Cohabitation to living separately: is it possible?

Jenneapolis · 2021-10-11T15:38:24+00:00

I guess the question is do you want to get married eventually to him? If you do this, where does the relationship go from here? If you want to get married and you know you don’t enjoy living with him, it seems like you are ready to end the relationship. However any relationship you have is going to include the mundane stuff of doing chores and such. If I was in the situation and a guy did this to me, I would absolutely be done so I think you need to think really hard in advance because it may be impossible to move forward with the relationship after this. I just can’t see it going well.

_sotheniwaslike · 2021-10-11T16:38:39+00:00

I can understand not wanting to use the bathroom in your shared place if it isn’t clean, but why are you doing his laundry? Sometimes you just have to leave things undone until he has no clean clothes left and no choice but to do it himself 🤷‍♀️

CountTheBees · 2021-10-11T22:38:08+00:00

I think there's definitely something wrong because you two are already feeling resentful. What if you live apart, relationship goes well, but when you marry and move in together the same resentment comes back? What will change in your relationship if you live apart for one year?

Kind_Entertainment_6 · 2021-10-12T02:28:05+00:00

I am widely against young women living with their boyfriends. I’m against it because I walked this path, and lived to tell the tale.

I’ll share my story and hopefully it is helpful to you as you navigate this decision. When I was 23 I moved in with my boyfriend, similar to your story out of convenience, got engaged a bit shortly after. I spent 5 years in this situation, 5 long years with a resentment that was built so strong - Cooking, cleaning, laundry, and working 9-5. My resentment built to new heights and we eventually broke up. I felt like I spent 5 years in such a stagnant stage mentally - not growing as a person or a woman during that time.

In the grand scheme of things, looking back I realized there was no true benefit for me to live with a man in general. wife benefits for free imo

After that I got my own place and that was the best decision I could have done for myself. I got to truly know myself In a way that I did not, and when I was dating, it allowed me to properly vet the man fully. I’m telling you; it’s such an eye opening experience dating a man and seeing how he currently lives. It helps answer so many questions - is he clean, successful, stable, organized, ect. I am married now and everything worked out for me ( I thank a lot to RPW for this) but hopefully my story helped you and your decision.

Normal_Poem_8327 · 2021-10-12T15:11:15+00:00

Hey! I have been in a very similar situation (and kind of still am). I'm 24f and my partner is 27m and we have been together for almost 3.5 years. I lived with him for 3 of these and very recently moved out due to the growing resentment of living in a filthy house because he would straight up refuse point blank to do anything. This meant I had to do everything whilst also studying for a law degree and working. I moved back into my dads and our relationship is better than ever. Since I left, he does all of his own laundry, the kitchen is often tidy and he can cook for himself.

I think giving a man some space to learn to live on his own, and realising WHY keeping on top of his laundry is good etc. is very beneficial. I don't believe theres anything sexy about a man relying on you because he can't do something, it should be that you WANT to help him with these things.

After he has learned to live alone, if you guys end up moving back in together you have to set very clear boundaries to stop you doing everything for him again.

It's definitely possible, and you're both young. I told my SO that I needed more space to learn how to be an adult on my own which went down okay, its definitely a route you can go down.

Artistic-Match-5051 · 2021-10-16T12:26:29+00:00

It establishes boundaries, you should only live together if you're engaged & six months from getting married.. rollo tomassi

Title	Cohabitation to living separately: is it possible?
Author	rutababeba
Upvotes	1
Comments	15
Date	October 11, 2021 1:56 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/q5weca/cohabitation_to_living_separately_is_it_possible/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/cohabitation-to-living-separately-is-it-possible.1076310 https://theredarchive.com/post/1076310

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