I've been mulling over what makes relationships really work well. Possible anatomy of a HVR High Value Relationship - the 3 Vs.

Vector - you both are headed the same direction, or vector. If you want kids and he doesn't? Hard pass. If you want to live somewhere urban and hop sushi bars and he wants to raise farm animals? Not going to work. You're young and midway through your career and he's old and wants to retire to Italy? Nope.

Values - you mesh on the important stuff like political ideas, religion, division of household labor, what "clean" actually means, circadian rhythms, accepted amount of family and friend meddling with the relationship, how you re-charge (introversion vs extroversion), what constitutes "fun", and where and how you spend money.

Velocity - you're growing at the same rate. Obviously total stagnation is a hard Nope as is lack of drive, energy, motivation ... you get the picture. So if you, for example, can break no sweat packing up and switching cities for a better job as needed, yet he's still working a job he hates for eight years? Hard pass.