First date: Steps from bar to sex location (you home)

2010-11-16T13:38:48+00:00

If you make out at the bar, don't be surprised if she won't come home with you.

Because then, she knows that all that's left for your place is sex, and thus she is pressured into it. Even if a girl is planning on sleeping with you, she likes to at least have the option to tell herself that she'll stop after kissing (typical self-ASD).

If you're making out at the bar, you've removed that option and now she can't justify going back to your place unless she's ready to commit, right at that moment, to sex.

"Hey, let's go to ___." Take her hand, and go.

EDIT: It's saving my number "2" as a "1," not sure why, just go with it.

cheddarchexmix · 2010-11-16T18:51:53+00:00

This may be controversial advice, but I've found in my experience that I am much more successful at getting a girl directly back to my place (either the night I meet her or on first date) if I have NOT kissed her yet. I escalate kino the whole way, even sometimes to hand under shirt / down pants if she's really into it, but I don't make out with her.

On the other hand, if you don't think sex is on the table for that night, kissing her is fine.

As for how to go back to your place, I like taking her to at least 2-3 different bars, each time leaving by standing up and saying "come on lets get out of here" and then walking to a nearby bar. Then when I think she's ready to come back to my place, I say "come on let's get out of here", and when we get outside I say "let's go back to my place, I want to play that [blah] for you" where [blah] is a band I like that I have brought up that she has never heard of.

gentlemanofleisure · 2010-11-16T13:36:02+00:00

it is always a good idea to escalate if you are doing it right, ime.
lead and pace. tell her 'we're going to my place to [whatever, but not sex] she will show resistance (anti slut defence) you need to pass the test.

an example from my recent past. i was at the bar near my house with a girl i met online. we had chatted online a fair bit and i always escalated those chats with a strongly sexual frame. i had her get on skype and take her shirt off. all of this adds up to, she knew what was going to happen as soon as i got her alone.

once we were finished in the bar i said, 'let's go to my place, i'm freezing and i want to get a jumper' she said something like 'i'm not going to your house :0' i said, 'ok then, do you want me to drop you off at the bus stop on the way?' she didn't say anything and quietly followed me home, chatting and stuff.

once home, the game starts again, comfort, frame control, kino, escalate.

2010-11-17T04:52:48+00:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d5CTEQ8SeIs&feature=related

Skip to 4:35. That's how it's done.

2010-11-17T01:29:10+00:00

Pick a bar near your place.

Say "You know, I have better drinks for free at my apartment. Let's go there."

Or just give her any good pretense for going. You both know it's for sex, but you don't always need to be blatant about it. It can make the transition a lot smoother.

Title	First date: Steps from bar to sex location (you home)
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	3
Comments	10
Date	November 16, 2010 12:44 PM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/e6xc3/first_date_steps_from_bar_to_sex_location_you_home/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/first-date-steps-from-bar-to-sex-location-you-home.1313014 https://theredarchive.com/post/1313014

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