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creamtart_ Archive

View 2 posts and 1,404 comments by creamtart_ on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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98

Any man that suggests surrogacy as an option is a resounding hell fucking no from me. Women are not wombs-for-hire. I don’t give a shit about these privileged libfems who ree about their first world magical surrogacy experience and how they made “sooo much money”. Most surrogacy is exploitation of vulnerable women. The fact that that was even an idea in his head is concerning. Not to mention, he is clearly insecure if he plans on living vicariously through one of his children by overworking them…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/22 02:59 AM
13

That sounds exhausting! I would just be making my food how I want it and he gotta suck it up and deal. Food pickiness was drilled out of us kids growing up. I was raised with the “if you don’t eat the food I cooked, you don’t eat” mentality by my mother, and I am grateful for it! 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/22 12:04 AM
51

Oh my gosh yes!!! These guys are the ones that are ALWAYS “bulking”, will dissect and criticise your routine, but you never actually see them hit the gym because of a mysterious “injury” that never seems to heal. Or my favourite, they hit the gym once in a blue moon, wearing the most ridiculous kit as if they’re Olympic lifters, walking around like they’re huge, do one single rep and then go find and tell the most athletic guy that his form is wrong. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/04/22 12:42 PM
140

He can’t coordinate colours and looks like he’s overweight trying to pose in way to hide how fat he actually is. Scrote clearly hits the takeout harder than he does his alleged cardio/lifting routine. Yeah right buddy, more like he sprints to the door to collect his delivery and keeps lifting those pizza slices into his gullet. We don’t even need to roast this guy, factually describing his profile is enough to make it clear how much of a joke he is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/04/22 12:28 PM
57

Some questions should not be skirted around, this is one of them. Be clear and direct about this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/22 03:37 AM
270

That seems weirdly aggressive. If that’s meant to be cute, I must be missing something.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/22 01:22 AM
3

Yes, you can listen on the podcasts app. There’s a link through acast that connects to apple podcasts, you just need to give permission to that first for access.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/22 12:03 AM
90

I feel like we’re missing a whole load of info, but I’ll tell you this and hopefully it helps you. I have made the mistake of ignoring my aunties or mother’s advice when they saw straight through a scrote I was dating. They always ended up being right. Now I treasure the wisdom and insight of older women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/04/22 11:50 PM
10

Not trying to be harsh or anything but just asking bc you’re a mod. Do you know if this is going to be a regular thing? Paid content eventually being released for free? I’m a paying subscriber and love supporting the cause but if this is going to be the case, may as well wait till the episodes are released, ya know?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/04/22 12:11 AM
8

Wasn’t this already on the pod?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/22 08:07 AM
5

Because according to a specific brand of “activist”, the feefees of the perpetrator is more important than the trauma of the victim.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/22 08:00 AM
65

Hmm… I disagree that it’s a HV perspective that thinking BJs are degrading. That’s a madonna/whore complex if I ever did see it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/04/22 11:07 AM
74

Are you me? I was expected to clean the whole house from age 12, and I mean CLEAN, not cutesy little chores that teach children independence. Years later after I moved out I saw that my younger brother was given an allowance for doing 1% of what I did (he cleaned his own room and did his own laundry). Yep. Not bitter at all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/04/22 02:18 AM
89

My ex literally says jokes/observations I have stated and made up, claiming it as his own. These bland kinds of scrotes don’t have their own identity so they appropriate everyone else’s. A lack of personality is what happens when the only thing you spend your time on is video games and porn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/22 07:09 AM
241

It’s a harsh truth, but it’s exactly that- the truth. It’s a socialised behaviour for men to pursue and take initiative. No matter how much libfems claim that women should lead, there is a lack of equality between the sexes, so there will always be a serious power imbalance in a relationship lead by a woman. These socialised behaviours run DEEP, so the best we can aim for is an EQUITABLE relationship that is initiated by a man. Again, a sucky truth to admit: women are the gatekeepers of sex, men…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/22 03:49 AM
24

You and me both sis. Radfems think I’m too liberal and libfems think I’m too radical. I’ll always be radfem leaning and sure, my views and values will be subject to scrutiny, but that doesn’t worry me because nothing matters to me more than achieving maximum benefit for women. I found my people when I found FDS 🥲
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/04/22 01:37 PM
22

Decisions aren’t made in a vacuum. Nothing we do is done for ourselves. Every single decision you have ever made has been influenced by someone somehow. Everyone wants some sort of validation. Maybe she’s insecure and relies on external validation from strangers which is super unhealthy, or maybe she’s healthy and sharing her story to try and uplift other women to be their best selves. Who knows.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/04/22 01:09 PM
53

Whilst I agree with much of your point, this is not a separatist subreddit. It is about female DATING strategy. Part of that involves grooming practices that will inevitably appeal to the opposite sex because while self-respect comes above all, ultimately, some us want to attract a decent guy that we do want to date. It’s a shitty truth to admit and I’ll acknowledge that. That we perform femininity and no decision is made in a vacuum, female socialisation has forced this on us, etc. You know wha…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/04/22 12:55 PM
3

Thanks, I’m glad you can see the problem too. It’s the entitled subscribers who refuse to read the rules and hold themselves accountable, yet expect HVM when they have done nothing to level themselves up. They then go and coddle/enable other women who have done no work on themselves and have the audacity to be offended when they are called out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/22 10:05 PM
-5

I don’t know if my post is FDS compliant. This irks me. You expect the women to help you out in a community that you don’t even bother to do the bare minimum and read the rules. You also admit that you asked for advice previously on FDS that you didn’t listen to. That’s really unfair on the women here who make an effort to give you quality advice and insights. Stop being an askhole.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/22 09:13 AM
40

This makes so much sense. Most movies are just so dumb and boring these days. No nuance or respect for the audience to figure shit out themselves. Everything is explained for the audience and overly simplified.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/04/22 12:40 AM
87

Came here to say: the signs are never subtle.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/22 02:15 AM
117

Ding ding ding! We have a winner! These scrotes want to keep gaslighting women by making them give toxic men a chance. Then when those toxic men abuse the women, they blame the women saying “she should have known better!”. Then when the woman levels up and enters a relationship with a healthy, decent man she’s told she’s heartless for not giving the supposedly underdog “nice guy” a chance. It’s a never ending cycle of women being blamed for the actions of men. We will always be scrutinised for e…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/22 12:24 AM
168

I’ll take the jacked athletic “square” any day! Like what do these scrotes expect women to say? “Oh no, this man is fit and hot, but also has decent values and morals. How can I ever live with that? Woe is me.” Scrotes be telling on themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/22 10:21 PM
119

I can guarantee you were one of many women he was sending that to. You deserve better than a dick pic sis. ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/22 02:33 AM
44

This is so accurate. And there’s a weird description of how our clothing sits against our breasts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/22 09:18 PM
123

It’s all a cope. You’ll notice it’s the uggos that have a problem with women who have standards. I am yet to meet a man who takes care of himself have a problem with women with physical/grooming standards. Hot guys don’t care about shit like that because they too look for women who take care of themselves. It’s all about values aligning and compatibility.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/22 11:25 AM
53

He made a choice to get stoned and pass out instead of choosing to see you. That is where you sit on his priority list. Let that tell you everything you need to know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/22 08:21 AM
110

It frustrates me that there are always women willing to be handmaidens and shills for the patriarchy. More women need to stand up to these guys and tell them to grow a backbone instead of palming off the legwork onto a woman.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/22 02:52 AM
142

Words I live by: better to be a bitch than a pushover.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/22 12:13 AM
374

If a man is turned off your confidence and boundaries, he is telling on himself and is absolutely the wrong kind of man for you. A healthy and self-assured man is attracted to those qualities and sees them as strengths.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/22 11:59 PM
54

L/Z/NVM are value-diggers. Every moment we spend with them drains our life force leaving us with less value than we started with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/22 07:32 AM
161

If you have to ask this question, you know the answer. As people grow and mature, they update their social media and get rid of trashy immature shit bc they think ahead of scenarios like potential employers looking them up to get an idea of what they’re like. If he hasn’t done that then it should tell you a lot. Listen to your gut sis.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/22 08:42 AM
63

Nah sis, you offer tacos, but they’re paying! You know how desperate they are deep down for time with you so they probably will. Bonus: say you feel a real connection so you can fuck again and then ghost them!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/04/22 11:39 PM
26

Why are you reposting this here?! It is disgusting and breaks sub rules. You’re reposting for shock value, you’re either a troll or just karma farming. Read the damn rules.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/04/22 03:40 PM
457

I’ve yet to see older men take care of themselves the way older women do. Most men age like milk.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/22 11:32 PM
226

Here’s an idea: he should go fuck himself instead! 😊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/22 10:33 PM
7

Since you asked for advice: please read the handbook since most of what you’re asking can be answered by reading the sidebar and strategy posts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/22 01:59 AM
25

That was my question too. What’s the strategy OP??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/22 01:51 AM
127

Fucking yikes. At some point we need to start declaring some humans as write-offs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/22 11:26 PM
70

And those same men will act like they’re the prize when dating. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/22 01:46 AM
259

You’re craving intimacy and connection sis, that’s normal! Just shout out to one of ya girls for a catch up. I guarantee that a lot of those feelings of loneliness will subside when you connect with a close friend. I know I feel revitalised when I see my friends, they’re such wonderful company! If it’s horniness that’s the problem, practice some “self-care” and you’ll be g 😉
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/22 08:05 AM
-23

Why does it matter to you what anyone thinks about how you feel? What you think is the only thing that should matter to you. If something does not sit right with you, that is all that matters. You don’t need other people to talk you out of what you are feeling because what you are feeling is real to you. Your BF is likely invalidating your feelings and making you question yourself. Drop him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/22 05:44 AM
-50

If you don’t like the comedian, why are you sharing his content so he gets more views and publicity?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/22 05:35 AM
176

Pls don’t give extreme Pick Me’s like this another platform for publicity. Bad publicity is still publicity. NGL though, it’s hilarious how desperate for male validation she is 🤡 This lady needs to be ignored until she learns how irrelevant she is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/22 02:26 AM
53

If he wanted to, he would. He does not. Give yourself the love and attention you wanted from him. ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/22 02:17 AM
54

Agreed. I’m not a fan of texting. Texting should be limited to logistics only. Otherwise, excessive texting builds false intimacy. Everything else can wait for a call (limited time allocated as well) or face to face contact. The “good morning beautiful” texts are a load of bullshit and should be taken with a grain of salt. Actions should align with verbalisations. OP, be wary of false intimacy through texting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/22 02:15 AM
77

Reading this reminded me of that episode of The Office where Dwight and Jim are in charge of the Party Planning Committee for Kelly’s birthday. They decorate the conference room with barely blown up grey, black, and brown balloons and streamers, and a sign that states “it is your birthday.” 🤣🤣🤣 It is objectively hilarious but also a sad insight into how low effort some men can be.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/22 03:30 AM
461

I swear a scrote can straight up say that he doesn’t care about her and he is using her for sex, but the Pick Me will still be like “bUt wHaT dOeS hE rEaLLy mEaN???”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/22 06:32 AM
61

And then complain about the ongoing cost of servicing and maintaining a Rolls Royce compared to a Honda.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/22 02:16 AM
166

Better yet, describe yourself in obscure ways. Give ridiculous answers to ridiculous questions if you cannot exit the situation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/22 05:47 AM
110

This comment is so on point. Men want women to perform femininity, but will then go on to harass and insult those same women for performing femininity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/22 06:11 AM
26

Even shy people step up and overcome their nerves when they want something. I’ve seen the shyest of men move mountains for the woman they are courting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/22 08:45 PM
81

You should watch “Kevin Can F*** Himself”. Shows life through the lens of a manchild vs what life is really like for his wife who is out of his league. Great show that captures how manchildren really don’t give a shit how they’re perceived.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/22 09:02 AM
64

You ditch the scrote and befriend each other instead.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/22 05:33 AM
87

Not every single woman is exploited and trafficked. Some women make choices that throw other women under the bus. Those women need to be held accountable. Women are not all damsels. Women are not all immune from responsibility for their bad decision making “because patriarchy”. The Ghislane Maxwell’s of the world need to be held accountable. The toxic pick me’s who endanger the safety and welfare of other women need to be held accountable. It is possible to acknowledge that patriarchy and groomi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/22 05:29 AM
154

These men are literally correct (though not in the way they intended). DV statistics indicate that women do, in fact, live a little in comparison to single women who live a lot more. Femicide is rampant in dating and relationships! Fun!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/22 05:18 AM
33

I agree with this 100%. I believe in holding men accountable, but I also believe in holding women accountable. Holding ourselves accountable is not victim blaming. We are not damsels, we need to wake the fuck up and start believing men when they show us who they are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/22 12:33 AM
33

Women like this delude themselves because they are socialised to believe that suffering in relationships is normal. I genuinely believe that these women dissociate from their reality and cling onto the false hope and dreams in their little fantasy land because if they didn’t, it would mean they have to accept the cold hard truth that they are living a lie and nothing they do to “make him see her worth” matters. It’s the saddest existence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/22 12:30 AM
18

That makes sense. He’s so irrelevant that the only way he gets noticed is by leeching attention. Pathetic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 09:21 PM
138

I swear Pete Davison seems to be every female celebrity type’s rebound. He just pops up when a woman leaves a relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 11:22 AM
43

You are my hero.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 06:10 AM
156

I second this comment. I found Trevor Noah’s book to be a delightful read. He seems like a down to earth guy trying to do his best and grow through life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 05:57 AM
280

The friends don’t want to connect with you because the more they do, the more it humanises you, and the more they realise how horrible what you’re going through is. Or they’re just likeminded scumbags. It’s very cruel. I’m sorry you went through that sis.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 05:50 AM
2

Don’t waste your energy explaining yourself to people like that. They will drain you and their beliefs will not change.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/22 08:19 PM
6

If a man posted this there would be 100 awards, a million upvotes, and people throwing themselves at him begging to suck his dick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/22 08:04 PM
609

Translation: my masturbation appliance has started malfunctioning, how do I make it comply?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/22 08:09 AM
161

Thank you. It shits me when I see women choosing to suffer like this when they have the freedom to leave! There are women who are trapped in bad r’ships that can’t leave (i.e. Pakistan, SA, etc), but girl has a chance here! I can guarantee the man is definitely not out here overthinking it like her. He gets a mommy-bangmaid if she comes back. She deludes herself that it’s not that bad, and she just needs to stop being so high maintenance right?! Then it gets worse when they do get married and br…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/22 05:43 AM
462

No. Just no. Why are you out here writing essays begging to be treated with respect? Girl, be real with yourself, if he wanted to step up, he would. He is NOT going to change. You know he is not going to read this. And if he does? You just gave him a playbook on how to manipulate you for a while before the mask slips again, until you grow a backbone and permanently leave him. When will you leave permanently? When there are children involved? More victims to a shitty man? Men only learn from cons…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/22 05:34 AM
72

Men like this are parasites searching for NLOG PickMe’s desperate for male validation. Any woman who falls for this shit has work to do on herself. When men attempt this divide and conquer strategy with me, I call it out immediately. I refuse to throw other women under the bus, I will not sabotage my sisters.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/22 01:49 AM
122

Reading this makes me think you were “the other woman”. I think he was using you as his sidepiece, this dude probably had a whole-ass girlfriend. I’m so sorry sis.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/22 12:29 AM
78

NGL sis, I love my wand so much, but sometimes my lizard brain makes me crave good hot dick attached to a genetically superior male. But I am a rational human in control of my dumb dumb urges. 😅
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/22 03:10 AM
40

I feel seen 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/22 02:48 AM
157

I love this and relate deeply. My horny brain makes me super dumb (know thyself). As a fit person, I typically date hot, fit guys so it makes my lizard brain activate something bad. I make sure to have something scheduled after dates so I don’t make dumb decisions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/22 02:22 AM
26

You are not a martyr. Stop letting yourself suffer. Be better to yourself. Your mother did not go through back-breaking labour to birth a doormat. Spend the rest of your 20s investing in your studies, career, hobbies, health/fitness, friendships, family (if applicable). Doing so will make your standards and boundaries strong and non-negotiable. This is necessary for when you are ready to date. Invest in building your confidence and self-esteem. You won’t find that in the arms of a man. We here a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/22 09:49 PM
62

I’m so glad someone said it. It’s so draining coming to the sub and seeing “my boyfriend is amazing but…” proceeds to write essay that is a straight up trauma dump
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/22 09:37 PM
3

Ooh, I like this perspective! You make a very good point. Genuinely didn’t think of it like this but it’s so true.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/22 07:36 AM
49

This may be an unpopular opinion, but as one of FDS’ patrons I feel like it’s fair to share my feedback. I love the podcast as well as the bonus content, but just not a fan of these reality TV breakdowns. I still love listening to the ladies bc of random insights and clever quips, but overall, TV show analysis episodes are a bit of a disappointment, especially when most weeks we get incredible episodes that just keep exceeding expectations. I understand you need to cater to all your listeners, a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/22 10:39 AM
68

This is a lot of writing to justify a very clear red flag. He literally told on himself. How much more evidence do you need? I’m so crazy over him I get really nervous about losing him. This is alarming. Please prioritise building your confidence in yourself. Get nervous instead about the idea of losing yourself in this relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/22 06:47 AM
116

You move on with your life and don’t give them your energy. Bad publicity is still publicity. Hate watching means nothing to them when they’re still generating revenue from views. Stop giving them your attention and redirect your attention to female driven initiatives. Support your sisters instead.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/22 03:31 AM
18

Powerful episode. This is definitely a discussion that needs to be had moving forward in the mental health space. Yes, it may be contentious, but there is no doubt that society is currently over-pathologising every little feeling and behaviour. I especially appreciated her take on the trauma response. Victims should not be labelled as “disordered” for having a completely reasonable reaction to a horrific event. The cause of the trauma is the disordered individual, not the victim!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/22 03:32 AM
222

Above all, it’s easier to date as you get older because typically your boundaries are strong and your standards are non-negotiable. You don’t put up with bad behaviour because you know that being an “enduring woman” is a scam. This is why predatory men will prey on younger, naive women with weaker boundaries. They’re easier to push around and manipulate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/22 03:23 AM
66

Please don’t repost these horrific screenshots on FDS. It is explicitly stated in the sub rules. No low effort posts. Read the sub rules. We know LV/NV behaviour exists. There are numerous useful strategy posts to navigate abusive and toxic behaviour. Screenshots of posts that exist for shock value are not helpful or useful. This is just harmful content.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/22 10:09 AM
21

This comment is everything. Imagine how much more men would achieve if they didn’t allow for stupid time wasters like porn in their life. The few men I know who have an anti-porn stance are some of the highest achievers with such fulfilling lives. Male lurkers, please take note of this. There is more to life than pathetically thirsting over a screen in the dark. Be better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/22 10:03 AM
82

It’s a cope and a projection. They believe you are capable of being destructive and abusive because that’s how they behave. They think everyone thinks like them. Read ‘Why Does He Do That?’ by Lundy Bancroft if you haven’t. It will help you understand the mentality of abusers. And remember, cheating is a form of psychological abuse (and sometimes physical if you get diseases from his infidelity, or you’re coerced into something, e.g. threesomes, polygamy). Betrayal trauma is real.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/22 06:38 AM
142

Jesus fucking Christ. This breaks my heart. Women need to stop gaslighting themselves! The bloody mental gymnastics justifying male entitlement and violence, I cannot even. She can’t even give herself the space to call her rape experience for what it is. That is so tragic. Not sure if it’s a trauma response (could be, i.e. refusing to call it for what it is/ denying it happened) but I’m getting a really depressing vibe that she’s got extremely low self-esteem and regularly accepts shitty male be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/22 11:43 AM
81

That’s so creepy. There’s another word for that sort of behaviour: stalking.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/22 06:29 AM
50

Same here. It’s 100% a projection. The butthurt women are usually in a shitty situationship and hearing you trash talk abusive men makes them feel insecure because they feel like it’s a personal attack since you just described their life back to them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/22 07:09 AM
34

It really is insidious behaviour. Typical abuser shit, he wants to have the perfect wife and everything on the side as well. Impossible to please because they’re innately miserable and unappreciative.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/22 06:15 AM
11

I do this when I reverse! I feel like I reverse park better as long as my hand is on the back of the passenger seat. Doesn’t feel right if I don’t do it 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/22 08:41 AM
7

Hahah I’m going stand in solidarity for the post work gym people! We, too, care about our gains but some of us have other commitments in the morning that means we can’t go for a morning pump! Don’t put us all in the same category pls 😅
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/22 06:15 AM
58

I went through my saved posts to share these. These posts and their comments are some great insights into the dumpster fire that is OLD. There’s plenty more if you search the sub, but some have been deleted and this is what I had saved. Hope they help. 1 2 3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/22 06:15 AM
22

PHENOMENAL POST! Perfectly captures the overall purpose of FDS. This needs to be permanently pinned on the sub and also needs to preface the handbook.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/22 06:35 AM
60

There is nothing more attractive than an attentive and observant man. I make an effort to hold myself to this same standard. When I compliment my friends, I don’t use generic filler crap. I reflect my observations back to them so they feel valued and appreciated, and also that their efforts are recognised. It doesn’t have to be about appearance either. For example: one of my colleagues is a friend as well, she asks me to check a report for typos. Her writing is excellent and she articulates info…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/22 05:49 AM
36

I second this. Also in a field with a number of older women admin and they’re massive pick me’s who are judgey and make nasty comments about other women. Thankfully, most senior ranking women in my field are quite strong and confident, so it balances things out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/22 10:01 PM
32

Lived experience coupled with observing male and female socialisation over the years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/22 09:53 PM
51

I could not focus on the context at all, I was way too distracted with the capitalisations!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/22 06:52 AM
37

Can confirm. My mother thought my abusive psycho father (who stressed to her he didn’t want kids from day dot) would cHaNgE if they had kids. She kept breeding with the scrote and it didn’t change shit, only created more victims of DV. Thankfully, she’s seen the light and kicked her pick me habits years ago. Doesn’t change the fact that we’re all riddled with trauma. 🙃 This is a hot take and y’all are welcome to disagree: but Olivia Munn was known to be desperately stalking and thirsting for Joh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/22 03:42 AM
20

Better to be exhausted from vetting than winding up as another DV statistic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 11:10 PM
33

Block and delete at the first sign of disrespect. Giving “benefit of the doubt” is the death of too many women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 12:38 AM
94

Problem is, they’re going to be invalidated and dismissed. This is why FDS is so important. It helps women to develop confidence and self-respect to leave a man that treats them like shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 12:54 PM
3

You are an absolute gem. Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 12:31 PM
41

Empathy and accountability are not mutually exclusive.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 12:29 PM
15

This 100%. You are absolutely on point.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 12:29 PM
101

I swear women like this will walk into a room and the man will be balls deep in some other woman (or in this case someone will be balls deep in him), and she’ll still be like “rEdDiT wHaT dO I dO???”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 12:28 PM
104

I don’t feel bad for her, I don’t care how ruthless that makes me sound. She clowned herself. Hopefully she sees the light and leaves the circus someday.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 12:24 PM
9

I know this can probably be googled but I feel like asking someone with insider knowledge will yield a more quality answer. I want to learn more about horses and get into riding. Could you please direct me to any helpful online sources so I can do some research?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 02:59 AM
91

If he wanted to, he would.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/22 05:42 AM
131

It’s all a cope, and it’s 100% trauma bonding.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/22 02:47 AM
530

When I see the woman saying “we have plans of getting married”, I’m like “nah sis, YOU think you have plans, you are projecting, he ain’t thinking that at all”. It so sad to me that women keep breeding with scrotes. It needs to stop. Please, my sisters, please guard your wombs. If not for yourself, then at least for the welfare and future needs of that child. Female animals are selective of mates in the animal kingdom, yet somehow with humans we dropped the ball.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/22 12:49 AM
1214

Any time I see something prefaced with “my boyfriend is amazing and I love him…” I know I’m in for a ride.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/22 12:42 AM
99

Something doesn’t sit right with me reading this. I get that it’s meant to be sweet, but it’s almost like he’s low key blaming the partner for “ruining” porn. It could have been phrased better, saying that he’s woken up and sees the reality of how toxic porn is, and how grateful he is for understanding now, and that he will never use it again. That’s not the case though. No, this guy has stopped using porn for the wrong reasons. He doesn’t recognise how degrading and dehumanising it is. He actua…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/22 03:11 AM
181

This is so wholesome! My icy heart has melted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/22 12:53 AM
65

Being a kind, decent person and having strong boundaries are not mutually exclusive. Do not confuse boundaries with being a bitch. That is behaviour you were socialised to learn as a woman. You’re now unlearning that, which is fantastic. Keep going. You are a multidimensional human being, you can be more than one thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/22 11:22 PM
84

Fantastic post. I often think that critics of FDS don’t realise that we hold ourselves to the same standards that we expect. We expect ourselves to level up and be HVW, thereby only accepting the company of HVM. This is a great reminder for the women (especially new to FDS) that overthink and doubt their gut feeling when dating a new guy. Listen to your gut ladies! Ask yourself when you’re questioning something he did, would you do that to him? You know what to do from there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/22 11:11 PM
14

Block and delete the scrote. Put yourself first, and don’t overthink it. Invest in yourself and pour all that love into yourself! This is why we recommend a scrotation and keeping yourself occupied while dating so you don’t get emotionally invested too early. It’s self-sabotage to be able to let him contact you, i.e. not blocking him. You know he is going to upset you, but you’re leaving the communication channel open. Believe men when they show you who they are, don’t expect him to magically ch…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/22 10:56 PM
20

Don’t recommend explaining yourself to a scrote. You don’t owe him shit. Block and delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/22 10:52 PM
75

Your presence is a gift in his life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/22 01:25 PM
26

You’ll notice it’s usually throwaway accounts or people new to FDS who are still giving time and energy to scrotes. You’ll notice the women who advocate for blocking and deleting have been following FDS principles for a while and don’t bother trying to change men. You’re doing the right thing by recognising that it’s not worth responding to men like this. Hopefully other women learn eventually.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/22 02:33 AM
3

You answered your own question within your post. You rely on external validation rather than developing your internal validation skills. Work on that. Read the handbook and recommended books to help you reflect and build your confidence in yourself. Introspection goes a long way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/22 02:24 AM
26

Exactly. I don’t get why the photo would be referred to as a “thirst trap” and then deny that it’s “sexy”. The interpretation of the image is ultimately up to the person looking at it. I actually see this as LVW behaviour because it’s matching LVM energy. A HVW wouldn’t waste time trying to bait LVM, she would focus her energy on being productive, and if dating, using smart strategies to vet. It’s totally cool to put cute photos (read: that actually look like you) of yourself up if you’re feelin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/22 02:37 AM
72

NGL I find it to be really PickMe behaviour to post photos that don’t even look like oneself, e.g. overly facetuned/poor man’s photoshopped, too many filters, etc. What is your friend aiming to achieve here? It’s not like it’s a big secret that pornsick scrotes will thirst over photos like that. There is no grand reveal or aha moment. Your friend is clowning herself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/22 01:43 AM
4

When one has lost sight of connecting with their womanhood, one must simply Elon Musk.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 07:27 AM
6

We got too many professional victims here who conflate accountability with “victim blaming”. It does my head in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 07:24 AM
78

LVM hate HVM because HVM make it harder for them to get away with shitty behaviour. HVM expect to be held to a higher standard because they think just doing the bare minimum alone is pathetic. LVM hate this. It means that women develop expectations of them and they can’t fool women to think that all men are like them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 07:22 AM
6

That’s the flair for the mods. It’s bizarre that people wouldn’t appreciate the advice of the ladies who keep the sub going! It’s like entering someone’s house and then insulting them for it not being up to your standards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 07:15 AM
-11

Pick Me’s got strength in numbers 😂 Too many still can’t handle OG FDS bluntness.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 06:58 AM
-13

If you have to ask this question, you haven’t read the handbook. Read the handbook.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 04:53 AM
28

Why is this downvoted? It is a very real possibility. A lot of voyeurs also gratify themselves through exhibitionism. It’s sexually dysfunctional behaviour, yet neolibs will claim it’s a “totally healthy kink” and keep trying to normalise unhealthy and dysfunctional sexual behaviour. Let me make this clear. It is not healthy or normal. It is dysfunctional behaviour. OP said her dad confessed to being a porn addict in a comment. Makes sense. Deep sexual dysfunction is not uncommon with porn addic…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/22 06:15 AM
11

LVM = low value male. Has some value, but overall doesn’t add value or substance to your life. Next him. ZVM = zero value male. Nothing going for this guy. Pure deadweight. NVM = negative value male. This is abuser territory. He is called negative valhe as he actively drains value from your life and leaves you worse off than prior to meeting him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/22 06:04 AM
217

He told on himself. It sucks that he isn’t who you thought he was, but that’s why we say to always vet. Even when he seems wonderful, keep vetting. Block and delete. Invest in yourself and everything that brings you joy. A (loving, healthy, and equitable) relationship is a bonus on an already fulfilling life. And read the handbook if you haven’t.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/22 12:03 PM
56

You respond to “What are you looking for?” with “I’ll know when I see it.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/22 06:41 AM
109

Respectfully, I disagree. My NV ex was the most passionate kisser. It was one of his manipulative traits and one of the many ways he deceived me so well to believe that he was madly in love with me. He was still a pornsick cheating abusive scrote. A lot of abusers and narcissists can up their charm and make you swoon to get what they want. Yes, some can be heartless and not kiss you, but some can use it to their advantage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/22 02:49 PM
20

Makes sense. No wonder my generation (millennials/gen y) and younger are so overly sensitive, easily offended, and need constant validation from strangers. Completely underdeveloped emotional regulation skills.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 03:38 PM
29

I absolutely love this comment. This is why I hate seeing stupid screenshots and reposts from other subs. A HVW doesn’t lurk on her haters spaces and waste energy on what they think of her. We know scrotes exist, we don’t need daily reminders spamming the sub. And for those about to ree that that’s how some women need to learn to identify abusive behaviour, just no. There are NUMEROUS written posts on FDS about identifying and managing abusive and narcissistic behaviour. These informative posts …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 02:56 AM
77

Nah, “anger issues” is a cop out, an excuse for male violence. It is normal to experience anger and express that emotion through a healthy means. Many men choose to weaponise their anger and express it through violence. Their anger isn’t the issue. The root cause beneath it is the actual issue, and 9 times out of 10, that issue is misogyny. This is the problem with most therapy and men’s behaviour change programs. They focus on the superficial anger, instead of probing into the root cause. Read …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 01:09 AM
160

Because socialised male entitlement to women’s spaces.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 12:58 AM
13

Bob Vance was actually so sweet and attentive to Phyllis! I loved them!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/22 10:56 AM
51

Also, can’t believe I forgot this part, he proposed at a gas station! Even Michael (an infuriating idiot) was like “Jim, wtf???” when he found out how Jim proposed. Jim was generally a sweet funny guy, but he was lazy overall. It was evident in his work ethic and of course shows in his relationship eventually. We all swooned for Jim bc we were inadvertently comparing him to Roy. It’s the classic: next bf looking like a hero bc the previous one was an abuser or LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/22 12:50 AM
92

Not the above commenter, but he was pretty low effort. Yes, he was sweet and sentimental, but he really made some poor choices by making MAJOR life decisions without consulting/being on the same page as Pam, e.g. buying his parents house, accepting the job in Philly. All this may seem great superficially, but in the long run throughout a long term committed marriage, it would be really draining to have your partner make huge decisions without respecting your thoughts, or even straight up undermi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 11:55 PM
18

NGL it’s a headfuck for me when a fellow WOC is a libfem. The cognitive dissonance is real.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 02:09 AM
26

I feel like you should monetise this idea before it gets stolen. Do a collab with an anti-porn organisation that promotes healthy lifestyles over being a sad coomer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/22 07:58 AM
54

There are so many posts in the sub about this. I recommend using the search feature with some obvious keywords. Check the handbook out for the posts about abusers and their traits, especially narcissists. Additionally read “Why Does He Do That” by Lundy Bancroft. It will help you understand abusers and their dysfunctional behaviour, particularly the insidious nature of abuse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/22 05:44 AM
60

I think this one was the absolute best 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/22 03:36 AM
28

Block and delete. Stop overthinking it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/22 11:18 PM
24

This comment is perfection. If you have to spend time overanalysing behaviour and then decide to put it forward to strangers on the internet for review, then that should be an immediate sign that the relationship is doomed. What’s bizarre is that there is no relationship here at all! No investment should make it easier to block and delete! Cut this guy off, OP!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/22 11:14 PM
81

It makes me so happy seeing comments like this. I love it when women realise they deserve a healthy happy life with strong boundaries and standards. I’m really glad you found the sub. 🥲
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/22 01:27 PM
72

This is a fantastic point. It’s depressing that FDS is seen as something so radical, when really it’s just advocating for self-respect and dignity. That should be the norm. It shits me so much that women are conditioned to normalise suffering.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/22 01:49 AM
49

You nailed it. I’m also in the industry and any time a colleague starts getting oddly uncomfortable about someone else’s standards/boundaries, you usually know they aren’t compartmentalising (healthily, i.e. leave your personal issues at the door) and need a refresher on not taking things personally/ unconscious biases. The colleagues I’ve seen in situations like this are usually in unhealthy relationships, suck at setting boundaries themselves, or another similar issue. Interestingly enough, th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/22 01:44 AM
36

Be vulnerable with those that care about you or when you’ve determined it’s a safe space to do so, e.g. in a workplace setting with a compassionate supervisor and you’re discussing something challenging in the role. Do not allow yourself to be vulnerable all the time as that is just reckless behaviour inviting predators.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 09:50 AM
54

I agree with you, but that statement is still a way of saying what she would want to hear. I should clarify, I meant manipulating her in the sense that he just says what she wants to hear to shut her up and make her live a lie.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 06:25 AM
678

I think he admitted his truth and you didn’t like what you heard. You wanted to hear something about commitment. You didn’t get that and now you’re hurt. Even though he may have told on himself, at least he was honest and didn’t manipulate you. Now that you know what kind of person he is, it is clear that your values don’t align, and he isn’t actually committed to you. It’s time to part ways.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 12:38 AM
11

Yes, but unfortunately a lot of men will only listen to and learn from a man (sometimes subconsciously as it’s a socialised behaviour for them. Misogynistic af, but it’s the truth. They need to unlearn that shit). If other men learn from men who are on a level up journey, it may encourage them to make positive changes in their own life too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 12:26 AM
1193

Yes, they may literally be “having sex”. But in reality, most of them just want to masturbate into a woman. They don’t actually want to have sex, because sex is about connection, intimacy, passion, and mutual pleasure. They just want to use a woman’s body as tool to gratify themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 12:20 AM
141

Motherhood is a scam. I see it as a MLM scheme. Shills for the patriarchy and other conmen will try to rope you into it, trying to claim your value and worth depend on it, or that you’re desperately unhappy if you’re not a mother. The women worth their salt will tell you how hard and draining it is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 12:09 AM
24

Posts about those two have been made repeatedly on the sub. This is just repeat posting/karma farming, which goes against sub rules.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/22 01:08 PM
99

Why does it matter? Stop giving your energy to trivial BS. Cultivate a HV lifestyle and ignore dumb “celebrity” news.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/22 11:32 AM
44

This entire thread is absolutely beautiful. I love that you’ve encouraged a post that focuses on our growth journeys. I personally have seen so many changes in myself, but the most important one to me is that I will never EVER doubt my gut feeling again. I rediscovered the importance of listening to my body’s internal alarm system.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/22 08:16 AM
65

You don’t have to justify yourself to me. The questions I raised were something you should reflect on by yourself. Think about what it means for someone you love to be friends with people with problematic views and values, is that someone you wish to spend your life with? Take the time to understand how his behaviour impacts you, whether it is inadvertent or not. Consider to yourself, why are you justifying and defending his choices to strangers on the internet. Clearly something is not sitting …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/22 04:54 AM
119

You are the sum of who you surround yourself with. Your bf may be living vicariously through the people he associates with. My ex used to claim he was nothing like his NVM friends. Nope. His mask eventually dropped too. If your bf is truly growing and maturing, he will grow out of those people and cut contact with them. If not, that’s his decision. He has made his choice, but your boundaries are yours to enforce. If you’re not okay with this, what can you do? What choice will you make since you …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/22 03:38 AM
6

Most men don’t look good at any angle This is just chef’s kiss 🤌
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/22 12:51 AM
170

This is such a beautiful comment. What a wonderfully compassionate and empowering thing to say. I hope lovely things come your way. ☺️✨
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/22 12:04 PM
32

Tell me you can’t make a woman orgasm without telling me you can’t make a woman orgasm.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/22 07:24 AM
145

I wouldn’t advise commenting from the same profile you use for FDS. They will look up your post history and brigade FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/22 01:00 AM
600

Word salad that basically translates to: how do I keep this girl that won’t fuck me as an orbiter?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/22 12:53 AM
133

A resounding hell fucking no.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 12:55 PM
249

That type of man is impossible to please because even they don’t know what they want. They go for the pick me and get bored after a while because she’s too easy and boring. Then they go for a strong woman with boundaries and get frustrated that she won’t easily give in to his every whim. It’s such a stupid cycle, and they’ll still blame women for their problems instead of identifying the common denominator.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 02:28 AM
13

It is so sweet that a guy is taking the opportunity to learn to be the best version of himself from this sub! I didn’t know they existed! Usually it’s the opposite extreme, guys learning about FDS principles (i.e. self-respect and dignity, boundary setting skills) and manipulating the women instead. It’s actually really clever, instead of whining about women having standards and boundaries, they’ve found a lifehack and are using the sub to their advantage, learning to level themselves up. That’s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 12:10 AM
3

Oh sis, my ex was like this too. To the world he seemed like the most generous, thoughtful, respectful boyfriend. Behind closed doors (in addition to all kinds of other abuse) he attempted to murder me for something I didn’t say that he imagined 🙃 I mean this with nothing but kindness, but as a family member, you will never get to view him through the lens of his actual partner. You cannot determine how good a partner he is because you’re not seeing the side of him reserved for a gf/wife.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 12:03 AM
35

He will probably go for their first kid. Let’s be real.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/22 10:49 PM
23

Beat me to this comment! Exactly what I was thinking! He decided to embrace the full stereotype.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/22 10:49 PM
222

Never underestimate the power of female friendships. Once you open your heart to quality female friends, you will never tolerate mistreatment (especially from men) because they’ve shown you what it’s like to be valued.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/22 10:10 PM
330

Battle of the PickMe’s over here. Fucking yikes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/22 11:41 AM
80

100%! When I dropped the pornsick scrote ex so many of my health problems began to clear up and become a lot more manageable. People forget how stress can manifest subtly in physical ways, it can be so dangerous to our health. My experience was a reminder to never let someone get the better of me again. I wish I were exaggerating but it nearly killed me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/22 10:39 AM
51

100%! Any woman I know with some sort of condition or disorder that impacts her life in any way, makes every effort to learn to manage herself responsibly (myself included!). I have little sympathy for men whining about their shit because I always think, his female counterpart has learned to deal with this, he needs to grow the fuck up and deal too. It’s understandable if it’s a child, but an adult needs to get their shit together.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/22 10:30 AM
233

The guy is definitely a porn addict. Any time I see a post about a woman claiming her husband has low sex drive or some other BS, he’s always secretly cheating, has a porn addiction, or something else that points to him just not being attracted or interested in her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/22 10:18 AM
200

I think this needs to be printed and handed to every woman ever so she can unlearn her socialised behavioural need to inadvertently mother a man. Nothing dries me out faster than a manchild that refuses to learn basic living skills. It’s actually concerning when an adult refuses to look after themselves. And to those about to ree that it could be a mental health issue, just no. Lots of people with mental health conditions don’t weaponise their issues and learn to manage themselves responsibly be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/22 10:06 AM
494

99.99% of guys on OLD are just looking for an easy fuck. Why waste your time looking for the 0.01% that are not. Not worth the hassle.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/22 12:04 AM
99

Excellent point! Lundy Bancroft made a similar point in the recent podcast episode. He has growing concerns that people have been quick to pathologise misogynists/abusers as narcissists/sociopaths/psychopaths. That label gives them an excuse to hide behind, a mental health condition to weaponise. Yes, some abusers may have diagnosed disorders, disordered personality traits, and so on, but a lot of the time these men are just straight up misogynistic abusers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/22 01:37 AM
271

This is such a valuable point. I think this is a really helpful reframe of a mindset that is inadvertently reinforcing that women are a commodity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/22 01:30 AM
106

I relate to this deeply. Girls get shut down and told to shut up, yet the school makes an effort to contact boys’ parents to say they believe something is off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 07:49 PM
28

He reminds me of the type of creep that hits on teenage girls.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 08:33 AM
26

This is my approach as well. I have met some incredible women thanks to this approach.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 05:34 AM
57

There is no one-size-fits-all approach to style (pun intended). I would suggest just going for clothes that flatter your figure, tailored where possible. Doesn’t matter where you bought it or how much it cost, nothing looks better than clothing that flatters your shape.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 02:20 AM
139

He seems really immature.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 02:13 AM
47

OMG YES! 2021 was the year of the “nest” guy, 2022 is “mushy ass hair soap” guy! FDS is gonna have a damn scrote zodiac at this point!!! 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/22 09:56 AM
237

This post is not safe for life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/22 03:08 AM
25

If she’s footing the bill for his studies, then he absolutely owes her an explanation of his progress. His failure will be at her expense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/22 11:37 AM
28

Her outfit gave me life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/22 07:02 AM
17

I’m sorry you have had to go through this, that sounds like a good plan though. Keep your boundaries strong as she may abuse your friendship and use you when things get tough with him, then abandon you/ disregard your support when she goes back to him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/22 01:24 AM
32

Some people refuse to learn from the wisdom and insight of others. You cannot control or change her, you’ve done your best as her friend, the rest is on her. I fear that she will have to learn the hard way because this relationship seems to mean more to her than her friendship with you, or any other matter in her life that should have priority.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/22 01:08 AM
111

approachable/ cold Be mindful of men who are the opposite extreme of this. Being super hot is a concerning behaviour. Watch out for behaviour that is overly familiar/ overly flirty. That is straight up overt narc territory right there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/22 12:35 AM
125

Visa/love dynamic is almost always a load of shit. Too many stories of non-citizens exploiting and manipulating citizens for sponsorship/permanent residency status, whatever it’s called in your country. I’ve seen this firsthand in my family. Once they gain perm residence/citizenship, their true colours show. Your friend is a chump who is being manipulated. Sounds like she’s too deep in the fog to see the reality of her situation unfortunately. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to this. Ever…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/22 12:30 AM
76

He is not a predator, he is a parasite.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 09:40 PM
45

I don’t buy it. A man wrote this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/22 04:43 PM
14

This was magical. ✨
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/22 01:12 PM
62

I and some other women with diagnosed PCOS got banned from the PCOS sub because we stated that biologically male humans cannot have PCOS and should therefore take their two cents elsewhere.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/22 10:16 AM
84

I disagree. I have no social media (other than Reddit for FDS) and I feel like the people like myself who avoid excess screen time generally have interesting fulfilling lives. The guys I’ve met who refrain from using social media are generally well balanced and engage more meaningfully in real life interactions. Of course, this has been my experience, your experience is just as valid.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/22 10:02 AM
43

She’s not saying you were bragging. It’s a subconscious behaviour women have been conditioned with, to prove they are worthy for a man to choose her. Basically, you inadvertently explain and justify yourself to him as to why he should pick you. We all need to unlearn that Pick Me behaviour at some stage, as it is the man that needs to court and prove himself a worthy partner. This guy was clearly manipulating you to feel sorry for him for an easy fuck. You thought he was struggling and wanted to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/22 12:47 AM
267

Every time one is started, it either gets brigaded or shut down. Or both. Reddit is not the place for feminist discourse unfortunately, best rely on other platforms for that. I really like Spinster and recommend that!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/22 10:47 PM
90

Girl, mental health is not an excuse for poor behaviour. I saw about 10 red flags immediately into your post. He clearly gave you a sob story and you fell for it. You literally state you saw the red flags but chose to give him a chance(?!) 🤡 Then when it didn’t work out, you rant on FDS. Come on! FDS also advocates for accountability. Own up to your choices here. Read and reread the handbook. Work on your confidence and boundary setting skills. You will see through guys like this and won’t fall …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/22 10:41 PM
20

If you want to reach out to a user then just DM them. Posting a comment linking to FDS encourages haters to brigade and spam the sub. The mods work hard enough to clean the sub up as it is, you’re just giving them more unnecessary work.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/22 08:41 AM
105

I’m not sure I agree with your title. An Israeli woman isn’t “making” her kid’s dad do anything. A man is being held accountable for his responsibility owed to his children and the mother of his children who is primarily raising them. As he should be.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/21 03:08 AM
121

This poor woman was probably having a nervous breakdown bc of her useless husband. Wouldn’t surprise me if she presented him divorce papers immediately afterwards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/21 02:26 AM
79

You really shouldn’t use the same account for FDS that you use for other subs. It encourages brigading from other subs, lord knows the mods have enough to deal with. Great roast though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/21 03:41 AM
10

I was so disappointed with Insecure. In the beginning it had all the makings of being a great show that was about women levelling up. But by the end it was true to it’s name. Desperately (as well as subtly) insecure women who only found validation in being partnered. I was not a fan of the pick me libfem hookup culture bs in the show either. Issa was exhausting, constantly desperate to fill the void in her life with men instead of looking inwards and developing self-awareness. Molly was so SO cl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/21 03:17 AM
25

I don’t give them my energy, I don’t owe a stranger an explanation. I don’t need to justify my standards and boundaries. I block and delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/21 12:42 AM
38

Stay strong and keep working on healing. All we can do is learn from our experiences to avoid falling for the same type of man again. These men may have traumatised us but do not give them the power of keeping you down even after they’re gone. The best revenge is success. Be your best self for you. Believe in karma. He will face the consequences of his actions one day.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/21 12:56 PM
245

He manipulated me to believe that he would change because our love🤡was🤡so🤡strong🤡and I was eVeRyThInG to him.🤡🤡🤡 He did not change. He kept cheating. It changed me in that I became so bitter, I resented him, the betrayal trauma was very real. I hated that every positive memory together was ruined bc he was cheating the entire time. The man I knew did not even exist. I created him in my head. The deceitful narc before me shattered my worldview, but that was the real him and I had to accept that a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/21 08:33 AM
69

That pick me just straight up ditched her friend for the pedo. Poor form, sis! Don’t abandon your friends for pedophiles, ladies!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/21 07:45 AM
202

That is a crime. Wilfully distributing an image without consent. You report it to the police, is what you do. Fun fact: it’s also considered a sex offence. To the male lurkers, take note before you think with your scrote.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/21 08:13 AM
10

You get it. You’ve absolutely nailed the point this post makes. Hopefully other newbies will soon come to this realisation too. I think a lot of newbies just superficially read the handbook without actually seeking to understand the reasoning behind the advice. Regardless, you’re on point.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 10:38 PM
19

Sis, your presence is a gift in his life! Stay strong. Be confident in yourself. Don’t stress over shit like this, let him do his courting and you just vet, vet, vet!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 10:28 PM
98

Nah, sis. You need to stop with that noise.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 11:06 AM
211

Imagine being so weak and fragile. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you… the “rational” sex!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 05:54 AM
6

TL;DR(W?): if he wanted to, he would.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/21 10:34 AM
91

You don’t owe him shit. “Holiday season” is just another time of the year. Get it over and done with now so that you don’t waste any more of your time on someone you don’t feel a connection with. Life is too short, spend it with the people who matter to you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/21 01:24 PM
4

These are all questions that can be answered by reading the handbook.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/21 10:18 PM
3

This seems to be a lot of time and effort spent on giving a platform to the scrotes who spam you. FDS is about blocking and deleting, not letting Z/N/LVM live in your head rent free. Making a post about it seems like you’re responding to the scrotes indirectly. Just seems like you’re still justifying yourself to these LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/21 09:32 PM
46

Where is the lie???
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/21 10:14 PM
19

He is a LVM. It means he may have some value to someone but he is still LOW value. Your father did the bare minimum by participating in parenting his own children. Some value there but definitely not high. He is low value. NB: there’s no such thing as “medium” value. Low value already implies there is some value. If he is abusive and draining you, that’s what makes a guy negative value.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/21 09:56 PM
110

I love this. It shows so much introspection and growth. It is so powerful to take ownership of your choices.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/21 12:20 PM
65

And it’s so rarely the good behaviours they adopt! My ex had a HVM for a father, somehow it went pear shaped with him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/21 01:29 AM
22

I love this comment so much 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/21 12:51 AM
-3

Why are you posting this here? How is this about maximising female benefit in the context of dating? I recall the mods making a post about traumatic screen shot posts like this not being permitted on the sub.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/12/21 07:56 AM
369

Sis, that ain’t low key.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/12/21 02:46 AM
62

Don’t waste your time watching more of it. It’s such a dumb show. Watch Parks and Rec, Ted Lasso, or something else that’s wholesome and actually funny.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/21 12:19 PM
20

Came here to say you have a phenomenal username.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/21 12:37 AM
209

This is painfully casual. Nothing is more attractive to me than a man who takes initiative and plans a lovely date. “Hanging out” and “shooting for X” is what teenagers do. Adults make plans because we are busy, have tighter schedules, and need confirmation of concrete action.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/21 08:29 AM
164

Sounds like she’s being isolated from her friends. I don’t know, something isn’t sitting right with me reading this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/21 08:24 AM
68

Like all laws related to women that are made to appease the public (read: shut women up), it will just become words on paper that police rarely (if ever) enforce.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/21 11:23 AM
46

Wooooow this is soooo pathetic! This is next level scrotatious audacity. Scrotacity! I cannot ever imagine being attracted to a manchild like this. Does she even get aroused by such a lazy worm that has so deeply emasculated himself!? Who could?! Men like this know they are pathetic deep down and eventually need to feel power and control again. He will do so by cheating and using her money. She needs to do some digging to find the evidence, (he’s home all the time and a NVM, cheating/pornsicknes…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/21 09:08 AM
54

I hate the term “living in a female/male body”. It is not a vessel that you occupy. You are your body. You are one and the same. In relation to your question: if he can read my body language/observes social cues, and he is respectful and well-mannered, it is a good start. E.g. I am at the gym, wearing headphones - social cue: leave me alone, I am focusing. I am at a market/ food festival, open body language, likely mingling with people around me, he strikes up a friendly conversation at the stal…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/21 11:22 PM
89

THANK YOU. SNL has such better talent than that failed abortion.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/21 11:12 PM
568

Kick him to the kerb and stop calling him a HVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/21 11:07 PM
8

Bizarre this is downvoted, it’s straight facts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/21 06:01 AM
9

My kinda gal ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/21 02:45 AM
145

This is a powerful observation and deserves its own standalone post. The problem is, when you attempt to encourage discourse around this, it’s immediately pigeonholed as “victim blaming”, when really it’s only encouraging women take ownership of what is within their control instead of expecting men to magically change overnight.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/21 10:41 PM
405

Hot take: some young male novelists might have been women using pseudonyms. Nowadays, these women are just comfortable publishing under their own name.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/21 12:24 AM
57

Definitely a red flag. These “homebodies” are not always homebodies by choice. I’d wager he is avoiding telling you the real reason why he’s home all the time. The guy sounds like he is under house arrest and is trying to order home delivery pussy via OLD.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/21 05:49 AM
77

Keanu is a precious angel we must protect.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 10:27 AM
11

I do. I think he’s hustling both the right and left to make a quick buck. Regardless of whether people agree with him or not, he’s got the attention he’s looking for.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 10:16 AM
63

There is only one. The one. Keanu Reeves. 😍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 01:19 AM
126

This is what I thought too. Something about this doesn’t sit right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 06:11 AM
246

Dude really needs to go to therapy and sort his shit out Pun intended? 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 06:08 AM
255

This is so accurate. The entitlement of ugly and unhealthy men is something else. Notice how he describes his own fatness as an endearing quality? He assumes that women perceive him the way he perceives himself. He needs to get over himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/21 02:58 AM
108

Stop overthinking it. She’s clearly negging you. Apply FDS principles to ALL relationships in your life, not just dating. You’ll see an overall improvement in the quality of the people you keep around you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/21 01:13 PM
148

Your “friend” is an asshole. You can make a choice to keep that negativity in your life, or find the strength to cut her out and only surround yourself with healthy self-assured friends who don’t drag you down to feel better about themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/21 01:01 PM
3

Why are you reposting this trash on FDS?! Bad publicity is still publicity. We know NVM like this exist, they don’t need another platform or to be a part of our space too. Giving them energy and attention is what NVM want! The mods literally made a post about low effort posts like this not being helpful to the sub.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/21 03:35 AM
96

Better to be a bitch than a pushover.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/21 12:09 AM
53

Came here to say this, but girl you nailed it. OP, he ain’t interested in you. If he wanted to, he would. Your values don’t align. You want a future, he clearly doesn’t. You need to take ownership of yourself and move on with your life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/21 06:56 AM
87

I love Dr Youn. He is a legend!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/21 06:45 AM
394

Women are socialised to endure shitty male behaviour. Men are socialised to put themselves first. Men would leave or cheat immediately if they stopped getting sex. Women put up with it because they’ve been conditioned that sex doesn’t mean as much to women. Or that you’re a judgey mean bitch if you don’t accept his shit dick. Or both. There are no repercussions for men when they put themselves first, yet women get criticised and judged to no end.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/21 01:07 AM
13

This 100%. I find it very attractive when a man is bold and confident to ask you himself, makes an effort to get to know you himself, not relying on secondhand information. Asking about OP through their friend is only getting the friend’s interpretation of who OP is. It’s really low effort. OP, your gut is telling you to wait for a reason, the red flags are right there. Don’t ignore them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/21 12:26 AM
22

Weird that he likened you to a relative and then wants to go out with you. Idk just doesn’t sit right with me 🤔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/21 12:21 AM
25

I think if sufficient time has not passed with OP learning to manage her PTSD and anxiety, she will still fall victim to LVM like this. She mentioned meeting him in June, and he knows all about her mental health condition that now he’s using it against her? Too soon to share trauma in the early vetting stages. I’m also detecting poor boundaries. Therapist tells you to give him another chance? Block and delete BOTH the therapist and the scrote. I don’t need a therapist telling me to give the bene…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/21 12:01 AM
9

SECONDING THIS! So much incredible character development. Incredible female interactions without annoying tropes. Love that it’s encouraging men take ownership of their issues, reflect and mature from their experiences.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 11:49 PM
31

100%! Also quality surgery and cosmetic procedures are virtually undetectable. People ask for exaggerated features from surgeons. Surgeons usually focus on balance and aesthetic, not exaggeration. The layperson assumes this is what ALL final results look like. Point is, she doesn’t know if Rashida Jones has had work done. And who gives a shit if she did or didn’t.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 11:36 PM
161

Oh my goodness this made me laugh soooo hard! We should troll haters and make them think FDS is just a HUGE marketing ploy for a vibrator company. Instead of coming at FDS for supposedly being a “hate sub”, they might think twice. I mean really, there’s nothing to suggest we’re not just a giant campaign pushing vibrator sales. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 11:08 PM
95

Super weird comment about her appearance. If a woman with surgery or fillers decided to take a stand against this destructive industry, does she get excluded for her appearance? I get your point and all, but ease up on the standard shaming. Her appearance is irrelevant to her moral standards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 10:58 PM
189

Read the handbook. Read top strategy posts on the sub. Read through FLUS too. Reread it all if you have to, to really absorb the advice. Before you ask questions, do your research. Devour all the advice. Comparison is the thief of joy. You are only seeing her highlight reel. You don’t know her story. You don’t know if she’s a massive PickMe desperate for male validation. Or maybe she’s just hustling dumb scrotes. Or maybe she’s an escort (quite frankly what you described sounds like the typical …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 11:05 AM
11

Credit the original commenter if it’s from this sub. Otherwise it looks like karma farming/stealing someone else’s content.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 09:13 AM
135

He is creepy af. I get mad rapey vibes from him. He also has the vibe of a guy who preys on high school girls.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/10/21 09:58 PM
14

This 100%! Balding has got to suck hard as it is. Having the confidence to just own it is attractive in and of itself. I’m not into bald guys, but power to the guys who own it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/10/21 10:12 AM
42

Beards hide a weak chin. I don’t trusted bearded men. I’ll only accept clean shaven or designer stubble. The latter is like a flex to the uggos that he can grow good facial hair with his superior genes while also showing off his killer jawline. 🤤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/10/21 07:37 AM
8

What a loser. My ex made it out that he was smarter than he was too, dude could barely comprehend a children’s book.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 10:27 PM
5

On the game or on you? Or both?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 10:21 PM
10

This is so wholesome. What a beautiful story. 🥰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 10:17 PM
3

Ummm sis, your brother sounds so wholesome. Send him my way!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/21 11:39 AM
53

These are the stories I am HERE for! I love the energy, enjoy yourself sis, that is how dating should be!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/21 11:19 AM
185

I’m so tired of women tolerating men like this. Like sis, there is more to life than being chained to a scrote. Be better to yourself. FFS
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/21 08:03 AM
-1

You’re preaching to the converted sis, I was a victim of DV as well. I am speaking from experience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 09:16 PM
52

You raise a valid point, however, what are we to do if we don’t have these conversations? Yes, victims need support and resources to leave abusive situations, and abusers are 100% to blame for abusive actions. I agree with that. But it is also important to encourage victims to reflect and hold themselves accountable for their own choices too. How else are they supposed to learn from their experiences? If we coddle people and don’t challenge them, they will not grow and learn. That is very danger…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 07:21 AM
157

Whenever I see a guy indicate loyalty as an expected trait, it’s always from an unhealthy place, almost never from a respectful relationship standpoint. I.e., he will cheat on her and expects that she tolerates it and stays with him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/21 12:41 AM
171

It’s wild when you run into people you used to be friends with or knew a long time ago! Just goes to show that not everyone puts effort into maturing and growing as a person. It’s such lazy behaviour. The person you stopped talking to 10 odd years ago is the exact same person you left, now just mentally stunted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/21 12:06 AM
186

Would be nice if we could compile some more examples so we all know what to avoid. Someone did compile information. It’s in the handbook. Also there’s heaps of posts to avoid RP tactics by other users. Just search through the sub using keywords. Here’s a few of my faves to get you started: 1 2 3 4 Enjoy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 09:55 AM
429

This is demented.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 08:39 AM
21

A girl can only hope. 🥰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 10:35 PM
49

It’s an issue that’s affecting men, e.g. PIED. It’s definitely going to get attention. They’ll find a way to blame the women though, not the men exploiting and degrading them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 10:34 PM
91

Women have to go to such insane lengths to get an iota of justice for the abuse they go through. I am so SO tired of how much men get away with abuse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 09:18 AM
210

LOL Samantha is the biggest pick me. All the women on SATC are. HVW: Leslie Knope and Donna from Parks and Rec. Rebecca and Keeley from Ted Lasso.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 07:42 AM
64

I feel like there’s this bizarre expectation for FDS to be everything for women’s needs. I imagine it’s because there aren’t enough women’s spaces online. But really it’s just not possible for one sub to cater to everyone’s needs. The mods can’t make everyone happy. I see some women oversharing their trauma expecting a trauma support therapy sub; newbies who shitpost screenshots showing they clearly haven’t read the handbook; WGTOW-esque defeatist posts. The list goes on. I’m not speaking for th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 01:36 PM
33

The problem is that there is just too much of those shitty posts, so quality content gets lost in it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 12:58 PM
27

There is. FDSSuperfans
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 12:51 PM
7

Fantastic post. This needs to be pinned.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 12:31 AM
93

The rich have socialised much of the poorer classes to believe that material goods have no worth/shouldn’t be coveted, just so the poor can keep their hands off what the rich exploits and hoards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 08:39 AM
115

I don’t think this has a one-size-fits-all response. To me personally, and within my culture as well, the ring is a huuuuge deal. It is a direct reflection of how much the man values the woman he wishes to spend his life with. A ring is also an asset and investment. Any man worth his salt knows this. Gold and gemstones are a solid investment. Price depends on salary, but traditionally it’s 3/4 yearly salary. But really it’s what he’s willing to spend. I have a friend whose husband spent much muc…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 08:12 AM
36

Did we have the same ex?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 12:22 AM
141

Dude was standing near the trash in the alley for a reason. He knows where he belongs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 07:57 AM
47

Relevant quote: “Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.” - JK Rowling.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 03:34 AM
162

Let’s be real though. In that two years (reportedly, only he knows if it was longer) he was using her, he did not care about her, he would have definitely done dodgy shit behind her back. So glad she left him. I hope she finds FDS!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 11:49 PM
27

The red flags are always there. Never ignore them ladies! I understand it’s hard if you care about someone, but you need to prioritise your own safety first. If someone has issues this deep, they don’t need a relationship. They need to work on themselves as they will 100% project it all onto the relationship. It is naive to think their issues won’t affect you. This is why FDS advocates for levelling up and being our best selves before even considering a relationship, because then we have the wis…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 10:01 PM
231

Nah, you’re spot on. If you have to brag about a good deed, you need to take a long hard look at yourself. True decency is doing the right thing regardless of whether anyone knows or is watching. This scrote is posting to the internet when he should be having this conversation with his wife.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 07:44 AM
28

It’s okay to read the books to be able to critically discuss them, but avid supporters of Rand are questionable at best.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 06:11 AM
30

Seconding what’s already been mentioned. Also any book by Ayn Rand.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 05:57 AM
11

I get it, I work with some LVM too. You keep interactions purely professional, don’t engage them beyond that. If they are pestering you, it’s your responsibility to assert clear boundaries as you cannot control their actions, only your own. You have to stay strong, don’t waste your energy and time on LVM. They eat into your time and it only stuffs you over, not them. If you have poor boundary setting skills, work on that. I recommend a book called Get Out Of Your Own Way by Mark Goulston. Quick …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 02:15 AM
36

Listen to your gut feeling. You’re obviously getting weird and uncomfortable vibes, stop making excuses for him and reduce contact. Being poor doesn’t necessarily mean you’re bad with money, don’t conflate the two. I grew up poor/working class, and my single mum was very capable with budgeting. This guy clearly feels entitled to what he cannot afford and has shitty credit as a result. Don’t overthink it. Believe men when they show you who they are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 01:54 AM
36

I was speaking about this to a friend recently. How messed up is it that animals have higher standards than humans? Male animals have to prove themselves to female animals as a worthy mate. Yet with humans it’s an absolute shitshow.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 12:12 AM
155

I’ve seen comments referring to women as “females”. No woman refers to women as “females” unless they’re talking about the sex of an animal or something that’s actually appropriate for the use of the word. It’s such a tell.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 01:04 PM
101

Wowowooww the audacity here is just next level shit!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 08:21 AM
43

My reporting hand is strong. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 08:13 AM
133

Yes! Lately I’ve seen a few posts and comments that are really snarky towards FDS principles and women who actually want to date. No one is forcing them to be here, yet they still make nasty comments. Such LV energy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 08:11 AM
63

Think about how your closest friends compliment you. How you compliment them. It’s usually quite personal and specific, yes? His compliments should match that energy, if not exceed it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 01:06 AM
18

That’s the best part. He takes time to reflect and process his anger, growing from each experience. In the beginning his anger was poorly directed, but you watch him learn to process it better. If only all men learnt how to do that. The character development is awesome for all characters in the show!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 12:40 PM
15

Yes!!! Roy Kent is the perfect man. 🤤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 10:02 AM
76

I was crying that she actually got the justice she deserved. It might seem silly, but it really hit me. I am so fucking tired of men not being held accountable for their actions against women. Life sentences for taking a life should be the norm. You take a life, then too bad, you give yours for it. The judge even set a precedent. This is such a massive deal! It’s a step toward actually holding police and authority figures accountable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 08:42 AM
130

This is just wholesome all round. So much love and energy put into this, not to mention such a beautiful father/son bonding activity. Ah, my icy heart has been warmed. I love love.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 08:24 AM
63

This is just depressing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 09:16 PM
73

A man wrote that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 11:39 AM
79

Plot twist: you never got the message in the first place because you blocked him from the get go.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 09:36 AM
5

Have a read of the comments in this post. There’s also a post somewhere in the handbook (I cannot remember exactly, tried looking) related to why sparks/butterflies are not healthy. It should help a lot. In saying that, butterflies and sparks aside, if you’re not finding a natural connection, that’s totally okay and you don’t have to force yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 04:43 AM
138

I agree with you, but to be brutally honest, it’s the lesser of two evils.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 03:11 AM
112

I find it hilarious that they assume every woman finds that attractive. The hardest of passes from me. I don’t want a “cute” man who’s squishy and weak. I’ll take the superior fit strong male who actually looks like he can protect and provide for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 05:18 AM
47

How she acts isn’t within your control, nor can you predict what she does. Ultimately, it doesn’t matter how she responds. Sure it’s not your job or your problem to deal with their relationship issues, but since you know his address, you don’t have to hunt her down on social media. If you want to share the knowledge that he’s a cheating narcissist, a simple letter to her with no sender details identifying you would be the best thing you can do. With all that digging you did, surely you learned h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 03:58 PM
11

I second this. I hate the screenshots of gross LVM stories from other subs. I have to say though, the mods do an awesome job taking down trash reposts, those LVM war stories don’t last that long thankfully. It’s usually people who haven’t read the handbook just spamming the sub. I don’t understand why people waste energy and time reading sad posts from other subs and go as far to repost it here? Like it’s so much energy wasted on a pathetic LVM. I understand if we share our own experiences, what…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 03:44 PM
231

Sending him a long message will only help him hide his lies better with the next woman. I would suggest sending a message to the wife instead, they might not even be separated and he could just be cheating on her. Who knows how many others there were before you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 05:22 AM
2

This makes total sense. I see where you’re coming from now and I agree with you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/21 11:50 PM
2

My point was not about reflecting to stay in a relationship. My point was about reflection on one’s own choices in general. Taking ownership of the decisions we make as we are responsible for our own actions, we cannot control the actions of others. Not sure how that was missed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/21 12:13 PM
19

Hard disagree. Not reflecting on your own choices and behaviours is really emotionally immature. Claiming that it is entirely up to “choosing well” is putting the onus of the relationship dynamics solely on the other person, and refusing to acknowledge your role in that relationship. Regardless of relationship context, ie friend/family/partner, that’s extremely unhealthy and unfair on them. It’s actually quite narcissistic. Reflection = self-awareness and growth. Reflecting on the choices we mad…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/21 10:10 AM
20

The handbook has an excellent post on coping with breakups, as well as other posts related to investing in yourself to feel good. Have a read, it will help a lot!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/21 09:48 AM
135

I know we’re all about ‘block and delete’ with guys who don’t make the cut, but this is such a brilliantly ruthless way to break things off. I love it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/21 08:06 AM
44

I’m a big advocate of meeting new people through fun activities like volunteering and hobby groups. I love trying new things, even if I end up being terrible at it! If you’re keen to meet a guy, try an activity outside of your comfort zone and outside of traditionally feminine activities. Everyone is different and some women don’t like being approached in this scenario (that’s totally cool!). As long as the guy isn’t just casting his net and actually taking a genuine interest in you, I think it’…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 06:04 AM
93

They conditioned women to lower their standards and accept less than the bare minimum.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 04:15 AM
407

Nah, we need to bring back shame. Shame is great. Shame helps keep shittiness in check. Fuck this fragile society we live in and being overly understanding of bullshit feelings. Shame the freaks so they can go back into hiding and hopefully die out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 01:20 AM
48

HAHAHA YES!!! It’s so unattractive and just desperate sounding. Porn is so pathetic and sad. Watching porn is even worse. Like imagine being that inferior a human. Desperately pawing at yourself while you ogle a screen instead of being intimate with an actual person.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 01:08 PM
11

Red flags are always there. Your comment is incredibly condescending towards women. We are not damsels. We are capable beings with agency. I’ve been in an abusive relationship. Being coddled and enabled didn’t pull me out of it. Tough love did.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 01:00 PM
10

Better to be called crazy and leave an abuser, than to worry what people think of you and have a child that will also be subjected to abuse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 12:51 PM
9

You’re oversimplifying my original comment. I wrote women who “choose to”. Women have agency and can be responsible for their actions and decisions too. We can choose to stop allowing ourselves getting walked all over, have standards and boundaries, and leave abusive men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 12:47 PM
19

I agree with you. But to be brutally honest, in all abusive relationships, there are ALWAYS red flags. ALWAYS. Unfortunately a lot of women are socialised to look past those flags and continue to tolerate abuse. The second there are kids in the picture I could not give a shit about either the woman or the man, all my sympathy extends to those children. They didn’t ask to be born into an abusive life, deprived of a healthy upbringing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 12:16 PM
29

PREACH!!! You’re not an asshole at all, sis. It is cruel and selfish to choose to have children with a horrible man. Having a child will not magically change a fundamentally shitty person. Women need to understand that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 11:24 AM
199

That’s some weirdass fantasy these weebs get from hentai. Women just orgasm at the sight of his dick. He’s so powerful 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 04:36 AM
104

She would’ve worn it with pride, and likely paid for it herself 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 03:08 AM
221

Was she picked though?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 03:02 AM
192

SHE AIN’T IN THE MOOD FOR YOUR SHIT DICK
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 02:40 AM
76

I get myself whatever I want, whenever I want. I work so damn hard, I deserve it. When I’ve smashed major goals? I get myself something luxurious. I love this because every time I go to use the item, I always remember the wonderful memory associated with it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 01:32 AM
91

ONE OF US! ONE OF US!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 04:44 PM
5

URSULA LE GUIN IS LIIIIIFE. I second this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 03:46 AM
155

Also legislation changes by the time he needs a refill.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 10:55 AM
384

He should also have two consultations with two different doctors, as well as a discussion with his local church minister. His wife should be present for all of this of course.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 10:45 AM
331

The communities they’re active in make it so much better. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 06:16 AM
23

I completely get where you’re coming from. I think it’s important to remember that a (healthy) relationship is a bonus on an already complete and fulfilling life. You don’t have to be dating right now. Keep investing in yourself and work on your growth. Not healthy to be dating when you can see that you’re in an emotionally vulnerable place, a narcissist would have a field day. Boundary setting becomes second nature after a while. You will eventually get to a place where you’re confident in your…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 10:36 AM
22

Doesn’t even need to be that extreme. People might think they’re being helpful, but really they’re offering destructive advice because that’s all they know, e.g. “give him a chance”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 10:19 AM
33

If you think you have to see a potential partner as the enemy, then you’re missing the point that FDS is trying to make. FDS isn’t just applicable to intimate partner relationships, but all relationships. FDS advocates for having boundaries and standards to keep yourself safe. A person who loves you will respect your boundaries, but it is still your job to assert them. If that is tiring for you, you have work to do. Therapy, self-development, and my ongoing growth journey has only taught me to l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 10:16 AM
107

If you rephrase that question, it’s like they’re basically asking “should I have self-respect and standards my whole life?” How low these women must feel about themselves, that asserting their own personal boundaries is tiring for them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 07:43 AM
124

This is absolute gold. Even if you share with friends or family, they can often give unhelpful, even harmful advice. Save the oversharing for a therapist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 12:44 AM
652

I love a good roast-a-scrote. The fact that he had to state he doesn’t want sex or money ONLY makes me think he wants sex and money. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/21 11:30 AM
85

I get what you’re saying and agree with much of it. However, it’s worth noting that a lot of those guys are underage minors with a very limited worldview, still mentally undeveloped, and have no prosocial role models in their real life. I’m not justifying their actions, and think the conspiracy stuff is insane, but I think that the movement is ultimately starting a conversation and challenging the status quo. I think the movement will allow for other movements to grow from it, movements that are…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/21 06:17 AM
67

Regardless of faith, I think you’re doing a fantastic job parenting your children and monitoring their screen time. Exodus Cry (part of the TraffickingHub movement) do a great job explaining how dangerous porn exposure is for children, and how children are groomed even through random things they come across online.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/21 06:09 AM
86

He’s not looking for his next girl hun, he’s looking for the next woman to masturbate into. If he is pornsick, he was probably on OLD the whole time. Block and delete. Keep your head high and focus on you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 02:33 AM
418

🙄🙄🙄 They can bitch when they’ve had to use hidden money to escape a dangerous relationship, trying to protect their children and selves. Not all men but ENOUGH men to justify having a fuck off fund. Don’t listen to this drivel. PROTECT YOURSELVES LADIES.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 02:30 AM
4

Don’t justify yourself to people you don’t want to have anything to do with. A simple “sorry, I’m busy” should suffice. If they pester you, don’t respond. They’ll get the hint after a while.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 01:07 PM
169

Ah yes, shills for the patriarchy. The type of women who think fucking around with a married man is fun, the women who go on to do porn, who think that degrading themselves is somehow empowering. Men don’t respect or care for these women, but will exploit and use them nonetheless. Those women will learn the hard way. If they learn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/21 02:40 AM
60

Flosses. I am a nut for oral hygiene. I can smell that nasty rotten gingivitis stank of someone who doesn’t floss and it is nauseating. 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/21 01:56 AM
8

LOL I know. I’m being a smartass in my comment, with the aim making scrotes mad. I thought that was pretty clear.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/21 09:55 PM
10

All that went through my head when I saw the title and scrolled through the list was: 21) Just don’t date these men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/21 11:34 AM
256

A mentally healthy man is attracted to grown adult women. If they want to pull the “biology” card, they should be attracted to fit/healthy curves on a grown woman - strong thick legs and butts (able to healthily rear children) and large breasts (to nourish their children). If they are attracted to children, they cannot pull the “biology” card, because by their own logic, they are defective as men. This is dysfunctional behaviour, since they should be driven to protect their children, not want to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/21 11:24 AM
58

That’s a lot of words for “my penis is very small and it makes me angry at the world”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/21 11:31 AM
52

HAHAHAH YES 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/21 11:26 AM
108

Look at it as a lesson to learn from. No point ripping yourself apart for something you cannot go back in time to change. All you can do is reflect, learn from it and not repeat it moving forward.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 03:35 AM
53

This is exactly how I felt when I rewatched it, he is so gross. Ben and Leslie made it all better though, such a HV couple. And Donna is just goals! Ultimate HVW!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 10:33 PM
15

We got you ❤️ The most important thing I forgot to stress is: when temptation hits do not self-sabotage by looking him up on social media or the like. Erase him from your life and just focus on taking your time to heal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 07:21 AM
37

Hey sis, very sorry to hear this happened. I’ve been through similar, as have many of us here. Remember that you’re not alone. We’re all here for you. After my own D-Day, I was in a very bad way. My world turned upside down, but now I’m stronger than ever. Finding FDS was life changing for me. Sounds cheesy, but I’d never felt more validated in my life. All the thoughts and beliefs I’d had about balancing being a radfem and surviving in a patriarchal society, I wasn’t alone. Read the book “Leave…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 03:01 AM
21

😱😱😱 How did I not even think of them?! The ultimate HV couple!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 08:37 AM
123

There are far too many to list. Like almost all portrayals of relationships. The only enemies to lovers situation I’ve seen done well is Jake and Amy from B99. Still not the best relationship, since Jake’s a manchild and Amy is constantly mothering him. I think that because there are so many trash couples, it’s good to look for examples of positive relationships. I think Roy and Keeley from Ted Lasso are a good example of a healthy relationship. Roy is just straight up HV. Also Johnny and Moira …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 12:15 AM
304

I used to idolise Jim/Pam when I was younger. Then I rewatched the office years later and I realised how lazy Jim is (still a hilarious guy, but crappy partner), and how annoyingly weak Pam was. I also realised it’s actually Dwight’s level up journey. I mean, the show ends on Dwight’s story, if Jim and Pam were the central characters, it would end on them. Dwight grows and learns and becomes this fantastic guy, it was such a wholesome journey.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 11:55 PM
97

My spidey senses go off when I see odd and unrelated descriptions of themselves. My brain starts signalling hard “a man wrote this”. The post will just take a weird turn at some point and all of a sudden these men are describing their pornsick fantasy, however subtle or obvious, putting weird and unnecessary descriptions about appearance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/21 11:10 PM
10

So true. I learnt the hard way that straight male “friends” are just playing the long game. They’re so entitled thinking they have a chance when I’ve never lead them on, only made it clear that we were friends. Nope, still didn’t work. They didn’t respect my boundaries so I cut them out of my life. I don’t waste my energy on straight male friends anymore, I just don’t feel safe around them. I feel so much more comfortable and safer around my girlfriends, knowing they haven’t got a creepy ulterio…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/21 10:55 PM
91

This is a major red flag. Any woman with basic decency would take a step back and respect the girlfriend or wife to prevent any misunderstanding. If the woman doesn’t have that decency, it’s the man’s call to be assertive and enforce boundaries that he is in a relationship, and to prevent any issues, he would like their friendship to be transparent and including the girlfriend or wife. The man is responsible since he’s the one in the relationship. If she gets butthurt about this then she wanted …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/21 12:35 AM
19

I agree with all points here wholeheartedly. The left has really marginalised a huge proportion of women, and it’s just been getting worse. Also, you’re not alone. I’ve definitely thought that the state of leftwing politics has become something plotted by the right, to infiltrate and exploit the lefts vulnerabilities and use it against them (e.g. “inclusivity”) I also can’t stand anyone without a backbone and not standing for a cause. I don’t consider those people actually moderate though. They’…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 01:34 PM
93

Don’t waste your breath on people who are not seeking to understand. You’re only going to age prematurely by stressing yourself for someone who doesn’t give a shit. If they do take an interest and are open to a sincere discussion, then go for it. If not, just leave them to their own devices because if you don’t you come across as the know-it-all that knows what’s best for them, which only reinforces their original views.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 01:11 PM
75

I second this. I go for centrist/moderate (left leaning) men because that aligns with my personal views. I think men like this have a well-rounded character and are critical thinkers. They usually are willing to participate in constructive dialogue, whereas their far left/right counterparts just want to scream their opinions at you. Moderates get shit done. Far right/left just want to argue. I just know I’ve never had to argue about women’s rights and needs to a man with centrist views like this…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 08:27 AM
142

I thought the exact same thing! She’s unique and definitely not like other girls. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 03:53 AM
23

This is an excellent post but just a minor issue with point 4. This is only LV behaviour if it’s not agreed upon. It’s not uncommon for some (decent men) to trust women with managing household finances (not making her do unpaid labour as his accountant), as in she has her own income and that’s exclusively hers to do what she wants, his income is the family/shared income. I’ve known some good men who are wonderful providers, and specifically state her money is her money, and his money is their mo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 02:59 AM
28

This 100%! OPs ex got in way too quickly with a response. Sounds like he’s talking from experience. Wouldn’t surprise me if he’s a cheater.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 01:01 AM
265

It’s important to teach your children boundaries. This mother has shown us a useful example of how she approves playtime for her son.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 12:44 AM
53

Somebody send this article headline to Jane Gilmore to fix. She’ll sort out the mess and reframe it to be a more accurate reflection of the situation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 12:41 AM
170

Congratulations! You made an excellent choice. Just make sure to stick to your decision. You only uncovered the tip of the iceberg, I guarantee there are horrors you haven’t uncovered. For the sake of your own mental health, don’t try to uncover more. Just stick to your decision and put yourself first. Believe him when he shows you who he is. A porn addict is nothing to take lightly. Like all addicts they will keep hiding their addiction and you will end up a victim of it. Remember that if he tr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 12:48 AM
7

Of course. They would eventually move on to the real thing as they’ve become desensitised to the dolls. If anything, it’s extremely disturbing to use a human replica doll for sexual acts. Shows how they really view women, a tool to masturbate into. There is a pro though: their shitty genes won’t be passed on because they’re not having sex with real people. Natural selection doing its thing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 12:36 AM
5

I will be as judgy as I want because you wouldn't believe how many people look down on me. And there it is. You’re insecure so you put other women down to feel better. Right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 03:16 PM
2

Funny how you deleted your comment. If you stand by what you said why not leave it up. You literally stated you looked down on women who get surgery. You don’t know each woman’s story. Stop being so judgy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 03:07 PM
2

Wow. What a sweeping generalisation to make. And what are you? Their saviour? Get over yourself! A lot of those women are very well informed actually. A lot of those women are educated, intelligent women. They made a choice based on their own personal reasons. Whatever conditioning contributed to that is tragic, but sometimes therapy is not enough. If surgery alleviates her distress, then who are you to judge. Also, the person I responded to literally stated they looked down on women who got sur…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 03:02 PM
9

I look down on women who look down on women. Women are already dragged enough by men, they don’t need more shit piled onto them. If surgery alleviates some of the misery a woman’s experiencing, then so be it. Get over yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 02:45 PM
16

LET’S NOT STANDARD SHAME OUR SISTERS. This is what men want, to divide us so that we’re tearing each other down. Yes, the plastic surgery industry is exploitative of women, a lot of stereotypically feminine things are performative. All of this is true and then some. But hey, you don’t know her story, neither do I, so no judging or negging. Let go of that negative energy, and get off your damn high horse. If getting work done makes her feel less shitty and able to get out of bed to face another d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 02:37 PM
16

Don’t justify yourself, you don’t owe anyone an explanation. Do whatever you want and make sure it’s for you. Don’t let anyone standard shame you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 02:31 PM
13

This is very very creepy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 03:53 AM
182

Hobby groups! Try cooking classes, artsy crafty stuff, fitness related, whatever floats your boat. Also volunteering. It’s a great way to meet people and you already have something in common!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 12:54 AM
14

This is adorable and so wholesome!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 12:40 AM
63

You’re spot on. Their masculinity isn’t defined by disempowering women, it’s defined by their strength, maturity, and compassion.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 12:37 AM
26

I have a theory that these type of men are disproportionately LVM. And even if they weren't LVM before they became famous, I think the fame corrupts them when they see how easy it is to get away with things. They let it get to their head and start trying to get away with more and more depraved acts. Yep! That’s the entire point the show BoJack Horseman was trying to make. How corrupt and entitled fame makes you, how it cultivates narcissism.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 12:30 AM
268

It saddens me that the woman describing the most humiliating moment for her insisted she wasn’t raped. If you are coerced into engaging in a behaviour that you are not 100% enthusiastic about, and it is purely for the sexual gratification of the other party, that is a form of sexual assault.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 09:20 AM
3

OMG YES!!! Roy is everything! The perfect man 🤤🤤🤤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 06:23 AM
12

Is there actual gold weaved into her hair or something? What am I missing here??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 02:59 AM
28

I’m really digging Ted Lasso rn. It’s wholesome and funny. Plenty of HV characters. I was super sceptical when I first heard of it, another story of a woman scorned 🙄 I gave it a shot and it’s actually great! Ted is a wonderful character, always makes the best of a shitty situation. The lead female character (Rebecca) is a badass and just goals. Her character development is incredible. I love her! Development in all the characters in the show is great in general. Lots of introspection and levell…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 02:56 AM
10

Oh my goddess I relate to this so much! My NV ex struggled to keep his plants alive. He paid close attention to how he was meant to care for each one, but no matter what he did, they still all died! Meanwhile, I was always just chatting up my plants, effortlessly cultivating a forest. I could see he was low key seething how my babies thrived. I don’t blame his plants for dying, he brought toxicity everywhere he went, it was bound to happen!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 11:39 PM
23

There is a major difference between vetting someone you are going to date and obsessively stalking someone you once had a superficial interaction with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:24 PM
33

I love it when men have big strong attractive hands and forearms (and bodies in general) 😅 Fair enough though if only one seems weirdly toned and defined compared to the other.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 11:51 AM
165

Most men age like milk. I rarely see men looking after themselves to help age well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 09:14 PM
129

This is absolutely true. They’ve already learned they can get away with walking all over you, why would they bother getting out of their comfort zone and changing that. A decent person would tell you that you need to be assertive and firm with boundaries and it’s not okay to put up with shit that makes you unhappy. A LV drop kick will take advantage of your poor boundaries and drain you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 12:34 PM
36

What a crock of shit. If we were all lazy entitled assholes like this pissweasel, nothing would get done. So yeah, be useful. That’s not a gendered thing, that’s just life. And FFS women have to work 100x harder for a modicum of the recognition and credit men get. Double that if you’re a WOC.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 12:30 PM
71

Don’t give it your energy or attention. Biggest power move is not caring at all. Even hate takes energy. A Queen does not waste her time with trivial matters.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 07:28 AM
193

People like this are mega insecure and unable to function on their own. They avoid learning how to manage their issues and are super codependent and desperate for validation from any external source since they have zero self-assurance skills. It’s pretty narcissistic behaviour.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 07:26 AM
44

Nah, it’s definitely a rape dungeon.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 03:48 AM
668

He also indicated he’s an alpha. He’s obviously a superior human being that deserves a live in sex slave. He said he’s an alpha so he must be. He’s clearly a catch! We’re so lucky to have been graced by his ad. I love it when sociopaths are kind enough to out themselves. I wish they all advertised themselves like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 03:45 AM
3

It might, just delete and repost with sub names, otherwise you’re breaking sub rules.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 01:03 AM
41

This is exactly what I thought when I read it. It reeks of a sunk cost fallacy mentality, “oh I better just settle for the old wife, been together that long no point leaving now”. Nah fuck that, if he feels like his wife isn’t an incredible person to spend his life with and treasures every day with her, then yeah, fuck off and stop wasting her time. People do a disservice to each other by stringing the other person along in a relationship when they’re not happy. It’s cruel forcing someone to liv…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 12:49 AM
9

Cross out sub names before reposting their content.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 12:39 AM
33

This is such a good point. I think you should make a standalone post about women with toxic cheating behaviours/ women who throw other women under the bus, and strategies how to manage them when you can’t avoid them, e.g coworker, boss, partner of ex when there’s coparenting requirements, etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 06:53 AM
6

I hope she wakes up and sees how hard she’s getting played and strung along. Meanwhile, we’ll just keep our healthy standards and firm boundaries with all that “masculine energy” she accused FDS users of exuding.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 06:37 AM
10

Nah, sis. You’re making excuses for problem behaviour. None of what you’ve said aligns with FDS. Have a read of the handbook.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 05:53 AM
17

Good point! I’m in the same boat, I feel like most people in an age gap relationship know that it’s creepy and keep it on the DL.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/21 11:41 PM
47

I’m afraid that NC is the only way with people like that, regardless of whether they are family. She will keep pushing her wants onto you and disrespecting your autonomy, yet alone boundaries. She has been conditioned that being a wife and mother is the only value women have, and won’t stop guilt-tripping/manipulating/disrespecting you. You can’t control how she thinks and behaves, but you do have control over yourself and whether you choose to continue that relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/21 03:16 AM
26

Just direct her to read/watch everything Gail Dines. If she doesn’t get it after that, she’s an idiot and it’s time to cut your losses.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/21 01:49 AM
97

Trauma informed therapy. Lots and lots of therapy. When you’re in a better headspace and less likely to be triggered by case studies, read ‘The Body Keeps Score’, and ‘The Gift of Fear’.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/21 01:26 AM
45

Why is it your job to save her? This is no different to trying to change a man. She is capable of making her own decisions and will do what she wants regardless of how much sense you try to slap into her. If she wanted to put her head down and work hard to get a respectable job (that won’t render her unemployable anywhere else and essentially force her to stay in the sex trade), she would. Ditch the saviour complex and focus on your own level up journey. That’s the best example you can set for a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/21 01:22 AM
25

Not at all. We can have empathy but still call a spade a spade. Let’s be real here, if the roles were reversed we would be telling the woman she needs to leave this codependent mess that has no identity of their own and identifies themselves as an extension of their partner. It’s a very toxic scenario and OP has work to do on herself before she even considers a relationship. She would’ve been a very uninteresting and draining partner to be with. Zero self-worth and self-respect, completely depen…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 11:09 PM
76

Prostitution is exploitative, degrading, and dehumanising. It is men profiting off the sexual slavery and commodification of women. If it was as empowering as neolibs claim it is, it would be a male dominated industry with few women to be seen.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 07:27 AM
111

I get really frustrated when both male and female westerners have a saviour complex. They have this weird wokespeak, tread on eggshells around us, and act like they’re going to “trigger” ethnically diverse people over everything. If anything, westerners get more offended over trivial shit than we do. We know how to pick our battles and are typically mindful not to take everything so personally. I gravitate towards people who just treat me with dignity and respect. They are able to appreciate me …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 06:04 AM
5

People disagreeing with you does not make them “xenophobic”. Our ethnicity and cultural beliefs are irrelevant to the discussion. My disagreement does not come from a place of hatred. It just sounded like you were making bizarre excuses for a narcissistic abuser.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 01:36 AM
13

Soul tie? That sounds like nonsense to me and it sounds more like he was triangulating you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 01:16 AM
274

Excellent point. If only we had good faith male lurkers on FDS, who don’t post but just learn ways to become the best version of themselves, and treat women with dignity and compassion. Ah, it’s nice to dream.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 02:51 AM
9

Fucking yikes. This is some next level manipulation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 02:46 AM
34

Wow. She must feel like a terrible mother for raising such an ungrateful son.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 01:28 AM
8

Another book I’d recommend on boundary setting is “Get Out of Your Own Way” by Mark Goulston. Very practical and realistic advice that is applicable to all areas of life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 01:27 AM
53

Never underestimate the power of being underestimated. Playing dumb and responding sickly sweet to passive aggressive remarks is so much sweeter when they try to put you down more but you follow up and destroy them with quick wit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 11:36 AM
17

The woman is not being criticised for having her unhealthy behaviour called out. Calling out poor decision making is not a put down. This is why women stay in these toxic relationships for too long. Dysfunctional and unhealthy choices are enabled by people who coddle the victim and don’t label the abuse for what it is. Staying with abusers is not healthy and sometimes victims need to be slapped into reality. And yes, cheating is abuse- emotional and psychological. You’ve been gaslit and forced t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 11:01 AM
36

Dating a coworker is doable if you no longer work together or if one of you is relocating workplaces. HUGE mistake if you still stay in the same work place. Way too risky. Definitely do not shit where you eat. edit: I tried to reply but your comment is gone. Anyway, I would imagine that’s the safest way (re what you wrote originally), I’ve done that. It can get way too messy if you’re in the same office/area, especially if one party doesn’t respond to a break up maturely, can make your professio…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 10:48 AM
24

They exist. Albeit few and far between, and you definitely won’t find them on OLD. Any guy worth his salt is doing all the fulfilling stuff we expect of ourselves on FDS, i.e. career/study/friendships/productive hobbies and interests etc. I find that the moment you’re not looking to meet someone is when you do. Just keep living your life and Mr Right-For-You may come along. Or he may not, and that’s okay too!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 12:57 AM
148

He should be slowly dunked into a vat of acid as punishment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 01:14 PM
65

Is she being sarcastic? Is this a joke? ???? Please tell me it’s a joke. Please.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 01:13 PM
88

Last comment is pretty accurate though. I know these men are scrotatious hypocrites, but hey, at least they’re honest. Besides the scrotes audacity, I also find the audacity of libfems to be hilarious. The fact that they’re offended when men don’t give them the response they wanted that “prostitution is eMpOwErInG”. No shit, sis, no shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 12:48 PM
286

Oh my goddess!!! I never thought to refer to porn as that! You are spot on! From now on, I shall refer to porn as “rape on tape” as that is exactly what it is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 12:38 PM
779

Annnnd another one! So many hiking “date” victims. DO NOT GO ON “DATES” TO SECLUDED PLACES IN THE EARLY STAGES OF COURTING. NO NO NO HE WILL RAPE AND/OR K.LL YOU. YOU ARE WALKING INTO YOUR OWN DEMISE. And before lurkers spam with that “not all men” bullshit, idgaf. TOO MANY MEN!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 08:52 AM
252

Sexual coercion is real. Men COERCE for sex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 03:32 AM
6

Why are you giving this man another platform? Bad publicity is still publicity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 03:26 AM
31

To be fair, if you have low self-esteem/think you’re not worthy of good things, you’re more likely to accept shitty partners because you think you deserve that treatment/it’s normal to you. So by that logic, to some extent, our mindset matters in what we attract. Being able to see the red flags of a narcissist or toxic NVM, having strong self-assurance and self-worth, all of this is important to prevent falling into dysfunctional relationships.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 09:47 PM
26

I am a massive coffee snob. If a cafe doesn’t stock the soy milk I live for, I bail. Since that’s how I feel about cafes and soy milk, my standards for a man are definitely non-negotiable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 09:37 PM
102

OMG sis, she is straight up gaslighting you! This woman is awful!!! The second she moves out and gives the key back, block and delete her from your life. Also, change your locks in case she made key copies and potentially has a chip on her shoulder.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 09:47 AM
24

Metalhead looking dude had me in tears 🤣🤣🤣 I love it when men roast NVM!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 08:51 AM
31

Reddit alone isn’t enough. This guy needs to be banned from life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 08:31 AM
18

Read through the handbook. There are so many posts that will help you in developing your own standards and boundaries.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 08:22 AM
56

Your first problem here is that you entered a long distance relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 08:20 AM
135

OMG right?! Once you go to living alone it is so hard to go back! It’s tough competition since the company needs to be better than your own!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 11:14 AM
351

This sounds like a living situation from hell. I’m so glad for you that she’s leaving! Your home is meant to be your safe haven, to come home to more stress after a hard days work is awful. If you’re in the financial position to live alone, I strongly recommend it, it’s incredible! If not, I hope your next roommate is a decent person.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 11:10 AM
3

Came here to say something along these lines but you nailed it. OP please reflect on your own choices. Remember that you are the star of your own life story, you are making these decisions that only affect you. Check out this post from the handbook. Then take as long as possible reading through the rest of the handbook, journal where you went wrong and what you have learned from your choices. Only then will you be able to break the cycle of bad decision making. You got this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 04:27 AM
2

There are heaps of useful posts in identifying red flags in the handbook. Check it out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 02:55 AM
861

They approached her for advice. They forfeited their right to be offended when they asked her to be direct and honest. Yet somehow her brother and family are butthurt because it didn’t work out in their favour when the gf didn’t submit to being a doormat. The audacity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 02:53 AM
15

And then she got killed in the most cowardly way. Not a fair fight at all. Perseus was a pathetic lil bitch.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 11:48 PM
12

She’s constantly shit stirring and aligns her views with the next trendy controversy that gives her more publicity. I swear she’s the female Kanye.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 11:44 PM
38

Thank you! I’m glad someone said it! I find “celebrity” types a poor example for relationship goals since both the men and women tend to be emotionally immature and narcissistic. And of course they are! People praise them like gods, put them on a pedestal. They are just people with privilege that so desperately rely on external validation, it’s pathetic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 10:39 PM
196

Domestic violence is not taken seriously enough. She could be within an inch of her life and cops would still be on the fence about laying charges. Meanwhile, a black person will be walking while black and four cops are already staring them down ready to make an arrest.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 10:25 PM
63

Any ways to keep myself busy so the impact of pain is lessened? This is the best time to absolutely devour the handbook. Read and reread every single post until it is drilled into your head. I did the exact same thing in my recovery from a NV ex. FDS became my go-to resource because of the straightforward no-nonsense tough love approach. I also then bought and read a lot of the recommended books because they’re extremely helpful. I found that FDS and the recommended books didn’t just help with m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 11:00 AM
5

Your sister puts other women down to feel better about herself. She should instead dare to question why women have been socialised to dye their hair, instead of putting them down for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 02:30 AM
43

I, too, cannot stand all “influencers”. All they “influence” is the decline of humanity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 12:40 AM
244

I hate that saying: “not real men”. These men are very real. They are real enough to feel entitled to claiming human lives. Humans with families and friends, mind you, that just lost their loved ones in a gruesome way. Stating that these men aren’t “real” is helping shift the blame, dissociating men from the cycle of violence they perpetuate. These men are VERY real men. They are your friends, your family, your coworkers, strangers you walk past. They are every shitty comment that has not been c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 12:35 AM
120

I know a few decent men who are solid providers to their families and frequently state “her money is her money, my money is our money”. He still gets himself what he needs and wants, but being a generous provider to his wife is non-negotiable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 12:13 AM
47

The first two rules should be “do not talk about FDS”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 11:44 PM
62

A better alternative is a metal nail file. In my country carrying a weapon in public is a criminal offence. A cop friend once told me that if it’s for my safety, to carry a metal nail file. No cop would bat an eye over a woman carrying a nail file.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 11:43 PM
31

We exist, sis. We have fulfilling lives outside of the internet 😉
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 11:14 AM
176

You had me at “I am honestly a bit sick of listening to men talk”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 01:34 PM
92

It’s totally okay to feel this way! We create value and meaning in our lives by doing what is fulfilling to us, but it’s completely human to want intimacy and companionship. What’s important is that you’re not blinded by your desire for this when it comes to vetting men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 01:31 PM
106

Girl, these fuckboys will be balls deep in some pick me, at the same time they will look you dead in the eye and deny they’re cheating, gaslight you that she’s just a friend. SMH
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 12:41 PM
219

I think this is an important reminder to us all. Pick me’s go through a martyr phase, and I think we all went through it at some point in our pick me stage too. Suffering in a relationship or environment that was toxic and suffocating, convincing ourselves we had to endure to prove we tried our hardest. FUCK THAT. NEVER AGAIN. You don’t owe anyone shit. Look after yourself because no one will care for you like you can.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 07:39 AM
617

She is definitely not an asshole, but she is a massive chump for tolerating this sort of pathetic behaviour. His kid = his responsibility. She is not his wife. This is not her problem.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 04:28 AM
27

Mmmm yes please, couple that with behaving like a mature adult making mature adult decisions and it’s all sincere, not a facade. What a man indeed. 🤤 Ah, how low the bar remains.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 02:06 PM
9

Genuine question, what is NWT value? Because my brain can’t think of anything but “new with tags” rn 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 02:03 PM
190

I work in a predominantly female professional environment, besides the PickMe minority, overall it’s a wholesome team. Most of the women I work with are forces to be reckoned with. We work in a high stress serious role, so seeing the incredible women who juggle life’s other demands with our work is inspiring. Not to mention the sweet friendly compliments (with no sexual undertones/ulterior motive), witty banter, and just generally positive energy makes our work more bearable. Even the PickMe’s g…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 09:05 AM
14

Pretty much everything medusa posts is on point. Also (so hard to narrow it down): Don’t stroke his ego in the early stages Fighting your own biology Comfort tests, shit tests, and healthy vetting Boundaries - this is mine, that is yours Low value people lack nuance All men benefit from shitty men
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 08:40 AM
20

That’s not corny, that’s bloody adorable and wholesome. You’re spot on, healthy relationships should fit you just right, make you feel safe and at home. My heart is just so damn warmed right now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 08:39 AM
12

Don’t feel bad. I’m not advocating for him at all but I can see why Jordan Peterson has been able to cultivate the following he has. He talks a lot about personal responsibility which likely resonates with a lot of people fatigued by the issues brought on by the woke left and their ID politics. Although he has nasty undertones in his message, and doesn’t acknowledge he came from a place of privilege to be able to achieve what he did. Superficially, his points can be helpful, e.g. take ownership …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 02:59 PM
91

If she confronts him she is probably going to be killed or assaulted. This behaviour is extremely abnormal and deeply concerning. She has only uncovered the tip of the iceberg, his deviancy is likely much worse than what she has found.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 11:53 AM
61

The audacity of scrotes is ridiculous, yet still does not surprise me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 02:17 AM
96

I think this is a very important point, but it’s also important to be mindful that porn is a symptom of the problem of patriarchy, not the cause. Male entitlement and exploitation of women existed long before porn got big. In saying that, porn has expedited the extreme rates of female degradation and exploitation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 02:14 AM
24

There’s a major difference between acknowledging someone is conventionally attractive (being objective) and having personal feelings for them (being subjective).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 01:05 AM
11

What helped me find the courage to go NC was realising that the very people who had a holier than thou attitude would say and do the most morally bankrupt things. Continuing to let them stay in my life, knowing full well exactly the type of people they are, felt like it would then become a reflection of my own character, that I was complicit since I continued a relationship with them. Integrity is really important to me, so I could not allow these relationships. Take your time and do what feels …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 12:04 AM
54

When you can sis, cut out the toxic family that bring no value and warmth into your life. Boundary violations don’t stop, they just keep getting worse. They will keep sapping your energy, they are emotional vampires. Your family won’t change because you’re the common denominator with your differing beliefs. The best decision I ever made was going NC with most my family. I tried to tolerate some aspects of their right wing views, but when it got to the point where they spouted straight up vitriol…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 11:23 PM
60

I love how savage this is. It’s the brutal slap back to reality we all didn’t realise we needed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 11:05 PM
62

While I would never explain myself and just block and delete, if I ever faced this situation, I would text him the number to a charity emergency financial assistance line to deliver the final blow to his audacity 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/21 11:58 PM
61

I am definitely going to keep you locked up in my basement. There, fixed it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/21 06:14 AM
13

You have nailed it. I’m in the same boat as you. Getting responses bordering on violent for the gentlest of rejections was just not worth my time and energy anymore. And spot on, they are grown adults, it is not our job to teach them how to graciously accept a rejection.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 10:29 PM
416

This is why you block and delete. Don’t bother wasting energy justifying your reasoning for not wanting to pursue anything. Just cut him off completely!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 05:22 AM
54

This is a new level of sad and desperate. No bro. You need to go do something positive and let go of your dick once in a while.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 02:05 AM
134

Seeing shit like this makes me think humanity has run its course. There are men who travelled to the moon, and then there’s this guy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 12:53 AM
79

That was a wild ride of a post. The TLDR didn’t even align with his message.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 10:49 PM
26

The entire handbook is helpful in setting standards. The first post itself tackles how to establish Queen energy from day one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 10:02 AM
1

A sub where women go their own way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 09:54 AM
209

Why would you try to find someone you’re trying to avoid??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 07:32 AM
6

Ethan knows what’s up. Ethan can stay.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 12:52 AM
435

Sandra knows what’s up. I am HERE for Sandra’s energy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 01:02 PM
6

I see no differences here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 12:48 PM
51

Yep, but one day the wrong man will receive unsolicited dick pics and then there will be an uproar.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 11:29 AM
3

HER CHANNEL GIVES ME LIFE 😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 10:39 AM
109

Laws evolve over time. With the rise of hookup apps and public outcry it will eventually become law. Such a slow process though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 10:24 AM
586

Flashing is a sex offence. There is no reason why cyber flashing cannot be classed as a sex offence as well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 10:02 AM
129

This is adorable. I love loving gestures. Heck, I love seeing love!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 12:24 AM
15

Yet L/Z/NVM rate women on an arbitrary scale and somehow that isn’t considered dehumanising??? At least Low/Zero/Negative is based on assessing intrinsic values, self-respect, and general character. Their messed up rating system is based on whether we look enough like a plastic fuckdoll. We also apply our assessment on women as well. Women are not immune from being L/Z/NVW!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 10:48 AM
109

I hate it when people try to come at nail extensions as if having them somehow makes you less of a person because it’s not natural?! Umm no, natural nails aren’t that strong at long lengths so I’m gonna keep looking fine with my high maintenance nails thanks!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 04:49 AM
15

No one is hating women here, sis. We’re just not coddling fragile egos or enabling dangerous behaviours. Your post reeks of tone policing women, and that in itself is deeply problematic. Also be mindful that we don’t all belong to the same cultural group. In my culture we speak directly and honestly, and do not coddle egos. Doing otherwise is seen as foolish and dim-witted behaviour. This sub teaches women to take responsibility for themselves and not constantly victimise ourselves. We are not r…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 12:05 AM
15

Use a vibe on your clit while he’s working that PIV, you’ll get the most intense vaginal orgasms. I need clitoral stimulation to orgasm during PIV (unless he’s spent a good while making me come and I’m super sensitive), and it’s earth shattering when I do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 10:59 PM
155

Male entitlement has existed forever. They genuinely think they are entitled to all women’s bodies and servitude because the entirety of existence has socialised them to believe so. Always remember that porn is only a symptom of the problem (albeit a major one). Female degradation, exploitation, and objectification has existed forever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 10:41 PM
51

Dating a L/NVM is not just like having to do a job, but also being the one who signs the pay cheque. You are paying for your own abuse. Hard pass from me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 02:17 AM
9

No one has ever called a man a king on this sub for quitting porn, sis. It’s always considered the bare minimum. We’re generally ruthless towards guys (so we should be!) and the men who step up to try to meet our standards are the men who can stick around in our lives. Our attitude is usually “well done dude you realised that getting off to exploited and degraded women is disgusting, oh wait but did you actually?” Since usually the guy is only quitting for the fact that it affected his ability t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 01:59 AM
157

Ngl this is just straight up erotica.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/21 05:49 PM
91

Not showering combined with not changing the sheets I would guess? This is so gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/21 12:14 PM
66

Spot on. Our patriarchal society loves to demonise women and girls for everything they do, while coddling fragile male egos and painting every male misdeed as an innocent mistake.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/21 06:57 AM
116

People have deluded themselves into thinking rearing children is easy because that’s what we have been socialised to believe. These are the people who don’t actively parent their children. They just reproduce and make zero effort in raising their child. Raising a decent human being is very difficult. Making sure to draw reasonable boundaries, being firm but fair, nurturing and supporting their growth and eventual independence, it’s all a tough balancing act! Any parent worth their salt will admi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/21 01:42 AM
135

I love this strategy, I do the same thing more or less. I usually then follow up with something along the lines of “you wouldn’t buy a car without an insurance policy, having a kid without marriage is just a recipe for disaster!” Triggers the PickMe’s so deeply.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 10:44 AM
21

I agree with this wholeheartedly. This seems more so about poor self-esteem and needing validation from strangers. Men like this aren’t usually admired, people are polite for sure, but they’re low key pitying the guy because he has to brag so much. Anyone with half a brain can see how LV that behaviour is. Not just in regards to dating, but it’s poor social manner. I make sure to keep my personal info to myself as a vetting strategy. If a guy is actively interested in me, he will ask questions a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 10:46 PM
59

You’re not alone. I was terrified that if he found out he was being recorded he would get violent. A lot of the time these guys do get violent once they’re outed. Having supportive friends/family around likely helps reduce the risk of violence because these narcissists won’t show their true colours to anyone but the victim.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 01:53 AM
18

I’ve never binned a book until that piece of trash. I literally threw it in the bin. It did not deserve to be donated and reused. So unbelievably gratuitous, it was sick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 10:42 PM
21

Then count your blessings!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 10:39 AM
12

It is hard to unlearn behaviours we’ve been socialised to resort to as women, but I promise you it gets easier. Devour all the readings, valuable posts, and recommended books. Invest in yourself, you are so much more worth your time than any scrote who wasted it. Every day that you choose yourself shows that you are truly trying to learn from this experience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 10:33 AM
274

Most guys outside of the internet in actual real life will admit how toxic and destructive porn is, both to women and themselves. Still doesn’t stop majority of them using it though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 10:17 AM
37

I am so proud of you. Love seeing wholesome posts like this. Anytime he crosses your mind, remind yourself, if he wanted to do right by you, he would have. He chose not to, so you gotta keep choosing yourself sis!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 10:13 AM
81

Fantastic post. We all need a reminder sometimes that we can’t save everyone. We are responsible for ourselves, we cannot control the decisions of others. As sad as it is, sometimes people have to learn the hard way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 07:01 AM
2

It’s messed up how people can deny that porn addiction is real when you look at all these women’s stories and it’s like reading your own experiences back to yourself. Really validating though, knowing that what we went through was real and we weren’t imagining it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 12:47 AM
18

Agreed. Entertaining a guy who speaks that aggressively at all is just a waste of time and energy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 10:47 PM
36

I appreciated her message until I found out she has an onlyfans account. Any woman who supports that platform by creating an account is (either directly or indirectly) contributing to the exploitation and degradation of women. It’s a no from me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 05:56 AM
9

Wasn’t there a mod post a while back that was about these types of posts not being helpful to the sub and shouldn’t be put up anymore? Edit: this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 05:22 AM
134

Could you imagine if every woman sued their toxic ex for the PTSD she developed as a result of his abuse? Men would quit porn and anything that enables their problem treatment of women because men around the world would go broke from what they’ve put women through. As if that would happen though. No surprises if the justice system holds up a mans ability to sue a woman over something like this, but any woman who tries would be shut down in an instant.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 05:07 AM
131

Have hope sisters, just keep choosing guys that look like this and don’t be intimidated if he looks after his body. Weak scrotes like the terminally online and pornsick will eventually phase themselves out because of their poor diets and lifestyles, and physically superior men will prevail!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 05:01 AM
8

In this case, I was referring more so to men being groomed and sexually abused as children, e.g. being exposed to porn by older male children/family/friends, being coerced into sexual situations by older children, and other situations that is essentially child sexual abuse. When untreated this all leads to hypersexualised behaviour which includes porn/sex addiction. A lot of young boys don’t realise that what they experienced is sexual abuse because the culture of toxic masculinity has made it s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 03:09 AM
5

I’m glad to hear that you walked immediately. Took me a few attempts before it finally ended 🤡. I’m talking from my experience in my comment too. It was terrible, and he still somehow denied/lied/made excuses about everything I was uncovering until he finally ran out of bullshit excuses. My clown self was clearly trying to delude myself into thinking it wasn’t real, so I kept digging, like I’d uncover something that says oh this is all a dream, you can feel better now. I felt so lost and devasta…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 02:57 AM
10

Damn girl, are you me? Did I black out and post this? Agree 100%! I’ve lived my life like this since I legally could and I have never been more at peace with my choices. It involved cutting a lot of toxic family out too, which was sad but ultimately so worth it. No one is worth compromising your mental health.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 03:24 PM
12

This is actually really wholesome. I love hearing about sweet relationship stories, sometimes the negative stuff can be really disheartening. I’m a sucker for romance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 03:16 PM
8

Does he have an identical twin? Send him my way! 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 02:48 PM
142

Desensitisation and general indifference towards violence and disrespect against women Lack of empathy and shame, callousness Inability to develop a warm and intimate connection without sexualising it Quick to anger, unreasonable and instant shifts between hot and cold Need for constant stimulation/proneness to boredom Pathological lying (about everything, even dumb small stuff), highly manipulative and deceptive Secretive and suspicious behaviours, stories don’t add up Many short term relations…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 02:30 PM
47

Nah sis, haven’t you heard about free range farm to table porn? Made from 100% locally grown ingredients, no added nasties! BAHAHAHA ethically sourced MY ASS!!! You are absolutely spot on, “ethical porn” is an oxymoron.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 02:16 PM
91

Sis, what you uncovered is the tip of the iceberg. Mentally prepare yourself for the horrors you’re about to uncover, whatever you imagine, it’s likely worse. Please remember that if he has lied about this, you have no idea what else he has lied about. He will always lie to you because he is comfortable treating you that way. He will not change for you. Listen to your gut. TRUST your instincts. Be better to yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 02:00 PM
198

She’s trying to do whatever it takes to get attention so she finally gets picked. Tbh I think most guys who see this would think it’s desperate and pathetic. Won’t stop them from using her though!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 09:01 AM
40

I agree. I am childfree and my understanding of childfree was you do not want, nor will ever want, children. Redefining “childfree” will absolutely undermine its original meaning.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 05:07 AM
74

My husband punches me as a way of expressing his love, but it’s really painful and I’ve been hospitalised a few times hahaha, I’m not sure if I like it? I know, I’m so vanilla! LOL! How can I gently tell him that I’d like him to maybe reduce the amount of daily punches without upsetting him? He has told me he will cheat on me and quit his job if I ever ask for anything so I don’t want to come across as a demanding bitch!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 02:39 AM
25

You’re definitely not alone, it’s really creepy and disconcerting. It’s painted as “empowering”, but how in the hell is an inanimate object of a female body part not problematic af?! Mmm I feel so ready to take down the patriarchy after drinking my coffee out of an ass! No, your planters and mugs are not “feminist” for LITERALLY objectifying female bodies (here’s looking at you ASOS).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 01:08 PM
61

I think your “friend” needs to be nexted as well as the guy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 11:24 AM
83

His post is likely gratuitous. A lot of these types love the reactions they get and get off to it, it’s sick. There’s only one solution to his problem, hopefully he figures it out. Heck, he might even get off on it! 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 11:20 AM
83

This is absolutely true. I found that since being non-negotiable with my standards and boundaries I only attract the type of energy I want in my life. My friends are likeminded strong women with high standards, and we just repel pick me’s. I also agree that pick me’s tend to try and neg us in attempt to bring us down to their level. I refuse to engage in this unproductive behaviour. If I hear some pick me martyr-type try to neg me for having self-respect, I’ll usually make a smartass comment lik…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 11:08 AM
0

Encouraging personal responsibility is not misogynistic. Misogyny is rooted in hatred of women. My comments are not rooted in hatred, they are encouraging you to be accountable. The rapist is an objectively shitty human, that goes without saying. But you also made choices, unless someone held a gun to your head to respond to his contact, and you were dragged out of your house? Take some responsibility for yourself. Read the mod post. No one is blaming you, we’re just not pandering to you either.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 10:53 AM
0

It’s not victim blaming, it’s encouraging accountability for your own choices too. Yes, he is responsible for what he did to you. But we have all been in a similar position to you before, all we can realistically do is reflect on how we got into that situation and make sure we listen to our instincts when we see the red flags.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 10:35 AM
0

Please read this mod post. The person who wrote the comment you’re responding to is not blaming you, but encouraging you to learn to be responsible for your choices too. Clearly you were not in a good headspace if you went along with a guy like this, there are always red flags. She is simply saying that you should trust yourself, don’t dismiss the red flags when your body is sending signals to see them. I’m sorry this happened to you, I hope you’re doing well now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 10:17 AM
4

I agree with you wholeheartedly. You are not victim blaming, you are telling OP that she disregarded what her gut instinct was telling her. It is absolutely terrible that he raped her, but we are also responsible for ourselves, there was a serious lack of healthy boundary setting and also just plain old common sense. A mod made a post about oversharing of trauma stories and for some reason these posts still make it. What’s frustrating is the downvoting of common sense responses and the enabling …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 10:10 AM
66

I’ve got secondhand embarrassment for the essay she wrote to him. Ladies, block and delete! Don’t waste your energy on these scrotes!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 09:52 AM
99

Needs money and has no self-respect.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 01:47 PM
115

Hahaha thank you for the eye bleach! I see reminders of men ageing like milk daily. The bar needs a search party, it’s that low.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 01:42 PM
729

This should be tagged Not Safe For Life. I cannot unsee this. That is enough internet for the day. 🙃
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 01:30 PM
30

Not taking anyone’s word, just my own opinion that it is rude to be on your phone when doing an activity with someone. My friends and I have a no phones rule when we’re catching up, spending time together. It isn’t unusual to think it’s rude. She was likely uninterested and was probably just humouring him, but if that is the case then she should not be in a relationship with someone that she doesn’t enjoy doing mutual activities with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 01:26 PM
43

It simply comes down to the fact that having sex with an actual woman is too much effort because he is expected to make her orgasm and enjoy herself too. He would rather gratify himself to exploited women that solely exist to serve men. Porn has conditioned men to view sex as a chore if it involves pleasuring women. They will participate in sex if it only involves using a woman’s body as a tool to masturbate themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 12:25 PM
217

He’s developed a gambling problem. It’s an investment when you’re financially stable and have spare money to be able to take risks. If you’re struggling and barely able to make ends meet, you need to prioritise your living expenses, otherwise it’s just gambling. The relationship is not going to work.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 02:19 AM
46

Scrotes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 12:15 AM
3

Depends. I work in a professional environment, the fragile egos that need to be coddled isn’t uniquely a female issue, definitely not gendered at all. There are definitely strong assertive women in the workplace (I work with mostly incredible assertive women), but fragility will stand out to strong (or opportunistic narc) people. If your acquaintance still has some pick me tendencies then the women with fragile egos will stand out more because she’s still pandering to men/thinks she’s “one of th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 10:46 AM
94

Of course they know, and they won’t make any effort to change it because it benefits them. Instead they’ll keep conditioning pick me’s to delude themselves into thinking men are the victims so they can relentlessly defend men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 10:12 AM
39

His actions and words will be enough to turn you off him once you take the rose tinted glasses off. We’ve all been there, so don’t stress it, it’s totally human to think someone is hot. But once they’ve shown you what kind of a person they are, you need to stop making excuses for them/giving benefit of the doubt. That kind of behaviour in women is what puts them in dangerous situations, excusing shitty male behaviour can be life-threatening. When in doubt, always go back to the handbook or look …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 03:22 AM
89

Here is a handy link to a post from the handbook. It discusses how unhelpful crushes are for your progress. If he was interested in you, he would make the effort.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 03:10 AM
-14

This seems really unhealthy to enable women to wallow in negativity. I’d like to reframe the question. Ladies, besides the obvious dropping of deadweight partners who brought you down, what helped you thrive on your level up journey? Edit: a mod made a post which is helpful in clarifying what I mean when I say enabling behaviour.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 02:25 AM
42

100% it’s depraved creeps using random women’s photos to lure these idiots in!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 02:35 PM
148

He’s probably fallen for some scam online and thinks he’s made a legitimate connection 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 02:31 PM
97

Name and shame the institution and the teacher! These men get away time after time with this disgusting behaviour, they need to see that there are consequences to their horrific words that incite harm to women. Freedom of speech does not equal freedom from consequence. Send this video to your local news outlet, do what you can to make it known that a rapist is grooming and enabling harmful attitudes in young men towards women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 05:42 AM
200

Forget Reddit, the entire internet will spin this in a way that blames women and defends rapists, e.g. “we don’t know the whole context of the discussion”, and other garbage excuses defending these rapists.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 05:33 AM
93

Pitting women against each other is a way to divide and conquer them. Some women are aware of this and some are waking up to it. The remaining pick mes who throw other women under the bus for male validation, here’s hoping they come round.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 01:23 AM
120

Absolutely. It’s power trippers who are too unstable to even become a cop. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve met the odd decent guy but usually he had a plan to not stay long term, eg. side gig, studying, shift work helped with his lifestyle at the time. Tbh though those men are few and far between.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 03:24 AM
3

I think you missed the point. It’s about oversharing trauma. Trauma is something therapy is essential for. I understand that talking to women who’ve gone through similar situations is validating, but this is not the place for it. There are plenty of trauma support groups and forums out there. This is ultimately a dating sub, for when your trauma is appropriately managed and you’re in a healthy headspace to get back out there and vet ruthlessly. It is possible to share the feelings you went throu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 02:09 AM
28

100%! The US will have the most amazing female candidate and they’d vote in a bag of chips over her if they could.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 01:15 AM
459

Prison officers. Most those guys didn’t pass the psych test to become a cop, so that’s saying something.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 01:11 AM
15

Girl, you planning the next assassination?! Jk your comment is somewhat suspicious though 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 01:08 AM
18

Absolutely. My frustration lies with those who know better, the professional victims who are addicted to their own misery. I enjoy living a life filled with peace and joy, no room for toxicity!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 02:59 PM
43

I love it when we’re called “heartless” for having boundaries. How terrible we must be for wanting the best for the people we care about! Venting a few times to friends and then making changes is one thing, but using them for free counselling and then still committing to being a martyr is just insane. I have cut off so many pick me friends for the same reasons, they have exhausted my empathy reserves. I cannot tolerate being around self-sabotaging behaviour.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 02:24 PM
114

PREACH! Reading this felt so validating. I love this sub but it gets so exhausting seeing pick me horror stories and unhelpful posts from users who are clearly not actually here for FDS. I can only imagine how much worse it is for the mods, especially with the posts that don’t make it! They don’t care to read the handbook and they don’t respect community rules. They just come here to unload their trauma and do nothing to change their situation. The worst part is that quality posts end up getting…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 02:06 PM
37

I second that shame needs to make a return. I miss the concept of shame. We need to make shame a thing again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 01:45 AM
56

She’s thrown away friendships over him. She does not seem to be able to maintain a healthy balance of her own relationships, goals, and interests with having a boyfriend. It takes two people to maintain a relationship. You have tried your best to sustain a relationship with her that she is putting zero effort into. If you keep going it will burn you out. Friends like this are not good for your mental health, everything is always about them and there is no fair balance in the relationship. Friend…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 05:50 AM
292

This is honestly the best advice ever. It’s applicable to any relationship context: colleagues, friends, family, partner. Set and enforce boundaries, recognise who respects them, appreciate those who do, and distance yourself from those who don’t.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 05:04 AM
30

In my experience my NVX was either trawling through porn/hookup apps/sites, playing videogames, and/or doing drugs. He put an insane amount of time into it too. He was also taking days off work to do all this, which was hugely concerning. Of course, I learned all this after the fact because I trusted that he was a good man to me. 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 01:45 AM
53

I second this. GOT is a creepy old white dudes child rape fantasy. It’s just so gratuitous. Any story that has themes of exploiting and degrading women, for no valid reason but to entertain, needs to go back to the drawing board and start again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 01:34 AM
14

Girl, I got big tits too. All tits are sexualised by men, regardless of size. This is a vid made for social media, everything she is doing on cam is 100% on purpose.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 10:10 AM
15

Good. Women have been tone policed and forced to tiptoe around fragile egos for far too long. I refuse to coddle anyone. FDS is known for its tough love approach, women come here to challenge themselves and unlearn their pick me behaviours.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 07:49 AM
23

Calling performative femininity out for what it is is not misogynistic. Misogyny is based on hatred of women. My comment is not rooted in hating women, it’s challenging women to question their choices. Don’t ever police your tone or feel bad for daring to think critically.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 07:38 AM
10

Right?! Yikes1000000
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 05:09 AM
44

You can enjoy makeup etc. I do too! Just important to acknowledge the root of it is performative femininity, which originally was to please hetero men. I don’t lie to myself and claim to feel empowered by makeup anymore. Especially when big cosmetic literally creates insecurities for women to buy a bullshit product, or get surgery to “fix” the nonexistent problem (see: labiaplasty). This isn’t the place to discuss it though, the mods have posted about it because users can get into heated debates…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 04:54 AM
7

Spot on. This isn’t just exclusive to geek culture though. It’s men who want a harem around them. All the options, all the exposed vulnerabilities that he can take advantage of whenever he wants.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 01:12 AM
6

I love this! I relate to it so deeply, and I think there’s too many women who do. What’s most important is her realisation that she deserves better, that Queen energy is just incredible!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 12:58 AM
6

💦😍💦
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 12:10 AM
31

To be fair it’s annoying af, not sure about it being a deal breaker though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 12:04 AM
394

Watching men putting other men in their place is a pastime I live for. When a clearly superior man emasculates a weak pathetic scrote, I’m there mentally filming it to look back on the days I need a laugh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 01:33 PM
124

Hahaha excellent idea. Tbh though, I don’t mind if a guy did write it, as long as the message gets out and women stop accepting abuse and raise their standards. The double standard should be acknowledged though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 01:24 PM
226

Spot on. It’s a negging tactic NVM use. If her self-esteem is low enough and she’s been sufficiently groomed and manipulated by him, she’s more likely to submit to his demands, e.g. for her to get plastic surgery and other changes in her appearance. Plot twist (really not though), she will do whatever he asks and he will get bored of how vapid she has become or how low her self-esteem is and how easily she does as she’s told, and he will STILL cheat on her/drop her for his next victim.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 12:31 PM
211

Ding ding ding, we have a winner!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 12:22 PM
398

It frustrates me that if a woman wrote that response, she would be threatened/abused/belittled, but a guy writes it and he gets a standing ovation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 11:37 AM
4

The scrote anthem.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 03:05 AM
73

She knows there are serious concerns, but she doesn’t want to have to come to terms with it. It’s like when women hide or minimise the abuse they’re going through, ashamed to admit to friends and family because then it makes it all too real. LEAVE HIM SIS!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 02:20 AM
6

This is the best karma for pornsick scrotes!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 01:02 AM
14

Hahahah 3 minutes? My NVX needed me to be a completely lifeless human fuckdoll if he wanted to last that long! If I moved, he was done in less than a minute. Ah, how I do not miss sex with a pornsick scrote.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 12:56 AM
11

Asking us to “ease” is tone policing women. We are talking about our experiences. No one said your religion is not valid. And no one is “choosing to see it from the perspective of Muslim men”. These women were abused. They did not choose that. Learn to accept critical thinking in your life. It’s upsetting to you because we’re not neoliberals pandering to you to prevent being perceived as Islamophobic. We are calling out the deeply toxic aspects of Islam.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 12:45 AM
13

Nah sis, it’s us middle-easterners/non-practicing Muslims who are calling out the misogyny in our own lives. She’s clearly tired of being put through hell and having a vent. That’s not an attack, that’s a lived experience. It’s not to alienate our sisters, but to shame the men who seek to silence us. You cannot deny how deeply sexist and oppressive much of our heritage is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 12:34 AM
11

This is a solid point. It all pretty much boils down to having genuine empathy for others.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 02:56 PM
25

He wasn’t self-respecting then. Self-respect involves having honour. If he had those double standards, he was incapable of treating others with fairness and dignity because deep down he was insecure and spineless. I stand by my comment, no self-respecting person walks all over boundaries.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 02:44 PM
113

The bar needs a search party, it’s that low.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 02:36 PM
3

Weird fantasy, but okay.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 02:33 PM
110

At one point, I seriously felt like I needed a stenographer to document conversations with my NV ex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 09:44 AM
72

This is depressingly true. You will walk into seeing them balls deep in some pick me, and they will still attempt to gaslight you and claim it’s not what it seems.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 09:37 AM
143

This is spot on. No self-respecting person will come at you for having boundaries. If anything, they respect you more for not tolerating less than you deserve.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 09:31 AM
52

I find it’s always libfems calling it racist, but they shut down hard when it’s us non-practicing Muslim women critiquing Islam, calling out the blatant sexism. Their little brains explode because Islamophobia trumps all in their woke olympics so they sit there and seethe. I love it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 01:49 AM
17

It sounds like he’s about to threaten you 😅
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/21 12:28 PM
21

Also if you want to vet a guy for how much he’s willing to spend, pick a fancy coffee house or patisserie and see how he reacts. So not only are you settling for less than the bare minimum, you are picking the location? Sis, that is not a date. It also is not FDS. A date should be fun and something to look forward to. If you’re feeling this way about dating, making it sound like a chore, maybe take a break from it. This attitude is not the way to go about it. FDS advocates for being ruthless wit…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/21 09:06 AM
249

I used to think bold romantic gestures in the early stages of courting was a good sign. My former clown self didn’t recognise the signs of love bombing at the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/21 07:37 AM
283

Awww welcome! Get comfy and get reading! This sub is excellent because it encourages introspection and growth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/21 01:34 AM
1

Reading this genuinely made me smile. I really hope you keep doing what’s best for you. Looking up people who bring us down will only make us feel worse. Keep focusing on your own level up journey ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/21 01:08 AM
13

It’s not your job to change people. They are responsible for themselves. Trying to change someone else will only lead to burnout, don’t drain yourself on someone who doesn’t want your help. Focus on your own level up journey. The right people will stick around.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/21 01:04 AM
2

He is posting on social media for random strangers to stroke his ego. Or to potentially reel you back in. Or both. If he was actually sorry he would have done right by you. The best apology is behaviour change. Did he catch on immediately that he did something that upset you and made sure not to do that again? No? Exactly, he’s your ex for a reason. Stop self-sabotaging and looking at his social media. Block, delete, head high, focus on your level up journey. Any time you miss him or think of hi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/21 11:30 AM
5

I feel like too elaborate starts bordering on love bombing. I love a good old fashioned elegant dinner date that shows he has put thought into what cuisine and dining style I like.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/21 06:06 AM
121

Women are not rehabilitation centres for broken men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 07:49 AM
29

It’s actually a psychological thriller about one woman’s struggle with her dissociative identity disorder.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 05:03 AM
27

I love being called cold and hard to read, it’s how a scrote outs himself. I intend to come across that way because he’s clearly not deserving of my warmth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 02:55 AM
105

My bad! I think my brain just checked out hard when I read the same pick me crap and couldn’t take it anymore. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 12:16 AM
-7

Did she get picked?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 12:13 AM
54

She is also a chump for enabling his shitty behaviour. This is a lose-lose situation. She needs to bail, he is way too used to treating her like a doormat and will never change. The reality of a good relationship is never acting like a doormat in the first place. If you change halfway men are too used to the former you and won’t change with you. They’ll keep walking all over your boundaries until you open your eyes to his scrotery and walk out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 12:06 AM
58

So a few days ago at work, I was talking with a new coworker. She made an offhand remark that aligned with radfem theory. I looked at her like she was a unicorn. And then we started whispering like mad, that our space as women was being erased, and that the fact that we were whispering was proof in itself that existing as a woman has become deeply political and society rejects free thinkers. But we were so excited to have found a new friend in each other. There are women out there, tired of this…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 11:59 PM
85

Agreed! Most these deadbeat single dads just want another woman to palm the kid off onto. It’s actually terrifying that they are unconcerned about the child’s safety, they’ll give it to anyone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 11:42 PM
57

These days with cardless cash at ATMs, being able to add your card to your phone, I’d just say I’m sure you can work something out with the restaurant and walk out. Of his life. Forever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 11:40 PM
26

I completely agree. Even negative publicity is still publicity. Tired of seeing this scrote energy all over the sub. Anything like this should not be permitted to be posted, it’s not useful to women!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 11:37 PM
18

The penis or the hand? Hopefully both! A girl can dream.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 11:26 PM
168

Absolutely. It is so emasculating and weak when men behave like this. Then they wonder why their wives aren’t interested in sex. No buddy, she’s not interested in sex with you. A hot strong man, fixing and making useful stuff around the house, proving he is a capable protector and provider, his bones will be jumped daily!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 11:25 PM
34

That is the greenest of flags. So many men become defensive and aggressive when you give them your honest constructive criticism. They shift blame and make excuses constantly, never accountable for their own actions! So when he accepts feedback graciously and actively takes it on board, showing it in his actions, it is definitely a positive sign of a decent moral character.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 11:19 PM
31

His hand has developed arthritis, it yearns for a merciful end.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 11:05 PM
413

I hope this woman feels proud of her son, doing a big boy chore like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 11:02 PM
13

Same here! I am with you 100%, I’ve lost interest in it for the exact same reasons. This is the problem with a lot of books/TV in general. They’re made to only appeal to men. It’s lazy writing, just turning everything into softcore porn and alienating half of their audience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 10:56 PM
9

100%! I liked it back in my teens but grew out of it. Don’t have patience for Mary Sue characters, I know better than to watch crap now. Same with much of tv in general. Fullmetal is actually a fave of mine. Such an incredible story!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 12:59 PM
57

Yep! Avoid weebs like the plague! That shit is perverted and immature. I’m so over anime because of creeps ruining it all for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 09:27 AM
2

Agreed. These posts do not bring any value to the sub. OP you wasted energy on a scrote already, don’t waste even more energy giving them another platform. Real power is not even caring about his existence. Block and delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 07:01 AM
23

Let’s be real, he probably wouldn’t go to jail. He’ll get away with it a million times until he kills someone, and then the justice system will be like “oh wow didn’t see that coming”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 02:33 AM
4

Yeah I’m good for not having known that it was a thing. I avoid the rest of Reddit because of shit like that!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 11:41 PM
12

Sis, it’s your body and your choice, but that blood is natural and meant to happen. Stopping it couldn’t be good. But you know your body. Do what’s best for you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 11:39 PM
89

I agree with this 100%! I genuinely cannot become aroused by a pornsick, videogame addict loser, even if I tried. They have so successfully emasculated themselves to me that all I see is a spineless cretin. Even if the guy is physically attractive but he is not hardworking, passionate, and respectful towards women, my brain just nopes out. My brain needs to see a strong, capable man that can protect and provide. So many of these scrotes think their girlfriends/wives don’t have sexual urges, but …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 02:09 PM
55

I laughed so hard reading “not safe for life”. That needs to be a flair 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 01:46 PM
115

That argument is so easily shut down with how “playing out” a twisted fantasy only enables the behaviour, leads to desensitisation and intensifies the desire for the real thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 01:38 PM
70

What is it with pick me’s thinking a guy is “kinky”, making excuses for him, when his literal fantasy is extreme violence, rape, and murder. She seriously doesn’t get that he doesn’t see it the way she does. Little miss pick me will keep justifying and defending his behaviour until she finally becomes a victim of his abuse outside of sex and suddenly the fog will clear. This clown has no problem with him exploiting and abusing other women until this point?! She sounds so traumatised that the lev…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 01:31 PM
29

Some of those PickMe women you’re describing are the vulnerable single mothers that predators take advantage of. They have been deprived of healthy attention from men, so when they get some form of male validation, they’re slowly groomed and manipulated. Sometimes they might not believe their children immediately when abuse is disclosed. They are typically victims of abuse as well, so those red flags may not be obvious to them, but it is to the kids. Too many women stick by these violent and abu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 08:38 AM
288

I boycotted birth control a while ago and it was the best thing I ever did. It seriously clouded my judgement and made me feel so emotionally dead. If a man wants me, he can go get the snip!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 06:02 AM
37

Good! Be scared because then your standards will stay high and you will vet ruthlessly when you do date. Fear is an emotion that we take for granted, fear is so important! Single mothers are vulnerable and used to shitty male behaviour, so they are an easy target for predators to manipulate, groom, and take advantage of. FDS principles are so important for all women to be wary of all kinds of men, even the sociopathic kind. So as long as you apply these principles to your life and don’t let your…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 05:41 AM
85

THIS IS SO IMPORTANT. Time for a rant. I don’t care how “nice” he seems, ladies, please please please be hyper-vigilant of men who go out of their way to be close to children. Especially men who specifically look to date single mothers. I won’t go into detail about my personal info but I work in the field of forensic behaviour. I have seen all sorts of predatory behaviour time and time again. The rate of predatory behaviour is so high of men interested in single mothers especially, and they play…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 04:08 AM
20

I seriously thought this too! Cheating red flag right there. This guy is definitely in a relationship and saw his gf out so decided to bail.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 12:35 AM
5

The podcast episode with the childcare worker made some great points. Definitely deserves a listen!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 11:31 AM
101

Can she appeal?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 09:34 AM
53

My comment was definitely not intending to take a shot at women married or with children. I understand that it may come across dismissing them. I meant more when women define themselves as an extension of their marriage or children, instead of defining themselves firstly as a unique individual with their own goals and interests. I agree with you 100%, and as a daughter of a single mother who worked her ass off to provide for us, I can confirm how devalued women’s efforts are when raising childre…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 07:07 AM
112

Can confirm, my NVM ex was a few years younger and looked 10 years older. Shitty lifestyle does that to a person. He glowed up after meeting me, developed a skincare routine, started gymming, eating better. He didn’t kick the drug addiction and pornsickness though, despite lies claiming otherwise, so still had a semi-Gollum look to him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 06:34 AM
104

Spot on. Women are socialised to undermine themselves in every aspect of their lives. It’s exhausting when there are women who continue to do this and do not seek to unlearn this behaviour, or worse, deny it’s a problem at all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 04:42 AM
51

He was extremely quiet around my friends and family. I would always have to talk for him or speak up for him. I at first didn’t think this was such an issue, but I realize now it was about controlling me and letting my create the narrative that my friends and family would see. Sometimes, you really do need to take extra caution with the quiet ones. This is so important! I remember I missed this red flag with my NVM ex too. He would never contribute to discussions and when I’d ask later why he di…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 03:55 AM
57

These days women have started fighting back during DV altercations and they’re ending up being the ones with restraining orders put against them, police painting the male partner as a victim with a “crazy” girlfriend or wife. It’s giving these men even more power over her, trapping her completely. This is the justice system universally. I am so tired of it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 03:24 AM
7

Getting a bit frustrated seeing dating related posts on FLUS and women not focusing on the subs purpose, well aware of FDS’ existence but not using it? Just needed a vent 😅
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 03:18 AM
6

Didn’t you know?! It’s the 1600s and we only live to 50 if we’re lucky. The article makes total sense!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 03:15 AM
37

You would love Jane Gilmore’s “fixed it” mission, she goes around retitling sensationalised news headlines that intentionally bring women down.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 01:52 AM
3

First red flag: he’s “intimidated” by you. If he’s not willing to step up and work hard to meet you at your level, he will drag you down to his, ANY way he can.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 01:43 AM
48

This sounds so wholesome, but can you imagine how funny it would be irl? My imagination went wild 😂 You’re both coming home from grocery shopping, his hands are full of bags, you’re about to enter the house and he’s like “wait no stop!”. Proceeds to put all the bags down, pick you up, places you where you want, goes back to collect the bags. Every single time you need to enter the house. Like you need to check the mail? He runs out to bring you in afterwards. It starts to feel like a curse, you …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 01:42 AM
16

Let’s hope in appearance only! 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 01:33 AM
4

He was trying to dim your light, he knew you’re capable but attempted to manipulate and neg you into thinking you aren’t. I’m so glad you dumped that scrote and worked hard for what you wanted. I love seeing the post breakup glow up women go through when they ditch the deadweight!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/21 01:28 AM
103

This is horrible but it still does not surprise me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 10:43 PM
-22

I am an abuse victim. I choose not to give power to my abusers as they have made me feel powerless enough. Don’t let abusers win and overpower you by showing them their attempts to bring you down are working. I choose to laugh at their stupidity. They are so pathetic they went as far to make a meme to grossly generalise about the women they exploit. It’s stupid, and a massive generalisation. But I know some women who continue to victimise themselves, not doing anything to better their situation,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 12:27 PM
11

It’s crazy to see what my NVM ex’s future looks like. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 11:39 AM
83

Well yeah, how dare she not seek the approval from her 4 minute month boyfriend! How is he supposed to feel like a man when she makes all these decisions for herself?! Now he can’t pretend to bring something to the table!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 11:27 AM
-23

I know this is meant to be offensive and misogynistic, but really, it’s just pathetic and hilarious. And let’s be real. It’s a pretty accurate representation of most libfems 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 10:14 AM
83

This comment needs to be pinned. What you’ve described is EXACTLY the case.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 10:04 AM
257

My girlfriend doesn’t just ruminate and wallow in self-defeat like I do, she just gets shit done. What is wrong with her?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 10:02 AM
301

This guy has a very poor understanding of what constitutes impulsive behaviour. Her decisions sound like thoroughly planned out life goals. He clearly hasn’t attempted to get to know her since this is striking him as “impulsive” decisions. If you know your partner, you know their goals and aspirations. You can’t just buy a house on a whim. That shit is slow, and takes effort. Same with a damn grad degree. He has this incredible high achieving girlfriend, and instead of celebrating her wins, he h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 09:59 AM
97

This is gold. I absolutely hate that prostitution is referred to as “sex work”. Sex is consensual and incredible, it is not work. Prostitution, however, is exploitative, degrading, and much of the time, not consensual.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 09:09 AM
83

It’s really cool that you own a stallion! Just thought I’d chime in to say that ☺️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 02:23 PM
33

Can confirm, all James’ are fuckboys. But damn it’s such a hot white guy name, I’ve yet to meet a physically unattractive James 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 02:20 PM
42

Don’t hate on us nude sleepers, it’s just so comfortable! Old scrotey stank though, hate your heart out!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 02:15 PM
5

Spend more time with your friends or family (if you’re close). You might just be missing the social aspect and connection from positive relationships. When you feel something, try figure out the root of it. That helps me out, hope it helps you too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 12:40 PM
16

Every guy I have ever directly stated this to agreed 100%. They know. THEY KNOW. Yet will still walk all over pick me women if they get the chance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 10:21 AM
8

It looks like it’s made for teenagers as the target audience so the message is probably less nuanced for a more mature audience. (Maturity as in emotional intelligence, not age). Maybe that’s why? Thoughts?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 10:18 AM
91

The C section one broke my heart but still didn’t surprise me. The bar is so damn low that I don’t know if they’ll ever find it again to bring it back up. At this stage we need an entire mining crew to start searching for it. Not even a crew, like an entire organisation dedicated to it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 10:11 AM
59

OMG WTF How did you not run for the hills when you saw that?! I’m so glad you’re not with piss bottle scrote anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 10:07 AM
17

Not sure I agree with this. Radical feminism is a pretty big advocate of taking responsibility and being accountable to benefit your community. I’d say it lines up with Marxist theory. Liberal feminism is individualistic and definitely encourages victimisation and lack of personal responsibility. Neoliberalism is essentially that though, absolutely zero personal responsibility and 100% being a victim. Everyone else is to blame for my lack of action to improve my situation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 09:50 AM
48

Thank you for calling this shit out. It saddens me that we have people here who think these social media scams are legit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 09:30 AM
11

This is definitely a shitpost to stir subs like this up. These dropkicks post controversial shit all the time because they love getting a reaction.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 09:27 AM
3

If she has to post her life up on social media and relies on external validation from internet strangers, is she really happy with herself? Who knows. You never will, and that’s okay. You’re bizarrely self-sabotaging by looking at the carefully controlled highlight reel of someone you don’t like. That’s like taking a swig from a bottle of poison knowing full well it will make you sick, but hoping somehow it won’t???? I’m very much so on the cut all social media wagon, as I prefer the people who …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 07:22 AM
3

Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 03:25 AM
5

What show of hers is this from? I’d like to watch it ☺️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 03:23 AM
28

This is an incredible post, thank you for taking the time. I’ve saved it to reread when I need to as well. Side note: seeing some nasty comments here towards you, please do not ever stop being your authentic self, don’t ever let anyone dim your light. You are one of the “tough love” posters here and everything you post is true, even if people don’t want to admit it. I appreciate your posts a lot, keep ‘em coming sis. Instead of wallowing about how shitty men are, you always make solid points wit…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 03:01 AM
3

Those solid strategy posts exist but you have to trawl through numerous stupid screenshots to find them. It is possible to talk about problem behaviour to be mindful of, without seeing trashy screenshots. There are so many excellent posts on matters like this. I love that the mods have implemented a new feature that is strategy highlights of the week. It helps give a platform to the posts that got lost in a sea of shit like this post.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 02:18 AM
0

That and also women who fail to follow the sub rules and think this is a space to wallow in their own self pity, or just ruminate about shitty male behaviour. We get it, shit men exist, but trawling through their shit subs and seeing what they’re posting is so sad. Like why would you screenshot this? Why would you then post it?! It’s just a waste of energy that cultivates more negative energy. Why not post a wholesome post that uplifts women?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 02:14 AM
108

This is incredibly wholesome! Absolutely refreshing to see after seeing pointless trashy posts about NV behaviour. Thank you for putting this up ☺️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 02:09 AM
9

We know this scrotery exists. For the love of all that is good please stop posting this kind of trash to FDS. The mods wrote about this, is it really necessary to inundate the sub with trashy screencaps of NV behaviour. We all know this exists, no need to give it any more of a platform! I cannot imagine how exhausting it is to moderate this sub and redirect users constantly to content that benefits women. FOCUS ON STRATEGY AND SOLID CONTENT THAT ENCOURAGES GROWTH. READ THE DAMN HANDBOOK BEFORE P…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 02:04 AM
1

I just imagine you walking around with those HUGE keyrings with a crazy amount of keys like a gaoler in children’s cartoons 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 12:00 AM
7

Women can’t do anything without a man violating her space, physical or mental.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 11:49 PM
26

Never actually been with a real woman + pornsick desensitisation of senses
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 09:47 PM
47

This is really valuable advice. I’m guilty of running errands with my wallet/keys/phone without a handbag at times, but not going to happen again! I know I put my stuff down sometimes if stopping for a coffee, so that’s just giving a mega creeper an opportunity. It’s so messed up that you had to make a post about this, just another thing women need to be wary of. What a wonderful world we live in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 09:44 PM
205

I know this was meant to be creepy and all but really, that’s the perfect man. He flings his penis in her “general” direction, so if it doesn’t land he still accepts his fate. What a guy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 09:38 PM
26

This response is perfect 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 09:33 PM
5

Completely understandable. It really is a difficult balancing act, being a woman. I feel like you would appreciate a lot of posts by u/penelopekitty She writes a lot of solid content about being mindful of our socialisation as women while dating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 09:46 AM
9

It’s a massive cope. They shit all over other women’s standards because deep down they know they don’t have standards for themselves and instead of doing something to feel better, they’d rather drag you down. It reminds me of the women who insist on being a martyr. Going on about their self-sacrifice, how tired they are, how they do nothing for themselves and everything for their families. But they don’t say it in a wholesome way, they say it snidely as if you somehow don’t care about your loved…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 07:33 AM
290

Women are socialised to internalise their pain, men are socialised to externalise. e.g. a woman criticises every single aspect of herself, internally rips herself apart, while a man gets angry at the world and gets physically and/or emotionally violent.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 06:43 AM
11

Exactly! I find that I’ll always be minding my own business and some LV person gives me their two cents about how I dress/take care of my appearance. I am mindful not to judge others because I don’t know their story, but damn do shitty people looooove to tell you what they think of how you present yourself. It really is always low value people making snide remarks, trying to bring me down when I just enjoy looking after myself because it makes me feel good. And 100% yes! Back in my pick me cool …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 06:37 AM
7

Adding to this, hell yes! Men in AFL have such lean fit bods, although rugby has that mass too which is just UNNNFFFF JUST ALL THE LEAN FIT STRONG MEN 🤤🤤🤤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 02:23 AM
23

Jammies made a post to stop this. I get where you’re coming from, but slow your roll on the standard shaming sis. If sis wants to smooth out some lines that’s her business. You don’t know her story, and she doesn’t owe anyone an explanation for why she does it. Performative femininity or not, we must support and uplift our sisters instead of shaming them for every tiny thing they do. This is how men divide and conquer women, getting into our heads, manipulating and lowering our standards. We’re …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 12:45 AM
82

THIS IS SO ACCURATE! No one with basic self-respect will come at you for looking after yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 12:23 AM
77

Anyone who starts standard shaming me is shut down immediately. I am non-negotiable with my standards, and I love being high maintenance. Most of the time it attracts the type of energy I want around me. I have made incredible friends because of how well I look after myself, and I know that I influence them to take care of themselves too. This is not just in relation to taking pride in our appearance, but nurturing good mental and physical health most of all! I make it a personal mission to upli…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 12:21 AM
24

QUADS OF THE GODS 💦😍💦
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 12:02 AM
29

I hate dudes like that. Trying to be cute and saying she’s a work wife. Nah bro, your actual wife doesn’t stop being your wife when you’re at work! FFS
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/21 11:02 AM
15

Of course they didn’t! If they told you the truth they’d have no future income.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/21 10:58 AM
6

Add pornsick manchild to that and you just described my ex. What lucky women we were to have landed such catches! 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/21 10:55 AM
32

A man wrote that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/21 10:42 AM
112

I used to think this too (back in my pick me days 🙄), but then realised those men don’t see it the way I did. They saw it as me affirming their belief that the entire interaction was transactional. Regardless of how libfems view it, they need to realise that the men they’re defending are not concerned about women’s needs and welfare, and do not perceive dating and relationships the same way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/21 04:23 AM
5

This series is phenomenal, I am loving it! Huge Tolkien fan here. If you ever decide to do a HVM version, can we make requests? i.e. FARAMIR PLEASE! 🥰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 11:45 AM
14

I love assembling furniture, I unintentionally start practicing mindfulness when I do it. Puts me in such a good headspace.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/21 12:20 AM
31

Been there sis. 🙄 I’m fair skin Middle-Eastern and because Middle-Easterners are always assumed to be one big homogenous group that’s apparently meant to be brown skinned, these racist dipshits are all surprise pikachu faced when you disclose your ethnicity. Most the Middle East must have missed the skin colour memo. As others have said, at least the trash took itself out. Keep your head high. 💖
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 02:50 AM
35

This sounds like a fairy tale! So wholesome!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 09:02 AM
5

I used to like this show but I could not tolerate the most recent season! So full of pick me BS! Main character repeatedly tolerates awful sex with no orgasms and is constantly pandering to the males in her life. Also, she has terrible emotional management skills and expects everyone to just go with her flow with zero ability to respectfully express her needs. Seriously did my head in hahahah Her housemate’s relationship is adorbs tho, hopefully that works out!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 08:41 AM
18

This is such a lovely post to read. I hope you both keeping growing and encouraging the best in each other. Hopefully this beautiful relationship becomes a beautiful marriage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 08:36 AM
6

Never heard this but definitely writing it down in my quote journal to look back on later!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 12:50 PM
9

Reading your comment made me feel immensely proud and just warm inside. Women refusing to accept abuse should be the norm. I’m glad you have learned that you’re worth so much more.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 12:46 PM
55

That is such a believable headline, is that an actual one? 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 12:10 PM
178

I’d believe this. JLo definitely knows how to play the game. She’s been in the industry long enough to know what to expect from being in the public eye.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 12:03 PM
46

This is a really helpful comment, I agree with what you’re saying. I also felt that dating advice requests and also people wallowing in their own self pity would leak into FLUS. I think this affected the quality of the space when looking for wholesome content that was about levelling up and self-preservation. Additionally, I feel that there was a huge lack of taking control of ones own life, and forgetting core FDS principles of putting ourselves first. Too many posts complaining about toxic men…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 01:02 AM
2

This exactly! Women’s bodies according to the cosmetic industry are seasonal and trend dependent. Such a load of crap. Our bodies are not a fad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 09:39 AM
26

My personal opinion here, but I legit think that insecurities in women are not a thing until big “beauty” makes it so. The cosmetic industry just randomly manufactures a new “problem” (oddly affecting women only) to brainwash women over time to buy some bullshit product/undergo bullshit surgery to “rectify” the thing that was never a problem in the first place. My twins are big and perky, they’re fab. At one point I legit felt they weren’t big/good enough, heavily considered surgery thanks to th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 07:18 AM
21

A bit of a belly is so different from a beer belly. A beer belly is almost an immediate tell of an unhealthy lifestyle. I’ve never seen a man with a huge distended alcohol induced stomach have any physical definition tbh, so I’m probs just taking the term literally. Also the last part of what you’re saying is exactly what I’m talking about, those guys that claim that make me laugh so hard 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 01:51 PM
29

I’ve only ever heard it refer to overweight men, stemming from when dudes get lazy and fat when their partner is pregnant. AKA “sympathy weight”. LOL, more like proving he was the wrong mating choice. He ain’t keeping anyone safe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 09:35 AM
46

“Muscular with a beer belly” HAHAHAHAHAHA Sis, that ain’t a thing. Don’t let them delude you. Visceral fat is visceral fat. Make your way to fatlogic to see other hilariously bullshit HAES claims get called out. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 09:32 AM
5

Your husband is on the ball!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 08:26 AM
8

💦💦💦
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 08:06 AM
22

The real MVP, right here!!! BRING BACK THE KEANU FLAIR 🤣🤣🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 02:44 AM
29

Eh, this is fun but I take her with a grain of salt. Used to find her funny until she embraced heavy libfem bs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 10:55 PM
-2

Check out this comment. It’s not at all about having to change yourself or your appearance. You can enjoy makeup, I do too, but it’s just important to critically think about why we make certain decisions. It’s important to be aware of the toxic intention behind makeup. That’s it. A lot of people have taken this as a personal attack, it’s not that at all, just a sound observation critically analysing the beauty industry, and encouraging women to recognise how much power male influence actually ha…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 10:49 PM
4

Right?! “Oh you have a different opinion to me? YOU MUST HATE ME AND ARE LITERALLY TRYING TO K*LL ME.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 04:07 PM
3

Legit was think something along these lines. Like you can’t actually comment until you’ve read through the entire handbook posts. Heheh maybe add an exam for the die hard libfems who refuse to engage in nuanced discourse 🤣 Jokes aside though, critical thinking is seriously discouraged by neoliberalism, it’s all about victimising themselves. The left is dead 🙃
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 03:58 PM
12

You’ve pointed out something so niche and obscure. Fair play, I’ll give that to you, never heard of what these categories are! But I think the post is primarily focused on the concept of performative femininity. Also worth noting that much of goth aesthetic also panders to the male gaze.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 03:47 PM
7

If you want to find a man, that’s cool, but FDS isn’t about that. It’s about levelling up and being able to vet the bad from good. Read the handbook. No one is blaming women. Here, I’ll make it easy for you. TL; DR of the post: critically think about why make up makes you feel good. Answer: patriarchal society brainwashing you to believe it makes you happy. You can like it, but don’t delude yourself into thinking it didn’t come from somewhere fucked up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 03:37 PM
15

This is a brilliantly nuanced comment. You have articulated exactly what I’ve felt coming to terms with this as well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 02:37 PM
102

Please don’t romanticise the 90s when the look du jour was diagnosed anorexia. There definitely was an obsession to “fix flaws”, and the perceived flaw was if a woman didn’t look heroin chic. Heroin fucking chic. An era that idolised looking like an actual drug addict. Some of my girlfriends who were teens through the 90s still live with the trauma of what they went through. Yeah, the 90s can definitely go fuck itself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 02:28 PM
50

Read the comment I made in the thread, I used to think this too, but there is toxic root to your actions that you’re probably not conscious of. Read into performative femininity. You can enjoy makeup, etc. and still be able to acknowledge that it stems from a problematic place. It’s like eating sweets when you know it’s bad for you. I encourage you to think critically. No single human behaviour is actioned without influence. There is no such thing as free will. Every single thought and behaviour…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 01:44 PM
239

The cosmetic and beauty industry capitalises on dehumanising women and creating insecurities to then be able to exploit. You are completely right. I used to debate the notion of performative femininity, thinking I could have power through my physical appearance. I might present as polished and intimidating, but really I’m not the one in control, I don’t have power no matter how powerful I thought I felt. I am being objectified, not respected. I really took the time to critically analyse and unde…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 01:34 PM
1

I know, that’s why I said even if it’s to benefit themselves. Quitting is quitting, no matter what the reason. With the lack of demand, supply would go down.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 09:36 PM
79

The last comment! 😂 Accepts guys request to be able contact police to do a welfare check on him
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 02:41 PM
13

Pretentious AND a porn addict?! WOW, what a catch!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 02:21 PM
12

I agree with you. They aren’t special, but it’s still important that there are men recognising the exploitative, dehumanising nature of porn, and actively cutting it out of their life to be able to have an actual connection to a person. No they don’t deserve props for the bare minimum, but self-awareness is an invaluable trait in a person, especially when efforts are then made to action self-improvement. Problem is, in the context of intimate partner relationships, most (hetero) men don’t listen…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 02:18 PM
309

This is just TOO much to unpack! I cannot deal with this anymore! I feel so sad for how conditioned and manipulated these women are into hating themselves. Even when I was a naive pick me in my teens/early 20s, I never normalised porn/e-prostitution/hook up apps. I could still see the obvious, it was all demented ways to exploit women and cheat. Just, no. No to all of this. Stop being a dickwarmer for dropkick guys and find some better fucking purpose in your life. Ladies, if you find yourself t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 02:03 PM
13

The other guy probably saw the value in the woman that old scroty did not!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 11:07 AM
77

Men do not feel guilty for dropping women without hesitation for superficial crap like the woman’s tits/ass wasn’t big/small/fake enough. DO NOT FEEL BAD FOR MEN. THIS IS HOW THEY MANIPULATE YOU. Attraction to his penis is not superficial. If we’re expected to get cozy with his dick on the reg, you better believe I have to find it attractive. If it looks mangled or sickly, how is any woman supposed to stomach putting it anywhere near her vagina, yet alone mouth! To be fair, same goes for all gen…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 10:51 AM
47

Right?! The comments are super demented and they seem to revel in the misery of the women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 07:52 AM
16

Exactly this comment. This is just manufactured news. It’s all a distraction from things that actually matter in life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 10:33 AM
44

All I can think of is non-disclosure agreements that she may have been forced to sign for the sake of their foundation, kids, etc. Who knows, not defending her by any means, but women are typically manipulated, groomed, or coerced into hiding criminal behaviour of their male loved ones.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 10:31 AM
42

The trash took itself out, sis. Trust. Take it as a blessing before the abuse gets worse as you stay with his shrivelled pornsick ass. Unless it did already, then I am sorry. He will have his moment of clarity, three years later, as he jacks off in the dark for the 17th time in the day, forever alone and utterly unremarkable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 10:22 AM
25

This is what I feel when making friends as an adult. It’s super relevant to pretty much every scenario, like when finding out someone is racist, sexist, homophobic, etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 10:00 AM
19

Yeah, just has a name that’s easier to call out now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 04:32 AM
13

HAES pushers don’t want to accept reality. They would rather everyone else changes their perception of biology than attempt to accept facts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 04:30 AM
19

Cillian Murphy is just a superior breed of human. It’s bad, I know, but hot guys with good lips and jawlines smoking just does things to me 🤤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 04:16 AM
67

It’s classic negging. So fucked up, but redpill guys going for a hot girl will low key manipulate and neg her so she bends over backwards to gain his approval and validation which, surprise surprise, he will never give. Keeps her desperate to please him, and he gets the malleable bangmaid he wants. It’s unfortunately just up to women to be able to see through that shit and drop these types of guys. Red pillers are a write off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 04:09 AM
9

True. I think they try to justify the actions they’re put through and end up blaming themselves for all of it, e.g I should have tried harder, etc. I believe in personal responsibility but damn that’s just self-sabotage!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 03:45 AM
12

Realised your comment was deleted as I hit reply. I can see where you’re coming from, you’re well within your right to feel that way. Issue is, because this is primarily a dating sub, you’re going to be misunderstood from the get go. I generally think men are mostly trash, as I think most women here do (see: this), and I agree that this isn’t the best solution, but hey if it’s helping some of the gals here, oh well. My aim to maximise all female benefit, so if superficially ogling physically sup…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 03:41 AM
16

It’s interesting when you get a glimpse of what men really feel about women. Funny you say that, I have a friend very similar to this, he has talked to me about how unattractive the pick me personality type is, and he sees how they got there, but as a hetero guy it’s not attractive having women desperately throw themselves at men’s feet. The playing field isn’t level, there will always be a power imbalance in hetero relationships and pick me’s struggle to get this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 03:26 AM
11

I wrote in another comment, no one is saying these men are HV. I agree with what you are saying. This is a lighthearted and clearly facetious response to the amount of NV scum who reduce women’s worth to their appearance. If you’re a radical feminist then you would also believe that women shouldn’t be forced to take the high road, that the playing field isn’t level, and we don’t have to pretend that it is. This is a DATING sub, with DATING advice. Why would a WGTOW post on a DATING sub?! I recom…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 03:21 AM
6

I hear you, the kind of neo-liberal guys that will use their “logic” traps to manipulate you, no attempt to actually empathise with women. They’re so draining, they love the libfem movement though because it’s easy pickings. Where are all the moderate men, it’s all one extreme or another 😩
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 03:15 AM
10

I’m sorry that happened to you. No one is saying hot guys can’t be psychopaths and abusers. It’s a light-hearted thing. You can choose not to believe me, but you still have work to do with healing your trauma because clearly this is triggering. I’m legit not saying this to be a dick, I mean this as someone who has been in your position. I refused to accept things were triggering me, but I was snapping at the smallest things because I was still hurting hard. Again, I’m sorry that happened to you,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 03:10 AM
10

Why is everything black and white to libfems 🙄 Reread my comment. Everything is not one extreme or another.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 03:02 AM
48

The pick me’s are swarming this post hard. Could they kindly fuck off. Don’t stop FAF, keep them all seething.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 02:57 AM
10

I’m not being rude, just direct and pointing out facts. You can choose to not go to a post that triggers you. I avoid triggering screenshots of dumb subs, because I hate it so much, but I don’t go there and shit on the vibe of people who might find it helpful. So avoid these posts and you won’t come across as a huge pick me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 02:54 AM
11

She would’ve had to be reported a ton of times.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 02:52 AM
20

Yeah that’s a shitty situation. They’re productive, have hobbies and interests, but then their issues are more intrinsic and harder to detect. I feel like guys like that (with the exception of abusers) who actually take time to work on themselves can be decent, but there’s always collateral damage, girls who burnt themselves out lifting them up, etc. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 02:51 AM
7

Response to your edit. You’re choosing to view these posts. They’re blurred out of respect to those who don’t want to see it. No one is silencing or shaming you, you’re imposing yourself on a post that doesn’t align with your views. It’s okay to disagree, but you’re coming here with your holier than thou attitude, “reminding” us of something we’re well aware of. You sound very young and naive. I’m sure you’ll get picked if you work hard enough 😘
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 02:40 AM
16

Yes, and we all know this. This isn’t new information. We use the strategies to vet the shithouse personalities to drop them. And no one is out here calling them HV. You’re missing the point of this whole Fine AF Fridays thing. It’s a huge fuck you to all the trash who only believe a woman’s value is her appearance. What I am saying is that while there are trash physically hot guys, the guys who don’t look after themselves are even trashier. I hope you never experience it, but there’s a trash gu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 02:34 AM
111

Tall men with lush full heads of hair, lean and fit, strong and capable, mmmm yessssss please. I’ll take genetic superiority over pornsick weeb dick any day!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 02:25 AM
37

Sure sis, but reality is, the less effort he puts into looking after himself, the worse he feels, and the worse he treats you. Can confirm, the most good-looking LVM I’ve dated was still not as horrifying as an uggers NVM I dated back in my naive teens when I thought women should give all guys a chance. HAHAHAHAH HOW WRONG I WAS! bEaUtY iS oNLy sKiNdEeP!!!11! Nah bro, that’s a load of bullshit, guys who make zero EFFORT have ZERO beauty in them at all. They are the most entitled, abusive, manipu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 02:21 AM
9

I have noticed exactly this in the last couple years when I doubled down on working on boundary setting. Men listen to me more, take what I say seriously, and appreciate that I am ruthless in my honesty. I show empathy, but I am direct and don’t pander. I’ve had male friends admit to me how unattractive overly-apologetic doormat PickMe personalities are, but they’re easy because of their desperation for validation, which makes them even less appealing and only a creep will go for that type. Disg…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 12:52 PM
68

Don’t parent your own dad. That’s tragic and not fair to you. You can, however, low key undermine him in clever ways. Make smartass comments when he doesn’t pull his weight about how odd it is that a grown adult lacks basis living skills that you can just lookup online these days. Men are not as dumb as they convince women they are, they do that intentionally so that women lower their standards. Your dad knows what he’s doing, he’s just gotten away with it for so long, there’s no need to step up…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 11:51 AM
189

Just to reinforce your point, read this and this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 02:45 PM
10

Spot on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 02:36 PM
15

I am so sorry this happened to you. It was rape. You did not allow this to happen. He is responsible for his actions, no one else but him. He could clearly see you were extremely vulnerable. He is a predator.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 02:35 PM
22

I think it’s been around forever. Just more people aware and calling it out for what it is. Same deal with DV and rape. It’s not happening more, it’s that people are coming forward and sharing their story. Abusers might be able to slip through the cracks in the justice system, but they will eventually face the consequences of their actions, in some shape or form.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 02:26 PM
21

Every point you made took me back to a horrible memory of exactly that form of narcissistic abuse that I suffered. I hate that too many people fall victim to these sick, twisted abusers. I’m so sorry you went through this. Thank you for taking the time to make this. I hope that anyone reading this, experiencing what you’ve described, sees it as a sign to escape.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 02:20 PM
180

This is pretty much spot on. No one’s perfect, we’re all human and have our own issues to work on. What makes a decent guy is that he too accepts this and is just as dedicated to his own continued self-improvement, which is what makes a better quality partner. Nothing hotter than a man or woman who is self-assured and introspective, actively taking time to learn and grow through their experiences.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 12:12 PM
16

This comment gives me life. Such a plot twist 🤣 Can’t help but imagine someone super shady looking, shifty eyed, aggressively approaching someone “listen here buddy, tell me everything about your tortoise”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 08:34 AM
13

Why are you even explaining your standards at all? Stop putting the expectation on others that they should change their perspective and agree with you, and take responsibility for yourself. You cannot control others, but you can control yourself. I actually agree with what you’re saying, but what I don’t agree with is wasting time justifying yourself to people who clearly don’t respect your values and boundaries. You can choose to cut them out of your life, or limit interactions if that’s not po…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 04:33 AM
66

In my line of work, I’ve seen some of the most horrific abusers treat animals more lovingly and respectfully than they have ever treated women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 04:18 AM
40

Why are you coming at single mothers? In my experience it’s the dumbasses who stay in shitty relationships that are the most defensive of NVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 03:54 AM
38

I don’t have time for women who throw other women under the bus in desperation for male validation. There is such thing as personal responsibility. I understand why people behave the way they do, but it still doesn’t justify shitty behaviour. People are accountable for their decisions and actions. Many of us are victims of male violence, but we’ve chosen to take ownership of our situation and focus on investing in ourselves. This helps prevent us ending up in shitty relationships, and if do some…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 02:14 AM
164

Yet naive conditioned pick mes still relentlessly defend men, when even men acknowledge their own depravity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 01:35 AM
94

Aww cute! The pick me is trying so hard to get her sweet hit of male approval. I love spotting them in the wild, so fascinating to observe up close! C’mon lads, don’t leave her hanging! Tell her how she’s “sooooo easy going”! How “low maintenance” she is! How she’s “not like other girls”! Remind her that she has absolutely zero value to you since she doesn’t see the value in herself, so she’s the easiest target to exploit. Keep her self-esteem nice and low so she’s grateful for any crumb of your…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 01:26 AM
121

The idea of a woman having a life outside of men is beyond them. They think we power down when they’re gone. You know, because we’re just docile fuck robots who exist to serve our masters!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 02:36 PM
-20

Hahaha fair enough. You’re posting to a public forum though, which means you’ll face scrutiny. No harm having different opinions since FDS isn’t an echo chamber.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 06:32 AM
-32

Just seems counter productive to post a thread competing for World’s Biggest Doormat™️ on a sub that’s known to ruthlessly call out pick me stupidity and give solid advice to women about focusing on valuing and respecting themselves. How does your unproductive post that enables unhelpful behaviours seek to benefit women?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 05:59 AM
9

This is my lifelong mantra. I have actually done a fun hand-lettered poster of it for myself. Take the knowledge and bestow it upon the women closest to you, reminding them to stop being a doormat. And when asked where you learned of this great wisdom, tell them that there are rare internet strangers who share sage advice instead of gaslighting you to share nudes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 05:47 AM
54

In today’s news: chumps be chumping.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 05:37 AM
8

Yeah this idea is ridiculous. Nearly all Asian guys I know, esp E/SE Asian take really good care of themselves. Generally have decent morals, values, work ethic, pride in appearance, hygienic, fit, style that suits their body/taste, intelligent but humble. Not to mention, most these guys actually have fulfilling lives! The guys I know are always into hiking, outdoor activities, nature/scenery, photography of that stuff, reading, cooking (i.e. high quality food for a hobby), mixology. This is all…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 05:20 AM
10

I think the painting should be renamed: Me too (1874)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 04:59 AM
31

It’s because they’re so insecure about their looks they don’t think that a hotter guy would go for them, so they instead pander to fugly trolls who still pump and dump them anyway. I have little patience for pick me shit anymore. I have nothing but empathy when they’re coming out of the fog, learning to value themselves, and aren’t trash talking other women. But when they’re DEEP into their pick me values, they come down on strong women with self-respect, bully and badmouth us while stupidly bei…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 04:56 AM
38

Better to be a bitch than a pushover.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 04:43 AM
8

Why does this surprise anyone? I don’t care for “celebrity” types, but I know that they’re all the same. The narcissism becomes stronger and stronger, and the desperation to be relevant and validated never stops. She’s a kid that’s been groomed for a while by an industry that is well known for grooming and exploiting girls and women. No matter how strong her convictions, she’s not invincible to years of subtle manipulation. Think about how deeply the libfem rhetoric affected us until we came out…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 02:30 PM
24

She sounds like she’s deluding herself. Yikes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 02:23 PM
35

I don’t make losing bets. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 02:21 PM
53

Men need to stop asking these stupid questions. If they are insecure about their dick size, then it probably is a problem. I’m sick of these dumbass questions in news articles and magazines. “Does penis size matter? “Can women orgasm?” FFS CALL IT FOR WHAT IT REALLY IS! “Are men inconsiderate of women’s pleasure, only using them as personal masturbators?” “Should women soothe fragile male egos that can’t comprehend that they could possibly be shit at pleasuring women?” “Should men just fuck off …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 08:45 AM
4

Anything by Gail Dines.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 11:37 PM
194

Yeah! Develop toxic addictions that help you actualise the dysfunctional human you can be! LIVE YOUR WORST LIFE!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 02:56 AM
259

This really helps reinforce the points made in the huge amount of literature attesting to the desensitisation of male attitudes towards violence against women through excessive porn use. Horrifying that there are men who are perfectly fine with women’s pain and abuse being exploited for their sexual gratification.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 07:16 AM
1

It’s okay, maybe take more time to work on managing the anxiety before hitting the dating scene. You will find a lot of men who take advantage of your vulnerabilities and chip away at your confidence in areas you’re still feeling doubtful. You need to be 100% self-assured and very self-aware that you’re not (subconsciously) relying on their validation. Read a book called “Get out of your own way” by Mark Goulston. It’s really practical and straightforward with overcoming self-defeated behaviour.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 03:49 AM
11

I used to think this too, until I saw firsthand the often traumatising process of going from fostering>guardianship>adoption. Not sure how it goes in your country, but where I’m from it’s not that easy, and takes a very, very long time. I absolutely believe thorough checks into the potential parents background is critical, but often the effort you go through doesn’t actually end up guaranteeing you an adoption. Both forms of parenting has its own stressors, it’s pretty unfair of us to presume to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 03:43 AM
1

I can definitely attest to this. Men love women who have confidence and know their worth (see: Why Men Love Bitches). Appearance and “niceness” has nothing to do with it. Sure if you make an effort to look decent, that’s great, also the bare minimum. But OP seems to think her looks alone can cut it, it’s all about how you hold yourself. That “niceness” sounds more like a lack of a backbone and self-worth, not attractive and very easy target to take advantage of. Even the most LVM find themselves…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 03:32 AM
1

Not your fault, that’s the only way we learn to be able to see and avoid the red flags in the future. Only your fault if you see this and refuse to accept that his shitty behaviour towards you will not change unless he wants to. Which is very rare.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 03:19 AM
2

From what you’re saying, it sounds like you were low key manipulated into planning the date. If a guy gets an idea of the type of place you like, he will make the effort to plan a lovely date. If he’s keen, he will organise the time and place, he will not hesitate to get the bill because he was happy to be able to enjoy your company. To him, you’re worth every cent of that bill and any effort associated with it. If this isn’t what you’re getting, he just not that into you. Oh well. Move on. And …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 03:15 AM
12

Men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 12:32 AM
32

I sincerely hope those individuals who choose to forego this 'skill' out of a sense of pride or entitlement are very rare indeed. Replying to this comment because you deleted your downvoted comment as I tried to reply. Hope your pure lil heart out, sis, but they are not rare. Try to critically think about why a man would lack a reasonable skill to expect of a person. Remaining blissfully ignorant of a huge majority of women’s reality and lived experience must be a wonderful privilege. Be mindful…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 12:01 PM
14

Yes. It’s fucking creepy. Makes me feel like he’s a pedo and infantilising me is the closest he can legally get to his fantasies. Healthy flirting, speaking softly and gently is hella sexy and VERY different.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 01:02 AM
24

Translated: Women are realising their value. Is this a global issue?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 12:51 AM
12

That’s quite the power move.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 12:48 AM
31

Literally yes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 12:46 AM
34

Men referring to other men, esp his friends, as “boys” makes me mega uncomfortable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 12:35 AM
2

Look up the lady who chased David Tennant, she idolised him, determined to marry him. Huge pick me, think of the power he has over her. Terrifying.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 10:37 AM
7

Yep, they manipulate and abuse you too. Their true colours inevitably come through though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 08:14 AM
89

Holy shit this is painfully relatable. Ooft! When the pick me mother is overly defensive of his shitty behaviour and tells you you’re horrible to her precious little cherub 🙃
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 02:55 PM
2

This sucks to say, but as a WOC, I’ve noticed a lot of white guys are just fetishising us. Worst part is, they’ll present with lovely behaviours, but over time the signs slowly start revealing themselves that they’re pulling out all the stops so they can try to check you off their sick, perverse, fetish list.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 01:33 PM
26

It does suck that she needs to make a “not all men” disclaimer at the end, probably to protect her safety, but still low key undermines herself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 11:27 AM
11

Her definition of “team” is warped at best.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/21 12:57 AM
3

That sucks so much, I hate trainers and coaches like that. A decent one really is a rare find, mine doesn’t conflate femininity with being weak. It’s ridiculous that this is rare.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/21 12:46 AM
35

You can embrace your femininity and still be a bad bitch. I hate that things associated with femininity have always been put down because femininity = woman, and woman = bad. Fuck that. I love incorporating my love for all things pink and cheery into everything I do. I love boxing and so I wear baby pink wraps and gloves. My trainer never put me down, if anything he loved that I was unapologetically myself. People who encourage you to be yourself and embrace what you love will never come at you …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 09:37 AM
6

Gotta start somewhere. Ahhh, how low the bar remains.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/21 01:26 PM
11

Real talk, skip relationships all together when you’re a teen and early/mid 20s. Invest ALL your time and energy on yourself. I regret being in a relationship when I was 18, I was way too vulnerable and impressionable, I did not know to put myself first. But we live and learn. I took it as a lesson. You’re asking for advice and I hope you actually take on the quality insight that people have offered here. Enrich your life with your studies, work, hobbies, friends, family, passions. Investing in …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/21 11:52 AM
36

“Her glutes are well toned” sounds like some creepyass neckbeard fedora toting attempt at a compliment. A for effort though, he almost got it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/21 11:42 AM
2

Nah, I think this was a better choice! Stick to the wholesome stuff 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/21 11:35 AM
3

This meme just broke my heart. Oh, honey.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 11:51 AM
6

Can we take a moment to admire their house? Joke video is funny and all but that house ain’t no joke. Damn. Exaggeration aside, I actually think it’s super sweet when dates/bfs/husbands (not random creepy dudes we don’t know) open doors, pull out chairs, etc for their gals. It’s so wholesome. I like it when men are gentlemanly, affectionate and doting towards women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 11:34 AM
19

Don’t enter a relationship. Focus on yourself 100%.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 10:17 PM
42

If this was the actual norm universally, male and female socialisation would be radically different. I can see the general consensus in this thread is that men would continue to be misogynistic and resentful of women, but I would argue otherwise. Think about it, if a matriarchal society was all we ever knew, those men would be few and far between. Men would be socialised to be empathetic and empowering all throughout adulthood, not just change during adolescence. There would be less violence tow…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 02:19 AM
1

No worries! Strength training is the best thing you can do to help fast track the effectiveness of self-defence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 01:26 PM
2

Assert yourself and pretend to have the confidence that you wish you had. Eventually you’ll believe it. Also, call that shit out. Speak clearly, don’t show your anxiety. Hide that shit. Always maintain composure near male colleagues. Never give them ammo. Freak out when you’re alone or with friends. “You interrupted me, I wasn’t finished speaking”, “please wait until I am finished speaking”, etc. Drill that shit into him until he gets it. Doesn’t matter if he rolls his eyes or bad mouths you. Be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 01:21 PM
2

Why Men Marry Bitches.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 01:15 PM
3

Not sure what the laws are in your country but where I’m from carrying that is a crime if you’re caught. Take up a form of self defence if you want, but word of advice, just always exercise. Train hard and stay fit. Not just for your health, but for your survival. Helps to make sure you’re fast enough to outrun a dangerous situation, and strong enough to at least defend yourself and escape. Of course what someone else does to you to hurt you is not your fault or within your control, but you are …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 01:11 PM
3

If you’re posting OLD screenshots, depressing posts from other subs, pointless memes and tiktok shit, it may have been assessed as low quality and reported. There’s too much trash that’s posted and quality posts get lost in a sea of garbage so the mods are filtering out poor quality content.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 12:59 PM
34

Nope, you’re spot on. We’re focused on male partners/ potential partners here on FDS, but it’s important to take note that there are mothers and family members here who are trying their damnedest to raise decent boys by teaching them respect and empathy towards women. But you can only do so much, there are so many external factors that affect and influence their choices. We can’t shelter them, just have to hope they make the best of what they’ve learned and do the right thing. Breaks my heart wh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 12:30 PM
196

My kink is empathetic, emotionally intelligent men who are strong, generous, and resourceful. It’s pretty wild, I know. Don’t kinkshame me ;)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 12:18 PM
14

Even so, it’s not something that can be regulated. So many things can happen during sex. You may have consented at first but maybe became put off, creeped out, uncomfortable, etc. and withdrew your consent, but since you checked a box he can proceed with using your body because hey, you forfeited your autonomy when you initially consented!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 02:38 AM
16

HAHAHAHAHAHA “GRADE A WAGYU PICK ME” YES I AM SO BEHIND THIS!!! 🤣🤣🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 01:52 AM
107

Doubt it’s love. More like codependent attachment. Most young girls are socialised to think that male attention is the be all and end all. Lil sis will learn soon not to put men on a pedestal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 01:49 AM
15

Sounds like a spin-off from the Mission: Impossible movies 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 01:46 AM
15

Yep. Police commissioner seems to think the best solution to violence against women is to hide us or commodify us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 12:14 AM
42

Side note: we need a flair for news articles/opinion pieces.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 10:31 PM
63

One with super low self-worth. She doesn’t see value in herself, so how can anyone else?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 10:21 AM
8

Yoooo this is exactly how I felt when the penny dropped years ago for the GOT books/show. When I was in my teens I loved reading fantasy/sci fic as an indulgence and read the series before the show came out. It was interesting but every time I read a description of a girl or woman, something didn’t sit right with me, being younger and naive I didn’t know what. Fast fwd show comes out, I saw the problem: it’s just softcore medieval themed porn with loads of trauma and rape exploitation (HBO “empo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 02:04 AM
14

This is exactly what FDS is trying to get across to women!!! It’s not just about dating, it’s about being a decent and quality person, in turn having the self-worth to believe you deserve quality, and having the perspective to see where you’re lacking to be able to strive to work on every area of your life fulfilling you. A quality relationship is a bonus on an already wholesome life, but it’s not necessary to live a rich and fulfilling life. Thank you for sharing your journey, it was very inspi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 01:49 AM
32

Hard truth is that this is the case because men were involved in those protests. MOC will support taking down racism because it benefits them, but those same men will not help take down sexism because they don’t see the benefit to themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/21 10:23 AM
9

You can draw a horse to water, etc. People will only change when they genuinely want to, doesn’t matter how much support and encouragement they’re offered, you need to know when to draw the line and focus on your own needs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/21 10:08 AM
362

Not all drivers are drunk drivers, but ALL drunk driving ads target ALL drivers. Point is, it is much safer to be wary of all men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/21 12:23 PM
43

I don’t get it. What’s the point of this?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/21 11:21 PM
32

He was so close to getting it. SO CLOSE!!! I must’ve missed the memo where women groom themselves to be exploited into human trafficking, sex slavery, prostitution, and pornography.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/21 04:46 AM
-6

That’s fair enough but reading thru these subs is only going to trigger your trauma. Read wholesome content. Your experiences are DEFINITELY valid because we’ve all gone thru it too. Read wholesome tagged posts in this sub, check out the recommended book list too! I know you can’t avoid toxic men in some aspects of life but you can implement strategies to minimise contact. Edit: I started reading Untamed by Glennon Doyle based on another FDS users recommendation, it’s great so far, give it a try…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 12:49 AM
-9

Then read the damn handbook girl. We’re here for you but you gotta stop self sabotaging and feeding the despair. These subs are a cesspool, stop swimming in them, it’ll make you feel sick. There aren’t many decent men out there, that’s life. Focus on yourself and do you. A decent guy may come along or he may not. But at least your life is 100% wholesome as is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 12:37 AM
-10

This is fucked. Put a damn trigger warning on it. What the fuck is with this shit being posted on this sub. We come here for decent content and to avoid seeing the toxic shit that other relationship subs post up. Fuck sake. Reported. Post something wholesome and contributing to women’s growth, we all know that this scrotery exists.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 12:26 AM
78

So I ventured out to the rest of Reddit (lol why? Never again), lo and behold, I come across a relationship sub with a horrendous post about clear boundary crossing and general scrotery (so all of them). Now I know this is not new to us, but my goodness I’ve been avoiding PickMe’s for so long that I was gobsmacked that it was mostly guys speaking sense. Almost every female commenter insisted on pulling the Cool Girl™️ card and going on about how much she supports her boyfriends porn use and how …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 01:10 PM
16

Wow, that took a turn. Male develops insight! Next up: empathy! Next time let’s try not to make it about how hard it is for you and take a moment to think how impossibly difficult it is for women. Keep going little boy, you’re on the way to self-improvement.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 04:06 AM
13

Holy shit, are you me?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 02:45 PM
18

Porn has hyper exaggerated features on women so over time porn addicted men see that as a “normal” looking woman. So if they see an actual healthy normal woman they’re not attracted and more likely to be critical because she doesn’t have exaggerated features. They actively need to rewire their brain to unlearn that behaviour, i.e. quit porn and all associated types of pornified media (here’s looking at you Insta).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 12:49 AM
108

Cheers Paul, you’re spot on. 👍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 12:22 AM
81

Draws porn. sO dEeP!!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 12:09 AM
23

Same, sis, same.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 03:14 AM
47

I know I’m some stranger on the internet and what I say means shit, but please don’t externalise your insecurity of not deserving your needs being met to your current boyfriend, and if you have been, stop. Just fake the confidence if you’re lacking it, you’ll believe it over time. Work through that anxiety and build your self-esteem up with support from close friends and a therapist. Don’t let him see that insecurity. I say this because over time your current bf could start to learn to take you …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 01:41 AM
102

In answer to your question: there is nothing more intimidating to a man than a woman who is both beautiful and intelligent. Add to that her confidence in herself, then she will terrify weak men whose masculinity is rooted in oppressing women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 01:25 AM
159

That is beautiful! What a lovely, thoughtful man. Please be kind to yourself and don’t think that you are not deserving of thoughtful gestures. I know it takes time to unlearn, but remind yourself you deserve love and respect as well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 01:17 AM
39

PREACH 🙌🙌🙌
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 05:17 AM
24

I hate how the term “escort” is used like it is somehow more respectable. She’s a damn prostitute. Shit is still shit, no matter how you dress it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 02:16 AM
98

That’s nauseating. Too real though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 02:08 AM
53

Fucking yikes. This takes trashy to a whole new level.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 08:38 PM
21

I realised this not from a place of hope but depressing reality that men will always put themselves first. So some will eventually come to their senses and see if they want the wife and kids, they need to make an effort to be a decent trustworthy person. In saying that, women need to be ruthless with their vetting and drop gross creepy men in a heartbeat. Men are so good at breaking women and making them believe that they are as good as it gets. Women need to stop believing in men and defending …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 08:27 PM
23

You’re spot on. For too long I deluded myself into believing this because I wanted to believe the best in the men I loved. I was projecting onto them, I assumed because I am reflective and empathetic, they are too, they will learn from their mistakes and strive to be better. HAHAHAHAHA HOW WRONG I WAS!!! 😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 08:02 PM
31

YEP! Libfem rhetoric argues that women and men are the same and should therefore be treated equally. But that’s coming from a totally wrong angle, it’s encouraging women to “act like a man” while still carrying the burdens of womanhood. This is completely unhelpful and does not identify or appreciate the unique experiences of women that men will never know. True equality is appreciating and accepting the differences between men and women, but levelling out the playing field and having the same o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 07:59 PM
14

I agree with this, but she would likely need to talk to him about breaking up given their lives seem quite entangled. I do hope she can leave without having to talk to this NV human garbage, but still worth reminding that these guys lay it on thick when they’re caught out. And a lot of women give them another chance when they do. It’s important to remind each other to stay strong and not believe their lies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 07:15 PM
63

It disgusts me that men get off to women being brutally abused and don’t see the problem. I nearly threw up when I uncovered my NV ex’s horrific porn addiction secret. I am still traumatised. I actually think the only way is following FDS principles. Our numbers keep growing, slowly but surely women are waking up and tiring of libfem rhetoric. Women need to keep calling the problem out and have a zero tolerance attitude to their boyfriends and husbands porn addiction, leaving them and not suffer…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 07:09 PM
20

I’m nearly finished watching all of Schitt’s Creek and I strongly recommend it! Age appropriate married couple (who are quite a power couple at that!) and their adult kids and their journey of reflection and self-improvement. Very funny and well written.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 06:50 PM
37

Please don’t fall for his manipulation when you confront him. He will say all the sweet things to try to keep you around, only to lie and hide his tracks better. We have all been here, this will only work if you trust your gut and leave him. The relationship was doomed the moment he chose to cheat.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 06:45 PM
77

Great points made, I’m with you. I am totally okay with a society of women and a select few decent men. However the low quality men are weeded out is not my place to question, I shall be blissfully ignorant...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 06:41 AM
104

What a fucking sociopath!!! Anyone who lacks this much empathy for a woman suffering through a shitty pregnancy is absolutely twisted. He’s that desensitised to women’s pain... hmmm, where ever could he have learned that behaviour from?!?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 05:59 AM
47

This is so real. Guys who just train for fitness and health do not need constant validation and just do their thing. The dudebros who are so obviously juiced up are so needy for validation from their fellow twit. The funniest part is that these guys are usually super homophobic, yet they are so oblivious to how much they thirst over other dudes. Most of them are completely indifferent to women unless the chick is totally jacked and has super masculine features, so they’re interested in her for a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 05:51 AM
19

I think it’s important to take time to reflect and grow in areas of your life you want to work on. If you do want to meet new people and make new friends, join some hobby groups, classes, etc. You’ll be starting from a good place because you have at least one thing in common! I feel myself thrive the most when I invest in what I love and do what I know is good for me. I say the latter because I know sometimes I may not always be in the mood but if I know it’s ultimately for the best, then I’ll w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 01:53 AM
6

Oh babe, we’re all in the same boat. We get it. ❤️ My ex was the most abusive and cruel man to me. I have PTSD from that relationship, so that’s fun!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 02:22 PM
10

That’s so beautiful, thank you for sharing that. I will definitely get reading now, it’s sounds like a powerful book!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 05:06 AM
21

All of the above and I’m going to stress the anger part. He is hot and cold, very quick to lose his temper. To the point of becoming psychologically/verbally/sometimes even physically abusive. Remember that anger is a secondary emotion. These guys rage because subconsciously they’re guilty knowing they are trash for cheating and lying to their loving sweet gf, but instead of being a decent human, they project their anger, nitpick you and try to make you feel like it’s your fault because it makes…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 05:03 AM
27

Thank you for the helpful suggestions! I had a quick squiz of reviews for Untamed. So many hateful pick me’s coming at the author for celebrating her progress! That alone made me want to read the book even more. It’s so messed up when women come at other women who are proud of themselves, calling them self-righteous, and much worse. Men write the same sort of bios and self-development books and they’re met with praise, but when women do it, she’s a self-obsessed know-it-all. 🙃
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 04:37 AM
12

Everyday I find another reason to distance myself from being labelled a “feminist” because of how much liberal feminists have made a joke of women’s liberation and rights. What they’re advocating for could not be further from women’s rights!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 02:58 AM
17

This! Social media addiction is a massive cause for concern. Super concerning when they need so much validation from strangers. Narcissist alert! 🚨
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 02:14 AM
186

They define their “masculinity” by exploiting and abusing women. Their identity is rooted in oppressing women. They are not men. They are pathetic little manchildren.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 12:33 PM
19

That takes a whole load of self-awareness to admit! You’re strong enough to come to terms with that and you are strong enough to get through this. Remember that wanting to feel loved, safe, and appreciated are completely reasonable, but you need to remind yourself that someone who has only caused you hurt is not going to magically change for you. I strongly recommend you go through the side bar and read all the great posts to help you feel confident and recognise your worth. Focus on healing and…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 12:18 PM
58

An LVM ex who wants to “stay friends” essentially sees you as an easy booty call if he can’t get sex elsewhere. He’ll lay it on thick about how much he “misses you” and “what you guys had” to manipulate you to put out. Be real with yourself. Why would you post this here, knowing full well that FDS doesn’t encourage this sort of self-sabotaging behaviour, unless you wanted to be talked out of it? You know you still have feelings for him, seeing him is only going to hurt you. Stop that masochistic…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 11:37 AM
276

These are such important observations. Ladies, this is exactly why the vetting process is critical. If we let our guard down and allow problematic behaviour to go unaddressed, we are allowing ourselves to be walked all over. Trust your gut and be hyper-aware of the way he talks and acts. Don’t make excuses for his shittiness. We don’t owe some rude asshole an explanation for their own shitty behaviour. They can go and self-reflect, learn in the way women seek out information and grow. It’s not w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 09:19 AM
86

I’m surprised you stuck around. I would have bailed the second I saw where we were going.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 05:35 AM
269

Ooft! First date at Burger King. Way to set the precedent for what the relationship would look like with him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 05:24 AM
17

That’s my point tho, the fact that it has become a cliche that does not have to be explained is problematic af.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 02:49 AM
66

I love this. 😂 Side note: I’m sick of how the pinnacle of attractiveness is apparently being a “Victoria’s Secret Model”. Just no. Beauty is subjective and unique. Not just some cookie-cutter physical appearance. Fuck off with that being the standard of beauty.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 02:45 AM
164

Yikes. Where is the lie tho??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 01:08 AM
189

I had an aunt who used to say this to me and back in my pick me days, I never understood it because I believed that “equality” was possible. Joke is on past me because this is 100% true. Decent men step up when they see that you value yourself, they know they need to show you that they value you even more so you actually notice it and let them stick around.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 01:06 AM
8

I love that a post about gross scrotes has turned into a helpful recipe for a tasty veggie curry. Ladies, from now on let’s do this to all gross scrote posts. Make it worth the readers time by putting in some handy facts, maybe a recipe or two.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 11:10 PM
1

Says last updated 17 Nov 2020 but there’s no download link. I’ve got the old version and just wanted to read the updated edition. Ah well, no stress thanks anyway!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 10:13 PM
14

You are so right. Their porn addiction is horrific. I’m all for people recovering and focusing on their healing from something toxic like that, but addiction recovery means you need to definitely remain single. It’s not fair to put your addiction on anyone else, surround yourself with a positive support network to get through it, sure, but don’t make a victim in the process. I say this because addiction = lapse and then relapse over and over until they’ve finally hit the point in the cycle of ch…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 01:21 AM
4

I’m sorry to hear that sis, usually what we find out really is the tip of the iceberg, but better to not punish our mental state and attempt to find out the rest, just focus on your own growth and healing. ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 01:12 AM
5

You sure you weren’t the side piece? This is messed up, I’m sorry you went through that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 01:00 AM
24

There is a word: idiot.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 12:50 AM
16

It’s important to be mindful that some women’s “firsts” weren’t their choice and had their first experience stolen from them by a predator. It’s that kind of toxic virginity praising bullshit that is cruel to survivors of abuse and further traumatises them. u/Saitschik is spot on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 12:39 AM
51

Male tears are my viagra.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 12:26 AM
26

This is the ultimate “I am the manager” situation 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 12:07 AM
10

Nope. I’m with you 100%. Women wearing exploitative clothing moving around in a suggestive manner to “entertain” predominantly men? Now what other scrote attracting industry does that sound like?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 12:54 PM
2

Someone already posted this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 12:13 PM
4

Help! I keep trying to find a link to download the new version of the handbook to get a refresher, but there’s no working link or clickable download in the side bar, just says the FDS handbook and that’s it. No download link. I’ve tried to check on both phone and computer, scoured every corner of the resources but can’t seem to find a working link to a download. Can someone help a sister out please?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 11:38 AM
68

What in the pick me hell is this shit?!?! I’m all for people setting their own boundaries and all, but how in the hell does she think it’s acceptable and not cheating for her husband to ogle and mentally fuck another woman, and then go as far to socialise THEIR OWN FUCKING SON to dehumanise and degrade women, reducing their humanity to mere sleazy “entertainment”. WOW. This is terrible parenting. Yeah he’s 21 now but he has had terrible behaviour modelled from both his parents growing up. Being …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 09:34 AM
238

HAHAHAHAH THIS IS THE WORST THING TO HAPPEN TO HIM ON A DATE??!!? 🙃 AND HE WANTS TO BE A WOMAN??? 🙃🙃🙃WHERE THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN IS LITERAL RAPE AND MURDER!!! 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/21 01:14 PM
73

Leslie and Ben - Parks and Rec. They are such an awesome power couple!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/21 01:00 PM
20

Came here to comment this but I was beaten to it. Woman after my own heart! They are everything 😍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/21 12:58 PM
22

I love her. I want her to be my friend.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/21 01:28 AM
17

I love this 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 09:45 PM
11

I’m sorry to hear that. And that’s the thing, there are definitely male abusers who have also been abused through childhood, not taking that away from them. However, there are far too many male sociopaths/psychopaths/anti-social personality who have had an essentially trauma-free, positive upbringing and life. Whereas I am yet to come across a woman displaying those traits who has not suffered somehow. Equality will be a thing when we have just as many female psychopaths as male. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 09:42 PM
74

I second this. I’m in this field, women’s abnormal behaviour always stems from trauma caused by males. From childhood all the way through to adulthood, women are forced to be trauma sponges.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 12:06 PM
29

Enforcing boundaries is not manipulation, it’s self-respect.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 11:38 AM
7

I swear it’s always PE teachers? I had a creepy male PE teacher too, he would intentionally burst into the girls change rooms before/after class.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 11:32 AM
65

This is old Clem Ford writings, take her with a grain of salt now as she has become an ultra libfem with a white saviour complex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/21 01:50 AM
23

Shouldn’t you be off somewhere building me a house with your bare hands?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 08:26 PM
8

What this all translates to is they want a mother that sucks their dick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 07:57 PM
29

This is horrifying. What an evil little man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/21 12:10 AM
13

This comment just broke me. Holy shit, can’t unsee. Need eye bleach.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 12:19 PM
4

Most of the time I am just laughing at the man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 03:16 AM
52

“SOFT CHIN RAISED HIGH” SIS, I CAN’T, I AM DEAD 😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 02:52 AM
7

Ooft! That message reeked of pure neckbeard. His own message alone should be closure for him. But that would require self-reflection. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 02:50 AM
10

Cheers, Zak. If only empathy was as contagious as COVID.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 02:42 AM
42

Your soon-to-be-ex-boyfriend showed you what he thinks of you when you asserted a clear boundary, he decided to do what he wanted instead. You don’t know what else you haven’t caught out yet. Leave before you get in deeper, it’s only 10 months now. He doesn’t value you, stop wasting your time and PLEASE value yourself. You deserve to be treated with respect, you should not have to ask for the bare minimum. And side note: he’s a “gamer”? Eugh. He’s likely also a porn addict if he spends all that …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 05:15 AM
5

Absolutely, it can be dangerous. When I describe feeling powerful, I’m not just focused on my appearance but what I feel makes me a beautiful person, and that includes my morals, values, skills, accomplishments, and goals. It’s how I define myself. Notice I never said I make myself up, I look after myself. I practice self care regularly, look after my health and mental health, exercise, eat right, take care of my skin, I believe that’s taking pride in my appearance and I feel beautiful when I lo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/21 01:39 AM
2

I get what you’re saying. Not agreeing does not mean not understanding. It’s okay for people to have different perspectives and respectfully share them with you, as you have shared yours. You can’t expect an echo chamber. I agree with much of what you’re saying, especially surrounding surgery. However, I think your stance is black and white and very judgemental. Women making these choices deserve fairness because we don’t know every lived experience they’ve gone through, and we have no right to …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/21 01:33 AM
2

I think my comment was take a bit too literally. And yes, I set the standards for myself, because just like we expect men to unlearn problem behaviours, I also have worked hard to unlearn socialised behaviours and make a conscious effort to recognise when I’m behaving on my own accord or whether it’s a socialised behaviour. I also think that you have a black and white opinion on this, I never spoke about slathering makeup etc. Your comment reads bitter and jaded. I get it though, sometimes I fee…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/21 01:25 AM
53

Yes, all of this stems from toxic roots, but if it helps alleviate some of a woman’s distress, then she should be free to do what she pleases. I dress well and take pride in my appearance because it makes me feel powerful. I can see the affect I have on people, whether they are intimidated by me, attracted to me, I don’t let that affect my confidence in myself, I learn to work it to my advantage. Powerful and beautiful are not mutually exclusive. But I set the standards for my own beauty, I don’…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/21 07:05 AM
104

The reality of BDSM is that most of the women who engage in it are victims of some form of trauma, and they cope using unhealthy sexual behaviours to try to regain power over their bodies which were stripped of it’s autonomy. Most of the men who engage in it, on the other hand, just see it as an opportunity to torture and abuse vulnerable women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/21 06:54 AM
102

Most men?! What????? I hate it when scrotes like this try to normalise being disgusting. No dude. Just fucking no. Even the average fuckboy takes pride in his hygiene and appearance to help in manipulating his victims.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/21 06:48 AM
7

May their terrible diets rid us quickly of their putrid existence. Amen.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 06:14 AM
7

7 minute shower?! Dude, are you gay? I have mine in 1 actual minute, if that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 06:12 AM
13

Yikes. This is cringey AF. I got secondhand embarrassment watching this. Poor girl, so desperate to be picked. Hopefully she sees the light soon.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 06:07 AM
5

That sounds dangerous!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 06:02 AM
30

They’re probably just envious of how wholesome and empowering women in this community are, and because they don’t have meaningful interactions in their lives, they want to take ours away from us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 12:20 AM
3

Every young girl should get copy of this so they don’t buy into that shit quicker. This is awesome!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/21 10:02 PM
65

This is an accurate description.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/21 09:59 PM
2

Weird that we’re downvoted for disagreeing and encouraging healthy skepticism.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 10:52 AM
18

I have dated both and feel like the taller guys seem more confident in themselves, less controlling than their shorter counterparts. In saying that though, that alone doesn’t make a high quality man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 10:50 AM
0

Sorry to rain on your parade, but this seems like something his legals advised him to do to cover his ass in the “MeToo” era.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 07:01 AM
2

I have lost a lot of respect for and rely less on The Guardian as a news source. It’s not independent or balanced at all towards taking a neutral approach with the news. Pushes far left propaganda too much which is just as bad as far right news sources. The opinion pieces are cause for concern.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 05:27 AM
16

Tell you what though, I am grateful that the experience pulled me out of my stupid liberal feminist trance where I was always catering to toxic hyper-sexual fantasies, and woke me up to the reality that is porn/sex addiction.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 03:27 AM
113

He sucks the life and energy from women for a living.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 02:07 AM
269

If they’re using the biology argument then yeah, women are gatherers, so we need things. Give us things. Prove you’re a worthy partner to me. Be a man and bring me the pelt of the predatory beast you hunted with your bare hands to protect our village.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 02:05 AM
312

Good on her for drawing the line in both her job and relationship. You only have one life, there is no point burning yourself out through it, you’re only fucking yourself over. I hope she finds passion and hope in her next endeavour.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 01:30 AM
27

Thank you for putting these scrotes in their place. I’m definitely in a better place now than I was, the anxiety attacks aren’t as frequent thankfully, but damn they are hell when they come on. Just sharing to help validate anyone else’s experience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 12:06 AM
72

As a woman who has been betrayed like this before, I can confirm it is much worse than he portrays. To become that irrational and say hurtful things to someone you loved once deeply means you’ve been pushed so far beyond your absolute limits. I developed serious trauma from what I went through and the horrors I witnessed as I caught him. At one point, I genuinely thought I was losing my mind. Worst part is, they absolutely are cowards, they don’t come clean and tell you everything in one hit, th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 12:00 AM
11

This is depressingly accurate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/21 01:55 PM
31

You’d be surprised, or probably not actually, a lot of older men were exposed to porn at an early age too (magazines/videos). Always some creep grooming them young. I’m a millennial though, you’re probably right, it’s more rampant in my age group since it’s more easily accessed and consumed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/21 05:05 AM
103

Can confirm. I remember in a job I had while still at uni I was talking with a co-worker my age about our studies (both students working part-time) and our fossil of a manager, creep that he is, comes over to us and says to the guy, “you trying to pick up a girl out of your league son? She’s more interested in a real man!” We were both so confused and disgusted, he had no idea what we were talking about, comes over and interrupts trying to flex on a guy half his age (who was not even flirting bt…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/21 02:26 AM
5

Let’s not forget the actual point of this sub though. It’s about dating and relationships. You knew your uncle in one context and that’s wonderful you were supported. But you cannot confirm what kind of a partner he is to his SO, and that’s the point of this sub, what qualities make a HVM partner. I have a family member that is an incredible father to his daughter but lacks a lot of important decent m qualities towards his wife, and I have observed this. He regularly interrupts, speaks over, ign…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/21 02:02 AM
16

I second this wholeheartedly. This post suspiciously carries “not all men” vibes. There is nothing wrong with acknowledging a negative experience, reflecting on it, and learning what to do differently moving forward thanks to what it has taught you. I’m seeing a lot of comments that conflate healthy skepticism with being overly critical. No, that’s anti-FDS. The whole point of this sub is that it encourages strong boundaries and being non-negotiable in your personal standards. Reasonable comprom…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/21 01:55 AM
10

A grown man being a part of a roster that teaches living skills to infant children should surely be a sign to him that it’s time to grow up. Of course not though, why would he bother when mommy-bangmaid is on the job! 💪
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/21 01:39 AM
13

This just in, in an unexpected turn of events, a man expects praise for the one time he registers women as human. What an uncharacteristic trait of men! More at 10.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 03:07 AM
69

Oh but he did though. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 03:03 AM
20

She almost recognises the issue, but undermines herself in the same sentence. So close! 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 03:02 AM
62

Same, sis, same. I am so tired of being expected to drop my standards for some waste of a human life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 01:13 AM
121

Are you me? It’s so shitty that almost all women have a story like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 01:11 AM
16

💯💯💯
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 01:08 AM
3

SPOT ON. 🙌🙌🙌
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 01:03 AM
6

But that’s our point. She is profiting from acting like a hypersexualised child. It is exploitative and twisted to be okay with receiving an income from something so corrupt.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 01:02 AM
2

I agree, but it still doesn’t justify the behaviour.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 09:14 PM
377

Exactly. Same deal as “ladies night” at bars and clubs, we get in free because we’re the product.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 09:12 PM
5

Fair enough, there’s a lot of creeps out there though, and she produces the closest things they’ll get to child abuse material that’s “legal”. She’ll keeping getting paid somehow.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 09:10 PM
13

That’s what shits me the most, she’s so sociopathic that she doesn’t care about how she would impact young vulnerable girls.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 09:07 PM
9

Eh I couldn’t care less about her future, right now she’s exploiting something awful and profiting off of it. Doesn’t matter if she stops, she’s already done it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 09:06 PM
12

If it’s not about them, they don’t care.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 12:41 PM
37

Ah, the dumb internet girl thinks porn is akin to sex. Bless.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 12:17 PM
16

This is such a great TLDR. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 12:13 PM
29

That’s what I said though. Bad publicity is still publicity. Attention still generates revenue for her. People don’t know who she is, people who don’t like what she’s done, etc. They all look her up, the revenue goes back to her eventually. It’s messed up, she still wins, she’s making so much money off this. She’s too much of a sociopath to care about how this will impact her future and how she won’t be respected.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 12:09 PM
59

She’s not actually fucking them though, she is exploiting the weakest type of man possible. The type of man who is deeply pornsick that he thinks a chick would pander to his sick fantasies in real life so he gives her cash because he thinks it’s one step closer to being able to actually fuck her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 12:04 PM
93

You’re spot on. She is absolutely devoid of understanding for what she is exploiting. She saw something foul she can monetise and she did, did not even take a moment to think about whether it was indecent or immoral, just saw cash. Absolute sociopath. What depresses me most of all is that we’re all here talking about her, she’s still getting the attention she craves. Bad publicity is still publicity. I hate the term but the internet needs to “cancel” her. She needs to be forgotten like the “game…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 12:00 PM
4

They are all vulnerable groups. Vulnerability = easy target for grooming and manipulation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 04:26 PM
12

Princess syndrome? HAHAHA NAH SON, I GOT QUEEN SYNDROME. I don’t keep company with fools.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/20 02:58 AM
14

He has issues he needs to work through, but that is not your problem. It is a “him problem”. He will constantly project onto you because you’re closest to him and have inadvertently demonstrated that you have no boundaries and will tolerate his abuse. He has made it clear that he does not want a relationship with you. He will backtrack when you acknowledge it and get ready to leave. Please stay strong and leave. Prepare for manipulation, sweet talk, threats of self-harm/suicide, gaslighting, buy…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/20 02:30 AM
43

This is SO accurate. It’s a hard pill to swallow for the far left, they can deny it all they want, but it’s an absolute reality. I can confirm as a person who works in the realm of dealing with abnormal male behaviour, all sex offenders, including child sex offenders start out with a porn addiction. Over time, these men become truly desensitised and seek out extreme, taboo genres. Then once that doesn’t work anymore, they seek out the real thing. Takes one glance at porn free subs to see that al…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/20 02:16 AM
74

Unless you’re married or in a committed relationship and you’re both respectfully letting each other know about your schedules/plans, you don’t owe some guy you’re dating an explanation. A simple response that you’re busy is fine, if he probes, then ask yourself why you think you need to justify yourself to some scrote and stop wasting time with him. A decent man will respect that you’re busy and will try to organise a time to talk that works for you. As for guy #2, if he is being needy and over…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 03:33 AM
38

Trick question. You would never ask him out in the first place.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/20 01:50 AM
18

Hold up. Gym dates???? Now I’ve heard everything! 😂 Running errands and doing basic life activities are not dates! NVM are actively looking for ways to avoid engaging in a meaningful discussion and getting to know the women who give them the opportunity to spend time doing so. How pathetic!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 11:22 AM
9

This 100%!!! Always always ALWAYS follow your gut feeling! Our instincts exist for a reason, how I regret every moment I ever doubted my gut feeling. Always listen to the warnings your body is sending out!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 11:13 AM
7

They are definitely trying to disenfranchise women if they’re advocating for prostitution and porn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 06:21 AM
5

Sis, you don’t need to lecture me on human behaviour after experiencing trauma. I am well aware through both experience and clinical training. Don’t police my tone, we can understand unhealthy behaviour and still call it out. FDS empowers women to take ownership of their decisions and create a fulfilling life before even considering dating. FDS isn’t here to coddle women, we’re empathetic, but realistic when it comes to unhelpful thoughts and behaviours. I feel for this woman, but it’s up to her…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 09:28 PM
69

Imagine having such low self-worth that you think you’re an asshole for being upset by someone else disrespecting you. I just wish these women would realise that they will never be picked no matter how much they give up everything that they care about to please a man who is clearly not into them. If he wanted you, he would’ve made the effort. He hasn’t, he ain’t interested. Move the fuck on. 🤡🤡🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 12:33 PM
87

So let me get this straight. This woman is so desperate to be picked, she provides sexual acts for free to sexually deviant men and genuinely believes the women are the problem. Right. Some people volunteer their time in community service roles like suicide prevention lines, homeless shelters, DV support, rape crisis lines, etc, but this clown volunteers as a community cum receptacle. Fucking yikes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 06:25 AM
21

I actually laughed out loud at this comment. Agreed!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 10:07 AM
31

Of course. If you genuinely believe a guy when he says this, and he’s not eagerly exploring and learning what makes you feel good when you’re intimate, then you’re only wasting your own time, dump him stat.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 05:29 AM
35

It really is evil, the fact that they put that much effort into studying how to manipulate and gaslight women is honestly horrifying. It’s straight up sociopathic behaviour.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 04:22 AM
15

Why are you posting this to FDS? Why are you giving these subs attention? Negative attention is still attention. I refer you to this. Spend your time on positive things, don’t waste energy on negative value crap like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 04:13 AM
121

Oh he is definitely aware of what he’s doing. He is slowly breaking her down until she becomes desperate for his validation. This will keep going until she will do anything just for the slightest nod of approval from him, and that’s where his depraved intentions will become clear. It’s classic RP scrotery. Men are smarter than they let on. Their greatest con is convincing women that they are incapable of the simplest of tasks so that women give up asking and do it for them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 04:04 AM
186

This. People cage their daughters, but let their sons run wild. Both young boys and girls need healthy boundaries and positive role modelling for sound development. Funny how people consider the bare minimum of feeding, providing a stable home, clothing, etc. to be good parenting. No wonder their relationships are low effort, it’s reflected in their parenting too!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 03:21 AM
12

Somehow I’m glad I did not know what that terrorist looked like, scum like that do not deserve to be recognised. You’re right though, I’d rather a guy publicise what kind of a person he is to prevent any wasted time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 03:07 AM
129

They’d find some way to defend their precious little boys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 02:01 AM
221

This is so accurate. Women who have poor self-validation skills, get little to no support or emotional availability from their partners, unhealthily rely on their sons to fill that void. It’s incredibly toxic, they become bizarrely competitive with their son’s girlfriends/wives. It’s up to the sons to assert clear boundaries to their mothers. In this case it’s different of course, probably the “not my place to get involved” mentality, but I’m willing to wager the mother gets involved in every ot…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 01:25 AM
19

I hear you sis. It’s like using her name will humanise her too much so to keep a good detached distance for himself, he keeps it impersonal like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 12:14 AM
32

His photo looks like a mugshot. Is this some kind of poor taste satirical site of the last thing a murderer of women said before they were arrested?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 12:07 AM
22

This. Negative attention is still attention.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 11:13 PM
4

This comment tho 🙌
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 10:38 PM
18

I’m glad to hear you feel that way but there are some people out there who like being given a heads up, that’s literally it. Not about being infantilised, or censored, or anything deeper. Just a heads up, this post gets heavy, especially if people are in an upbeat mood and just want a warning that something is intense before reading.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 07:27 AM
113

Put a trigger warning on this as it is a very sensitive matter and readers should be given a heads up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 06:39 AM
3

Good of you to reflect, it’s usually unintentional because it’s the kind of toxic kindness we’ve all been socialised to give as advice! We don’t realise the harmful nature of this kind of advice until we read into it and educate ourselves about how to productively manage and validate emotions. Or until it’s given to us when we’re feeling shitty and while it sounds nice, it feels super invalidating and achieves nothing. Nothing to do with being feminine, inner peace is actually very important. An…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 03:03 AM
5

Right?! Judging by the content though I think it’s safe to assume the creators believe prostitution is “sex positive” and “empowering” for women. Not at all to do with human exploitation or reinforcing the idea that a woman’s body is a tool that can be used at the whim of a paying customer. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 01:53 AM
80

His reason for not watching porn is inadvertently ethical and aligns with much of the radical feminist perspective. I’m very glad that you’re comfortable with him so far. But take a step back and look at the bigger picture, isn’t it horrifying that we’re so used to men with depraved violent behaviour that we praise men who respect women’s boundaries, mental and physical safety? The bar is so fucking low.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 01:24 AM
18

This is super libfem. It’s missing some major stuff.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 10:53 PM
30

You can forgive them without forgetting. This is a really toxic piece of advice, and I strongly disagree. Being dogmatic about forgiveness is not helpful to people who have experienced trauma. It is absolutely possible to resolve anger and find peace without having to forgive or forget. Please be wary of giving advice like this as while your intentions may be good, it is inadvertently destructive to survivors of abuse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 10:47 PM
6

I second this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 10:29 PM
13

Ah ok, I get what you mean now. In terms of understanding and exploring your sexuality, I would suggest to be very wary of authors who have a liberal feminist perspective as while it may seem empowering and body positive, it can actually be quite toxic and destructive towards female bodily autonomy and personal boundaries.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 06:38 AM
33

There is no such thing as a healthy porn alternative. Porn seeks to dehumanise and reduce a human being to a collection of body parts that exists to be objectified. That is not healthy at all. That’s like asking for a healthier alternative to meth. Not possible. I’m not going to write you an essay to explain how destructive an addiction it is, but I encourage you to read all the Gail Dines you can get your hands on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 03:53 AM
13

Once they’re blocked, they’re out of my mind and life. Not worth wasting time to even look back. 😁
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 03:43 AM
14

Doesn’t deserve a watch. Negative attention is still attention. Hard pass.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 09:55 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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