Worried I just don’t make the cut

expert_advice · 2022-02-11T15:29:46+00:00

Why did you put 'confident' on the list? You are currently not confident about it. I remember, when I was in a relationship (not first), I invited a girl to my apartment. I've never had sex before, but a good kissing experience. At that time I was scared af (irrational), but made some homework: read about women's physiology and a few how-to articles. Morning next day was nothing special really, I just had a smile the whole day and that's it.

There was some hindrance that kept me virgin (mostly in my mind) which has been found on therapy. Here are a few general questions to ask yourself that can help you to understand your hindrance:

What are your sexual preferences?
Do you watch porn? If yes, what kind of porn?
What are you fantasizing about? How far is it from partners you've met before?
What was your childhood? Do you feel that some of the episodes are extremely unhealthy in some ways?
Are the girls you choose look similar like one of your parents or are they have a similar personality?
What are you feeling guilty about?
Do you feel comfortable being naked in front of someone?

I'll recommend going to the therapist, there is nothing wrong with it and a journey can be hard, but some understanding will not be superfluous. Hope you'll do good!

TherealPadrae · 2022-02-11T20:23:21+00:00

If you talk to 1000 women. 400 will like you enough to have a conversation. 250 will give you they’re numbers. 180 will reply to you’re messages. 70 will go on a date. 40 will show up. 15 will like you. 5 you will like. Then 1 will stay around… (that’s a very cynical guess btw) even with bad game and a good heart anything is possible don’t lose hope. Go hang around sociable people and have fun. Have as many fun conversations with women as you can and see what happens. Get yourself some friends that are women. Hard work can make anything happen (within reason).

Kind-Standard-536 · 2022-02-11T07:39:52+00:00

There’s people that get a lot more, with a lot less. You’re doing something wrong with your interactions and you’ve got to figure that out

ld20r · 2022-02-11T11:05:23+00:00

As someone in a similar position I’d like to throw out a spanner in the works.

Maybe your actually not the problem at all and have done everything you can with what you have.

When it comes down to it we can better ourselves and work on ourself every single day until the end of time, that’s in our control.

Unfortunately what’s not in our total control is a a person liking you or not, that is completely up to fate and luck.

So don’t put yourself down too much, it can be hard and I relate but all you can do is put your best foot forward and take opportunities whenever they come to socialise with people and let the chips fall as they may.

That is all anybody can do. Your not always the problem and don’t for a second think that females don’t shoulder there own insecurities and flaws because they do too.

SoulRebel99 · 2022-02-12T02:51:27+00:00

Sex therapist, intimacy coach, and probably a lot of fun sexy dates and outings are in your future. You have to take the initiative! Also you may want to check your physical health and Testosterone levels!

scarred4lyfee · 2022-02-11T06:55:06+00:00

You need to evaluate where you are going wrong and fix that. Only you can do that. We understand fractions of glimpses you provide about your life to us! More importantly, read articles related to your issues from forums such as SoSuave.

thelambofdeth · 2022-02-11T13:44:03+00:00

Go.to.therapy.

Title	Worried I just don’t make the cut
Author	Alive-Doughnut2345
Upvotes	8
Comments	7
Date	February 11, 2022 4:09 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/sppyrl/worried_i_just_dont_make_the_cut/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/worried-i-just-dont-make-the-cut.1267025 https://theredarchive.com/post/1267025

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