I don't know anywhere else to talk of this so here we go.

Want to preface this saying i am not very good looking, a nerd in interests too, and overall not relationship minded, and while i had my share with LTR dating (4 years of a toxic one, rejectes a few opportunities after).

And so far the very existance of MANY hot girls, the risks of hitting on them, and some very solid competition, is really taking it's toll on me.

I can't even focus on my purpose of just coming to class and studying, because i am constantly reminded of my dating failures by merely coexisting with other people normally, it's at minimum, incredibly frustrating.

Especially when girls actually do show some interest, it is in a very structured manner looking for commitment fast.

I guess because i look nerdy, dress well with good quality clothes, and my overall behaviour basically signifies i am a "rich kid", which i actually am btw, but well i am no sugar daddy, and it makes me jump a few assumptions.

I HIGHLY suspect my girlfriend mainly dated me for the lifestyle, her family was both broken and broke, so interacting in a stable family with some money to spare was her main thing, disgusting btw.

And the pattern other girls show when both showing and not showing interest, puts me solidly in the "passable given something is provided", and well, that's no real attraction, and i hate this type of interest being the only i was ever shown, even as a kid, shockingly.

Given the fact that i actually hate the dynamics of LTR's, it has left me on the dry for long.

For a TLDR, i have a bunch of friends, they seem to care about me, as when i go missing they actually reach out, women included, but in the sex/relationship/dating department, i am largely ignored, or actively try to get scammed.

All of this makes me want to not actually play the dating game at all, but living in a society and having a libido is basically constantly rubbing it on my face, all the time.

This is clearly a rant, but honestly the amount of work and transformation that the market is requiring me to do, it's not rewarding at all, but giving up is not that easy either.

How you guys "on the path" actually plow through this kind of thing?, seeing "you" working your ass off to get things that literally just happen organically to everyone else, all the while part of this path is constantly getting those facts rubbed on your face because ambients like work, college, clubs, the fucking supermarket, you are forced to see the "naturals" just having a good time, like wtf.

Anyway i am just tilted af, i just wanted to finish my fucking major with being blue balled 24/7.