I tried to articulate the perfect words to sum up what I think about the recent beauty pageant hosted in El Salvador without coming off as a complete homophobic and disrespectful straight Hispanic man.

But, regardless, the only words I can think of to describe this disaster are "high-class fuckery."

I mean, the pageant is owned by a transvestite who has stated that it will be run by women and owned by a trans man.The oxymoron right! Then there were two more sweet transvestites who competed and somehow managed to kick out two other beautiful but miserable women. One woman later cried out victimhood!

Listen, before you come down my throat and call me homophonic, please know that I respect everyone and their decisions. I don’t really give a damn what sex you identify with. Heh, I sometimes identify as a pokemon, preferably a Bulbasaur. It helps maintain my sanity because I am so desensitized by all the bullsh*t around me. And I’m only referring to the business side of things here.

So, let’s finally look at it from a business standpoint. Why on God's green earth would you allow two trans women to compete in a women’s beauty pageant? I mean, isn't the majority of the audience made up of straight men and women? The woman who cried out victimhood, did you not think her entire county would stop watching after seeing a trans take her spot? Isn't there millions of people and millions of dollars at stake here? The more I think about it, the more confused I become, and the more my head f*kcing hurts.

Listen, the fact is that the vast majority of the populace is made up of straight people. Both men and women (and other gays) are all drawn to female natural beauty. For men, it’s about the fantasy here. There is no fcking rocking science going on. Miss Nicaragua, oh my goodness. She is my dream girl; she is the woman I want to marry and show off to everyone. But only Miss Nepal gave me w*t dreams up in here. I didn't realize I needed a fluffy woman until I saw her, eating that burrito. Now, when I saw the two trans, I didn't feel a sh!t perhaps a little yuck but other than that, nothing. And that's ok. The phase go woke go broke has never be truer here.