TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

wisstinks4 Archive

View 2 posts and 643 comments by wisstinks4 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
8

wisstinks4/r/Divorce_Men07/04/23 12:26 PM
2

Spousal Support / Alimonywisstinks4/r/Divorce_Men12/05/24 06:28 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
8

Unless you have a prenuptial agreement to protect yourself. It’s a no-win situation for a guy. Did judicial system and family court is broken. I encourage all young men who are dating or engaged to get a legal document in place to protect their assets.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 03:41 AM
24

I dont trust women in these situations. Beware. She wants something. Dont eat anything she cooks. No sex with her. Ask for intent. This is a ploy to get you over a barrel. Only phone calls. Less tempting. Ask questions like, why?
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/24 05:36 PM
1

Touché
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/24 01:38 AM
2

OP, I love your attitude. Sounds like she had mental health issues and didn’t see life through the same lenses as the rest of us. Applaud you for getting out when you did. She sounds like a mentally unhealthy person and unfortunately you invested 15 years but now you can escape and find a better partner. Wishing you the best. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/24 12:22 AM
3

Maybe so. But I know the woman cheated and put me here. It’s on her, not me. I’m trying to sort out the truth with honesty, respect and trust. If any of those core three are broken, we might as well part-ways and wish each other a nice life.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/24 01:17 AM
1

Bro, she treated you poorly for no apparent reason. I see no reason to hold back. If it were me, I would drop the nuclear bomb and make that life as difficult as possible. Then apologize to your kid for having a WW slutty mom who gives up her kitty to men other than your Dad.
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/24 07:40 PM
2

You need to decide if its cheaper to keep her or can you live better without her. It sounds like she is unattractive, let herself go and weighs 300lbs. Your mental health is critical. Ask her to move into the spare room and carry on.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/24 12:44 PM
6

Was it worth the cost of ruining your marriage and family to cheat?
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/24 05:41 AM
2

Can your legal team point out this is a false claim perpetrated by a vindictive crazy bitch person? There is no evidence. Its fake. Unproven. Sue her for slander. I would get the narrative out to family and friends your ex is loco and making false claims. Pure evil. Does she fly in on a broom?
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/24 01:26 AM
4

I heard SC is favorable to men in divorce if they can prove cheater by the wife. Wishing you well.
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/24 03:55 AM
3

OP, your stbxw is highly toxic, abusive and un fucking safe. Get away from her and take your son with you. She needs a psych eval and to be locked up. Run.
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/24 03:40 AM
7

Try to stay in house. Dont move out. Move to spare room, basement. Set up a new bedding, bedroom for you. This will help you. Go grayrock, turn her off, no contact unless about your son. Ignore her.
/r/Divorce_Men15/07/24 11:36 AM
10

OP, It’s great you stood up for you. Disrespect of a spouse is always a deal-breaker. She does it over and over. Your wife is toxic, running you down. Another negative, Her mom adds too much hot sauce and ruins your marriage dynamic. In Biblical language, your spouse never did the leave (her parents) and cleave (to you) process. She needs her mom to validate her actions. A strong man says no more bad behavior towards me. Set your new boundaries and go live life. I’m sure she and her mom will be …
/r/Divorce_Men15/07/24 02:15 AM
5

This is such a minimized story line. It happens more often than we hear. I wish there was more information on gray divorce. Cheating can occur at any age. Stupid choices have horrible consequences. Good for you to say no to betrayal. Standing up for you.
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/24 12:49 PM
3

OP, she doesn’t wanna seem like the bad guy so she won’t confess or admit to anything. The best way to get past that hurdle is gather irrefutable evidence. Go to your phone company and get copies of all her texts for the last three years. Pay the fee or whatever it costs and then you’ll know. you could also follow John around and see what he’s up to. Secret meetings with a married woman. Based on what you’ve listed in the story, there’s one key area that has me very concerned. In a healthy relat…
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/24 02:52 PM
3

She is clearly delusional, her own expectations, don’t align with reality. She was also given bad advice, and she believed it. Now you’re in a cluster bomb situation and to get her aligned with reality will take time and effort.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 03:18 PM
8

It sounds like you’re miserable. Dont be a people pleaser. Take care of you. Go see the world. Send her a post card every other month; Alaska, Hawaii, Peru (Machu Pechu), Argentina, Brazil, Europe, Asia, Australia/NZ. It’s ok to close that chapter in life and write a new chapter, as a solo traveler or with a new friend. Enjoy your retirement. Be safe. Dont drink the water.
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/24 05:09 AM
9

She sounds selfish and out of touch. Its best if you let her go be a fatty for some other guy. This is where you say, “I dont want to hold you back, so I’ll let you move on to other men who share your same sexual (uk) Appetite. Take care now. Gotta run.”
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/24 01:59 AM
5

A legal issue. Call it out to a judge. Repeat her words or write it up in a statement. OP, Just know you’re not alone and I’m miserable shitty marriage. I know so many men who suffer from this today. Women are insufferable: treat men like ATM’s, no love, no sex, disrespect, broken trust, dishonest. It’s miserable.
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/24 09:47 AM
-1

You can take your opinion and fo
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/24 07:09 PM
5

Yes. Why subject yourself to the pain. Unless you like that shit. I would go some where else. I would also be petty. Start leaking her confession to ruin her image because it’s fake and a big fat lie. She deserves to suffer some consequences for her bad behavior.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/24 03:56 PM
6

Time for tracking skills.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/24 02:40 PM
10

You’re getting paid. Ask for Spouse support.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/24 02:39 PM
7

I’ve seen posts on other subs where women claim to be devastated. But with the power of the pen, you don’t really know if that’s true. I’m of the opinion. men have a stronger connection to marriages than women. Women have a connection to family and children. men have a connection to marriage, men invest effort to make marriage safe, well provided, make it good and right. This could be another example of how men and women are disconnected. Marriage is hard.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 03:39 PM
16

OP, sad to read your story. She sounds like a selfish person. It feels like your baby trapped. I would not accept it. She is working you down. I see a couple options: Go greyrock. Complete 180, no contact, ignore. Turn the game around on her. Go live your life as a single guy. Get your game on. Or lawyer up and dump her. There is No need for you to be treated poorly. Document her focus on older kids and her lack of interest in mothering your little girl. Get full custody and leave her in the dus…
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/24 03:16 AM
2

No. I would not pursue marriage. Just smashing.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 04:39 AM
7

Make sure your lawyer points out the tro is lacking merit and proves your stbxw is causing frivolous legal activity. Wasting time, money and resources.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/24 04:53 PM
3

Is this frivolous? Any merit to her claims?
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/24 04:25 PM
6

You mentioned all the bad stuff. What about the good stuff? You don’t miss kissing, hugs, a person holding you in their arms. Those are low level intimacy acts that can boost your connection.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 04:30 PM
6

Big and strong OP. Fight for you and your child.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/24 05:50 PM
15

Thats a Hard No ffing way.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/24 05:47 PM
14

I could never do this. She divorces me we are not friends. That relationship is now closed. Bye.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/24 01:40 PM
1

I’ll be the contrarian in this one. Can this marriage be saved with better communication? I want this action from our closeness time together. I dont want your bitchy words in my ear all the time. Is there any way to save it? Could she change. Whatever you decide to do I hope it works out well for you, actually both of you. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/24 09:02 PM
2

Yes it is. Go watch youtube videos on how to interact with men/women, make friends. Get out there.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 12:02 PM
5

Get out of the house. Go places. Meet people. Coffee shops, library, volunteer, serve at church, animal shelter. Go do things to interact and build friendships.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 05:00 AM
4

Its a very easy out for her. She is lying. Check on her things. There is more going on. Boyfriend, affair. It’s too easy. Saying everything is ok then boom, I want a D. Make her spill the tea.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/24 04:52 AM
2

OP. Go Grayrock on her ass. Do a full 180. No contact. Ignore her. Go live your life to the best of your ability. There may be some nice women in your future. Get out there. Your wife is dragging you. Cut the cord. Say something like it’s not her it’s you. You just want her to be free to go find herself.
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/24 05:49 PM
2

It feels like you were playing a card game, you had the ace of hearts, you were holding it until the end. If it were me, I would’ve said something sooner. Timing wasn’t great, this is an expected result. It’s really going to depend if she’s a bigger person who can get over it or if she’s gonna hold it against you. Tough situation. Wait it out.
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/24 05:39 PM
2

Yes, there is. You and your lawyer can prove this guy is a danger to others, especially your children. A judge or mediator this guy is not responsible to be around children and you as the primary parent don’t want your kids in harms way or any dangerous situations.
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/24 12:01 AM
8

Time is a healer. Your feelings are legitimate. It’s sounds like she was the reason for the break up. First, on your days, Plan great outings with your children. Make it special Dad /children time. Second, For your own mental health, you need to get through the anger, betrayal, dishonesty, and disrespect she showed you. I would go gray rock, do the 180, and no contact unless it’s for the kids. Cut her out of your space. Focus on these two things and you’ll be a happier person. Wishing you well i…
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/24 01:35 PM
3

Yes. Mine was $125. Some will offer a free hour some will not.
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/24 08:46 PM
2

This sounds like it really sucks to have this annual probe up yer butt financially. Divorce court is broken on so many levels.
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/24 01:15 PM
1

Talk to your lawyer about positioning this potential change. Ask your Dad for advice. Dad’s are kinda smart too.
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/24 03:10 AM
1

Protect yourself and your children. The outlaws need to be 500 feet away. Your legal team needs to step up and fix this immediately and for the future. Not cool.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/24 12:21 PM
3

OP, she twisted this kid. And unfortunately, he bought it. You need to twist him back and stop this behavior . You got 11 more years with this kidyou’re crazy ex bitch. You gotta fix this soon. No more face time when he’s at your house.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/24 03:48 AM
5

This sounds like a wacky form of guilt. She has mental health issues. Based on your story, there’s no other way. I can describe high read that. You should copy that text and send it to all your family and friends. Proving her to be alone. Glad to hear you’ve moved on and found someone else. Glad you have a great relationship with your kids. I’m sure the next few years of weddings and funerals will be awkward. Wishing you well. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/24 01:08 PM
9

OP stop what you’re doing. Your son needs a father. That’s you. Take a few minutes and rethink any decisions. Pick up the phone and call for help crisis hotline. National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK(8255)
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/24 03:35 AM
3

I would spill the tea anonymously. Leave a note on her car, send to her work.
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/24 06:55 PM
13

Another example how divorce court is ripping men to pieces. The whole divorce legalities is ‘effing broken. Why can’t some divorced legal eagles fix this shitty system? Why?
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 11:55 PM
4

Your boyfriend has lots of baggage. Kudos to you for your commitment to invest in the relationship. You may need more than a lawyer here to prove all the madness his STBXW is doing. She sounds like a very bad woman with bigly issues; money, poor parenting choices and more. In the end, you guys need to win this thing and move on quickly. These other people are toxic and will cause more chaos in your lives. Wishing you well as you sort this out.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/24 01:10 PM
-4

Dont do it.
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/24 06:17 PM
1

Batting practice at the batting cafe for 3 hours. Just keep pumping tokens in the slot. Trust me you’ll feel better when it’s over.
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/24 07:00 PM
1

A true conundrum. From one faithful guy to another. Release the Kraken. Find a nice women.
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/24 02:54 AM
5

I’m not sure I see the benefit in doing this. What’s your goal? To make her feel bad. It may not work. Think of a different way to do it or not do it. Let go of the thing; emotionally, mentally.
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/24 02:07 PM
1

I agree here. Don’t limit your children’s interaction with the Mom. You could foot the bill for flowers but say they came from the kids and then go for a walk around the block to let them give her gifts and enjoy mother and children time.
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/24 04:09 AM
3

What is the risk of just asking her? Is she the one that filed or did you? Why do you care? You can ask her and see what they tell you maybe they’ll be honest. Someone cheat? So many questions.
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/24 05:30 AM
5

Is she evil enough to try and off you? Get cameras and catch someone doing nefarious activity. You cant live this way. Find it. Fix it. Stop it. Protect yourself. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/24 02:21 PM
9

Hmm…Women, changing their minds. One minute its yes, next its no. It’s amazing they can function in society. The no win zone for men. Hence the reason so many of us have said screw it, it’s not worth it.
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/24 05:05 AM
3

I hope you hit record to capture her alternate universe mind set. If not, start now. She may not be fully present in all things. I just read about a person who had a small mass pressing on their amigliya causing them to make terrible decisions. Health issues in crisis moments is a real thing.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/24 01:08 PM
3

Manipulation requires a response. No response by you defeats the shady ploy. Or, go right up to the guy and give him your product overview of this woman and her defect flaws.
/r/Divorce_Men26/04/24 04:59 AM
6

I agree 100%. Family court just Lincoln Tunnel fucks the man.
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/24 01:55 PM
4

For the most part, yes. We still have a self-righteous people, but we’re just ignore them.
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/24 02:49 AM
3

Did she cheat? Are you still in the house with children? Wishing you well through this difficult time.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/24 04:09 PM
1

Did she cheat? Are you still in the house with children? Wishing you well through this difficult time.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/24 04:09 PM
13

No. It could have some variation of this scenario. Women lose their minds as their marriages end. They feel like a failure in the relationship. Then take it out on the stbxh, it’s wacky shit. However, if they cheated, you become invisible like you never existed. More crazy shit. Moral: dont get married, dont get divorced. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/24 03:27 AM
3

Find a steady place to be safe. The waves of life, legal, financial, emotional and more will rock your world. It would be good if you can get some help. Can you talk with a family member, close personal friend, pastor, counselor to help you through the hard conversations and thought process?
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/24 02:36 AM
4

I agree the family courts are broken and they punished the man more than anything. Is there any chance you can leave out and get off the grid and go find a small town in Alaska or South america.
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/24 11:06 PM
1

Go grayrock, do the 180, no contact. Ignore hard. You gotta be gone a lot. Find a new place to hang out away from house.
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/24 01:14 PM
5

OP, this is a valid issue today in many marriages. You have every right to ask why not me? Biblically, her behavior would qualify as abandonment and it would meet the criteria for divorce. She broke the contract. Consequences are inevitable.
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/24 04:46 AM
2

That’s unusual for a woman to be asking for more money. Slimy gold diggers be gone. We, real men of earth, banish you to the far away lands of Willie Wonka, Wizard of Oz and Kansas to listen to Toto. Protect your hard earned monies, retirement, personal assets and pension. Be safe Men.
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/24 05:44 PM
4

Lawyer, tracking devices, split money, get out.
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/24 06:23 PM
1

Agreed. Its a painful lonely existence.
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/24 05:14 PM
6

I see it as a type of abandonment. Almost abuse. Mostly done by a detached person. Its sad. On her end it’s comfortability. Lax approach to life. For him, its killing him to not be loved. Can this be fixed by learning love languages or better communication?
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/24 12:21 PM
2

Not only messy for kids but costly for you. You need to assess the cost to value ratio? Is it worth it? She is a liar and cheat to make her life easy. Ask your lawyer to grind her balls over this shitty move.
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/24 04:31 AM
1

This is abuse. Over control. Toxic. You need to escape. She is a narcissist and from what you describe may have mental health issues. I would never stay. Find someone with connections to help you disappear. She’s running you into the ground. You do not want to live your retirement years having to babysit or take care of this person. It would be horrible. What do you think your daughter wants so far away for school? Escape.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/24 01:16 PM
5

Sounds like a good example how a person can meltdown when the marriage breaks - destroys the family, destroying her life and now she wants to destroy others. This is dangerous. Be safe. I hope it doesn’t end in anyone losing their life. She needs mental health help.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/24 04:40 AM
2

Touche
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/24 03:54 PM
5

Keep smashing. Way to go. Of course things can change if either one of you finds someone better. That will throw a wrench in your plans. Better have an exit strategy and ready to implement as needed.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/24 04:10 AM
1

What facts are you referring to?
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 05:00 PM
0

That’s OK it’s a very personal experience. This is just your opinion which is fine. Everyone has a different perspective.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 02:26 PM
5

I dated a girl who was so dedicated to her Catholic faith that she didn’t even recognize or understand other beliefs in Christian faith could be different than hers. Specifically the difference between Catholic and protestant. She wasn’t willing to explore any conversations outside her own small world. Currently she’s divorced with four kids, it’s difficult to break through her barriers. I fear she will be alone the rest of her days. it’s a sad tale.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/24 02:24 PM
4

The horrible shit sandwich legal system in our country sucks so badly. Men get mugged at every corner. Just awful.
/r/Divorce_Men30/03/24 11:17 AM
1

Biblical divorce is typical for infidelity and abandonment. I agree God does not endose divorce. OP, let’s focus on you and. Obviously, your wife did some thing for this to happen. Let’s say she was unfaithful. You found for divorce. And now you’re working through the last stages. At some point you’re going to need to be OK with the results. I believe the Holy Spirit insert attractions in Texas. This may be the same in your case. At some point you’re going to have to move on. Did your best and i…
/r/Divorce_Men29/03/24 04:27 AM
1

I play Evil Woman as my wake up alarm every day- it drives her nuts. She says you need to change your alarm song. Nope. I said, serves you right for being a cheater. ELO.
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/24 05:41 AM
0

Take the whole thing off the table by going to see a lawyer and getting the process started. Have her served at work empty done with it. She roll Rohling, a phone pull up your barn door right now. The level of disrespect, broken, trust and lack of honestythree main failures in a relationship. Why stay?
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/24 02:05 AM
4

OP, sorry you’re going through this right now. Congrats on taking your vows seriously. It seems many people don’t feel that way these days. Clearly your wife was enjoying all the attention you were on her as a faithful husband. Her lack of recognition proves she is delusional and doesn’t understand the value of a good husband. Burger. Damage goods.
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/24 01:39 AM
2

I like the stop drinking. Have 1 for fun. Then stop. No getting wasted. As far as dating for fun or for smashing, determine what you want next. Who is the ideal woman. Find a goid partner who gives 100% of her effort to you and the relationship.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/24 03:11 AM
3

Get your tunes going. Music.
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/24 04:30 AM
1

He can fill the crappy guy role for her. He is hooked up with a cheater. Glad to hear your kids dont respect either of them. This is justice.
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/24 08:42 AM
11

OP, no question this move by your ex is low, evil and vile. Any spouse who weaponizes their children against the other spouse has become a negative narcissist persona. Glad to hear you dumped her and got away. I hope and trust your relationship with your children is doing better and they know and love you as solid father figure. I also hope you’ve gone gray rock, done the 180 and no contact with your ex to prove to her that she’s fired, not worth your time and energy. People that fall down this …
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/24 03:22 PM
1

OP, nothing wrong with a good healthy vent/rant. Sorry you’re going through this with your wayward wife. She sounds confused. Is there anyway she can be unconfused by talking with her mom, sister, your mom, your sister, someone to slap some common sense back into her head? if she refuses any rational help then you know she’s lost to the dogs. Wishing you well as you navigate the situation. Thanks for the post. It was very helpful. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/24 06:44 PM
2

This is very unhealthy. There is a much bigger story going on the background. You’re being played like you’re a small in a Milton Bradley board game. She’s pregnant. Go talk to her friends and family. Put a tracker on her car. You need some answers before you do anything.you’re getting in a bad way. You need to stop and slow down.
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/24 12:34 PM
4

OP, you did nothing wrong. She broke marriage trust by letting the rx back in her head. She disrespected you with this ex. She was not honest with you about her feelings and her intent. Close the chapter, epilogue, you can let go and move on. Close that book. Pick up a new book, write your next story. It starts now.
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/24 11:46 AM
3

OP, I think you’re being overly harsh on yourself. I think people go through seasons in life. When you and your ex were dating, she was into men at the time. Obviously, when she cheated, she was into men. Somewhere along the way someone got her interested in women and that’s when she changed. Do not look at it as a reflection on you. She was in a confused state of mind, and she was easily influencedto switch teams and hit for the other side. Stop beating yourself up. Focus on being a great dad, …
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/24 04:19 AM
5

There are so many ways to look at this. You avoided being on the hook with this chick. You got out at a good time to avoid the mess later. She was never loyal and faithful to you. This other guy will have to deal with the cheater for the rest of his life. She is damaged goods in the head and in the heart and you don’t need that extra baggage in your life. Guaranteed you can find a better woman. I agree, she did move on fast. My guess is she had this guy lined up the whole time. Just make sure yo…
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/24 08:57 PM
7

OP, congratulations are in order for the win. It sounds like you didn’t get raped by a broken divorce legal system. I’m happy for you in that regard. I also applaud you for putting yourself number one and taking care of you and your mental health. Your attitude with your stbxw is healthy and pretty cool. At some point she will realize she made a major mistake with a low level AP that caused this whole thing to explode. My guess, she will live with a lot of regret. Wishing you well over the next …
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/24 09:51 PM
2

Good to get it out of your system. Stop beating yourself up over the mistakes and errors. We all do it. Need to determine how to move on. What does your next success look like? It could be as easy as roll out of bed, make the bed. Go conquer the day. The key is, you can do it.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/24 02:45 PM
5

The good thing about the gym is you can see the same people another day. Yes, it was a missed opportunity. But there is hope it could happen again. You might want to do some background legwork and find out a full name. Wishing you well in your pursuit of this hot number.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/24 01:14 PM
2

Yea, that former friend is pretty low. Lower than whale crap. That guy needs a visit from a few of your friends. A real Bush league guy. I like the advice from one of the other posters, delete him from your life, have nothing to do with him or his family. He doesn’t deserve your time and energy. You can find better friends that are loyal and true.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/24 01:01 PM
2

Good on you. Go get life.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/24 01:33 AM
4

Ask for blow jobs now.
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/24 02:16 PM
3

OP, I know I haven’t read a story this sad in awhile on Reddit. There could not be a more toxic person in your life right now. You need to flee this woman immediately. Take care of yourself. Congratulations on your escape, even if it’s in your van down by the river. Hopefully you got the dog too. your mental health and well-being is more important than anything right now. Hopefully your lawyer has stones as big as soccer balls and she can win this mess for you. Wishing you well over the next few…
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/24 08:54 PM
3

I hear this same protracted bullshit from friends who went through it. They hated life until the rain and clouds cleared. One buddy said it felt like a surviver show, living in the jungle during storm season, fighting for food and water. He was tired, mentally and physically exhausted. Congrats on fighting through the broken legal system set up by to screw men at every turn. Wishing you well. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/24 01:13 PM
5

No to self deletion. Its not worth it. Your children need you. Get to a better mental state. Go talk to a lawyer and find a way to make this work for you. Then re-group for children. Don’t worry about her or the kids right now. Take care of yourself, protect your assets. She is wearing you out. Once you figure out a way to get divorced and get away from her, you’ll be in a better place. There’s no doubt she is toxic, narcissistic, and unstable. From what you described, she may have mental health…
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 05:12 AM
3

There needs to be some boundaries. You could have your lawyer contact her lawyer and send a cease-and-desist about character, assassination, or slander and threatening a big lawsuit to get her to shut her mouth. If it were me, I would find a way to set some parameters she needs to stay in her lane and zip it and move on.
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/24 09:55 PM
2

Dump the bump attorney. Get a shark. Regroup and grow some balls. Go back and fight for what you think is right and fair for both of you and your soon to be ex-wife. Also, focus on being a great dad that will Trump anything you’re doing right now.
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/24 02:07 PM
5

Be the best Dad possible. Then focus on you. She can wait.
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/24 03:20 AM
3

Even marginal crazy ones still married because both teams know it’s a shit show out there.
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/24 02:21 AM
2

Be sure to update your story.
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/24 02:19 AM
3

Amen brother. Glad to hear you found your way back. Use this blessing of the new job to be a great dad to your kids. Hope you’re healing and finding a good spot in life.
/r/Divorce_Men29/02/24 01:53 AM
12

Hooray. Finally a big W for the home team. For all the men who work hard, provides for his child, only to see a WW blow it. It’s time for the hand of righteousness to repay the wrongs done by baby mama. Caught in her web of lies, deception, cheating the court and the Daddy. Way to go!!!
/r/Divorce_Men29/02/24 01:25 AM
3

Get off a shared plan. Leave her on the current plan. Start a new plan for you on monday. Carry on with the marriage crushing process.
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/24 05:03 AM
2

OP, I love GFY. Congrats on repaying the favor. It seems like in your case you’re going to have to take the L every once in a while. Stay strong and fight for your position in this battle.
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/24 02:16 PM
4

This has a chance to be positive, but it needs more legs underneath it. Posting here is only raising awareness. Someone needs to take it up and make it happen. I know some people in this situation and it is a real mental health issue. I admire what you’re trying to do.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/24 10:52 PM
1

I’d say your selection of lawyers was really bad. But that’d be ruthlessly obvious. Time to go find better legal counsel and get them to seriously work on your behalf. For what you earn 7000 a month sounds reasonable. And the duration of time. There should be an amount that you pay for the kid for child support until he’s 18. And then a shorter amount for spousal maintenance based on years of marriage. 17 years still too long.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/24 09:59 PM
7

No. Do not harm yourself or anyone else. Get up off the floor, dust yourself off and get going. Life is worth living, especially for your children. Have a goal to live to see them everyday. They need a father. You are that person. You are their father. They need you. Your family needs you. Do not give in. Do not give the woman any satisfaction she hurt you. Take time to get help, to heal and rebound to a new you. There is more to this dynamic life than a cheater woman. Call the crisis helpline, …
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/24 01:13 PM
5

Your ex is an evil woman. Tell your lawyer your ex is wasting the courts time, resources and your limited funds on these frivolous bs claims. Keep saying this, “only until 18”. Hopefully your ex moves to mars and the return flight gets cancelled due to front on the wings. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/24 01:18 PM
3

Yes, false claims. because the fucked up legal system is broken towards normal men like you. Can you lawyer up to protect yourself? Try to fight leaving your home as much as possible. If she is set on divorce, you being able to stay in your home will work in your favor.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 05:57 PM
2

My condolences on your exes decisions to ruin your marriage. It amazes me how many bad decisions are made in that scenario for a woman to keep going down the path of destruction, knowing it’s going to end badly. I could see a guy being a horn dog. I can’t see a woman being that deep in the fog to crush a happy marriage. Sorry for your loss.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 02:31 PM
1

The irony of it. The broken legal system just trashes men at the divorce table.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 02:29 PM
10

Dont do it. Here’s why. Most women when they break off a relationship, have mentally, physically, emotionally detached from their man long before they took action. You would need to look back six months or a year to see her struggle with when she was going to end the marriage. My guess, she cut you off from sex months ago and finally pulled the trigger to ask for a divorce. Instead, as you stated, focus on your children and yourself. pull yourself together and start mapping out a new plan for a …
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/24 01:24 PM
8

OP, great job, recognizing bad behavior, and seeking to protect your son and yourself if this goes sideways. By the way, how old is your son? It’s a very good move to invite a third-party for visual protection during drop offs. The fact that she never talk to you about her master plan is quite perplexing. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 10:50 PM
1

Amen. Drop the ‘effing hammer!!!
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 07:30 PM
1

I’ll be praying for you and this terrible situation.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 05:03 PM
1

Her personality is her anchor to your marriage. Any rationale marriage counselor will see her as a battle axe type person. No one wants that for a life partner. If you divorce her someone needs to point out to her she will never find another man like you. Someone should also tell her what she’s about to lose if she gets divorced. Please tell me you didn’t put your name on the mortgage or the house contract in Texas. I sure hope you can save your marriage and she has her knees, greed, changing at…
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 03:37 PM
1

Its about being loved for who you are. Love by animals is authentic. Glad you’re being loved.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 01:32 PM
8

Get a dog. No more lonely. A bit of work but much better at unconditional love every time you walk in the door. Tell the bitches to fuck off.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 03:58 AM
8

OP, time to be big and strong. Chop all branches off and let no monkey branching happen. I love it when women come to the reality of what they’ve lost. Congratulations on your victory. You are the poster child for men at the end of their crappy relationships. Well done. You are a hero.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 01:44 AM
2

OP, i admire your right and wrong social compass. It may work against you, but it’s still provides a good gauge for how to do things. The problem is not everyone else follows any kind of standard. This is a bit of a gray area. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/24 01:15 AM
2

Now the Poster child for men’s divorce life. For the W. Sir, I proudly celebrate you today!! Well done.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/24 02:17 PM
3

OP, you are correct this is wrong. Your soon to be ex-wife, has no moral compass and his bankrupt character. I would make sure all of her family knows that she’s doing this in the worst life possible. Take a screenshot and put it in an email and send it to everyone.
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/24 07:17 PM
1

There is no question. Divorce has taken the nicest people and turned them into evil monsters. Clearly, your ex-wife is in that category. The big question is why. Learning what the motivation is for her to be evil and have to win, and every battle may give you peace of mind. It seems to me somewhere along the way women have a mental imbalance in these situations turned very ugly. In this situation, the key is to figure out why and work towards a solution.
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/24 01:28 PM
2

Time to lawyer up, go back and get a court injunction and get your name off that line of credit and end it. Make a judge make her do it. She’s extremely selfish. Pretty much an evil person.
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/24 05:20 AM
8

I pray that you have a solid lawyer, that will defend you at all costs and fight for your rights. Hopefully she gets nothing.
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/24 04:28 AM
1

Correct. A shit burger with side of hot mess onions.
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/24 05:14 AM
2

Record everything. I really dislike women that do this to men. It’s all wishy-washy and gameplay. This reminds me of the song Maneater, women just eat men up and spit them out. Our crappy Legal system supports this philosophy. It’s total bullshit.
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/24 03:47 AM
6

OP, She is trying to guilt trip her way back in your life and go back to the way it was before AP. Now that you know she keeps AP on the hook, why bother? She cant make up her mind. Her weakness is unappealing, making it better for you to say, see ya later. I applaud your discipline. Be a great Dad. Take care of you and your children. Wishing you well. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/24 01:49 AM
2

OP, take care of you. Shift your priority off your back onto yourself go to the gym, eat, better foods, take care of yourself. Try to find a way to stop thinking about her. Focus on your well-being. Your mental health is more important than anything right now. Get yourself in a good place. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 02:14 PM
4

OP- dont beat yourself up over this stuff. Her true colors will be seen.
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/24 05:34 AM
2

Golf, fishing all consume hours. Focus on burning hours.
/r/Divorce_Men04/02/24 02:31 PM
4

She traded down and will soon have a big hot mess on her hands. Wishing you well
/r/Divorce_Men04/02/24 02:19 PM
9

OP, sorry to read this confusion by your wife. Mixed signals in communication is one of the highest points of discontent in marriages. This is leading to overall marriage breakdown. If it were me, I’d Set boundaries starting with respect. I hope you can get things going in a good direction.
/r/Divorce_Men04/02/24 01:24 PM
5

Are people so easily influenced, persuaded today that they cant stand on their own and make informed decisions? It seems they are. Being weak is such a turn off. When you cant stand and manage life it sux for everyone who comes in contact with that person. I speak from firsthand experience..
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/24 12:40 PM
2

Congrats. Good on your daughter for dropping the hammer on her mom. Focus on being the best dad possible. Stay away from the toxic ex and you’ll have a happy life.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/24 02:52 AM
5

OP, sorry you’re going through this awkward situation. She sounds like a class A manipulator who is tying you up in knots. I would not put up with it. This shit is very unhealthy. Protect yourself here. I would sit her down at the kitchen table, tell her the basis of your marriage is built on honesty and trust. then look her right in the eyes. ask her if she slept with anyone else in the last three years. Watch where her eyes go, if she looks left or right - she’s lying. If there’s anyway you ca…
/r/Divorce_Men01/02/24 03:48 AM
3

OP, good for you to stand up for yourself even with your own children. Clearly, your wife has poisoned their minds with false accounts of you to diminish their love for their father. There’s no other way to justify their behavior. I’m a big fan of gray rock, do the 180, no contact. If they pull their head out of their ass, they can come back to you. Until then go live your life and be a champion.
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/24 08:20 PM
1

OP, sorry to read about your situation and you’re feeling a bit down. In all sincerity. You have to stop beating yourself up. It takes two people putting 100% into a relationship for it to be successful. Even at this stage in your life it’s not too late. My number one advice would be to get out of the house. join some social clubs, practice, networking, or going to meet up learning new things get involved in things that might stretch yourself. volunteering is a great place to meet new people. yo…
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/24 08:13 PM
3

OP, sorry you’re going through this turmoil right now. No mayors deserves all this chaos. And no little girl, especially deserves to see her parents in arguments and disputes. If it were me, for the sake of the daughter and her health, I would separate. You can take time away to reset your mind and your mental health. I would focus on your daughter and yourself. try to mentally remove yourself from your spouse. I think it’ll help you get yourself back to normal. wishing you well in this situatio…
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 01:22 AM
1

I would give yourself a gut check on your sanity. How do you feel about being around her? If you dont breakout in sweats or shake or want to yak. Go for it, go meet new people. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 09:51 PM
6

Everybody loves a happy ending.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 09:39 PM
8

Because culture and our broken legal systems says “screw the guy over because men are bums.” What a joke.
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/24 07:28 AM
3

Luv this!
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/24 07:23 AM
14

I agree. If a women decides to end things and doesn’t want to work on a marriage or relationship, these will be the consequences. She chose this situation. She can dance with the monkeys at the circus.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/24 08:39 PM
1

Of the guys that I know that implemented gray rock, 180, no contact they found that to be very effective. Congrats to you.
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/24 02:12 PM
5

She knows she is running you down. That is her game. Dont give up. Find a new gear, shift into overdrive without ruining your engine (mental health). Be a fighter, Stand Tall in this storm. Its a persistence / perseverance test. You can do it.
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/24 05:23 PM
11

Evil women seem to draw karma to their space. Let’s Pray justice is found here which balances the scales of life for the world to be in harmony.
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/24 05:48 AM
2

Evil women seem to draw karma to their space. Let’s Pray that justice balances the scales of life for the world to be in harmony. Vengeance is the Lord’s.
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/24 05:47 AM
1

Protect you. Sorry to hear the sad news. It sounds bad.
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/24 09:29 PM
2

Her blame shifting will only hurt her view on relationships. Until then… pain, misalignment with accountability, responsibility. Lose her audience. Solo life.
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/24 09:15 PM
-1

It’s time to pull out your therapist information and share it with your family. Prove your ex is bat shit crazy. There’s no reason you should be treated like this it’s totally irresponsible. Specially, your own mother. Glad you got away from a really bad person who tried to lead a double life, 1. Nice/nice fooling people 2. Raging bull screaming at you, that’s just awful. Wishing you well in the next chapter of life. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/24 11:39 PM
1

OP, it sounds like you still wanna be married but your wife does not. If she has mental health issues, why not get her on some medication to help resolve all of the uncertainty in her mind and her life? This sounds like it’s going to be a lot of hard work for both of you. I’m a big fan of trying to save marriages rather than break them up. I wish both of you well in this adventure. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/24 07:27 PM
2

I would say no. Lawyer up for professional advice.
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/24 06:55 PM
4

I love it when men take control their situations and get away from abusive, loveless, sexless, evil women. We deserve so much better. After working hard being the provider and protector it’s only fair that men live get to live a good life. Congratulations are in order. Wishing you well. In my mind, I picture the image of the Phoenix rising from the ashes. That’s you, Mr. Phoenix., go to big things.
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/24 01:50 PM
3

OP, sorry to read about your marriage mess. I vote for mental health escape. This is a key step to a few things; 1. time and space away from the tyrant. She knows she can run you down. You’re weak today, you’ll be strong soon. 2. Prove you can be calm in a crisis. I guess is she enjoys tormenting you and when you react by getting upset, she enjoys knowing she can push her buttons. If you don’t feel comfortable having that conversation alone, bring a third-party. 3. She sounds like a toxic person…
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/24 01:13 PM
6

I would divide your finances right now so that you protect your assets. Lawyer up, follow their advice. Be sure to remind her what she’s about to lose in regards to support, finances, mobile phone, credit cards, insurance coverage on multiple things. All ending. She will be on her own. I didn’t see cheating mentioned on her part. Not sure what’s driving her away. Wishing you well as you work through this gut wrenching situation. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/24 06:39 PM
3

Absolutely. In fact I would say as soon as she gets engaged, you’re done. It’s all on the cheater guy. There is no reason you need any responsibility they both broke their vows and can have each other. That mess probably wont last either. Obviously have your lawyer review before and final submission. Hope it goes well for you. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/24 01:19 PM
6

Ask why a lot. Better be really really good answers about your magic wizzard skills; dancing fingers, wild tongue, powerful hips, rock solid body, etc. Otherwise, “Na, I’m good. You go do you. I found peace and quiet without your toxic vibes. Happy New Year.”
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/24 05:16 PM
6

OP, you are not the asshole. Your soon to be ex-wife, made some major decisions and did not consult you. That is disrespect. No man will put up with that disrespect. There’s nothing wrong with you seeking a better place and a better life away from all the chaos. I wish you well in the next chapter of life. Stay safe.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/24 05:34 PM
1

In this case, I would encourage you to consider the investment you’ve made in this situation. Separation is OK if you have a broader goal in mind. Saving a marriage takes a lot of work. Take some time apart and find and learn new things about yourself. I don’t think it will hurt anyone. If you go to counseling, open the lines of communication and try to save your marriage. I’ve heard hormone therapy works wonders for women. Maybe it can help your girl. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/24 06:43 PM
7

This chaps my shorts. Another example of our broken legal system. I don’t see women suffering like this ever. Nothing close to this kind of pain. Divorce is set up like a donkey circus to ruin men 90% of the time. What a fucking joke.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/24 04:04 PM
4

She is showing cheap slut character. All cheating needs consequences. They can be big or small but there needs to be a result. Tell AP and your kids, mommy is messed up in the head. I would document this WW history, monkey branching, disrespect and crash landing from affair fog story. I hope you get your part sorted out smoothly and you can remove yourself from this toxic woman. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/24 04:00 PM
7

OP, your comments/ venting is valid, you are correct She did all this. The key is how do you rebound and bounce back? Be resilient. You sound like a strong, high spirited individual. I hope you can turn the corner with mental health anguish and find a good spot in life. Wishing you well. Be safe out there.
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/24 02:33 PM
2

Why so insecure? Does she need affirmation? Does She needs to be #1 in everything? Its over the top. Unplug phone.
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/24 12:59 AM
8

This is a spectacular list 7 solid points. Proof that crazy bitches think like sociopaths, by making up shit to cause more and more chaos. These kind of people need a long walk off the short road. It’s terrible men have to work through this bullshit, the broken fucked up legal system caters to these people. All Hail to the guy who can overcome the system and find a few blueberries, (victories), in life, and still come out, standing on his own 2 feet.
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/24 01:41 AM
12

Congratulations on the victory for the men on earth today. In my cynical view of this shitty legal system that grinds men down to nothing. Your victory makes me so happy.
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/24 01:32 AM
3

I took over money management when my ding dong wife could not figure how to get us ahead in our savings. I earned $75k, she earned another $20.k I kept racking my brains wth is going on? We could never build up savings, get out of debt or improve our automobiles for years. Finally, I said I’ll take over. Something is not right here. We spend less than we earn, there should be a surplus. Is she stealing money. No. She was not good with managing money. Too much stress. I got this shit. I paid off …
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/24 01:07 AM
4

Good to hear you were Dad first, protecting your child. Very cool. Bad women being bad= stay away.
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/24 01:03 AM
5

I’ve heard crazy ass ex wives are better to be far away.
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/24 01:02 AM
1

OP, sorry you are wrestling with the mental part of D. I’m sure I would be in the same space. If you can let go of her free rent in your mind, you may be moving on sooner. Distract yourself with work projects, get a dog, volunteer at the animal shelter a couple times a week. Pick up a new hobby. I wish you well in your recovery and new chapter in life.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/24 05:05 AM
3

Hire a jaws-like lawyer to chew her up. She is a liar, deceiver, despicable person for besmirching your character. Truly sounds like an awful person.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/24 09:53 PM
2

Sounds like your stbxw family has too many obstacles to overcome for you to be successful. Take what you need. Stay away from bad actors, it only brings down the whole team. Focus on being a great Dad. Take care of yourself. Wishing you and your daughter well in the new year. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/24 01:37 PM
1

If it were me, I would wait. Because you don’t know if your wife has hired somebody to track your behavior and use it against you in divorce court. If I were you, I’d go smash once or twice and then tell him you need to wait until your divorce is over.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/24 08:03 PM
2

From my experience. Women like this ruin society.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/24 03:45 AM
1

Every mans nightmare and every mans dream.
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/24 04:50 AM
2

Good take here. I agree. I want her to give 100% but she is lazy. Shows no effort. If we dont lead then nothing will get done.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 04:41 AM
3

I agree. Men dont have the same women chatty kathy groups to share the shit in life. This group serves a great purpose. I see it as a place to Help men in tough times with ideas, advice, ways to cope. Carry on.
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/24 04:07 PM
3

The most difficult part is how, why women dont get it. If she is having her cycle, OK, we get it, we can do other things. Don’t abandon your spouse when they need you. By missing this critical connection, women lose in the marriage. The judicial system fucks men over, so they go find release else where. A truly vicious round and round.
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/24 04:01 PM
3

Your stbxw is trying to manipulate you with false promise. Good on you to say,” FO. Your fired.” Go find a real woman who knows what she is doing.
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/24 02:56 PM
2

Glad to hear you escaped unscathed. Good to get out early and skip the nuclear explosion. Cut all strings and sail on.
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/24 12:31 AM
10

Relate? Its the same shitty life for most miserable married men out there. Men could fuck everyday. Women dont give a shit. The vicious cycle goes on through the ages. Most big shot men with money go find escorts to unload the weapon. If you find a loving woman who truly understands the assignment of a wife, consider yourself unusually fortunate, blessed beyond measure. The rest of us, married life - is hard life.
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/24 12:24 AM
8

Stay out of the taco truck. It will ruin you. No blowing out her back. Think of how miserable you will feel if you give in again. Think about Nancy Regan, just say no. That should do it. Stay strong. Be safe. We’re all pulling for you. You can do it.
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/23 03:52 AM
3

This is a great question for a marriage management session either you do it together or with a 3rd party/counselor. For you it sounds like your ok with her success but not her priorities (putting work over you, your marriage, other things). Her position seems to be her self-worth is higher than her current situation. Whether that’s marriage, work, living conditions, financial status, whatever it may be. Does she have issue with earning more than you or she OK with it and won’t hold it over your …
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/23 11:08 PM
3

Or The cheater
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/23 08:26 PM
2

I really like STBXW.
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/23 08:26 PM
1

The best part is bros helping bros.
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/23 03:01 PM
2

I like this post. Agree on Grayrock. I have seen it work to pull heads out of assess, clear affair fog and point out what cheater will lose.
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/23 10:02 PM
3

Congrats on her realization the grass is not always greener, taste better, smells better. You’ve been fooled. Making you a ______.
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/23 09:58 PM
0

Pearl is a lovely woman. She tries to help men in these dire times. Nice video.
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/23 07:38 PM
9

OP sorry you’re going through this difficult time. I find it incredibly painful when women lie about who the father of children are, especially when they know the truth. My heart goes out to you for the crushing recognition of the paternity test results. I’m sure that was very difficult. in review of your scenario, I ask myself what do I want now? You could let her file for divorce without you involved that might not go well. Or you can get a low rent, lawyer or even try mediation to wrap up the…
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/23 05:14 PM
16

OP, sorry you are going through this difficult time. Your stbxw, is deep in affair fog. From my experience, when a woman behaves like this, she has emotionally detached from her man at least 2 to 3 months before this event happened. She’s doing damage control now telling others it’s been a long time coming and has blindsided you. I know you’re upset, angry and confused by her behavior. It won’t do you any good to rant and rave. Start getting the truth out to family and friends that your wife has…
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/23 05:50 AM
1

Stay in house for the rest of school year. Stable for kids. Set a goal to be in a new rented place by July1. Go from there.
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/23 05:41 AM
0

Do not leave your home. It usually works against the men. Get a good lawyer, follow their advice. Video all interactions w/ stbxw. Broken trust. Do you suspect her seeing another guy. Her behavior is ripe for a co worker cheat code. Start taking her off as a beneficiary on all things, healthcare plan, auto insurance, retirement, investments, split bank accounts asap. Open new for you.
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/23 05:34 AM
1

JBR for the Win!!
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/23 05:22 AM
1

Everyone loves an underdog success story. Glad you are doing well. Keep fighting for you. Stand tall and if they disrespect you, fuck ‘em. Keep rolling. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/23 05:10 AM
1

OP, it sounds like you still love her, but she chose this other bumbling idiot to be her current boyfriend. You’ve been dragging your feet on the annulment with the idea that you can get back together. I think you need to let go and move on.
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/23 04:35 AM
16

OP, you need to be big and strong here. Do not move out of your house. She is the risk person in this story. A judge will see she is a hot mess. Protect you and your child. She has a history of self abuse, alcohol. If anyone’s leaving, it should be her. Your lawyer needs to step up, do a better job to protect you and your child. Stay with your child, be a great Dad. Do not move out. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/23 02:14 AM
11

January is the biggest month for filing for divorce. You are not alone in this marriage mess these days.
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/23 02:10 AM
1

Go to wedding place to file for divorce. Dump and run.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/23 03:24 PM
2

Tell everyone about this bullshit behavior. Request no one provide her your new address. Keep up the good work on grayrock, ignore hard. You are winning.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/23 07:51 AM
3

I would close all joint accounts. Move your payroll checks to a new account/ bank. You coukd share a story about your relative in forensic accounting and the lessons learned in divorce cases. Then say “ is there anything you want to tell me before I hire him to help with our divorce finances?” Stay safe.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/23 07:47 AM
5

I’d say she F’d herself.
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/23 02:34 AM
7

OP, women tend to move on faster than men in these situations. If it were me, I would cut the cord. I would go gray rock, and do the 180 and ignore her. Only interact in the case of children. You’ll be better off mentally if you distance yourself from her behavior. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/23 12:00 AM
2

Sir, she is abusing you mentally. You need her to stop right away. I would go grayrock, do the 180/ignore her hard. It’s important for you to know that self-worth and self-esteem are not tied to her or her comments. She’s breaking you down on purpose to make herself look good. She may have mental health issues. But, I’m sure will never admit it. I would suggest taking some time away from her so that you can heal and pull yourself together. When a man is disrespected to the level you described yo…
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/23 07:29 PM
2

I call it abandonment. Women withholding intimacy /love dont study and learn their husbands. Show lazy trait. Selfish. Grounds for leaving.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/23 07:53 PM
1

I’m hearing a plea for help. I’m reading comments about folks reaching out. This seems to be a dilemma. Why not find someone to contact and start the dialogue. Ask for help. Talk it out. Don’t be ignorant. Open the door.
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/23 08:26 AM
2

OP, never do this alone. It can easily blow up in your face and make you look like the bad person. Lawyer up, counselor advice only. No ceral box advice allowed.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/23 04:22 AM
1

I would ask her to move out of your master bedroom. Reminder her what she is losing, insurance coverage, any semblance of retirement, a decent husband, cut off finances, vacations.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/23 04:11 AM
4

OP, my heart literally breaks for you in this terrible sexless, loveless marriage. You sound like a good guy who’s in a bad situation. The key is it’s a short term wayside stop. I would go to the bank divide money, go to your financial planner, take her name off as a beneficiary on everything, take her of medical, dental benefits and start working on your exit strategy. Lawyer up. Talk to your parents about your plan. If you have any brothers and sisters, keep them up-to-date. And then do the gr…
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 03:07 AM
1

If it were me, and I greatly enjoy this exercise, smashing is smashing. Like riding a bike, once you know, you know. Go enjoy yourself. Ride on.
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/23 12:42 AM
6

Op, she is working you and you need it to stop. It seems she will run out of funds at some point, yes? Go find a friend who knows a lawyer who you can talk to for free, recent law school grad or retired divorce lawyer. Find a no cost solution. It is there.
/r/Divorce_Men30/11/23 03:30 AM
3

Hit record now.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/23 07:53 PM
2

Sir, broken relationships are difficult. Divorce is very difficult. Not here to judge you. You had some interesting points and I’d like to comment on those. Love is not a feeling it needs to come from inside you and be shared towards another person. When you say you can’t love someone unless they love you that sounds conditional. the best type of love is, we’re both parties meet at the same time and they both give towards their partner. I’m sure you’ve been traumatized by some things in the past…
/r/Divorce_Men11/11/23 12:12 AM
15

There are many device options yet its not worth getting caught tracking. Wearing a disguise and following is also a bust. Spending money on someone tracking may or may not payoff. Lawyer up. I’m a big fan of men going gray rock, do the 180, no contact, ignore hard. My hope is she’ll get the hint pack her stuff and get the fuck out. Then you’ll be free.
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/23 02:05 AM
6

Get your Dobber up and get going. No more down in the dumps.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/23 07:43 PM
1

I admire your resiliency to make it work awhile. Women that are lazy and dont try are no fun. Sometimes sticking it out due to abandonment will not work.
/r/Divorce_Men06/10/23 04:52 PM
4

OP, sorry you are going through this right now. Do you feel like she has someone else on her radar? Instead of giving up, is there anyway she would work with you to resolve any issues? I have a buddy who has two kids with autism and he is deciding if he wants to stay in working out or if he’s gonna leave them all‘s life. It’s a very difficult decision. Too many people are throwing in the towel early without trying to fix things and make it better. hoping you can save your marriage. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/23 06:11 PM
3

OP sorry you’re going through this. You didn’t do anything wrong. Putting all the blame on the two people who broke your marriage. Make sure you get the right narrative out to the audience so they understand the truth. Wishing you well in the next chapter of life. Hoping to find a good woman to love you for who you are. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/23 10:22 PM
1

Record it. Hide phone. Get her talking. Ask about the orgasms. Was it fun putting you face in her kitty. Once when I was dreaming it was you and your friend and me and we were naked… Then go see a lawyer
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/23 04:11 AM
2

Can you find a group of friends to go visit the guy and help him point his affections to another woman? A little convincing to have him shift his priorities away from a married woman.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/23 12:20 AM
1

OP, sorry to read your sad story. She seems harsh. Wow, the comments by her about the marriage seem to show as narcissistic in some way. Any other cold calculating behaviors? What a cruel thing to say to a spouse who provided for her and her children. Seems to be disconnected badly. When making love, does she just sit there and take it or did she show any emotion and enjoy the sexual experiences? She may have a very hard time expressing love. It seems very strange. How about her mother’s persona…
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/23 12:05 PM
3

OP, sorry to read your story of WW and typical railroad kangaroo divorce court. Congrats on your big WIN. The divorce court system is so flawed against men, it is broken badly, women get away with too much material possessions in broken marriages. Even when they cheat. Typically they get the house, 50% of money, cars, retirement and the poor guy rarely sees his children. Women move on to the next stiff who fills their box. Our society is messed up. I am happy for you to get peace of mind and com…
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/23 11:48 AM
2

Dogs have emotional connection to humans and can bridge gap. They are great companion to replace human who left you hanging.
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/23 07:01 PM
1

Get your lawyer, working harder for you to solve this negative problem. Ask to pay out a lump sum to this donk person. End the misery.
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/23 06:27 PM
1

Agreed. The mindset is difficult to understand. The Mystery of women.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/23 03:18 PM
1

OP, sorry you’re going through this difficult time. Is there any chance you can track her to see if she’s giving her affection to another person, man, or. For whatever reason, women have the ability to be incredibly deceptive, sneaky about their betrayal and cheating. I would do your due diligence to learn more before you make any decisions. if she’s on faithful start the divorce process immediately. If she’s been faithful, tell her it’s just not working out, she’s not meeting your needs. And it…
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/23 05:04 AM
1

Get good lawyer. Do exactly what the say. Find out if you can transfer ownership of properties and assets to your parents or your brothers and sisters to get it out of your name. Change ownership and put it in your will that you’re gifting it to them. This is what the multi million dollar soccer player dead and it’s saved his bacon. Not sure how it works in the United States. I’m a big proponent of the US legal system is broken, flawed, ruins healthy, happy men, it’s so biased against men, we ge…
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/23 04:53 AM
1

I paid $125 for 90min. Consult. Learning I would be screwed losing 50% of everything. The legal system is so fucking broken and biased against men. Why get married, why get divorced? I gave up. The whole thing is a joke. If I ignore her long enough, maybe she’ll just go away. Grayrock/180/nc. Get out.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/23 04:37 AM
1

OP, sorry you’re going through this difficult time. Is there any chance she’s feeling around with another guy or another person? Can you track her or trail her and see what she does during the day or after work on weekends? As you learn more you might be surprised by what you find. I would anticipate, and worst case scenario, this might be where you end the marriage and go your own way. What does your new life look like without her. You might find yourself or satisfied with the new you.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/23 04:09 AM
1

Or just be gone. Go away for a few hours. How about a movie, the new tom cruise flying over a mountain on a motorcycle. Anyway, skip her visit, say bugger off.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/23 03:41 AM
5

I know what you mean. They cheat and are instantly dirty. Never look at her the same. She is tainted.
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/23 03:02 AM
12

OP, sorry your situation ended in a split up. Like so many cheating women, they never quite seem to be able to confess and feel bad about it. It’s truly a remarkable attitude. She crushed my soul and shrugs, oh well. Good on you to kick her out and let her know you won’t tolerate disrespect. She’ll have time to think about her catastrophic mistakes and probably resort to begging to reconnect with you. I encourage you to hold your ground. Once a cheater always a cheater, never trust that person a…
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/23 02:38 AM
2

Its not ok but you need to stay cool and not do anything to escalate the potential conflict. Yes, she is gutter surfing, trading down, much lower than you. If it were me, I would focus on being the best dad to my kids possible. Make sure the guy doesn’t do any damage to your children. I would grey rock her do the 180 and ignore her with anything outside the kids. Be the grown-up in this shitty situation. Wishing you well as you navigate your life moving forward. Stay safe.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/23 12:28 PM
1

OP, sorry you were going through this time of difficulty. Your soon to be ex-wife sounds very challenging both mentally and emotionally. In the situation I’m convinced somebody knows some thing. You just have to find somebody that leads you to where she’s hiding or hanging out. Create a false narrative that says you have a reason to speak with her and you need someone to lead you to her so you can share this important news. Hopefully you’ll find a cooperating party. Stay safe.
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/23 10:34 PM
2

I could not stand for this stuff. OP, sorry to read this story. I encourage you to stand strong. No more doormat. Time to take a tactical leadership position. Protect you and yours. Take half of your money immediately to safe stash. She is leaving with 2 boys soon. No more marriage bedroom, she is out. Can this be fixed, yes, is it likely, no. These wack-ass people manipulated her mind, she let them in. You need to manage the fake story. Write up and publish these 31+€#’s, expose their fraud. th…
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/23 08:12 PM
2

I say nfw. Stay in your home. It sounds like a great place. She can leave. I have other divorce friends, who have said to leave there, Merrideth Home because the judge friends on that one husband leaves the family home. Just my opinion.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/23 01:35 PM
6

This is not true. Sex is a beautiful thing between 2 people making a dynamic connection.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/23 12:50 PM
9

What I really like in the Kevin Costner saga is how his first wife rakked him over the coals and took millions out of his pocket. He vowed never to let that happen again. Congrats on getting this lady to sign a prenup to protect his earned wealth. It looks like he will pay her 1.5m a year. His net worth is between 250- 300m for a 30 yr hollywood career.
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/23 04:32 PM
15

I agree with you. The legal system is broken. It’s screws men over to lose 50% of everything they’ve earned and worked for their entire lives. It’s not equitable or fair. It would be great if a really smart person could figure out how to balance the scales of divorce so that it’s equal for both dissatisfied parties. There’s no reason a man should have to pay two payments, one for spousal support and one for children. That’s BS.
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/23 04:28 PM
1

I’ve had both pets. I am convinced a dog makes a better connection to me, emotionally than a cat. I would disagree with your assessment and focus on being a dog owner instead.
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/23 12:20 PM
7

OP, sorry you were going through this emotional train wreck right now. Is there any chance she’s fooling around with another guy? The way she approached you and her language in her whole attitude just hints she’s seeing someone else. Let us know when you have a chance. I applaud you for your civil behavior in a difficult situation. I agree with taking down pictures and removing Mementos only remind you of the previous life. I think you’ll be fine moving on and finding another woman that will lov…
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/23 09:27 PM
1

Go, P, you need to realize this was a chapter in your life. It does not define who you are or what happened. Ruined your view on life. Sounds like she was insecure and needs a lot of audition. You need to prove to the world that you can survive without her and that you’re a better person after leaving. Go live the next chapter as your best life. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/23 01:55 AM
2

Steakmeister, I agree with you. This big of a change is probably going to be hard to accept. However, you’re clinging to a memory that was short-lived, and will not be re-created again in this lifetime. Unfortunately, you need to let go of the past life. I wish you the best in the future, finding the new you to be a better person then you were with your ex. Go live the big dog life.
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/23 01:52 AM
1

OP, sorry to read this. Any chance she is with another guy. Go see lawyer, follow their direction. Do divorce homework, learn options. Separate money quickly. Get your half now. Maybe reach out to stbxw in-laws and say, um, what’s up with daughter/wife, where she be? What has she said? Learn more. No need to say or do stuff that could hurt you in court, with a judge, lawyers. I vote no scorched earth until later. Wishing you well in this situation. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/23 04:45 AM
6

Stonewalling is used to avoid guilt and never accept they did something wrong. No greater bullshit has been shoveled.
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/23 09:29 PM
7

Record everything coming out of her mouth. Tell your lawyer she is a narcissist and has broken the court orders multiple times, citing examples 1,2,3. Document ding bat ExW unstable behavior. She may dig her own hole on this one. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/23 09:15 AM
13

A nice summary of the women in many of my divorced friends lives. I see a bigger issue: the Fall-Out. These women get wrapped up in the affair fog, fake fantasy life, they miss the nuke explosion which will happen when they’re caught. They miss the painful consequences of betrayal, lying, deception and cheating. Most men invest their life to build a solid marriage. This ruins that plan in an instant leading to a meltdown. It should frighten women. Women lose a lot of security. No more joint bank…
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/23 08:50 AM
5

I would file that idea in the circle bin. Dont do it. More importantly, forgive yourself, confess to God, turn and flee from the lust. If needed, Confess to a church leader, hit your knees and repent like your wife and family mean the world to you. The new you can make your wife and children a top priority. Live the good life. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/23 08:04 PM
1

Oh, Pete, sorry you’re going through this terrible time. Your wife is deep in the affair. Fuck. Be sure to go. No contact and gray rocker, ignore hard. Focus on your son and yourself and being the best dad possible. find out if AP is married. If he is, go sit down with his wife and spill the tea, explain everything. 2. Go see lawyer about divorce and lawsuit. Contact her companies HR department and tell them you’re going to threaten a lawsuit, to sue them for co workers fucking and breaking up y…
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/23 03:18 AM
2

Time for a better lawyer to fight you XW crazy bullshit behavior. X is a master manipulating 403. No man should have this batshit crazy lady around you.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/23 05:29 AM
1

Nope. It only adds confusion to a young child. I would wait.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/23 12:11 AM
4

I love this plan. Hammer time.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/23 11:34 PM
6

Sounds like she was happy having someone else do all the work. You carried her water and now she has to do it, she may find life gets harder as a solo person. Congrats on your escape. Move on like a big dog. Be a great dad, and the best person you can be. Wishing you success in the next chapter. Stay safe.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/23 08:54 PM
13

A Hard no to hang in there. That is the problem. We need the legal system changed to adequately defend men from these gold digger situations. I know so many men getting ass fucked due to outdated, antiquated and misguided divorce laws across our country (usa). Who has found a way to win at this crappy game?
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/23 05:50 PM
5

Women that treat men with a high level of disrespect are no good. Tell us about her relationship with her dad or her brother. Good on you for being patient and bad on you for putting up with his bullshit. I dont trust her and she needs to move out. You’ll have a plan to start a new life and a new chapter without her. Turn that page and go be the best person you can be. Stay safe.
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/23 05:47 PM
1

OP, sorry to read this. Sucky marriages are common. Unfortunately the wife just needs security, safe place and a wimpy guy who wont leave or rock the boat. Time to get wet, jump out and swim to shore it’s only 50 feet to shore. Get out of those wet clothes, get happy, and get ready to start a new life. She can stay in the boat and be miserable by herself. There’s no reason for you to stay in a miserable marriage, and be unhappy the rest your life. That’s not it was it was it was intended for. Sh…
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/23 05:26 PM
1

She is master class level manipulator. Curious about her mom. I would tell the Dad. Update your friends and family. She has far too much control and needs to be put in her place. Stand up for yourself and sit this 403 down for a last chance talk. Either you are in this with me or you aint. Decide by Saturday or you move out. Remind her, no healthcare, auto, home, life insurance, all your safety nets go away. No retirement, pension, trips to the beach, all gone. You as the man deserve better. Be …
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/23 03:05 AM
6

She’s a rug sweeper. I would publish the truth to all key stakeholders across family and friends. Everyone needs to know her real colors. Go Greyrock, 180 degree, no contact. Ignore hard.
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/23 03:47 AM
2

Ooo, you have to go now that you told us about it. We all want to know if this leads to booty call of duty.
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/23 03:37 AM
6

The mods on surviving infidelity are raging assholes. I read a story about a woman cheating and went to comment, and because I said the woman cheated they deleted due to sexism. What the fuck?
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/23 03:35 AM
1

Sure for 1 month then all bets are null and void.
/r/Divorce_Men10/08/23 03:41 AM
1

It’s people like this why we can’t have nice things. Pure evil. Selfish beyond measure. Immature. I wonder if her parents know how their child turned out? What a sad story.
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/23 04:38 PM
2

He needs to invest some money in hiring a bunch of dudes to start dating her or finding her on dating websites. Get a guy to like her, start trying to get her married off so she’s out of your boyfriends pocketbook. Wacky stuff. Any woman that makes false accusations and files frivolous lawsuits has no moral character. She’s a wanker.
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/23 03:14 AM
16

OP, sorry your stbxw is an arrogant selfish immature child. Her opinions on your feelings can FO. You should definitely feel betrayed, lied to, deceived and cheated. As her sexual world changed, she could have easily communicated her new/ changing desires with proper respect. By not doing that - she is a wanker, 403, @1+€#. Selfish little girl with no moral character. Your healing can begin by getting time and space away from her. My hope is you go greyrock, do a full 180, no contact. Ignore har…
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/23 05:03 AM
1

Your talking about a fundamental baptist church that is hard-lined rules focused, in the christian community that is called heavy handed Legalism. The best defense, for that is the New Testament, which speaks of grace, Jesus grace. You need to ask her about that and about Christ shed blood on the cross. If she knows her position in Christ, she will not embrace legalism, but instead, embrace Grace. If she chooses the church over you, you can file for divorce and claim spiritual abuse. I hope this…
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/23 12:38 PM
10

Depends on the scenario. If her ex was abusing her, I’d give her credit for escaping by divorce. If She’s a narcissist, bitch and feminist I probably wouldn’t date her. All things being equal I need to get to know the person better, learn about her interests, passions. if everything checks out, all systems go.
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/23 11:59 AM
11

OP, you are wanting something that is gone. She fell to her vows and commitment to you, your family your friends, her family. She is lost to the streets. Let go. You need to do Greyrock, do the full 180 and no contact. Cut her out. No more insurance, no retirement, no more family, its gone. She burned the bridge. Gone gone gone. Stop hoping on gone. Go live your new life. You got this. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/23 04:59 AM
1

OP, women that cant say no, defend their marriage from others, dont hold their vows in the highest regard, protect their purity only for their husband are no one you want to live with and share a worthy life. I am happy for your escape. It will take time for you to cut the emotional and mental court. Still connecting you to a person who shared a life with. With time and space growing on your behalf. It’s almost like planting crops in the ground. It will start to get better and better. Wishing yo…
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/23 12:21 PM
1

If I heard that shit talk, I would go to my grave never ever uttering those words to anyone. For some reason, the women have this strange sense of overvalued self-worth. Moving on.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/23 12:10 PM
1

I would record these episodes either audio or video for reference to share with a lawyer. Is she on any meds? Please tell us you have no children. If for better or worse means BPD then you could stay. If she is abusing you, then consider leaving. Get a 3rd party involved, counselor, pastor, friend. A neutral party who can help. Not social services, they would screw it up and blame you. I hope you can find common ground and live a healthy life.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/23 11:50 AM
1

Congrats on extracting the parasite from under your mud flaps. Once you pull them out, toss away, you begin to feel better.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/23 07:33 PM
1

Dont marry. Just smash.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/23 07:28 PM
2

This is one of those heavy duty double standards. I say we don’t give a flying fuck. She clearly found someone else to shake very quickly and us onto her next conquest. You take care of yourself and do what you want to do. She can go pass her judgment on someone else. Be safe and go live your best life.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/23 03:30 AM
2

Damn OP. Her parents are bad news. You gotta get some safe space away from these folks. They are running you down, dragging on you. Not good. Stay in school. Med school is a big accomplishment. You are so close. Finish it for your self worth. You earned. No one gave you anything. Be the Man. You have to ask yourself some questions, if I stay, can we reconcile and make it work? If I leave when we divide up assets will she take my monies? Protect yourself, your assets.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/23 03:28 AM
3

I suggest clean shaven look for judge and court appearance. Go get some nice matching shoes. Wear them once, take them back. Go Looking good, feeling good, showing up good. Go be good to yourself. Win the day!!! I hope it goes well for you. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/23 01:34 AM
2

OP, sorry you and your wife are ending things. I would change your language. Its not your fault the marriage ended. Its also not a failure. People change and some cant live up to the vows. Marriages end all the time. Dont be so hard on yourself. Let go. As far as the new lady, the timing to build new friendships is different for everyone. Maybe you’re ready right now and that’s OK. Weiss, friendship. Glad to hear you’re having a great connection stations. Sounds like it’s going well. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/23 01:20 AM
1

Please edit your post and provide a bit more information so we can help this boring german.
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/23 12:59 AM
2

Never.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/23 07:43 PM
1

OP, sorry to see you go through this terrible cheating situation. I agree with your friend and I would follow their advice to a point where you’re comfortable. Don’t do anything dramatic or yell and scream to paint you in a bad light. I really like the idea of asking her to leave or move out for sure she has to leave the master bedroom. Wishing you well in this situation. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/23 11:39 PM
2

Matt 6:31-32 clearly says, in the case of adultery, divorce is ok.
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/23 05:50 PM
8

I would bounce out if you are being disrespected. To me that is a big deal. One of the top areas for men is respect from your family, when that goes the end is near. Stand up for yourself. Do not let her treat you this way. Mother of children or not. You provide and protect, keep them safe and secure. There must be consequences.
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/23 08:14 PM
25

I would skip the games and publish the context of the affair to family and friends, so they know what happened from your perspective. I love the fact that your going hard line and saying screw the marriage- you cheated-> you got caught-> its over. OP, Congratulations on taking a strong stance. Your self respect will thank you later. This is what happens when people do bad things and there are consequences. Fuck around and find out. You could go gray rock, do the 180/no contact and go live your b…
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/23 08:06 PM
3

I have friends who have been through this. It’s all talk until they take action. Beware of someone pulling the strings behind the curtain. Find out who she’s getting advice from and head this off at the pass.
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/23 12:30 PM
2

This is a harsh realization for us to understand. If there is cheating by the wife, yes, they tossed their husband aside for a fling, a fantasy with some guy/girl for a fleeting moment. They never think about the crushing/ explosive consequences. Which are, you broke your marriage. You broke your family. It probably cant be fixed. Someone will be emotionally scarred by this event. If there are children, its even worse. The level of selfishness is unprecedented. I like to read about men that can …
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/23 12:20 PM
1

What are you a psychologist?
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/23 11:53 AM
22

I agree about women sabotaging their friends to add more woe to the group of hens. This reminds me a story my grandfather once told me, he went crab hunting, when you catch crabs, put in a bucket, one figures out how to escape gets all the way to the top and all the other crabs reach up an pull that one back in again. They don’t want anyone to escape the shit hole. That’s how I feel about these type of women today.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/23 07:04 PM
9

OP, that is a bit frightening. I applaud you for anticipating potential conflict. Is there anyway you can get your lawyer or the judge to alert law-enforcement to have some restraining order on your soon to be ex W to stay away from your family for at least one year? Stay safe
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/23 07:49 PM
1

OP, sorry you were in the situation. My sense is you’re in an abusive relationship. The abuse is mental or psychological warfare. And she is winning right now. For your own well-being, I recommend you find a way to escape or hit the eject button that says her far away with a parachute. I would go see a lawyer and find out what your options are start to divide up your finances think about taking her name off as a beneficiary at all important, legal documents communicate with your family and frien…
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/23 06:25 PM
6

OP, sorry for your current status. I know it sucks. You’re still a good guy, focus on you. Ignore her, go Grayrock. You did nothing wrong. She is the cheater. She broke the marriage. Get that storyline out to family and friends. People should know she was a 403. Whats tough to understand is why people do it, why cheat. Just be honest, end the marriage like a grown up. Break up and be truthful. Nope. Cheaters, liars, deceivers never learn. Bounce back big and strong. That will prove you were the …
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/23 12:24 PM
1

Work on better communication.. Its time to man up and talk about expectations for her. Move her out of the master bedroom unless she stops her crazy behavior. Consider greyrock, ignore her place on earth. She can fend for herself. Std test for you too. Is she shagging someone else? Stay safe.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/23 09:31 PM
2

OP, I feel terrible for you. This sounds like a slave master situation, where you’re at the master and slave at the same time. She better be really really good in bed. This is not an equally balanced relationship. Therefore, I recommend you put her off to the side of the road and keep on moving. she’s lazy and sloppy and knows that you to everything. If you’re not getting therapy, your therapist will tell you to start making her carrier weight. Take care of your children and yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/23 01:58 PM
1

Get smashing
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/23 05:24 AM
1

OP, my brother, you got a hold a line. You’re making this harder on yourself. No more caving in. Just because smashing his phone doesn’t mean you should be doing it with your ex. Just say no. Walk away. Run away if you have to. Stay strong, big dog you can do it.
/r/Divorce_Men19/07/23 04:24 AM
1

You my friend are the rock star Dad, ex Hubby of Reddit. Never read a better story of fuck you to a cheating partner. Well done and mucho grande, may more good stuff come your way. Is he dating a former Penthouse Pet of the Year too? Keep rolling up the good vibes now that the boat anchor is cut out of your life. Take care.
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/23 10:20 PM
1

OP, sorry this deam is ending. Take care of you and your children. Time for Greyrock, do the 180 and go NC. She is only going to rip your heart out more and more. Cut the cord. Move on. She is only going with this work fool because it makes her feel good. Unless… he is the homewrecker? I wish you well in the next few months as you work on your new life. Stay safe.
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/23 03:47 PM
2

I was just goofing. Hoping she can see the light, understand she made a major mistake filing papers and find you as her best option for a life partner. Reunited living for each other.
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/23 09:16 PM
1

You could try, Pull her ponytail and slap her rear end. Then Tell her to call you Mr. Man.
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/23 08:17 PM
1

The counselor sucked. Will wifey change her tune and coming running back if her world blows up with divorce papers by you?
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/23 10:37 PM
2

OP, sorry to read about this crappy situation. Couple quick questions, How many children? What ages? If young, fight for marriage. If older, let your stbxw go smash new guy. You are right she is sneaking around. Counselor had the punt blocked. Ruined play. You’re on your own 15yrd line, back against the wall. Do you feel like payton manning or ryan leaf? I wish you well in this situation hoping for a good outcome for you.
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/23 05:30 PM
0

OP, sorry you are going through this wacky situation. I can see how this could be a legal mess. It depends on how much you want to rage against the machine, the wife, the clinic, etc. Of course the clinic will support the wife. Men are dogs, just seed spillers. (sarcasm) not truth. I would hire a PR friend to write content for your counter story. Publish on Reddit. Tell everyone about the ex and her plan to crush you with your baby dispite being divorced. Who does that shit? Tell her family, you…
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/23 11:46 AM
4

OP, sorry, your wife has been making bad decisions and decided to blow up your family. I’ve never been a fan of men having to do the pick me dance or begging for their wayward wife to come back. I rather see marriages that can stand some turmoil, still come out together in the end. however, your wife sounds like she’s lost to the streets. Men that make an effort to improve your marriage or relationship. It seems better to end it and move on without her. Wishing you well in the next chapter of li…
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/23 04:51 AM
3

I read some of the story and my take is he was manipulating this surfer girl to his advantage. Trying to set boundaries but it really sounded like he was trying to control her. I see him as the douche bag here. The girl seems pretty normal. He seems like a control freak. With self-esteem issues.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/23 10:23 PM
5

You should try to save your marriage and you could even do it with research and you’re own counseling. Find some good things to work through online and solve your own problems before getting a divorce. It might make sense to have a short separation of like a month apart or she hast to do some reflection and you do too and then you come back together and discuss it. I hope this works out well for both of you. Stay safe.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/23 12:38 PM
2

OP, sorry you are in a sad marriage with a wife that is not giving 100% love you deserve. No man should have to go through what you have endured. It is wrong. I’m very impressed by your self awareness and analysis of the situation. I think you can save your marriage through intensive counseling. Your wife would have to agree to make some more 180° changes and you might have to make some changes on your end. A significantly improved level of communication would help you guys a great deal. Reading…
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/23 12:20 PM
2

I like the save enough money to move out part. Getting time and space away from toxic females is a huge win for most men. When she becomes crazy, it is best to get going, stay safe, get mental health back in line with reality. Unfortunately some men dont have the resources to escape. Good on you.
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/23 11:42 AM
3

She is working you. She knows she has control. We need to break the cycle. Think about it. She knows you want her to take them, therefore she declines, you react, blow a gasket, she wins. Better start to unbuckle from her soon, or you’ll be going to mental health counselor soon. Every psychologist is going to tell you to learn to let it go. Save yourself $5000. Just start to let go now. Stay safe.
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/23 04:32 AM
1

You need to unbuckle any other connections you have with her and get away. Have you contacted a lawyer yet?
/r/Divorce_Men06/07/23 02:39 AM
1

OP. Sorry this woman is treating you and your daughter poorly. First and foremost, you’re being a great dad. Hold your head high and know that your daughter is getting one great parent right now. Secondly, it only makes sense to get away from your toxic soon to be ex-wife because she’s dangerous and you don’t want that around your children. Third, start separating finances and getting ready for exit. Bottom line, I wish you well in your escape from this toxic situation. Stay safe for you and you…
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/23 10:58 PM
2

I refuse to fall on the sword here. I would flip the script and say if she’s that unhappy it’s her responsibility to come and talk to me about it. If she can’t communicate her needs her issues and there are problems, we can only do so much. Because we don’t know what’s going on in their head. As we’ve all learned, we’re not fucking mind readers, and they play more mental games in their own head then they do in real life. It’s literally a Rubiks cube to try to figure them out. This is not easy. I…
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/23 06:24 PM
1

I would simplify the prenup as much as possible or a barrier for her to move forward. Discuss Her concerns and what are your concerns, work it out. go get hitched then enjoy smashing on your honeymoon.
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/23 10:01 PM
3

Consult with your lawyer. Did you sign any papers to agree to this payment. Did she make you sign some thing under duress? Did you get your drunk or high or use sex to manipulate you? Just say no.
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/23 12:39 PM
1

Is there any chance you care that she is bipolar? Try to get 100% custody of your son and run away fast.
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/23 12:24 PM
3

OP, it sounds bad what she did to you. She is either a narcissist or a sociopath. The no emotion leads me to think she may have mental health or someone is drugging her to behave this way. I would take a day off of work and follow her around. See what she acts like on a given day. Its too strange to be normal. Protect your son and yourself. She might be hanging out with unsavory folks. She may get her face washed come back from the cheating fog and beg to be taken back. Beware Bizzare behaviors.…
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/23 04:28 AM
1

OP, sorry you’re going through this right now. Like many women, your wife is lost in her own mind. Not seeing things clearly for what they are. And in some cases, jumping to conclusions or making assumptions and missing the reality. Save yourself, the torment, protect your children and yourself, and start planning for the next chapter of your life. I encourage you to go gray rock, do the 180, w/ no contact unless it’s things regarding your children. I give you credit for trying to make this work…
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/23 07:01 PM
1

I would do a few things immediately today. 1. Contact child protective services and file a complaint. 2. Hire a lawyer, go to her parents home. Find out where she is and get that child back to you. 3. Draft up child visitation schedule that all parties can agree to and live with going forward. Good luck
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/23 06:35 PM
1

You are in a very difficult spot right now OP. To me this feels like a ball and chain. you need to get really sharp wire Cutters, cut that chain and ball off your leg. She is toxic, only going to wear you down in life. You need to get at least 50% custody to protect your children. She needs to go back home to her parents and let them figure out what to do with her. Split up all your money as fast as possible so she doesn’t do anything stupid. Get your name off that extra credit card. Separate yo…
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/23 01:49 AM
2

From what you’re describing, she is working you over mentally and wants control. UnFortunately you’re giving her control by wanting to take her back. how long will you let her manipulate you? You need to step up and put your big boy pants on and take charge of the situation. if you want to be with her and she says no you need to MoveOn. Stop tormenting yourself. That’s a toxic personality. Who’s running circles around you. Get away and go find a better woman.
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/23 01:26 AM
6

Sounds like the wife of the Utah real estate husband. She was wacked out, she poisoned him w/ fent, he OD, she called the cops and said “this is so strange, no one just dies in their sleep?!” The cops booked her, trial is going on now July 2023, she will go to prison. His sisters saved the day by sharing a recording of the husband saying “if anything happens to me, the wife is enemy #1.” She was. And is the dumb ass.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/23 04:03 AM
25

It seems the cloudy affair fog causes this shit female behavior often. I call it emotional attack dog. I have at least 5 friends who have gone through this with a WW, an emotional dogfight cloud in the downfall of their marriages. One guy went so far as to video record the wife and her bad verbal behavior, and then went over to visit her parents and shared the whole story. He just wanted to share the truth before she started lying about things. As it turns out, she tried to paint her husband as …
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/23 08:58 PM
1

I would round up some nice big friends and go pay little home wrecker guy a visit to have a friendly chat. Once he spills the tea, who was the instigator, weasel boy or WW? Then you stop trying in marriage. No begging. Go grayrock, do the 180, no contact, except for children. Write up your narrative and publish it to family and friends. That way you share the truth before her bs machine starts rolling. Protect yourself. Maybe install mini cameras and VR in the home before you split up to protect…
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/23 08:54 PM
1

I agree with you for trying. This sub is heavy with dump and run.
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/23 07:52 PM
3

OP, good on you to take charge of the situation. Most of us want to know, what it’s going to take to get her to realize you’re the big engine on her tiny little train going down the tracks of life? Do you know if she has a guy or girl on the side? Seems odd to hear about the big D and then she does not have a lawyer. Wishing you the best outcome. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/23 06:53 PM
3

You can find another women who will respect you and treat you better. Stbxw is trying to fuck your head space. Dont give satisfaction of this in anyway. Be big and strong for yourself. Stand up for you. No one else is going to do it unless it’s you. I suggest go gray rock, do the 180 and no contact and don’t show any reactions to her bad behavior. Move on quickly and when the papers are finalized, go live a better life. Be safe out there.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/23 10:18 PM
3

Make someone prove it. Better get a strong legal counsel. Fight for you. Women that make up this shit are lower than whale poop. Manipulate a judge, and the police and you with fake stuff. It’s too bad there’s not harsh penalties for false accusations like the women should go spend a month in prison.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/23 08:40 PM
2

Pay the neighbor kid $20 to hand a note with his wife’s cheating and your ex cheating stories. Then pay the kid to give copies to their wonderful parents and say “nice job” on the back of the envelope.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 10:25 AM
1

This is good shit here. Eff her. In court, I would never admit to anything. I also don’t think it’s going to do any good to have your own list. I hope you get what you need.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/23 11:00 PM
2

Its time to cut the marriage apron strings. She checked out on you, the family, the marriage. She is for the streets. The sooner you accept it the better. This is a tough love conversation. Let go, move on. I applaud your commitment to loyalty. She left the party 2 days back. You need to see it and go.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/23 06:22 AM
1

I like to hear men get out from under the boat anchor woman who was holding him down under water. Now you can breathe and move about freely and go live that life. You always wanted to live. Congratulations on finding freedom and escaping the bad life you were in. I respect you for taking the steps to get out.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/23 03:44 PM
4

That anger toward you is unfounded. Buyer’s remorse. I would say “Sorry lady I got nothing, you cheated, you filed, got what you wanted, kids schedule, money, new cute little boyfriend. Dont give me your shit face. You did it all.”
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/23 12:42 AM
2

OP, sorry you’re going through the circus right now. Getting to the goal line of a finalize divorce. Sounds exciting the challenges working through all that timeline before you get to the goal. Stay active, eat, healthy, go to the gym and exercise, buy yourself some nice clothes. I would treat her like the gray rock, implement the 180 and go no contact. she’ll see what she’s missing, and how hard life is going to be without you.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 05:15 AM
2

I really hope his legal team tells her to FO.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 05:09 AM
1

I would start doing some research. Somebody’s giving her dime store advice and unfortunately she’s following it. She’s working you good and you got a find a way to get back on top of the situation. You need leverage. Fight for your son as much as you can. Don’t let them get the advantage.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/23 01:18 AM
17

I think women holding things in, and her lack of open / honest communication is a very common occurrence. I’m hearing it from my friends who are going through divorce. These Wives dropped a bomb on the husbands. Wives checked-out, didn’t say anything until the very end. Its a sad day in the man’s world.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/23 04:55 PM
3

Your needs are valid. As are hers. If she shows no interest in you or your needs it maybe time to part ways. However, if she shows interest in hormone therapy and gets her groove back, things could change for the better. Both parties have to be willing to work hard to make it get better. Save it before blowing it up.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/23 11:40 PM
9

Is there any hope of saving this marriage? What if you said we need to talk about things. Say, I want you to cut back to 30hrs a week and reinvest in us, our marriage. You and me, get back to being the sexy girl I married. I’m still right here. If you get a hard no, blah blah, $$. Then you know her position. Proceed to defcon 5, shinobi nuclear destruction divorce. She will be paying you until son is 18 and maybe spouse support for 10 yrs. I would love to see you guys stay together and make it w…
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/23 11:33 PM
3

Agreed. Its not just get over moment. It’s a heart breaking situation. Most men are still very upset. By saying just get over it show you have no heart to understand others pain / suffering. Zero empathy=detached narcissistic behavior.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/23 11:23 PM
6

A nice summary of the results men face due to the broken legal system. The financial calculator is messed up. I heard a divorced woman said how much is it worth to squeeze out those kids for you? Huh how much?? I said mot 50% of my net worth.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/23 09:43 PM
4

It sounds like you are not ready to go out yet. That’s cool. You recognize your mind and soul are not thinking about more turmoil or meeting new peoples. Lets wrap up the current mess before saying Hi to someone new. I encourage you to get out of the house and interact with friends, co-workers or family. Socializing your new status will be good for you. Maybe hit the gym and pump up those arms and shoulders. Go find some nice new clothes that fit and highlight your shape. Eat better, read more, …
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/23 04:02 AM
1

Keep records, share with court/ judge. Cite the danger it poses to young one. Ask for full custody and say you got this for the child stability.
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/23 05:23 AM
3

Hire locksmith guy yesterday and solve your shitty problem. Call her 5 minutes after its done and let her know the neighborhood watch group recommends updating your home security due to some unknown lady breaking into homes in the area.
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/23 04:58 AM
2

OP, stay steady. Stay in home with son. Legal leverage for you. No outbursts. What is your proof or evidence? Photos, recordings, you followed her??? Split monies 50-50 now, open new bank accounts for you. When ready to confront, tell her she needs to pack and leave so you have time to think about things. She can be gone 2-7 days. Make child visit schedule, 1 week on, 1 week off. When she comes back, she now lives in the spare room. You stay in the master bedroom. Mom might help or be a roadbloc…
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/23 04:32 AM
3

Not to pile on but holy shorts, how did legal council not specify what wife move out looks like. That is gross negligence, gross misconduct or a gross lawyer. You may need to change your legal representation. Woofda.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/23 05:07 AM
1

Because someone was whispering in WW ear to destroy you. 0P, I am truly sorry you went through this. There is no logical explanation for what occurred. I’m hoping you can reach back out to friends and family and find out the reasons why or what led to this destruction of a marriage. Is there any chance she was cheating? Can you check phone records? Do I need other detective work? Follow her around and learn more? Again sorry you went through this and I hope you can heal and start a new chapter i…
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 04:42 PM
3

Could it be a simple as she just needs some attention? She just needs physical release? She still has feelings for you? She would try to use the sex against you and give something to her lawyer to make you out to be the bad guy? I would be curious and cautious too. Those are the first thoughts that come to mind.
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/23 01:45 AM
1

I would state in your story this is a short term shitty living situation. you have a plan for a different place to get away from her and her cheating boyfriend, but also take good care of your son. That is an important point to note.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/23 10:18 PM
2

Why in hell do you live in the same house together? Why would you allow swtbw to bring asshole AP in your home? That. Is. A. Hard. No. Not in a million years. She is determined to ruin your life 1 police visit at a time. Get away. Far far away. Sorry you have this horrible situation. I pray for your escape to go live a better life.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/23 10:02 PM
1

Are you saying how how does a 60+ man get back in the chasing sexy chicks game?
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/23 12:43 PM
3

You need protection for you and your children. You should have access 100% of the time. That may require legal support. Pull out phone a say I’m recording this conversation. No screaming or yelling to paint you as bad parent. Where else can she go? If its next door, that might be the best move for you. They’re still close but the cheater is out of your hair. No more nagging, bitching about some shit, do this, that, the other thing. Could also be a good time to tell her parents about her wayward …
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/23 10:46 AM
3

Another example of the broken economic model that favors women in divorce court. It would’ve been great if you would’ve packed up your stuff, and move to India, and never to be found again tell her to fuck off.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/23 05:16 AM
1

It sounds like buyers remorse. Did you file for a reason or you “fell out of love”?
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/23 03:49 AM
2

I would close the social media accounts for the time being. Pause FB, Twit, Insta, etc. Tell judge, I’m taking a break until I get my best life sorted out after escaping narcissist crazy lady here.
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/23 03:46 AM
0

You say mo fucking way. I will go to the judge with your petty bullshit behavior. Do not give in here. She is working you to see how far she can push you. Stop her in her tracks. Get your lawyer on the horn with hers and schedule meeting with judge to review children drop off clothes rules. Ring little kids in the heat with no clothes on is cool. Her and you come out here.
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/23 03:37 AM
2

Every situation is unique and different and has many many variables. We can’t see on the outside. I think a general statement like you said it’s not always true.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/23 04:57 PM
2

I’ve often wondered about this myself. I find this topic. Very interesting. Would love to hear from a qualified counselor/analyst. I would correct one key point on women. They tend to need men for financial, safety, security, support means more than intimacy or affection. I would put those light or two items in the bucket for men. I would move your #5 up to either 1 or 2. I know at least seven men who are existing in bumpy, crappy marriages for the sake of their children. They won’t destroy thei…
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/23 02:48 PM
1

It’s OK buddy, we all go through down times in life. I look at it like it’s a season, it might be the hard cold winter season for you right now, but the good news is spring time is summer are coming and you can come out of the gray clouds and get back to a normal life. Glad to hear you’re working on yourself over these past few months. I’m a believer in self improvement to get back to Healthy mental state. Wishing you well.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/23 02:43 PM
5

If it weren’t for your daughter, you would cut her out of your life completely. Only communicate when it comes to the kids. I’d like the idea of gray rock, do the 180, go no contact that way you lead the situation. Completely ignoring her and any activity related to her. She doesn’t matter now.
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/23 11:42 PM
6

She’s working you and does not care about the nuclear explosion. I could never be around a woman like that. Trapped and dealing with bad behavior. She is of low moral character. She gave up. You can leave for your self respect, self esteem, self reliance of who you are as a person. She is running the ship into the ground. You must escape for mental well being. You can find better. You can do better. There must be a better woman out there for you.
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/23 04:56 AM
1

Bottom line, she made a terrible decision, and it’s gonna be tough for her to live with it. These are some of the mysteries of life that are hard to understand. Hoping you can find another wonderful woman to fill that space.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/23 06:43 PM
1

Just like the Winter movie, let it go, let it go, let it go. I didn’t read anything about children, so I’m glad to see you don’t have any little dependence running around your feet. I’m really glad to read about your support systems and people that are telling you the truth that your relationship was toxic. I know you say you want to be friends, but I think it’s better for you to have some time and space away from her so that you can start building her life without her. No need to worry about he…
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/23 04:35 AM
3

If it were me. I would greyrock, go 180, no contact unless it was children related. Otherwise FO.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/23 04:26 AM
1

This is a bad momma and the court better drop the hammer on her. Award the Husband 100% custody. Hope you win this thing.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/23 04:21 AM
1

I would record every interaction with her until the divorce is final. If you don’t trust her and she broke your trust in the first place, then it’s game on. I would also set ground rules for the separation. There will be no smashing in this house, there will be no bringing any men or dates to the house. Hopefully you’ve got all those stipulations listed in your separation/divorce agreement. If not, go back to your lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 11:04 PM
7

I’d say you just experienced a full bout of second guessing and regret. She cried because she broke the marriage, broke the relationship and it can never be repaired. She will feel guilty for years. You could use it as a stick and beat her down or you can co-parent happily. The choice is yours.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 10:25 PM
3

Continued success happy lady. Glad to hear you escaped and you have a four legged best friend.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 10:22 PM
1

It all depends on your perspective. Sad, he could have tried harder. Hmm.. your guy sounded like a bum. He didn’t fulfill his end of the contract.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 10:08 PM
4

Yea these mods ate as unpredictable as the flipping stock market. As the poet laureate, Forrest Gump used to say. Reddit moderators are like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 06:57 PM
3

I think you’re going to need to separate the good from the bed in order to move on to Healthy life. You may have been codependent on her for your happiness, and all that abuse she keeps on you may have paid you somehow still dependent on her. Glad to hear you’re going to the gym and getting in shape, if it were me, I would break all ties with her go gray rock do the 180 and no contact. Find some time and space apart so that you can become a different person without her.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 04:14 AM
15

Congrats OP. Men crave peace, quiet, tranquility. Women seek to erase that state of mind. I am very happy for your peaceful day. I envy and admire you x10. Great day.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 03:51 AM
1

I cant tell if she is lazy. Having post baby blues. Mental health disorder or other. You both sound miserable. I’m thinking you do whats best for your daughter and for you. You describe a disconnected spouse who does not sound like she wants to reconnect. The million dollar question is how to restart the fire in this relationship? Would improve communication help here? Do you need a third-party moderator for marriage counseling? Do you have a number of options to try to resolve this roadblock. I…
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/23 03:35 AM
2

Put some ice on the bruise. That might be my first wife, biting husband story, ever. At least she picked a big, fleshy muscle. So sorry you’re going through this drunken mental health implosion. No man deserves this shit in their life. Glad to see your son stayed calm during the whole disaster. Hopefully you and grandma can get her back on track. I agree a separation for you would be great. For her it’s probably going to cause a lot of pain. Maybe her side of the family can get her into counseli…
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/23 12:49 PM
1

I have not been through this scenario. My friends have and they concur with this rationale/ thinking. (We discussed over coffee.
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 07:06 PM
22

Document. Make a timeline. Get her to agree to your observations(kinda like a sign off). Share with your family so they know her game and the truth before she tries to rewrite history. Rug sweep. Act like everything is ok. That document (image) will be shared with children when age appropriate. No letting cheater wife off the hook. There must be consequences and discipline for bad behavior. Dont fall for the game playing and manipulation. Be strong for yourself and your children.
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 05:26 AM
5

Go find a free legal divorce consult. Ask for a spousal support calculation. Learn your options and their costs. Once you have all the data, make a good logical decision. Uncouple your finances. Remove your dependency on her. Separate from joint accounts. Slowly take her name off beneficiary documents, change your will. Change direct deposit on paycheck. Cut her off. Only deposit 20%. Use the rest to pay critical bills and keep her grubby fingers out of your finances. Wishing you well.
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 04:49 AM
1

Your lawyer needs to bring this frivolous divorce order to the judge immediately. No need for a hearing just prove she is cuckoo crazy lady and wasting everyone’s time and money on fake claims, lies, trying to fool the court. She cant keep her shit together. Maybe evidence of being an unfit mother. Change custody form 50/50 to 75/25 favor the steady normal father. Ding ding, Dad for the Win!!
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/23 03:58 AM
2

None of the men I know like fake women. Boobs, butts, lashes or whatever, it’s not worth it. Your ex sounds lime a nice narcissist. Good thing you escaped. Be well.
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/23 11:56 PM
3

Cameras, record, record, record all this shit behavior. Off to lawyer then the judge. Show them evidence. Say, see this crazy ass bitch is making false claims, projecting her crazy shit on me when in fact it’s her who is the fucking nutbag. Any court will see she needs to be on a TRO and you always need a 3rd party witness for safe space. Pay them if you have to just to cover your tail. She is beyond a narcissist, she’s dangerous. Be safe out there. Wishing the best for you.
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/23 04:15 AM
8

You may or may not have missed your opportunity to put some kind of a stipulation in the separation/ divorce agreement regarding children, handoffs between parents. If this language is not in your agreement, go back to your lawyer and get it added. I agree with you. A false claim is a big deal and it’s a lie, the fact that it was fabricated is a travesty. There’s no reason you can’t push back and get this whole thing arranged to your satisfaction. I like your take charge attitude. Wishing you we…
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/23 03:56 AM
1

If you like living where you are, if you want to stay, you need to file for divorce and get a really good lawyer and make her stay. Never give her access to move to another province. You could lock her down in your current location for 18 years. I truly feel like she’s over reacting and asking for a divorce because he won’t move to her hometown. Seems ridiculous. Maybe she should be the one to sign over custody rights to you. Best of luck. Stay safe.
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/23 03:34 AM
0

You earned your stripes as a father to those children. You are Dad not some guy named Mike. Push back on her bullshit. Tell your kids not to follow her wishes it is mind games, manipulation, weaponizing your children against you. Go back to lawyer and say “no ‘effing way this is parential alienation.” And if you try that again, have her parental rights revoked or custody impacted. There is no reason for her to work your children like pawns in chess match.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/23 04:13 AM
2

I would get advice from a lawyer. If you can’t afford one ask the family court, if you can talk to a county legal representative that can offer you free advice. I think the clause is very reasonable and should be included in any documentation for the relationship. Your ex sounds toxic and unstable. she’s harming your children mentally by yelling at them. Especially in a private personal moment like bathroom work. I have children in a similar situation, and it takes a tremendous amount of patienc…
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 04:39 PM
1

I like this plan. Yes I do because it a subtle consequences for her shitty behavior and in the end she will be a dumpster fire wench with new dirt bag guy. I predict she never figures it out and goes on to live a miserable life. That opens the door for you to take over as full-time parents with 100% custody of the potential to be up super down and available for any new orders. I hope you win this battle.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 04:49 AM
5

If hostile toward you, all comms. go though lawyer. Any hostile toward children, she loses parental rights. All hostile bullshit has consequences. Flip the script. If it were a man being hostile, the woman would claim abuse and be given the gold coast of Australia. Always Protect yourself and your children. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 11:01 PM
11

There are multiple ways to deal with this conundrum without getting backdraft. Anonymously, You could put something in a mailbox that says “hey your wife is polishing the knob of these five guys. I recommend you go talk to them”. You could slip something in a car late at night. I would try multiple approaches. He needs to do some homework and check on his WW. I agree with your comment about letting the guy know. If you were the person getting white washed by a cheater, blindsided and somebody co…
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 09:16 PM
2

OP, I take exception with your comment “you dodged a bullet”. You were together with her for 30 years and you’re 50+ yrs old. I wouldn’t say that’s dodging a bullet. I would say you’re not going to grow old together and you might find someone else, but the first half of your life was invested in her.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 08:40 PM
4

I am a fan of husbands smashing often. Your story sounds so sad with dead beds. I could not take it. So many women just cut off their men then wonder why the men dislike them or resent them for years, or decades. Maybe she could Go see a doctor and get her head on straight, get meds sorted out. Fix libido. Regain that loving feeling. Or, end a crappy marriage. Go find a compatible women that understands physical touch as a love language, tries hard to enjoy her husband the way God intended man a…
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 04:24 AM
4

OP, sorry you were going through this. Sounds like your wife is not an enjoyable person to work with. I hope for the best for you and your daughter. Thankfully, I didn’t read about infidelity. The key is how to get out of this situation without losing hundreds of thousands of dollars and having a safe landing place. Living in the bay area is very difficult and finding another living space that’s reasonably priced is a huge challenge. If you can find a way to keep the house and she could move out…
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/23 09:33 PM
3

This sounds like she may have mental health issues and you get credit for making the best decision in your life and dumping her. Congratulations. I would circle back to your lawyer and tell him that your ex is a train wreck, causing distress with your children and harassing you over minor life items. Your ex clearly has nothing better to do, and has focused her attacks by manipulating your kids, therefore, causing mental and emotional harm to her harassing you. I encourage you to get in front of…
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/23 04:43 PM
3

You need to look out for you and your children. You need to plan for your pending divorce. Retain legal council, talk to your family let them know she is a cheating b|+€# giving up on your marriage and family. Get tested for std. Dont lose you patience. No yelling or screaming. Don’t let stbxw paint you as a bad dad, or unstable father. Lawyers can make you look like a monster when you’re not. It’s more important for you to be the big strong dad take charge of the shitty situation and lead it. L…
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 12:11 PM
3

Well if you are OK, keeping things separate from a wife who could be deemed a Golddigger versus the love of your life and your soulmate keeping certain things private might be OK. I would have a rock solid prenup, she signs, has no idea of your holdings, accounts, property, jewels, foreign accounts, etc. then sure, it could work. Otherwise, no, women just throw men over a barrel and drill the Lincoln Tunnel in their backside. I blame all this on a terrible judicial system. That seems to be a glo…
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 04:09 AM
3

OP sorry you are going through hell right now. Let those feelings out in a good productive way. No yelling, screaming or destructive actions. This always comes back to haunt the men in a divorce with lawyers, the lawyers paint you in a bad light, as an unstable, unfit father. After you vent come back home and be the strong leader, you were meant to be. You call the shots do you lead the discussions you take charge. You get what you want. Take care.
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 04:05 AM
1

Dont do anything until you hire a lawyer tomorrow. I am certain they will tell you the same I was going to say, hell no. This needs to be managed carefully so you dont get bent over the barrel and get ass-‘effd. Be ready to take her name off all your legal documents, your retirement, pulling up bank accounts. Make sure you take care of the cash in your savings account now so she doesn’t get her hands on it. I hope you win this chess match, it sounds like its off to an exciting start. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/23 06:40 PM
3

How far away is your family? Do you have a mother close by, a sister, long time, high school, college friends? If not go make some new friends and ask for help, lean over and look up pretty lady in the eye, and say “I’m feeling down today, I sure could use a hug. Is that ok?” She might just reach over, wrap her arms around you and give you a nice warm squeeze.
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/23 04:01 PM
2

This is an interesting scenario, not unusual marriage story. However, I feel like you were being unjustly harsh to yourself. I read the story twice, I still feel like you’re falling on the sword, a metaphor for taking one for the team. I don’t think you need to do it. I would look out for yourself, think about your happiness and contentment. Finding peace is more important than making your wife happy. Clearly your wife either has mental health issues or she’s bipolar or some thing is not right i…
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/23 03:58 PM
2

Sorry to read about WW lost in fog and pending D. I find it strange women just wander away like its all ok but spread those legs for the next bum who says “you have pretty eyes.” Glad to read about your successful escape plan and decoupling (I see a picture of unhooking last train car from the train as we pull away and let car go) from WW. May the force be with you.
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/23 10:59 AM
7

Was this housing stipulation not written into a separation or divorce agreement? If yes, execute your plan. If no, go back to your lawyer and tell them what you want. Sounds like you want the house and her to leave. In order to help this lazy women, you could go find her a new place, pay 1 or 2 months rent hire some college kids to move her things out by July 1. That plan helps her and you reach objective.
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/23 10:15 AM
14

Find out why she is pulling shady shit. No tell her what you found. See how long she tries to keep checking. I would even have a conversation in that room that’s on the camera and make her tell you why she doesn’t trust you. Ask questions like is there anything you need to tell me that’s on your mind? I hope you win this shady chess match.
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/23 09:23 PM
1

Sit down with kids, just you, have long talk about right wrong, next phase of life. Your feelings about the shit storm. Their feelings, more. Good solid talk, then breakfast and tell them you are safe space guy. They can tell you anything. Get in front of poop show. Lead it don’t chase it.
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/23 12:10 PM
2

I agree with your scenario. This leads me to ask, I’m curious if this is true with church girls too? For guys who met their ex at church (hoping they could stay faithful, keep legs closed from non husband men) do you find those women are loyal or dumped steady husband to go find new guy at gym and be fuck bunny?
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/23 11:51 AM
3

Your not letting kids down. Your wife never communicated her unhappy thoughts, desperation and now she wants to escape, flee, cop out of responsible life. That is all on her. Life is too hard. You need to stand firm, be your kids big strong lighthouse in this shit storm of life. Keep your anger, frustration, temper in check. No losing your shit by yelling, screaming to give wife or lawyers probable cause to say he is unstable hot head. Be the good guy. Be the winner. Amen.
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/23 04:04 AM
9

If it were me, and it’s not, I would not do it. I know finding intimacy, connection and physical touch from a woman who desires you versus your wife, who is trying to get rid of you, would be a great thing. For me it wouldn’t feel right, I would wait until the dust settles. You will get a wide range of responses here. It’s a matter of principle. I have had many opportunities to wander around the corner and enjoy a beautiful women. I cannot. My vows mean more. You do you and sort out the details …
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/23 03:25 AM
1

Hold those horses. You love this woman at some point. Let’s see if that spark can still come back. Make her prove it and see if it can work.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/23 05:49 PM
3

Escape might be an understatement. She’s a narcissist, toxic person, sociopath with all kinds of problems. And she picked up a boyfriend who fits her new style. Protect your children, and yourself in all costs. I hope you can navigate the divorce proceedings without losing thousands of dollars in the process. Wishing you well. I truly hope you’re the winner here.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 11:15 PM
14

All too often. You have options to help. 1. Call local police to make wellness check. 2. You go check. 3. Find his family, ask them to check. 4. Neighbors can check. Someone needs to check on him. Don’t leave him alone, bad things happen. He needs people talking to him until he gets his head together and he can rationally think through things in clear ways. Stay close, the alternative will be much worse and weigh heavy on you for years. Check your friends.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 11:07 PM
2

Sorry you are feeling out of sorts in your marriage. If it’s not too forward, why are you thinking of getting divorced? Is there anyway you can see a path to a better marriage with better communication or more transparency or some aspect of your relationship improving that you would want to stay married?
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 10:12 PM
6

She seems to have jumped the gun. A lot of disrespect right now. The key is how you react. Call police, call lawyer, call her parents, your parents, friends, someone to vent. No matter what—> you keep your shit together. No screaming, yelling. You’re the smart parent. Talk to those kids today. Have a discussion to avoid hurting them, causing confusion and damage to their minds. Is the ex that horny she cant wait until divorce is done. Some people and their taco bell run. I’m sure it could have w…
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 02:38 AM
6

No to self delete. Your life matters. it may not seem that way right now, there will be blue skies for you in the future. You need to get through this shitty time in life. Eventually, the storms in the clouds go away and you can get back to a normal life. Stand firm and strong, dig deep, hold the fort. There are people praying for you.
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/23 09:08 PM
3

I hear you and I feel for you. I’ve been there. When I’m down and out, I tend to put on my walking shoes plug in my headphones find some relaxing music and take a walk or get on my bike and ride. I may not have a destination, but I like the peace and quiet. I’m also taking a drive to a local large lake and just sat and watch the water for hours, I find the peace and solitude helps clear my head. This leads me to how to fill the time void you used to have with the full family and now you have dow…
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/23 04:05 PM
1

Pans can be replaced, your liver cannot. Be glad she is not putting something bad in your food. You might as well start cooking too. Clearly she is not good at it and does not care about household responsibilities. Have you tried open honest marriage communication? Sharing needs with each other, that might open the door to better things. Take care.
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/23 11:54 AM
3

This physical stuff with women is unusual. I’d go to judge for a TRO claiming fear for your life. Hope it works out for you and you can be the winner here. Sad circumstances.
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/23 11:41 AM
1

It sounds bad. Implement grayrock, do the 180 degree changes and go no contact. She will quickly see you dont need her for anything. Maybe even leave on her own. Protect your children they are valued and worth it.
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/23 04:31 AM
4

This is a unique conundrum. If it were me, I would skip the divorce and just start living a whole new life. I would go greyrock, implement the 180 and no contact. Maybe she’ll get the hint and leave on her own. You could Go buy new clothes, go to the gym, go out to movies, go have dinner with friends just do everything in your power to have fun without her.
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/23 02:51 AM
2

I agree with you. It is all about control and power over the other person. With the break up, she feels like she’s lost control and she hast to lean on this new dumb dumb guy for support. I hope you have good legal representation and can fight these ridiculous requests, and that the judge sees the logic in your approach.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/23 05:31 PM
2

I know a few folks who have been through this similar situation. Sadly, it’s the women who are having mental health issues. My buddies ex-wife was not stable claiming she saw People in the backyard. He was fearful for his children, called the police, they took her away, kept her under observation for 48 hours. It was a terrible situation, paying it up getting divorced. if it were me, concerned for my personal safety, I will get the marriage annulled and move on with my life. Stay safe out there.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/23 05:04 PM
1

I would get a court order to learn how much she earning on those sexy pages showing off her peaches and cream, cherries and banana boat, pink canoe holder then get your ass on that gravy train.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/23 04:23 AM
2

I think we all agree the legal system is messed up favoring the women 95% of the time. What can be done. I know at least 50 guys who are broke because of their ex WW. I have no hope the system will ever be improved. False claims, more meetings, sessions all spending more money. Its a fucking joke.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/23 04:19 AM
1

Yep. Mine too
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/23 08:46 PM
2

Another example of a broken legal system that punishes men and rewards women for the wreckage of marriage. There should be better ways to resolve this conflict with men losing everything or paying $100k.
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/23 12:18 PM
2

If you’re a woman made a whiplash decision in one day, told her she loved you in the next take him home and said she wants to divorce. Some thing else is going on, you may need to detach from reality. What you knew yesterday is gone, time to focus on a new reality of today, which could be a separate life apart from your spouse. The key is how to get your head wrapped around it and move forward. I find time and space away from that person helps a great deal. starting a whole new friend group and …
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/23 01:00 AM
1

You could open a new bank account and start putting money there. I would stop your truck deposit to any account that has your name on it and pointed to your new account. She’s not trustworthy. And she’s taking advantage of you. You need to step up and take a leadership position and fix his situation quickly.
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/23 12:45 AM
3

Not a wimp just sad for marriage mess, losing key family members who meant a lot to you. Work was just in the way, better to leave and be productive another day. Be sure to tell your boss you’ll be more focused next week. If it were me, I would try to find a social group I could go to, and have good heartfelt conversations with other people to discuss some of this pain and get it off my chest. All valid feelings of pain, suffering, loss, sadness. The key is how long will this last and what do yo…
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/23 12:31 AM
2

This scenario seems like a common thread here on Reddit. Women causing as much harm as possible, false claims, trying to fool lawyers and judges to their side of things or anything better than what the husband wants. I read this sad tale daily on Reddit. Why?
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/23 12:08 AM
3

I take my big list of things I need to get done and I start to break them down into smaller pieces or I can tackle one small thing that leads to another thing that leads to another thing and pretty soon I have a little bit of momentum and then I can get a medium size thing done leading to maybe a big thing getting done. That’s what helps me. I hope you can find some new gumption and pick up the pace and move forward.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/23 09:43 PM
1

I highly recommend you both seek a third-party counselor to work through your issues. On her side, her expectations are almost unrealistic. On your side, you’re already setting yourself up for failure. You both need to start with a clean slate, find common ground and build on that. Your current approach is very toxic to each other and will lead to D. You can make this work and still fight for a successful marriage. I wish you well.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/23 09:28 PM
1

I feel your pain. Not to ruin your orgo party but wouldnt it go better if these high stress expectations were discussed on a regular basis and all parties had same level of understanding? I learned those conversations help women get in the mood and get ready for some love making, back shots, doggie position smashing leading to successful intimacy for both of you. Only wishing you great success in you night together.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/23 07:51 PM
2

These are all excellent questions about your marriage and making plans what to do about the future. I would sit down and have a conversation with my son and let him know that none of this is caused by anything he’s done and that you love him deeply to the moon and back again. Then I would discuss your Loveless marriage about your wife so that he knows there’s more going on in the background that he can see. Hopefully he takes this info father son talk well. I would consult with an attorney, or a…
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/23 05:14 PM
1

I’m not sure how she thought she would ever get away with this crime. The fact that she and her dumb dumb husband were laying by the pool in Hawaii acting like life was normal. It’s just hard to comprehend. Are they narcissist or sociopath or psychopath? Who does this stuff? It’s just so far out there. It makes no sense at all.
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/23 04:27 PM
3

This pain will last as long as you let it have control over you. You may even want to research and track her relationship with this other guy. That’s only going to cause you more pain and suffering. My suggestion to you, you need to separate and find some time and space away from this woman. The more you go back to the well, the more she’s going to rip your heart out. Yes, your feelings are all valid. You have low self-esteem, low self-respect she has broken your ego into 1 million pieces. You n…
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/23 04:11 PM
6

Your feelings are valid and real. All your comments make sense. However, you need to find things to fill open time. Start a Hobby, athletics, a book club, biking, investment club, camping, hiking, visit national parks. Find a way to let go, move your mind to a new way of life. Focus on your wellness. You may never understand why she did what she did. There may be another guy. Please stop beating yourself up. Trying to solve a broken puzzle. You are going to be the best you, starting today. You c…
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/23 01:25 AM
1

She should be paying you. You make 60 she makes 100. Ask for alimony. She sounds wicked, selfish, whiny b|+€#. Good move to escape. Hope you win every chess move with this woman. She holds no value, probably a bad mother too.
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/23 12:31 AM
1

So many errors here, mostly by ex. She needs detox far away from bad characters. You need to set better boundaries. Listening is nice, helping, hell no. She has caused all this self harm all by herself. The ex might self delete but she needs major help. Cut ties, make the new woman great again. Go live new life with a smile and a bag of chips ahoy cookies.
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/23 07:47 PM
24

Seems like she got what she wanted and now lives alone, quiet, bored, a sad little life. Well done stupid people.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/23 04:30 AM
15

Sounds like the village idiots all stuck together. Lonely, solo, shitty lives. Well done people. Its amazing how many people are influenced by friends to do the wrong thing.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/23 04:28 AM
5

Most women downplay the need for men to need physical intimacy or sex with their wife. It doesn’t make any sense how they just don’t get it. Men need the connection with their wife or woman to share their love with that person and that’s how they do it, by being close, physical touch. When a woman decides to cut off a guy from intimacy, bad things are going to happen. A lot of animosity. Resentment, anger, tremendous frustration, and then eventually pulling away and deciding this relationship is…
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/23 09:25 PM
2

Whoa whoa. Its never too late. You are young and have many years to find a good woman, partner, help mate, a good person to go through life together. It might be time to stop going to the bars or the gym and finding the grubby rundown people there. Lets find better places to meet cute girls. Sorry to read about your ex-wife, and your mom giving you a hard time. That’s no fun. You can rise above the ashes and prove everyone wrong and show the world that you are a super guy. Be safe out there.
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/23 07:01 PM
1

It feels like she is working you. Or you let her work you. Reconcile should be both parties putting in the work. If not… the guy is hosed. Was the bad marriage all your fault or both of you share equal stake in breaking up a happy home.? This all sounds nice. I would go grey rock, go 180 and tell her in my head, fuck off. Be out of the house when not your kids day. Go meet new people. Eat better, go to gym, get new shirts and pants that make me look great to new babes. Show others your a catch. …
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/23 02:37 AM
1

I disagree. I can see him pay her an $m amount, I dont see her getting more than 5-10m. I am sure his legal team has him safely insulated by various safe guards.
/r/Divorce_Men04/05/23 07:09 PM
1

Spot on sir. These other goofs have no clue. She will get $M just not a lot. I predict 5-10.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/23 07:09 PM
4

Thats just your misguided opinion. He is well protected and Smarter than you.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/23 02:46 PM
5

Pretty sure his lawyers have a pre nup in place to protect his net worth which is estimated north of $250m.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/23 12:45 PM
1

I would take a little different approach here. You sound disappointed that she’s out dating, however, I would focus on the fact that you need to be happy that she’s out of your life and she can go cause harm, pain and suffering to someone else’s life and not yours. The good news is, you’re released, you’re free, you’re able to go make a better life for yourself. You got separated and divorced for a reason and you should be OK with everyone moving on to their own space in their own time. I encour…
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/23 03:21 PM
1

I luv new guy never in your house.
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/23 03:11 AM
1

I admire your strength and resilience in a very trying times, a cheating wife will ruin a good man. A cheating wife dating already and trying to integrate kids with new AP is bad on every level of the candy cane forest. I hope you and your kids stay strong while your WxW lives in cheater fogginess. Be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/23 03:20 AM
1

Well I for one hope you win more custody because your stbxw is a cheating idiot. All sleeping in 1 room at grandmas house. Thats the dumbest thing ever. Who farted? Oh its the boyfriend in front of your kid, just ridiculous. The kid should be with the Dad so the kid does not see hismom getting railed by some stranger. Lawyers, judges, divorce court, its all a big fat joke. Going for the W= The Dad.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/23 04:49 AM
1

Love this shit. She does not own you. You are on top of the world looking down at her.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/23 07:47 PM
3

Stand tall big dog. Good on you for holding the fort.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/23 03:13 AM
1

You need to take charge here yesterday. Immediate change is required. She needs her meds adjusted. You cant live this way, its just not sustainable. She needs clinical assistance. Or if she says no, time for divorce. Biblically it would be supported because she is abusing you and not respecting her husband. I would get her parents to take her back and get her mental health squared away. Its ruining you. Leave the other girl alone until your single. No smashing.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/23 02:32 AM
4

My first question is, was she a narcissist in the beginning or did this just happened? What an odd twist of events to go from blissful life to dumpster fire. That’s a pretty big transition in a short amount of time. Are you sure he’s not manipulating her or doing something to her to cause this behavior? I hope you end up the winner and your kids come out OK in this situation. Sorry you’re having to go through this crazy time.
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/23 05:50 PM
1

Your getting a divorce due to Other things. Like she may have cheated or she is a mental head case crazy lady. Those things still hold true. Dont focus on the outside. Focus on finding a women who is complete on the inside. It will provide you a healthy life to. Carry on.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/23 06:00 PM
1

She is clearly a psychotic narcissist. Be sure to have your lawyer document all her manipulation bullshit protection orders, evictions and the like. A judge will grind her ass for frivolous actions wasting their time. Bounce her out.
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/23 11:59 PM
0

It sounds like you got Velcroed to a narcissist. Getting unstuck is tough. She is trying to control the narrative. Dont give her that satisfaction. Tell her you dont agree with any of her decisions. You want your son MTWR, she can have FSS. Her bs dont fly here.
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/23 10:24 PM
-1

Yes x2
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/23 04:12 AM
12

I’d say there are multi red flags here. 1. She may not care. 2. She sees this as not her money. Ok to freely spend. 3. Has no awareness of legal fees. You spent 10k she spent 150k. Ignorance is bliss. 4. She knows your tracking and your pissed. Time to change tactics. Show the judge she is spending frivolously wasting funds on needless legal work. Not a responsible party to manage funds.
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/23 03:20 AM
2

Your timing seems a bit off. Filing and then a trip. A judge could wring you out for this or she could paint you badly. Why not file after the trip? Ug. I hope this does not come back to bite you.
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/23 02:57 AM
4

Filling a space, a void, an opening.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/23 11:15 PM
1

Amen to that comment. Right now, You’re The Man. Living through your victory and ding dong spouse moves. Winner winner chicken dinner.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/23 10:54 PM
1

Write your another example. Where that spouse has an agenda, a vendetta to cause harm in pain that’s not reasonable.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/23 10:42 PM
13

This fake love after divorce just makes me laugh. They just need someone to fill the gap, being needy is unattractive. They’ll take anybody after a divorce. It’s weak.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/23 10:35 PM
4

She is working you over the barrel. Time to fight back hard. Get your lawyer going on the cash assets. Split those 50-50. Jump start your money game back to stable finances. Maybe build up savings to 15-20k. Find new lady, take fun trip, enjoy life without toxic crazy-ass WW.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/23 08:55 PM
13

This is due to our broken legal system that rails men in the ass about divorce. Its the most unbalanced judicial situation in the world. Hopefully you only pay alimony /spouse support for a few yrs, >8 and you have an end date. I really dislike these stories. Most men dont deserve this result.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/23 11:49 AM
2

The point is most men dont behave this way.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/23 03:44 AM
19

Women crushing the souls of fathers who just want to be dedicated Dads. It makes me so mad. Divorce just fucking sucks. Men get railed.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/23 02:45 AM
31

Another example of a broken judicial system. Why wouldn’t they look at her past 2 yr tax return where she made fucking 250k a yr?? Why? Judges and lawyers in marriage court are idiots. Ruining good men.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/23 12:08 AM
3

Your post is hard to read. Based on what I’m reading between the lines and the whole story your lawyer is incompetent. You need someone that is going to fight for you /work on your behalf. Your wife and her lawyer are running circles around you and that’s why you’re in this legal shit hole. Ask your lawyer to come up with a better plan or switch lawyers.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 10:55 PM
11

He is paying her 60k in spousal support, 12x5=60. Plus she earns 60 in her job. She sounds like she is making bank. Enjoying the fruits of his labor.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 10:46 PM
1

Recording and listening devices are great yet they are costly and could get you into trouble with the lawyer or a judge. Instead, after every instance, I would document the situation, so go to a notebook or your computer write down the date the time what was said, try to capture everything as accurately as it happened, then bring that to your divorce lawyer and have them bring it to the judge to show that your ex is falsely creating dangerous situations and trying to falsely accuse you of wrongd…
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/23 05:54 PM
6

I’m surprised no one thought of this before now. There should’ve been a key tenant in the separation and divorce agreement written in where you say the spouse cannot bring a new man or a new boyfriend in and around your children until the divorce is finalized. Can you go back to your lawyer and add that statement? If not, you need to bring it up to the judge along the grounds of I don’t want this new person, influencing my children until the divorce is over.
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/23 05:45 PM
1

Was dating one of the key tenants of your separation agreement? If not, it should have been. Is it worth it for you to go back to your lawyer and change the separation agreement? If it were me, I would’ve written in some thing along the lines of no dating other people until the divorce is finalized. Feeling bad for you. She is rubbing her supposed freedom in your face. You can turn the other cheek and be the bigger person or when it’s your turn, go hiking and camping and have fun and do your own…
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/23 05:35 PM
2

This is an interesting, take on flying solo and enjoying it yet. Still looking for companionship. If it were me, I would have the question rolling around in my head. How much do I value independence versus how much do I want to spend my life with a significant other person, and share those special times and make memories for the future? A true conundrum.
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/23 09:18 PM
3

Get your lawyer to grow some big balls and fight for you. Educate the Judge on crazy people behavior. They need to know what shitty things happen. Do not let her mind fuck your children and drag them through the pile of goop.
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/23 04:13 AM
3

This is a spectacular list of what to do as a guy is about to get divorce screwed. TY.
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/23 10:02 PM
0

Be sure to provide an update with some of your key takeaways as it relates to your wife situation.
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/23 07:13 PM
13

I know dozens of men in loveless /sexless marriages who will never divorce due to losing millions in a legal mess. They are hurt, feeling like an ATM. The distant wife in it for the money. The guy says fuck it. No lawyers. No real wife. The wife has limits. She gets an allowance, credit cards with limits, cameras, security. No divorce. All thanks to our wonderful legal system!
/r/Divorce_Men30/03/23 03:06 AM
11

Go get a great divorce lawyer, and start gathering proof that she’s faking, lying, trying to pull one over on a judge in a court system. Once you catch her or your lawyers catch her, then the judge will grind her ass. You can still come out on top in the situation. Don’t let her get the upper hand. Retake control of this crapoy deal. Go on offense, protect yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men29/03/23 12:00 AM
1

Some bubble gum lawyer to her the custody thing can be changed from 50-50 to your favor. Here is how we do it… track his ass like a velosa raptor. Which she is clearly doing to ruin you in your childrens eyes, her parents, your parents, etc. Can you change jobs that gives you more flexibility and allows you to be home. This Clark Howard will work against you because then you might make less money and that would lower her alimony or child support. It’s a tricky situation. However, because she’s m…
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/23 04:01 AM
1

I would find out if the homeless guy is blackmailing her or she’s on drugs, or some kind of a mind game that has her all fucked up. It seems extremely unusual, but in today’s society, you never really know. I certainly hope you come out the winter in this wacky shit show.
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/23 03:52 AM
1

I encourage you to take small simple steps and find victory in those accomplishments. For example, 1. put your shoes on and go outside tomorrow at 530p and walk 2.5 miles. 2. Go find the nice headphones and Listen to calming music. I use you tube with no commercials. I listen for an hour, then pray, meditate, write my thoughts and feelings down in a notebook for 5 minutes. I feel better about myself after both events. You can find your thing and get back in the game. Slowly, is ok. Just do what …
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/23 03:25 AM
8

Usa perspective. I would never assume she’s not having a fling with a guy. I would check that. Pop over unannounced surprise visits when she thinks your working or busy. If your ok with separation and space apart, great, this could be enjoyable. Freedom. Do you want it to lead to dissolving the marriage? Cant tell if your into this woman or want your freedom?
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/23 11:58 PM
3

Your son interacting with her bf should have been 1 of the terms of the D. Yes?
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/23 06:25 PM
4

It was meant to be facetious.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/23 03:28 PM
5

Time to find another lawyer to sue Cordell and Cordell. I’ve heard they’re not reputable and helpful to men in divorces. All their advertising and marketing as a bunch of bullshit.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/23 03:05 PM
1

Great question, tracking responses.
/r/Divorce_Men26/03/23 02:38 AM
1

I got a good gps tracker for her car. It does the work. You ask the questions, got her to confess all while recording it. I was so happy. Know her BS was not going to fly. Then your good to go.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/23 06:56 PM
2

Its best to break up and go separate ways. You cannot not be the spouse police and raise children at the same time. You deserve better.
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/23 05:36 PM
5

I know some Women think the big payout is coming to them when they get dumped. Nope. Its not. We’re living paycheck to paycheck. All the grand illusions of getting rich after divorce are just fake Disney fantasies. Hoping you Sir, get a great outcome.
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/23 04:10 AM
2

If you’re working the bitcoin angle and you have a website that has a username and password an auditor will find it. I don’t recommend trying to hide assets because if you’re caught, a judge will not look favorably upon you. Send us an update, hopefully you’re not in jail.
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/23 02:27 PM
5

Cant tell you what to do however, as a guy, I would be faithful to one woman. As I have been for 30+ years. I dont agree with your husband playing around and doing double talk. He may be a horn dog but he should stay and protect his dog house. You could tell him the hurt, pain, disrespect he causes by his horn doggy stuff. I hope you do what’s best for you. No need to suffer in silence.
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/23 11:19 AM
2

This situation is about companionship not love or sex. I am sure his lawyer has an enforceable prenup Agreement. Ol Rupert needs someone to talk to and carry conversation. Not sure if it’s emotional connection or a nice friend.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/23 07:25 PM
1

That sucks.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/23 04:10 PM
1

Your first course of action should be to take those kids out for ice cream. Sit down with them and explain what their mom is doing to you and how it’s wrong. This is when women lie in the divorce process and where its broken.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/23 04:33 AM
1

Hopefully, you share the story with your lawyer and you have some direction from him or her. Depends on what the rules are for adultery in your state. Sorry to hear you’re going through this crappy situation. She clearly doesn’t care or is it trying to hide? It is her shenanigans. You can either tell her family or your family or your friend group and get everyone up-to-date on her activities.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/23 04:23 AM
2

She is using your children to punish you. Get a better plan to the judge or get your lawyer on it. Dont let this shit continue.
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/23 03:53 AM
1

Not D yet. Yes I would. New place, new people, new fun things to do. New women, after a while. I would not feel guilty about leaving. Say, screw it. She drives me freaking crazy. For my mental health, I gotta go. I would go back for funerals, weddings, graduations. I would also see my self grow into a new and better person. So yea, Boulder, Charlotte, Cheyenne, Bozeman for fun, hiking, biking, camping, try hang gliding, parachute jumping.
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/23 03:35 AM
1

It depends on what was said during arguments. Have you ever threatened her in your relationship? I get a sense this is a no recovery relationship. Go on the attack, lawyer, share her cheating with family and friends, paint her as the one who broke everything. Protect your assets and yourself. She gave up. You can still live a productive life just without this toxic lady.
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/23 12:01 PM
2

Roommates sucks especially after many years together. Find a good place for you and your kids to thrive and grow. If she is checked out is she cheating? Giving your love to someone else? Make sure you explore alimony in detail so you know your level of finances needed to move forward. Sorry to hear about things going badly. Wishing you well moving forward.
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/23 01:10 PM
0

Unless they made a deal to allow ger to keep using their equip. You may never know. You could pose as a recruiter and confirm her employment history like your representing a different firm.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/23 01:22 PM
2

I am not an expert at the rules. Basic knowledge you may have to pay her 10 years worth of alimony based on the number of years married. And it could be anywhere from 1000 to 4000 a month. Another example of our broken legal system for men as related to divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/23 05:13 AM
2

She sounds like a very naughty lady giving away the coochie too much. Do more research on the web or find a law group willing to take a free case and help a nice guy like you.
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/23 07:04 PM
1

I hope not you sound like the steady Dad they need. She sounds like a control freak, sneaky, deceitful wench. I’m curious what led to the divorce. Do you suspect her of cheating? If she’s tracking your schedule, that means she’s trying to do some thing when you’re not available. I’m assuming you’ve either caught her or she’s confessed. Sorry to hear that you have to go through this shit, I hope it works out well for you in the end and you get primary custody or continue to play a major role in y…
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/23 04:53 PM
1

I would vote yes. I would Collett cruel and unusual punishment that she knew exactly what she was doing and she did it on purpose. Now you need your lawyer to convince the judge that that’s exactly what happened. She knew a way to harm you and she took advantage of it, and did it. there may have been some implied trust on your part that she would do the right thing but again she didn’t. She will claim ignorance, and your lawyer needs to be smarter than her, and prove that she did it on purpose a…
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/23 04:12 AM
1

Is this a loveless and sexless marriage? I assume you stay for children and the divorce courts will rip you off blind. Do you suspect her of cheating? I would try to find a way to make this work, so that’s tolerable for both of you. In the scenario you described, I agree you were correct it was her fault. She was running late and she reached out to you to ask for help. The phone conversation was disaster. It’s no fun to have those kind of major conflicts in marriage. I can speak from experience …
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/23 03:44 AM
1

I did not read about her parents or other family members; sister, brother, aunts, uncles. Can they help you with the kids? Your wife is stuck in the vicious high-low game and she is losing each and every day she fails to get help. Sign her up, drag her to AA group. Tell SS your wife needs help. You need to break the cycle before someone gets hurt seriously or dies. Do it tomorrow.
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/23 12:20 AM
3

Depends on age group. Todays youth are fucking everything that moves man, woman, alien. I want a hot babe in her 40’s she’s experienced but not a 403.
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 11:53 PM
3

Let’s find the good in this story. Your rid of her and her lying cheating ways. You get to open a new chapter in your life where you can find a better honest woman. You get to focus on you and your children. Make the most of your dad time. Let’s circle back to the damage and your response to it. Yes it sucks for you and your children to have to explain all these complicated fucked up relationships. However, you’re still a good guy in this because you didn’t do anything wrong. I would find a grou…
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 10:46 PM
2

There are many steps to explore. 1. Bank 2. Beneficiaries 3. Lawyer 4. Mental health break, stress relief, chill If it’s me, I hit the bank to set up my own accounts. Take out 50% from checking, savings transfer to my safe haven. Close out any dual DC and CC. Next I log in online and start changing my beneficiaries on all my key accounts; work, healthcare, retirement,etc from my wife to my sister. I call the sister giving her heads up. Then call my lawyer hockey buddy and say, walk me through th…
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 09:44 PM
3

Record it all and then find a third-party someone neutral. Have them play it back for them and show them that their dad is trying to take care of them and that her mom is spinning up crazy flying monkey Batshit stories, causing their life, a lot of pain and suffering.
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 06:35 AM
2

I’m sure this is hard to take right now. I am a believer in time in space, time to let things heal. Space to avoid looking at that face or body and causing bad emotions/reactions know in your heart that it’s not a reflection on you, whereas both of you not together may be best for you to move on. Wishing you well in the future and finding a new love in your life.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/23 01:21 PM
1

Sorry your wife checked out on you and is terrible with money management. Those both really suck. Together it’s gut wrenching. My take, she is a narcissist and toxic. I hope the courts see you as the best parent option and give you 100% custody. I trust you can parent those cute kids to be stars as they grow up. All the best in this adventure.
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/23 04:05 AM
3

She is reaching for straws. Trying to make something out of nothing. It it were me I would dig deeper to find out how woke she is on the femme agenda. If you feel she has gone off the deep end, its time for one of those, come to jesus conversations. Hey Honey, what are your thoughts about procreation? Men having babies, strange stuff huh? That boloney can only float for a short time then it’s just BS. Learn now then decide if she’s worth keeping or worth parenting your children.
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/23 02:17 AM
1

Either way, it’s a crappy situation for most men. We get rake over the coals by a broken legal system.
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/23 10:56 PM
1

If they cheated on you then its game on.
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/23 10:43 PM
2

Is there any chance she would consider taking a different shift to save your relationship and your family? It sounds like she doesn’t wanna be a mom or a wife anymore. This is all due to her and not you and your daughter. It’s odd that she’s willing to break up a family for her friends. Glad to see your daughter is a good student and will be successful after high school. I hope this works works out well in the end.
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/23 07:09 PM
3

It may be due to your geography, but most men don’t have the same situation happening. Congrats on building up your self-esteem. If you’re a bit freaked out by all the attention, that might be a good thing. And you know it’s unusual when you’re asking for help. take it slow, set your boundaries and know what you want out of your next companion. Hope it goes well for you.
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/23 03:13 PM
1

Most of my guy friends in their 60’s talk about divorce usually bring up alimony until death. That scares them off. Stay married and be gone more often to avoid bat shirt crazy ladies. Might be better in all areas: physical, mental, emotional, spiritual.
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/23 06:11 PM
3

Calmly explain to po po ex wife is an overachiever trying to ruin your life. Use the App to manage kid stuff. Go no contact.
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/23 02:45 PM
1

They always seem to be able to screw the guy financially in the end. Broken system. This sucks.
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/23 02:19 PM
-5

Need more research here before walking away. How old is she? What happened with previous relationships? Which religion? Is she beautiful inside and outside? If all the stars line up, could it be worth it? What are her values on sex, intimacy, frequency, affection? All need answers. If she is a beautiful Christian woman who wants to fully give herself to you once you make the commitment then yes, go for it.
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/23 01:50 PM
1

Long time. Sorry you have go through the shit storm
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/23 01:42 AM
1

What do her parents, sisters, brothers, close personal friends say? Any hope or buckle up for the state fair rollercoaster ride of your life? Check your sources. Ask for a 1:1 with vague topics: lets talk. what about 2023?
/r/Divorce_Men04/03/23 07:29 PM
1

Ger lawyer will bleed you dry. They always do. Sorry to read this sad tale. Hope you come out on the back end a better man. How long is long term to you?
/r/Divorce_Men04/03/23 07:20 PM
7

I agree with the infographic story. It has nothing to do with manning up. It has to do with a broken legal system that hoses every guy that’s married to a battle ax for a wife and she just wants to rip himoff. We are not the ATM! Show some love and respect.
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/23 05:38 PM
1

Total guilt and remorse for hosing up a marriage. Admitting, failure. So we don’t think badly of them.
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/23 07:43 PM
1

Her defense mechanism is protect herself at all costs. If you quietly share with others your suspicions and her dirty trick to lie, make a false accusation. You take the lead on the narrative. She sounds desperate to save her shady image. You could blow it all up. Then again, weigh the risks, what will a judge do or say about all this activity? Judges tend to want cordial behavior. Protect you. Document her shenanigans and Bullshit. Follow your legal team advice. Be wise.
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/23 06:13 PM
1

This reminds me of the song head games. It’s the head games women play with our minds, and then the head games we play in our head. I also put this in the category of peace of mind. I know I would like to know. One easy way would be you come home and catch her? Could you have someone stop over and catch her? Could you ask a friend to keep an eye on the house? All these are extra effort on your part. Then you ask yourself what’s the purpose? Air out her dirty laundry, send evidence it to her fami…
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/23 02:31 PM
1

You have every right to be upset. How about a new bar, safe place to make new friends? Or tell the dude, hey FO, this is my place, take your chick someplace else. She messed up. You can roll on to new and better things. Time can heal your wounds. Seeing her less and removing the toxic ju ju will heal you.
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/23 01:59 AM
2

You can do this. More of a mental block. How about altering the plan a bit? If it was me, drive 2 towns over do some research on eligable babes. Go to target hang out for a few hours, go to the grocery store hang out for a few hours, go by the beauty shop hang out a few hours. Play the game of who sticks out in each location get the names of the pretty ladies. Ask one to dinner and a few slow dances. Provide gentlemanly behavior, lots of compliments and hopefully lots of heavy duty smashing. Now…
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/23 01:50 AM
1

Sorry to hear about her invading your space. That is a bummer. Every guy needs a safe space to go and just hang out and let loose. Do you think she did this on purpose? I would remove the word wife from your vocabulary. If you divorced her, then she’s gone to the streets. you need to seriously ask yourself what it’s going to take for you to move on? Even though she may still make lovey-dovey eyes to you and you know, she longs for you. You need to cut the cord turn the page and start a new chapt…
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/23 09:16 PM
1

I heard the application you mentioned, our family wizard, is really helpful for everyone involved. Meyer, standing with the GAL, they try to help both sides and get to compromise. That works for everyone. I hope you can get a good spot in the situation. All the best.
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/23 05:43 PM
8

Ex wives just shit on their men. Fuck’ em. We don’t need all their baggage. We want to lead. They are so needy. Fuck’em.
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/23 07:16 AM
2

Monster message. Wife and MIL seem dark. You might need a lawyer to end this mess. Protect you and your children.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/23 11:56 AM
1

You’re not nuts and I’m sure the tremors are valid. If it’s me, I would go to the batting cage, or the driving range, or the ax throwing place to burn off the anger, the resentment, the negative energy. I would also try to find a friend, a pastor, a counselor to help me talk through the deeper issues and move past this bad stage. You need release and coping to move past the trauma. All normal stuff. Take care of you. Maybe go get a dog to spend time decompressing. I have friends who got dogs aft…
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/23 04:09 PM
2

Just know you’re not alone in this struggle. I know many men in this same scenario. It is very difficult. If I’m in your shoes, I’m suggesting a few things to myself and my wife. First, would she consider hormone therapy for her body to get a tuneup and rev up the engine? Second, if she’s unhappy doesn’t it makes sense to go separate ways. Third, You’re being open and honest with her and telling her about your needs and yet she still doesn’t seem to care. Go smash new lady.
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/23 01:49 PM
2

Good post. Its healthy sharing your pain and feelings here. I can identify with the hurt and suffering. I’m sure most people will tell you. It will get better with time. But obviously, you still feel the same way about her, deep love and care.
/r/Divorce_Men15/02/23 06:47 PM
1

AZ. Its a dry heat.
/r/Divorce_Men15/02/23 12:45 AM
2

Men need to stick together, like brothers. Dogs too.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/23 08:19 PM
1

Sorry to hear your ex is ruining your children’s lives during the horrible divorce process. Continue, reminding the judge of your ex-wife’s actions, and how it’s detrimental to your children. At some point the judge should see the light. Hope this works out well for you.
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/23 05:05 AM
5

There is no other way to say this, I feel terrible for you, you’re in a worst case scenario. This is similar to Gomer in the Old Testament. Dont help a whore. I am a glass half full kind of guy. I assume you’re venting here or potentially looking for advice. My advice, stop helping her. You’re enabling bad behavior and being taken advantage of in the most disrespectful way. I’m sure generally you’re a nice guy but in this situation you’re being used and abused. No more being home a lot. Get out …
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/23 08:35 PM
1

I would recommend protecting your assets as quickly as possible. Do you have any idea what you think she might do? Does she know any lawyers would she go that route? Also was she the one that strayed from the relationship? There are a lot of gaps in the story, maybe you could fill in some blanks.
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/23 06:26 PM
2

Why divorce her? Is it knowing she’s bat shit crazy? You need to call a law firm to get legal lined up right away. Your wife’s terrible advice to your daughters is prove that she’s a little off her rocker. I hope this divorce goes well for you and you do not get taken to the cleaners and come out OK on the other side.
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/23 07:56 PM
2

Sad to hear the tale of divorced men getting railroaded by legal bullshit, lawsuits, litigation. Its too bad our shitty society does not have advocates for ex husbands getting raked over the coals again and again. I truly wish I knew someone who could help you. This kind of situation just makes me frustrated. I have a number of friends in the same situation and it sucks. Only hope it gets better for you and you can weather the storm and come out on top.
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/23 03:27 PM
3

Glad to hear you found some joy in getting a big part of yourself back. Self respect is important. Your Dates treating you well is good for the soul. As for the X, Moving away from toxic people is so helpful. You can see clearly now the dark clouds and rain are gone. Cut ties with XW, go NC, grayrock the shit out of her. This is a true fuck-off moment. Avoid getting drained. Build yourself up to reach new heights. You got this!!!
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/23 03:20 PM
9

Lets break this down into bite sized pieces: 1. You’re a good guy who got hosed. No need to, actually stop beating yourself up. No more guilt pain. SHE did it, not you. Let go. 2. She is toxic. If you just said, if you go back to her, she’ll do it again. You need to cut that out of your life. That will only harm you further and could push you into mental health issues. 3. It’s time to start a new chapter in life. Picture in your mind your new world and what you want to do. What does it look like…
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/23 03:08 PM
2

Gald to hear you get full custody of your 2 girls. Sorry to hear about break up/ divorce. You should be satisfied with the agreement. Seems in your favor. Cash payout to her seems good, can you round it to $50k? This lets her know your doing it as a favor, good guy move, sign of doing business in good faith. This could help if she tries to come back for more of anything.
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/23 06:12 PM
4

Finding the goodness in removing the crazy makes any man a happy happy guy. Congrats.
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/23 10:05 PM
1

I think your math is correct. 10-12 yrs support.
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/23 09:05 PM
1

Does it make sense to reach out to her family and ask where her head is at today? Especially after so many years of relationship, 13 yrs is long time. Seems pretty odd it just ends abruptly. That raises all kinds of flags (is she being forced, blackmailed, drugged) where is s the other person? Is it man or woman, older, younger, local, far away?? Is she sick? Is there mental health involved? What drove the behavior besides an affair? Your spouse doesn’t just disappear. Was she that unhappy? Its …
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/23 09:02 PM
3

Oh, wow. I like this requirement. That’s a good standard. Very good thinking.
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/23 08:46 PM
4

She sounds like a raging bitch
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/23 08:44 PM
1

Sometimes horizontal recreation is really fun for everyone!!!
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/23 08:43 PM
2

Step back, deep breath’s. It’s going to be ok. You knew this might happen or maybe you passed it in your mind. Either way, it’s happening. How you deal with it is important to your children. Be chill. Show everyone you got this and can keep his stuff together in very difficult times. Be the leader. You dont have to like him but he needs to respect you. You are the Dad. I trust it goes well.
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/23 06:31 PM
1

That is a valid fear.
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/23 04:59 AM
1

I would say you agreed to instead of allow. Who is calling the shots here? Did she chest and started the divorce proceedings? Trying to understand your dynamics here. The post is vague, causing speculation. If you could clarify that may help.
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/23 04:58 AM
1

You need a companion. Someone who cares for you showers affection on you and truly loves you. Right now your wife is not meeting that critical need. 99% of men feel this way. Have a heart to heart discussion with her to tell her your needs. She should know your very unhappy and that is leading to end your marriage. If she cares, she may change or get meds or do hormone therapy or something a women does to show she still wants her husband. Ask her if she sees it, does she see how she is hurting y…
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/23 04:28 AM
1

You may be in a no win situation. What to do if you stay. What tk do if you go. She is being unreasonable.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/23 07:55 PM
1

Follow her her, catch her, take photos, contact company, divorce her, go live a much happier life. Oh and find out how long she and co-worker have been noodling together. Then go 180 cold turkey. Say bye.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/23 04:34 PM
0

Thankfully most women are not like this. You are definitely in a difficult situation. It might just make sense to end the relationship and move on to live a better life. What’s holding you back from divorce or separation? Could you hire a low end maid service to help with house cleaning? Doesn’t sound like you respect each other or that you’re treating each other very well. I don’t think this is a healthy relationship and it might be better off if you both went separate ways.
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/23 12:54 AM
1

Is this going the way you want?
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/23 01:36 PM
2

My lawyer said post-nup agreenents are not very well received by judges. However, it would be good to build that language into divorce docs. She will not touch my new business, I wont touch her 401k, etc. if you both agree on the terms with help from an agreed lawyer it could work for you. Hope it goes well for both of you.
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/23 01:15 PM
1

Get mail sent to work or po box instead of home.
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/23 01:09 PM
1

If only more judges were in favor of seeing the good the fathers do in the lives of the children. We need checks and balances in the crappy justice system. These are fun clips to watch.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/23 12:51 AM
1

If only more judges were in favor of seeing the good the fathers do in the lives of the children. We need check and balance the crappy justice system. These are fun clips to watch.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/23 12:51 AM
1

If only more judges were in favor of seeing the good the fathers do in the lives of the children. We need check and balance the crappy justice system. These are fun clips to watch.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/23 12:51 AM
2

I see this in two movie screens in my head. 1. You’re showing her that you’re a vulnerable man who has emotions and is deeply hurt by her and you finally let it out in front of her. 2. She sees how she’s hurt you and she needs to know that pain and there’s nothing wrong with breaking down and showing her the real you. I don’t have any patience for women that disrespect their husbands. Typically there’s no reason for it and it’s horrible narcissistic behavior that needs to be stopped. Stand firm …
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/23 08:03 PM
1

Its ok if you don’t both see life the same. Things change. Are you feeling like the ATM or the marriage is unbalanced? That can impact your view of a relationship. How are you defining grow apart? How are things different now than when you were dating early on. Those are the glory days what’s changed since then?
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/23 06:08 AM
2

Good on you. I like your attitude. Go forth and conquer life.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/23 03:08 AM
2

Sorry OP. This is a sad story for you. The way you describe her behavior it sounds like she is sharing intimate time with someone else. She is not showing respect to you. No remose or emotional release? Seems odd. You mentioned weight, Your message was a bit cryptic although I gathered that you’re both losing weight. Do you see her dedicated enough to get back to her attractive days? Woukd she do that for another man? can you follow her and see where the time goes?
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/23 02:16 AM
1

I would pay the lump sum. No need for a monthly reminder how much I hate this situation.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 09:44 PM
3

I get a sense that you need to let this go and move on. She’s renting valuable time and space in your head and it’s eating you alive. Time to cut the cord move on. Go live a better life without her.
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/23 05:29 AM
2

Wow that’s an amazing situation to live through. I’m struggling with how women get to this point in their lives. I hear it so often. I think your safety is the most important thing right now. Make sure there’s no guns or knives or anything dangerous in her accessibility. Can you loop in her family sister‘s brothers parents to help keep an eye on her? Avoid self delete. She is clearly unstable. I hope you can escape safely and move on with your life. There’s no reason you should have to put up wi…
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/23 10:34 PM
8

I’m a big fan of journaling. I would start making a list of the things you disliked about her. Push that up on the refrigerator or in the bathroom by the mirror to remind yourself. When I’ve had these difficult heart breaks, time is the healer of all wounds however you can’t rush it. You need to go no contact for a while outside of your children and be cordial. This will help you get her out of your head and you can go live your best life. Wishing you well.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/23 05:13 PM
4

I agree all of that fun stuff is short term success. It’s never sustainable and will never build into a decent relationship. They can fuck around all they want but they’re never going to grow old together. Or travel to Europe together. That’s the part that’s funny.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/23 04:43 PM
6

I can’t tell if this is a joke or it really happened. Either way it’s an epic response. I love it just awesome.
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/23 09:43 PM
3

Go Giga Go. I would start everyday saying, “Ka’chow, 2023 is all about me.” Make choices that make you happy in your key life areas; family, friends, work, travels, hobbies. Know what you want, go get it.
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/23 06:14 PM
3

Are you sure this topic shouldn’t be posted on the R/survival sub reddit? Excellent topic of conversation I look forward to reading the comments.
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/22 06:07 PM
2

Paypal can be anything. Dont make assumptions. Large money movements could be income and vendor payments. Maybe ask. Go to bank. You can easily open an account for just you. Put your funds in and be safe.
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/22 12:34 AM
2

One upping you. Its petty.
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/22 12:13 AM
2

Why would any guy do it. Lose everything you built up for retirement. She gets off scott free. I heard from a buddy who is checking into divorce; the filing fee is between $300-500, the divorce could be 7-25k depending on how it goes, motions, filings, legal BS AND she will get 50% of his assets approx. $500k. The system is a train wreck, dumpster fire with fireworks and popcorn.
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/22 07:32 PM
2

There is a special place in hell for cheating friends right next door to cheating wives. Sorry to read this. It sounded too abrupt of a cut to be normal. This guy needs to know he is a lowly dog feeding on scraps. By meeting her family behind your back proves he is scummy low life garbage eater. Time for new friends. Do you have anyone you can talk to, confide in, bounce ideas, sounding board. Church, social group, trusted band members who will listen and not turn on you. I hope and pray this ro…
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/22 03:15 PM
8

Way to go big dog. If we were in the Army together we would hang. I got your six. No man left behind and all the oo-rah. Good to hear you stopped the self delete idea. Excellent move to call the help line. A very strategic move to change from the hunted to the hunter, from prey and flee to attack, seek, destroy. Loved your pivot move to become a triple threat. I hope it worked out professionally, financially and socially. Maybe find a nice women that cares and can be real to you.
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/22 01:47 PM
3

Thanks for sharing personal finances with the group. Sorry you got screwed by a Bad woman. The system is broken. Men get ass fucked by our woeful laws in these life situations. Just hate to read this shit. Fucking women. Chaps my shorts.
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/22 01:31 PM
2

What about spouse support? Do you feel there could be another guy or girl in the picture? Could you trail her and see if she is seeing someone else. Sorry to hear about you bringing her home on your nickel and getting dumped. I am curious if she stays on meds and lives a cold and lonely existence. Crazy A parents don’t help anyone. Just muck up marriages.
/r/Divorce_Men28/12/22 01:18 PM
1

Then shamelessly flirt, woo her, treat her well, whisper in her ear, nibble on neck, ask if ok to kiss her, rub shoulders…. Smashing for hours. Happy face. Breakfast. Smiles.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/22 08:52 PM
2

A nice women to share a comfortable conversation.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/22 08:44 PM
7

You sir are the big winner today. Qwerty for the win!
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/22 02:55 AM
17

Congrats. Consider yourself fortunate to be rid of your xw for such a low cost. Well done. Early Christmas present. Curious if anyone cheated?
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/22 02:24 AM
1

Contentment in women seems to be this elusive thing. A man could chase it to his grave and still come up empty. That is gut wrenching. I see some women who follow a faith based life seem satisfied with their position. Sorry to hear she blew up your lives. when your kids grow into adulthood you can tell them what a selfish bitch she was and they can watch her to prove it’s true. I am curious if she ever went to a psych. For counseling to acknowledge her messed up head or friends and family let he…
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/22 02:11 PM
6

Feels like r/ mods are w/ fbi
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/22 01:57 AM
2

…Are lazy. Put forth no effort. Just lay there. Makes the whole experience a downer.
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/22 01:54 AM
1

Then it’s all about self-respect. If you have it, great. If you don’t, get it and move on.
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/22 12:04 AM
1

Depends on what kind of lasting memories do you want to leave her. Do you want to be known as the really good generous guy or the you’re on your own guy? If you’ve already bought them, give them away either to her or somebody else.
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/22 12:02 AM
1

Nope. Its on her. Unless you feel like being a super duper nice guy.
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/22 10:17 PM
2

I think you need to be more dominant male leader in your home and take charge. Don’t except no for an answer. When you want something you take it. When you need something you go get it. Her behavior sounds like she’s giving her love and attention to someone else outside your marriage. Any chance you can get her phone or her laptop and check on some of her behavior? The whole thing sounds a little odd. Have you Marriage counseling or individual counseling. There must be some kind of blockage that…
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/22 03:42 AM
2

Your post raises some interesting questions, what were your expectations? If you both agreed on the divorce than it sounds like you’re both going in different directions. You may need to reset your expectations and plan for a future solo until you get your feet underneath you.
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/22 09:15 PM
1

Agreed. The system is badly broken. Very frustrating and unfair toward men. I enjoy reading about big money women having to pay instead of husband.
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/22 01:09 PM
1

Sometimes its ok to pause things in life. I look at this as a season. They come and go, they have a defined timeline and a new one is just a few weeks away. I know D is bigger than just change of weather. I used the seasons approach to help me get through the loss of grandparents and close friends who died early in life. I also used it to help me deal with getting laid off from corporate America, feeling like a piece of shit. Gives me a chance to think on it, dwell and within myself. And then bu…
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 02:11 PM
1

If only it were that easy to overcome stupid women. #ItsNot
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 02:07 PM
1

Most women would say oh I dont know how it happened. Like she is a ninja spy liar cheater. Maybe they do just want out. I say go. Just leave me alone. In peace. I can find a better person than you.
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 01:45 PM
4

Sad story to lose a spouse who was not well in her head or heart. Very glad to hear that you are now in a better Place as a Dad and as a single man. Hopefully you’ll be able to replace your lost life with companionship of a good woman. Wishing you well.
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 01:30 PM
1

I agree. Women a fucked up little girls who grew tits, hips and asses thinking they can get what they want with a shake or jiggle. Hell no bitch. Wake the fuck up. Get out too. Cheater!!!
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 05:24 AM
2

You said out 4x in the post. We get it, you’re frustrated, angry and wanna move on. However, there is smart moving on and there is ridiculous moving on. You need to choose the path of smart in order to move on successfully. Go get a lawyer and only do what the lawyer says. Protect your assets and yourself at all costs.
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 01:59 AM
3

Its like they have no idea what they did and the devastating impact on their man. Most men move to protect mode and cuts wayward women out of life. Because she hurts people. No need for any more of that bs. Bye lady. You gotta go.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 03:13 PM
4

Its like they don’t even admit or recognize the hurt inflicted on the man. That chaps my shorts.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 02:58 PM
6

I’ve heard from a handful or divorced men who said stupid ex wife traded down for the sheer “thrill” of getting away with a tawdry affair. All of them Got caught, begging, turned out and living solo. Trashing families, kids, friends forever. All of these guys said the person tried to come back and they all said no then said, was it worth it? A resounding answer, Nope
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 02:51 PM
1

Amazing insight for a young man. You may not always feel this way and prenup could save you financially. Until then, “party on”.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 02:34 PM
1

Stop focusing on her. Shift all your energies to your daughter and your mental health. Get your head in a good spot. Have healthy dad daughter talks. Prepare for arrmegeddodon from your wife. Be sure your layer has Super ninja skills. Buckle up for a battle. Let go of the income gap. Its no big deal. Housing will work out. Her family treating the men badly is her environment ruining lives. Those men have no self respect or get run over on behalf of kids. Bad way to live an unhealthy life.
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/22 06:10 PM
2

Sorry to read this sad news. You are worthy as a person on this planet. Seek immediate help if you keep thinking about self harm. Dont do it. Try to separate your personal value from the woman. You are more than that today. You can focus on a new you. Grow into a new person with positive views. Find someone better. It can happen.
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/22 03:16 PM
1

While I dont condone cheating. I am impressed you found another women who meets your needs and sounds like a great partner. Based on the economics, I would stay and grind it out. Based on the love, I would leave. Sorry no easy answer here. If the new lady loves you and would marry you it might work. You need to weigh the risks and rewards. Me, I would stay.
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/22 09:12 PM
3

Your leaving out some very important details for us to comment on your “situation”. So here goes diving in… -Does XW love you? Do u luv her? -is there possibility of restarting relationship again? -do you feel your compatible in key areas; socially, spiritually, emotionally? -did the thing that caused divorce get resolved? -are you smashing w/ her or others? -do your kids think it could work again -who do you see a future w/ x or new lady? Give it some thought. These are all key areas for me if …
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/22 12:36 PM
1

Is this menopause or mental health issue? Her behavior is terrible. I agree it must stop for everyone’s safety. Does your wife need a doctor visit to diagnose something is off? What does her family / friends think of her behavior? Any family history of wacky shit behavior? Can wife go away for a while, mini vacation? In the end serving divorce papers should get her attention to discuss bad things and everyones safety. Hope it works out for you and your daughter.
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/22 02:00 PM
1

I agree. Lazy life partners suck. Its just like football practice, the slacker is hurting the team. When we need conditioning late in the 4th qtr the slacker is gassed and lets his team down because he never put the work in to stay great. The same is true w/ lazy, weak, self conscious, self esteem ridden women. I say pull your fair share; go buy the darn groceries, keep the home a home. Be the Help mate we need to build our team. Dog gone it do your part.
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/22 05:55 AM
1

Stay in your home. She wants separate. She can go find a new place or live in the basement/ guest room.
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/22 07:08 AM
9

What are the big rock issues you have with her and does she have any with you? I would sit down a speak to each other in a heartfelt discussion. The tone in your message says you want to leave. It almost sounds like you just rather serve divorce papers and walk away. Clearly you’re not happy. Before you do that I’d explore all options to find out if there’s a way to fix or save your marriage. Once you’ve done that work then it might be OK to go in different directions. I think you owe it to your…
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/22 03:39 PM
4

I agree with your key points. Women who use sex as a dating tool are not worth investing your time, talents or resources.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/22 04:11 AM
1

I like the list. These are reasonable and proper. In the software development world, we call them requirements then user stories. They lead to what gets developed as a product outcome. your list can be used the same way. I hope you find a good match and the women wants to smash 3x a week!!!
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/22 04:09 AM
4

Get home and tell her to shut up. Its your house too. Sleep in your basement. If you both agree then divorce after but being home is important to the male in this broken screwed up legal system. Men get crushed in these situations.
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/22 11:42 PM
2

Typically the therapists asks what do each of you intend to get out of the sessions together. Sounds like her agenda is vastly different than yours. Her untruthfulness proves she is not seeking to reconcile but instead to destroy. Seek shelter and protection of yourself and your assets. Get a good divorce attorney. Serve her papers first and nuke her. I never trust manipulator type women who just want to get their way, at any costs. I have no patience or Christian charity for them. They are evil…
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/22 11:26 PM
2

Nope, don’t do it. Unless you have proof; audio, video, technology, you wont get far in court unless you have sworn statements and I don’t think anyone’s gonna give you those with their names on them. I would skip the ridiculous verbal assault on social media. Makes you look like a weakling. Instead, ignore her or create the liiusion you are fine without her. I dint hear anything about you still love her. If she is still in the cheaters fog, go do your own thing w/ your friends. I hope this work…
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/22 05:54 PM
1

Clearly your wife has postpartum issues or depression or other things going on in her head, it may be mental health that’s weighing her down and causing the confusion. I’m curious how women can make these claims against men that are unsubstantiated and still have someone sign off on a restraining order when the claims are false or fake. anyway, back to you, Space man, I applaud you for taking care of yourself by going to the gym and trying to exercise and stay fit. I would also reach out to fami…
/r/Divorce_Men09/08/22 01:37 AM
2

I know. I like paragraphs!
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/22 01:03 PM
4

Glad to hear you’re in a good spot mentally and emotionally. The tone in your message sounds upbeat and positive. I’m really curious if you could share some of the top one or two lessons learned and where you’re meeting the best women to date now that you’re footloose and fancy free. I’ve heard the online stuff is really bad but I’m curious what works well now. Is it social clubs, church, sporting events, grocery stores, target (because they’re already there to buy something they don’t need so m…
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/22 04:35 PM
2

My ex is still attractive, one of the main reasons I dated and married her. Still A pretty woman.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/22 05:33 AM
2

These are excellent examples of how the system is clearly broken. There needs to be a fundamental change that balances fair market value of men in their earnings over a lifetime vs a spouse raising children. Especially when the children are grown and gone from the home, they have their own self sustaining position in life. I hate the idea of lifetime alimony. Seems so wrong on every level. I hope this works out for you and you find a good solution from all the great suggestions by other Readitor…
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/22 09:57 PM
2

Being in an unhappy marriage with many issues that cause you pain and suffering is taking its toll on your health; mentally, physically, emotionally. I suggest a few ideas to consider. First, take care of you, all of you. Second, go find nice friendly people, make new friends to encourage you, build you up, reaffirm your value as a man. Build on those ideas. I wish you well.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/22 08:56 PM
1

I think it’s important for your own mental health to be able to get it off your chest. The key is finding the right venue or outlet to do that. For me it would be going to the driving range and hitting 500 golf balls or going to the batting cage and hitting 500 pitches. You need to learn and know what works for you. I don’t think it’s going to make sense to say anything to her now. It sounds like she’s not listening and is busy making up lies and fake information just to put you in the doghouse.…
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/22 04:50 PM
2

I think it’s important for your own mental health to be able to get it off your chest. The key is finding the right venue or outlet to do that. For me it would be going to the driving range and hitting 500 golf balls or going to the batting cage and hitting 500 pitches. You need to learn and know what works for you. I don’t think it’s gonna make sense to say anything to her. However I would consider writing it down as another outlet to get it out of your head and on paper or type it up on the co…
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/22 04:49 PM
1

I agree with your actions thus far. I also think it helps you in the mental health space being able to keep your own boundaries and how you want to manage the situation and future relationships. Maybe overtime things will change but I think now while it’s still raw and you might still be upset, it makes sense to keep people at an arms length while you recover/heal or get to a better place in your own mind. There’s nothing wrong with that, I know for my sake I would consider it self protection fo…
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/22 04:40 PM
2

Get good counsel from legal experts, family and friends. I would send papers and deal with her unexpected expectations. Have a neutral party with you to discuss the current state of things.
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/22 05:08 PM
2

It feels like you’re needy? I would also ask you if you’re looking for an emotional connection or a physical connection to a woman? Do you agree with your dating person who said you’re not over your ex? Sounds like there’s still a few things that need to get worked out internally before you’re ready to MoveOn comfortably with your life.
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/22 03:02 PM
4

You’re obviously a female poster. I consider our legal system broken in the case of divorce for men. My heart breaks for the man that works his whole life saving scrimping doing anything he can to set aside funds for retirement, life after work and his golden years. Only to have to give up half of it to a potentially cheating spouse, pay for children, pay for a mortgage. The whole structure is just awful. If you don’t see that you’re missing the point.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/22 02:48 AM
2

Its cool you did it the way you did. Respecting both of them and not just smashing for fun. Nice work.
/r/Divorce_Men15/07/22 11:29 PM
1

OK now it does sound like she has daddy issues. It is very strange to be chasing someone that young.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/22 04:49 PM
1

That sounds creepy. Is he wealthy, that could cause a women to do odd things. Sugerdaddy and babycakes.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/22 04:41 AM
1

I know. What’s up with that.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/22 07:12 PM
3

Clearly someone’s whispering bad thoughts in her ears. I would assume it’s your ex or your exes manipulating someone to whisper in her ear. I would find a way to remind her a few times a year how important she is to you and that you’re still her father and you’ll love her no matter what. This is obviously a ploy by someone to cause you more pain and suffering. Be the better man rise up and over, subsequent. You’ll be better for it in the end.
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/22 03:19 AM
1

Here is a list: -Talk to her sister. A her if she knows anything going on I should know about? -more time in bathroom to get “cleaned up”, which was code word for looking nice for the other guy. The clicking of the make up items, more lipstick, lip gloss. -always tracking, asking about my schedule. Once I took the kids to an amusement park come to find out that was the same weekend she had her lover meet up. -spending money on new and nicer clothes again for the other guy. -I started tracking th…
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/22 04:51 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter