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textbasedpanda Archive

View 5 posts and 482 comments by textbasedpanda on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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12

I hate that term so much. It's not like body orifices are permanently held open just waiting for something to be inserted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 10:31 PM
3

Get engaged to yourself and buy yourself a big ass ring. But seriously it's totally fine to be harsh. Don't worry about hurting their fee-fees a lil' bit. They'll get over it and move on to the next lady soon enough.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 07:59 PM
3

"Sorry, I'm a Sagittarius. No, i'm a SAGITTARIUS."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 07:57 PM
12

Wow that's even worse when you reframe it in that way. They're even looking for a casual relationship, they're looking for a victim to manipulate and hold power over. Gender dynamics aside, that's just despicable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 07:44 PM
25

I don't get why they feel they have to "trick" LTR-minded women into casual relationships, when there are PLENTY of women who are also looking for casual hookups or FWB. Why not date someone looking for the same thing?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 04:13 PM
13

What makes him worthy of talking to you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 02:53 PM
1

I am saying sex is a psychological need, but i am 100% NOT saying that all humans have that need. In fact i personally don't feel like i need it. The person who started this thread (her comment was deleted) defines sex as a "need to have," therefore I consider that a psychological need. For her. Because obviously she'll still be alive without sex. But maybe she won't be thriving without sex, because that's the conditions she has set.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 02:57 AM
-4

I didn't say there was? I'm defining a difference between biological needs to keep an organism alive and mental needs that do not.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 01:58 AM
-5

Again, you're conflating the two ideas. You will die if you don't meet your biological needs. You will not die without meeting your psychological/mental needs. Just because an individual has a certain mental need doesn't mean it's necessarily healthy. I "need" a cigarette, doesn't mean i should have it. Asexual people do not experience sexual attraction, it has nothing to do with the (healthy or otherwise) need for sex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 01:32 AM
38

My friend did the quiz with her husband, turns out his preferred way to give and receive was Words of Affirmation. Every day he would say "that was a delicious meal" or "you're so great at XXX" and she never really noticed it was significant. So she went out of her way to add compliments to their daily routine and he feels more appreciated now. That's how the book was intended to work to get couples to understand each other better, but the Languages have spiraled out of control a bit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 01:24 AM
1

Wait what i don't want flowers and chocolates, i want steak and head
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 01:17 AM
2

...third and most likely final time Girl needs some serious help if this isn't "definitely final time" material.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 01:14 AM
0

This is 100% not a common/typical thing in the kink community. Doing something so dangerous "off-script" is insane, from what i understand that would get him blacklisted from his local scene.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 01:09 AM
6

The mod team is pretty hands-off, but the users have been (lately) very reasonable. In this particular post the comments are overwhelmingly in the "Leave Him Yesterday" camp. I hope that OP reads it and follows through.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 12:58 AM
2

Her tradcon wife bullshit aside, i'm preeeeeetty sure men like the appearance of breasts. In general. Never met a man who'd complain if their SOs showed them her boobs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 12:47 AM
5

The post reached their comment/karma limit and was deleted as a rule. It has nothing to do with standards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 12:42 AM
21

This is an unfair comparison, fish can provide and take care of themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 12:39 AM
45

These fish have adapted to survive in extreme ocean conditions, why would anyone compare a human male to something so cool?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 12:38 AM
-11

The entire English language is a joke honestly. The OP of the blog is conflating biological need with psychological need and it's fucking misleading.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 12:33 AM
75

That's offensive to Satanists.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 08:42 PM
6

A "walk date" is always the prime example because it is a zero-effort date. It's not so much the activity itself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 08:38 PM
6

You jest but some of us were never taught to expect good intentions and respect as the minimum. Not even just in terms of dating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 04:10 PM
12

i just choked on my tea lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 04:02 PM
4

Younger me is in this photo
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 03:57 PM
7

This feels hella staged, but it's still cute.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 03:09 PM
4

It wouldn't make a difference anyway. (Assuming this is even genuine and not staged for social.) They lose all sense of taste and smell. Interestingly though not everybody gets that symptom from what i've heard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 03:05 PM
36

This is so important to clarify. tbh i really dislike this phrase because it can be so misleading to young girls and easily twisted around by male lurkers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 02:18 AM
-13

I don't even like to use the word "feminist" to describe myself because i don't need that whole "No, not THAT feminism" conversation that follows.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 01:07 PM
12

It's kinda depressing but i can't think of any memories of women classmates/co-workers stepping up to take a leadership role, nor being encouraged to do so by teachers/bosses.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 02:01 AM
8

Do you recall what the name of the documentary was and/or what platform it was on?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 01:50 AM
43

It's important to point out positive traits because some women have no idea what it looks like. Highlighting HV traits isn't "applauding the bare minimum," it's saying "this is an example of healthy behavior." (Conversely exposing fuckboi-ery isn't glorifying misandry, it's saying "this is a example of shitty behavior.") I'm going to get downvoted for this but I think we could use more examples of positive, healthy day-to-day behaviors. A lot of us literally have never seen "the bare minimum" in…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 09:31 PM
13

lmao cannot unsee it now
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 09:42 PM
1

That's probably the best time for you swoop in and introduce them to FDS, before they can repeat the same lesson. ] "Look at this cool dating guide I found, check it out, it'll change the way you date hinthintwinkwink" lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 01:00 AM
17

You're right. It hurts to watch your friends go through it, but you have to let them live and learn. You'd be doing them a disservice if you keep them away from that lived experience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 03:17 PM
5

I struggle with the last one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 11:59 PM
14

Same here. I would be hesitant to describe anyone as HV until at least a year or so of knowing them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 06:11 PM
18

A friend of mine goes out of his way to combat casual sexism. If a male interrupts a female in his classroom, he'll stop him and say "She wasn't done speaking."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 06:06 PM
216

The fact that hetero women even exist is proof enough that sexual orientation is not a choice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 05:57 PM
16

"Maybe he just doesn't think it's so important" But those are important things!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 05:53 PM
64

This is so adorable!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 03:34 AM
148

He's not a HVM until he proves himself. Good lesson not to get your hopes up early.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 02:13 AM
28

I'm sure there's some truth to it but n = 21 is hardly reliable. It'd be interesting to see modern day results to this study, though i'm not sure what today's "bikini photos" equivalent is. Ten years ago it was way harder to get access to pornographic material, now it's everywhere.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 10:33 PM
18

I knew a couple who got engagement "ring" tattoos. The husband wimped out from pain halfway through his session. So he has a half-circle tattoo his ring finger.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 07:41 PM
90

GORE WARNING for those of you who don't enjoy that kind of horror movie.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 07:37 PM
17

But how can you tell the difference before it gets the the point when he attacks your weak points?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 04:03 PM
32

It's more critical that you both have matching preferences when it comes to daily communication.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 10:03 PM
7

In the before-times at concerts/bars i would gently guide males out of the way by intentionally touching their lower backs. They were always shocked that it was a harmless 5ft lady doing it lol. Very effective at getting around crowds though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 09:28 PM
41

I am so confused about who the actual target demographic of this is. Gay men who exercise?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 04:21 AM
19

Your phrasing is more accurate. My teachers and bosses have power over me, but it's because I voluntarily entered a contract with their particular institutions. I don't want anything from them specifically. They were assigned to me by the organizations we're both apart of. Though in a dating (or even friendship maybe) context it tracks. The party that "wants it" more has less power. Not that it's necessarily healthy to view dating as a power struggle....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 12:22 AM
7

LOL yeah wtf happened to the doors
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 05:09 PM
17

Who the heck built a bathroom out of wood and didn't add ventilation?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 04:40 PM
131

The Vikings were actually quite hygenic. iirc Saxon men were in a huff because their women were attracted to Viking men because they bathed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/20 10:50 PM
16

Girls are trained to be self-sacrificing and to take care of others, putting themselves last.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/20 05:44 PM
31

That's a lot of words for "I'm single"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/20 01:16 AM
13

Dang I had to dig specifically to find that, the top Google results are about his biography and writing. Apparently his TY views skyrocketed after he made a series of videos denouncing bill C-16, flat out saying he will not use students preferred pronouns. He's since said that he's "found a way to monetize SJWs".... My impression is that he's a real-life troll saying whatever gets him more Patreon money.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 11:33 PM
16

I can't figure it out either, he got famous for writing a self-help book i guess? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/12_Rules_for_Life The 12 rules seem pretty innocuous/rebranding of Purpose Driven Life/every generic self-help book. Life is suffering, find a higher purpose, etc. Not sure how he came to be a fascist/incel figurehead based on that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 10:29 PM
57

I hate that the "breaking down her walls" trope is seen as a positive effort. The walls are there to keep you out, dude.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 06:45 PM
12

Do not do this unless you're in immediate danger. Have a safety plan in place. You will not be able to make the best decisions during a crisis which is why it's important to have a detailed, practical escape planned. https://www.thehotline.org/create-a-safety-plan/ Abusers don't care about the welfare of an infant. Abusers care about using an infant to control their victim. When you're the victim it's never as simple as "just leave him." Everyone should read Why Does He Do That: https://www.good…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 06:43 PM
8

I worked at a tech company where all the programmers were male (except 1) and 100% of the HR department were female. You'd assume that an all-women hiring team would be more likely to pick out women candidates but nope.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 06:17 PM
14

Was there a turning point that made you change your mind or was it gradual?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/20 11:09 PM
19

If you’re too afraid to communicate your standards and needs, he ain’t the one. Wish someone i told me this when I was 18! I didn't even know having needs was an option.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/20 03:36 PM
5

Happy birthday to her! Warms my heart to see women supporting other women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/20 12:22 AM
25

Women supporting women is the real strategy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/20 01:48 PM
1

Not surprised it originated from 4chan! I don't think there's any formal advocacy groups (that i know of,) just individuals being loud on social media.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/20 12:44 PM
3

I'm not sure if it's more than usual, I've just seen some stuff on Twitter and hear TY commentary videos mentioning the "movement." The first time I heard about it (maybe a year ago?) i thought it was a joke, but it appears i was wrong!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/20 12:38 PM
51

Pedos are actually pushing to be included in the LGBT+ umbrella now, under the term "Minor Attracted Persons."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/20 01:55 AM
45

Nah, all women are pretty
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/20 09:11 PM
22

r/menwritingwomen is one of my favorites
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/20 11:56 PM
5

That's a good way to phrase it. I still make this mistake all the time and assume males have the same level of empathy and restraint that i do. But those skills are not something they're instinctively good at, AND on top of that boys are socialized against it. I have noticed that young men these days are way more open and sensitive vs how i remember boys being back in my day. So society is changing, slowly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/20 11:17 PM
9

This goes both ways. If he's communicating that he doesn't want a serious relationship, don't delude yourself into thinking you're gonna be the special one that locks him down.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/20 04:47 PM
101

A lot of women are taught to spare a male's feelings- don't do this. He's not hung up on you- he'll move on to his next target soon enough.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/20 01:15 AM
3

Wow some of these ads.... 37M requirement is "Must be 26 or under".... YIKES.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/20 11:45 PM
3

The OP has been deleted by the mods but the arranged marriage was between a Western male and Indian female. Is this still common practice? Do Indian families still want to marry their daughters to Westerners? Or is it not as popular these days?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/20 04:45 PM
10

Here's what the text post was before the mods removed it: A little background here: My husband and I had an arranged marriage. We've been married 4 years. He grew up in a western country and I grew up in a conservative country where sex isn't really talked about with anyone. He claims that we have a bad sex life for the following reasons: I don't initiate sex - this is true, at the beginning of our marriage he would initiate it but he started to do it less often now, almost to the point where he…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/20 04:35 PM
101

This is why FDS is so effective and necessary in early dating. Women are conditioned to take responsibility for everyone else's feelings and we need to stop doing so.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/20 08:45 PM
5

Cheaters projecting is not unique to males, though I wouldn't be surprised if they were in the majority of offenders.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/20 06:47 AM
4

r/AreTheStraightsOK
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/20 06:45 AM
9

It's very staged- she's breaking character and he's overacting to be "funny."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/20 07:01 PM
5

He's definitely depressed. But it's still his responsibility to go to his doctor. Depression doesn't excuse bad behavior.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/10/20 03:20 PM
9

Imagine outing yourself like this tho
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/10/20 03:03 PM
48

https://i.redd.it/berel0kv6iu51.jpg I can't find the FDS thread about it, but the original artwork was popularized on twitter.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/20 06:47 PM
12

I once attended a lecture where a professional graphic artist advised that freelancers should "charge top dollar" for their effort. He said even noobs should charge market rate because the client equates paying more $$$ with getting better quality artwork.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/20 09:22 PM
21

Yeah what a bizarrely specific niche group
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/20 09:13 PM
3

Same with my parents and i now i just feel awkward when someone compliments me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/20 05:43 AM
10

lol same here, I thought it was a PSA against prickly salesmen in business suits.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/20 05:35 AM
30

Agreed i can totally see high-school kids doing this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/20 02:06 AM
52

they tend to do a bad job so the woman "punishes" them Oh i read on r/breakingmom often that married men do this to avoid being asked to do chores. I guess male nature doesn't change even when the context is different.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/20 01:53 AM
1

I don't think hardcore BDSM is new, though i've never seen people talk about how common it is until the last couple years. I only see very young people (like 18-20 years old,) post about this on reddit, and it almost seems like it's expected of them to perform BDSM acts even when having sex with a new partner for the 1st time. Vanilla is the new obscure i guess.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/20 01:45 AM
22

I'm not into femdom so sorry in advance if this is a dumb question lol but what's the appeal of it for males? Like does someone really get sexual gratification from doing my dishes?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/20 01:01 AM
9

Same- I get the spirit of this post but I 100% have RBF and it's great.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/20 12:33 AM
38

It has nothing to do with leggings. I still get looks when i wear ratty old t-shirts and stained basketball shorts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 06:51 PM
26

This makes more sense- porn is a terrible representation of actual sex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/20 03:07 PM
17

I was That Girl in the group. Everyone else was pairing off and I wasn't. When i was feeling desperate i'd look at the shitty dates i've been on in the past and the shitty relationships my peers were in and change my mind. r/breakingmom is great inspiration (anti-inspiration?) for this. Eventually i joined a local sports club and made new friends there. I also started doing "couples" things alone- movies, art classes, etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/20 04:25 AM
10

It takes a lot of bravery to be That Guy who calls out other males. Good for him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 10:37 PM
9

they weren’t somebody’s to him the way his friend was. Yes, this would be the definition of what a friend is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 10:34 PM
12

Yeah it is a harsh toke when you fully realize the reality of today's dating world, especially if you've been dreaming of a loving relationship since you were a kid. There's nothing wrong with wanting a marriage and children over a master's degree. Ignore anyone who shames you for wanting to be a "traditional" woman. You want whatever it is you want. The problem is that most males are not family material and it takes (lots) of time to go through all the trash, so to speak. Ultimately your parent…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 08:39 PM
105

Don't date until you feel powerful enough to do the picking.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 04:11 PM
26

I just want to be genuinely loved and committed to by a good man. That’s it, why is it so hard? There's simply not many good men out there. It's hard to find one. ​ Why do I feel like I’d rather have a boyfriend than a master’s degree? This is the real important question. A lot of girls are taught to grow up to be wives and mothers only, not to get a master's degree. Does that apply to you or do you think it's something else in your case?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 04:11 PM
24

Amen and this goes for all people not just the ones we date. A well adjusted person won't sit around fuming over small things or stuff that can't be helped. I had one boss that would do multiple postmortems over minor incidents, in order to pinpoint blame on someone/something. Even though sometimes shitty things just happen due to circumstance, as anyone who has ever worked in team can attest. Then I had another boss who understood there was no benefit to rehashing what can't be changed anyway. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 03:20 AM
161

That is a really sweet gesture but "real HVM shit" should be reserved for idk, demonstrated commitment over time maybe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 03:01 AM
8

Following this thread- I'm interested too!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/20 10:23 PM
6

How did he do it? I can't imagine how one might accidentally kill a plant out of stupidity...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/10/20 09:32 PM
2

You can respond with "I'm used to formal dates" or "I don't enjoy drink dates" and that should clue him in that you're looking for something a little more high effort. Tho if he's the type of guy who also wants to go on dinner dates, then he wouldn't have asked you to drinks.
/r/RedPillWomen12/10/20 02:42 PM
19

Ooh I didn't know about her childhood or about the rumors, but I can believe it. If a child was never given the education her peers did, then of course she'd fall behind academically.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 08:56 PM
51

This dumb "ride or die" narrative is pushed onto black women the most, not even Bey is immune :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 07:56 PM
18

Can't even finish a sentence properly What?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 07:54 PM
17

r/AreTheStraightsOK
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 10:06 PM
7

Lol some people are tidier by nature and some are messier. It's okay!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 06:12 AM
5

He looks like he doesn't even lift tho 🧐
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 06:10 AM
1

Sometimes they get it right
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 06:06 AM
13

Downvote me to hell but i take issue with this. It's implying women who pay less than $1200/monthly in bills WOULD be interested in those men? That's divisive and unnecessary, all women should be on the same side.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 06:02 AM
4

That's not even how the amulet works in the game...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 05:55 AM
3

This is cute lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 07:54 PM
49

My friend writes contract templates and pushed to have gender-neutral language be the default, but her company refused to switch from "he/him/his" as the default. The corporate world has a long way to go.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/20 07:09 PM
5

I don't think TRP and RPW share the same core philosophy at all. Just the name.
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/20 12:13 AM
4

If 1% of your audience misunderstands your content, they probably read it wrong. If most of your audience misunderstands your content, your content may be poorly worded.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/20 10:44 PM
21

Same here, I find them educational. There's been some subtle negs, shitty "compliments," low-effort "date" suggestions that i personally wouldn't have picked up on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 08:55 PM
-4

I heard a snippet and the host was describing how she achieved orgasm with some type of stimulation. Incredibly NSFW but i wouldn't call it low value content just for being sexually explicit... what am i missing here?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 07:46 PM
5

I always think it's more that shitty angry narcissists are attracted to steroids (and bodybuilding in general,) and less that steroids turn perfectly ordinary males into shitty angry narcissists. They have to have that spark in them already. It's almost like they WANT an excuse to go maximum douche mode.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 05:19 AM
1

Haha blame England, they came up with it and Americans inherited it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 12:15 AM
1

Those are all objectively nourishing habits for your body. What kind of goal or objective are you trying to reach for/not able to reach?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 01:43 AM
81

This was pretty typical dating advice for young men over the last couple decades, i think it's ingrained now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/20 02:30 AM
3

Wow that is... something.... and on her birthday, sheesh.... I feel bad for her honestly. Hope her life gets better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 12:03 AM
8

This post has been removed unfortunately
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 07:11 PM
32

Omg the way she cracks up 🤣🤣🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 06:13 PM
10

Lol'd @ "ENT abuse." I do wonder what a clinician has to say about it. There was a doctor who made a post about long-term side effects of rough anal sex, this reminded me that the doc. ultimately recommended against it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 06:06 PM
14

Can we get a tl;dr on who she is/who she dated?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 05:43 PM
7

Yeesh I was gonna comment if both partners are over ~25 it's not that weird, they're possibly at similar stages in life (graduated, mid-career, looking to settle down, etc) but i didn't see that she was 18 when they started dating. 18 to 27 is a world of difference, people change a LOT in their teens and early 20s.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 07:35 PM
9

The trend seems to bounce back and forth between curvier and thinner. "Small thicc" was trendy not too long ago and now it seems to be swinging back towards "the skinni." Just wait 5-10 more years and curvy will be back in again. We just can't win.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 07:03 PM
8

I saw a social media campaign against Fair and Lovely a couple years ago, sad to hear it's still on the market. :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 06:57 PM
29

She even left her job at a really amazing company to be with him in the States. She 100% used him to gain citizenship. USA citizenship (and to a lesser extent, a diploma from a US school) is still considered a "holy grail" achievement in China. (Idk how prevalent this still is but it def. used to be "trendy" to want mixed babies so that might have been a motivation for her as well.) My family knew a lot of women who did something similar, and I know at least in the case of one woman she felt "re…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 06:55 PM
13

I feel this hard, I'm paranoid that a man will flip years or even decades down the line. And this fear is justified based on the numerous posts describing husbands cheating, turning abusive, leaving when the woman gets sick, etc. I feel like i can't ever allow myself to get too attached or fully in love, I have to be ready to let go at any minute.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 03:07 PM
11

That's exactly why I love FDS- women lifting up women is so rare.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 03:03 PM
35

Yeah "girlfriending test" sounds fake to me. As if he had options to test out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 02:58 PM
55

Jesus the two older kids are more than old enough to clean up after themselves. He failed as a dad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 02:53 PM
230

lmfao wait until he moves to China and learns they have crazy high standards compared to the USA. There's more men than women and the competition is hot! Plus there's a growing trend of young women prioritizing career over dating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 02:50 PM
1

? Is he a youtuber?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 03:49 AM
6

This exactly. FDS is marriage/family oriented because it's what a lot of women want. But you don't have to want that, even if the majority of women do. You're allowed to want whatever you want. If you know yourself and know what you're looking for, and take steps to Get It... that's high-value.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 03:40 AM
5

I relate to that feeling, they destroy your ability to trust and be vulnerable. I feel 100% safer around women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 02:46 AM
7

Is that just a heart rate monitor or does it measure other metrics too?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 02:39 AM
7

Yo those chairs are comfortable as fuck, i kinda want one for myself lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 02:36 AM
8

Men love to be useful! Esp when it comes to physical work. Any tips for accepting graciously? Is a smile and "thank you" good enough?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 08:04 PM
105

oh my god this works so well... "my child left his dirty underwear on the floor..." "my child left dirty dishes on the counter..."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 04:25 PM
37

YES to women lifting up women
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 04:22 PM
16

Oh no :( I hope she's doing good now, wherever she is!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 04:22 PM
68

It seems to me that black women have the most pressure to not be "picky" when it comes to broke/jobless partners, has this been the case in your experience?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 03:31 PM
33

Right? Males need to their share of the emotional labor and focus on themselves. Honestly the core FDS principle of "self-wellness comes first, dating comes second" applies to both men and women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 03:29 PM
3

Ah so it's almost like an obsession with keeping things "balanced." Thank you for clearing this up, I did actually have that conflated with "matching energy." My ex did that "I love you so say it back" thing, and variations of it. I thought it was cute at the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 02:17 AM
5

What does "keeping score" mean and some examples in a relationship context?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 12:32 AM
38

Bless you and all tall women- i have trouble reaching top shelves at the store and prefer when a woman helps me instead of a male.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 12:16 AM
36

How is the ability to laugh at your old mistakes trashy? It shows you've learned better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 12:06 AM
28

Imagine not showing up to a job interview and saying "I can't believe I got rejected for something like that"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 08:36 PM
17

Dollars to doughnuts those guys don't even lift
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 08:32 PM
19

There's some research to show creatine improves cognitive function and depression but it primarily affects athletic performance. It also seemed to increase recovery speed for me, but i'm not sure if that was placebo or what. Not discounting merry's experience but those raging assholes were already predisposed to be raging assholes. iirc heavy lifting does increase testosterone production in male bodies though, and that def. will increase aggression. I'm willing to bet $ creatine wasn't the only …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 08:30 PM
23

My experience is the same. The most loud and proud "feminist" males treat women like... some otherworldy creature on a pedestal instead of like, i dunno, fellow humans.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 08:06 PM
12

It's fucking sad that such behavior IS normalized, when it should be repulsive.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 02:41 PM
5

Agreed, it's not about money, it's about mindset.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 02:24 PM
3

I agree, victims of abuse deserve our empathy and kindness most of all. I don't think OP is purposefully saying victims don't deserve empathy, or even that they are at fault. Or at least I hope that's not how she feels. But she is pointing out the (rather unfortunate) fact that most people will predictably respond in that way. Society at large is lacking empathy and compassion. It is disheartening and I don't have any solutions, other than choosing to practice radical empathy on a personal scale…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 02:21 PM
6

Reminder not to make it off limits to yourself though. 8) You don't even need a dude for pleasure.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 02:05 PM
14

Yes males need to do the work! Stop telling your sons "toughen up sport" and maybe like give him emotional support???
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 02:02 PM
27

I agree with the spirit of this but let's not forget in many cases women have their agency taken away by violent, controlling males.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 01:57 PM
2

Probably both, males who are addicted to porn likely also don't have respect for women lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 01:25 PM
3

a relationship is not supposed to make you feel like that Yes exactly. Supporting the commercial porn industry is a separate problem on its own. The more immediate issue is that if he doesn't respect boundaries, he's not worth dating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 01:24 PM
1

How can you tell?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 01:06 PM
4

Oh noooo well at least he stopped dancing around it. Now she's got a whole lot of free time to go to therapy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 01:06 PM
8

This is so wholesome T-T
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 06:58 AM
44

Saving this post to remind me it's not about money, it's about generosity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 06:57 AM
4

Bless this man. "Understand the job required, then get it done well" in this kind of context is pretty peak masculinity to me. It requires attentiveness, thoughtfulness, initiative, and in this case elbow grease. These are traits so many males lack.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 06:52 AM
9

TIL i emotionally abuse myself
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 05:24 AM
5

Lol i think they're just roasting him for wearing low-effort while she dressed up.i don't think the outfit is that bad honestly <\<)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 05:22 AM
11

Legit read the title wrong and thought this thread was going to be about vaginal health lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 05:16 AM
8

"People won't have empathy" means just that. It does not mean women in abusive relationships deserve it. It does not mean it is their fault. It does not mean they aren't the victims. It is NOT fair or right, but it is realistically how most people will react. Esp. if they have no first-hand experience with abuse. So yes, be accountable and own up to your shit, but understand there is a massive difference between pining after a string of emotionally stunted fuckbois VS. getting trapped in an abus…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 05:07 AM
15

That's what's so great about this sub- it's not really even about males.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 04:31 AM
4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=opkgWvAcPM0
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 03:34 AM
6

Me three!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 03:31 AM
9

Did he grow up in an all-male household or something? Wow.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 03:28 AM
6

She did! Apparently he was being passive-aggressive on purpose to make her break up with him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 03:27 AM
22

That's what i suspected at first, but then i thought nobody could pick THAT dumb of a thing to do... and i was so wrong!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 03:26 AM
18

Did we all date the same guy? lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 03:23 AM
8

I don't want to view them as the enemy either but men routinely beat, rape, or murder us because.... they can? I WANT to cultivate male friendships just as readily as with women... but it's just not realistic/safe to treat them the same way. IME almost all males are selfish and think with their dicks. They'll even fake entire friendships for a chance to fuck you. I always have a guard up around them. It's reasonable to want an emotional+sexual connection with a boyfriend. That shouldn't be a big…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 03:23 AM
4

If they'd stop being hostile towards women maybe we wouldn't have to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 03:09 AM
2

As it should be! If it's reached the point in your relationship when you've deemed him worthy of seeing your naked butt, you can already be sure he's not going to care about stretch marks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 03:06 AM
7

Apparently it was proposed to be included in the DSM-5 as a subsection of hypersexual disorder, but ultimately voted out. It would have been treated as a compulsive disorder rather than an addiction but there wasn't enough research backing up either. Maybe in the next edition...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 01:09 AM
17

LOL I just noticed it's the same redditor who posted about loving anal sex/shaming women who don't. I think she's just really young and gets a thrill from the approval of internet strangers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 12:57 AM
4

That's a good point, they must get some weird enjoyment out of it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 12:53 AM
23

You are correct but i do wish all women could band together and collectively raise our standards. It's frustrating to think that young women are seeing posts like this on popular subreddits (screenshot is from r/sex) and thinking they "should" have that same viewpoint.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 11:27 PM
13

The OP is a woman, which saddens me more than if a male had posted this. :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 11:23 PM
3

Ohh so that's what males call "dating" now!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 04:48 PM
2

Love getting a view of what a healthy relationship looks like. I get to didn't see any examples growing up, this is so helpful!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 04:46 PM
3

lmao at 500 cookies. The pandemic baking spree is REAL.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 04:45 PM
7

Disappointment hurts, even if it's a small one. Treat yourself to something pampering. I buy myself expensive sheet masks if i ever want a Moment lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 04:39 PM
2

I didn't know PUA was still an active community! I saw a lot of posts and videos pop up maybe like 10 years ago? Right after the book "The Game" came out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 04:26 PM
11

Yeesh this is what every woman at r/breakingmom goes through. I feel so bad for them!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 04:09 PM
4

Are walk dates gaining popularity due to COVID?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 04:07 PM
3

Is "fit" simply slang for sexy/hot/etc or is it more specific than that? (I assume UK?)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 04:03 PM
7

I played the girlfriend for over a year before he told me he was "just trying to be himself." (like wtf does that even mean?) Ugh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 03:58 PM
27

Damn wish I knew this when I was 18 lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 10:26 PM
6

Lesson learned!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 09:33 PM
12

The best part about FDS is that it's not even about men lol Always put yourself first. Women are socialized to put themselves last when the reality is you can't pour from an empty cup.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 05:20 PM
14

LOL the animator got her face exactly right! So cute.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 05:09 PM
3

Yes please!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 05:08 PM
15

Sis deadass made a new account named iamsomuchbetterthanu just to "call out judgmental women" lmao. Someone is a r/SelfAwarewolves
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 08:57 PM
3

Honestly we need to normalize men providing platonic emotional intimacy for other men. They are so repressed they can't tell the different between physical affection and sexuality. Let them cry on each other's shoulders and lift each other up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 08:43 PM
6

Ugh how do i learn how to do this? 100% of the time i think i'm overreacting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 08:27 PM
64

"wOmEn aRe EMOtIoNaL"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 08:25 PM
13

Oof I loved the "broken bird" boys when I was younger. Yeeesh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 08:24 PM
2

He deserves to be alone
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 08:21 PM
1

The sheer entitlement... christ...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 08:19 PM
1

I'm afraid that's the majority of men :( I really hope it isn't but my gut tells me i'm wrong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 08:19 PM
17

They really do see women as objects to use.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 11:20 PM
7

Are you in the US? I didn't know this was a demographic at all!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 11:19 PM
11

Yeesh, if he's gonna act like a proud manchild, at least have a youthful glowing physique to match...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 10:40 PM
13

lol the only thing a MGTOW doesn't do is go his own way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 09:37 PM
15

I didn't know about WAATGM, is this literally a sub making fun of women who have standards? lmfao
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 09:36 PM
28

They're probably also the type that like to use "Good girl" in a sexual way lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 09:21 PM
4

I've only seen younger (like under 40) people do this online. Most of them are TRP/PUA sorts and use "female" in a dehumanizing sense. Some are young women who likely don't realize it's self-objectifying. Nothing is more grating than a comment that starts with "Well, as a female..."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 09:20 PM
22

I intentionally say "males" when I want to be condescending.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 09:16 PM
31

It's the fact that he's so clear and adamant about it that freaks me out. I know men are possessive but it just makes me wonder how many men secretly think "that's MY pussy" but are just less overt about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 08:16 PM
17

lmao can't say i've met any, i'm assuming they're all young fuckbois.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 08:14 PM
1

Aw man I wish this product was still available!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 03:33 PM
86

lmao WHY do they do this?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 03:12 PM
36

Generally adult males have 0 support system outside of romantic partner. It's really messed up, but it is how they're socialized. That's why they seem so needy in comparison to women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 11:26 PM
2

God that's so depressing, I didn't know the trend was rising in recent years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 06:15 PM
9

It's hilarious that they have requirements at all meanwhile they've never even touched moisturizer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 03:22 PM
1

Yiiiiikes do you have a source? I'm terrified of being trapped like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 03:04 PM
72

Adults date women, not girls. Avoid girls period.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 02:55 PM
20

Women supporting women is the best part of FDS
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 02:27 AM
23

How long did he keep up the act before turning on you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 02:25 AM
13

r/SelfAwarewolves He is so, SO close to understanding that being single IS the option
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 02:19 AM
8

That room is r/NeckbeardNests worthy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 02:15 AM
8

It's not even a good analogy, cancerous cells don't attract each other.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 07:41 PM
73

So r/RedPillWomen actually also emphasize a lot of the same things dating strategies that the males hate on. Things like HEAVY vetting and not dating losers, being LTR/marriage-minded instead of being in situationships, no sex until commitment and investment, focusing on self-improvement first, etc. The core difference is RPW believes women should be fundamentally submissive in a relationship. While FDS believes a relationship should be a fair partnership, IF a woman even chooses to bother with …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 07:38 PM
50

The mods are so good at that here, I'm really impressed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 07:21 PM
11

A competition you'll never win. You'll always be the 2nd woman in his life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 07:17 PM
33

I've noticed this trend in person too, particularly with young black women. They feel like they have to be the "ride or die" even if their BFs treat them badly. :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 07:11 PM
15

And then you have to comfort HIM because you're the mean bitch who called him out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 06:56 PM
18

What a big floof <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 06:50 PM
1

Yes even a box spring! Shocking right?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 03:26 PM
14

I've only met a handful of guys who have been, in every case it was for a bachelor party, and every one of them said it wasn't fun, the drinks were expensive, they felt awkward, and nobody really wanted to be there. But guys collectively still keep going?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 03:18 PM
1

LOL this is cute, and to male lurkers: 3-in-1 shampoo is too harsh and can irritate your scalp, don't wait to impress a lady to switch to a grown up cleansing routine.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 03:09 PM
2

LOL i hope he kept up the habit!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 02:58 PM
2

My current bf had hand soap and a trash can w/ lid in his bathroom and i was SO impressed just because i've never seen a bachelor pad like that before. The bar is really below the ground.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 02:56 PM
3

Wish i could remember 😭
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 05:37 AM
43

Forgot where i saw this but a redditor posted about how in his local community it was considered unmanly if you couldn't pleasure your woman orally. If only that was the norm...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 02:37 AM
3

Thanks for validating, it's what i needed to hear. I know intellectually it's not about me/attraction... but it's just so different from my past experiences that i'm a bit stunned. The book looks insightful so it's on my Goodreads list now. Any tips on asking "do you wanna keep going?" but phrasing it in a less... blunt way? I wanna be seductive about it lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 02:31 AM
13

Women supporting other women is my favorite part of FDS. It sets this subreddit apart from other relationship and dating subs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 02:17 AM
3

What is "a finesse" in TRP language?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 11:51 PM
13

I just watched that clip... she is way too nice!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 11:32 PM
15

She's so pretty and nice and her friend is right!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 11:25 PM
28

My Swedish friend says they are all named after small towns in Sweden. Looks like this one is named after an island in the southeast. edit; the pronunciation sounds like "nuut-holl-men" to me lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 11:13 PM
9

I've only seen the TV version but she's a very un-subtle contrast to Starlight. I wonder if they made her female just to have that on-screen visual? Star is the embodiment of "good" feminine purity and Stormfront is a literal "feminist" nazi.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 11:09 PM
10

Another redditor pointed out that is could be due to medication! One of the side effects is delayed ejaculation so it makes so much sense now!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 10:26 PM
9

Yeah he is! This is probably the cause, but he says he enjoys sex and still initiates regularly. I'm just in my head about it because i'm used to sex being 100% focused on the man's orgasm.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 10:25 PM
16

He stopped using porn and alcohol before we even met so that's part of why I'm so confused about it. Maybe i'm just not having MY pleasure be the man's primary focus, i've never been with anyone else before who does whatever/whenever i want sexually.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 05:49 PM
33

My man doesn't always orgasm himself and it makes me feel self conscious? Like he's just fucking me out of obligation? Idk if it's something actually bad or if it's just so different from the norm that i'm in shock.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 05:25 PM
7

This is a guess but they probably want the woman to change their pic to gain the man's approval. So it puts her in the position of seeking his validation/praise. It's a stepping stone to get her to exhibit more chasing behavior. It also makes the man feel a sense of control.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 05:16 PM
12

Personally they are not for me. I hate crowds and being in the spotlight so a wedding sounds like a real nightmare. Nevermind dealing with family. Ugh. Plus the wedding industry artificially inflates prices "just because" and this makes me not want to participate lol. I think society puts a lot of pressure on couples to have the "perfect wedding" and i don't like the idea of doing it just to conform to expectations or to "keep up." I see women on reddit get stressed out about having everything p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 04:57 PM
12

I've never seen this in PUA subs before, is this a relatively new thing they're doing?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 04:38 PM
232

Men are actually the source of my problems tho it's not called a patriarchy for nothin
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 04:33 PM
3

Oh lord. How was the dissertation?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 04:24 PM
360

Males: wants a sexy beautiful waifu Males: drinks only soda doesn't wear sunscreen
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 01:12 AM
28

They start listening when she says "I'm done." For them the negotiations start when the woman has already given up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 11:36 PM
68

Half of communication is LISTENING, which males don't do. They don't even notice something is wrong until the woman already has her bags packed up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 10:45 PM
5

I got tired of hitting Decline so I just blocked all DMs and chats. Highly recommended.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 10:32 PM
6

My BF loves me but i still don't trust him for a minute. I just don't believe any male wouldn't turn on a dime.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 09:27 PM
9

Why do they even bother?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 03:03 AM
7

I remember thinking it was a novel idea the first time I ever heard of it, though I never used it myself. It doesn't seem to have gained a whole lot of traction here, with the people i know anyway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 02:48 AM
16

Bumble is the one that makes women send the first message right? Is that why it's not FDS approved?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 12:15 AM
90

That artificial smugness covering up insecurity tho
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 12:13 AM
53

Same here, I see no point in marriage at all. I think "no cohabitation until engagement" works fine in most cases, but the fact is in my city the only way to avoid having roommates is to live with an SO. And I'd feel way more "at home" living with a partner.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 12:09 AM
6

There's nothing masculine about them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 12:02 AM
86

lol Russian girls wouldn't accept a terrible approach like that
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 10:33 PM
15

Primal masculine instinct is the urge to hunt and fight, to keep your tribe safe and well-fed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 06:39 PM
16

Same here, this is some r/MakeMeSuffer cringe shit
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 06:29 PM
11

This is so cute
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 06:24 PM
10

I just straight up don't drink anymore. On top of making it unsafe to be around men, it makes me pee every 5 minutes and adds extra calories, and also hangovers at my age last for DAYS. No thanks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 06:23 PM
28

I hate the term "alpha" so much
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 06:10 PM
5

The parents approached her individually though, and while i my hope is that she went to her BF who then took steps to correct the problem.... that's probably not what happened.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 06:05 PM
14

Another redditor pointed out that in the parents view, the BF is their son so he gets a "pass" but the GF is a stranger who owes them. I can empathize with wanting to coddle your son, but it also seems callous to only ask the GF to clean.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 01:17 AM
7

Yeah i can see where the parents are coming from too which makes conflicted about this. On one hand what you pointed out is true, she's not their daughter and they are doing her a huge favor. On the other hand chores should be split fairly so it's not fair if she does all of it. Though honestly if I were her and knew what kind of in-laws I'd be inevitably be dealing with, I'd question if that's the path I really want.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 01:10 AM
5

I assume he didn't disagree with her/stand up for you in anyway, am i right?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 01:05 AM
10

I'd be pretty pissed too. Esp because they approached her only and not their son. Idk if I'd confront them directly or go to the BF first.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 12:25 AM
32

Yeah this one is tricky because it housekeeping would be the polite thing (for both of them) to do, in exchange for rent. Both of them should split chores, but the parents approached her independently and put her in an awkward position. Idk what I'd do in her place.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 12:04 AM
6

In their view, a low-effort attempt to connect IS acceptable because there's so many other options, so why bother putting high-effort into just one person? And we reinforce that mindset when we accept those low-effort "dates." They have no incentive to vet women's profiles if all it takes to get a "yes" is to suggest netflix&chill.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 06:55 PM
37

My strategy for jobs is to research all the criticism written about the company and ask the interviewer if they've already applied XYZ fixes to address those flaws yet. And if not, why not/when will they start? Like negging, but corporate. It's surprisingly effective.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 03:23 PM
14

A lot of males only sign up for OLD for easy sex. I don't get why they even assume a pretense of "dating" though, when there are apps specially for hookups. Even for those who actually intend on dating, coffee+park walk dates seem like the standard these days. I remember when "dinner and a movie" used to be the typical date activity but that doesn't seem popular now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 02:45 PM
59

Interpersonal communication, including dating, 100% should be taught in high school. Along with other basic life skills such as accounting 101, nutrition, home economics, etc. But instead high school only prepares students to join the 9-5 grind, not how to actually be an independent adult. :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 02:07 PM
16

Deadass my bio mom actually convinced kid-me that being throw around and whipped was actually healthy and necessary because kids need to cry it out. Ugh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 01:42 PM
1

I honestly don't mind being a listening ear to people I care about. I have a lot of friends who will go into minute tiny detail about their hobbies/emotions/behaviors, taking an hour to tell a story when a simple "I ate a delicious chocolate cake today." would suffice. It doesn't take any mental energy on my part to nod along while I'm knitting/reading/playing BotW/whatever. And they're always excited for the opportunity to unload without feeling like they're talking too much. But the moment the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 09:42 PM
43

The only people shaming men for having small dicks are.... other men. Every woman has a different preference, and heck some women even prefer oral/manual/whatever stimulation over penetration. They need to quit telling other males they are inadequate if they can't dick a woman into orgasm. Destroy the idea that being good at sex = repeatedly putting your huge PP inside her as fast as possible.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 07:38 PM
50

I saw that one too. I hope she dumped him. She has a need he's not able/not willing to fulfill, so why stay with him?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 07:22 PM
13

Wait that's a thing? I'm afraid to google lmao
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 07:19 PM
3

I'm so afraid of this happening months (or even years) into a relationship. I've seen relationship_advice posts where the man doesn't reveal his abusive nature until after marriage, and now i'm constantly on the lookup for early signs. Disproportionate responses to minor things is a good point. Though I guess in the moment that's easy to write off as "he had a stressful work day" or "he's just hangry" or even "he's just mad at the video game."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 07:02 PM
6

I routinely stayed up all night talking with friends, is this not a thing anymore? (Yes, we're all still friends!)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 06:43 AM
2

This really seems to depends on the individual/location. I can see if some women want to avoid that first-meeting awkwardness while being "trapped" at dinner. If they live/work in a place where it's convenient to do a quick "hello," this could make her feel more at ease for the actual date. (And she can make sure he doesn't smell and is actually 5'10" or whatever lol. Things you can't tell over Zoom.) On the other hand some women want the first meeting to be the actual "date" date. I personally …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 04:15 AM
4

This sounds like a typical platonic work friendship, at this point anyway. Or he may be grooming you. In any case, do not date a coworker 11 years older than you. Just don't do it. Since you want to start going on dates, look for someone your own age. Join a school club, study group, workout club, etc to meet new people. OLD is also fine to practice dating/vetting skills. You can never focus too hard on school though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 04:04 AM
11

The current BF initially messaged me noting a specific request from my profile and offering to fulfill it. Really stood out from the crowd.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 03:25 AM
2

It's not his job to "fix" your lack of ability to trust. You have to do the work. Your insecurities say more about you than him. Go to therapy. I would stop giving validation too if my partner repeatedly called me a liar because I wasn't validating them good enough. That would be a dealbreaker for me. Now, if he actually does disrespect you, dump him. But still go to therapy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 10:26 PM
3

Those shoes look great now. I'm..... going to assume she did it for the content. Please don't let me be wrong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 09:49 PM
15

My friend group casually treat each other to meals/gifts all the time and it never feels transactional. We're just enjoying each other's company. I never thought this could apply to dating but you make a great point.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 09:44 PM
4

Fuck that's scary. What sorts of red flags for this kind of behavior were there early on? What should we watch out for?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 09:30 PM
6

Nobody worth hurtin for
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 09:26 PM
8

Woah what? Source?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 09:24 PM
4

Gentlemen Prefer Blondes
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 09:17 PM
38

Having money doesn't mean he's generous with it. Remember the relationship_advice thread where the trust fund baby allowed his GF to sell her dead mother's heirloom violin to pay medical bills? I already have my own money; his bank account won't impress me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 07:12 PM
8

My friend uses this all the time, I used to think his wife was constantly sick lmao It's a very effective "out"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 02:39 PM
53

They're not even good at fucking!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 01:36 AM
102

The bar is on the fucking floor
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 01:35 AM
1

This comment should be higher. Money doesn't make him a good person.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 01:33 AM
75

Can these mgtow losers actually go their own way for once?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 10:30 PM
3

oooof lesson learned
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 09:00 PM
17

I'm terrified of this happening to me. Another redditor linked to a article that said husbands are 7 times more likely to leave when their wives get sick and now i feel like i can't ever trust a man. Not even in marriage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 07:06 PM
10

You don't need to have a man to have a family. It's more reliable to put your effort in grinding up your salary to a place where you can provide for a child.... vs looking for a good man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 06:49 PM
2

"Women are such mysterious creatures"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 06:35 PM
7

I keep a list too, just to keep myself grounded.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 12:32 AM
30

I don't care about an expensive ring either (can't even wear jewelry at all) but a toy ring?? Seriously???? It's not the low price that bugs me, it's the low-effort. Honestly i don't understand the whole engagement ring tradition but i'll support another woman if that's her requirement. I mean unless she wants a blood diamond then shame shame lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 12:24 AM
13

Ikr "i don't want to date you" should be the end of the exchange but it's never good enough.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 07:07 PM
28

This is a nice sentiment but sometimes when say "no" we get literally murdered so be careful
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 06:08 PM
4

The body comparisons feeling is so real tho, i had to unfollow some ig fitness/yoga accounts because i was looking at their booties.... and then looking at mine. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 06:04 PM
16

i noticed the realist males have bed frames and go to therapy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 06:01 PM
4

I don't agree with this. There's a line between expecting certain behavior vs not accurately expressing your needs. You should expect basic human respect/kindness but you need to state your preferences beyond that. If he isn't paying attention that's his problem. We're socialized to be soft and proceed our speech with "well it's okay with you, maybe XXX would be nice?" but the males are too stupid to read context clues. They need a firm "i prefer XXX, i don't like ABC." And they should remember …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 05:49 PM
98

Are those rings actually rubber bands?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 05:18 PM
6

Ohh good point, i just remembered back when i was at an abuse job feeling like something was low-key "off" but all the time. But i couldn't quite put my finger on it at that time. Guess that was what this famous "intuition" thing feels like!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 10:43 PM
61

I don't drink/go to bars anymore so i never knew this was a trend. That's sad!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 07:42 PM
6

Then you book it before they can say anything. This is brilliant!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 06:34 PM
21

It's too early to judge. Some people (men and women both) really are just slow at texting. Maybe he prefers using a browser based app, or phone calls, video chat, or whatever. Maybe he gets overwhelmed by notifications and puts his phone on DND mode. Maybe he just gets busy with life and forgets to check his phone. If you need more frequent communication at this point let him know and possibly be open to switch to a different medium than SMS. If it's not an absolute priority, just keep dating no…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 06:15 PM
3

I go out with my friends for my hobbies/socializing and to my BF's for food and sex, is this bad? I'm starting to feel bad about it lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 05:40 PM
7

Go Gen Z!!! I don't envy growing up now but these kids are going to become more self-aware, empathetic, and capable than my generation and the ones before me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 05:32 PM
16

How do you know when your intuition is telling you something? I have an hyper-vigilant brain (thanks mom and dad) so EVERYTHING makes me go into an adrenal response. So i can't tell if things are actually bad or if it's just me being mentally ill.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 04:55 PM
28

Me too, I've seen too many posts on r/relationship_adivce where the "great guy" doesn't start being abusive until after marriage or having kids. Even if they were dating for years prior. Or he leaves when the OP gets sick. I'm so afraid of that happening to me. Honestly I feel like i can't ever truly 100% rely on a male partner.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 04:46 PM
9

ngl even though he's a real asshole Loki is my favorite Disney prince
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 04:16 PM
31

I see a lot of 18-19 yr olds get married right around the time they enlist, is this encouraged by the military or just coincidence?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 04:14 PM
40

You were just too stunned by the audacity lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 08:59 PM
25

....that's a thing? that's so sad. imagine being that desperate for affirmation from rando reddit males.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 08:51 PM
17

Growing up I noticed Hispanic boys were always the most aggressively flirty, is this just a cultural thing?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 08:45 PM
11

This! It's not just the people they date. Nobody wants a toxic, draining friend in their group.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 06:49 PM
9

ROFL i got a DM from salty male claiming women are "just as closed minded and stubborn." I'm interested if that behavior a result of just social conditioning, or if it's actually innate. Like maybe some caveman era drive to be aggro/dominate is hardwired in XY biology?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 06:37 PM
5

I forgot which sub but a redditor once wrote something (and i am paraphrasing) that stuck with me: "Your first thought is how society conditioned you to respond, and your second thought is how you consciously choose to respond."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 03:24 PM
70

Males want to be right, not be factually accurate. We discuss to communicate, understand, and find common ground. Males discuss to dominate and win.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 02:43 PM
10

I thought this was satire so i googled him. What a sad man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 03:54 AM
13

So cute!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 03:47 AM
152

The women they actually go to bed with are also imaginary
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 03:36 PM
12

Joe from "YOU" is conventionally attractive, this kid doesn't even have that going.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 01:02 AM
12

I feel so sad when women think they're overreacting, when in fact they are completely reasonable-reacting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 12:58 AM
62

r/AreTheStraightsOK
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 12:55 AM
8

Is it really a failure when a bad relationship isn't allowed to continue any further? That seems like a win.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 12:11 AM
13

Sounds like OP doesn't see a need to join assets or get legally married, she's enjoying the benefits of an exclusive relationship while making her own boundaries clear. That's my goal too!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 09:08 PM
75

I support women who choose celibacy and women who choose marriage! Neither are for me but i'm not gonna yuk your yum.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 06:56 PM
84

Gaslighting requires a certain level of intelligence to pull off and he... doesn't have it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 06:49 PM
3

Oh nooooo ew! Hope that gym had a good "no creeps" policy, though I know this varies pretty wildly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 06:35 PM
1

I've never thought about this. My BF would drop everything.... but my emergency contacts are still my brothers and (female) best friends, haha. Trust issues I guess.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 05:41 PM
7

I used to get catcalled even when i was in stained ratty gym clothes, some males are really just that desperate for attention.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 05:33 PM
45

Failed terribly? I think you won by never talking to him again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 05:23 PM
21

A lot of WM specifically want to date (east)AF, and a lot of AF specifically do not want to date AM. This is actually a pretty common point of contention in Asian communities; the boys are bitter about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 04:54 PM
10

Gahh long dick pokey ouch no fun Can men plz normalize being proud of their regular average sized dicks instead of this "bigger the better" nonsense
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 01:52 PM
61

What.... what are models supposed to wear? Not regular clothes?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 01:45 PM
150

"I noticed her heaving bosoms as she breastily boobed down the boob boob boob"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 01:45 PM
1

Doesn't make me feel good to see my maintenance kcal labeled as "starving" either. A lot of ED communities post numbers behind a TW or spoiler for this reason. Comparison helps nobody.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 01:43 PM
4

When has this sub EVER pushed "spending your hard earned cash on making yourself look fuckable to men?" That's the antithesis of FDS. Let women enjoy makeup and heels if they want to. Support other women. That's what FDS is about. The majority of these comments are nothing but supportive. You're reading what you want to read in order to confirm your pre-existing bias.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 01:35 PM
4

I only have anecdotal evidence to support it, but I believe it. All the more reason for OP to see another doctor. Fat women sometimes have to push hard to get a proper diagnosis because some doctors just straight up ignore their actual concerns, they just tell the patient to manage their weight.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 01:21 PM
7

I don't agree with your personal definition of high-value, since it's not my aesthetic. Each to their own though. When I think of a generic high-maintenance woman I think of the powerful women I see around office in Manhattan. Here's some details I've noticed: Has good skin, obviously knows her skin type well and caters to it. Clearly invested time and $ in skincare. Well-applied makeup. Concealer and foundation that match. Neutral eyes without dramatic liner. Red or pink lip that isn't too bold…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 01:10 PM
6

This messaging should be reinforced more often. A lot of women also don't realize a soft or nonverbal "no" is still "no." They think it can't count as rape because they weren't kicking and screaming, or otherwise didn't try hard enough to stop it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 12:19 PM
7

Get a 2nd opinion if your periods are consistently that long and heavy, might as well be cautious and rule out something more serious. Being fat and stressed doesn't mean it can't be endo/PCOS/something else.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 12:09 PM
3

You're not alone, I don't even like being touched at all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 12:05 PM
42

She's awesome!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 12:00 PM
29

it's common to want what you can't have
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 11:59 AM
26

Long nails doesn't prevent you from doing laundry anyway? Haters gonna hate i guess.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 04:49 PM
3

In my apt (and most in my area) heat is controlled by the building manager. I didn't even know thermostat struggles were a thing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 01:58 AM
11

What's the line between "being supportive" vs "building someone up?"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 04:30 PM
16

There was a male on that thread gushing about how OP is the ideal GF and how he'd never find someone like her. Getting those sympathy points. (What is he even doing on a women-only subreddit anyway?)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 02:27 PM
6

Yeah I can't even begin to process what's going on in her mind. Even the other RPW posters take issue with that line.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 02:09 PM
2

What is "talk to her about her?"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 09:36 PM
22

It's easy to get a skewed view of real-life because reddit is full of redpill incels. Tho "attractive" is mutually exclusive with "male redditor" so that's one clue, lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 09:16 PM
5

I love stories like this, concrete examples are very helpful!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 11:04 PM
3

It's an older tradition that seems to be losing popularity in Millennial wedding ceremonies. I've never seen it done in person.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 10:50 PM
12

What i’d give to be a tall amazonian goddess lol. 5ft here, i know that feel *lolsob*
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 12:47 AM
1

Online dating seems to have become the norm now. In my city OkCupid and Hinge are the most popular apps. There's not many options for IRL dates at the moment though, but I assume this will improve as COVID restrictions are lessened. Check out r/raisedbynarcissists and r/NarcissisticAbuse for techniques and stories from other people in the same situation as you. There's a whole lot of information there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 12:40 AM
3

That's the gist of it! Or as they would say it "Submissive, but not a doormat." Their core strategy is to trust your "Captain" to provide for your financial/physical/emotional needs, and you as the "Second Mate" take care of day-to-day homemaking/cooking/child-raising. They do have some similarities to FDS though- serious vetting, not having sex immediately, LTR focused. A lot of the advice there is along the lines of: "He's not displaying Captain qualities, stop giving him more chances and find…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 12:17 AM
8

I had to unfollow that sub because it was making me too sad. But it was interesting to see their perspective.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 10:04 PM
16

Your "breakup worthy" and his are different. It doesn't make it any less real to you. I can't believe he has the audacity to tell YOU what your own boundaries are. Good riddance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 10:02 PM
2

The author is trying to say the concept of "feminine care" is SO deeply ingrained in us, that we carry over the attitude even to the bedroom.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 09:58 PM
208

Males just wanna win, they don't want to understand you or give empathy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 09:52 PM
4

My BF uses SLS-filled TOUGH GUY FOR MEN branded body washes. Makes me want to preach to him about how SLS dries skin out, but at least he showers?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 01:13 AM
11

Damn your friends are perceptive, I think i would have glanced over haircut/jewelry in a photo. An asshole face is pretty telling though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 10:11 PM
3

username checks out
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 10:05 PM
7

Man kids are growing up so much faster these days. I'm pretty sure boys my age still thought girls had cooties back when I was 12.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 10:04 PM
7

What did your friends see in a photo that you didn't notice before?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 09:42 PM
20

He failed to stand up for you when a group of girls flocked around him when a "Hey friends meet my GIRLFRIEND" would have been easy and appropriate. That's enraging. On top of that he's trivializing how upset you are. Does he add a net positive benefit to your life? Or a net negative? BTW if you believe you're overthinking or having repetitive thoughts, or want to change your thought patterns, that's something you can work on. A lot of people over-analyze in their heads. But you're not the probl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 07:02 PM
24

Meanwhile, pet owners: "Look at my cat! LOOK at my cat!"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 06:44 PM
37

I agree with this guy- "skincare" and "skin health" should absolutely be normalized for men. The stigma that it's feminine/unmanly to buy face wash needs to die- but men should be the ones doing the work, not women. The only ones mocking men for having an interest in skincare... are other men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 06:15 PM
5

Expensive lesson learned! Don't blame yourself for not knowing better back then, when you were always socialized to nurture your male partner and put yourself last. (You don't know what you don't know, right?) At least you wised up quickly and it was 8 months and not 8 years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 06:05 PM
20

She thought he wasn't lying when he promised to stop, but he was. Poor OP, she just didn't know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 05:47 PM
5

We all know the same guy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 03:59 PM
35

I think the point is that even a truly committed man can decide to un-commit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 03:08 PM
8

It's not about having a "real" bed frame, it's about the thoughtfulness and intention that goes into the physical space where you park your flesh body for 6-8hrs a day. I don't like being too far off the ground, so i prefer a minimalist low frame with no box spring.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 03:02 PM
3

My school's sex ed was basically: "This is what happens to the penis during intercourse. Now, don't have sex or you will get an STD on your peepee." Not even a mention of what happens to the vagina during intercourse, nevermind the context of a sexual relationship. Really didn't prepare boys or girls for adulthood at all lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 01:59 PM
1

It makes me kinda uneasy also, especially because apparently OP isn't actually Japanese!? He's just lumping all east of asia into one homogeneous thing when "kawaii culture" is specifically a Japanese trope.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 01:52 AM
1

It can be applied to a child but the word just means "cute." Like a big eyed baby deer or something. I think OP's bf has watched too much anime.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 11:16 PM
11

Ikr? How dare employees enjoy gardening? That's not work related!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 07:35 PM
22

Imagine parading your insecurity around like this tho.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 06:27 PM
32

This mentality is encouraged by tech recruiters, programmers are expected to code at work and also have side-projects to write more code. It's really sad because it creates a whole class of worker drones that aren't well-rounded.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 06:23 PM
2

In the USA I think terrible sex education is in part to blame for that. Even a lot of young women don't realize that dubious consent and "giving in" may be counted as rape. I definitely didn't learn this until after university, consent wasn't even brought up in high school sex ed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 06:18 PM
16

When i was in school girls were still very catty and passive aggressive towards each other. It seems like young girls these days are way more supportive, but we still have a long way to go.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 06:12 PM
11

Men need to do the work then. They need to stop pushing the "boys don't cry" narrative on each other.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 01:29 AM
79

Rapists already know that rape is a crime- they just don't care.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 01:23 AM
16

Unfuckingbelievable i am so angry just reading that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 01:14 AM
2

LOL I didn't notice the timestamps in the img preview
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 01:28 AM
3

i wanted to be a janitor when i grew up lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 04:53 PM
1

Not at the moment (plus my city is still quarantined anyway) but that's a great idea!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 04:50 PM
35

It's the same as the "I'm not racist, but" and whatever they say next will be totally racist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 10:32 PM
3

oh man i thought i was browsing r/FundieSnark for a second
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 10:29 PM
6

Have you seen an increase or decrease of divorce cases since people have been quarantined? Or has it stayed the same?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 10:21 PM
11

ngl tho (minus having to pay) I'd love to clean in silence at a women only retreat. Sounds very zen lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 10:16 PM
19

I thought promise rings were exclusively an underage thing? Like it's a promise to get married once the couple turns 18? When did this change or was I misinformed this entire time?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 07:03 PM
2

I've seen zero pubes in porn as early as 10-15 years ago, when I was a sad teenager wandering down the dark corners of the internet lol. These days there's plenty of "tips and tricks" all over reddit and it does seem like a standard practice for young women. I also see a lot of posts about insecurities over their "ugly" labia. Nobody I've ever been with had any comments either, maybe because the men that really care about it are in a younger age bracket.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 04:08 PM
2

The old "customer is always right" mentality really needs to die. The customer is wrong almost all of the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 03:44 PM
4

Yeah curious about that too, is this thread off topic?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 09:46 PM
3

Workaholism is so real tho!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 09:13 PM
36

I agree but it's also healthy to question why a pretty feature is pretty. Like do i actually think bald genitals are pretty or did i just mindlessly accept it because i read some article telling me to shave?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 08:04 PM
1

Not the life for me but if a woman wants to be the housewife (jetwife?) of a rich guy then more power to her. At least their kid won't ever go hungry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 07:50 PM
14

ROFL that was a wild ride, all the best to her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 07:40 PM
3

LOL that was my first thought too!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 05:51 PM
5

Your personal definition of a romantic gesture might be something completely different and that's totally fine. Just because it's her thing doesn't mean it's everyone's thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 05:48 PM
8

IDK what it is about having tattoos but everyone i know (men and women!) with visible tattoos have similar stories of getting unwanted touch from strangers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 05:28 PM
20

When I worked retail a senior man once grabbed my arm and lifted up my tshirt sleeve to examine my tattoos. Awkward.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 04:05 PM
16

When it comes to "was that racist?" i will opt to believe the black woman. DH has some issues to work through, I don't think therapy is a bad idea actually.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 03:58 PM
85

I feel like teens today have it waaay harder than i did back then. No envy there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 04:10 AM
24

Wait 30s is considered "older" now? Aw man
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 04:01 AM
4

The best scenario is that you have incompatible love languages, which is reason enough to break up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 12:06 AM
9

It's a from a tiktok trend comparing "hiiii girls" and "bruh girls." It's exactly as dumb as it sounds lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 11:50 PM
16

He doesn't know what he's wishing for lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 11:36 PM
18

What insane reality show is this?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 11:34 PM
20

The bar is buried in the fucking earth, i don't envy young girls.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 11:21 PM
7

The Handbook is great template but it's not a color-by-numbers guide. We still have to do the work to adapt the core principles to our own unique situations. Make it your own personal dating strategy, in order to get what YOU want.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 03:49 PM
4

What was the incident at the 6 month mark?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 05:55 AM
3

And we can't even do my favorite part of fighting/arguments soooo... Huh? Who has a favorite part of fighting? Who likes to fight?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 07:39 PM
-2

You may be a sex-repulsed asexual, somewhere on the demi/ace spectrum, or maybe just plain not sexually attracted to men. Whatever label you end up identifying with, you're not weird.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 07:36 PM
29

Why should I be sorry that I don't want ugly people hitting on me? This is such a mood why have i literally never had this thought cross my mind in my entire life? Like I actually felt guilty for having preferences lolsob
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 11:04 AM
21

Yeah but we already get a lot of "upfront interest" from other guys. 🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 03:39 AM
36

I'd like to nominate the following: Go to therapy Meditate Drink water instead of soda
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 02:42 AM
1

Which subreddit is this that has a "Remorse" flair?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 02:34 AM
8

You're never to old to learn the truth about males! It's okay! I mean that's what I keep telling myself anyway, lolsob
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 02:05 AM
50

I feel so bad for women bartenders, they seem to get it the worst out of all customer facing jobs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 03:43 AM
154

I'm glad that sub voted overwhelmingly in favor of YTA. The few NTA votes I skimmed were saying she should be grateful to get a free trip at all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 03:40 AM
188

Reddit votes him TA. Top comment: "Don’t worry about the cost of her coach ticket - I suspect you’ll not need to pay for her ticket anyway as you’ll be taking that trip by yourself."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 03:37 AM
1

Oh man my BF is like that- talks a lot but slow to actually change anything. He's quit with the askhole bullshit with me at least.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 04:37 PM
16

Oh wow TIL about "askholes!" I wonder if that's just the way some people are wired or if it's a symptom of disorder?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 03:12 AM
16

Wait, is that a trope?! Tell me more please.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 03:04 AM
69

My BF asked for an "opinion" when he was frustrated with a creative project, and then proceeded to counter all my ideas and explain why they suck. I told him if he just wanted validation to just say so he's never asked again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 02:24 AM
5

What's an LTC?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 12:55 AM
13

In some parts of the US everybody still (especially older people) uses pet names like honey, sweetheart, dear, etc to strangers. So it could be cultural, or it could be he's just trying to infantalize us. Men in the former category can at least un-learn that kind of speech.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 12:49 AM
103

rofl the way she says "You don't need your ex back.... you need a HOBBY"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 09:14 PM
5

I just bought the book after reading this thread- seems like important knowledge.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 08:31 PM
6

Companies only care about why you left because they want to avoid a candidate with a history of making a lot of HR complaints, being involved in scandals, repeatedly being poor cultural fit, etc. They just want to avoid a potential liability. "Want to try something new" is a perfectly legit reason to give to a recruiter/hiring manager. You could maybe say you learned the ins-and-outs of the entire company over such a long time, and that you felt too bored and want something fresh and challenging…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 08:04 PM
8

Funny how it's always the most sensitive babies that make fun of everyone else for being "dramatic."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 07:38 PM
4

This is a good reminder that anyone can fake a personality for a few months. He was on his "best behavior" but couldn't keep it up anymore. Time to move on!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 06:32 AM
41

"yOu'Re DiFfeReNt FrOm OtHeR gIrLs"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 06:40 PM
246

My ex used to say I'm making a big deal out of things and then repeat what i said in a high-pitched voice. My voice is naturally low-pitched.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 06:35 PM
2

Lemme just shove my emotions down because my husband can't deal with it, sounds really healthy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 06:33 PM
26

That's funny, "STFU" is literally the technique recommended by r/RedPillWomen. No, it's really one of their strategies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 10:11 PM
11

I also find that weird. It wouldn't personally bring me any fulfillment but I support her happiness!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 07:35 PM
44

rofl wtf women can't even reject male advances without the fear of them literally murdering us. how can that possibly ever be better?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 03:32 AM
28

She almost mentioned in the comments of the thread that she got new BC and it's been causing brain fogginess. BC side effects are no joke, poor OP!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 03:10 AM
68

I actually do love cleaning but i don't love being a mommy. This is gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 02:16 AM
3

Wow I thought i was just emotional overeating when i get extra hunger before my period!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 02:12 AM
-15

It's very common to ask to split a check 50/50, not so common to straight up ask the girl to pay.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 09:56 PM
2

It is really unfortunate that males are socialized to avoid therapy and introspection because it's not "manly."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 09:33 PM
96

Nobody is going to be his future wife, hopefully.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 02:22 PM
3

lol is this r/menwritingwomen ?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 01:38 AM
72

I get so tired of reading that sub because every comment is: "Have you tried cOmUniCaTinG"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 01:17 AM
7

I'm sure she already knows nothing positive will come out of the conversation- OP is looking for encouragement not answers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 10:31 PM
9

Don't do it! Do not engage!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 10:28 PM
28

Compliments (re. appearance) from women feel so much more validating because they actually know how much effort it took to make my eyes look symmetrical.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 04:31 AM
17

Cramping is normal but it sounds like u/bulkymoose had it particularly bad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 12:08 AM
3

I would have ignored his call out of sheer frustration honestly. Hope you're doing better today.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 09:03 PM
20

LOL I can't handle the amount of machismo
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 01:02 AM
11

I'm sorry you had a shit day- I have c-ptsd issues as well and it sucks. What did he do after you didn't respond?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 12:19 AM
13

What a nightmare :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 12:09 AM
1

Oh well, thanks for checking though! I wanted to check if my experience aligns with those women- I never got very deep into BDSM but am changing my mind about the entire thing since starting to lurk FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 03:01 PM
1

I'd love to read through that subreddit if it still exists!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 12:41 AM
2

Congrats on your weight loss! You can lose an additional 170lb by throwing away this toxic asshole.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 10:55 PM
1

The only reason to shave is to shave for yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/20 09:07 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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