Younger gf says I have maturity/mindset of a 20 year old. I am 26. How do I gain power in relationship?

grantbeef · 2018-01-11T12:59:35+00:00

How the fuck do I regain power in relationship?

By caring the least. Or, more positively, not caring the most.

Who gives a fuck if she thinks you're immature. What would she know? She's bankrolled by her parents and still at uni.

Real question is: Do you think you're immature? If not, she can fuck off. If yes, fix yourself.

Most likely though, you're making the mistake of assigning actual meaning to her words, like you would a friend.

It's a shit test. Either ignore, or agree and amplify. If she keeps pushing tell her if she doesn't like it to take a walk.

Understand this: The actual content of a women's words usually are usually nonsensical. However, the emotional IMPACT of her words are full of meaning. The IMPACT she is having is twisting you up trying to think of bullshit ways to impress her.

She is testing you. WIll her bullshit emotionally impact you: yes, it has--> no sex for you, faggot. Or, no, it doesn't: -->spontaneous blowjobs.

Never let a woman impact you emotionally. Logic is a man's tool, emotion a womans.

She only has the upper hand because you think you need to change to suit her opinion.

2comment · 2018-01-11T14:46:56+00:00

Don't argue this bullshit. Her situation vs yours says it all:

I maintain my house and two vehicles and I have had a career for 7 1/2 years.

Gf is 24 and in college. Lives at home with mom and dad.

The only mistake you made is to let her crapola get to you. You should just smile and say "20? Nah babe, I'm more like an 8 year old boy at heart.". Then grab your slingshot and shoot her cootied ass.

trancedj · 2018-01-11T12:54:12+00:00

Golden rule: the one who needs the other most loses. She either submits to your frame or not. If not, next.

IMO, following a divorce you should look to spinning plates. Speaking as someone who spent 20 years on the marriage plantation.

Archammes · 2018-01-11T13:51:56+00:00

Personally I'd just laugh at her while saying something along the lines of "says the kid still living at home" and dismiss the statement altogether. Then I'd probably be too busy the next couple of days to be bothered responding to anything she said.

grantbeef · 2018-01-11T13:05:26+00:00

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DocumentaryFob · 2018-01-11T18:23:47+00:00

It's one thing to act as if you don't give a fuck when she says this. I agree with this.

It's another thing to actually improve yourself so people consider you mature. It's an important trait to have. We don't know you well enough to know why exactly she considers you immature, but there are a few things people around your age group should keep in mind:

Don't use immature insults or terms. For example, don't call people a dick face or make fun of something that looks like a penis. Don't make fun of gay people and call them fags. Don't make fun of disabled people. Don't be racist. Confident people don't need to constantly put other people down or use immature terms & insults.
Make sure you have your shit together financially. Don't live with your parents. From your post, it sounds like you have your shit together in this regard.
Engage in high value activities. Don't try and hold your birthday party at Dave and Busters or Chuck E Cheese. Don't play video games all day. Think of it this way - if you'd never see a 50 year old CEO of a company do it, maybe you shouldn't be doing it either.

juliusstreicher · 2018-01-19T16:20:05+00:00

Ignore her. She's full of shit. At her age, she's showing her immaturity by measuring your behavior against a 20 year old. It reminds me of that scene from "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" where 17 year old Phoebe Cates writes to her 25 or 30 year old who called her immature, "You called me immature? You're the one who's immature!" She is either shit testing you or she's just being full of shit.

Don't try to make yourself look mature to a 24 year old girl who lives with her parents. Further, if she was so fucking mature, she would be already just about graduated from pharmacy school by now.

maxrp · 2018-01-11T13:13:07+00:00

10 months

LOL she didn;t even last a year in marriage, they don't know what they want! NGM

Gf is 24 and in college. Lives at home with mom and dad. They fully support her financially

dump this little girl, in uk we finish at 21 and have 3 years life experience in the real world by 24!

career driven.

when does she expect to have kids? and how long does she expect to be out of work? given shes 24 now. what i'm saying is at best she will work 5 years behind a counter, get bored, have a kid and never go back to work as you will financially take over where her parents leave off.

how do I come off as more mature in conversation?

why do you believe you are immature like a 20 year old? because she said so? shes playing you.

Is it the topics I discuss?

she needs to accept you for who you are, she must learn to be tolerant, and listen to you. it doesn't matter what the topic is.

Clearly she feels that she holds the power.

she feels entitled to you and be a bitch to you, walk away from her find a better girl.

zboo1h · 2018-01-11T17:17:23+00:00

If a little girl can get your goat this hard then you really are immature my dude.

[deleted] · 2018-01-11T17:16:46+00:00

Next her. See her panic when she realized the shit thst backfired. (dread)

Or pass it like any other, agree and amplify

Take no shit.

Title	Younger gf says I have maturity/mindset of a 20 year old. I am 26. How do I gain power in relationship?
Author	grantbeef
Upvotes	3
Comments	29
Date	January 11, 2018 12:35 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/7pnsr7/younger_gf_says_i_have_maturitymindset_of_a_20/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/younger-gf-says-i-have-maturitymindset-of-a-20.121814 https://theredarchive.com/post/121814

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