I'm very curious about this because when I've attempted to listen to certain topics of men's emotions and vulnerabilities, I've often needed to also discuss it with my friends however, I VERY rarely say who it's regarding, for privacy reasons of course. Those breaks in trust are always when it's unsafe for others or myself.

I try to find that happy medium, but occasionally fall short of expectations. Also very rarely that man will get greatly upset with me because I admit that I've shared this info "with a friend" to him and they register it as a form of betrayal when it wasn't in my honest and self-aware opinion.

While I now understand that all of those believed that I also said who it was, I do try to clarify afterwards. In my defense, I've had male friends admit very serious and dark issues (like their pedophilia from the past) and I am just not equipped, but was expected to take that on anyways.

I have talked to friends about this as well and 100% of them, both women and men, but mostly men, have said this is incredibly manipulative and I was right to cut off the friendship afterwards (of which they then put all my intimate info online as revenge, so they showed me who they really were afterwards anyways 😭).

I am autistic, but do have a decent grasp of right and wrong from my religion, though sometimes do fall short when I'm not paying attention, too exhausted, busy, or whatever. I never intend on hurting people, but sometimes do from not being able to find balance with my needs and theirs as boundaries are my #1.

I am not neither a therapist, nor do I present myself as one, but I do have "big sister" and Motherly vibes and everyone comes to me anyways. 😅

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So, for the women who are listening to you here, how can we find that balance better when we're not equipped for "trauma" or darkness talks, but want to be a friend and at least try to listen, and help you feel as safe as we're able?