An excellent vetting strategy early in the dating process is to "give men less than what they're expecting NOW , but still encourage their attentions in the FUTURE" and watch very closely to see how they react. Do they get mad when immediate gratification was denied? Do they start acting passive agressive, do they give up and start visibly acting dejected?

A man is not and should not be acting entitled to your time and affection. Anyone who does, is very likely an LVM.

I have often noticed that when I [enforce my bondaries] and honor myself and my time:

  1. don;t respond immediately to their messages
  2. write them back messages which are short (or shorter than what they wrote to me)
  3. ignore them for a bit, if they said/did something that was off-key
  4. end the phone call first ( in a polite way, - chatting has been great, but work/plans etc.)
  5. end the video chat first
  6. end the date first
  7. tell them I don;t kiss on the first date - when they try to go for it ( I do this in a very easy and polite manner)

A lot of men get really mad! As if they were entitled to have more. Anyone who acts visibly mad when you cut off their " access" and deny them their "wants" is not someone you want. They are the agressive ones who will try to use force/intimidation to pressure you into sex and disrespect your boundaries against your will.

The ones who start acting passive agressive/ acting dejected, will try to use verbal/mental/emotional manipulation to try to guilt you, gaslight you into giving them what they want, and will try to manipulate your will so that it looks like "you gave them what they wanted on your own "free" will" .

The ones who give up easily after being politely turned down NOW, but still encouraged for the FUTURE, are just no-confidence losers. They are absolutely worthless, because they lack the persistence, perseverance and confidence to work toward long-term results.

The reaction you want is them being understanding and accepting of your boundaries. They should let you pace the " courtship"