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I hug-closed a French girl in Bali but everything was ruined by my lack of experience and ability

[deleted]

December 2, 2015

0 upvotes

/r/seduction

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Title	I hug-closed a French girl in Bali but everything was ruined by my lack of experience and ability
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	0
Comments	19
Date	December 2, 2015 2:14 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3v570f/i_hugclosed_a_french_girl_in_bali_but_everything/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-hug-closed-a-french-girl-in-bali-but-everything.1306119 https://theredarchive.com/post/1306119

Comments

[–]tasmanian101 5 points6 points7 points 10 years ago (17 children) | Copy Link

[–]TheXXL4 points 10 years ago [recovered] (4 children) | Copy Link

She has a boyfriend. Girls don't cheat unless they want to really.

Absolutely right.

It's not worth the effort trying to change her mind when she's already decided you want to bang and she's faithful.

Is she? would you vouch for it?

Move on. Find a girl who isn't with someone. Don't cancel your plans for a girl who already explicitly told you not, not sexual, and all you want is sexual

Agreed on not changing plans, and in this case moving on, but fact is: women say one thing, and maybe in the moment they mean it, but then something miraculous happens... emotions. Damn those little fuckers...

They make people do stupid things, and in case of women in relationships, they can make them act on their eomtions. She is on vacation, a good looking guy comes to her ,sweeps her off her feet, and she cannot even remember why she is suddenly sucking his dick, but well... it just happened, she is not responsible for it... That is reality my friend, if you like it or not.

[–]tasmanian101 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]TheXXL 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]tasmanian101 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes, I am not confident with my riding skill (of course, I am not confident with something I am obviously not good at). But I was actually pretty confident in approaching her and talking.

Women spend a lot of their life breaking down social situations and people. They feel it subconsciously when a guy is in-congruent in his attitude. You can't ignore her tests and go in for a limp handshake and finish it out asking for a hug; and claim confidence. You would have addressed her boyfriend with some witty thing like, well hes not here now. You grab her hand, or waist. You hug her without asking. You take what you want and say how you feel without fear.

If you aren't confident in your riding skill, are you going to be confident enough to make her want to go on a ride? Things like that bleed through, and women notice it. Acting confident and being confident are pretty damn close.

[–][deleted] 10 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link

[–]tasmanian101 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago* (10 children) | Copy Link

To some. I prefer the polarization method.

You want to polarize people to become receptive or unreceptive quickly, and work on those receptive and move on from those not.

Most people balance on neutral. You start flirting with a girl, she drifts away, you can try some game neggs or w/e to try and reengage her. But if shes still cold, why obsess and put in so much more effort to try and turn this one cold chick around. Move on to the next girl and see how she responds to you.

There's no rejection in deciding to look for better prospects. Its a very low level investment until you find a girl who becomes receptive when your flirting. And then you dump your energy into that, go home and bang.

To highlight all the reasons your pickup was destined to likely fail before you even started. Polarization illuminates incompatabilties early so you can move onto better prospects.

shes 30, your 23, she thinks your 25. Shes not a cougar and you are too young to be highly attractive.

Shes taller than you

Maybe she only likes white dudes

She has a boyfriend

Shes not drunk or intoxicated, shes thinking clearly, of potential consequences and is able to rationally consider the gains

Her being sober and you not being a well oiled suave machine is gonna have grindy parts, eg hand holding

You stuck around. Invested way to much time and energy playing a deck that is stacked way against you. Instead you could be searching for something easier that you could tackle. After she threw up her first no. You can choose to try anf break through that. Or you could have politely ended the convo and asked for her #, when those other two girls came by. Then run up to them and see what they are up to. Instead you walked her nearly home, sorta tried to make a move but non verbally, and then asked for a hug when she again rejected. Thats not attractive man, its needy, clingy, and weak. You can't just ignore her rejections and move past them without saying anything, you have to verbally address that stuff. What if some girl you dont want much to do with, kept trying to hold your hand and waist and everytime you told her no get off, she does it again a minute later, and shes following you home...

You can't make everyone interested in you. In fact, its hard to get most people to like you. But you can find those who are receptive to your advances and interest. And get those girls to go from neutral to interested in you.

[–][deleted] 10 years ago* (9 children) | Copy Link

[–]tasmanian101 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]tasmanian101 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

"But not like boyfriend, girlfriend yeah?" with her French accent. Haha But when farewell, I asked her to hug me which she did. :)

Thats not a joke. Thats her flat out rejecting any possibilty of romantic interest for the third time.

"You should go to France and spend some time there", I replied "Or maybe I can find myself a French girl". She laughed and said "But not me, I have a boyfriend in Paris

Asserting a friends only level. A hehe, maybe. Is receptive. Saying I have a boyfriend, is not.

I also sucked in escalation, the timing was not right when I tried to hold her hand and I didn't hold it right. The first attempt was too light, I struggled to match her hand with my hand. The second attempt, same thing happened. I struggled again except that this time was too firm until she said "oucchhh!"

Girls who like you hold your hand. They interlace their fingers with yours. She did not want to hold your hand.

gave me her email

She is being friendly. You want to be more than friends. She doesnt. Am I missing any signs showing her being sexually interested in you? Thats what I mean by cold.

Receptive to your sexual advances and escalations. Being friendzoned for lack of a better term, is not receptive.

[–][deleted] 10 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]tasmanian101 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]tasmanian101 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]psn22556 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Rootbeer_Guy09 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link