How many men would WANT a DV shelter, even if they needed it?

bat_doge69 · 2020-02-12T06:42:09+00:00

it's better than nothing

BornFreeWE · 2020-02-12T06:58:25+00:00

That you have to aks staff to unlock the door is for protection.

If the counselling is profesional and fair its a positive thing.

When you are talked at like an idiot its a problem how this shelter is run but has nothing to do with the idea of shelters.

I would go there if I had no other option or if I would be stalked.

BirdMington · 2020-02-12T07:41:19+00:00

In Hungary DV shelters for women are entirely different.

They are called protected houses and victims of domestic violence move there with their children. They are offered therapy but it's not mandatory. They have the opportunity to learn and get a career to start a normal life.

The problem is that it's exclusively for women who were abused, forced into prostitution or abducted. Men are not allowed at all.

Men have overcrowded homeless shelters where they are often robbed, no safety at all. Most of them can only be used at night. They are only available in bigger cities and homeless men in the countryside get no help at all. They are forced to live in tents in local forests.

Many of them lose their homes in a divorce and can't afford to pay rent after child support. Without a home address they can't get a job and it's a slippery slope from there.

These men could benefit from temporary housing where they get help to get back on their feet but there is no funding for it. Male victims of domestic abuse won't come forward because women have so much power over them in DV situations. It's too risky when all a woman has to do is cry to make others think that she is the real victim.

Men do need affordable shelters and help but the government won't fund it as long as society thinks that DV=female victims.

Lethn · 2020-02-12T15:31:31+00:00

Before the women’s shelter system existed, there was a lot of these same arguments - there just isn’t the need or the desire. Early numbers weren’t encouraging, either, but women slowly but surely began to hear about the system, talked to people it had helped, etc and over time whatever stigma there was has largely eroded.

We just have to do the same for men. Build it, and they will come.

But to argue that we don’t need it, because of statistics we don’t have, based on assumptions that are ultimately stereotypical at their root? That’s just a bigoted justification for why it hasn’t been built already.

duhhhh · 2020-02-12T12:21:49+00:00

DV shelters also provide counseling for the victims including children. They provide resources (e.g. paralegals, lawyers, retired judges/DAs) to help file restraining orders. Taking your kids to a DV shelter doesn't count as kidnapping your children so the abuser then gets sole temporary custody of them. Taking your kids to a DV shelter doesn't count as abandoning the family home so the abuser automatically gets it.

stentorian46 · 2020-02-12T17:23:06+00:00

Just to be clear, you are trying to convince men they shouldn't get help.

Toxic Masculinity.... thy name is feminism.

trash62 · 2020-02-12T15:18:37+00:00

It's just grooming for their new abusive boyfriend: the government.

Btw, what you describe is why we don't want classic socialism.

Title	How many men would WANT a DV shelter, even if they needed it?
Author	stentorian46
Upvotes	2
Comments	34
Date	February 12, 2020 6:39 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/f2n1z7/how_many_men_would_want_a_dv_shelter_even_if_they/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/how-many-men-would-want-a-dv-shelter-even-if-they.1200669 https://theredarchive.com/post/1200669

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