Evening gents, I’m looking for your support/wisdom/guidance more than ever.

Preface: UK, M(32), No kids. Amicable split. Married for 5 years but together total for 15.

Tonight, after stalling for so long, I finally had the courage to tell my wife I am leaving her and want a divorce.

I stalled for so long because I didn’t want to cause her so much hurt, didn’t want to continue to hurt each other by not being fully committed to the marriage, or hurt the wider family. In the end, though everyone took it well, it was unavoidable.

I’ve wanted for a long time due to unhappiness and difficulties within the marriage. Difficulties which are not easily reconciled and something I’ve openly said I don’t want to commit to resolving. I’ve accepted that, and I have accepted that I am also at fault in failing her and the marriage.

Gents, what I need help with is dealing with leavers guilt; my brain is very efficient at holding my hostage to guilt (with intrusive thoughts and imagery). And I know, the irony is not lost on me being a Psych Nurse…

I know there is no right way forwards, but what’s some good first steps?

Thanks :)