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honeybadgerattitude Archive

View 14 posts and 563 comments by honeybadgerattitude on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
724

MALE DEPRAVITYhoneybadgerattitude/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 12:14 PM
528

FDS MEMEShoneybadgerattitude/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 02:14 AM
449

TRIGGER WARNINGhoneybadgerattitude/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 10:35 AM
295

MINDSET SHIFThoneybadgerattitude/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 11:30 AM
233

honeybadgerattitude/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/21 04:43 PM
200

TRIGGER WARNINGhoneybadgerattitude/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 08:35 AM
199

FDS MEMEShoneybadgerattitude/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 01:02 AM
188

STAY WOKEhoneybadgerattitude/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 01:26 PM
151

FDS HUMORhoneybadgerattitude/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 11:47 AM
92

How-To High Valuehoneybadgerattitude/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 10:25 AM
38

QUEEN SH*Thoneybadgerattitude/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 10:18 AM
37

FDS HUMORhoneybadgerattitude/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/21 08:16 AM
2

FDS MEMEShoneybadgerattitude/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 06:16 PM
1

THE AUDACITY OF SCROTEShoneybadgerattitude/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/21 09:42 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
96

Just imagine the flip side of this. If a woman bought her boyfriend a mankini, a car air freshener and padded boxers to make his d1ck look bigger! 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/22 01:31 AM
43

Took me a minute but I think it's Not Like Other Girls
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/22 06:53 AM
61

Remember that a lot of women go on that same journey and never have the realisations you've had. You should be proud of yourself. Well done!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/22 09:46 AM
62

Awesome. That laugh is amazing!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/22 12:28 PM
10

I went on a date with a guy who wore tracksuit bottoms for it. Suffice to say we didn't go out again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 07:37 AM
45

I agree with the other commenters here. Don't move in with him. Many men revert to their real selves once they have a woman in a situation they can't easily escape from. I think that's what your gut is telling you here. Move to Boston and live on your own if that's what you want. If you do move in with you it's possible he just wants a mommy bangmaid to keep him going until he finishes his PhD then he'd leave for someone else when he's got a higher social standing. Worse case is he'll baby trap …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/22 09:01 AM
84

Well that's completely horrifying!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/22 06:52 AM
75

I carry the cancer gene and had preventative surgery. It plunged me into a severe depression and his covert abuse tactics escalated to full on abuse of all kinds. It took me about 3 years to recover enough to kick him out. I was the breadwinner for years before that too, you'd think that would count for something but these scrotes just want everything handed to them. Important lesson learned. There are/were a lot of abusers in my family and I'm proud I'm the first woman to escape from it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/22 12:37 PM
34

I'm happy about it. It was a good way to see how much of a scrote he was so I could get rid of him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/22 12:00 PM
124

Even if they don't leave, so many will just become abusive assholes instead. Ask me how I know...SMDH
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/22 11:44 AM
240

What in the name of the holy goddess is wrong with these unfeeling scrotes!?!?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/22 10:48 AM
26

Ha ha. That's my ex. He's living with his parents since I threw him out and he's too "anxious" to get a job and support his children. He's a fckin joke!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/22 08:05 AM
13

It is in the comments and she says it's just him using it during his bathroom time. I'm in a house with 3 kids and we don't go through 2 rolls a day. You might be right still, I just can't see what else it could be.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 04:52 PM
14

It's very possible that you're right. I'm just wondering how he's using 2 rolls of toilet paper a day. He could just be flushing it to cover his tracks though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 04:37 PM
16

I'm so so sorry that you went through that. I know there's nothing I can say but massive hugs from an internet stranger. xxx
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 04:35 PM
44

Yup!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 12:56 PM
92

She doesn't even seem to be thinking of that as an option. It's really sad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 12:55 PM
236

When his daughter was under 1yo by the looks of it. Most comments were querying bowel problems but it wouldn't happen at the exact same time each day. Some said gambling addiction but that wouldn't explain the two rolls of toilet paper a day. Someone even suggested that he's making hundreds of origami swans and selling them online! But we all know what it really is. Also getting angry when she questions it says guilty conscience to me. I dread to think what he's doing at home all day while she's…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 12:30 PM
387

I get a bit fed up of the stories about scrotes being scrotes sometimes but this guy really takes the cake. She is "benefit of the doubt"-ing him to her own severe detriment. She says the marriage has been rocky for a while. She says he's going through two rolls of toilet paper a day!! And he takes his iPad in with him every time. Same thing, same time every day. She really needs to leave him but the comments are just saying get him to a Dr and cOmUnIcAtE. I wish there was an easier way to wake …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/22 12:19 PM
80

I had to look it up and I'm very glad to say that all the comments were telling her to put down the man and keep the horse! 🐎> 🧑‍🦲
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/22 10:57 PM
33

Pahahahaha! I jeffing love it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/22 03:19 PM
41

Me too!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/22 01:32 PM
3

I believe it's because they want to constantly remind us of their presence. This sub represents everything they hate so they do the only thing they know how. Abuse and intimidate. It's the same reason why they'll screenshot posts to put in other subs. They want to shut us down by trying to scare us out of existing as a group. Same with the downvoting. You can write a comment as innocuous as "I had a great salad yesterday" and they will still downvote because they don't think we should be allowed…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 08:18 AM
55

I wonder how many of the women in these ENM relationships don't actually want it but are coerced into it because that's his "kink"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/22 06:05 PM
70

Oh they gonna hate this! I'm sure they'll think individually that it doesn't apply to them then wonder why they've got a limp dck unless they're strngling a woman.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/22 06:07 PM
32

I came to it a different way. I was in an abusive relationship for years and it was actually a HVM that made me see the light. He didn't do anything other than be his HV self but I developed a crush on him and started to see the enormous differences between him and my NVM husband. It was only later that I stumbled on FDS from a link in another sub about these "crazy" women and found it made perfect sense to me. The difference is I was ready to wake up. Desperate for it in fact. It's only going t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/22 01:55 PM
64

It's definitely sinking in to our consciousness and I love it. I actually had a dream last night that I started dating a lovely HVM but I was surrounded by pickmes and their LVMs and they hated me and I didn't care. It was awesome.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/22 01:31 PM
15

Pahahahaha!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 07:19 PM
14

Maybe it's over compensation
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/22 07:15 PM
36

It is. You can tell from the year and the only name mentioned wrote a review of him in the NYT. I cross checked everything. Mentioned the debate with Hilary so that gives a time frame. Mentioned the famous sister. It all adds up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/22 06:51 PM
10

I've used Google and the information in the article to conclude exactly who it is now. Thanks sisters!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/22 03:34 PM
19

I really want to know who it is too. I've been googling like crazy trying to figure it out but no luck yet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/22 01:30 PM
22

Thank you!! I never said anything about rent or kicking them out. Just that it's their mess and I won't be responsible for their cleaning once they're adults so they have to learn to do it now. I would never hold something like that over their heads. Especially after their abusive father actually made them put their shoes and coats on and stood them by the door telling them they would be kicked into the street if they didn't behave at age 5!! I'm actually very lenient with them because of that a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/22 11:05 PM
31

Yeah I'd never threaten to kick them out. Just don't get privalages like computer games until it's done. Pretty normal parenting strategy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/22 07:48 PM
439

Ha ha ha! I had this today with my boys. I told them to tidy their room and my youngest said I should be doing it because it's my house. I said: 1, it's your mess so you're tidying it. And 2, do you think I'm going to be coming to your house and tidying up after you when you're grown? Hell no! Childhood is adult training so you can learn to do it now. He did it. Kept trying to say it was finished but I kept checking and telling them more needed doing. I'm an evil mother! Witch cackle
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/22 04:36 PM
47

Wow!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 07:01 AM
1

This.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/22 09:11 PM
191

I know this feeling well! My stbx husband was a decent cook. I wasn't by his estimation. He'd cook a roast dinner every Sunday but I would dread it. He'd be drinking by 3pm, complaining about having to cook, complaining about cleaning up the mess he made but if I dared to suggest I help, or, goddess forbid, cook it myself, I would be berated for my uselessness. I was the breadwinner though. I think he used the cooking to make it seem like he was essential to the running of the household. He wasn…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/22 04:24 PM
93

This! All week and twice on Tuesdays
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/22 10:43 AM
7

I just keep thinking, how expensive was the goddamn cake?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/22 01:41 AM
2

Do you think it's mainly men that think it is a choice? Because straight women can choose to go without sex but if a straight man was desperate enough but only men were available they would have sex with a guy just to f*ck something?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/22 12:50 AM
45

Me too!! Women are beautiful. Just can't have sex with them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/22 09:35 PM
28

Difference: we know that there are different types of men or we wouldn't bother talking about dating them. We don't think all men are the same or that they think with a "hive mind". It's that simple.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/22 09:34 PM
16

Very well said
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/22 09:32 PM
36

This! All day and night plus weekends!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/22 09:30 PM
64

Please do that post!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/22 08:06 AM
171

His manly figure showed off the ginormous bulge in his trousers. It reminded her of what it might look like if a giraffe got a hippo stuck in its throat. As he walked past her, his butt shimmied from side to side like two hams swinging in a bag. He had large feet that would have fit easily in clown shoes and broad hands with long fingers reminiscent of the facehuggers in Aliens...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 05:02 PM
60

Bahahaha fooking brilliant!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 04:08 PM
56

Maybe mushy ass soap hair then it can just be abbreviated to MASH. Example: This guy sounds a bit MASH!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/22 07:07 AM
31

It's only a matter of time before he's strangling her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/22 07:03 AM
179

If he wasn't pornsick in the first place he wouldn't need the adrenaline to cum.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/01/22 06:56 PM
15

Ha ha ha! "Don't have a big mouth when all you've got is a worm" really made me chuckle
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/01/22 04:21 PM
3

Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/22 01:51 PM
42

That was a rollercoaster ride of a story! So many congratulations to you for your hard work and improving your life for yourself and your family. I have a lot of similarities in my story except I don’t think he cheated and he never worked. And I left him eventually but I took him back so many times first. I literally had to reprogram my brain out of loving him. He is a covert narcissist too and the cycle of pretending he was trying was exactly the same. I have 3 kids too and moved closer to fami…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/22 09:28 PM
4

Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/22 10:38 AM
23

Yeah I got the touching thing too! There’s such a thing as being “touched out”, especially if you’ve got kids and they’ve been climbing on you and demanding attention all day and you’ve just had enough and need to be left alone for a while. Then he’d get sulky because I was exhausted from it all and didn’t want him pawing at me. Then he’d get angry because he wanted to climb all over me and get attention too!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/22 10:34 AM
47

We couldn't because it would have confused and upset her, so she just ate with everyone else and he had to leave at mealtimes
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 06:27 PM
98

Entitlement and believing they own us. Eurgh!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 05:38 PM
61

He was. He would tell us she wanted seconds too and eat them as well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 05:36 PM
337

I’ve had it with my abusive ex and I just wanted to add in another facet of it. He told me once that he didn’t like the way I got out of the bath! It affected me at the time and it was definitely a neg but there was another factor that was he expected me to constantly present myself to him in the most attractive way possible. It didn’t matter that I was just living my life and never actually wanted him in the bathroom while I was getting out but because I was naked and muh penus needed to see it…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 02:14 PM
225

Yeah I agree. I’ll never forget this couple where I looked after the wife in a nursing home. We all thought it was so sweet that her husband would come and see her every day and sit with just her in the sun room while she had her meals. But she had dementia and was losing weight inexplicably then we eventually realised that HE WAS STEALING HER FOOD!!!!! He came in every day just to eat the food that was for her. So much for the cute elderly couple still in love!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 01:07 PM
88

I left my abusive husband in 2020 in the middle of the pandemic, despite being disabled and having 3 young kids. Last year I moved us all across the country to get even further away from him. We’re starting our new life in 2022 in peace and safety and surrounded by loving family.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 01:01 PM
154

There’s also the other side of the coin. With men who are very dependent on their wives/partners, it can often be an extra drain on a sick woman where she has to manage HIS emotions around HER illness. It’s hard enough going through something like breast cancer but many women will have to suspend their own feelings about it in order to keep the man calm and reassured. When it comes to emergency situations many men will just panic and it’s left to the woman to fix her own emergency while babying …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 12:21 PM
16

Pahahaha!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/22 04:10 PM
106

It’s weird how many subs on Reddit seem to be left leaning unless they’re full of men or talking about women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/22 03:12 PM
254

Omg! I had to find the other sub this was posted in to see what they were saying and the fact that many men seem to think the answer is to import women from Africa or Asia so they can get a virgin bangmaid mommy slave is unreal!! That that seems an easier option than actually trying to be a better person who would offer value to the woman in their life boggles the mind! And of course we get mentioned on there and apparently we’re all bitter closet lesbians. As if! We could go outside right now a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/22 01:14 PM
47

This might be a hot take but I think he’s trying to sleep with you. He might just be a friend but he’s trying to stay passive so you see him as a “nice guy” in the hope that one day you’ll consider him for sex. He wants you to be his mother. He has no spine, he wouldn’t ask you out directly but I’d put money on one of the times you’re exhausted from the mental load of caring for him and/or drunk and he’ll try to kiss you. Then if/when you say no, complain about always being nice to you as if tha…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 12:27 PM
46

I’ve had a look and it’s all pathetic. You have nothing to feel embarrassed about. They should be embarrassed for criticising you for wanting to get home safely late at night! I mean, how dare you want money to make sure you don’t get r*ped?!?!? I can’t believe they’re making threats over that but that kind of proves your point about wanting to be safe from these scrotes. Late night public transport out of a city is dangerous for any woman because of people like that. They will jump on any reaso…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 09:46 AM
58

Thanks. I realised after that all the women in my family are/were in abusive relationships. I’m the first one to actually get away.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 12:33 AM
131

Here we go: I'll try to keep it short but it was 17 years of abuse and manipulation and it's a good cautionary tale of why we should never stop vetting and protect our wombs at all costs. It's not always easy though. Met at university, he was just a couple of months from finishing but never completed. I now know he saw no need once he met me. I was a winning "lottery ticket" to him. Why make an effort when someone else can do it for you? Got lovebombed HARD! Got engaged early but stupidly long e…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 11:55 PM
45

Omfg!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 11:11 PM
12

And they don’t even put any effort into the one or two presents they DO buy. I get very annoyed that Santa is a man because I’m frigging Santa!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 05:26 PM
37

It sounds like he’s a misogynist tbh. You definitely shouldn’t apologise, you’ve done nothing wrong. He probably presumed that you were going to sort the drinks and you or his girlfriend would sort the food because that’s wOmEn’S wOrK. When he realised it was on him his only option was the shitty takeaway precisely because he doesn’t need to make any effort or accept responsibility for how it goes. Has he always been happy to let his partner do all the work in the past?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 01:48 PM
59

That perfect outfit for men who like to f*ck babies! 🤢🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/21 10:42 PM
6

I believe my stbx father in law is like that and the end result was producing 2 narcissistic and abusive children and one with severe trauma and anxiety. Unfortunately I married the narcissist one, with all the entitlement of a high powered working man but no jobs or money to back it up. Funny thing is, he lives with him since I kicked his ass out and they’re both reaping what they sowed! 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/21 03:01 PM
5

This!! 10000% this is actually what is going on here!! They don’t want to deal with him. I’m in the exact same boat. You need two people to want to reconcile. That’s you and your ex, not him and his goddamn mother!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/21 10:39 AM
26

Omg!! That’s horrific but also makes total sense. I’m not black or American but I see what woc go through because I make sure my eyes are open to it. Thanks so much for sharing this. I’m going to be watching a lot more of her videos now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/21 10:29 AM
11

Sounds about right
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/21 10:05 AM
7

I’ve spent my entire life being “othered” but it wasn’t until I read this post that I realised it has mainly been women who have done this to me. But I have learnt to deal with it over the years. It’s going to depend on individual personalities but I’m a nice person and I let people around me see that. I don’t let people walk all over me though, I’m firm with my boundaries but friendly overall. Just not too friendly. I’m a quiet and introverted person too and I like keeping my privacy in the wor…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/21 10:53 AM
504

That got me as well! Gross! 🤢🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/21 10:30 AM
134

Good post. I think a lot of us will fall into that trap because we often falsely believed that sharing a common trauma meant a deeper connection to a LVM. But in reality, we are empathising and projecting our feelings onto them. All too often the men are just looking for free therapy and access to regular sex. Instead of trying to cultivate a deeper understanding of each other, they use their experience to manipulate and gaslight their partner into accepting negative behaviours. They get away wi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/21 11:57 AM
72

He was into you from the start then. Even if it was just to feel like he could “steal” his brother’s girlfriend. It sounds like he was negging you and thought that you’d be sooo grateful for his positive attention finally once you were single. Glad it back fired on him! 😝
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/21 11:49 AM
-6

No no no no!!! I’ve actually met David Attenborough and he was lovely, if a bit grumpy! I don’t think for a minute that he’s a HVM but I will always love him for the way he taught me about animals throughout my life. He’s also a Tory, which is the worst thing anyone can be in my eyes! But he’s the only one I’d ever tolerate. He has loads of faults, I know, but he’d still be the main guest at my fantasy dinner party. I would only want to talk to him about animals anyway. Oh no!! My first genuinel…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/21 10:05 PM
47

Don’t wonder about it. He might have tried harder in the beginning. But if he wanted to, he would! Chances are he would have just manipulated you more successfully and you’d now be feeling worse about the whole relationship. At least that way, the red flags were easy to spot.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/21 01:53 AM
107

Well done for distancing yourself! But men are not like dogs. Dogs can and will stop when you tell them to. Dogs don’t have entitlement, men do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/21 01:39 AM
109

That’s it exactly! It’s not about sex, it’s about control. They literally get a thrill from the hurt and shock they cause you. I had an older female relative have a distressing experience recently. She just answered the phone and a man said her name and gave his and she said she didn’t know him. He told her to wait a moment, made some noises then told her he’d just cum!! She’s in her 70s! He’d never seen her. It wasn’t about sex, it was about upsetting a woman, having control over her and shocki…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/21 12:55 AM
70

This makes so much sense! My narc ex was the most aggressive driver I’ve ever known. It always used to confuse me that he’d get so worked up that other people were slowing him down on the roads. He thought his time was so important. Which is weird because he never worked a job more than a month in nearly 20 years! I never knew why he was in such a rush.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/21 12:17 AM
90

Hmmm!! I think I’d have to agree. I’m also white and I have a type that goes across all races but I’d never be interested if their only interest was the fact that I’m white! I suppose it is a conquest thing to them, in the same way particularly beautiful or rich women have to be careful they’re not being used as a trophy/sugar momma. Great post! Definitely something to be aware of!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/21 11:09 PM
29

Absolutely and I think it’s also shocking how little they know you as a person after spending so long pretending to be interested in you as an individual. They put you in a box, “woman I use to help me” and goddess help you when you try and step out of it. It also relates back to a comment I put on another post about honesty. Women are inherently honest about their personalities and in their interactions with people. Men so often are not. But they are exceptional at faking it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/21 01:13 AM
8

I’ve also watched that show a few times and it’s not the first time that same waitress has done that…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 08:55 PM
28

The bimbo guy nearly made me fall over laughing! 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 08:54 PM
18

Yup! I noticed a few said that in the comments too! 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 08:52 PM
96

This, this, this! All day and all night and the weekend too! So many women (including me) will base their own moral standards on how they treat other people and think that others (men) do the same. They don’t! They’ll pretend to, but they don’t. Then once you’ve seen them for what they are, they’ll try and peg you as being just like what THEY really are. Callous, lying, self centred, self absorbed and incapable of caring about other humans. Even their own children and family. They live in a hate…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 08:16 PM
17

I don’t know if it’s where he met his girlfriend but it’s this church
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/21 11:04 PM
29

I’m absolutely infuriated over the Penelope Jackson case. I’m convinced that so many women who are convicted in similar circumstances are punished for being honest and owning up to the responsibility of their actions which so few men do. The guy in the Moss case left her to die and sat in his car trying to think about how he could spin it to get the least amount of responsibility possible. They will lie through their teeth and fake remorse to not be held accountable. Women are more likely to res…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/21 08:38 PM
143

I’m teaching my children that the only people they should ever love unconditionally is their own children. That’s it. Not me. Not future partners. No one but children. I won’t force them to love me unconditionally because it will just set them up for future abuse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/21 08:12 PM
461

Ah! How sweet! All the reasons he “loves” her are the things she does for him and nothing individual to her. I used to really like him but then he abandoned Anna Faris and their twins because muh peenus. Then he publicly supported a homophobic church and it just got worse and worse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/21 07:36 PM
3

PSA: always have a back up vibrator girls!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/21 10:05 PM
9

Poor vibrator is probably stressed or had too much to drink 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/21 10:04 PM
28

Pahahaha!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/21 09:57 PM
20

Yeah I know a lot of women will deliberately make themselves as unappealing to men as possible after sexual trauma.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 12:39 PM
34

Oh yeah. He’s long gone now and I took his children with me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 12:37 PM
55

I know from personal experience that is completely true!!! I was the bread winner. I still had to do everything. I became disabled. He had to do things. He imploded.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 09:59 AM
5

I’m late to this but I wanted to add how well done I found this part. I’ve been in that situation but worse and the way it was depicted was spot on. I loved this show. My only criticism is that at the end, Shaun realised he’s a danger to his child and backs off. That is so rare!! For most of us the fight is lifelong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 09:50 AM
32

Very good points but I just wanted to add in this. Some LVM are clever enough to turn this around on you. They will make up things that your face is saying to go against your words. They will tell you they’ve seen micro expressions on you that prove their point and not yours. They will really try anything they can think of to mess with your mind. An extension of the “men know women more than women know themselves” fallacy. Ask me how I know. 🤦🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 09:32 AM
44

Fraud: what were you wearing when you were defrauded? How much had you had to drink? Are you sure you didn’t give them permission to defraud you? If you report this, it might ruin the life of a good fraudster! It’s probably your fault you were defrauded anyway. There’s no way a court will prosecute a fraudster. If you report it to the police, they might defraud you too! Yeah, it’s not the same!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 09:25 AM
69

They want the continuation of their genes but not to put any effort into actually raising their children. It’S A wOmAn’S jOb AnYwAy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 09:07 AM
46

I’m concerned as well. I’m sorry because you seem so happy in your relationship but you’re “building” your man to become what you want and it doesn’t work. You say that you’ve watched p*rn so you don’t feel you can ask him to cut it out completely, Did you masturbate to it? Did you get sexual pleasure from seeing a man being degraded, humiliated, beaten or forced? Did you watch teenage boys that had no choice about being filmed but not care because it was more important for you to get off? I rea…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/21 02:05 AM
40

Oh hell yeah!! A male atheist family member is always being complemented for still having morals without believing in god. I’m also atheist and moralistic but no one cares because I’m female and I’m expected to be good so it’s not a massive surprise to people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/10/21 03:58 PM
1

You gotta love him! And you gotta love pickle breath!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/10/21 03:27 PM
28

Yeah, got that T-shirt
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/21 06:48 PM
126

There’s a court case in the UK at the moment of a woman in her 60s accused of murder after she stabbed and killed her abusive, controlling husband. She called the police herself and admitted it and said it was because she’s had enough of his control. But yeah, single people are the broken ones… Better single than prison.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/21 06:09 PM
35

Probably both and more. As you find your strength you will find more things that will help you. Exercising definitely helped me a lot. Research reading is great, as is filling your time so you’re not able to just sit and fester over it all. Your time is precious, spend it with people who deserve it if you can. Just one step at a time until one day you’ll just realise you don’t care anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 10:58 PM
124

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. You’re doing brilliantly!! If that helps. You’re doing everything right. It seems like he has some idea that it’s coming? Even if he thinks he’s talked you round again? Be very careful if he does. Protect yourself above all else. As for the feelings, I’ve been through a situation where I had to disassociate from my feelings while still living with my partner. It’s hard but doable. If you absolutely can’t get out before you can break the lease, you need to …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 10:01 PM
26

I love, love, LOVE your energy!! “I don’t think we should see each other anymore” 👍🏽!!! Dying!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 07:47 PM
4

That’s awful!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 07:40 PM
8

I’m late to this but I had a husband who would actually do housework but that was because he was terminally unemployed. But while I was working/raising the kids he became abusive - not enough attention on him! Then I got sick and he became more abusive because I was at home but physically unable to help with the cleaning. My point? Even when they do clean or care about cleanliness, they will still abuse you for it because it’s “women’s work”. Scrotes gonna scrote!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 12:43 PM
5

I’d be well up for that. I’m so grateful to FDS because it’s opened my eyes to how my daughter gets treated, even by myself and I considered myself a feminist. I wasn’t!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 07:11 PM
3

Sorry, bad wording. I meant I’ve just moved away from being in the situation you’re in now, so I’m a bit ahead of you. I had to do it for 18 months and it was really hard so I’ve an idea how you’re feeling right now. All I can say is you’ll be so much happier once you’re out of there - the constant reminders don’t help either. You’ll also be able to look back at all you’ve achieved and be proud of how far you’ve come.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 07:07 PM
7

Then I’m at the point that you’ll be in the spring. It is hard but every day the narcissist isn’t sucking the life out of you is a better day than the one before. Be as kind to yourself as you can. It’s all part of learning that you deserve better. Because you do. x
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 05:12 PM
5

I’ve had some paramedics tell her she should be a nurse. Not a doctor. A nurse of course, because she’s female. Never mind the fact that she’s got the intelligence to be a brain surgeon! A nurse is the best she can hope for apparently. Her brother is also expected to be the “naughty” one while she’s expected to be pleasant and submissive, particularly with her father and his side of the family. They treat her like a pretty doll and dismiss her feelings but her brother gets treated like he’s allo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 04:02 PM
6

Absolutely!! It’s totally different. He’s allowed to be who he is and she is forced to conform. It’s one of the reasons I left my abusive ex. He was grooming her to be his future abuse victim.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 03:46 PM
46

I tell my children that the only people they should love unconditionally is their own children. Everyone else should have conditions, even me. Not all mothers are automatically good and neither are partners so I’m not going to teach them to love me unconditionally because it sets them up for abuse in the future. I’m not that selfish.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 09:08 AM
20

I have boy/girl twins in school and I’ve had to tell the teacher to stop giving my daughter responsibility for teaching my son because she’s more focused and better at listening. Even when I’m the one benefitting by my son being given help, I’m not prepared to sacrifice my daughter like that. Especially when the other children realised and would go to her for help too. She ended up not being able to do her own work because she was so busy with everyone else’s. Hell no!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 08:57 AM
31

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I totally get it. I’ve just moved away from where my abuser isolated me. Would moving to a new area be a possibility for you? Having a fresh start is great for your mental health, especially after abuse. If it’s not an option, what can you do to change your situation? It sounds like you’re just existing, which is necessary sometimes but it will leave you mentally worn down and more susceptible to being abused again. Where is your strength coming from? Woul…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 08:39 AM
39

I noticed how it was just a joke when she did it in the past but when it was done to her the woman became the devil! Apparently to understand men you have to completely give up your ability to empathise with women. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 01:02 AM
43

Learn how to magnetise men = learn how to be a magnet for abusive men. To be fair, if you just want any man, it would work… but so would going outside naked.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 12:55 AM
258

I’m noticing that women are very often “othered” even by women. She describes us as some sort of generic non-human entity as if she’s not a woman herself! I can’t see what it gains her either because the comments are just men being vile to her and women in general. Complete fail at being the “cool, not like other girls”. It’s really sad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 12:39 AM
58

It’s all about control. They’re not looking for a partner, they’re looking for a bangmaid to control and abuse. Younger women are easier to control just because they have less life experience. All you can do is stay safe and avoid them as much as possible. Depending on your culture, some things work better than others. Have you thought about getting a pretend boyfriend? He could be in the army and a very jealous man. If it keeps you safe, do it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 01:53 PM
3

Ha ha ha! Very true!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 08:05 AM
23

Same here. I got out of an awful relationship and I have been able to heal faster because of FDS. This week I’ve started my new life. It’s been a huge change with a lot of stress but I’ve got through it because of what I’ve learned here and the power it has given me. I’m staying calm and happy because I know I’ve got my sisters.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/21 09:56 PM
12

Social media self flagellation. I must be good because I spend so much time worrying about being good. I’m not mocking, I used to be like that myself but with a lot less crying over being a bad wife and a lot more crying over having a shit husband! I was showing how good I was by putting up with him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 03:20 PM
26

“Hello! I get all my validation from my husband’s and other’s perceived evaluation of my wifing skills!” That’s a very happy husband right there!! But probably not. Because men who are controlling or abusive or in dysfunctional relationships aren’t happy. They are happiest when they have a genuine emotional connection with someone who they consider their equal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 03:04 PM
5

Me too! I’m ok. I’ve got my kids in there but they’re very far down the list.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 10:10 AM
45

What? Like “❤️Jared’s girl 😍❤️❤️❤️👰‍♀️”? OMFG!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 10:07 AM
113

Snort! 🐷 These days it’s the onlyfans too. Check out my t*ts here: ☠️☠️☠️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 10:03 AM
111

I think it’s a cultural thing and part of patriarchal control. Many men know that women get power from other women and they deliberately take up all of their partner’s time and look down on them spending time with friends. They literally keep us too busy to have empowering relationships so they can abuse us and control us more easily. We definitely need friends who are aware of this and put effort into the friendship. Edit: for the scrotes downvoting because they’re mad we’ve found out… 👋Have a …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 10:01 AM
26

Snort!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 04:44 PM
3

He sounds like a psychopath and he’s already training you to settle for less after just 4 dates. Please block and delete this guy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 06:00 PM
2

Hmmm. This is indeed a tough one. Given that we only have what is written here to go on, it's very easy to see why he feels betrayed and the mistakes that she made. However, there is just one line that stuck out to me: "I know it's f*cked up, but the thought of having to both relive my trauma and risk John leaving me were realities I didn't want to confront" She was thinking of telling him at a more appropriate time and obviously knew enough to decide that the risk of him leaving over it was too…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 11:31 AM
90

Since when did ‘healthy sexual appetite” mean being depraved and willing to stick your dick in anything that moves? There’s absolutely nothing healthy about that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 09:10 AM
28

Love this!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 09:02 AM
169

Why do I get the feeling that if she’d needed him to care for her when he was younger he would have divorced her by now?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 09:01 AM
34

As someone who grew up around musicians, this made me snort!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 03:34 PM
19

Love this! Maybe it should be it’s own post. If we don’t like our men as much as our best friends why are we bothering with them? The beginning of the end for my abusive marriage was me finding a new best friend that I could talk to so much more than my own husband. Now he’s gone and she’s in my life for good. We lift each other up. We laugh. We can talk for hours about any subject on Earth. She’s beautiful and funny and talented and has a kindness that is unique to her. She’s fierce and strong …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 04:08 AM
11

Spot on!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 03:34 AM
11

That’s what I got immediately. Total love bomb behaviour. When you have experience it’s like you get a narc alarm installed and mine is going off over this guy! 🚨🚨🚨
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 02:21 AM
23

Oh hell yeah! I’d say it’s excessive hate in general. They hate themselves and they hate their parents for creating them and they hate you for loving them and hate you even more for leaving them. They hate anyone they can’t control for not being controllable and hate anyone they can control for being stupid enough to fall for it. They really are hateful people. Every one of them could choose to get help and change at any point so if they don’t, they have no one to blame but themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 02:12 AM
379

I don’t think there’s any mania or even desperation here. Somehow it’s even worse than that. If it was mania he’s trying to get a high from a connection with or control over someone. If it’s desperation there’s probably also depression involved and in his head it’s just “sex, sex, sex”. Unfortunately I think it’s just efficiency. It’s like a job to him. He’s not looking at any of them. There are no emotions involved. At least, not until he seems to accidentally hit the wrong button and angrily g…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 02:01 AM
2

Same! And I somehow manage to do this stuff now without screaming at everyone around me. Weird!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 01:39 AM
7

Or even having someone much better in the bed with you. Like your kid or the dog…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 01:37 AM
5

Omgodess you’ve cracked it!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 01:35 AM
1

Anyone up for making a completely fake troll sub? Where we constantly bash men using fake accounts, or we could even set up bots to do it for us because who has the time and it could just be the scrote distraction sub so we can get some much needed peace.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 01:33 AM
17

Probably very similar. If you know the Ali G character it’s very like the actual people he based that on. They’re essentially white British men who dress and act like Black Americans to be “gangsta”! It’s incredibly cringe!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 01:22 AM
7

I understood that reference…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 01:20 AM
55

Ah! Does Schrödinger’s woman also have Schrödinger’s vagina? Simultaneously having had no penises and ALL the penises…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 01:15 AM
18

I’ve tasted my own breast milk and I’ve tasted formula just to see what it tastes like. It’s absolutely vile!! Breast milk is so much nicer and I can at least understand it appealing to men from a sexual point of view but formula? It has to just be jealousy. He’s drinking it so his baby can’t. She’s asked him to stop and he’s refusing. She needs to get the kid away from him before he does something else to punish a baby for getting the attention he feels he is entitled to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 08:53 AM
3

Check this out!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 01:45 PM
11

Sometimes it can just be simple but hard to recognise like societal conditioning. Sometimes it’s family pressure/expectations or internalised expectations based on what you’ve observed in your parents. It might take therapy to work it out. Being single is just seen as being a failure in our society though. All I can say is that there is a way to break free of that and to feel content and happy in yourself. The journey is different for all of us but you’re going the right way just by being here. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 01:43 PM
6

I'm disabled and have very limited energy so I've found a few things that help. Gadgets!! Look for things that will make cleaning and your life easier in general. You don't have to spend a fortune, many things would only be a few dollars/pounds. I have a small bin that hangs off my kitchen cupboard next to my chopping board - helps stop me from not clearing up as I go. Having a really good, easy to use mop and cleaning supplies. My mop has a wet bucket and a dry bucket. So much easier to just gr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 01:17 PM
15

Well done you!! Just be careful because there's a couple of narc red flags in his behaviour. Giving a fake apology and he used DARVO. Defend, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender. He might lash out again in some way but as long as you block and delete and do the same to anyone who listens to him, you'll be fine.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 12:43 PM
35

Well done! That's a great thing to do. Just a couple of tips, if you feel you want them: It doesn't matter how compatible someone is with you if they're not interested (and not interested enough is not interested). There's nothing wrong with being lonely and sad. You just need to understand why so you can deal with it. Are you used to getting validation from these men? Are you sad because you don't know where that validation is going to come from now? Do you know what you'll do with the time the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 12:35 PM
17

Omg! What a rollercoaster ride! She sounds very much like the old me. She absolutely is being abused. She just doesn’t know it yet. Writing hateful messages to her friends pretending to be from her is abusive and isolating. I can almost hear him poisoning her mind over you. I’d bet my life savings that he’s convinced her that you’re lying about the abortion too. Yeah here’s not much you can do anyway. She’s too far gone. You could be available for her in the future if she gets free and there mig…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 04:51 PM
303

That’s a “slept with someone else” sized fuck up at least! Maybe even on a “asked you to abort our baby”/“got the mistress pregnant” level.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 10:47 AM
266

Agreed. I’d also like to add (from my own unfortunate experience) that they don’t always leave, many will use your/your child’s illness as an excuse to become (or finally show they are) abusive too. I’m not saying it’s easy. It’s not because so many men have learnt to keep their abusive behaviour under wraps until marriage and/or children come along. Maybe you just always have to be ready to leave. Even if you’ve got the marriage and kids, even if they’ve been HV up to that point. Always have a …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 10:44 AM
15

This energy right here! I love it! That’s pretty much what I’m going with too. Children will always come first. It’s very possible to create a full life without needing a man in it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/21 04:13 PM
120

It’s also funny how she’s apparently responsible for him not going to his dream school but she’s also responsible for her not being able to do her dream of a phd.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 04:26 PM
45

It does happen! Sometimes women are isolated like I was and they just need some validation from somewhere and that’s enough to pull the trigger. I posted in relationship advice and got 80/20 he was abusive in the comments and got free. I think it can be worth throwing in the occasional bit of advice because you never know when it might be what saves someone. It’s a personal risk to all of us too though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 04:23 PM
121

You’re absolutely right. And I think male heterosexual prostitutes are so rare because the demand just doesn’t exist and that says so much about women and men. Women could get sex with someone who wants to have sex with them far more easily than a man but it’s not necessarily going to be any good. So why not hire a man who actually knows what to do? Because we care!! Because we have empathy and forcing someone to have sex with us when they don’t want to is repulsive to the majority of us. Yet so…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 09:35 AM
41

Dying!!! ☠️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 09:18 AM
85

No, she was a school teacher. She apparently lived for her students. Just walking through a park on her way home. Edit: I’m apparently getting downvotes on this comment, which means the scrotes are mad that I said a teacher shouldn’t be killed for walking through a park!! Really scrotes? You think she should have been killed just for existing as a woman and a woman of colour at that! And you wonder why no one wants to sleep with you willingly? Every time you press that downvote button you’re red…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 05:54 PM
8

This was a MAN as well. They are capable! Especially when they’re high value. And single! They do exist! Except he’s not dating atm because he’s working on levelling up after a break up!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 03:14 PM
20

Ok so I was isolated terribly and I owe a lot to Reddit for giving me a place to talk about what I was going through and the advice and validation I received started me on my journey to becoming free from abuse. A year later and I’m talking to a family member I’d reconnected with and I found out the previous year they’d heard I was using Reddit. They created an account and trawled it to find my anonymous post and commented anonymously on it. They were able to tell me exactly what I needed to hea…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 11:37 AM
196

I just really wanted something here for Sabina. I’m not a woc but I’m so aware of how different the media attention is when the dead woman is white compared to any other ethnicity. Sabina was killed in a public park in daylight, possibly by a stranger. A 40 year old man has been arrested and released. Sabina is yet another wonderful, kind, beautiful woman who has had her life snatched away just by being in a park at the same time as a depraved man. Forgotten and ignored because of the colour of …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 10:41 AM
31

This!!! All day this! It makes me want to weep that this isn’t the norm for us. I’m not the kind of person to give in to despair though and I actually have some ideas how we could get there. Of course it’s going to have to be women doing all the work to achieve it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 10:30 AM
26

There are women who save up more than that for boob jobs. Probably a worthy investment in the father of your child!! Ffs! Edit: I’m not trying to shame anyone who’s had a boob job. Just saying if your boobs are worth that investment, your future children are too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 04:38 PM
66

Was it just me that read that like it was being said by the guy in From Dusk Til Dawn? 😆🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 04:32 PM
53

Me too!! Maybe that’s what the red pill is? They took it from The Matrix, maybe the red pill puts you into a matrix where you’re incredibly entitled and deluded, idk
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 04:30 PM
41

Snort!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 04:27 PM
6

I’ve stopped at 3. I think I picked good potential Queens or at least women who will benefit from realising the full extent of the abuse they are going through. It is difficult because it’s hard to tell who’s too committed to gaslighting themselves. I got some replies so hopefully it will help and if just one of those 3 women manages to escape a lifetime of abuse then it’s worth trying occasionally.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 04:22 PM
7

I had to go look!! It’s… astonishing. But also a good place to find potential Queens. I’ve already messaged someone. 🤞🏼
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 03:10 PM
18

Well done!! You’re probably right, always trust your intuition. Maybe just tell people that it just turned out to not be a good fit for you? You don’t have to frame it as a negative thing, it’s a positive and don’t let anyone tell you any different. You’re doing your research. That’s the absolute right thing to do. You want to work for the ideal company doing the ideal job for you, not the ideal company doing any job. Especially if it’s going to be glorified tea girl. Take advantage of the oppor…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 02:51 PM
22

Imagine this one if you can… grandfather in his 70s, housing and paying expenses for a 40 year old adult man so that said man-child can be deadbeat and not support his own actual children. You can’t make this shit up!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 01:47 PM
29

Try covering the mouths on the second photo, it’s terrifying!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 10:11 PM
169

“Yes. I’m not your mother!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 03:35 PM
8

This ⬆️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 01:43 PM
17

I’m late to this party but the realisations hitting me are insane. That’s why my ex broke the bathroom lock. That’s why I still have panic attacks in my bathroom. That’s why I had to beg him to let me bath or shower in peace and not be sexually assaulted because I was forced to be naked while I cleaned myself. That’s why. FFS!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 01:06 PM
67

Seriously, I will grow out all my body hair, perm it and dye it pink if it keeps scrotes like this away from me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 11:29 AM
33

WTAF? Do you need toilet paper? Never cleaned the bedroom? My preteen sons are more independent than this man-baby. Why is it so funny to them? Why do they both find it so funny that he’s useless and she has to mother him? I don’t get it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 01:57 PM
23

It’s very easy to feel like that because society is designed to make you think you should accept it. Your body was telling you it was wrong at the time but societal pressure to conform and lack of accurate information overruled it. You’re punishing yourself now for your younger self not being able to figure something out when the whole world tells you you’re wrong. Guilt can be beneficial to a point, it helps us learn. But then you need to start having gratitude and appreciation for the fact tha…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/21 10:26 AM
64

I don’t think we need to say anything. Maybe just “yeah, you’re probably right, why don’t you go off and watch some porn” and then while he’s distracted get far away from him and block and delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/21 10:09 AM
56

Very well said! You’re absolutely right and I’m sorry you got shouted down for saying it before. I’m not a woc or in the states but I know the stats here are pretty damn similar.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 09:01 PM
11

That’s gross! I’m so sorry you have to put up with that
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 06:55 PM
30

I think I agree. It’s definitely made me more likely to think any man would be low value, but, let’s face it, I’m probably going to be right 99.9% of the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 05:30 PM
20

Oooh!!! Very true!! Maybe we should start a flair for the other type, BMM. Bare Minimum Man!!!! Reflect the other types to avoid too!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 05:27 PM
59

I agree to a point. Many seem to be posted as warnings of red flag behaviour but you’re right that a lot are just “look how insane this man is”. However, there may be some benefit to these types of post too. There are flairs for them. Also the fact that they are posted often means that this is probably the only safe space a lot of women have to post/discuss that sort of stuff. I get that. Maybe we need to expand our space to include that kind of post on another/a new sub that’s also women only a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 05:15 PM
8

Keep your name!! I didn’t like my original name and changed it when I married. Now I hate my new name even more. I can’t wait to go back. If your family name has bad connotations, pick your own new one. No need to have his because it can always fall apart. You don’t want to be stuck with him because you need to keep his name for your business or something.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 10:43 AM
7

I'm so happy for you! I found FDS just after I got free and it has given me so much strength! I wasn't allowed women or anyone who empowered me around either. Look forward to your life now. It's just going to keep getting better and better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 05:39 PM
201

Agreed! Most women make exceptional partners. I know I did/do. I'm not accepting anything but at least exceptional in return. Choosing a man shouldn't be like choosing which political party to vote for. If you're picking the lesser of two evils because there are no other options then it's time for a revolution my friend!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 05:27 PM
20

I’m still going. I’m freaking out that someone with a PHD seems to have written a blog about my WHOLE DAMN LIFE!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/21 11:41 AM
42

I’m still going. I’m freaking out that someone with a PHD seems to have written a blog about my WHOLE DAMN LIFE!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/21 11:40 AM
109

I’m tired today. Not feeling great and I didn’t want to get into anything too heavy but I thought I’d check in on my FDS ladies to cheer myself up and posts like this are why I love this sub!! I’ve saved the whole blog to read through. Learning helps me feel better and I was married to this man described everywhere on this blog!! Thank you so much! Love you ladies!! 😍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/21 10:15 AM
17

I noticed that but the article is more concerned with any perceived faults the victim had! It’s a shame because if he’s have killed her by hitting her with his car while drunk, he’d probably have been given a longer sentence
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/21 03:56 PM
32

Very true!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/21 01:54 PM
156

Yeah, p*rnography would never be eradicated to protect the women and children who are by far the most mentally and physically damaged by it. But I suppose there is a chance it could happen because men finally realise it’s damaging their peepees.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/21 01:06 PM
173

Eugh!! What kind of adult human needs a baby to save them? Why? Because it forces you to be a grown up? Get a dog and therapy for Christ’s sake!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/21 08:58 AM
148

Think of it this way. The only reason you’re hurting now is because you’re grieving for the future you thought you were going to have with him. But it’s a trick our minds play on us. That future never existed because he just would have gotten worse the more you put up with. You’re not hurting because of love for him, you’re hurting because he’s not the one and your brain and your body know that you deserve better. We’ve been taught that our hurt from broken relationships is our fault for not bei…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 09:37 AM
1

You’re probably right, I always get it confused
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 09:02 PM
89

I prefer taller men but I’m tall. I wouldn’t turn down a short guy if he was high value just for being short either. I actually quite fancy an actor who is very short but very yummy. But men get away with having breast size preferences so why get so butthurt over height? It’s not like we’re comparing penis sizes here! Come on!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 06:30 PM
21

So many of these terrible systems we have in place operate as if we live in a perfect world but they know full well we don’t.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 11:58 AM
5

I’m a bit late to this but I thought I’d add my perspective. I have kids, I’m not currently dating and I don’t plan to. I also don’t plan not to. I’m just going to live my life putting myself and my kids first. If I did happen to meet a man I would vet for a few months before letting him have very short meetings with my kids and they already know that if I did meet someone and they didn’t like them, their opinion would be enough for me to end it. I won’t settle for anything but the best HVM beca…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 11:56 AM
32

It’s just passing on trauma. It was done to them so they do it to others. It’s no excuse. Nothing will get better until people stop passing on their trauma to others but I don’t see men being the ones to do anything about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 11:23 AM
79

I’m confused as to how they think that an abortion is punishing a baby for a woman’s “immoral” actions. In so many cases it is more of a punishment on the baby to be forced to live in a world where its parents don’t want it. They act like they’re is automatically a constant amount of love, time and money for all these “saved” babies and there isn’t. Even more so when the mothers are being forced into it. It’s actually punishing both the mother and the baby through forced birth but once again the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 09:17 AM
27

🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 09:02 AM
10

You have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. You will get there. Much love. xxx
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 12:16 PM
20

I’ve found this link that has a list of organisations fighting the law in Texas. I’m UK and we have a similar problem in NI where many women have to come to the mainland for abortions, because Catholicism. There are similar organisations that help these women who are unable to fly or get the ferry needed like this one here. I’m so glad I live in a country that provides safe free abortions. For now…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 09:09 AM
10

I’ve heard there are places you can donate to that will post out abortion pills to women who need them. It’s not ideal because the women need support and it’s taking all that away too. It’s really a perfect way to word it for anti abortionists. I’ll see if I can find a link.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 09:04 AM
31

Why did you stay? Because he designed it that way. Because society designs it that way. He is a rapist. You asked him to stop and he didn’t. You can still call the police about that if or when you choose. I’ve been in a very similar place and I just want to tell you it’s not your fault. You didn’t deserve it and you will get better. Especially if you stick with FDS and therapy, therapy and more therapy. Then, when you think you’re done, get more therapy. If it’s available to you, please use it a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 09:00 AM
13

😝
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 08:46 AM
22

This is true!!! The second they got attention they would drop their objections like a hot potato covered in 💩
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 08:46 AM
35

The theory is supposed to be that our surge in oestrogen once a month sends us insane. But I think that testosterone is constantly surging in men, making them less able to remain logical than women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 08:41 AM
24

Sometimes I think it’s from watching movies and putting themselves as the main character. They think they’re John Wick, Captain Kirk, Jason Bourne and Hans Solo rolled into one. They think that someone is writing a script to their lives where they win every time and get every woman they want then get angry when it doesn’t happen. Just a theory but it’s definitely true of some men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 08:37 AM
87

The problem is the way the law is worded is so insidious it’s insane. Because anyone can sue anyone who has had or provided an abortion and if they win they get all fees paid but if the doctor or patient win they don’t get any costs back. It is designed in such a way to make abortion providers too scared to provide abortions at all because it would just result in their clinics losing everything. The clinics will just close because even providing abortions before 6 weeks will be risky because the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 07:52 AM
12

Not in the music so much, it all has to be put through a patriarchal music industry but I think she tries to get messages through. More in her personal life. I saw a documentary posted on here that had a bit about how she’s portrayed in the media and she seems to have a fairly FDS approach to dating. Just on the bit I saw anyway. I don’t actually follow any music artist’s personal life usually.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 07:50 PM
5

True story. Ask me how I know!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 04:31 PM
60

I’ve found FDS is changing my music tastes. I’m enjoying more female singers these days and I’m pretty sure Taylor Swift has FDS tendencies. One of my current favourites is Drops of Jupiter by Train. I found out it was written about his mother who died of cancer and it shows how much he worshipped this amazing HVW in his life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 04:11 PM
32

It’s truly awful!! I feel so worried for the women this affects. The good part is that if you follow the link to Twitter in the article it shows you how women are flooding the whistleblower website with nonsense. That’s such a great idea! I’m not in the states so it won’t let me but if anyone who is wants to try, here’s the link Edit: if anyone knows how you can use a VPN to get around. I’m going to learn…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 04:02 PM
25

I really hate that idea! I’m a single mother because I wouldn’t put up with myself and my children being abused. How does that bring the downfall of society? I’m improving society if anything because I have 2 boys that are now going to grow up to be HVM instead of yet more scrotes like their father. I think the “downfall of society” comes far more from when mothers stay with abusive men and raise sons who will be abusive and daughters who will accept abuse. They only get mad about it because the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 11:53 AM
35

Oh that guy saw that you were being abused and set himself up as the anti-ex just so he could use it to lure you in and abuse you himself. What a prick!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/21 10:27 AM
5

Ah, hello the old me!! You were so goddess damn miserable being loyal to a fictional character! Meet new me. I’m loyal to myself and happier than I’ve been in years. 🥰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 11:29 PM
32

I agree. I heard that news and just thought it means nothing coming from the Chinese government. They are all about control. I learned about the ongoing fate of Uighers a couple of years ago and I’ve been following what’s happening since. It’s very hard since they don’t like the negative press do they?!?!? It’s almost equivalent to praising the Taliban for banning porn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 05:28 PM
9

You’re still sticking to your rule because you’re just not wishing anything bad on a potential women these scrotes might comes across.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 03:15 PM
166

He looks like he was woken in the middle of the night by an emergency phone call while he was staying at a YMCA, then just stumbled around in the dark picking up an item of clothing from about 12 different men. Then stayed awake for 3 days straight then went on the red carpet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 03:02 PM
119

Why can’t he deliver food? Or at least look after the kids while she does it? He’s probably tired after working hard on his commission only job 🙄. PSA: if you have a lot of bad months on a commission only job, you’re crap at it. Get something that pays actual money.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 11:45 AM
83

It looks to me like he’s trying to say that a man arguing with a man is at risk of being punched but a woman arguing with a man is only at risk of being offended. Yeah, I’d like to know where he lives. This magical place where men never hit women. We could all move there!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 11:41 AM
19

Please be students! 🙏 Seriously though, this could be anywhere. I’ve seen plenty of “homes” like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 11:37 AM
104

I’m really beginning to think that if anything is going to change it will be through an organisation of women helping women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 11:33 AM
30

I bet you are delightful and I hope you find yourself a man who deserves you!! But I’m sure someone so delightful will have a life filled with friends and laughter so you won’t notice if you stay single anyway. Well done!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 10:46 AM
62

I have some experience with dementia/Alzheimer’s through my work and family. It is one of the most horrible experiences and for the family as much or even more than the patient. Because the patient doesn’t always know what’s happening to them but the family do and they can actually be abused by the person that they are trying to care for. There’s so many different ways it can go too. They can forget who you are or they can fixate on you and only be calm in the presence of one person which become…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 10:40 AM
30

A lot of it is because in medical research they use men as much as possible, even when researching issues directly affecting women, like breast cancer. They think we’re just men with pesky hormones.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 12:39 AM
13

I’d probably always recommend contacting a “crazy” ex. I know I’m being called that but I’m not going anywhere near my ex and I’m very happy to stay away for life!! But if any of his new gfs want to message me I would tell them the truth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 01:22 PM
9

As someone who has been through a similar experience I just want to tell you, it’s AMAZING on this side!! Now you’ve realised you’ll find it gets easier and easier to get over them. Once you’re fully away you’ll feel a freedom you’ve never felt before. You’ll find energy for a new life that will become possible without all that dead weight. Enjoy it!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 09:56 AM
156

I know! How dare women have self respect, standards and the ability to turn down sex!! We don’t want them and it hurts their fee fees.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 09:19 AM
3

This right here ⬆️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 06:47 PM
213

It’s like in the UK soaps when an actor leaves to try their luck in Hollywood then a couple of years later they’re back on the soap saying they missed playing that character. My arse!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 06:42 PM
59

I had that as a kid too, having a brother who weaponised incompetence and I hated it. I also hated Christmas and special events with my extended family because the women would do all the work for days and weeks, prepare all the food and afterwards the men would go and relax while the women cleaned up and I just refused.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 01:11 PM
18

I’ll try and give my perspective to give some understanding but feel free to spot all the red flags I ignored on my journey. Got with my ex young. I was clear about wanting marriage and children in that order. He future faked me. We got engaged quickly. I had a career that was never going to pay much. He had loads of plans about how he was going to support me. After years of engagement none of his plans had worked but all mine had except the marriage and kids part. I loved him and I thought he l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 01:07 PM
2

I’ve been watching the SWAT remake and I find that very good in the way it deals with many issues like racism and it focuses a lot on misogyny in an elite part of the police. They have 3 great female badass characters, all badass in different ways. A young bisexual SWAT officer working in a male environment. A beautiful captain taking on the politics of being in charge of men. An older battle ready woman who initially is received as hostile and a bad cop but develops into actually being someone …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 12:44 PM
3

Ha ha ha! Bullet dodged there then. This is why men are their own worst enemies. You liked him, he liked you. He just let his entitlement and scrotacity cockblock himself. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 12:30 PM
10

Is it just me that thought maybe it isn’t his kid, it’s a kid he’s kidnapped and the locks are to keep them in the basement? That’s why he’s a different pedigree!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 12:02 PM
43

It’s actually quite easy to change a 50/50 husband. You just divorce him and get a better one that actually loves you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 11:40 AM
203

I have young boys and I recently discovered that they will do everything necessary to get what they want. They have to earn computer privileges and after a deliberately rubbish attempt to cleaning their room I told them it wasn’t enough to get anything and it would have to be as spotless as if I’d done it. Well they got clothes and hoovers and I honestly couldn’t have done better myself. Even when they’re children, if they want to, they will!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 11:16 AM
174

So instead of looking at her as an amazing human who put her body through hell just to bring his child into the world, he’s just concerned about his porn sick peepee that’s gotten to used to Instagram models and OnlyFans that he’s probably been overdosing on since he couldn’t get anything from his wife after she gave birth. Men are vile! I really don’t know why so many women want one. Forget the red and blue pill, I want to take a pink pill that turns me into a lesbian. Edit: Thanks for the mess…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 11:08 AM
52

I was thinking about how our FDS principles relate to the animal world so I did a bit of Googling. It’s only a Wikipedia link but it’s an eye opening view of how males in different species sexually coerce females. Interestingly, in most species the females also have a counter strategy to sexual coercion. While in some species the males will separate the females from family and other females, in others, mainly primates and dolphin species, the females will join together to protect each other from…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 06:19 PM
74

But … but… men are so bRaVe!!! If a fit and healthy man can’t drive to a shop and look a cashier in the eye while he buys sanitary pads but a woman can be brave enough to get on a bus 3 weeks after major surgery, with a new born she’s been looking after alone, in a pandemic. Don’t tell me men are the braver sex ever again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:47 PM
39

That’s where I am. I’ve had a c section too and I’m dying inside for this poor kid.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:43 PM
123

Also he says no is allowed to call him out. This is blatantly a point about misogyny and patriarchy but he says feminists aren’t allowed to have an opinion. Yet women are the ones oppressing men according to this tool.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:35 PM
69

Brilliant advice! “Too many good people are minced under the wheel of cruelty because the rest of us thought it would be rude to call the wheel cruel.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:33 PM
126

It’s Schrödinger’s vagina again!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:26 PM
315

Men when they almost realise the problem then flip back to it all being women’s fault 🤦🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:25 PM
23

Caroline Flack is another great example. Not necessarily of over sexualisation in the media, although she was too, but of a woman being vilified in the press for something simply because she was a woman. I’m not saying that she didn’t do anything wrong, but the punishment far outweighed the crime and the media seized on it because it fit their misogynistic narrative. They were like sharks in a feeding frenzy then had the cheek to drone on about kindness after she died.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:09 PM
2

Definitely but I think specifically a rapist who is found guilty but doesn’t get punished
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:03 PM
3

I'm not sure if Dave would work. At least not in the UK because it's a popular name and every man I've ever met has been obsessed with "Pegs Dave" so I don't think they'd be bothered. Dale is good though, or maybe Kyle
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 01:48 PM
7

I'm sure we can do this! A man who likes a submissive Asian wife (there's actually loads to choose from!) could be a Nic (Cage), a Woody (Allen), a John (Lennon) or a Mark (Zuckerberg). ​ A man who likes a "wild" stereotyped black woman... well, there's even more to choose from here. It is however, a lot harder to see a clear reason for these relationships and if it's that type of misogyny that's behind it. But if we assume that at least some of them are due to this we could have a Robert (De Ni…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 01:44 PM
23

We actually would need a range of names for men to be equivalent to Karen because there are so many ways that men benefit from the patriarchy. It would be quite easy to pick famous examples too. A man who is in a position of high power and uses it to sexually abuse young women and girls without consequences could be a Bill or a Harvey. A man who benefits from the patriarchy attacking women and ignoring men’s faults could be a Justin. I probably don’t need to explain a Leo. The possibilities are …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 11:33 AM
49

Just watched it all and it’s amazing! I seriously recommend to all Queens. It’s something I’ve been realising on my own recently anyway but to have it all described like that is mind blowing. These girls are so young when they start getting sexualised and abused and that it’s perfectly acceptable by society is shocking.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 11:13 AM
45

And why in these countries (and all in some way) many women are pressured or forced into marriage because there’s no actual benefit for so many women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 10:23 AM
14

Whenever I have been in a situation where someone else is being attacked it is always me who has intervened and not the men who were with me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 06:11 PM
24

Don’t forget to include the pedos. Inclusivity means anyone now apparently.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 05:49 PM
27

Yeah like there’s so many animals that give birth to completely different species
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 05:47 PM
29

Ooh! Fascinating topic. I’m busy today but I’m saving this post so I can read through some gems later. An initial search found this good article about how liberal feminism has failed women
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 01:35 PM
13

It’s a total double standard. I saw a meme the other day congratulating a thief for calling the police on his victim after finding CP on the computer he was stealing. That was fine apparently but a woman checking if her own partner is doing that is “snooping”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 05:41 PM
202

Let him go. You need to work on yourself now. You’re only around 24 from your post info, and you have plenty of time to fix your issues and find another HVM. You could even run into the same one again but don’t rely on that. We can’t control anyone else, only ourselves and trying to makes you LV. You didn’t destroy your relationship, it’s not you being a fundamentally flawed person. It’s the fact that you went through trauma and you weren’t equipped to deal with it at the time. It’s only by work…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 04:42 PM
70

Maybe it’s the fact that he’s a total piece of shit? No matter how much he wipes, he just keeps getting his shitty personality on the paper too!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 04:21 PM
56

I understood that reference
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 04:19 PM
39

We literally tell children that stealing is wrong then tell boys that they’ll be boys and tell girls that boys hurting them means they like them. Who TF came up with this crap? I’m almost finished with my time machine and I could do with a first time destination.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 04:17 PM
32

I need to untie my brain knot after reading that
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 04:14 PM
6

😦
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 01:49 PM
47

I think it also depends on the reasons why you’re looking. Searching for evidence of lies that directly impact your willingness to be in that relationship is fine. But my abusive ex did it to find out who I was getting support from so he could cut me off from it. But with a lot of things, because the bad reasons exist it makes society judge anyone doing it as bad, even when it is done for perfectly legitimate reasons and even for personal safety.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 01:40 PM
57

Trevor, Keith and Susan
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/21 01:36 PM
31

I won’t watch Love Island. Everyone seems to be obsessed with it but I’ve never watched so much as a minute of it and I never will. Even pre-FDS I knew those people were all as far from me as anyone could possibly get.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/21 01:33 PM
37

More like she was made in a lab for him!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 10:04 PM
47

That’s what gets me because they’re all screeching about OnlyFans and making jokes about their own mothers losing income in October and they only think it’s funny because they KNOW it’s degrading.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 10:03 PM
62

Woah! You’re so right! I can orgasm very easily and frequently and the jealousy of that during past relationships is now flashing before my eyes!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 09:59 PM
23

Maybe we’ve got this guy all wrong and he does actually want to support sex workers? Sometimes we need to give people the benefit of the doubt. I’m passionate about supporting my own imagination. I’ll spend time going through imagination exercises in order to show my support. Usually in bed at night. The orgasms I have are just a bonus! There are no selfless good deeds after all. 😛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 09:50 PM
29

chortle
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 12:16 PM
19

😬🤢🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 12:15 PM
12

Luckily the ex girlfriend and kid were ok. But imagine the damage to his rEpUtAtIoN if they had both been shot and killed? I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t come back from that and he definitely shouldn’t. Maybe it needs to be part of the strategy that we ask potential HVM if they have ever abandoned a previous partner and/or young children in dangerous situations. Smdh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 12:11 PM
22

I’ve seen all of these in just the past week! The Taliban, the incel shooting in Britain, the OnlyFans ban and the online response to all of these things is propaganda against women carried out by men (and women!) in their droves. Even when they’re pretending to be supportive of women they still seem to think making memes about this stuff is appropriate and not terrifying to women everywhere that they’ll happily normalise and downplay extreme violence against women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 11:57 AM
8

Seconded! It was me and it sucked. Don’t do it ladies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 03:56 PM
7

That’s… well horrific!! I’m so sorry for what you went through. It’s not like your story is unusual either. I know someone who’s rap.ist admitted to it in writing and they still wouldn’t prosecute him. Then there’s the British woman who was gang rap.ed in Greece I think and the police charged her with making a false allegation and she was actually found guilty despite overwhelming evidence of what happened to her. Men act like animals and the law gives them protection for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 03:53 PM
146

But also they’re losing that with early exposure to porn. Then they just lose the ability to see women as human and become trainee abusers. But it’s not women that put porn everywhere online for children to find.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 11:14 AM
48

It’s probably been done before but there’s a lot of newbies and I’d be interested in an individual post about this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 11:12 AM
2

He was very angry. It was delicious.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 08:34 AM
6

Yay! 😍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 11:04 PM
15

Somebody please think of the fish!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 11:01 PM
57

Dying!! Men worry about women using them for dinners. Women should be worrying about men using them for their bed sheets!! LMAO!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 10:54 PM
10

Can I have high standards, firm boundaries and attitude please?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 10:50 PM
20

I do worry about that the most and that’s why I think the critical thinking is the most important thing I will ever teach them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 12:26 PM
11

Yeah, I hate orgasms. Said no woman ever…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 11:57 AM
7

Happened to me! 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 11:50 AM
73

I’ve had that same high. It’s awesome. Soul cleansing!! I also love the way you used “my goddess” and I’m stealing it so much!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 11:34 AM
19

This guys thinking: She replied!! That means we’ve got a “connection”. I better let her know that I’m what I think she thinks a perfect man is based off all the p.orn I watch. Damn! It didn’t work. I could go off with my tail between my legs but no, I’ll try the song again. 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 11:28 AM
42

I have 2 young sons and I left their abusive father so I’m already undoing some bad effects that he left with them. But it’s all about you and the type of mother you are. My boys are wonderful and empathetic. I’m going to be teaching them about the damage porn can do and I’m already teaching them to be critical in their thinking. I teach them about people and how the world works and how it should work. I encourage them to express their feelings and I teach them to listen to others. Overall I pla…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 11:09 AM
51

Image! He wasn’t as famous then.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 10:59 AM
58

That’s horrific. It’s a miracle she made it out alive. I hope she moves far away or he’ll still kill her if he gets a chance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 10:57 AM
36

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Yeah, you need better friends. Are your friends mainly male? If so, they’re not your friends, they’re all predators waiting for an opportunity with you. Do your friends care about you? Or do they care what you can do for them? I think you need to spend time working on your self and figuring out what you want out of life. Don’t just go along with things because it’s what everyone else is doing. You’ve just come out of your childhood where you’re desperate t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 10:47 AM
21

Won’t somebody please think of the men!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/21 08:49 PM
103

Can we start a gofundme for this guy? Sorry, I meant, can we start a gofundme to yeet this guy?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/21 06:15 PM
72

We don’t encourage violence against men. We don’t encourage sexual assault. We don’t live in a matriarchal society. We don’t get joy and sexual pleasure out of men’s fear. We don’t go insane and shoot innocent strangers and children because no one’s touched our vageen. We don’t form armies and take over countries to implement matriarchal religions that take away the basic rights of men. We just want autonomy over our own bodies and lives. We just want to not be emotionally, physically, financial…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/21 02:30 PM
11

True actually! The multiculturalism works both ways.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 05:33 PM
7

Also you could ask your dr for anti sickness tablets. Take them 20-30 minutes before your painkillers and it will help you keep them down.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 05:14 PM
13

I live here and it’s not my f**king favourite. Probably New Zealand. We have so much potential but we waste it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 05:06 PM
19

As for his name, Britain is very multicultural so a name doesn’t tell you anything anymore. It’s probably more telling that she was a woc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 05:04 PM
22

In general there has been a rise in acid attacks in the UK in the last few years: https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/articles/4Zztl6VZwXNXCn7fXDwb2YR/why-are-acid-attacks-on-the-rise
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 05:02 PM
179

We have to exist in a paradox of both having and not having sex. Schrödinger’s vagina, if you will.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 04:56 PM
42

It’s probably “why are you using up your emotions on other people when I’m here, a man!” And other such bullshit. My ex was the same. He consumed my compassion for him but ridiculed me for showing it to other people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 04:11 PM
22

I’ve just signed up to be a member and waiting for approval. I’ve been here a few weeks now and I’m enjoying the podcast too. I’m sure I’ll love it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 04:06 PM
48

I couldn’t find a motive either. It could be rejection or it could just be being a successful woman, or both. She could have just pointed out he was wrong over something. These sickos will find a reason anywhere they can.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 03:18 PM
7

Not an age thing either. I know a kid in his 20s and he’s autistic and already grown into a fine, thoughtful and caring man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 02:32 PM
8

I agree with the majority of the comments. It’s a balance and a good vetting strategy as a whole but watch out for the ones that will try and take advantage of that. I was very similar to you when I was younger, I lost my virginity later in life and I used to tell men that I wasn’t interested in casual sex rather than the marriage thing but if they stayed around after the no sex rule the marriage thing came up. It worked until it didn’t and I fell prey to a narcissist who used the marriage promi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 02:12 PM
147

Brit here, they changed the law recently due to an increase in attacks and now they can be sentenced up to life in prison, which is 25 years but they’d still only do half of it so a maximum sentence of 12 years, IF he gets the full sentence. It’s ridiculous. I hate the way our court system works here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 01:33 PM
27

I think a really determined narcissist will do anything they can get you under their control. There’s no need to feel any shame for past mistakes when literally the whole world is complicit in making you not see them as mistakes in the first place. But that is exactly why the spaces like FDS are so important and there needs to be so many more available to women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 12:37 PM
46

Thanks!! I thought I was already depressed. Found a whole new level here!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 12:29 PM
22

Holy shit that’s terrifying!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 12:25 PM
14

“Condensated” nail varnish just killed me! ☠️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 11:11 AM
7

You’re comment made me laugh and a very weird noise came out. Sounded like a duck 🦆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 11:06 AM
24

“Dr Ramani like she’s our best friend” love it 😝
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 10:07 AM
344

Being British, I’m watching this stuff on the news alongside the story about the Plymouth shooting and I’m wondering why no news channel seems to be pointing out that those stories are about the same goddamn thing. Patriarchy, misogyny and abuse of women. Male entitlement. Control of women. I knew when Trump was elected that it signalled the start of (more) bad times for women but got shouted down by men of course. But I was right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 09:56 AM
46

Thanks for the update. I read your original post the other day and I thought she was ridiculous then but JEEZ!!! I’m so glad you’re able to see exactly what she’s doing and you dealt with her so well!!! The “eMoTiONaL” stuff was insane! It’s exactly how my narc ex dealt with any issues I brought up with him. Just watch out for the smear campaign against you now she’s going. She might try and make up lies about you to any mutual friends. She sounds quite narcissistic and the trick with them is to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 09:42 AM
23

That’s what I got. It’s like they think he deserved a sacrificial virgin or something!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 10:07 AM
1

So much this!! All day…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 12:16 PM
7

Yet again, this is why I love this sub. I think I’ve just realised I’m a type A too. Not that I care that much about the label but it proves something to me. When I met my ex he was about to complete a degree but he just stopped trying and it took me years to figure out why. This is why!!! He figured out I’m type A and to a NVM that was like a winning lottery ticket. Why did he have to do anything when he had me to do everything for him? He deliberately didn’t gain anything his entire life becau…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 12:02 PM
10

Awesomeness!! I approve. I’ve been dancing by myself a lot lately too. I’m also developing a new wicked sense of humour. I might even try out an open mike at a comedy club. I pick ME!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 11:31 AM
4

I’ve had this said to me almost verbatim but in a relationship context. I don’t know enough about the situation to know why he’s doing it but it certainly comes across as a manipulation tactic. Whether it’s deliberate or not. It could be you feel doubt because it’s come from 2 different people now but maybe it’s just that you are a strong woman and that makes certain (most) types of people uncomfortable. So they will neg you to try and bring you down a peg. Whatever the cause it’s basically mani…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 11:28 AM
30

Me too!! I love how many women come here to see how insane it is and stay. 😝
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 11:05 AM
27

I did a similar post myself when I joined. I’ve seen a lot more since too! I think it’s lovely to see all these women helping each other and often actually saving the lives of women in bad situations now and in the future. Reddit saved my life and FDS has saved me from ever putting myself into those situations ever again. I love it here. It’s like coming home to the mothership for me. I had this mentality and it was conditioned and abused out of me at my weakest point and I’m so happy to have it…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 11:04 AM
79

Or abuse you. Sometimes they just get angry that you dared become sick and they get violent. Pretty sure the logic here is that they can beat you well again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 10:56 AM
17

Swore I’d never buy Reddit coins but this needs highlighting so badly right now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 02:00 AM
27

Bahahaha!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 12:14 AM
94

Can this post be made part of the handbook or something? Or into a leaflet and handed out to all girls as they reach puberty? Really could have done with this 20 years ago.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 09:19 AM
4

No, I had/know someone who had one experience that proves this is wrong for everyone! Ah, anecdotal evidence that isn’t worth the paper it’s not printed on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 01:25 PM
61

Maybe in the future there will be discount sperm available, a bit like how they have a wonky vegetable section in the supermarket these days.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 12:31 PM
42

I feel the same. I was talking to my brother and I was going to say that he had no idea how good it felt to be able to take up space online and say what I actually want to say without being worried about the fallout. Then I remembered he’s male and has no idea.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 12:23 PM
75

I’ve been where this woman is and it’s awful. I didn’t attempt but I knew I was close enough so I walked into a hospital instead in front of a bus. It saved my life. Luckily some part of me knew it wasn’t me that was the problem. If you want you can dm me the original post and I’ll see if there’s anything I can say to help her. I’m not hoping for much but 18 months ago I was in hell and put a post on an advice sub and now my life is infinitely better. Now I’m here and it just keeps improving. Jo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 12:10 PM
14

Same thing happened to me. A “feminist” sub and a permanent ban for one innocuous comment. I politely questioned it and got banned from messaging the mods. I think they see we’re in here from our profiles and just blanket ban us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 11:54 AM
4

I paid for my own engagement ring and my family paid for my wedding ring. 👑🤡 But I finally got rid of the man. I guess I thought I was taking charge of my own life but I actually was just letting him train me to be happy with disappointment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 11:47 AM
12

Nope. You’ve got it all right there. Essentially that is the point of the book that he overcomes his prejudice and she overcomes her pride. I don’t know whether I would say Elizabeth needs to give up her pride. If she was really FDS she wouldn’t but given the pickme time it was written in I think we can take the values without following the exact formula.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 01:34 PM
53

That makes me want to cry. My daughter is growing up and it looks like she’s going to be stunning and that worries me so much.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 01:22 PM
32

They said get out now. Some things are obvious to most people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 01:19 PM
36

I checked it out. The post has been deleted but the vast majority said run away fast and there was even a recommendation for FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 01:17 PM
47

I don’t think it’s even just a cultural thing, it happens everywhere. It’s just more open in some cultures than others.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 12:53 PM
38

Not only that but it can take a terrible toll on your physical health too. I don’t know if my ex caused my illness but he definitely made it worse. Kicking him out improved my physical health more than anything any doctor could have done for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 12:47 PM
49

Probably because of the sheer amount of negging
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 12:30 PM
88

It’s true and there are many men in LTR that refuse to accept responsibility. I have an older male family member that I looked up to my whole life. Then I found out that his wife had terrible difficulties during pregnancy and another child could have killed her, as could getting her tubes tied. So she asked him to get a vasectomy but he refused. They haven’t had sex for almost 50 years and they’re still married. Didn’t go back to it after she reached menopause because why would you after he’s do…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 12:29 PM
142

I’m going again because I can’t even!! She’s actually stunning. Unless she has the personality of Hitler, she should be able to get any man she wants without having to flash him first.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 11:49 AM
111

Christ on a bike!! Literally just put nudes on your public FB profile with close up shots of your vulva. You’ll definitely get a man then. Shouldn’t need the /s but just in case sarcasm
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 11:46 AM
29

It was ALL spaghetti. Everything he wanted to touch me with. shudders
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 02:14 PM
29

Luckily, being attacked by tigers every day means he’s got one, two days left, tops.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 11:41 AM
82

I’m sexually compatible with people willing to wait until I’m ready to have sex. I have a low body count and only have had sex in relationships but there was one guy I almost slept with. He wasn’t my usual type but I knew he liked me and he was a nice guy. Not attractive, not ugly. We’d made out a few times and it was ok (I was young!) but not great then one time it started to go further and I stopped it because it became clear very quickly that we were not going to be sexually compatible. I gav…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 11:31 AM
55

That’s what I took from it too. The last one was just as bad if not worse because she thinks she’s won some prize but we know he’s thinking about those nude models while he’s pounding her and he doesn’t give a 💩 if she cums.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 10:57 AM
17

I keep thinking we need FDS versions of everything and the FDS Daily News headlines would be something special.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 11:04 PM
49

My ex would try to do that and got angry when I freaked the fuck out and practically punched him off me. GTFOH with that shit!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 02:37 PM
29

But men are ViSuAl!!! Yeah but I’m pretty sure masturbation wasn’t invented on the day that the first person drew a female body. I bet they were able to do it all on their own before that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 11:21 AM
59

That therapist needs reporting. Why is it your vagina’s job to teach him anything?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 08:58 AM
50

Same. 10 years of supporting him financially, emotionally and physically and when I became ill and needed just a fraction of that support back I wasn’t trying hard enough and he became physically abusive.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 08:56 AM
7

I agree, I found that very entertaining, please post more!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 05:56 PM
3

My ex would have to show me how he hurt himself by enacting the same injury on me. Like, he’d bang his head and hit me in the head so I could understand his pain. I don’t know why I put up with the POS for so long.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 05:45 PM
14

And that’s the difference! I used to be fine making phone calls but as I was being abused I lost my confidence and he would do it for me. Now he’s gone and the anxiety has gone and I’m fine doing everything myself. I’m not scouting dating apps looking for another man to make phone calls for me!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 02:27 PM
35

Bad choice of words but I agree! Sorry. I’m so sorry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 01:27 PM
17

THIS! This all day and all night and Michael Jackson.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 01:24 PM
19

Anyone who does will suffer. The thing with narcs is they’re completely fake people and miserable under all the lies. There’s no winning with them. There’s only getting the hell away from them and never looking back. One thing I found very interesting though was once my ex was no longer around, all the people I thought loved him started to tell me what they REALLY thought.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 12:50 PM
24

gets busy downloading images of honey badgers I think I’m going to need to make an imgur account. It’s going to be a busy Sunday!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 12:14 PM
24

I think my first would involve a honey badger. I’ve actually looked into those sites already so it might become part of my levelling up strategy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 12:03 PM
27

I’d think your boss was my stbx husband except he couldn’t hold down a job. He’s definitely a narcissist. All the traits are there. Inability to apologise, the charm, low emotional intelligence but it’s actually high enough for them to manipulate people’s emotions and belittle you. Being in a relationship with one is pretty much how you described but worse because you’re stuck with it and you’re their special project that they put the most time and effort into destroying. The way you describe ho…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 12:01 PM
129

I’m really thinking about starting an FDS inspired line of clothing. If I had the talent I definitely would.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 11:43 AM
26

I’m really hoping this means we’re going to see our numbers going up. Brilliant article. Thanks for sharing!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 11:36 AM
34

That’s what I got from it too. “Hey ladies, give me tips to make my home look more appealing to women so they’re more likely to have sex with me and not see the dull unimaginative person I really am” is the best case scenario. Worst is “I need women’s help to decorate my rape lair”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/21 04:11 PM
90

I don’t like the royals but I always felt sorry for that poor woman. I still believe they killed her just as she was finally getting happy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/21 04:06 PM
24

I’m so happy for you that you found FDS and in the nick of time too! I’m gen x and I have had a lot of pickme friends in the past. I’m not going to be having any ever again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/21 04:03 PM
93

Ha ha! Me too! It’s awesome
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/21 03:42 PM
24

IRL Homer Simpson!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 11:54 PM
11

Yeah she’s got great energy and there’s a lot of hope for her in the future but she put up with the crap for too long. I was talking to a guy I met online and he was nice enough and there were no direct red flags but I realised after months that he’d barely told me anything about himself. I was going to explain to him why but I don’t need to. He knows. I told him what my expectations and boundaries were. No further communication needed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 01:46 PM
4

It can! And hi! It’s you again! 👋 Every time I think, this post is awesome, who’s the OP, it’s you, or, I agree with that comment so much, yep, it’s you again!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 12:59 PM
20

Awesome post!! Thank you. I love a bit of science and I’ll try and add my thoughts although I’m tired this morning so apologies if I get anything wrong. I’m a highly empathetic person and I’ve learned over the years that I’m a prime target for being taken advantage of if I allow it to happen and don’t protect myself. I see love in a similar way. Women in general do fall in love more easily so we therefore should protect ourselves more to prevent being taken advantage of. I also love this fact ab…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 11:52 AM
93

This happened to me. My (stbx) husband knew I was exhausted and very unwell but he decided to put some chicken in the oven. Then he woke me and told me to take it out when the oven beeped at the other end of the house. It didn’t even register in my exhausted state, I went straight back to sleep and he went out. He came home early luckily and also screamed me awake for nearly burning the house down. Obviously my fault and nothing mentioned about the fact that he almost killed me. If I had died I …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 11:37 AM
50

I don’t know, you might be being too harsh on chimps and Neanderthals! 🤣🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 11:20 AM
55

Also it’s very clear that when they do have sex he is not being receptive to her sexual needs and it is literally a chore for her. Who can blame her for not wanting that!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 02:08 PM
125

Also it’s very clear that when they do have sex he is not being receptive to her sexual needs and it is literally a chore for her. Who can blame her for not wanting that!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 02:08 PM
24

Thanks! That is very sad and very true.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 04:10 PM
21

Woo hoo! Saved!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 04:04 PM
28

Does anyone know what event sparked this ban? I’d love to know if was them crying over an FDS post
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 04:02 PM
4

Does anyone know what caused the ban in “that” subreddit? I’m hoping it was them discussing us. 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 01:42 PM
1

I wonder if that’s what got them banned?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 01:40 PM
42

This was the best news I heard this morning!! Lmao
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 12:45 PM
26

Love your energy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 02:45 PM
25

You can block the suicide bot if you need
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 02:00 PM
15

Exactly!!!!! But let's ignore all that and just focus on the erection. LMAO but it's also pathetically depressing
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 01:59 PM
8

Done, thank you! I'm trying to keep the male lurkers and what they want in mind with my phrasing and that is perfect.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 01:57 PM
10

Love that!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 01:51 PM
39

There's an advert on UK tv at the moment for Numan, men's products and it really makes me laugh because it says they will do blood tests for ED and find out the cause if it's heart disease or diabetes. Because the only reason men would do anything about those major health issues is if it affects their peepees. By men, for men, telling men what they know about men. Hilarious!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 01:49 PM
35

Go you!! Love your username btw
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 01:45 PM
10

Gone with be able to enjoy more sex. Hopefully that does it but any other suggestions, let me know!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 01:44 PM
17

Thanks for the tip! Maybe I should change it to men get to enjoy more sex? Or enjoy sex more often?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 01:41 PM
17

I'm so so sorry you're going through that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 01:37 PM
137

I get those, it's just the scrotes dying mad. I think it means you've done an excellent FDS post if you get one. Congratulations!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 01:32 PM
3

This is exactly why there is no porn in FDS world!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 01:28 PM
10

I’ve been thinking the same thing for a while now. Going into nursing I knew I would have to have a partner to support me because there’s no way to earn enough money to live while training, or once you’re actually working. We need living wages and reasonable house prices and definitely a stop on private investors buying up housing stock. We are heading for a major housing crisis. I could write so much on this subject. It didn’t work btw, partner never supported me and became covertly abusive so …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 10:09 AM
5

I’m so going to be using “Did he shit his pants? Then no, you can’t change him” as my mantra for life!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/21 09:30 AM
20

Just say “my boobs don’t talk but if they did they’d tell you to f**k off!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/21 09:22 AM
11

I honestly don’t see any difference between pornography and prostitution. It’s paying a woman for sex that she wouldn’t necessarily agree to without a monetary benefit. With porn she just gets paid more (sometimes) because more men get to benefit from the prostitution situation being recorded.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 03:36 PM
8

I don’t think it is necessarily more prevalent, just more reported.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 03:28 PM
8

Wombworld?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 03:18 PM
9

Ha! I got banned from a feminism sub for saying something was bad. Permanent ban and instantly muted for no reason. I’m starting to think they’re just banning accounts linked to this sub tbh but I really couldn’t care less.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 03:13 PM
15

I haven’t found any yet, other than FDS and my own brain but if I find anything I’ll post it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 01:23 PM
44

Coffee has been synonymous with sex for generations, do you want to come in for “coffee”? Now it’s like going on a coffee date is the easiest way for many LVM and pick mes to find out if they’re sexually compatible. People offering coffee are essentially just offering sex. FDS women need to forget about the sex part of it because all men can offer sex!! HVM will offer love instead and it’s learning to differentiate between the language of love and the language of sex and sex masquerading as love…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 11:52 AM
15

Thank you for this post!!! You write very well and this is going in my collection of online wisdom. I wish I could tell my younger self the same too but I have a young daughter and I am passing as much of this to her as I can.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 11:33 AM
12

Therapy is like any other type of medicine in that doing the right thing in the wrong way or the wrong thing for the right reasons can have a disastrous effect. Trust your gut.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 11:26 AM
22

I hate this for you so much!! 🤗
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 11:17 AM
33

Thank you!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 11:08 AM
52

I couldn’t agree with this more. It’s one of the reasons I feel FDS suits me so well because I’ve always followed my own version of the FDStrategy anyway but after a long term abusive relationship I found I was becoming sexually dysfunctional. Thankfully I then found FDS and I’ve actually been able to cure that dysfunction and go back to enjoying love based sexual fantasies that get me off far better than fantasising about anything you might find in porn. If it can be this much better on my own,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 10:57 AM
402

Omg! The people calling HER a leech?!?!? That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. Poor woman. I’m disabled and I’m so glad I know now that I still have value and I’d rather be alone forever than put up with any of this 💩 anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 10:44 AM
16

I think it’s all about how they question the boundary. You can agree and ask for clarity if you’re HV to be sure you understand and fulfil the requirement. More LV people will be more dismissive and try and find the loopholes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/21 02:42 PM
26

I looked it up. She was paid $300k for Wonder Woman compared to Caville being paid $14 million for his first superman film, despite Wonder Woman earning over $100 million more worldwide. For 1984 she was able to ask for more but still only got $10 million.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/21 02:14 PM
13

Beautifully put. Hugs xxx
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/21 02:02 PM
11

Keanu? Only truly attractive HVM I can suggest. Lol!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/21 01:58 PM
38

Yup. She’s pretty much nailed it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/21 02:25 PM
36

Women are in a worldwide narcissistic relationship with men
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/21 09:03 AM
29

Yup! I ended up being pressured into another one and ended up with twins. Apparently that was my fault too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 11:51 AM
14

Thank you for this! I just wanted to add in a warning about going to the other extremes. I see a lot of women in the comments having similar experiences with men who are “hard-working” and I’m grateful for the warning because after years with a useless non-working man(child) I was in danger of settling for a working man, just because they would be the opposite of my ex. Watch out for men who seem to have the opposite qualities of men you’ve had bad experiences with. Vet, vet, vet!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 11:04 AM
49

I’ve got three kids and seriously, y’all need to have kids before you decide whether you have kids or you won’t know whether you want kids or not! 😛 If anyone wants to borrow mine and be put off forever, you’re very welcome…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 10:20 AM
13

I’m so sorry, that’s awful. Depending on where you are, you might be able to call the clinic or hospital where you were due to have the procedure and ask to speak to the head nurse. You can discuss your issues and ask what they could do to help you get through it. They are used to people having anxiety over medical procedures and should be able to do whatever you need them to help you. You still decide after that if you’re willing to do it. Patients have rights and if you know what they are you …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 10:13 AM
3

Just being here should help your confidence grow! 😊 It’s actually amazing. I’m even having better sex (with myself 😉) now because I’ve given up any degrading fantasies that I just thought I enjoyed but didn’t. Turns out it’s much better without them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 01:37 PM
4

Ubersucks!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 01:33 PM
4

Ooh! I’m a big fan of anthropology, that must have been amazing! I was thinking of writing an anthropology/science based post about this subject too. (Her name wasn’t Kathy was it? If so, I know who that it 😉)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 01:32 PM
3

I had to because it’s such a glaring example of how bad it can be to have poor boundaries that you don’t even stick to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 01:27 PM
6

I’ve thought it might be ok if it weren’t that men are the ones who benefit massively from those situations
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 01:18 PM
8

True, the men just have plausible deniability. I swear officer, she was enjoying the choking right up until she died…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 01:16 PM
7

You might be right but there was enough ambiguity in the question that she felt too uncomfortable answering it. If it was part of the play, then why not answer? Add to that his anger with her when she refused. Not placating her saying it’s just part of the role play but actual anger that a woman wouldn’t submit to him completely to the point that he kicked her out rather than carrying on with sex! We have to be very careful about giving men the benefit of the doubt because that is exactly where …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 12:55 PM
12

It’s only a matter of time for this guy and nothing will be done until it’s too late anyway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 12:49 PM
6

I just feel ultimately horrified at how normalised this is. This poor woman needs help really. This is exactly why we need these spaces like FDS so desperately because look at the alternative when women learn to get all their validation from men and men learn how to give it from obsessively watching porn. There is no one to explain to either of these two how wrong this is so when lines get crossed into actual crimes they don’t understand how it happened.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 12:47 PM
13

It is like being in a cult I think and these depraved men prey on women like this. It’s an absolute fact that if misogyny wasn’t such a huge problem and actually getting worse then a lot of abuse situations wouldn’t happen. This is how apologists for this kind of abuse as “sexual empowerment” are actually causing physical harm to women and young girls.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 12:43 PM
27

I’m in my 40s and I really don’t think this was as much of an acceptable thing among women until 50 Shades seemed to turn millions of women into complete fools. I’m tired of how many times I get asked if I’ve read/watched it and the shock from women when I say I never have/never will.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 12:14 PM
11

Even the TW was just possible abuse. No idea what’s actually happened to her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 12:10 PM
37

Porn. By porn. They are literally training a new generation of young adult women that if they don’t subject themselves to these porn fantasies then they will be classed as a high maintenance demanding shrew and there will just be another pickme eagerly waiting to get strangled in their place if they say no. I fucking hate 50 Shades of Grey. It’s this generation’s Pretty Woman. Smdh. Edit, a word
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 12:07 PM
9

I think that’s the scariest part. That she can gaslight herself so very badly. I’m actually quite astounded at the line she finally drew at not being prostituted out. That’s the lowest bar ever!! Oh and she confirms in the comments that it wasn’t a “play” part of the “sex” (if you can even call it sex) she honestly believed he was genuinely asking to be her pimp.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 12:01 PM
25

High maintenance women not putting up with being beaten and strangled are so dEmAnDiNg!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 11:43 AM
24

There was a good comment on this saying she waded through a forest of red flags even before she was in real danger
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 11:41 AM
31

Feeling it! Pissed off hetero women who wish they were bi! Lol!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 10:25 AM
29

All of this. We are just animals after all and I love getting into the science of it too. Like we developed conscious thought in order to make choices between which of our instincts to follow. Which proves that all men have the ability to choose not to follow their instincts, but with their sexual instincts they are told time and again that they have no control over it and women have to control that (themselves!) for men. It’s just 🐂💩 We all get to choose.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 10:13 AM
61

Oh apparently a big part of what she did wrong was not having a safe word. 🤦🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 10:01 AM
84

There was even history, their previous situationship had gone “horribly wrong” already but she gave him another chance. I know from experience that if you forgive those types of men they just think even less of you and will definitely treat you worse for it. But society teaches us to forgive men and women are literally being trained for abuse. Now it’s getting so much worse and more dangerous for women than when I was younger.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 09:17 AM
3

This woman is my HERO! Love her energy!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 09:05 AM
178

This is what misogyny and porn sickness is doing to women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 08:40 AM
7

When the internalised misogyny is so bad being literally beaten, attempted to be forced into prostitution and threatened with death makes her just “uncomfortable” and not screaming for her own damn safety. My blood is ice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 08:39 AM
179

Either that or they think that we should have sex with them with actually zero effort on their part! I went on OLD for a total of 3 weeks and never again. It was hilarious how entitled and angry they were. I actually told one guy that I’m not a pizza that he can order on his phone and get delivered to his house in 30 minutes or less! 🤣🤪🐵
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 06:46 PM
4

Saying “I don’t want to have sex with you” is not abuse. Simple.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 12:56 PM
122

“I’ve got her so well trained that she doesn’t expect me to do anything” he grinned
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 08:59 PM
10

All this advice right here! ⬆️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 06:43 PM
49

I actually googled to see if it was a clear indication of psychopathy! There’s no clear cut science to it but this guy’s handwriting even scares me! We recognise danger in the oldest part of our brain that doesn’t have the ability to send that information coherently to the language part of our brain but it can communicate with your stomach and nervous system. That’s why you should ALWAYS listen to that gut feeling. It’s literally your brain telling you you’re in danger. Edit, a letter
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 06:23 PM
23

He has to live with a guy because they are the only ones who will put up with how much of a slob they are
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 12:26 PM
10

I also don’t see how that is conducive to pleasant sex for a man. I wouldn’t want to go down on someone who’s dick tasted like domestos!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 11:51 AM
50

Snorted at “meeting a vagina face-to-face!!! I’m really starting to think that table turning is the only way forward for us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 03:39 AM
33

The irony of that name which is obviously appealing to men on a product bought solely by women is staggering! Edit to add: What’s next? Little penis shaped tampons called Tampricks?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 03:35 AM
31

We have a winner! 🛎 🛎 🛎
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 03:33 AM
20

Let’s hope this works
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 03:25 AM
20

Ikr! I can provide the full picture if anyone wants it. That small sliver doesn’t do it justice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 03:22 AM
59

I did have to think how many pictures I could realistically fit on the women’s side. I also thought I was being generous by having two lynx products!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 03:21 AM
10

It also makes sense that men are not bigger and stronger because they are “superior” in any way, they just had to evolve that way to move around and spread their genes while competing with other males. Domestic violence is a patriarchal and psychological construct, not a biological inevitability.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 03:19 AM
10

Bahahahaha! You just described my stbx father in law and I’m dying!!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 03:00 AM
6

This reminded me of Ray Winston’s jagged finger nails in Black Widow and they zoom in on a tapping finger. Christ! He’s supposed to be the most powerful man in the world surrounded by women and he couldn’t even get a set of nail clippers? I know there are worse things his character does but that really annoyed me! 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 02:59 AM
37

I wasn’t sure I’d be able to make the wipes work in the meme so I was looking for back up images and found a feminine wipes brand named Honey Pot and I 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 02:52 AM
26

Here it is!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 02:22 AM
16

Imma borrow this pic and make a meme
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 01:56 AM
98

Cackling at “broken sunburnt thumbs”!!! 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 01:25 AM
60

Ikr! Some people! Tsk!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 08:05 PM
24

Laughing so hard at this! 🤣🤣🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 10:32 AM
13

I think this stands as a good cautionary tale for why we should never overlook those red flags. Especially the younger FDS members. Many men know they give off red flags and become experts at diminishing them and convincing people that the issue no longer exists. OP said he pestered for nudes but then seemed to change “overnight”. He didn’t. He just learned what her boundaries were and adapted his behaviour to reflect her values. He’s still pretending he has those values and that’s why it’s not …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 08:25 AM
1

My ex has that T-shirt!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 04:06 PM
6

He sounds like a narcissist to me. It could also explain why you missed any red flags earlier because they are the experts at reflecting your personality back to you so you think you have a connection with them. Now he has you trapped he can abuse you more and more. It just won’t be sexual because he’s gay. But it will be emotional, verbal, financial and possibly even physical abuse. Look at how he adapted his personality for his parents! Best option is to grey rock him and get out of there as s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 03:54 PM
16

Yoinks!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 03:27 PM
61

Really need to stop letting adult men be treated like idiot children! This is why to “woman up” is so much more impressive.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 10:52 AM
19

Maybe we should just start giving out blatantly terrible advice? First things first, book yourself in for a vaginaplasty and take off a millimetre for every guy you’ve had sex with. Next, give him full access to your bank account and he can just give you an allowance from it. Don’t get upset if he watches loads of porn and/or shags other women/your mum. Keep your legs permanently open to him, even when you’re cooking/cleaning/ill/giving birth or he’ll leave you for his side piece/your mum. Get c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 10:31 AM
8

Seconded!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 09:49 AM
8

This and other women who think a boundary like not having people your partner has slept with share your house is dEmAnDiNg!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 09:37 AM
36

As someone who has worked in nursing homes and with the elderly, I can say it is the men who usually die alone. There are far more bitter lonely old men dying with no one around them. The women have their friends and family around them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 05:56 AM
24

I’m never alone with my cat! 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 05:48 AM
55

That’s…… horrifying!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 09:41 PM
18

Ah! Hello my life. I almost didn’t notice you there!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 05:03 PM
149

Omg!! So he’s rich enough to have a bangpad but not nice enough to get a bangmaid so he uses his mother instead? That’s gross! Edit: Thanks for the upvotes!! Just thought I’d edit to clarify I’m not implying he’s banging the mother, just using her as a maid. Lol!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 09:00 AM
5

That made me chortle!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 08:22 AM
37

sigh Because it’s not about sex, it’s not baseball references of sexual assault. It’s about control. It’s about putting someone in a situation and scaring the ever living shit out of them so they can feel powerful and make someone else feel powerless. It’s despicable however you do it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 01:17 AM
3

This killed me!! 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 06:38 PM
29

Bahahahahaha!!! Photo saved. Love it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 06:05 PM
9

Spoilers ahead, Captain Marvel, Black widow and Loki I’m a huge Marvel fan and I really enjoyed the Black Widow movie. I see what a lot of commenters are saying about parts of it but at least there is a lot of feminism in there and the Marvel franchise is originally targeted at men. It’s as if they’re only just realising that women like it too and they’re finally trying to appeal to what they think we want. Captain Marvel was done brilliantly and I found that her superpower was a metaphor for wo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 11:47 AM
42

I used to work in a nursing home and a man used to come in every day and eat his wife’s (the patient!) food and she had dementia so she couldn’t tell us so there’s not much I won’t believe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/21 04:58 PM
8

Yeah, this! I was proud of my narc ex in public because he would act like the world’s nicest guy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/21 03:25 PM
12

Here, I have transcribed the whole book for you: Just say fuck you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/21 03:05 PM
8

From another perspective, I already have children from a NVM (-VM) and I’m now sterile and any relationship I have I won’t be bringing any “biological value”. But that doesn’t mean I don’t deserve a HVM. I deserve it because I’m a HVW and I’m still levelling up. Doesn’t any human deserve someone who is willing to bring the same things to a relationship that they are? Maybe your concern is that it feels unequal to have that mindset if you’re not “bringing the babies”, but it’s not. We’re still no…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/21 03:01 PM
89

HE suggested they go out to a restaurant! It looks like a shit test to me. Only 4 months in and they’ve had to combine then separate finances, then he pulls this crap to see if he can still spend his money and then spend “their” money. What’s his is his and what’s hers is his. Of course he’s angry with her! She didn’t go along with his control test! He even petulantly throws in that SHE should pay for HIS therapy to fix his entitlement. Omg the audacity!! I really hope she divorces him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/21 02:46 PM
24

You’re doing the right thing. I’m moving soon and I’ve already heard through family that my cousin (who abandoned me when I was a new mother in an abusive relationship and is still with her rapist, wife/child beater, cheating husband but I kicked mine out) is planning to try and monopolise my time because I’ll be closer and I’m just gonna nope right out of that one!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/21 01:11 PM
188

Honestly, three months is generous. It’s the bare minimum for us to work out if they might actually murder us. But we’re unreasonable…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 10:15 PM
19

I really think we need a website, something like dontdatehim.com where women can search for names, pictures and locations of men they’re potentially dating to make sure they’re not worthless pieces of 💩
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 08:42 PM
27

Then it was actually a bluff to try and threaten you into accepting his control. You were supposed to panic and go running back. Well done for carrying it through!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 07:44 PM
62

I do. They don’t think we should be ALLOWED to divorce them!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 07:18 PM
17

We married the same damn man!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 11:21 AM
74

It’s funny but it’s also scary. My ex tried to do this to me. I was struggling with disabilities (because he was abusing me) and he literally said that I should just let him make every decision for me. What I eat, what I wear, when I sleep. Everything. He actually thought that was the best thing for me. F**king tw@!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 11:18 AM
33

This is why we need we need more women only spaces irl and online
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 08:53 PM
2

Literally the exact same thing with mine. *eyeroll
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 08:15 PM
6

I love that book. They don’t get angry when they lose control of themselves, they get angry when they lose control over people, usually women. This guy has just realised that women are becoming more aware of the precursors to domestic violence and he doesn’t want to lose his “nice guy” label so he pretends to change but in reality he’s probably just become better at being controlling without using violence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 06:35 PM
8

That’s very true. I know I used to minimise what my NVMex did to me but while I was planning my escape he repeatedly pushed a door into my head so I realised I just had to go for it right away or he could end up killing me. The very reason they get away with it for so long and so often is because we’re trained to minimise their behaviour. This just shows that they minimise it themselves too, whether they’re aware of it or not, or pretend to be unaware of it. The majority still think they deserve…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 06:28 PM
27

It shows in the inequality of it. It’s always FFM, never FMM, or even FFF or MMM or FFMM. Just FFM in the vast majority of cases.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 09:30 AM
25

“Board game couples give off an even more menacing vibe than poly couples” killed me! Lmao!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 09:27 AM
13

PSA: men don’t like it when we’re confident. LVMs will try and break it down wherever they see it. Whether he was trying to hit on you or be deliberately creepy or just make you uncomfortable, he’s just a LVM seeing a confident woman and wants to break you down however he can so it doesn’t matter. That’s obviously the only way he can get women to sleep with him. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with your response though. He just proves exactly why you have to be professional at all times. I …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 08:44 AM
34

My ex called me crazy all the time. But he was the one getting angry multiple times a day. I eventually started ensuring I stayed completely calm while “discussing” issues with him and he just would accuse me of doing it on purpose to manipulate him into being angry. So if I was emotional I was crazy and if I wasn’t then I was manipulative. Men are experts at creating situations where they can force one of two reactions and have it prepared for whichever one you do to use as evidence of what the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 08:47 AM
5

Thank you! I did it!! I said goodbye in a heartfelt but professional way. I didn’t make him have to deal with my feelings he was just happy I was showing my appreciation. He even modestly turned it back on me again. I’m going to miss him but I’m not going to settle for anyone who’s not at least as high value as he is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 03:31 PM
2

Noted!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 11:12 AM
9

She is clearly awesome. He just wanted to disparage her to make him feel better about himself and his tiny peepee. But it didn’t work. 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 10:38 AM
43

That’s really why they should put all rapists in prison. I guarantee there would end up fewer of them. My friend had her rapist ex apologise for it in writing and they still didn’t prosecute him because there wasn’t enough “evidence”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 10:21 AM
16

I really think we need to live with our female friends more.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 09:43 AM
13

I was thinking that. Maybe a separate sub just for general chat. Alternatively I’m trying to get my BFF into FDS. She’s a single pick me who’s giving up on men, she’s prime for the taking! Lol!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 09:42 AM
4

I love you!! I’m so taking on this way of talking to scrotes. That’s so awesome!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 09:05 AM
17

I needed this today too. I’m trying to find an appropriate way to say goodbye to a HVM I will never see again. He’s married and there’s nothing inappropriate between us, it’s like a service provider/customer relationship where I am the customer. But I was in an abusive relationship and seeing that there were real HVMs in the world in him gave me the strength to get free. As well as just being his high value self and being trustworthy in his job made an important part of my transition to getting …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 08:58 AM
94

They literally think it’s hilarious because the majority of the time it doesn’t/won’t happen to them. They lack empathy for women so it’s hysterical because they only empathise with the rapist. It’s sick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 08:29 AM
5

I am definitely going to use that quote!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 03:09 PM
12

Absolutely! I’m on the level up sub too and I’m bingeing my way through all the information like it’s a new Netflix show. I think part of it is also just being able to connect on a personal level with like minded women. Maybe something could be added into the weekly general post for people to just chat to fulfil this need instead. From personal experience I know what it’s like to feel everything is an attack against you and be constantly apologetic in advance or overly defensive and we might nee…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 04:09 PM
20

I agree. As a newbie to this sub I have told a couple of “horror” stories in the comments when it has seemed appropriate but I don’t want to just be doing that and I’ve lost interest in other subs that do that too. I can’t keep having the same conversation with women about this. I have read the rules and the sidebar and I’m working my way through the website and I’m going to start on the podcasts soon. I’m aware that I’m learning a whole new perspective and there’s going to be a lot I don’t know…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 03:47 PM
29

I’ve just had a conversation with my mum where this came up, she was talking about my stepdad (who I’ve realised recently isn’t as HVM as he likes to make out) and complaining a bit then made a comment about how he puts up with her too. So I called her out on it. She actually agreed with me once I made my point. I don’t think she’ll be divorcing him but she’s starting to understand that I’m not going to be accepting this kind of behaviour from men, or women defending men, or themselves for picki…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 03:35 PM
11

It’s a good idea for single women. I found this for you, hopefully it helps. The Doberman is a good choice but it has to be something that suits you and your needs and that you can take care of. I’d also add the Staffordshire bull terrier to this list because they are brilliantly friendly dogs when they are treated properly but vicious if your life is in danger. Quite like women!! Also, male dogs bond well with women but it’s not essential. https://scottsk9.com/9-best-dog-breeds-for-women-living…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 11:50 AM
8

I really think we need a gofundme for these kinds of things so we can ticket block the whole event
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 11:38 AM
14

This sounds like my nvm ex so much. He always had to fix/build things but he was useless at it. One time we got a tv unit we had to build and he insisted, then asked (shouted angrily) for help and just got angrier and angrier as it kept going wrong. He finished and me being me said “I don’t think the doors are supposed to stick out like that” and he ranted at me that he’d read the instructions and they must have been wrong and he’s done the best he could, then he stormed out of the house. I look…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 11:20 AM
20

Because it’s more about control than fixing things…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 11:12 AM
56

I know! I agree with it all but the amount of time, money and effort expected to keep safe from ONE man is ridiculous. This is why women should be paid more than men, just so we can afford to protect ourselves. I wanted to add, let the dog know that he makes her uncomfortable. Dogs are good at picking up cues. If you act nervous the dog will pick up on it and will be more protective. At this point I’m just thinking a highly trained German Shepard bitch that hates men is my best option.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 08:01 AM
7

I'm sure there are loads of men that do this. My ex was one. We met in university and he was very close to graduating but he never did and I couldn't figure out why for years. Recently it hit me, I was his lottery ticket! He never had to bother with the effort of anything after he met me, he just sat on his ass and expected me to do everything for him and pay for his existence. Every time I complained he would get a job for a couple of months and then lose it. I wish this sub had been around 20 …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 09:57 AM
29

This is why I love this sub so much because I'm just finding so many women that think in a similar way to me. I went through obsessive phases as a young teen, I think we all do at some point growing up. It's probably normal, especially for women when we are going through puberty and developing our personalities, and I know I just felt a lot of love and needed somewhere to "put" it. But you do grow out of it and I did and now I very rarely even know the actor's names who I find attractive and I d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 09:42 AM
24

All of this!! Just wish I knew it 20 years ago. I still have nightmares about my abusive ex’s parents regularly. They did all of the stuff mentioned above to me and more. I kicked his ass out but I’m still getting abuse and harassment from them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 09:53 AM
6

👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 09:33 AM
319

Yes, a completely reasonable one. You’re not sat at home waiting and clutching your pearls until he deigns to call or text you. You have your own life. If he asks for a last minute date, be busy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 09:16 AM
131

I can’t get over this. I’m so outraged on her behalf. The devil is in the details on this and adding them up shows how shocking it really is. 1. He surprised her with it. He just never bothered asking if she wanted a naked sculpture of herself. Like the public proposal, it was probably a shock when she received it and was manipulated into accepting it by him and others telling her how “lucky” she was that a man would put all that time and creepy effort into something like that. 2. It’s LIFE-SIZE…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 02:04 AM
41

She’d need a crane. It’s life-sized. I’m in shock and I’m going to keep saying it because I was imagining this small but heavy thing on a shelf out of sight but it’s going to be pretty goddamn noticeable!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 01:42 AM
50

I’m just going to keep saying….. he surprised her with it!!! It was displayed in front of the children!! Awkward breakfast when the kids come down and dad’s like “say good morning to your mom kids, the real one and the sexy one!” And again, life-sized!! WT ever-loving F?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 01:39 AM
111

I came to say exactly this. He controlled her with her body and her “gift” and they’re acting like he’s the one who’s lost something. I can’t even! He shouldn’t have made the damn thing - it says he surprised her with a life-sized nude sculpture of herself. He SURPRISED her!!!! He never asked her if he could make a LIFE-SIZED NUDE sculpture of her and display it in their living room for perpetuity and in front of their CHILDREN!! OMFG!!! I can’t even!!! Aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhhh!!!! I’m …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 01:34 AM
5

What’s an appropriate response to this? Thank you for telling me you’re disgusting. Please go and bang your testicles between two bricks…?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 01:13 AM
5

I’m just so sorry you went through that. Internet hugs. xxx
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 12:18 AM
18

I heard it as worms are the gardener’s best friends
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 11:47 PM
70

I was a 90s teen too and I totally get it. I was quite an aware child and I had my own version of feminism from very young but the sheer overwhelming amount of patriarchal misogyny in everything is so hard to keep out of your brain, don’t blame yourself for falling for it for a while. I still did. That’s why this sub feels like coming home to the mother ship for me. It’s what I’ve been looking for my whole life. The major “downside” (if you want to call it that) is that it’s ruining TV, movies, …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 12:20 PM
43

Totally agree with this!! I used to be friends with this guy when I was very young and I knew he liked me but I was always clear I didn’t see him like that and we would go to the cinema occasionally. One time my best girl friend came with us and he was driving and they got into an argument. He stopped the car and demanded she get out so I got out too. He sat there in shock then said he didn’t have a problem with me and we could still go. I told him no, he’d just left my 17 year old best friend o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 12:05 PM
43

A FREE coffee date? WTH? I mean, you never know, he could usually ask women out to go with him to appointments to get his ingrowing toenails removed. This could mean he thinks you’re really special!! He might only save his free McCoffee for when he thinks he’s found THE ONE!! You’re so lucky!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 11:55 AM
5

A FREE coffee date? WTH? I mean, you never know, he could usually ask women out to go with him to appointments to get his ingrowing toenails removed. This could mean he thinks you’re really special!! He might only save his free McCoffee for when he thinks he’s found THE ONE!! You’re so lucky!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 11:55 AM
14

A FREE coffee date? WTH? I mean, you never know, he could usually ask women out to go with him to appointments to get his ingrowing toenails removed. This could mean he thinks you’re really special!! He might only save his free McCoffee for when he thinks he’s found THE ONE!! You’re so lucky!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 11:55 AM
6

It’s definitely just jealousy. I’m an excellent whistler. They’d probably prefer that to hearing me try and sing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 08:31 AM
10

Damn it! I’m out. I’m a whistler. 😗
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/21 11:37 PM
73

I think I had a drink spiked at a house party when I was 18. I’d only had a couple of drinks and went up the stairs and just blacked out at the top and fell down. Luckily that probably helped me because my friends made sure I was ok, put me in bed and kept checking on me. It was so rarely talked about back then, I didn’t even realise that’s what happened until years later.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/21 08:29 AM
20

I used to not see the point of anger because my ex was constantly angry. But then I realised, it’s actually about what you do with your anger. He lets it fester and consume him and then inflicts misery on everyone around him. I flash with anger then quickly turn it into determination to make things better. Anger is a fuel, you just have to decide what you’re going to use it for.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 10:41 PM
17

Arguing with stupid is like playing chess against a pigeon. You might be winning but they’ll just 💩 on the board and knock the pieces over…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 10:30 PM
72

Anyone else hearing Phoebe from Friends “Have some pride woman for the love of god!!!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 01:14 PM
85

But, but, but…. He had lovely eyes!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 01:09 PM
25

Moving away from the area I lived with my abusive nex and starting my new life. Finally being able to get rid of the last effects of the stress his abuse caused. Eating healthier, exercising more etc Planning what to do with the next stage of my life, deciding whether to go back to my old career or start a whole new one. Finally being able to focus on myself and my needs after prioritising my kids mental health for a year since I kicked his ass out. Kids are doing really well, they’ll still be t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/21 03:56 PM
74

Agreed. My nex faked the entire person he was for 17 years! I’m never going to forgive him for that. He turned my love into a lie, took my youth and abused me and our children. Why would I forgive that? He doesn’t deserve it, he hasn’t asked for it this time. The problem was me forgiving him for so long so I will never do that again. I don’t need to forgive him for me to heal, I just need to stick to my commitment of not allowing him any space whatsoever in my life again. I’ll fix the mess he ma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/21 03:34 PM
7

I’m so happy for you! I can’t wait to do the same
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/21 10:21 AM
21

That’s exactly what abuse is. They get angry and aggressive when they lose control of others, not themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 04:57 PM
1

I got a dm at the same time saying they hoped I got the help I desperately needed. Because they made a misogynistic reply to my own comment on a post about misogyny and I called out their misogyny. I’m obviously on my way to becoming a feminist and I need help to prevent that. Lol! Too late. Edit, a word
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 04:14 PM
1

Love your username! I’m planning a Legartha tattoo to celebrate my freedom.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/21 03:57 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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