Do you regret for not adding any specific point in your divorce settlement agreement?

CommanderOfCheese45 · 2023-02-20T18:36:58+00:00

I should have kept my mouth shut when my then-stbx was basically having me take the kids full time. The first time it happened, I told her over the phone in discussions about divorce terms that I wanted the papers to reflect the reality of the situation -- that if I had them full time, then the papers should show me as having them full time. She freaked out wanting it both ways -- she wanted to 'have them on paper' and receive child support, but not to actually have to take care of them half the time. So she stopped sending them to me on her weeks. And then it happened again a few months later, her sending them to me for a month straight and not taking them on her weeks, and this time I threatened "if you do not take your parenting time, then I will have it revoked." She freaked out again but ultimately took her parenting time.

Welp. Not even a year after the divorce is final, she did it again. Multiple months of sending them to me every single night, not actually taking her parenting time. Actually the situation is worse -- I filed for full custody and she gets 'Disney Dad' level of visitation, but then CPS got involved and pretty much told me "get emergency custody of the kids and get them away from that woman or God help us we will do it for you." So there it is. Full custody for me, supervised visitation for her. Should've done it from the beginning.

windowlicker1000 · 2023-02-20T01:05:09+00:00

Following

QuietVisitor · 2023-02-20T01:22:09+00:00

Arrangements for a shared dog. It made sense seven years ago to allow him to travel with the kids back and forth. They needed their buddy around.

I didn’t think of what would happen once they went to college. It’s an entanglement I wish I had thought through. She clearly doesn’t care for him the same and I have no ability to change the agreement. Swap him weekly just like we did with kids.

He’s old and probably has two years left tops, but even his end has me scared. She can’t make hard decisions and I fear that when the time comes, I’ll be the bad guy once again.

If I had to do it over, I would either insist on full custody of the dog, or have included a sunset provision for when the kids left home.

Title	Do you regret for not adding any specific point in your divorce settlement agreement?
Author	mattehorn33
Upvotes	2
Comments	3
Date	February 19, 2023 10:48 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/116qg0y/do_you_regret_for_not_adding_any_specific_point/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/do-you-regret-for-not-adding-any-specific-point-in.1152060 https://theredarchive.com/post/1152060

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