I broke up with an ex about 3 months ago and was in a bit of a nun mode. I wasn't actively dating and just focusing on myself, my family and friends. I haven't gone on anything romantic with anyone since end of November.

I went on a date today intentionally for the first time in 3 months and realized some things about myself which I never played attention to before. Thanks to this sub, I saw the little ways in which I have subtly changed my approach to even a first-date conversation:

  1. I have been making an an effort to not use "like" in my general speech and could tell that the way I spoke was different from the norm.
  2. I speak slower and with more intent.
  3. I am better at subtle flirting and playfulness with just my tone of voice.
  4. I hold eye contact during a lull in conversation longer than usual (without being afraid that it will be "awkward") to increase tension and see if there is chemistry.
  5. I am a better listener. We women love to talk and I have this problem sometimes, especially when the topic is good. I make a conscious effort to ask open-ended questions and hear what HE has to say.
  6. I don't reveal all at once. This one may be controversial because I like authentic people and I like being authentic. However I think keeping a little mystery as a prequel to more deep conversation is pretty nice.
  7. I was gracious in receiving compliments and giving them. I said thank you and smiled. I felt feminine. I let the feminine energy radiate rather than suppress it.

This is in stark contrast in how I approached first dates a year ago (before I found RPW subreddit). There was no softness, little intention, less feminine mystery. I don't think I even fully developed these yet, but thanks to this first date I realize I am on the right path.

Thank you r/RPW! :)