I have been accused of sexual assault, sodomy, blackmail, and rape. I have never told this story before.

I always wonder how other men ended up in this Men’s Rights debate. I found it googling “What can I do about a false rape accusation.” Google laughed at me.

I have a long story to tell (using a throw away for this one). It's 100% true, although it did happen to me several years ago. This will be too long, most people won’t read. So I’ll sum up in the way people see me when I never get a chance to tell my side of the story. I have been accused of sexual assault, sodomy, blackmail, and rape. I have never told this story before. I’m going to do my best to give you an honest account of what happened, and I promise not to leave out the parts that make me look like a bad person.

Let’s do this part quickly. Smart kid, small town. Not ugly, but poor family. High school wasn't a place I shined. End up in college, turns out my poor past doesn't matter anymore. I help build a social networking site and because of that, my online identity had some local recognition that made it easy for me to meet girls on that particular site. It was not Reddit.

It made for a weird/unique experience. I had girls come on to me for no reason, being a geek from a small town where dating wasn't even an option, I said yes more than most guys get asked. As an adult I regret the low self-esteem that made me feel special when a cute girl wanted to have sex with me, but at the time, I was on top of the world.

At a party, I met a girl the night before her birthday. We make out, and I promise to come to her birthday party the next night at her party. When I show up, she making out with another girl. I grab them both and take them home. We have fun, and there are photos that we took turns taking that night. It was a pretty good night. (This becomes important 3 years later)

This is a 2 year story. None of it was worth telling until the day it came together. I don’t actually know the best way to tell all of this, so I’ll keep my first promise and just stay in chronological order.

Minus 18 months: I talked to a girl online, she told me I could come over and spend the night. We had sex. We made a video afterwards, the actual audio transcription is, with me speaking first, “Are you going to marry me? Probably. Why? Because you are good in bed. You can’t marry me just because I’m good in bed. No, it’s your personality too. Okay, come touch me again.” The video ends, and we go to sleep right after. 18 months later, she tells the police that I raped her before that video.

Minus 12 months: I am talking to a girl online. She has Yahoo Messenger and invites me to watch her cam. She has 34 viewers and is going to town on herself with a dildo. My first two thoughts were, what the hell, and I have to add this girl to my contacts. We talk for a couple weeks. She has a boyfriend back home, but is allowed to have oral sex, but not vaginal sex, per the agreement. And I guess put on free cam shows for strangers… I end up going to see her 3 times over the next 4 weeks, no sex, and just trading favors. One day I’m at home, taking a few shots and playing a video game, I admitted I was a nerd. She asks me what I’m doing and I say hanging out and taking shots. She asks to come play and I of course can’t think of a reason why not to. She comes over, we do 3 shots together. My 8th, 9th, and 10th shot, her 1st, 2nd, and 3rd. We make a video after this of her performing oral on me, she seems very enthusiastic. 12 months later, she says she was too drunk to have agreed, so this is sodomy.

Minus 6 months: Night before this story, I twisted my knee being a drunk idiot. I limped for 6 months, but the day after was bad, I could only take 5 inch steps, and all hurt. I was an art photographer. I played with my cameras in the bedroom sometimes for fun, but I had cameras because I did a lot of photo shoots with friends and models. At this point I had 10,000 shots of 50 different friends and/or professional models. The fact girls let me make video and take shots was based largely on my reputation as a photographer who always kept what was private, private. A girl, again, met her online, agreed to pose for me a few days earlier. She was “technically deaf.” 80% in one ear, 90% in the other. But she could hear enough, she was never taught lip reading or sign. She didn't pose nude, but in some lingerie. There are photos of her in 3 different lingerie outfits she brought with her. Finishing each shoot, I make a 60 second video of the girl to document her mood, in hers, she is giggling so hard, she can barely speak. After the shoot, she drove me because I couldn't, to unlimited wing night to meet my friends. I couldn't walk well, she helped me walk the 2 blocks after we parked by holding my arm. Hung out with me and my four friends for 3 hours, laughing and eating wings, and after, drove me home and hugged me goodbye. She was a very sweet person. 6 months later when her boyfriend finds out she took the photos, says she never planned to pose in lingerie, and I forced her, by raising my voice. She did it because she was scared and was afraid to leave, there was no chance for her to get away. Because a raised voice is a threat

Minus 1 month: All these of these girls move on to the same dorm floor. It’s not like the only three girls I knew moved in together, but these three did. And that would have been fine, but I was known. So I at some point came up in their conversation. This part I got through mutual friends as later events unfolded, and I can’t be 100% sure of the time line. But what I heard was this. Girls 1, 2, and 3 tell each other their stories about how they all shared experiences with me. Girl 1 tells Girl 3’s boyfriend, that she posed nude for that guy from the website. Boyfriend gets angry with Girl 3, Girl 3 says it wasn't her fault, Boyfriend on the net and calls me a rapist, I say, “The only way for me to prove I’m innocent is to break my promise not to show her photos, please just leave me alone.”

BOOM! I come home and my house is trashed, everything I owned is in piles on my floor. 30 seconds after I see this, 4 police officers come in, push me to the floor, and handcuff me. I’m taken the station to be “questioned.” I don’t know what I’m being questioned about. Have you raped anyone? No, of course not. Have you taken photos, yes? Who of, I give names of models (god I was stupid). My computer is sent off to the local state Bureau of Investigation. It wasn't returned for 14 months. I eventually get a lawyer, spend 10 days in jail waiting for bail. My arrest is published in the paper. I was arrested and charged with rape, sodomy (oral sex from the “drunk” girl), sexual assault (“I forced her to pose for me”), and blackmail (“please leave me alone, the only way I can win this argument is to break a promise”).

My court appointed attorney was a former District Attorney in the county I was being tried. He used to work with all the Police and the District Attorneys trying me. I honestly believe he fought for me, and I can’t complain. So best case I got unique insights into what was happening and worst case he ignored his bias as did his job. One of the first things he told me, “They contacted over 30 of the other girls who posed for you that they found on your hard drive, they all say you were never inappropriate, but we have a problem. One of the girls in the photos was recognized by the police, she is the District Attorney’s daughter.” Told you that would come back to haunt me. There are two District Attorneys in the entire county. The one of my case was not the one whose daughter it was, so it didn’t matter. The fact the county only had 12 cops, 2 District Attorneys, and 1 Judge (that was only a Judge one day a week, and a lawyer the rest), was not important to my case. I was pretty much told by my lawyer that I was in for a fight and they wouldn't give up, I was advised to take a plea.

Where I am from, court is once a week, every motion is “we’ll meet back in 4 sessions.” Each session is a week, so each motion and recess is a month long. My entire trial was 2 hours or 8 months, depending on how you measure time.

1st Plea Offer: We’ll drop the blackmail charge, if you plead guilty to rape, sodomy, and sexual assault. Scared, I considered it, but decided asking to be left alone can’t be blackmail, I did a lot of research on the internet and was pretty sure you had to ask for something in return for blackmail, I had only asked not to be harassed on the internet. So I refused. They responded by dropping the blackmail charge anyway. This is when I learned they charge you with crimes they know they can’t convict you of, so they can use dropping them as leverage to get you to plead guilty to crimes they might not be able to convict you of.

2nd Plea Offer: We’ll drop the rape charge if you plead guilty to sodomy and sexual assault. Now I have to really think. They are dropping the last felony, if I plead guilty to misdemeanors. Thing is, it’s now been 5 months. I’m no longer scared. Now I’m just pissed. I tell them to go to hell.

In the next month, a mutual friend Girl 1 didn't know was a mutual friend, tells me what happened. They found the video of the girl saying she’d marry me because I was good in bed. They showed it to the Girl 1. She tells them she only said I raped her because the Girl 3 asked her to, in order to help hide from her boyfriend the fact she was willing to take photos. They offer her 6 months’ probation for filing a false report, she accepts the plea. Their response to this was to offer to drop that charge, if I plead guilty to the other false charges. I was never told she admitted to lying and had already accepted a plea agreement for filing a false report. When I refused, they had to drop it anyway, they had already charged and she already plead guilty to lying.

3rd Plea Offer: Now I know it’s more about the photos of the District Attorney’s daughter than the truth. I know they aren't being honest in their prosecution. Now I’m no longer pissed, I’m ready to rot in jail for the rest of my life before I admit to any of this BS. 6 months after the trial started, I end up in meeting with my attorney and the District Attorney. Now they have found the video of the 2nd girl. It one of 6 files in same directory as the last file, and the file name was the name of the girl, but it took the state Bureau of Investigation and an entire police force 4 more weeks to find it on my unencrypted hard drive. Not only is she obviously consenting, in the interview I mention, out of anger, it’s not like she didn't do it several times sober recently too. Turns out, that was never mentioned by the girl. They assumed I had met her the day she came over and had the shots. The fact she was performing oral sex on me several times before that day sober, had 1/3 as much to drink as me that day, and there was a video where she obviously was consenting and not drunk, was enough to get them to reluctantly drop the charge… If I would plead guilty to the sexual assault. I said no. They dropped it anyway.

Trial: I go on trial for sexual assault. All other charges have been dropped because the other plaintiffs are on video lying, and in the case of Girl 1, already plead guilty to lying because the plaintiff asked them to lie to the police. Girl 2 never committed a crime. She never said I did anything wrong. She just told the police I gave her 3 shots and she gave me head. In the context it was charged. She just left out, how we met, our existing “relationship,” the fact I had more to drink, and that a video existed of the encounter, and that she wasn't drunk and consented. Girl 3’s video I was told was corrupted and not able to be recovered. It was still on my hard drive when they returned my computer in the same place and playable by simple double clicking. My attorney comes to me, “I know the judge. He’s going to convict you, no matter what defense we put on. It’s a misdemeanor and I can only ask for a jury trial on appeal. So here is what I want to do. We’ll put up no defense. We are just going to sit there and let him convict you. It protects our defense from the District Attorney for the appeal, and there is no way a jury will convict you. It’s up to your, buy my advice is to put up no defense.” He’s an EX DA from this courthouse. He knows the girl in the photos that are pissing everyone off. HUGE LEAP OF FAITH. So I sit there. In a 15 minute trial she says she only posed because I raised my voice to her, which was asked in a louder and louder voice by the prosecution because she could only hear what he said when he raised his voice, and my attorney, just rested our case, neither of us spoke. I was asked if I thought I had adequate council. I literally said, “I really don’t know.” I was convicted, sentenced to two years in prison and would register as a sex offender for 7 years. As soon as I left the courthouse, I vomited. Appeal. My lawyer filed the appeal, and requested a jury trial.

4th Plea Offer: Not wanting a jury trial they couldn't win, the District Attorney offered me one last plea. They would reduce sexual assault to assault (punching a guy in a bar fight). And I would agree to 30 days probation. Take a second and really consider what you would do. I was just convicted and sentenced to serve two years in prison as sex offender. If I lost the appeal, I was looking at being raped, beaten, and unless I was lucky, killed. To avoid this, all I had to do was 30 days of probation, no jail time, and registering as a sex offender no longer applied. I had now been battling this court case for 8 months. So I did the only thing I shouldn't have done. I told my attorney I wanted my trial, I wanted to have my fucking case heard, I haven’t done anything wrong and If I have to die in prison, so fucking be it, I HAVEN’T DONE ANYTHING WRONG, I WANT SOMEONE TO LISTEN TO MY SIDE OF THE STORY. The charge was dropped with prejudice (double jeopardy applies and they can’t charge you again). After 8 months on trial for Rape, Blackmail, Sodomy, Sexual Assault, in the end I beat it by just not doing anything. I was asked to plead guilty in exchange for dropping charges they already knew were false and they planned to drop anyway. Not once did I get a chance to even defend myself. The papers still show my arrest record, I’m still on file as someone who was charged with all of these crimes.

To this day, it haunts me. Any police search done on me shows that I had these charges pending. If I go on a date with a girl who tells me her brothers a cop and might run a background check as a joke, I have to make an excuse not see her again. This is why I am here.