i'm 19 years old and i've never kissed a girl. i feel like it's holding me back from being able to confidently approach a girl because in the back of my mind I know i will be extremely nervous and not be able to go in for the kiss. any tips on overcoming this?

torgknee · 2011-04-17T08:15:56+00:00

[permanently deleted]

MaysonNSS · 2011-04-17T11:02:45+00:00

Getting a kiss is pretty easy and that is the good news. The bad news is it will require you to do things that you are not comfortable with.

First thing is learn what kissing IOI's are. Learn when she is ready to be kissed (which you will find happens REALLY quick) and then practice getting girls to that point over and over again. This process is called calibration and will help you immensely.

EffingFrench · 2011-04-17T17:42:24+00:00

I was your age when I first kissed a girl. What I was worried the most was that I was a bad kisser. I didn't know if I was or not, I just thought I was since I never kissed.

I got tired of this and kissed the first girl that showed IOI's in a friends' party. She told me I was a godlike kisser and probably a ladies man. I laughed at her.

The point is, if you're afraid of technique, don't be, as long as you don't shove your tongue down her throat or put too much saliva in there, there's nothing to know. Trust your instinct.

If it's just the anxiety of getting rejected, learn to spot IOI's. As Mayson said, triangular gazing, the urge to touch you, touching her hair, showing off her neck, leaning in to you when you speak, etc. Just tell yourself you need one to know she's ready for the kiss. If she shows three, then you NEED to kiss her. No excuse.

Ninja edit : Forgot to say, it's easier to place your fingers on her chin and turn her head to let her know what you're gonna do. If she rejects you, she'll reject your hand, not your mouth. I found it easier then.

General_Awesome · 2011-04-17T19:31:24+00:00

Holy shit, I just turned 19, never been kissed too, never really talked to a girl (well, there was this one ugly wench, she wasn't my type :p )

SpiderFan · 2011-04-17T21:23:34+00:00

Tina Fey didn't lose her virginity till 24.

whitenoise89 · 2011-04-17T15:39:08+00:00

Just kiss the cute girls.

I've recently redefined my approach. Shrugged off all the care about my insecurities, as well as the social "No-No's".

Just kiss the cute girls, keep them in your life while you have them, and let them come / go.

2011-04-17T23:03:24+00:00

:O IT'S ME!!! BUT DIFFERENT!!! BUT THE SAME!!! You have to find a girl who when it's your first time for something either a) it means nothing to either of you and she doesn't know. b) she means something to you and she knows but make it clear there's no pressure on making it special

I went for a) with the first kiss which was fine. So many girls are nervous about it not being special so they dont want to be the one to do it. With losing my virginity the girl meant something to me but half way through she said " I dont think we should do this, it should be special for you" Like what the fuck? Seriously you don't want that mind fuck. So yeah just make sure that with all the first time stuff you have either of those and not something whereby you'll get hurt.

If it's with some random girl and she makes fun of you then it doesn't matter. She's a random girl. Just try to do what she does. You'll discover a lot of people kiss in very different ways. The way to be good is just to try to copy what they do.

calidity · 2011-04-18T02:25:24+00:00

Im 17 and got my first kiss last night. I was in your shoes on the mindset. You really just need to escalate with her until you are touching a lot. Then look in her eyes and at her lips. I made the mistake of waiting all night long to kiss her. If you think its time, go for it. It's better to go for it then to never go for it at all.

General_Awesome · 2011-04-17T15:12:21+00:00

Just get chill. I was 18 when I finally kissed a girl. The main thing is to not give excuses. Say it with me. I WILL NOT GIVE EXCUSES. Get over the AA and get some experience.

Comments