Hello reddit!

First of all, sorry for any kind of engrish this post could have. I just want to share you a realization I had in the past few days.

I'm a regular guy who has been struggling being a nice guy all his life, but I've been improving self-respecting for the last few months, and I hope these insights can help people like me.

My insight is:

DON'T LET YOURSELF INVOLVED IN OTHER PEOPLE'S DRAMAS. PERIOD!

You see, eight months ago, when I still was stuck in a bad relationship, I thought my ex-girlfriend was the only person in the world that could suck up all my physical and mental energies with all her drama, and until five months ago when we broke up, I still had the same opinion, but something happened that made me realized it was't her fault, BUT MINE!

You see, she wasn't approaching me and started to talk to me about all her problems, It was ME the one who wanted her to tell me about them, and at the end it wasn't really a real problem, just some emotional baggage she had to deal with.

Things like: I had a verbal fight with some girl at work; I saw my ex-boyfriend last day with another girl; My friends won't hang out with me next weekend, etc.

At the end, it was ME who was feeling exhausted, it was ME who couldn't concentrate on anything else, it was ME who was feeling depressive or angry. And you know what? My problem wasn't exclusive to my Ex - Everytime I saw someone sad or upset without knowing whether something serious or petty was happening to them, it was ME letting them to cry on my shoulder; to friends to family members, to romantic interests, they didn't really came looking for me, it was ME who was interested in their drama, It was ME who was trying to fix up their problems. And those same people that get used to use you as their emotional sponge, came looking for you everytime they had one of their drama spells, because YOU were the one who triggered that reaction; YOU were the one who wanted that since the beggining and now they're are draining up all you're energies. YOU were the one who could've avoided that since the beginning, and people start to loss respect for YOU AND YOUR TIME.

So I tried something; I closed my Facebook account for three months, and I left all that drama behind. In that time I started to put more attention to my own needs, and stop caring about things that didn't concern me. And guess what? My life started to get brighter day by day, I started to laugh again; I hit the gym five days a-week; and I watched the movies or played the videogames I wanted, and I was happy not caring about people problems 24 hours a-day. NO MORE DRAMA!

Have you ever looked the way a carefree person behaves around people? They just enjoy just being themselves, they're are happy the way the express themselves around people, and they don't give importance to other people opinions. And when other people approach them with their problems, they don't have time for them because they're busy only for their own priorities, so they just try to cut the conversation as fast as possible and get outta there. Just look around, that person must be in your group of friends. That's the person you should be! The person who don't get into other people's business that doesn't concern him and when he have to deal with them, he takes them with a funny or a easygoing approach. And people start respect him, and his time! Because he respected himself since the beginning.

So, set your priorities! Drama isn't equal to real problems, like family, health or working matters. Drama is the inmature way people perceive the world! Who knows, you're the one who sets his own priorities in your life.

Hope this insight can be useful for some of you, this has been told before in so many different ways and I hope my POV can help. See ya!