At 33, I've had my first coffee date (and any semblance of a date) ever!

To keep it concise: She was someone I cold approached at the gym, got her contact info, we talked for a bit then met up. Had coffee for like 1.5 hrs, then chatted at the beach for 1.5 hours.

She's a traveling nurse, so she's not in town for long (leaves in 2 months) so she's not after anything serious, but it was nice to finally get myself to a place where I could have an interaction like this.

This is a huge win for me for a few reasons:

  1. I'm entering new territory. I keep logs of my growth, and in them, I talk about my history of depression, anxiety, low self esteem & avoidance that have plagued the majority of my life. Thanks to therapy, getting my body in shape, and understanding more about who I am, my self confidence has never been higher. I still have work to do (better wardrobe, better lifestyle, etc) but I'm glad to be at a place where my confidence has grown this much in just a few months of self investment.
  2. It felt good to share things about me with other people, especially someone I found to be quite interesting & attractive. It was awesome to meet a woman with a really cool depth to her character. I felt stiff at times, and not sure where to carry certain convos, but things still felt fine. I also learned more about me in the process, and how I'm much cooler than I ever took myself for.
  3. While I don't expect anything to come out of it (especially with bad logistics), I'm completely ok with it. We talked about hanging out again, but if it doesn't transpire, that's fine. If she never answers my follow-up text, that's also fine. I enjoyed the experience, and learned a lot.
  4. I'm discovering my 'type' & what I'm interested in. It's a different feeling to see it unfold in front of you.

I've also learned:

- I'm a respectful, sexually assertive male. I like to go after what I'm interested in, even if it means cold approaching.

- I build courage by facing fears, not hiding behind stories/excuses/ego/pride.

- If I can get a phone number, I can do it again. If I can get someone to meet up with me, I can do it again.

- I enjoy chatting w/ beautiful women. I enjoy keeping my intentions clear & acting on my desires. I enjoy meeting new people in general.

-Therapy has to be the most life changing investment I've made. I doubt I'd come this far as a man if not for that.

I still have many areas to learn and grow in. I want to build a quality life with quality women. I'm going to use today to help me grow, as well as continuing to invest in myself.

Here's to getting better,

Cheers.