Don’t be too nice at work…

mykulFritz · 2023-02-08T13:18:29+00:00

My general rule at work is, just be respectful. I’ve made the mistake in the past of matching my environment and the second somebody has an issue with you you have given them stuff to use against you. You can literally be in a room full of people yelling the F word and then get reported to HR and fired for saying it yourself. It doesn’t matter that everyone else is saying it, what matters is someone was offended when YOU said it.

juice2092 · 2023-02-08T04:02:45+00:00

I learned this a couple years ago the hard way. I was to available for coworkers and managers but now I rarely volunteer to do any more work than I have to unless it’s a coworker that I’m friends with and even then me and her have a give give and take relationship at work. This has resulted in managers getting mad at me at times for being “lazy” but they ultimately respect me more because they know they can’t take advantage of me. People will 100% take advantage of your kindness if you let them. It’s ok to say no and not always be friendly.

One-Top4012 · 2023-02-08T13:49:27+00:00

Totally agree! and sorry for you being fired.

I would rather be the ass** who writes a summary of every and each conversation engages with and send it written per email than keep them verbal. After years of taking punches left and right, I found this is the best practice. Last time I had my yearly review with my manager he mentioned that I am over paid (Classical! :-D) I then wrote him and all other managers in the company an email and mentioned that I am rather seeing myself underpaid and listed why I think his statement was totally wrong. After, things went smooth and no one mentioned nothing.

In short, focus on doing your assigned tasks right. all other "positive Work Environment" BS should come as secondary.

Last but not least, I do not give a S*** what others think about me. As long as I treat people with respect and help others WHENEVER I have had the chance of course after finishing my tasks.. then screw them.

Sorry for my English

Stafford0711 · 2023-02-09T02:44:27+00:00

Yes, I was a nice guy and I took everyones smiles for a good thing. Turns out those were the people who didn’t have the best interest in me.

TheNerdiestAnarchist · 2023-02-08T02:48:12+00:00

Yup, also expect to get fired, always have one foot out the door, it'll happen eventually, so make sure it isn't a big deal.

peterman86 · 2023-02-08T03:04:51+00:00

You set your boundaries on day or week one. Don't back down, but don't be a prick about it either. It's all about respect. Be the one who will pull the HR card in a heartbeat. We're not there to build a family, were there to get paid working under an agreed set of rules. They break them, you check them because the same will be done to you when it's time for you to go.

In the meantime, no matter what your responsibilities are, make sure that you are the absolute best at what you do. Let there be no second best that is even remotely close.

PheonixJ · 2023-02-08T06:50:41+00:00

You are right.

Farseer_Uthiliesh · 2023-02-08T07:23:24+00:00

I highly recommend you read The Courage to be Disliked.

Cranium_Internum · 2023-02-08T11:26:03+00:00

Being nice and expecting a reward for it shows that you're not trying to genuinely be a nice person but expecting others to cater to you for your faux-kindness, which probably most people can see through anyways. To be honest, I don't trust people who want a "reward" for their kindness either.

Appropriate-Skirt-32 · 2023-02-08T17:34:17+00:00

be always polite but never nice

Spare_Development615 · 2023-02-08T04:21:22+00:00

Are you gonna tell us what happened or just keep us in suspense?

Title	Don’t be too nice at work…
Author	JoshuaLamont22
Upvotes	54
Comments	28
Date	February 8, 2023 2:39 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/10wkzad/dont_be_too_nice_at_work/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/dont-be-too-nice-at-work.1151542 https://theredarchive.com/post/1151542

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