We all know the general rule to conquering AA. Basically, it boils down to "quit being a pussy, be confident in yourself, you're awesome, show her how awesome you are, etc...". Which is all fine and dandy, but for me, it just wasn't enough. I never had proof that I was awesome. I thought I was, but my mindset for the longest time was "how am I awesome?". And honestly, I didn't know.

So here is where my theory comes in. My hope is that it works for those of you who linger on seddit for months on end without ever approaching a girl, much like I did. It's often talked about on here about how making improvements in your dating life leads to improvements in your every day life. More confidence with women = more confidence in life = better jobs, more money, more friends, etc. But what if we reversed that formula? What if building confidence in your every day life first then led to having the confidence to approach women with a shit load less AA than you had before?

I was a longtime seddit lurker, read everything I could on pick up, tried to become an expert without actually practicing. I'm a fairly attractive guy, but I was always too scared to ever initiate anything with women, afraid of failing miserably and then being wrecked about it. I had two girlfriends in high school, lost my virginity to one, and then went my first three years in college without a girlfriend, only having sex once on a super drunken night. My friends and family began wondering if I was gay. It was bad. Then my friends convinced me to do a tough mudder with them. If you don't know what a tough mudder is, go google it. It's pretty awesome. Anyways, I began training for it, and two months ago completed this grueling course, self titled "The toughest event on the planet". And you know what, it sure as hell was. It was the hardest thing I had ever done in my life, and I'm a college athlete. The next week, full of pride after completing this obstacle course, I saw a cute girl walk past me at school. And without thinking about it, I turned around, ran up to her, introduced myself, got her number, and went on two dates with her (she ended up being a really horrible person, but hey, that part isn't important here). Knowing I had completed this course had filled me with all sorts of confidence. If I could complete a Tough Mudder, I sure as hell could strike up a conversation with a cute girl for five minutes. Ever since then, I've been approaching women regularly, with decent results. I have work to do to become an expert, but the point is I've started, and I'm actually doing something now, and have the confidence to actually go out and practice.

Now I'm not saying all of you should go out and complete a Tough Mudder. That just worked for me, and was something I enjoyed. But what I am saying is that you should go out and complete something difficult. Something you have to work towards. Whether it's a Tough Mudder, losing 10 pounds, learning to play an instrument, or getting straight A's at school, set a goal that requires some work. Because when you put in the effort, and you see the results, I'm willing to bet that the confidence you gained from completing your goal will then spill over into your dating life, giving you more confidence when it comes to approaching women. If you put your mind to something and achieve it, you start to realize that you can do anything, and especially do something as simple as talk to a girl.

TL;DR Go out and work towards something difficult outside of approaching women, and the confidence you gain will spill over into your dating life