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fdsonlynoscrubs Archive

View 0 posts and 394 comments by fdsonlynoscrubs on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
385

They’re both gross, remember she’s the one who pretended to be Spanish and speak with a Spanish accent and not know the word for “cucumber” when she’s from Boston, her name is Hillary, and her parents are American as can be. I think having children for them is an addiction.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/22 12:07 AM
14

OMG why do men have the impulse to send us photos of their dicks?!?! I just had a phone call with a guy who seemed like a relatively normal human being on the phone, no weird conversation or comments, we had a few things in common, pretty decent chat. Then afterwards he sends me a photo of his crotch in sweatpants. WHY?!?! I was like dude you ruined it! Block and delete. I also think guys brains are getting jumbled bc of porn and only fans. They don’t know how to interact with real-life women. S…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/03/22 04:26 AM
40

I think at that point it’s more of an ego thing. That’s why we vet. These guys aren’t looking for anything genuine anyway so good riddance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/22 04:54 AM
147

Look up “single moms by choice.” There’s a whole community out there. Of course it won’t be easy, but lots of women go that route. I’m considering it myself. Best of luck to you :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 01:10 AM
8

Oh yes several times. After 3 years, 5 years, 7, 8… I believe his final attempt was after 8 years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/22 02:02 AM
4

Yes these are the men I date!!! I’m attracted to intelligence and the most brilliant men are really a mixed bag but a lot of them have these qualities. It’s the lack of eye contact that hurts the most in the relationship. And lack of physical touch except during sex. And they’re so rude to wait staff without realizing they’re being rude, because they are totally blind to social clues. I used to think oh it’s ok I understand them nobody else does I can he like a translator and he’ll appreciate me…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/22 01:04 PM
40

This happened to me! He broke my heart, I thought we were going to get married, but he said he had an “uncontrollable urge for freedom” and abruptly ended our relationship. Years later he came back, asked me to dinner, I declined. Said he had to “sow his wild oats” and didn’t appreciate me and was sorry. Said there was a new version of him now. Honestly I just have to say thank Gd for my gut, because the idea of getting back together with him made me feel physically sick. There were times when I…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/22 12:57 PM
15

Do men not understand that we don’t give a shit whether they’re turned on? Dick is low value and abundant 🥰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/22 12:43 PM
2

These women are all beautiful whoever wrote this has no taste on top of all his other issues
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/22 12:31 AM
159

If you’re upset, then you don’t need to worry if that’s “right” or not. I’m so sick of other people trying to convince us our feelings are invalid. Fact is that you’re upset! Focus on that, feel it, honor it, and then when you’re ready talk to your dude about it. If he can’t acknowledge your genuine emotions without being defensive or rude then he is a LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/22 10:20 AM
8

I’ve definitely gotten that rap battle message before. I wonder if it’s just a genetic option on the app or if some guys have it on a message board. Another one I randomly got from the same guy twice (we happened to match twice) was “does this mean you’re my girlfriend now?” I remembered it the second time and unmatched of course, but ew weird
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/22 10:10 AM
430

This is so sad. Whatever OP is looking for out of this situation is NOT going to originate with the dude. She needs healthcare, friends, family, and possibly therapy. I think she’s looking in the wrong place for support by going to him. He’s a wretched human, NVM, and any additional effort spent thinking about him or trying to engage him in any way is just a waste.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/22 07:53 AM
2

Totally agree
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 12:01 AM
96

Hey! Best advice IMHO is to read the FDS handbook. You’re absolutely right if he wanted to he would. So your choice is to accept this behavior for the remainder of your relationship, and accept that if you have kids with this person he will pass that behavior onto them, or get out now. Also, in general, I don’t think it’s helpful to act like something is no big deal when it really is. I work on that myself and know it’s not easy, but if you’re in a relationship with someone and you’re hurt or an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 03:36 PM
2

I feel like usually when people post “hey is there something off about this dude…” usually the answer is yes. Maybe not for the exact reason you’re posting about, but because your gut is telling you something. Idk about these movies, not really my hill to die on, but if you’re gut is telling you something is off then you should probably listen to it and explore that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 08:48 AM
7

You wanna kick it w pizza and anime, rock on, but if you’re doing it because you think it will bring you validation or appreciation from some random dude that’s what makes you a “pick me.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 08:42 AM
89

No job is “understandable given the current climate” but isn’t the UK in a labor shortage? This woman has been gaslit. Hope she can find her way out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 08:29 AM
10

I don’t have to do this very often but can I just say how EMPOWERING it felt when I got a low value booty called masked as a “you’re my friend and I care about you, come over to my place” text from a guy who was a friend and former neighbor. Instead of actually having to decipher the meaning behind his text and parse out the merits of declining without triggering some sort of “she’s crazy” screengrab to our group of friends, just a simple DELETE and it was all gone no fuss no muss. 10/10 highly …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 08:25 AM
14

I’m DYING at that sex egg twist at the end lololol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 08:19 AM
5

Yes exactly!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 07:35 PM
9

Thank you!!! I might. I have my DM’s turned off bc Reddit is a scary place, but I’m going to save this and in the future might come back to it and message you <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 05:58 PM
24

Thank youuuu 🥰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/22 09:00 PM
18

They’ll sniff around and make your life hell until they move on to their next prey, but look up “grey rock” and just do that and they will go away after awhile. Good luck ♥️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/22 04:22 PM
252

So…. I’m getting pretty close to 40. My 20’s had 2 big relationships, my 30’s had 3 medium-sized relationships, and in between I’m guessing I went out with about 100 or so men. If he’s out there, I’m open to it - but something changed for me last year. I got a new job with a 50% higher salary, moved to a lower cost of living city, froze 2 batches of eggs, and I just bought a house. Pretty sure I’ll be ready to have a kid on my own in about a year and you know what? The “ticking clock” has disapp…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/22 04:19 PM
29

Ooh another good one is that their personality changes when they drink. And/or if they drink so much they black out. I’ve been down that roads before and never again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/22 10:43 AM
27

One time I was dating this guy and I don’t really understand why but he would show me memes like this. He showed me a meme his “friend” posted on FB about a woman surrounded by cats because she was too picky. But this “friend” who posted it is a pretty fat guy out of work no real job who makes money by sometimes driving people to the airport for cash (not Uber, just driving friends for cash) and by begging. I said something like “I’d rather live with a hundred cats than that guy.” And the guy I …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/22 01:16 PM
6

I would just unmatch. It’s kind of rude.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/22 03:58 AM
67

I had an ex do this too. I had no idea until years later he got back in touch with me and asked “why didn’t you fight harder for us?” I was like what? The dude broke up with me, broke my heart by the way, and then for years was waiting for me to “fight harder for us”?!?! He’s gonna be waiting a lifetime lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/22 03:57 AM
28

So wise at 22!!! Good for you :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/22 03:53 AM
12

That’s true. He made some comment about how handsome he is and I don’t say anything because I knew it would hurt his feelings but I wanted to be like ummmm why would you think that. And he said how obsessed he is with the gym and I also didn’t say anything at that point but I was thinking maybe he’s not doing the right things at the gym because he doesn’t look like he’s obsessed with the gym. BUT I just held my tongue and smiled :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/22 09:19 PM
10

Lol I did tell him I got more of a “friend vibe” but didn’t say why. He didn’t ask. I wonder if he really has no idea how much of a turnoff his behavior is on women. Whatever not my problem!!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/22 09:16 PM
354

I just had a first (and only) date with a dude who did this to me. It was so weird and uncomfortable. Everything I did got picked apart. He literally mocked my hand motions? Like while I was speaking… And then he kind of ragged on my job. It was so weird. I don’t even understand why he asked me out. And then asked me to tell him if I wanted to see him again. No thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 04:06 AM
5

Lol let him be mad
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 09:23 AM
54

Totally agree. Aaaaaand another thing, I don’t recommend dating them until they’re at lease 6 months, preferably a year, post actual finalized divorce. There’s a lot of shit going on right at the end and no reason getting mixed up with anyone still in the thick of it or still angry over it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 09:22 AM
79

One guy I talked to lied by 15 years. 15 years?!?! The age gap - not great. But the lying?!?!?! Starting off with a lie as your first point of contact? Are these people missing a piece of their brains?! I actually had to stop dating for a few months after that one I was so enraged and disappointed with the human species.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/22 01:41 AM
9

I had a first date with a guy who did this once and it grossed me out. I was like no way am I totally not attracted to this guy. That was easy. However, a different guy did this and I really enjoyed it bc I was super attracted to him. But then he tried to kiss me, but I thought that was too much for first meeting someone and I dodged it. never heard from him after that. So, I kept my boundaries up, didn’t fall for the PUA behavior - but it was not easy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 10:20 AM
55

I genuinely don’t think it matters. You are you. What they’re looking for with you is what counts. Also, lotsa guys have “good intentions” but don’t act right. So, we go by their actions, not their intentions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 10:10 AM
5

I remember when I used to believe that love was this all-consuming connection that just happened. It was such a simpler time back then. But a few times I felt that intense emotion only to be treated like garbage in return. Then I realized, that’s not love. So, no, sadly. I think you can be infatuated with someone at first sight, and maybe for some lucky people that leads to love, but no I don’t think that’s how it works for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 03:58 AM
108

Lol that’s exactly what I thought. Like the whole thing was kind of weird until the end and then it got to a whole new level of weird.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 03:15 AM
19

You’re right. I assume any guy who doesn’t have a job listed or who has “entrepreneur” or “CEO” listed as a job is unemployed and swipe left.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 09:57 AM
175

Both people in this convo sound kind of awful, tbh. They’re just complaining about their lives and then talking about how they want to date / marry each other? Kind of like they’re just using this fantasy as an escape from their real lives. Also, I no longer date men whe are about to quit their jobs to start their own business. I’ve done that in the past - not a good phase of life to start dating anyone. As for your friend - sometimes you have to let people make their own mistakes. However if sh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 06:05 AM
14

In my experience early dating is usually 1X per week, then 1 weeknight + 1 weekend after a few weeks, then evolves into more than that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 07:38 AM
69

“He’s Russian and can’t help his roughness.” 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 07:36 AM
113

My rules: When restaurants are closed, I’m closed. Delete the apps, shut down, enjoy my life, etc. When things are open and I’m meeting new people through the apps, I always have a phone call or video chat first before meeting in person. No sense in risking anything in-person if the guy can’t schedule a call and/or is just not interesting. Other than that I think everything else is pretty normal. I’m vaxed and boosted and don’t have anyone I’m putting at risk, so happy to return to some sense of…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/21 09:34 AM
1

My dog liked most of my exes, but one guy I brought over and she peed on his shoes and chewed off a shoe lace. Sadly, I did keep dating him and he ended up ghosting me. However, now I know better for next time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/21 12:10 PM
3

Dealbreaker for me too. 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/21 11:27 AM
1

Yeah I think that’s a great sign. Shows they have put in an effort.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/21 03:53 PM
1

There is another post in this sub I just saw that applies to this. “That’s OK girl. You just forgot who you are. Welcome back.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/21 12:23 PM
4

This just happened to me and I said “I live near this area (gave street intersection), there are lots of great places near there.” A HVM will have the instinct to plan the date. We are not trying to turn LVM into HVM, just looking for those good guys who are already good :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/21 12:18 PM
87

This is what bugs me about when FDS is compared to crazy stuff like red pill and people say “both sides.” In this scenario, FDS would say block, delete, and be thankful the trash took itself out. The “other side” would say insult and manipulate to try to get this person to sleep with you. I really don’t see an equivalence here?!?! We are just walking away from garbage. They are CREATING THE GARBAGE.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/12/21 04:33 PM
8

I think this person has brain damage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/21 02:35 AM
329

Why yes men who are mentally ill should absolutely be avoided. Why is this a headline?!?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/21 03:00 PM
6

She probably left because he did something creepy and weird. Kudos to her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/21 04:26 AM
34

Abso-f-ing-lutely
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/21 12:32 AM
58

You can have empathy for him and it doesn’t make either one of you a bad person, but you matter. Your needs matter.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/21 04:24 AM
58

I call this the “pre-flake.” And no. Just, no.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 08:37 PM
25

FDS only works if you’re not afraid of being alone. I think that’s the core of what you need to work on. Building up your life outside of your guy will make it a lot easier to leave him. You already recognize that he’s not a quality life partner. Good on you for making that progress. You can rationalize your way into staying with him all you want, but it’s hard to see the truth when there’s something else you want to believe instead.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 05:46 AM
202

Omg this has happened to me so many times… thank you for pointing it out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 03:39 PM
31

My mantra is that my emotions are real but the stories I’m layering on top of them are not. Facts are facts, but if your gut doesn’t feel right - then something isn’t right. It doesn’t mean your assumptions are spot on, but certainly your emotions are worth exploring and sitting with and feeling through.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 11:58 PM
22

Absolutely. So many times I’ve caught myself forgiving these things, but the fact is in the beginning everyone is showing the best of themselves and if the absolute best of someone isn’t enthusiastic an consistent, then don’t waste your time. It’s only going to get worse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/21 07:04 AM
34

One boundary I have - if I can’t tell in the first 5 seconds if he’s straight or gay, it’s a no. I love and respect the gay community, and I know the younger generation is more open, but it’s a physical turn off to me and I have tried forcing attraction before and it just doesn’t work. I also did date a guy for 6 months who told me he was also attracted to men, that part came later when I was already emotionally attached, and my therapist first said “it’s fine” but as soon as we broke up my ther…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/21 07:00 AM
21

Smell is SO IMPORTANT
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/21 06:56 AM
11

Two books I love: I will reach you to be rich by Ramit Sethi Young, fabulous, and Broke by Suze Orman Earn more than you spend. Set up automatic withdrawal for saving. Invest for your retirement (401K or IRA) in low-fee, highly-diversified index funds. Invest at least up to your company’s match. Live your life. Don’t let anybody convince you to do anything with your money that you don’t want to do. If you do marry, make sure it’s a HVM and you talk about finances ahead of time because his debt w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/21 06:53 AM
135

Block and delete no response is warranted this isn’t a quality man that you want in your life in any capacity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/21 03:25 AM
80

Only thing I can say is never feel bad for one second for your achievements and success. We only get one life, and it’s short, so go for all your achievements and celebrate them. The men who can’t handle that can show themselves the door.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/21 01:55 AM
26

Called me “man” “dude” and/or “bro”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/21 05:58 AM
63

If you’re paying for Ubers to his place and think he has “too much power” I think you should end whatever this is, because it’s not good.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/21 03:19 AM
34

WOW I had a boyfriend in college who would lie to me about the most RANDOM things. I always knew he was lying but just let it go bc it seemed really important to him. Like randomly where he bought my gift from it said one store on the tag he said he got it somewhere else. I’m just now realizing he was maybe trying to gaslight me? I wonder if these guys know they’re doing it at the time? I ask because he wasn’t very smart or sophisticated and it feels like kind of a complicated strategic effort. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/21 06:38 PM
109

I went on a first date once with a divorced guy and he told me that’s how he felt about his ex while they were married. Said he was never attracted to her and was with her because he thought she’d be a good mom. OBVIOUSLY I did not go out with this guy again after that BUT it gave me some insight into their minds. I think, some of these guys, have such low self esteem that they think it’s the best they can do? Not sure this guy just seemed really like a sad messed up dude.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/21 11:40 AM
26

I honestly don’t think you can prevent this risk. The best you can do is create a life in which you can leave if you have to. This woman writes her husband is the sole provider. I respect women’s life choices, but you have to protect yourself no matter what.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/21 12:33 AM
31

There’s no reasoning with these people. I’m going through it now with someone I was dating who keeps making insulting jokes. Just have to move along.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 03:40 AM
5

Ok so I’ll start with all the obvious but necessary starters which is safe sex is physically, mentally, and emotionally safe. Starting with someone I care about, feel good about being with, makes me happy, and of course wrap it up!!! Also nothing good happens with either a good amount of natural lube or adding lube as needed so that’s an important one. To answer tour 1-6 : girl on top is by far the best and most efficient way for me to personally get off. It’s all about finding the right positio…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 08:31 PM
18

I also put a photo of my dog on my Home Screen so when I check my phone and don’t get the dopamine hit I was looking for from a text, I see a cute pic of my dog anyway and it makes me happy. (Still works even after block / delete)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 12:32 PM
164

Ew my first boyfriend 20 years ago did that. And YEARS after I broke up with him sent me a gross email saying how he loved that my ass was so fat and I should be a stripper… I have no idea but I’m guessing he read about negging somewhere and decided to give it a try. Well barf I of course deleted and blocked and he is just a lesson now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 12:29 PM
7

When I think about it that way, nope! My relationships all started with guys who took me to dinner on a first date.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 10:44 AM
13

I read that in the original version the characters were swapped. So the guy was LV in the original.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 12:29 AM
108

This totally reminds me of (attempted) dates in my 20’s but even then before FDS I knew to block/delete guys who changed a date to hanging out with their friends.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 07:33 AM
4

Lol you’re totally right
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 03:22 PM
33

People put this kind of music on their videos to get the audience to feel a certain way… it’s not working lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 12:42 PM
6

Lol I was at an event and had just met a young woman about 16 years younger than me who was on a dating app. While we were talking, she got a message from a guy asking her to come over and split a bottle of wine at his place. I told her hell no block and delete!!!! I hope she listened to me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 11:21 AM
625

Don’t unblock stay the hell away from that guy!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 02:09 AM
25

“well then don’t raise your son to be a scrote!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 08:46 PM
31

I’m glad he’s blocked now. What a perv.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 04:13 PM
11

Ewwww it’s the porn about siblings I bet. Grosssss
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/21 10:39 PM
11

Omg you are so right, I once dated a guy who early on told me his first ex wife cheated and his second ex wife was a lesbian. Well… after I got more info, I realized that he probably made up both of those things.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/21 09:54 PM
33

On a first date a guy told me his ex wife cheated on him. On a different first date a guy told me he cheated on his ex. Both are red flags when the huy goes into them ON A FIRST DATE. Although I did appreciate the heads up to get the hell out of there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/21 12:52 PM
14

So many men use mental health as an excuse to treat women like shit. As long as he’s not disappearing, cheating, constantly late, and/or just asking me to come over (booty call) instead of actually taking me on a real date in the name of “mental health” then sure im totally in board with dating someone who is working through his challenges. Our needs also matter.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/21 12:48 PM
9

“Sunk cost fallacy.” That money is gone now, but you do have control over your next financial decision. Make it wisely :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 12:54 PM
27

Just stick to young women before they hit the wall, and start the convo by hitting on her friends and insulting her shoes. /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 01:26 AM
4

The sister needs to ditch this guy and then get professional therapy. Something is way the fuck wrong if 3 boyfriends in a row are cheating on her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 09:31 PM
3

I was in a similar relationship, but it was 2X per week. It was fine for a little while but after that it was like ummmm is this going to progress or not? When I’m in a relationship, I want to spend weekends together and just be together - not just Tuesday and Saturday nights. He had good excuses, but ultimately it was unfulfilling for me and so I ended it. Don’t wait as long as I did. If you’re not happy - speak up, ask for what you want, and if it’s not working out then you know what to do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 12:37 PM
6

Omg good for them!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 08:18 PM
263

When he’s telling the imaginary woman what to do, he calls her “bro.” That’s weird, right?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 01:03 PM
30

Lol exactly!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 04:57 AM
13

Hell yeah.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 07:21 PM
199

This reminds me of a guy I dated who was super sensitive and wanted to talk about therapy and his emotions all the time and stuff like that. Then out of nowhere, we were with my sister and her husband, and he randomly made a passive-aggressive “joke” about how I’m super controlling or something like that. I was like whaaaaaa? Where did this come from?? I don’t really understand this type of man, but one thing I know is they hide their resentment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 11:24 AM
6

Whoooo boy! Sorry you had to go through that. At least we both know better than to have a SECOND date with these LVM. Also, the mental health + complaining about ex combo! It’s like a one-two punch!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 05:17 AM
6

Just to answer your question, I think HV is a very small subset of both child free and non-child free men. So I wouldn’t worry to much about statistics and averages, just concern yourself with how the men in your life treat you and make you feel. Good luck <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 05:16 AM
49

It’s shocking how easily they cry and play the victim while also doing terrible shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 05:10 AM
44

I just did this!!!! Went on one date and WOW he told me a lot that he shouldn’t have. Just friggin word vomit all over the place about his ex and bla bla bla . Then he said something like “ I feel so exposed right now.” I think he also used the word vulnerable. Now, I don’t know if he was doing this on purpose as a manipulative tactic. However, my first reaction was pity. Then, after I thought about it for a little while, a few days, I just felt anger. I’m not your therapist dude!!! Thank you FD…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 05:08 AM
2

There’s a virtual reality place near me that’s really cool, highly recommend! But it would probably be followed by dinner because the VR experience is only like 20 minutes long.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 12:01 PM
30

Yes to this!!! I just had a “friend” text me kind of a sob story and asked me to come over to his place. I felt bad and responded, and said I would meet up with him for a drink somewhere if he wanted. Hi response? He asked me, again, to go over to his place. That’s when my FDS powers kicked in and I realized HELL NO!!! I felt bad for this guy and I felt an obligation to be there for him because we were “friends” and then I realized he is doing some garbage that I want NO PART OF. So I backed awa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 11:55 AM
3

Ugh yes this definitely is what happened with me and my ex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 04:55 AM
5

It doesn’t sound like you effed up, it sounds like he did. You blocked and are moving on. Good for you! Next!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 01:09 PM
71

In my past relationships, I’ve noticed that when I am there for a man when he’s going through a really tough time, he leaves me when things get better. It’s happened twice with two different guys - 2 years and 1 year. Then, I learned. In my most recent relationship, I woke the hell up and got out. I can be there for someone when he’s having a rough time, but my needs also matter!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 01:05 PM
11

How many times as a kid did my parents and older sisters tell me “if a boy is mean to you that’s because he likes you.” How fucked up is that?!?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 01:35 AM
9

Ugh I hope the comments to her were “leave him”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 02:27 PM
16

One friend texted me to apologize for something (long story) , but I really didn’t have the energy to get into it, so I kind of just FDS’d it. I sent a text saying “I forgive you” and then just ghosted all future attempts at communication. If it’s not working, then it’s not working.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 04:48 AM
7

There is a LVM I know who just messaged me to “come over and see his new house.” Pre-FDS, I totally would have fallen for this hook, line, and sinker. Thank you FDS for waking me the F up!!!! What I found especially useful and empowering is the FDS rule that we don’t explain or respond, we just block and delete. I could have dragged out a long response that maybe he would have debated, ignored, or screengrabbed to show his friends how “crazy” I am. Instead, I just didn’t respond! No need. Bye du…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 05:29 AM
48

The author makes a lot of good points, and if it inspires you then rock on with what moves you! However, I wasn’t the biggest fan of this book. She only left her LVM after she met someone else to start a relationship with. And she idealizes her current relationship so much in the book. It just doesn’t sit right with me. The storyline of “I used to pretend my relationship was absolutely perfect, but it wasn’t it was terrible actually, and now I’m in a new relationship that is absolutely perfect!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 05:19 AM
13

Lol one time I had a call with a doctor and he kept on talking about digitizing his record collection. I was like who has this many records?!?! Turns out he lied about his age by 15 years. He probably got all the records before Spotify and YouTube ever existed lol. Of course I blocked BUT not without laughing about the damn records.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 03:28 AM
22

Holy hell, those poor kids. Sadly, they’re probably better off with their grandparents. I hope they get a lot of love in that home, they deserve it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 07:54 AM
17

Hell yeah that’s what I was going to write. You say NOTHING, just gather your things and GET THE HELL OUT
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 07:46 AM
56

It happened to me a few months ago! I was really surprised. I thought he looked young in his photos, but assumed he was just using old photos. Nope! Lying about his age by 10 years! Also I think he lived in a different city too. So…. Just all kinds of weird.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/21 05:37 AM
13

I haven’t had this issue recently, but I’m highly selective about who I swipe right on, I unmatch pretty quickly if things seem weird, and I also ask for a phone or video call before meeting anyone in person. By the time I meet someone, of course I wouldn’t call them HVM because that takes month if not years to determine, but at least they seem like quality human beings. On the flip side, because I’m so selective from the start, I often go weeks without chatting with anyone. Usually I get to the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 05:11 PM
1

I met a guy’s dog and as soon as he told me the dog wasn’t neutered, I knew things were over. If the dog isn’t well behaved, AND the guy has had the dog for more than just a month or two, it’s also over. Dogs need to understand basic commands for their own safety and well being and if a guy can’t even figure that part out, well... you know the rest. BUT I have also met some FANTASTIC dog owning men who treat their dogs like royalty (while still requiring a certain level of behavior). And kudos t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 12:50 AM
7

No wall for women... or for David Schwimmer. Honestly even Matt Leblanc doesn’t look that bad. It’s just Matthew Perry who looks gross and he’s the one hitting on 19 year olds 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 01:37 PM
26

“Would you like to go for a walk?” “I’d love to meet you, but I don’t really do walking dates.” “What?! That’s weird. So you can’t walk??” “I mean, I walk my dog, but I try not to treat men like dogs.” actual convo I had, I unmatched the dude after. No. More. Walking. Dates. Ever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 06:01 AM
10

lol I love each and every one of us!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 05:54 AM
11

Amazing! She makes me want to join Tik tok 😭
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 02:38 AM
22

OMG!!! FIRST of all, I love hot men, but I also love slightly above average looking men too so I’m not a bod snob. HOWEVER why is “Dad Bod” even a term?! Big whoop. There are no miracles happening there!!! Why isn’t society worshipping at the altar of MOM BODS?! Those bodies are creating LIFE!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 02:35 AM
2

Hell yeah that was my first thought!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 02:29 AM
8

HAHAHA that’s hilarious!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 02:28 AM
1

Thank you!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 01:37 AM
2

What did Annie say back?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 12:41 PM
5

David. His name is David.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 12:35 PM
3

I dated a neurosurgeon and he was one of the most available men I’ve ever dated in my life. Called me multiple times per day, saw me multiple times per week. His schedule was insane, but he put in an effort because it was important to him. So, no, it’s not about the guy being busy. It’s about the guy not being capable of handling his life or just not wanting to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 12:33 PM
3

Ugh I had an ex who would mock me and whine (in my voice, as if he were me) “nobody loves me.” Because I would call him out on doing things like shutting the door in my face, not including me in conversations, being late and double booking drinks with other people before we were scheduled to hang out. So his go-to was that I was overreacting, and so he would pretend he was me and whine to mock me. What a piece of crap.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 12:17 PM
13

I’ve never lived with a BF, but it sounds AWFUL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 12:12 PM
6

I think my vetting will remain the same. I’ve been taking such good care of myself, the bar is set pretty high for any man to come in and improve my life. Phone or video call before meeting in person. Job and education need to be on point. If they’re divorced, that needs to be finalized and I don’t want to hear them say anything nasty about their exes except for “it just didn’t work out.” Make plans, show up on time, kind to wait staff, smell good... I feel like that weeds out most of the scrote…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 12:31 PM
5

For a few of us older ladies... if a man has children he must be fully divorced that has been signed and completed, and he must share custody in a reasonable way. If a man says to you “I have kids that live in another country” or “I have kids but I never see them because [complaint about ex wife here] run FAR AWAY AS QUICKLY AS YOU CAN because they are the ultimate LVM. If they cannot commit to their own children they will never commit to you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 02:24 AM
7

I’m here on vacation w my friend who is also a FDS fan and OMG THESE SCROTES!!! We have been hit on by two different men who are both here with their wives / girlfriends. Can you imagine going on vacation with your significant other and he hits on women while you’re away for five minutes? And no it wasn’t innocent flirting, one of these guys I specifically asked “who are you here with” and he said “oh some friends they’re over there” and then the girlfriend comes up to us... lol ok dude. The aud…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 02:19 AM
2

Good luck getting out!!! You’ll get there, you deserve it :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 03:32 AM
5

I’ve done this a few times, and it’s pretty helpful. Basically - I grieve the end of the relationship (or dating experience, or whatever you want to call it) on my own before it’s officially over. Story 1 - there was a guy who I wasn’t dating seriously, but I had known him for years as a friend and really liked him a lot, and sadly after a a few dates it seemed like he was playing games even though I didn’t fully have the whole story. Even so, something didn’t seem right, and I spent one night i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 03:31 AM
15

I dated a guy who told me his ex wife is a lesbian and his ex before that cheated on him. Ok, stuff happens. But then he would talk about both of them a lot and still get angry, and I thought, hmmm... red flag. Then one day he mentioned his ex wife isn’t out of the closet, and I realized ... omg these are just stories he made up in his mind. Like maybe she stopped sleeping with him because she didn’t want to sleep with him anymore and now he’s just telling everyone she’s gay. And the one before …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/21 10:34 AM
61

Lol he writes “is it because of Covid?” NO YOU IDIOT ITS BECAUSE OF YOU
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 02:52 PM
21

A horrible boyfriend I had in college sent me a MULTIPLE PAGE EMAIL months after we broke up in which he told me that I had such small boobs and such a big butt but he loved them both and he’s probably the only one in the world who would love my body that much. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck that
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 07:29 PM
1

I’m really sorry to hear that, but I’m happy you got out. Onward!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 08:18 PM
10

Absolutely. My last relationship ended because of this. I tried to be there for him and support him, but he just totally shut down and became a shell of a man. I gave it 6 months until I woke up and realized my needs weren’t getting met and even if things changed at some point, the next time something like this happened we would go down the same road. I remember thinking “what am I holding on to?” and I left. I wish him and his family the best but I couldn’t martyr myself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 01:10 PM
38

I’m glad to hear that at least he’s getting the correct comments. Reddit can be a weird place, I never know where the hive mind is gonna go.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 01:05 PM
2

https://youtu.be/EUkz40RNvXI This episode is so good!!! Also a reminder not to jump into a relationship super fast just bc society is pressuring us that “time is running out.” It seems like that’s one reason why she got super serious with him right away.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/21 10:16 AM
5

Yes I listened to this podcast when it first came out!!! She really showed all the receipts with videos and photos of him on her Instagram! Then a few weeks after the podcast, she updated her Instagram and removed all mentions of him. Idk what’s going on now, but her insta is now private. I hope she’s ok.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 04:31 AM
7

If anyone falls out of bounds of HVM, then it doesn’t matter avoidant anxious whatever. If they’re not treating you well and if you’re not happy then we all know what to. THAT BEING SAID, after years of dating avoidant dudes, I just experienced a new hell of dating an anxious dude, and that sucks just as bad if not worse because it’s a totally different kind of mental trip. Like oh they’re so emotionally available! Always showers attention and affection on me! Texts and calls throughout the day!…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 01:50 PM
15

UGH this post reminds me of 15 years ago when I had a boyfriend living with me in MY apartment rent free because I was an idiot and doped up on love hormones and he was in between apartments. We went on a run and one day in the first 5 minutes of the run he just ran across a busy street without me, that I could not cross because of traffic, and we just ran two separate paths that day. So glad that relationship ended just a few months after that but of course not until he moved out into his own p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 07:52 PM
5

“What can I do better” - realize your needs aren’t being met and leave.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:08 PM
5

Seems like that to me too! Hope her kid is ok.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:06 PM
5

Knitting! It’s so peaceful and satisfying :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 11:54 AM
16

“Vetting all the men in your life is so important.” Hell yes!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/03/21 02:47 AM
27

Block and delete this one. HVM is consistent and follows through when he says he’s going to do something. This guy isn’t a HVM. For the next batch of men you date - think of dating like you’re researching to find out if you’re a good fit for each other. It’s actually hard in the beginning because everyone is on their best behavior in the beginning, you don’t get to know the actual person for a while after that. Might help you to not get too attached right away because you don’t even really know …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 02:31 PM
8

I hope that this was scripted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 06:39 AM
9

The only true sociopath I think I’ve met in my life was the first and only man who talked about women in a way that was like... they are more desirable if their families are rich. In my mind, I was so naive, I was like.... how does that matter at all? Now I realize - It matters because he wants to syphon money out of her, that’s how.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 06:36 AM
16

This has happened to me before!!! I guess there is like a blog or something telling men to do this? Pretend they texted and that we didn’t respond and they are only now realizing that maybe the texts didn’t go through? It seems like such a complicated way for the trash to take itself out, but ok guess it’s worth a shot.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 06:34 AM
33

This has happened to me before when I’ve ended things with randos from the app! “I don’t think we’re a match, best of luck to you!” “I think you’re beautiful! Are you sure you don’t want to give me a chance?” “Oh geese, well since you think I’m beautiful.... might as well, lol.” (NOT!!! I do not respond like this)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 06:29 AM
1

I hope she blocked him after this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 06:25 AM
51

Ugh yes apparently you were reading my mind a few years ago and just typed it all out now on Reddit? If I just find the perfect time to say exactly the right thing, then he would understand. Uh no... that glazed look over his eyes sealed the deal. Either by choice or by brain defect, he was never going to “get it.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 06:23 AM
2

Want them with a HVM or on my own! I can do it on my own, have frozen eggs, it’s becoming a very serious option.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/21 07:13 AM
10

When the pandemic first hit it was almost a joke how often random exes / ghosts were getting back in touch with women, and I was really proud of myself bc I hadn’t heard from any of them. Most of them I had blocked. BUT then around May / June, I got a FB message from a guy I had dated 15 years earlier!! Married now with kids. “How are you holding up with all this?” Lol whaaaaat? I didn’t respond obviously. I wanted to write something like “idk maybe you should ask your wife how she’s holding up,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/21 07:10 AM
71

I know what you mean, but what I’ve found is that in the relationships I’ve had where men pay the bill 100% of the time without question, I feel like totally liberated to treat him in other ways. Cooking dinner on nights we stay in, buying him little gifts, etc. When I have split the bill or done the thing where he pays one meal I pay the next, I feel like I’m always keeping track of who has paid what and it’s just a buzzkill.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/21 07:01 AM
23

Absolutely. And when it’s really bad, and by that I mean so bad I don’t even want the stench of his energy on me, I will pay 100% of it just to get out the door ASAP.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/21 06:59 AM
18

I have absolutely no issue splitting the bill.... with a man that I will never date again. I’d rather spend $50 for a quick lesson about how cheap and / or thoughtless he is than months or even years figuring it out the hard way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/21 06:57 AM
40

They also have something they call “divorce rape” (maybe that’s not red pill but a different brand of these guys, idk). It’s so weird to me, like if you hate women so much, why do you care if they leave?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 03:49 PM
59

Totally agree. The woman is awesome the show is in and of itself a problem. I was on a walk a few weeks ago and I saw what looked like two elderly people take a very dramatic slip and fall. When I got closer it was clear this was for a show - they were wearing wigs and very fake makeup to make them look old. People came to help them, but I felt bad for the people - I also didn’t just want to be on camera walking past someone who looked like (from a distance) that they needed help. I think maybe …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 03:45 PM
49

So... he’s not attracted to women
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 04:00 PM
101

Lol well maybe that mentality explains why Japan is at an all time low birth rate, with the government even paying to intervene and host “singles parties.” Meanwhile women in Japan are living their best lives, investing in themselves and their pets. Noping right out of that misogyny.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 05:35 AM
73

I think the best indicator is that if something seems illogical or irrational to you, and you discuss that with the person you’re with, and the person you’re speaking with tells you that you’re “crazy” - they are probably trying to manipulate you. A good, trusted friend or family member can be a good confidant to help you walk through specific situations. Good luck out there <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 07:12 PM
89

I think guys who say they just want to be friends means they just want to have the option of sleeping with you at some point without any commitment or expectations.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 04:36 AM
25

I think he’s trying to be snarky or a troll. I’ve seen this perverse sense of humor on Reddit quite a bit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 04:33 AM
578

I’m going to guess this woman is also pretty bright but the man is too lazy to actually find mutual interests and/or things to talk about. Watching reality tv doesn’t mean you’re dumb and have nothing else going on. I had an ex once who used to complain that we didn’t have good conversations and I would be like “well what do you want to talk about” and he brought nothing to the table. I suggested we read a book at the same time and then discuss it. He never read the book. LVM. He just wanted to …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 05:29 PM
16

Nobody has ever asked me this, but when I get an inappropriate question I immediately unmatch / block / delete. You might want to take a look at these guys and see if they have anything in common, to see if there is something you should be avoiding in your swiping selection. Personally, I swipe left on any man who doesn’t list their job and/or education. I also swipe left on any man who isn’t smiling looking at the camera in at least one photo. And any man who doesn’t have at least a short and e…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 01:04 PM
2

Lol never.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 06:02 AM
19

I feel like when guys curse via text, especially if they curse before you’ve even met, it’s a bad sign. Bad manners, or just don’t care about you. Maybe I’m an older generation but it seems LVM to me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 06:01 AM
19

My story is definitely not as bad as the others, but once in my 20’s a guy picked me up and didn’t know where we were going. He parked outside of the neighborhood where the location was supposed to be, in a residential area, so he wouldn’t have to pay for parking. I was wearing heels and the endless wandering killed my feet. Eventually after walking for 20-30 minutes (in heels!!!!) he admitted he didn’t know where he was going and instead of looking it up, he called his cousin (?!). I looked the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 02:43 PM
87

Yeah queen shit is not dating these gross LVM in the first place. And sleeping with them knowing how gross they are? We respect our bodies too much for that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 05:49 AM
9

Thanks for the recommendations! One criticism of Untamed - she goes straight from one relationship into the next and idealizes her new relationship. Hey it’s great to be happy, and the new relationship seems great, but I’m just a little doubtful of these gurus that go straight from one relationship to the next. How do you learn and grow without being on your own for a little while?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 02:36 PM
5

He made my dog sleep in her crate on a different floor. I shouldn’t have allowed this, I still feel guilty about it, but he was having problems sleeping and I thought it was a compromise that would help him sleep. No. Never again. My dog and I left him a long time ago and we will never bother his sleep again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 02:32 PM
5

I don’t think what you said to the man was wrong or over the line in any way. As for the woman who said the horrible things to you, maybe the best thing to do would have been to leave when you saw she was there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 03:16 PM
13

Congrats it sounds like a huge accomplishment!!! It sounds like the men who make those comments to you don’t know anything about fitness, so really they’re weeding themselves out. It’s kind of cool how guys who are fit are actually more encouraging, and they also happen to be better looking and live a healthier lifestyle, so it’s a win-win! I have a guy friend who is a good person but ODDLY competitive with the women he dates. Like oh you like this team? What’s the answer to this absurd trivia q…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 03:07 PM
9

There is a self-depreciating sense of humor that I see on Reddit but NOT with the men I know in real life. On Reddit, they call themselves “autistic” and mentally disabled as a joke. They post major fails from their attempts at online dating. Things that nobody should be proud of, but it’s kind of like “I have no chance of succeeding so I’m going to give up and make a joke out of it.” So that’s the kind of humor I guess fuels this “I’m a huge loser lol and she somehow loves me for it lol” kind o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 02:07 PM
3

Unattractive men with a chip on their shoulder are way more abusive than random hot men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/21 01:33 PM
141

I dated a guy like this and broke up with him about a month or two in. He actually recognized he was doing this and APOLOGIZED for this very specific thing after I broke up with him even though I had never mentioned it. He knew what he was doing!!!! For some reason he was unable or unwilling to ask me questions about myself, KNEW he was doing it, didn’t change but did apologize for it when I broke up with him. Maybe he thought there was a chance I would change my mind. I did not, lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/21 01:31 PM
7

Yup I came here to say this. Dating is way better in my 30’s because dipshits like these YouTube guys have filtered themselves out and my own screening process has filtered out the other types of obvious dipshits. At this point, by the time I actually meet up with someone, they are at minimum a quality human being. Doesn’t mean it will work out, but neither one of us are wasting our time and the dates are usually a pleasant experience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/21 08:18 PM
4

He is a garbage human and you can’t change the past you can only move forward. Good for you to get out of the adult industry and find your own financial independence. No matter how generous a man might be, if you date for money, you end up paying with your entire life. One step at a time, you’re moving in the right direction, you’re gonna look back on this point years from now and see how far you’ve come!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/21 08:11 PM
6

I just want to say that that it is a MILLION TIMES BETTER to be single on V Day than in a shitty relationship. Even a relationship that is teetering on the edge of maybe great maybe shitty. I am so grateful that I’m confident in my own self, that I love myself and the people in my life who I can trust 100%, and that I learned from the relationships that have ended over the years. I’m grateful they are part of my experience and I am grateful that they are OVER!!! Cheers to all the single women wh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/21 05:19 PM
11

I have a neighbor to does this too. I had a pleasant neighborly conversation with him when he first moved in and then he showed up at my apartment one night with wine and an n95 mask when they were really hard to get. For me this was a lesson in boundary setting. I thanked him for the items and I asked him to leave them on the floor. I did not invite him in of course. Outside he would try to pet my dog, I asked him not to and he stopped. When I see him outside now he tries to make conversation, …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/21 01:31 PM
36

So true. Without that experience, I would really love pet names. But sadly a man who uses pet names is always disappointing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/21 03:09 AM
1

You’re right 😡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 03:31 AM
27

I’ve fallen for the same thing, you’re not alone!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 06:57 AM
170

Just because a guy is ugly doesn’t make him nice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 06:26 AM
183

I feel like three different guys I was with tried to do that thing where they try to put it in as if it were an “accident” and I was like what the hell do you think I’m just not going to notice? One was a boyfriend for 2 years!!! Men are depraved.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 06:25 AM
3

Thank youuuu! That’s a great perspective so I don’t beat myself up for past mistakes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/21 05:53 PM
4

I’ll tell you one thing that a coworker told me. She said if you give him any attention at all, even to say “stay the hell away from me,” he will take that to mean that you still want him in your life. The reason she was so sure is that because she herself suffered from mental illness and that’s how she acted with the men in her own life. The only way forward is to block and delete, and engage the authorities if necessary. If for some reason he needs to be in your life in a certain category, lik…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/21 04:20 PM
3

I know you’re not supposed to judge a book by it’s cover, but when the cover is MARYLIN MANSON, what could you possibly be looking for inside there?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/21 11:39 AM
18

Ugh I had an ex like this the DEPRAVITY!!! He made 4X what I made, still split everything 50/50 and I was struggling to keep up. I was much younger, it was such a mistake. At least I said hard pass when he tried to get back together.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/21 11:33 AM
3

I thought that was her! Lol love when my worlds collide.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/21 11:30 AM
11

Wahhhh no free therapy or indentured servitude, boohooo. 😭
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/21 11:27 AM
13

Ok, sounds like you’ve done your research. I wish you best of luck on your journey and that you are able to find and build a loving and peaceful life, free from abuse, for both yourself and your future child.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/21 04:10 PM
10

Yes I agree. OP, I don’t know what’s going on behind closed doors, but I do want to make sure you know what your options are. Please at minimum do some research about freezing your eggs and Google Single Mother by Choice (they have a Reddit group but it’s not very active.) It’s very possible to do on your own, you have a lot of options actually at any age (including donor embryos if you can’t retrieve your own eggs) and even if you decide you don’t want to go that route - knowledge is power. Eve…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/21 02:45 PM
84

I feel like this should be reported to either Tik Tok or the police?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/21 04:50 AM
3

I’m so sorry to hear that. As much as it hurts, I do think ultimately it’s for the best. The only thing that’s worse than getting strung along and ghosted without even a date is actually dating this horrible man. She’s lucky she has you as her mom to show her the ropes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 12:31 AM
13

Ok so I’ve noticed guys doing this more and more in the last year or so. One pattern that I’ve noticed is these guys are all flakes. The thicker they lay it on in the beginning, the more frustrating their flakiness. I can’t quite put my finger on what connects the over the top compliments with the unreliable flakiness, but these guys are definitely not HVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/21 06:55 AM
4

Lol um I ove all those things especially the golden girls!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/21 06:49 AM
3

I was thinking about your post a lot today. I just opened the apps back up after a few months and swiped through everyone in my filters. Nope, there’s nobody right now. There was one guy I thought mayyyybe I’ll give him a chance and see what happens, but at this point I’m old enough to realize when I’m on the fence it’s a no.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/21 07:11 AM
3

Also I don’t think “pant liner” means what this guy thinks it means.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/21 07:01 AM
1

Lol abso-friggin-lutely
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/21 05:04 AM
13

Lol I was thinking never have I ever talked to a quality man who put “school of hard knocks” on their profile. Even when I was trying to give different kinds of guys a chance, the men who put this are SALTY about their own lack of education.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/21 02:14 AM
1

I hope she found herself a different doctor.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/21 11:37 PM
167

Yes this happened to me!!! I was confused about the guy because he had some good signs and then would do things like text me late at night asking to meet up and text me sexual stuff after just a few dates. So I said “hey I like you, but I can’t tell if you want to get to know me or if you just want to bang.” Well of course he denied it, but then still tried to get me back to his place???? Two days later he came to his senses and texted me that he thought we were looking for different things. Of …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/21 04:54 PM
36

As a woman who isn’t cheating, that feature could be useful! No more creepy guys finding me on FB and / or LinkedIn after I swipe left on them. Although I guess if everyone has this selected then nobody will be able to swipe on anybody.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/21 04:49 PM
15

Yeah everything about him is so weird. Like every text includes a second text that is like kind of a joke about the first one? I don’t understand it, but seems shady. Good on OP for ending it. Block and delete!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/21 05:21 AM
95

Yes and I realize it’s messed up, but in my experience a lot of times guys who say they’re liberal and / or “feminists” often don’t pay for dates and also don’t do chivalrous things like open the door for you, etc. In my experience, men who consider themselves conservative, and whose political views dont really line up with mine, more often than not pay for dinner without making a big deal of it and have really nice manners. It’s not the paying for the drinks that makes them misogynists. It’s ju…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 06:44 AM
30

You are so right about this. I remember one ex would just stay in bed until at least noon and at one point I just was like ok I’m not doing this, I would go to the gym, come home, shower, make food, eat, and then he would wake up. No more waiting on a man for anything. Lesson learned.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/21 10:20 PM
3

Greg and Amiira interviewed by Oprah about this book! Pretty good advice. I don’t know if it was ever on the show but I did listen to it on Oprah’s podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/oprahs-supersoul-conversations/id1264843400?i=1000464663162
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/21 10:11 PM
2

I’ve stopped including men in my social media. Maybe if it’s a wedding announcement, but that’s it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/21 06:37 AM
27

I read his book “It’s called a breakup because it’s broken” right after a breakup and I’d have to say it was sound advice. True it could have just been 2 words “no contact” didn’t really need to be a full book, but still I’m glad I read it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/21 06:33 AM
8

Idk what app you were on, or if it was even app, but you could report him for that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 08:33 PM
6

This guy seems gross, I don’t know why you or anyone else would want to be friends with him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 03:17 PM
23

I had a really good phone call with a guy from OLD, I was really excited about him. I looked up his # and found out he had lied about his age by 10 years. I blocked him and deleted the apps, about 3 months ago. I was just so over it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 03:01 AM
4

That’s what I was thinking. I don’t do random hookups, but I DEFINITELY wouldn’t accept money afterwards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 02:04 AM
15

That’s so sad. And also describes a few of my relationships in my 20’s. Thank Gd for growing and learning better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 06:28 AM
7

ABSOLUTELY!!! He even said “um can I ask why?!” I didn’t block immediately, because of our mutual friends, but he was blocked shortly thereafter.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 02:24 AM
12

The only appropriate response to this is to block!! Thank you low effort men for showing yourselves!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 02:23 AM
28

Geesh this reminds me of the dude I had been on 2 dates with (but knew through friends for years). He asked me to meet up with him and his friends at a bar about an hour from where I live. I said no thanks and he was flabbergasted. Drop low effort dudes and save yourself PLENTY of headaches!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 01:57 AM
30

I think porn is so messed up that the question of whether it’s cheating is like.... the least of porn’s issues.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/21 05:52 AM
25

Same. This is like my biggest memory as a kid. Although for some reason if NEVER hurt as bad when I was at the hairdresser. I think they did a better job washing / conditioning and they have better brushes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/01/21 04:42 PM
6

Hi! I was also a little girl with long knotty hair that hurt so much to brush. I never knew how to brush it. My mom didn’t know how to brush it (she used a soft brush that did NOT detangle). My sister did a good job brushing it for me every once in a while, starting with the ends and using water so it wouldn’t hurt so bad, but more often than not it just stayed knotty. Until I turned like 12 or 13, got a shorter haircut, and figured it out on my own. Thank you for your work helping the little gi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/01/21 04:40 PM
31

This guy is garbage, especially since he hid that he has kids. He reminds me of a random I chatted with on an app, who also tried hiding parts of his lifestyle. He didn’t list his job on the profile, so I asked about it and he said he was a professor but didn’t say where. So of course I asked where and then he tried changing the subject. So I asked again and it ALL CAME OUT. He has a kid in my city, but couldn’t get a job here so works in a different city and flies to see his kid every other wee…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/01/21 06:34 AM
173

I think these men have low self esteem. That’s why they cover their face with hair and make weird faces for the camera. They don’t think they’re attractive enough to just smile.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 05:38 PM
51

Ok this article is VERY confusing, but these are actually two different guys. Both are awful. The stay at home dad is the guy on the right who stole the podium - Adam Johnson, from Florida. The guy on the left has the highly respected job of OUT OF WORK ACTOR - Jake Angeli, from Arizona. Barf to both of them, I just clarify here because I had to read the article a few times to understand it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 11:19 PM
30

What is happening now? Is he turning himself into the police? This child is not safe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/21 10:41 PM
26

Yeah emoji use like that is a real turnoff for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/21 03:40 PM
53

Lol “let’s go to a field” 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/21 03:40 PM
11

Dirty dishes, video games, and beer? No, that’s a dude.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/21 11:49 AM
28

Yes I agree I hope OP immediately blocked and deleted!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 06:28 AM
46

I see you have mustaches already on your list, I would like to add all other facial hair aside from an acceptable well-groomed beard. Goatees and “flavor savors” just gross me out. Immediate swipe left if I see a letter U to replace the word “you.” Spelling and grammar must be on point, unless English isn’t his first language (although still doesn’t excuse the lazy “U”) If job and / or education is left blank If education is listed as “school of life” or the equivalent Profiles with only one pho…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 06:23 AM
7

Ok, the first time my friend told me about FDS I disagreed with the premise because I believed that men and women were fundamentally equal. Equally intelligent, emotional, capable, etc. Now, I no longer believe this. I think men, in general, are lacking in a lot of these areas. Of course not all men, but that is why you have to be ruthless about weeding out the LVM and only date the HVM. I just “get that” now in a way I didn’t understand before. I wasn’t coming from a bad place, just maybe a mor…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 02:39 AM
62

I genuinely don’t think love means the same thing for men. The men who have told me they’ll always love me, but also treat me like garbage, it doesn’t add up. And I definitely have stopped loving them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 02:33 AM
19

I think they think we might want to sleep with them? One guy broke up with me and then was like but... we don’t have to break up right away. I was like what the hell does that mean?? It meant he wanted one last bang, lol. WHY WOULD I WANT THAT?!?!?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/21 01:22 AM
22

I knew something was off!!! Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/21 03:47 PM
60

Omg!! I don’t know what they are doing?! They say women are so complicated, but it seems clear as day to me! If you tell me you don’t want to be in a relationship with me, then the relationship is over! What’s left to discuss?? I think they’re living in a fantasy where we would beg them not to leave us? Barf. And to be fair, I don’t use a breakup as some kind of manipulative tactic. I’ve never mentioned ending a relationship unless I actually wanted to end it. And I’ve never brought it up in a f…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/21 03:03 PM
35

You guys definitely had a stronger connection than I had with my ex, but I did love him with all my heart. Why would I want to be with someone that didn’t want to be with me? It was the most clear cut ending to a relationship! What was left for me to “fight” for? I think the guys are hoping we will just want them no matter what? Like... they were somehow lead to believe that some women will want you no matter what you do or say? Will hang on for dear life? I really don’t understand it, but clear…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/21 02:57 PM
36

Doesn’t work with me either. To be fair, communicating doesn’t really work for me either. When it gets to the point where I’m going silent, or considering going silent, or trying to figure out the best way to “communicate,” the relationship is usually over.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/21 01:39 PM
188

Omg I had an ex break up with me by telling me he had an “uncontrollable urge for freedom” so I asked him to put all his things in a bag and leave. I didn’t even cry in front of him. I just realized what was happening and I asked him to leave. I do remember he mentioned it would just be a “break” and he was doing this “for us” and I said “If you wanted to be with me, you’d be with me. If you’re leaving to fuck other bitches, it’s over for good.” A 2-year relationship ended in 10 minutes. YEARS L…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/21 01:34 PM
25

I don’t have the best experience with any of this. For me, silence doesn’t work, communicating also doesn’t work. Usually when it gets to this point when I’m trying to figure out how to handle something, the relationship is over. I’d like to figure out how to have a relationship where I can address an issue and we can work on it together, but in my experience (and I’m 37), that just has never ever ever happened. The good news is my relationships have become shorter over time - 3 years, 2 years, …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/21 01:23 PM
30

I have a friend (in the same group of friends) who I used to have the biggest crush on, but nothing ever came of it. We never even kissed. I used to PINE after this guy, but the more I got to know him, the more I realized - this is not a man I want to date. He’s really negative, grouchy, rude to service people, and into very kinky sexual stuff that is not at all in my wheelhouse. Over time, we kind of drifted apart as friends. Yesterday, he called me out of the blue. I was doing a few things at …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 07:46 PM
16

When I broke up with my ex in 2019, I listened to this song on repeat: “I can’t make you love me if you don’t.” By Bonnie Raitt. So good, so poignant, just straight and to the point. Sometimes you know something logically but it takes a piece of art to really get it to sink-in emotionally, and that’s what did it for me. Good luck with everything ♥️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 07:33 PM
7

Absolutely! I have no issue paying for myself on dates (and then, of course, never seeing the man again). It’s worth the tuition to learn he’s a LVM on date 1.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 11:19 PM
7

Filth
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 11:13 PM
2

Good for you! Just one point - you didn’t get dumped. You took out the trash. Bravo!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 11:09 PM
3

I have exes who are exes for a reason, but I do think they were vetted. I had one that I had paid $800 for a flight because I invited him to a wedding. Since he was my guest I paid. Before that trip, he had paid for my flight for other events / trips. We broke up before the trip, and I couldn’t get a refund on the flight, so he Venmo’d me $800. I didn’t even ask him for it. Again, still an ex. Haven’t spoken to him in years. But I think he was properly vetted in the early dating stages as NOT a …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 04:53 PM
7

Oh!!! Maybe! I just googled it. Idk. I’m worried. I guess all we can do is shine our own light and hope for the best for the women who need it. I definitely will not allow a friend of mine to call themselves a brat in my presence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 04:48 PM
11

“I’m a spoiled brat” “I’m looking for someone to put me in my place.” WTF I have NEVER said or even thought this and no woman I know has ever said this about themselves in my presence, however I have a guy friend who is dating on the apps and he says he sees women put stuff like this on their profiles all the time. That they are looking for a man to “call them out on their bullshit” He told me he went on a date with a girl once, went back to her place, she didn’t want to sleep with him so no pro…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 04:36 PM
33

Not one text to an ex was sent since this pandemic started!! One DM received and ignored. Just have to brag about this here because it’s not like I can send an announcement about it, but I want to!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 04:26 PM
4

Lol I don’t know what’s worse. It’s a lot easier to end something when there’s no sexual chemistry. But also... dear lord do I miss sexual chemistry!!!! Either way, we both did the right thing. Good for us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 04:39 AM
66

Someone on here wrote a great post once. “If you settle, you’ll get less than what you’re settling for.” That resonates with me so hard. There was a guy I was dating for a bit who, I was really trying to make myself get into, but I just wasn’t into him. He seemed so sweet and thoughtful. Planned a few great dates, got me flowers. It was refreshing. But I just wasn’t sexually attracted to him. I still wanted to give him a chance so I kept on seeing him and then at some point he expected me to pla…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/12/20 03:21 PM
8

I’ve dated a few single Dads and I think they’re just like the other men I date, except they have less free time. Some of them are awful, some of them are fine. I’ve been ghosted by a single Dad, and in a different relationship with a different single Dad I was the one too end it. One single Dad just wanted to hook up and have fun, another was ready to get serious very quickly and told me he wanted to “love me when I’m 90.” I will say, in general, they do seem more emotionally available than guy…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/20 05:33 PM
26

He seems very thoughtful, congratulations!! Thanks for sharing :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/20 05:23 PM
27

Absolutely. I got off the pill when I turned 30, and I’ve had 3 boyfriends since then. They weren’t perfect guys, but they never had an issue with wearing condoms every time we had sex, and they never once tried to convince me to take a pill.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/20 05:21 PM
13

Because they are lazy and cheap.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/20 02:55 AM
22

Idk not in my circle. My single friends and I have been single this whole time. I think the men I’ve dated in the past are either blocked or are decent enough not to poke around just because they’re bored. Aside from one man I dated 15 YEARS AGO who is now married with kids tried DM’ing me, but I just ignored. I actually don’t personally know any pandemic relationships that are still going strong. There were a few at the start, but they fizzled quickly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/20 11:02 AM
11

Well, to be fair, she didn’t get picked at first. First he picked his WIFE for a season. And then he left the wife and picked her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/20 10:56 AM
29

Sometimes “mom humor” is just masochistic and it makes me sad. Like “hahaha I’m so miserable I drink a bottle of wine every night to forget my pain haha more wine please! Kids are in bed, it’s wine o’clock!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/20 10:53 AM
25

Yes I see the error of my ways. I’ve just dated too many passive men who aren’t really capable of actively making decisions in their lives, planning, etc. I didn’t realize the root of the vocabulary. I won’t use that word again. Thanks for the feedback :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/20 10:40 PM
9

Thank you! I see now. I definitely did non mean to invoke the incel community (barf). Just something I noticed about passive men who can’t take initiative. I do have the feeling it’s linked to their hormones, because I have a (gay, male) friend who is taking testosterone supplements, but I absolutely hereby revoke “b*ta” from my vocabulary!!! Thank you for your help!! ETA more info about my friend who is taking supplements, it has nothing to do with him being gay. I just am closer to him than I …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/20 10:38 PM
123

In my experience, when a guy acts like this it’s because he doesn’t want to be in the relationship anymore, but for whatever reason doesn’t want to take the initiative to end it. So he treats you like garbage until you pull the plug. Passive beta males, I think they’re low on testosterone actually.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/20 04:27 PM
9

Good for you!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/20 05:30 AM
127

I’m realizing if a guy disappears because he’s going through a rough time, or dealing with problems in his own life, he is DOING ME A FAVOR. The last thing I need is a “project” like my last boyfriend, who kept on dating me but turned into a shell of a man and blamed it on the stuff going on in his life. Legitimate stuff, but at some point if you can’t be in a relationship and also deal with the stuff in your life, then you need to not be in a relationship. Ok thanks for listening to my Ted Talk…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/20 05:29 AM
3

Good for you! I can’t date someone who doesn’t value honesty as a virtue. Life is hard enough, I’m not going knowingly add a liar into my life and make it that much harder on myself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/20 05:18 AM
3

“If you marry for money, you’ll pay with the rest of your life.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/20 07:02 AM
10

That’s actually a great idea.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/20 06:55 AM
42

I had a similar “that’s it, I’m done!” moment about 6 weeks ago, when I found out a guy I had been talking to lied about his age by 10 years. I just... could not handle talking to any men anymore after that. It’s good to take a break.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/20 06:53 AM
34

I did tell a boyfriend once that I would be his “emotional support human.” I thought it would bring us closer together. BOY WAS I WRONG!!!! We are never close at all!!! I was just trying to martyr my damn self. Lesson learned.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/20 02:27 PM
12

My doctor told me only to get sperm from men under 30 💅
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/20 02:15 AM
6

I did notice one time around April / May, I was buying something and the cashier’s hand accidentally brushed mine and it felt ELECTRIC!!!! I realized I hadn’t touched a human in months at that point. However, the upside is that I have my dog and she’s super cuddly and very sweet. ♥️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 06:30 AM
13

One time I was on an app and talking to a guy and he told me that THAT DAY he was driving and saw a man get killed by a hit and run. We already had plans to hang, but I told him he needed to speak with a therapist and maybe take some time off. Of course I felt bad for the guy, but this is dating not therapy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 06:23 AM
16

Lol that’s exactly what I was thinking.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 06:20 AM
14

Lol reminds me of a 2 hour phone call with a dude who asked me like zero questions about myself and just kept yapping and yapping and yapping all about his own life. I should have ended it sooner, but like a lot of us I’ve been conditioned to be “polite.” I’m growing out of it, lol. I blocked him right after that call and I think he tried messaging me from a few other apps and it was just a big ol block fest. No thanks!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 06:16 AM
72

Lol this is hilarious. I definitely fit in this demographic and I block quickly and easily when I notice any odd behavior. It’s not a game either - I genuinely DO NOT CARE about these men and their weird games. I’m glad to know this is a thing!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 05:53 AM
3

Good for you!!! You’ll make a great Doctor :) I know for sure I’m getting stronger at pointing out sexism like this, but still it’s hard sometimes when it’s a 1-on-1 situation and I feel like maybe I’m “bEiNg CrAzY.” F that. I’m doubling down on my intuition from now on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/20 05:36 PM
3

I’ve dated some shit men, but none of them have ever told me to shut up. Level up, sis!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/20 04:25 PM
15

UGH I was on a date with a guy a few months ago and he brought this up. Said she wasn’t really a doctor and that it’s weird she “insists” other people call her doctor. I asked him if he called his college professors doctor and would he be saying the same thing about a man. I feel so validated now that we are all talking about it, and less guilty about the fact that I ghosted him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/20 04:19 PM
1

Lol I gotta hand it to my grandparents sisters, who I spoke with before they passed away, and were both super supportive of me being single in my 30’s. They were like - good for you!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/12/20 03:18 PM
5

UnDerStaND sARcAsm 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 05:47 AM
3

This kind of has those weird online dating profile vibes where guys are like “swipe left if you don’t give head on the first date” or something like that. Like... why is she posting on a sub if she doesn’t want replies? All very weird.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 01:36 PM
3

I feel like this is a lie. The guy is testing out content for a new book or something like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 12:57 PM
9

Yup. Get out now. You’re young and have the rest of your life ahead of you. One step at a time, one foot in front of the other, and just keep going.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 12:53 PM
30

This is not my generation I’m older than this so the men my age who I date aren’t typically on these apps, but I can’t help feeling sad for young women at this age. So much porn, distraction, and now manipulation like this just for clout? So damn depressing. I hope the woman in this video finds FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 12:47 PM
2

I was thinking maybe the guy is special needs, and was starting to feel bad for him, but then I saw your comment about PUA and you’re right. Ugh these LVM!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 12:40 PM
6

I’m grateful the commenters all agreed YTA. I never know what I’m going to find on Reddit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 12:36 PM
118

Lol I once watched my ex literally knock down a child by walking directly into him without noticing. The mom was there and “apologized” in that way that’s not really apologizing but saying “I’m sorry” in a way that’s supposed to mean “you should be sorry.” And he just said “oh that’s ok” and kept on walking, having no idea what she was talking about and that he had just knocked over a child.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/12/20 01:17 PM
14

There is some weird psycho stuff that I can’t quite put my finger on but, I’ve started to notice a pattern. When a guy compliments you, in general, that’s good! But sometimes when a guy compliments you like too intensely, it’s actually a bad sign. Like when they compliment you in a certain self-depreciating kind of way. That’s like “you are way too good to be with a schlump like me.” That’s a bad sign. It’s really hard to put my finger on it, but I know it when I see it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/12/20 03:55 AM
9

In lock down with a lot of stuff closed, one guy picked me up, brought me flowers, and we went to a drive in movie and he had set up the trunk of his car like a little picnic it was very pretty and well thought out. Also, a friend of mine who is a guy, is taking a girl on one of those boats where you paddle with your feet. I also love ice skating dates in the winter, but I think that’s all shut down right now. Also, to be clear, one good date doesn’t make anyone a HVM!!!! It’s just a good start.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 03:13 PM
47

This is so hard for me because there are a lot of times that I don’t want to something non-dating related, and then I do it anyway and I have a great time. It’s hard for me to separate that out in my gut, is it like one of those things or is it because I’m not into the guy? What helps is if I imagine myself making out with the guy and I get a little grossed out by it then I know for sure to cancel the date, lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/20 04:58 PM
15

Good call. I was going to say “you should report this guy” but now that I realize it’s an ex girlfriend who created this, keep it up!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/20 04:06 AM
6

I’ve met men that have turned into long term relationships from Coffee meets bagel and The League. I’ve had medium - term relationships with men I’ve met on Hinge. There’s garbage on all of them, but these apps don’t have the same hookup implication that Tinder does.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/20 09:42 PM
82

I don’t think Tinder is a good idea for any woman. If you’re going on an app, there are other ones that aren’t focused on random hookups. UNLESS that’s what you are genuinely looking for.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/20 07:24 AM
3

I can’t remember the last time I said or heard this word. I don’t really have people in my life who speak like this and I’m realizing now how lucky I am ♥️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 03:16 AM
8

Yup I was thinking the same thing. I’ve been in this exact situation and just went with it because I “felt bad” or... I don’t even know. Whatever. Never again. This is how we learn. Kudos to OP for cutting her losses!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 04:30 AM
60

Lol there’s this comedian Eliza Skinner, I just listened to her comedy album, she has a joke about this. “People make fun of cat ladies, but you know who does not care at all about what you think? Cat ladies!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 04:22 PM
1

Ugh and they expect you to pay AND drive. Still, I love the earnest ones who really care about trying to make the world a better place. I just wish they wouldn’t try to one-up me on liberal-ness and pick me up for a date instead!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 06:54 AM
19

Also, again - hate to be cynical, but he really wants to marry her and.... what? He kind of needs to act on that, no?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 06:46 AM
2

Ohhhh I think it might be because of the election actually. The news talked about “college educated women” a lot because of the way they (we) were voting. Either way it’s rude and good for you to extricate yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 11:21 PM
22

You know what you do? Take pride in the fact that you found out about this and ended things immediately. The reason he was treating you so great was because he was trying to hook you in because he knew any normal woman would bolt when she finds out about the sex offender registry. And absolutely no, there is absolutely NO way to explain that away. He’s on it because he’s guilty. He tried to create a mirage and thank Gd you found out and walked away. Take pride in yourself that you walked away an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 05:19 AM
5

It doesn’t matter why. These aren’t men we would be interested in anyway. Act like they don’t exist because they don’t.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 05:09 AM
16

If he can’t replace a TP roll, I guarantee you he’s not spending HUNDREDS OF HOURS on your relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 01:58 PM
22

Lol a few years ago a guy sent me something a few days (or weeks, I don’t really remember) after a first date like “I’m bummed I haven’t heard from you :(“ It was so weird. I did allow myself the indulgence of responding “you didn’t hear from me because I didn’t have a good time.” To which he tried to DEBATE ME on whether I had a good time. No dude, whatever weird passive aggressive pick up artist garbage you’re trying to pull - just, no.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 01:48 PM
22

He was trying to “neg” her which is a manipulative tactic to insult a woman to make her work for your approval. I HOPE she just unmatched / blocked. That’s the only way to respond.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 03:35 PM
12

I just did an online speed dating and I don’t think I’m the most beautiful woman in the world, but these men.... holy hell they were just, not the kind of guys we are trying to date. They were mostly really nice, so I don’t want to be mean, but looks-wise I think these are the type of men that the Redditors would say are “average” and we should date. No thank you, I’ll hang out with my friends and my dog. Also it bothers me that MGTOW aren’t just GOING THEIR OWN WAY!!! I would totally get it if …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 06:44 AM
7

I think bare minimum is also like a guy who is exhibiting high value traits early on, which is a positive sign, but it’s not a HVM (yet). For example, good for him that he planned the date and paid and all that stuff, but that doesn’t make him a HVM. 6 months in is he still organizing dates and being appreciative and respectful of your time? That’s how you’ll know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 04:50 AM
8

Lol might as well be a field!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 04:28 AM
23

You should be proud if yourself that you didn’t join the MLM! We all make mistakes, but it sounds like you turned it into a funny story and a good lesson. Kudos to you!! Not the clown anymore!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 08:15 AM
36

Yes! This! I just had to apply it with my Mom, tbh. We are socially conditioned to keep everyone comfortable by saying yes or making up an excuse but simply saying “no” “no thank you” or “I’d rather not” is a fantastic muscle to build and the more we use it the stronger it gets!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 10:38 PM
6

I have an ex who used to lie a lot for absolutely no reason. Little every day things that were just so obviously lies, and I just got used to it. I was young and dumb. Anyway, one of the lies was about how he had lost his virginity with a woman who looked like an actress on a random tv show in a car. He told that to me and then he told it, randomly, to a friend of mine. My friend was like “he’s totally lying.” Idk something about the story she thought was a lie. Years later when we broke up he a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 03:13 AM
40

When I was new to Reddit and more naive I was surprised at how many comments on dating subreddits are men complaining they never get any matches and when the 1 in a million times they got matches, the women didn’t speak to them. It didn’t make sense to me, because the men I know never complain about that. Sure, there are flakes, but I’ve never heard a man in the real world tell me he gets ZERO MATCHES. This includes friends, family members, men that I’ve dated, etc. Then I realized .... when I’m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 05:28 AM
22

I deleted all the apps so I can have a clean slate. This last batch of men I was talking to were all super shady. I’d like to pat myself on the back for trusting my gut and vetting these men. 2 lied about their age, one lied by 10 years! 1 guy had a super shady living situation that he only revealed piece by piece and I had to drag it out of him. And a 4th guy was fine but just not a smart guy that would elevate or add to my life in any way. Credit where credit is due, the first 2 guys I googled…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 06:39 AM
20

You are absolutely lovable. There’s light on the other side. Cut the cord, clean the slate, and don’t look back. Sadly, it’s a very common theme among men that instead of breaking up with a woman they just act like total garbage so that she breaks up with them instead. I find it comforting once I realized that it’s happened to me on more than one occasion and to know I’m not the only one who has been through it. This, too, shall pass!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 06:32 AM
17

Omg I had no idea! Thanks for sharing but also ewwwwwww. They smartly time it with the month they all grow mustaches for “Movember” so I assume that means women wouldn’t want to be with them anyway for at least that month.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 06:29 AM
1

Settings -> block and privacy settings -> turn of messaging. Unless it’s a function you enjoy using, I think it’s best to keep it turned off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 06:26 AM
48

This seems like the type of relationship where she threatens to leave and he pretends to care, but doesn’t. Then when she does leave, she sadly won’t have the satisfaction of him begging for her back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 06:17 AM
27

What does the guy’s comment mean “at the wrong month”? Is there like a certain month for video games?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 06:12 AM
10

I hope she leaves him. This guy is awful. Also, one detail that irks me is how he knows he’s so awful and “feels bad.” If I had a quarter for every time a dude knew he was doing something shitty but kept doing it and then told me afterwards that he “felt bad.” Fuck that shit. Get out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 05:57 AM
16

Lol I saw the original post of this and thought about you guys. I guess the silver lining is the most upvoted comment is someone telling her to leave him unless she can be happy with her relationship being like this forever. It’s been a long time since I’ve allowed a man to treat me like this, but oh boy does it bring me back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 12:09 AM
59

Omg a LVM called me tonight!!! Flaked on me weeks ago and hadn’t heard from him since. Blocked. Blockity block block block.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/20 05:13 AM
6

Ugh an ex was once 2 hours late in picking me up and then when I was pissed, he blamed me for not checking in on him. And then he denied blaming me, because he did it in a passive aggressive way so he was able to deny doing it all together. It was so passive aggressive and weird. He’s an ex for a reason!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/20 02:24 AM
45

Dunno who James Fell is, but I like his reply! Lol thanks Mr Historian.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/20 03:57 PM
14

We are like hamsters on a treadmill and they are dangling this carrot of understanding in front of us if only we could communicate in just the perfect way, at the right time.... nope!! He’s not stupid he’s just playing dumb.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/20 03:56 PM
30

I have an ex who broke up with me completely out of the blue after 2 years together, then tried to get back together 3 years after that, and got mad when I told him no! “I never cheated on you!” He reminded me. If that’s the best thing you can say about your participation in our relationship, thanks but no thanks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 04:26 PM
3

Ew the word “nut” in this context is gross blech
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 06:22 AM
5

You’re welcome!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 06:19 AM
2

You’re right I mean any time someone describes their relationship as “not abusives”.... that means it’s pretty bad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 06:19 AM
13

It’s in the settings menu, account settings, click on your account, and then you can toggle off “accept chat requests” and “accept Direct messages.” Life is so much better with those turned off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 06:17 AM
3

Ok, so I might be misreading this, but it seems to me that she wants to have another kid with this dude and then leave him. Bc she wants the kid and she already has one kid with him and he’s already a “good dad” (doubtful but ok that’s what she says.) I don’t think she actually cares about salvaging her relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 06:11 AM
16

I got the weirdest message once about not leaving the house without a bra bc it’s colder than I think... the guys are weird anyway, I turned off my DM’s so that’s not an issue anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 06:08 AM
50

Ugh of course the first comment I see is “your head is huge.” Confident woman = totally unacceptable to scrotes
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 06:03 AM
15

If the lies start on day 1, that’s not a good sign.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/10/20 03:02 AM
101

The trash took itself out!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 12:13 PM
31

Yup! It’s reversed for me too. I used to never care if a guy had a job or what. Now if the profile doesn’t have his job AND education listed, I swipe left.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 01:55 AM
3

I haven’t seen it, but my ex reminds me of him so I’m not surprised.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/20 01:58 PM
3

Yes you are so right!!! They deflect. I’ve experienced that first hand. It’s so funny to understand this in hindsight. At the time it was just so confusing, and frustrating. Walking away was the right choice, really the only choice, and I’m so happy I did.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/20 01:56 PM
1

I don’t feel anything, because once they’re my ex they’re out of my life and I’m out of theirs. It doesn’t matter if they change, they weren’t the man I wanted / needed when I was with them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/20 04:04 AM
51

Careful though, some LVM apologize as a manipulative tactic. They don’t listen to you at all, just immediately apologize so they can move on with their day.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/20 03:59 AM
55

I remember something similar happened to me when I was around 14 / 15 and playing Othello on yahoo games which is a simple little board game. Some pervy older dude kept trying to get me to talk about sex in the chat. I remember saying something along the lines of “um you realize I’m the same age as your babysitter, right?” And he said something like “in some societies older men teach younger women how to have sex” and I was like “uh, I’m not cool with talking about that.” And we finished up the …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/20 05:28 PM
5

A guy friend showed me a girl he matched with on Tinder and her profile said “looking for someone who calls me out on my shit.” What does that even mean?!?! I guess she is trying to get with guys like this one? My friend said he sees that a lot on women’s profiles. Something weird is going on in pick me land.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/20 11:02 AM
17

UGH Yes I’ve been in this scenario twice and this convo could have been with either of those exes. Not cheating, not lying, not being a monster, just garden variety LVM that I felt strongly bonded with and couldn’t leave, and they didn’t end it. I just had to experience the relationship wither away to nothingness, me trying to salvage, asking for help and not getting it. And their attitude of “if you’re ok with this, then that’s on you.” Luckily, the second time it happened, I realized it was ha…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 08:14 PM
59

Now that I have the gift of experience, it really is a trip thinking back on all my exes. Some of them I never think about and feel totally nothing when I think of them. Some still make me so angry and/or disgusted! And it’s not about how long the relationship lasted or how recent it was either. Some men just pissed me off lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 01:57 PM
23

He wants the nudes to show his friends. Garbage. Block block block!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 08:47 PM
82

I watched a documentary about the porn industry called “Hot girls wanted,” and sadly there is a whole genre devoted to this. The purpose of the genre is to degrade the women and make them throw up. They lure in teenage girls from rural areas, start by grooming them online before they’re even 18, then when they’re 18 get them on a flight to Florida. The first porn they do is “vanilla,” and then they have to do more damaging stuff. They had one girl who was 24, I think they called her the “grandma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 02:50 PM
67

This is how I feel especially about the location of the date. If he proposes that you drive across town to a restaurant near him, or meet him half way, it’s a really bad sign. I don’t think we are trying to turn LVM into HVM, I think we are trying to find the ones who are HVM already.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 02:44 PM
7

This reminds me of a conversation I had with a colleague. He’s mid 40’s, dating a woman in her early 20’s. She didn’t have a job and he was complaining that he had to pay for everything and basically take care of everything for her. I asked him why he wasn’t dating a woman closer to his own age and he said he didn’t want to date a woman who had children. I told him “Well, you’re dating someone half your age. So instead of dating a woman with a child, you’re just dating a child.” He was speechles…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 07:04 AM
7

Love this show and this character!! I saved a video on my phone where her son calls his ex gf crazy and she says “She’s not crazy. You treated her like shit so she was driven crazy.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 01:51 AM
43

I’ve been on several dates with men who complain about paying for things for women, but then also show off their really nice cars. Like.... what are you trying to accomplish? And why are you complaining to me, a woman you are on a date with, about this? These men have issues they need to deal with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 03:25 AM
6

Lol this is my ex. Exact age and everything. Thank you for the reminder.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 10:55 PM
20

Why would anyone swipe on this? Probably he’s only getting cam girls and bots, and then complaining “the apps are just full of cam girls and bots.” What a limited life he has created for himself!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 04:06 AM
3

I realized this when I tried speed dating! It seemed like a fun thing to do, but not helpful at all to meet someone for this exact reason!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 12:02 PM
14

Why do they do this??? A guy I went on a few dates with 15 years ago slid into my DM’s. Haven’t talked to him in 5 years or more. He’s married with kids! I would not want my husband DMing women he went out with in the past for no reason at all. I just ignored it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 12:00 PM
6

My motto is “I’m not getting paid to entertain you.” My natural instinct is to fill in awkward pauses, keep the flow of the conversation going, etc. I’ve had to stop myself! I ask a few questions, but if I notice the guy isn’t asking me any questions then I just stop. Let it be awkward. Let him figure it out. One guy I dated was a nice guy, but just really bad at that. I ended things w him bc there just wasn’t a spark between us, and he even apologized for it! He was like “I’m sorry I talked abo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 11:51 AM
7

I did! I was on the pill throughout my 20’s. I got off when I turned 30 and have been off now for 7 years. For me, the big issue was my acne medicine that I had to also stop taking. The first year off the pill was rough when it came to acne. However, I went to a new dermatologist and explained I didn’t want to take any oral medication just topical, and together we figured it out. My skin isn’t perfect, but I’ve got a routine that works and I feel proud that I took my health into my own hands! I’…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 11:39 AM
4

OMG talked to some guy on an app who told me in 3 minutes that he has asthma and is only doing virtual dating. I was like “I’m sorry to hear that.” His response “Me too.” That’s it? Like... I’m supposed to build a conversation around that? “Awwww poor baby, let me entertain you and leave food at your doorstep.” I wanted to let him know that if he plans to date virtually, he’ll need to learn how to have conversations virtually. But, I just blocked instead. Btw - I don’t unmatch anymore, I block w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 02:33 AM
30

First of all - good on you for turning that into a lovely evening for one!!! This was such a stupid move on his part for many reasons, including the possibility that your paths might cross again!!! I’ve run into so many guys from the apps in real life in social and professional settings. Why treat someone like this and burn a bridge this bad? Makes no sense!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 08:42 AM
3

Why is it when a man is calling you “beautiful” and “gorgeous” as a nickname, it’s usually when he’s treating you the worst?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 11:53 PM
1

Consider this a challenge. Working on your boundaries like strengthening a muscle at the gym. He asks you out and you say “No thanks, I’d rather not.” That’s it. No explanation needed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 04:40 AM
4

Meditation, yoga, and walking. This combo reduced my stressed, which reduced my munching and snacking, and also side benefit totally cleared up my skin too. I also work out for strength and cardio, but I think the meditation / yoga / walking combo made a bigger difference.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 04:36 AM
4

He’s gross stay away!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 04:30 AM
1

That’s a good idea. I actually ask guys to use the call function in the app until I am convinced he’s a real human and not a psycho. This guy did not pass that hurdle, lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 12:59 AM
7

When I was deciding to breakup w my ex, I listened to “I can’t make you love me if you don’t” by Bonnie Rait a lot
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 06:01 AM
21

Just blocked today!! Really strange experience in the morning a dude matched and immediately wanted to hang out right away today. I was like “I’m working, but would be happy to have a phone call later when I’m done with work.” So then he called me immediately, and I messaged back that I couldn’t talk because - again, as I had just told him - I’m working, but I’d be available after work. Then he unmatched me. So weird! Then an hour later he requests me as a connection on LinkedIn. BLOCK. Then ton…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 05:50 AM
6

TL:DR truth and honesty mean absolutely nothing to me! Garbage man, thanks for clarifying that up front!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 06:19 PM
11

Maybe his penis was so small all he could do was hug?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/20 06:04 AM
11

Men are weirdly obsessed with women’s weight.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 11:55 AM
100

These are good! One more I’ve seen - he insults himself, in kind of a funny jokey way. If a man hates himself, and you date him, he’s gonna hate you too for being with a guy he hates so much.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 11:29 AM
5

There is some kind of weird victim fantasy the men of reddit seem to love to play instead of owning up to their own shortcomings. On the Bumble sub, anytime anyone posts anything, the most upvoted response is “you get matches?” Like ok dude, if you’re not getting matches, look in the mirror.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 11:18 AM
21

There’s so much wrong with this. Complaining about another woman on your dating profile?? No wonder why she left.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 04:57 AM
14

Yes, and it was the beginning of the end. But one of those signs that is too subtle to breakup over, and when I brought it up he made me feel like I was being overly dramatic. I guess that could be considered a “micro aggression”?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 05:18 PM
22

Haha it’s like a movie where the bad guy tells the hero his plan before he kills them, but messes up killing them so the hero knows exactly what his plan is and can foil it. But, seriously, I think this guy is missing a piece of his brain.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 05:10 PM
2

You did the right thing! You tried to communicate and message not received. All you can do after that is end it, unless you enjoy dating a brick wall. Same thing happened to me. We tried our best!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 12:38 AM
11

UGH I UNDERSTAND. Society teaches us to lift our men up, and we are good people, so we do, but we forget to ask - do the men in our lives lift us up to? If not, then cut them lose. No more holding out for things to get better at a later date. I’ve learned from my past and am not taking on any more charity cases in my romantic life!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 12:29 AM
60

I had an ex call me to apologize a few years ago. In my religion, there’s a holiday where you’re supposed to apologize to everyone who you’ve wronged that year. Ex apologized because I was so helpful to him during our relationship, and he broke up with me as soon as his life got better and didn’t need me anymore. By coincidence, I was having coffee w my religious leader a few days later and told him about it. He said the apology wasn’t good enough. EVEN MY RELIGIOUS LEADER WHO IS SUPPOSED TO PRE…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 05:49 PM
4

I hope you take comfort in knowing you’re not the only one. And now that we know, we won’t put up with garbage like this anymore!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 10:45 PM
47

That look... when I’ve mustered all my courage, dug deep, identified my most important needs and deepest emotions, written it all out dozens of times, found the perfect moment to tell the dude and then.... nothing. Dead eye stare back at me. Absolutely nothing going on behind them. Not even an attempt to understand. Never again. ✌️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 04:54 PM
43

Omg this is so satisfying. Thank you so much for sharing!!! I’m so living vicariously through you right now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 04:43 PM
10

Why would anyone want to turn on push notifications to see that garbage?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 12:22 PM
2

Not.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 03:12 AM
63

YES lady!!! This reminds me when I went on vacation w my bf at the time (ex now). We split everything 50/50, I was fine with it at the time it didn’t even occur to me that he might pay for anything. Except one time we met a lady who took our picture for us, and assumed he was paying for the trip. She said something like “wow this is such an incredible trip to take your girlfriend on.” Uh NO I took MYSELF on that trip. It blew my mind that anyone would think that he was paying. Then years later a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 05:45 PM
2

Lol exactly, I have learned the error of my ways!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 06:33 PM
5

OMG! A loooong time ago (like 12 - 15 years ago) I bought a guy a video game bc I wanted to play it with him. That jerk played the game without me and finished it in like one week on his own. I was such a damn clown. Took me 8 or 9 months to get dumped by him. Ughhhh never again. AND he couldn’t cum during sex, he never looked into why but I can only imagine a porn addiction. Wtf why was I even with him?! No idea. Not like he had a sparkling personality!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 03:23 PM
44

Omg “I didn’t meant to offend you” WHY do they always say this after they say some really offensive thing??? My “offense” isn’t the issue, bud.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 04:54 AM
1

No, he was inconsiderate and rude. Didn’t even apologize. You are not too harsh, you’re actually being nice by replying at all. I think you should keep track of which friends told you this is too harsh and stop asking them for advice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/20 05:38 AM
25

In some ways I’m grateful for my short stint dating a sociopath. It is kind of like getting a little bit of the flu as a vaccine for the flu. I can spot this garbage so much easier now and peace out!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/20 07:08 PM
293

OMG I dated a man (twice over the course of 2 months) who said this exact thing!!!!! Asked for nudes as a way to show I trusted him!!!! Then his buddy told me he keeps a collection. What a manipulative creep.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/20 02:06 PM
21

UGH guys who ask for tit picks 99% have a collection of them and show to all their friends. I went on TWO dates with a friend of a friend. Since we had mutual friends in common, I assumed he wouldn’t be a scumbag. Then he told me if I wanted to take our relationship to the next level that I had to take a “leap of faith” and the only way he could know that I trusted him would be to send him tit pics. Of course I didn’t, because I’m a grown ass woman and I don’t do that shit. I told our mutual fri…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/20 02:02 AM
1

Your ex is an asshole. Implants are perfectly normal, lots of women have them, and I bet you look great. Any man who gets close enough to you to see the scars should feel so happy, he would never put you down. If a man insults other women, including women who elect to get plastic surgery, he’s a LVM. Next. Read the advice on FDS about finding a HVM and STOP sleeping with LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/20 02:04 PM
2

“It’s called a breakup bc it’s broken” was so helpful for me. I was dumped, heartbroken, blindsided and gaslit. I read that book and it squashed any notions I had of staying in touch w the guy. I will forever be indebted to that book. It kept me on the right path.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/20 06:56 AM
3

Yes! And when we tell people this, they think we’re the crazy ones bc we are the ones informing them of this behavior. Believe women!!!!! I’m so happy I found this sub.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/20 12:31 PM
29

I think the reason it’s so hard for non-FDS members to understand this sub is because it’s SO HARD for rational people to understand male audacity. I tell friends what I have experienced in dating and they say “no, that’s not happening, you’re crazy.” Guess what, it’s happening! I’m glad I found this sub. Sorry the rest of reddit doesn’t understand, but their loss I guess.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/20 10:00 PM
25

Good call, I just created this account so I can post only here and nobody can use my post history to stalk. F that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/20 01:59 AM
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