW. Right now, it’s stuck on the hating me side, and I feel like I’m losing them. Still trying to hold on… | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/06/21 01:38 PM |
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