Walking away from work to be a stay at home mom - should I do it?

Unlucky-Sale489 · 2021-12-22T05:03:35+00:00

Ugh. This is such an awful and personal decision. I just left my career, one I loved, because after two rounds of pandemic IVF and almost dying in childbirth, I never got over how awful it felt to have so little time for my twins. Everyone told me I'd get used to it, that things would get better, but once I started asking people what life looked like as dual income parents, I realized the former was true and the latter was not.

I would say that if you're objectively okay with how things look right now and it's just an emotional struggle, it will likely improve. If you hate how little time you have and how you're always rushing, it likely will not. Ultimately, I decided that I'd been the career woman and could be her again, but my babies will never be small again.

Financially, we decided that if I was going to do it, it had to be now. Once we'd adjusted to the huge lifestyle change that is being parents, we'd be reliant on our dual incomes, even paying $1600 a month in daycare. I was bringing home an additional $800 on top of that and we figured if we didn't get used to having it, with our adorable new expenses, we wouldn't miss it as much. Now I'm finding other ways to make money from home and we're doing okay.

uncoolchick · 2021-12-22T07:45:04+00:00

Yes do it, but please dont get involved in MLM’s . They prey on stay at home wifes that want to make some extra money.

ProverbialMomma · 2021-12-22T04:03:48+00:00

It's going to be a lifestyle change for sure. You will likely need to trade out most luxuries in order to afford being home with your child. There will be a season of transition but if you and your spouse are in it together, you can do it!

taashaak · 2021-12-22T10:01:44+00:00

You will never get this time back with your children. That is a fact. Humans are now living longer and able to work longer and retire later in life (if needed). That is also a fact.

2021-12-22T04:13:47+00:00

Yes. I fail to see the point in having children only to let others raise them So that the corporations can keep making money off of your time.

breadcake5245 · 2021-12-22T12:30:31+00:00

As a a SAHM, I can honestly say I’m not stressed and truly enjoy my days with my children. I have time for all the housework and cooking. My husband never wants me to go back haha. Some days are hard and it’s an adjustment to not have any (or much) alone or adult time. But I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

titlejunk · 2021-12-22T04:19:49+00:00

This is a decision that is absolutely steeped in how much you trust your spouse.

My first husband asked me to be a SAHM and I wouldn’t even consider it. He could never have provided for our needs.

Ten years later I remarried and I trusted him and he could provide, but I had people in my life telling me not to relinquish control. In my head I didn’t want to. I came to him sobbing about it. We came up with accommodations to make me secure.

If you are not married the answer is NOOOOOOO!!!

If you are married, decide how much financial control you feel comfortable with.

We landed on a situation where he pays the bills, I have a credit card for household expenses (groceries and gas, mainly), and I get a certain amount of cash from him that he has zero say in how I spend.

2021-12-22T13:41:38+00:00

I just became a stay at home mom myself. I have my masters and an advanced license. I'll never look back... It is a financial adjustment but we were always really frugal people to begin with. Consignment clothing, bulk shopping, freezer meats, cloth napkins, that sort of thing. I think there is a huge shift right now... More one income homes and a baby boom. There are so many how to's online.

Independent-Skin-596 · 2022-01-10T03:16:06+00:00

I left a high profile project manager job 20 years ago! My daughter is now in college and my second is now in high school, I had two degrees but what I learned being at home would last through any pandemic or recession. I DONT regret it at all. You shield your children from a lot of unnecessary trauma! Society will not applaud you, but society is so screwed up, if you’re going against the grain, you’re doing great! God Bless and by the way I’m still at home, have less debt then when I left 20 years ago and I have my health because being at home you need to make sure you take care of yourself and read your Bible!

ComprehensiveNewt159 · 2021-12-22T07:49:43+00:00

No advice except consider selling on Poshmark/mercari if you want to stay home. It’s a great option to make some passive income. I sell on these platforms and it’s a great way to make some extra cash selling your clothes you don’t wear anymore. Best of luck!

rpgedgar · 2021-12-24T14:37:59+00:00

Talk to a financial advisor who can assess your spending habits and put together a budget to see if your goals are feasible.

Title	Walking away from work to be a stay at home mom - should I do it?
Author	Unlucky-Sale489
Upvotes	24
Comments	17
Date	December 22, 2021 3:53 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/rlwbkn/walking_away_from_work_to_be_a_stay_at_home_mom/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/walking-away-from-work-to-be-a-stay-at-home-mom.1212302 https://theredarchive.com/post/1212302

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